#i'm probably inviting a lot of discourse and hate but w/e

[thecat-inthehat]

I’m trans. And that affects how I play and interact with XIV. 

I always hesitate to talk about my trans-ness, or trans characters, and I usually feel weird about it when I do, or that I’m somehow indulging in a way. I always feel like I never have anything important to say, or that I’m being a whiny entitled brat about it, or that no one cares. So I think I’ll try and talk a little about it.

I’ve seen some really good trans wols or adventurers, and it makes me really happy to witness, seeing more people Like Me out in the world. It’s not often that I feel lonely being trans, but it really does lift my heart to see others around and enjoying the world that love.

That being said, XIV fandom, and fandom as a whole, still isn’t that kind to trans “headcanons” about canon characters. Fandom’s been pretty okay about trans WoLs, though the erp’ers in the Quicksand have a serious problem with their transphobic ‘futa’ or ‘femboy’ shit. I don’t have Helisent’s gender in her search info, because I don’t want her to be called slurs in game while I’m just trying to do my damn roulettes. More often than not though, it’s the little comments here and there, or worse, the indifference. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen rare art or fic for trans xiv characters, only to have comments about how “that character is cis” or “is this a girl/boy version of x?” Those comments hurt, and those comments are transphobic. (Genderbends are their own post, but by and large they are transphobic as well.)

I say “headcanons” because there’s very little textual evidence that any particular character is cis. It’s just assumed to be that way, that cis is the default, and people thinking that a particular character is trans is a headcanon. Sometimes adding trans!(character) can be ... othering. I understand that sometimes people use those tags as a flagship, a way of saying “hey, it’s safe over here, come join us”, and I appreciate those. But sometimes it’s just exhausting to deal with the idea that cis is always the default, nevermind the fact that there’s sometimes mean comments about “but that character isn’t trans”. Damn it, we don’t really have evidence for one or the other a lot of the time, we only see that character’s gender presentation. 

And sure, you can say that that’s largely because XIV is built and developed around the idea that Eorzea operates on the gender binary -- it’s not exactly pushing the boundaries on gender, or made by openly trans or queer people. While I’m sure that there are trans or queer people that work on XIV, the goal of XIV isn’t to be “Eorzea trans adventure”. I get that. Most of the media I consume is made under the assumption that the fictional world is cis, and I’m not surprised that the characters therein are presumed to be cis. I understand the reasons why it is the way that it is. 

Fiction, and by and large fandom, is a transformative experience. The Devs for XIV have gone on record saying that they keep a lot of things ambiguous to let players have fun, especially in regards to shipping, or the timeline. That should, and does, extend to trans or cis headcanons about characters or how you interact with them. I’m not saying you have to go out and view particular characters as trans (though that would be nice), more ... be mindful of the fact that everyone experiences the game differently, and that cis isn’t the default setting, just a common one.

I guess I don’t really have a point here, just some thoughts that have been knocking around in my head, especially after seeing some unintentionally cruel and transphobic comments on friend’s art. So just... I dunno, be kind. Think critically about a trans “headcanon”, and what it might mean to someone, or how it might influence a character’s arc, or the way they interact with the world. Yeah, there’s some real bad fetishization out there with regards to trans headcanons, but that’s not really what I’m talking about here. Just keep an eye out, and look at things with an open mind.

Anyways, Ardbert’s trans. Lucia is too. So is Minfilia. Thancred is “I’m a man (I think???)”. Alphinaud is trans, and I have the most evidence for that one. 

Sadu’s canonically genderfluid -- her last three lives were male. Urianger is canonically gender non-conforming, and I’m willing to bet that he’s got some interesting ideas about gender. All the Ascians have the ability to mold and shape the flesh of their host, so in what world would they be cis? 

Just... think about it, I guess. I’m happy to talk about it if anyone’s curious.