#i'm patient but checking in is one thing and guilt-tripping is another

[austerulous]

Rules have been updated.  You’ll find the gist of what’s been tweaked in the tags. I’m gaming tonight but I’ve got tomorrow free, so I’ll be around then. ♡

[scientia-rex]

I also spend a lot of time trying to convince people to prevent problems, because prevention still works better than cures. Don't fucking smoke! I would instantly become the best doctor who ever lived if I could just convince all my patients to quit smoking. Avoid alcohol! Don't do meth! Don't do fentanyl! Things that are poisons will poison you in ways you understand, in the short term, but also ways you can't really understand until you've watched dozens of people die from it thirty years later, struggling to breathe from their COPD or weak and nauseated beyond bearing from their end-stage liver disease. I watched a man take 3 weeks in the ICU to die from what meth did to his heart. Your heart isn't meant to beat 145 times a minute for weeks on end. Your liver isn't meant to metabolize 5 shots of gin a day. You aren't going to be able to use denial and willpower to repair the damage your own habits did.

I drink a lot less now than I did before I went into medicine. Lot of different reasons, including that I'm older and more settled. But I can't look at it the same way I used to; I can't brush off as a "fun quirk" what I know is alcohol use on a level that risks withdrawal seizures if they were to suddenly stop, like some of my family members do, nervously asking me about their loved one's drinking when we're alone because beneath the jokes they know it's a problem.

If you're having more than one, maybe two drinks a day on average, over a long period of time, you are damaging your body in ways you don't understand. You're setting up a permanent heightened inflammatory state. Your heart cells don't like alcohol; Google "alcohol-induced cardiomyopathy." Your esophagus and stomach respond to incessant bathing in poison by first developing wounds and then cancer. Your liver, of course, doesn't like it. Your liver not only converts poisons to harmless substances you can excrete, it also makes your platelets, so your blood can clot. It makes albumin, a protein that's essentially for keeping water in your blood vessels and not letting it leach into your tissues. So people who are dying of liver failure are in pain and weak and tired and sad the whole fucking time! And the only solution, a liver transplant, will come with a lifetime of medication and specialist check-ups and the knowledge that if you fuck up and kill this liver, too, no one is going to be eager to give you another try.

I don't guilt-trip my alcoholic patients with liver disease. I don't guilt-trip my smokers with COPD. They chose to cope with substances for reasons, even if I disagree with their reasons, even if those reasons are opaque to me. They will suffer the natural consequences of those actions whether I guilt-trip them or not. I want them to continue to see me, I want them to be honest with me. Other people will lay enough guilt on them. And nothing I can say or do would ever compare to the physical and mental suffering that goes with those diseases.

But if you can prevent these diseases in yourself, prevent them. Quit smoking. Do it now. Your lungs are going to look better starting almost immediately, with positive changes continuing for many years. Drink less alcohol. Sure, it's fun, sure, it's a longstanding human tradition, but it is also unfortunately a straight up poison and your body knows that no matter how persuasively you argue about the obvious failure of Prohibition. You can't argue with a cell. You can't convince your kidneys that high blood pressure shouldn't damage them. They are a system; they do what they do; they existed long before prefrontal cortex existed to justify what we want to do but know to be harmful.



[tesalicious2]

Kit Fisto's Scuba Troopers

Lets go! (halfway through this became OC time)

Monnk was reconditioned once when he was 3 standard because Dred Priest was trying to get at the Mandalorian training Monnk (they were basically father and son, the Mandalorian giving Monnk his name and his sea dragon on his armor)

He was a very playful and joyful child until the reconditioning, the old personality is still there but is rarely shown anymore

After Monnks reconditioning, he didn't remember how to do anything so all of his fellow CCs and Scuba troopers retaught him so he doesn't fall behind, thanks to them he wasn't decommisioned

Kit Fisto had an incredibly hard time reading Monnk at first, feeling a blank wall in the Force but flickers of brightness

Kit's playful attitude when off duty helped bring out some of Monnk's old personality and Monnk will now crack smiles and make the occasional joke

Kit finds out abut the reconditioning after a hard battle that ended with Monnk in the bacta tank and it was marked in his file

The Scuba Troopers mostly take after Monnk's old personalility, being very playful and pranks are common in the Acclimator

Though, they can get serious very quickly and they are masters at fighting underwater

They have an extra set of armor, they underwater gear, while also having to maintain their snow, sand, and regular gear

Their CMO, Plague, known for treating infections and his harsh and constant anger. Do not make him mad or play any pranks in his Medbay. He is apart of the scariest batch of medics to come out of Kamino

He has/can/will scream at his patients (including generals)

(These include Sacrifice of the 104th, Agony of the Corries, Reaper of the Marine Corps, and Suffering of the 327th. They were one of the first batches of medics and the original Mandalorian Trainer was very hands on. Their attitude comes from her, she adores them the most.)

When meeting his batch, Plague is much more chill and can be seen smiling

If you want to get on his good side, you get one chance (your first visit that isnt the standard 'this is the medbay, i'm here to help')

If you come in on your own and are honest about what happened he will treat you nicely (no screaming, just silent treating of injuries)

If you had to be dragged in, complain, down play your injuries, don't say all of them, try to worm out, make excuses, lie about why you're there, kiss his ass (not so much but this is usually accompanied by any previous thing on this list), or he finds you before you come to him, you've lost and no longer get his good graces

so far, only one shiny has his good graces and is absolutely his favorite

Cancer was a fresh off Kamino shiny who was quiet and clearly uncomfortable with his batchmates being in another battalion. He came in two weeks after picking him up with a freshly bleeding slice in his face from where he fell in the mess and cut himself of a bench corner

He was warned against going to the med bay but went alone, Plague found something in his chest when they met (affection?) and was taken in by the shiny apologizing and explaining what happened. Cancer made no fuss and listened very well, when Plague checked on him in a week, his injury was gone!

Cancer made Plague speechless and ten minutes later Cancer was changed to a medic track with a new Ori'vod

Cancer excelled in the medic track and quickly took after Plague, however he didn't have his anger instead doing the "you're dissapointing me, i thought you were better than that" mixed with baby sad eyes which is somehow worse

Originally his name was Fungus (dubbed by others), because he grew on Plague quickly. Plague offered the name Cancer to which the newly dubbed Cancer hugged Plague

Plague moved Cancer to his room, since as CMO he gets private quarters

Cancer is completely aware of the favoritism and totally takes advantage (he may be a shiny, but Plague has taught him to guilt trip so hard.)

Plague has introduced Cancer to his batch and they adore him, Cancer became the most untouchable clone in the whole army

Due to the nature of their battalion, the medics can fix simple injuries and surgeries underwater and their belts have cloth loops to slide medical tools into

The ARCs can't wear their kamas or pauldrons underwater so their armor is painted to mimic the shapes of them, made up of swirls or wavy lines, their normal gear does have kamas and pauldrons

Kit is very bad at picking who to make ARCs because if he had his way, everyone would get the training

To make up for this, the ARCs teach much of what they learn to the regular troopers, though they are all rather adept at adapting to fit the situation

It is common for Kit’s ship to be covered in shells, dead coral, animal bones, and shiny rocks

All of the troopers have some love for the water and the species in them and after the war, many choose to become marine scientists, dive instructors, or underwater cinematographers

[omgcatboi]

( someone requested I put this in its own post to reblog )

A guide of do's and don'ts for male feedees interacting with female ( or any ) feeders , incase you aren't sure

( as an autistic man, I understand how to explain this to you as I also struggle with being social ) !!

Don't:

Steer the conversation back to kink talk. If she's changing the subject, it's best to assume she isn't feeling the chat. So don't push it !! Spend a few minutes to chat like normal. You'll be surprised when you realize that these sweet feeders have a personality. You should show that you have one, too !!

Assume she owes you a response. Hey, guess what? People have lives !! Some feeder girls may be in uni / collage taking classes while also working two jobs. Or some may just have work, some may have kids, some may exist and have priorities and responsibilities !! She doesn't owe you a reply AT ALL !! Be patient and practice boundaries. You're acting co-dependant to a stranger and it's very off-putting ☹️ ( also you AREN'T ENTITLED TO KNOW WHY SHE DIDN'T REPLY!! That is no longer kink related and is asking about her personal private life. This is the internet!! For safety, she may not feel comfortable sharing that info. )

Dm her unsolicited pics, sexual dms, or fantasies! She may not be in the mood for that !! Or, she may not want to see that from you. Look, people can decide who they talk to and don't talk to. There's going to be a lot of people out there who don't wanna talk with you or don't vibe with you. It's life ! There's quite a few feeder blogs I've dmed and gotten no response from. It's life ! So what ! There's plenty of people to talk to on this site.

Immediately get sexual or flirty without consent ( also don't ask too early on ! It's kinda wierd and objectifying 😥 ) these are girls with whole ass feelings and emotions man.

Reach out with sexual intentions being your ONLY intentions. Again, this is a PERSON you're talking to. You wouldn't like it very much if some dude only dmed you for sex and didn't actually care about talking with you.

Block evade. If a feeder blocks you, don't make another tumblr account just to ask them why. If you don't know them, then they don't owe you a reason why. If you were very close to them, I know it's hard but you should let them go. If it's meant to be, they'll come back. Don't harass them.

Do:

Small talk ! Ask how they are, ask if they boil or fry their hotdogs ( and worship them for being right about fried being the superior option) ! Show actual interest in them !! You guys are MISSING OUT MAN ! Girls like these usually have so much personality it's addicting ! I mean you'd fall head over heels for these ladies, if you actually gave them a chance. Don't assume they're boring outside of kink !! ( Also by fall ' head over heels ' for them I mean you will adore them platonically ( with Maybe a crush ) do not expect dating out these girls. Most are taken and others probably get asked to online date by 10 other feeders a day. Just make some friends for once ! Not everything has to be about dating !!

Allow space for talk about hobbies outside of kink ! Into DND? What if she is, too!? Talk about it !

Give them space ! They get loads of dms a day, and also probably have limited free time for this place. So don't smother them !! You'll drain them if you act clingy, and make her want to leave.

Stay healthy. Don't be a negative Nancy. If things aren't going your way in the convo then don't guilt trip her. That's a dick move.

This was a pretty basic list and I'm as high as the cost of living still. So i probably forgot a lot. Anyway, this very Basic guide is a good tool to save and check if you need to. Drink your respect women juice.

[instantartific]

For the lovesick event, could we get Nova with "Shouldn’t you be spending more time with me?" Feels very him tbh lol

|ও DJ SUBATOMIC SUPERNOVA: "Shouldn't you be spending more time with me?"

587 words |

contains heavy themes of manipulation, themes that can be read as gaslighting, themes that can be read as coercion, heavy themes of forced isolation. |

Going for my heart with the first request being Nova. Anyways, I like the thought of a Nova that tries to guilt-trip you into only ever thinking about him and this would be part of the descent into that. Hope you enjoy! |

✧

It starts sweeter this time.

A better word may be gentle.

Soft phrases, words close to hushed pleas, fluttering across the room. They take so, so much care in delivering each vowel in dowries laced with silk. It's difficult to resist.

"While it grates me to no end to sound childish, it really doesn't seem fair for you to do this to me."

But you know him.

You know this changes, in late-night calls like this, where he only wanted a sliver more of your time.

As sleep tinges your senses with an off numbing hue, the words grow oh so colder. They grow oh so thin. They truly give his name such an apt meaning.

And he's only being patient.

"When I do try to make enough time for us to make plans, you want to cancel. Because of—what? What is it this time?"

You also know it wouldn't have mattered what you said.

Friends are irrelevant, you can simply reschedule for some other time that isn't already his. Which is understandable. It's wrong to promise someone your time when... you could've sworn you had no plans that day. He's chided you more than once for being oblivious to your own schedule.

Work is really quite trivial when someone with his degree of prestige offers to cover about any expense you wish, with minimal exceptions. He's mentioned in the past that housing falls right within his capabilities. It's truly a wonderful offer.

Family are clearly important to most, but don't they become too overbearing over time? You're not a child anymore. You don't need to be checked up on every interval they please. Besides, some get-togethers would really go better over the phone rather than going through all that trouble, wouldn't they? And at that, while it is a sad reality, certain relatives really only care about the status you have as their, well—relative. They don't even know you anymore, do they? You aren't the little one you used to be or the one they want you to be, and if they cannot accept that, then perhaps some distance is necessary.

So there really should be no excuse unless you don't want to spend time with him.

And you think that's the case, he cannot—he will not allow you to continue to socialize with whoever keeps poisoning your mind.

"I'll make this as easy as possible. You are going to arrive here in the next..." A slow, dragging sigh echoes through the reciever. He muttered bitter nothings too low to hear. But you can tell what they meant: you've made another mistake. "Two hours should be sufficient time for you to get your belongings together, should it not?"

Your final mistake.

"Don't act like you don't understand. You're smart enough to know that both in- and improper- action has as much consequence as action would. However, you're simultaneously distracted enough to continuously fail to manage your time and efforts properly. I'm giving you the opportunity to be distracted no longer. I'm sure you realize that, don't you?"

... As heavy as the lack of sleep weighs on your mind, perhaps this would be best. Less awkward reservations. Less irritating work hours. Less people who don't know you.

He's being generous. He's only worrying.

You know that, too.

So much so that it's difficult to refuse as his voice lulls into that near-heavenly tune, and he helps walk you through the most logical way to pack your things.

[lunaraindrop]

I'm mad.

I'm frustrated.

I'm sad.

I'm feeling guilty, selfish, and like the bad guy.

I don't get summers off. I might be a preschool teacher, but my school has a summer program. If I don't work in the summer, I don't get paid in the summer. I have bills to pay, and I need to eat.

My weekends were already sacred, and already encroached upon by my family and their extroverted need to be in each other's business constantly. I already had to turn down an out of town party and a cookout for Friday. (My mother tried to guilt trip me into going to the party with her, and only let up when I said I had to work late. In her words, "I don't like to go to things alone") Yesterday, I slept in (yay), but got roped into helping cook and eating family dinner at my aunt's (not yay).

Today was going to be all for me. I have summer lesson plans to write up. I have a classroom to start planning out for the school year. I have fics I want to write and work on. I just want to get a chai and find a cool, shady place outside of my house to write.

Instead...my dad has called me six times since 8:00am. All to do with his refrigerator.

*He wanted to come up and bring me his frozen chicken

*He wanted me to check my refrigerator to see if it has a temperature gage

*He called again to ask if my refrigerator had a temperature gage, what it was set up as, and how he should set his up

*He called me because he couldn't get ahold of my mother

*He called to see if I was awake and would be home when he brought the frozen chicken over (but did not tell me when he planned to bring the chicken over)

*He "accidentally" called me when he tried to call my cousin, but also wanted to talk about his refrigerator and how my mother was not answering her phone (they are divorced)

What this tells me is that my dad, once again, is not taking his anxiety medication like he should. He gets fixated on small things, like his refrigerator being "too cold". If you don't engage with him or go against what he is saying, he gets extremely agitated and yells.

So, I went over to my mother to tell her about his mood...only to find out that her phone was ringing.

Something you, my lovely people reading this, shoukd know is that mother is progressively becoming more and more HoH every day. It is one of the reasons she constantly wants me to be around. She does not know ASL, or plans to learn it. Her job has offered to pay for her to get an hearing aid, but her pride won't let her do it.

Another thing you might need to know is that I have had multiple talks with my family about how I am not the family answering service. I am not their GPS. If you can't find or get ahold of someone...try them again. Don't call me to find them or give them a message, unless it is an emergency.

I have wondered why lately I have been getting more calls dot those reasons.

...

My mother had her phone in her purse, in the other room. Far away in the other room.

On purpose.

I could tell when I brought it to her. She looked like a child that had been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. She knows she can't hear her phone when it is a couple of feet away. It is *impossible* when it is in her purse. And my mother is a smoker. She always keeps her cigarettes in her purse, and said purse near her to go outside to smoke.

"Oh Luna, nobody ever calls me."

I had to stress, again, that Yes. They. Do! And when they can't get her, they call me! So stop *hiding* your phone, please.

She answered, and it was my dad. Talking about his refrigerator. I said to her that he was having an episode and not taking his anxiety medication again. She blew me off and told me I needed to be more sympathetic. I said that it isn't about sympathy. I take the calls. I walk him through things. I am patient. I am kind. But something is wrong, and I don't want to be responsible for his anxiety all day. She says that I'm not responsible for him and...

Let's think, folks.

If I left to go do the things that I needed/wanted to do...both of my parents would try and blow up my phone, angry.

Why did I leave? Why didn't I act as a buffer for them? Why didn't I act as my mother's interpreter? Why didn't I help my dad figure out what to do with his refrigerator? While didn't I keep everyone calm and redirected?

Why didn't I sit there, silent, until I was needed?

And in all of this...I feel responsible. I feel guilty. I feel like a bad daughter.

But, like, fuck. Why can't my parents take care of themselves? Why am I expected to be my mother's hearing aid? Why am I expected to be my father's anxiety medication?

Is that all I am?

EDIT:

An update of sorts. My dad came up and gave me the frozen chicken. He said he was going to go home and take a nap. I told him that I would probably go work on lesson plans, then maybe go by the school to organize things for the upcoming week.

I left the house.

I went to Starbucks to work on my lesson plans (*cough*andwritefic*cough*)

And...my dad called. Asked me what I was doing. Remember, I *told* him what I planned to do today.

I said I was at Starbucks.

"You're at Starbucks? Well, nobody wants to do anything with *me* anymore."

I know it is his anxiety talking. I know he is going to go into a yelling fit about how people (me) don't love him or want him around unless he is paying for something.

Let's make it clear. I make it a point that he doesn't pay for anything for me, purely for the reason that I can say, "I love you and never ask you to pay for anything. I even paid for your coffee when we went out yesterday. Are you doing okay? Are you taking your medicine?"

I wasn't coddling or soft with him today. I didn't give him any reassurances. I didn't give him a chance to to drag me into an anxiety fueled blame-match. Instead, I flatly said, "I am working on my lesson plans. I don't have time to work on my lesson plans anymore. I need to work on them right now." and left it at that.

He paused, then said that he would talk to me later.

I wish it was that he realized that I wasn't purposely trying to not spend time with him (even though I saw him earlier, and he said he was go home to take a nap). But...no. That is the sad part of having parents with mental illness. When he isn't taking his medication like he should, he gets so paranoid. It won't matter that I am doing work. I didn't tell him where I was going. I went alone. I didn't invite him to go with me.

[ramzawrites]

Hey, so I'm having a really rough time rn (dealing with bs from my friend group, we have to take my really old dog to the vet today bc we found blood in her pee and we're scared that she won't make it this time, I'm struggling with my mental health, I'm just kinda goin thru it rn ig) so I would love a comfort fic with the sbi maybe with the reader as their sibling where the reader is the one that always comforts the fam, but hides their emotions until (1/2, very sorry about splitting it)

(2/2) something happens that makes the reader have a full on breakdown? I'll leave the rest to you, it can be a good or bad ending, headcanons or one shots, anything. You can ignore this request if you want/if it makes you uncomfortable. Please don't feel pressured/guilt tripped to write anything from this, your mental health comes first and I'm sure you're already really busy. Reminder to eat something today if you haven't yet and get a drink of water <3

We are family - Reader and SBI!Brothers

GN

Pairings: none

Characters included: Wilbur, Technoblade, Tommy, (mentioned) Niki, (mentioned) Schlatt

Warnings: n/a

Series: a request <3

Summary: Y/N came back from an errand and surprises their brothers with their weird behavior. Trying to put on their usual smile, trying to hide away their real emotions but their brothers know them better than they inititally suspected. They could immediately tell that something must have happened.

Words count: 2060

Authors Note: I’m so sorry this took so long! I hope you and your dog are doing better! 💙 I wish I could give you more than words of encouragement and that I managed to get faster to this request, I apologize Please make sure to take care of yourself, alright? Take time for yourself to deal with the stress and anxiety! Make sure to stay hydrated and remember to eat! Even if it’s just something small!

Once again I apologize for the long wait, I felt really bad already and then I kinda put it off because I felt bad.

adhd hit hard again and haven’t checked for typos yet, but will get on it as soon as I can o7

On another note if you want to read another comfort fic; I have a small series called “A Painful Reminder” which is more angsty but the 2nd part is more about the comfort, if that is something for you 

Living in the SMP was chaotic, turbulent and at times downright painful.

Most people tended to gravitate to one cause or other people to deal with this. Holding on to something so they don’t get pulled under. Get buried beneath the chaos and the violence.

So having people like Y/N around was like a godsend. They were one of the few people that seemed to be able to withstand the constant waves of misfortune and stand strong. Be the rock to hold onto when everything got too overwhelming.

Wilbur, Technoblade and Tommy loved their sibling for it.

After Wilbur and Tommy got exiled with Y/N out of L’Manberg, they were there and cheered both of their siblings up. Immediately making plans on how to set up a safe home and collecting ideas on how to get back. They were the one who managed to get a message out to Technoblade and asked him to visit them. Maybe help them.

Wilbur often jokingly said that Y/N was the glue that held the family together, to which they would always reply with the warmest of smiles “I’m glad.”

And what he said was true. Whenever the family fell on hard times and they began to drift apart it was Y/N who pulled all of them back. Pulling them back to reality and giving solutions for their problems if needed.

Sitting down with Wilbur when things got to much. Listening to his thoughts and worries, letting his emotion run freely without judgement. While they looked worried for him, their comforting smile never faltered. Offering him solutions to problems if he wanted it, otherwise they gave him the chance to just air his own thoughts out. To be angry with him. Sad with him.

Working with Tommy on his own projects. Listening to his ideas and giving him a different perspective that could improve some things but also respecting it when Tommy wanted to do this his way. And while he liked to brag and pretend that some things didn’t hit him that hard, they were still patiently listening to him as he spoke about his own pain in a more roundabout way. Telling him that he was not alone and making him feel heard.

Talking to Technoblade whenever the voices got too loud or out of hand again. He would just walk over to them and nudge them away, asking them to talk about something, no matter what. He just needed to hear their voice and be able to concentrate on it. Tune out the garbled voices in his head with a familiar sound that calmed him down no matter what. Leaning against them, slowly falling asleep as Y/N told all about how they were happily working on their own farm and what shenanigans they got up to.

Y/N really was like the warm sun on a cold day. Warming them up and protecting them.

Yes, Y/N was strong. So strong that even Technoblade considered them stronger than him. Maybe not physically but mentally and emotionally.

A clanging of metal rung through the cave. Techno was training with Wilbur while Tommy was just watching. Cheering on Techno.

It wasn’t an unusual situation and something Y/N expected to see as they made their way down the staircase. Wilbur in full iron armor and weapon while Techno just fought back with his own iron sword.

“Hey, Y/N! Welcome back!” Wilbur breathed out. Sweat running down the side of his face as he stopped attacking his brother.

The three men looked happily over to their sibling who slowly walked towards them but soon their expressions fell. Something was off about Y/N and it confused the three.

Their smile was as always plastered on their face but it looked strained. Their eyes wide open, trying to look sincere and loving but the glassy look of them gave off a different picture.

“Y/N? You okay?” Tommy asked as he stood up from the ground. Taking a step closer to them which made them in return stop in their tracks.

Y/N was hugging themself, shakily opening up their mouth to answer but nothing came out. It was then when Techno got very aware of how they were shaking in general.

This all seemed so wrong. This shouldn’t be possible. It just didn’t seem to register fully inside their minds.

Wilbur made sure to get rid off his sword and armor as fast as he could, walking over to his sibling, trying to get a better look at them but they just avoided his gaze.

Staring at the ground, slowly shaking their head “It’s- It’s fine. I’m fine.”

“You aren’t. You really aren’t. What happened? Did they find you?” Techno asked, his voice full with worry. A bit of anger hidden as well.

Y/N had their own little farm in order to support Pogtopia. The potatoes from Techno were great but variety is important after all. Though they also had an abundance of wheat they usually tried to smuggle into Manberg for Niki. Trying to help her out as much as possible with her taxes and work.

This time Y/N nodded “They did… It’s fine though. I’m fine. I’m not hurt. It’s all good.”

Wilbur’s frown deepened “Usually when people have to be so adamant about being okay something isn’t alright.”

Tommy nodded, supporting his statement only to whisper to himself “Adamant? What does-“

But Wilbur continued “We are your family, talk to us.”

Y/N licked their chapped lips “I’m-“

The tears finally escaped their eyes and begun streaming down their face. Sobbing they fell down on the ground. Wilbur immediately followed suit, laying his arm around them and pulling them against his chest. His hand flew up to their head and begun going through their hair, trying to calm them down. Humming a soft tune from their childhood.

It was the first time in their lives they saw Y/N break down like that and it was quite frankly shocking.

Unsure what to do with himself Tommy squatted down “Um, uh, what- what happened?”

Techno was still gripping the iron sword in his hand. Pacing up and down. Manberg found them? What the hell did they do to make Y/N break down like that? His own sibling! Whatever it was he would make sure to pay it back a thousand times over.

“Tommy can you grab them some water?” Wilbur laid his chin on top of Y/N’s head, rubbing circles now on their back.

He didn’t even hesitate, jumping up to run towards one of the chests with food items that Y/N had always ready for them. Grabbing a water bottle and running back over. Happy that he could do something else besides staring.

Tommy then pushed the bottle towards Y/N who gratefully took it, putting some space between them and Wilbur as they drank some of the cold liquid which helped them to calm down.

“You ready to tell us what happened?” Techno stopped pacing around. His gaze purely trained on his crying sibling. Anger still rising in him just like the voices.

Screaming things like “Technosib! How dare they hurt them! Protect them! I love Y/N so much! Why would anyone hurt Y/N! They always help us! Let’s help them for a change! Technosib! Let’s go out and fight them! Yeah! Blood for the Blood God and Y/N!”

Y/N’s voice was still wavering and a bit scratchy from their sobbing as they begun speaking “Hey, hey! Techno don’t concentrate on the voices. Listen to me. It’s all good.”

This somehow made Techno angry. He threw the sword away and finally knelt down next to them as well so his face was on the same eye level as theirs “Stop. Please. Stop thinking about us for one second. Stop trying to not make us uncomfortable or worried! Tell us what happened! Please.”

He was basically begging at the last part. All his worry packed into it.

“Yeah, honestly you trying to make sure everything is okay for us makes us even more worried.” It surprised the others a bit that this came from Tommy but he was correct.

Tears fell down their face again “I- I was just delivering more wheat to Niki and someone must have followed me. They followed me back to my farm and- and- they burned my fields down. There were explosions. I- it was just my farm. I did not harm. Just, why does it always have to end like this. Why do all the good things always end like this. Why can’t this place let something be. There is always something.”

The farm was so important to Y/N. It was their little project they put so much sweat, love and work into. It was their home away from home. A place to retreat and enjoy some peace. This obviously was devastating. It was their one thing they had for themself. The one thing that wasn’t there for anyone else but them.

It was also clear that this seemed to be the straw that broke the camel’s back and it broke the three a bit that they only now seemed to notice this. That it took that long and their whole farm being destroyed for the realize this was heartbreaking.

“Who?” Techno urged but Y/N shook their head.

“I don’t know. Everything went so fast and I tried to save as much as I could but- but it’s all gone. It’s all gone.” Their voice jumped up an octave at the end, burying their face against Wilbur’s shoulder again. Silently sobbing.

It should have been impossible but Wilbur’s frown deepened and his expression turned more grim “Don’t worry. We will get back at them. We will get our revenge. They will see firsthand what they did to you, I promise.”

Shocked Y/N looked up, their red and puffy eyes wide open “Wil, that’s not what I- no revenge. There is already too much misery going around I just want this to stop. I just want all of us being able to live in peace.”

Wilbur should have known that Y/N was too good natured for that but he couldn’t help himself. He was just so angry. Angry at Schlatt and Manberg. That they went for him was one thing but to go out of their way to treat Y/N like this? Let’s just say he put it on the list in bold letters with reasonings on why he will get back at the Manberg faction.

“Listen Y/N.” Techno begun, his voice now calm again “Stop it. Just for once think about yourself. Stop thinking about others for once. You are also worthy of the same care you give us. Let us at least help rebuild your farm. You always help us with our projects, let us help you with yours.”

Tommy seemed to lit up at that “That sounds like a good idea! We could build towers around your new farm and make sure no one gets in! We could put down traps and all!”

He really wasn’t sure how to react but that was at least something he could do for them. As the past General’s right hand man, this should be something he can do. If he couldn’t protect his sibling how could he ever hope to get L’Manberg back.

Wilbur seemed to think about it for a bit but agreed “Yeah, how does that sound?” Though the dark glint in his eyes stayed. The cogs in head still running off with his own thoughts.

“You guys would? Since when can you guys build?” a dry laugh escaped them but it was a laugh nonetheless.

Both Tommy and Wilbur looked almost appalled at that claim while Techno just shrugged and nodded. Just looking around Pogtopia was more functioning than good looking after all. Y/N tried to pretty it up a bit but usually something always happened around here.

“Also Y/N, please talk to us more. Don’t bottle everything up. Please. We worry a lot about you and we love you. You always do so much for us, let us do the same.” Wilbur pushed Y/N a bit off of him and looked them deep into their eyes, hoping that this would really hammer in that this was a genuine plea.

As a respone Y/N wiped the tears off their face “I understand. I’ll try to remember that.”

“Don’t try just do it.”

[amaya-chwan]

Takeaways from Therapy Game Restart 14 + Illustration Book Release Date

Hello again everyone! ❤️💛💜

It's finally here... chapter 14! In all its glory! 😍🥰✨

Before we get to our takeaways, just some news I missed in the last post!

🎉 SENSEI'S ILLUSTRATION BOOK WILL BE RELEASED AROUND THURSDAY, 23RD SEPTEMBER! 🎉

Image taken from this Twitter post from Dear+!

It is titled "日ノ原巡イラスト集　DARLING" and boasts a collection of illustrations from Sensei's works so far: Secret XXX, Therapy Game, and Kamisama no Uroko.

The current price is ¥2970 with tax (¥2700 without tax). If you'd like to preorder it on your proxy shopping service, I've found it on the Comi Comi Studios website here! The bonus for purchasing it on this website is a B5 clear file~ I haven't seen it on Animate just yet, so fingers crossed it'll appear on their website soon with another (different) bonus! ❤️💛

Alright, with this amazing news done, let's move onto our takeaways, the long awaited takeaways! Thank you for being so patient with me! 💜

My short life update: currently in week 8 of lockdown and I haven't left my house in a long time other than for exercise or groceries. But I do have my vaccination appointment booked so YAY! 🎉

Here are our takeaways for this chapter:

Oh man, we pick right up from the last page of chapter 13. MINATO, BB, YOU LOOK SO PAINED! 😭

Sensei is the BIGGEST tease... that's all we got of that Minato and Shizuma scene...👀😭

The female staff at the veterinary hospital have really mellowed out! They're not bad, after all. ☺️

Oh dear, Nakajou-sensei, please get better ASAP!

Whoa... did Onodera just...?? I'm starting to think back to that Onodera discussion we had a couple of months ago... 🤔

Poor Shizuma, always roped into Onodera's workplace stuff! IT'S BECAUSE YOU HAVE GREAT PEOPLE SKILLS, SHIZUMA! PROUD OF YOU! 😍🙌

Man, Onodera has a really... blunt way of saying things to her human clients. Wow, brave. 😲

But I will say, Onodera really is good with animals. 🙌

Yet again, I think about that Onodera discussion we had... 🤔🤔

And that’s it for this chapter’s takeaways! For a more detailed breakdown/summary of this chapter, please continue after the cut! There may or may not be a surprise scene (or two) there. Please keep reading if you want to see~  😉✨

Our chapter begins where we left off in chapter 13--Minato pinning Shizuma down on the bed. Shizuma looks up at Minato and reflects on his actions that caused the pained look he is seeing.

Image taken from this Dear+ Twitter post!

On the next page (title page), the dialogue reads: Shizuma wants to understand what it is about his director (Onodera) that is making Minato uneasy. // However, that beautiful liar hides it well...

(I believe we are taken back to the morning before Shizuma and Minato meet up for their date.)

The title page features Onodera walking back to the clinic, bread in hand, with a cat cozying up on her leg. We are then brought to the clinic's lunchroom, with the female staff and Shizuma on break. The roster in the room shows that Onodera is extremely busy, Nakajou-sensei has afternoon house call appointments, Tatsumi is Nakajou-sensei's support for these appointments, and Shizuma has a half day and finishes in the afternoon in lieu of working on his scheduled day off.

Shizuma asks his coworkers what presents they like from their partners and takes note of their answers. One of the female nurses asks if it's Minato's birthday. Shizuma confesses that their relationship has been affected by the various things happening lately, so he wants to get Minato a gift before seeing him later that day.

The nurses quickly pick up that the gift is a "tribute" of sorts as this line of work means a lot of missed appointments and dates, and Shizuma confirms their suspicions. While the nurses realise male-male relationships and male-female relationships aren't that different in this aspect, everyone in the lunchroom is alerted to someone shouting Nakajou-sensei's name.

Shizuma and a nurse see Tatsumi with Nakajou-sensei, who has collapsed on the floor. While the staff are concerned about Nakajou's well-being, she brushes it off as a dizzy spell. Before they can help her up, Onodera sweeps her off her feet and carries Nakajou to her (Onodera's) office. While Nakajou asks Onodera to put her down out of sheer embarrassment, Shizuma and Tatsumi are in shock, with Tatsumi commenting on Onodera's manliness in that moment. One of the other nurses gently smacks Shizuma's shoulder and tells the two to grab a blanket and a drink for Nakajou.

In her office, Onodera asks Nakajou why she's been overworking herself to the point of collapsing. The nurse (who gave the gentle smack) very obviously hints to Onodera that it is her fault. As Nakajou calms the nurse by saying that's just how the director is, Tatsumi asks Nakajou about their afternoon appointments. She says she'll be fine to go after a little rest, but the nurse says she mustn't overexert herself.

After a few back and forths about who should go and the clients' needs/personality (picky about the vet, had a pet that doesn't like men, etc), Onodera says she will go. The nurses are shocked and reminisce about all the issues they've had when Onodera interacts with the owners. Tatsumi and Shizuma stand there, and can very clearly imagine those situations happening.

While Onodera rearranges and informs the nurses of the shift changes to accommodate Nakajou-sensei, Shizuma has a terrible premonition that unfortunately comes true: he is appointed as Onodera's support for the afternoon house calls.

Wearing a sulky expression, Shizuma packs the necessary equipment in Onodera's car and reminds her that he has a very important engagement that night that he cannot miss, and as such will leave immediately after the house call appointments are done. Onodera bursts his bubble, and tells him to give up on those plans while he can since this is the line of work he's chosen.

As Shizuma reads the client files, he questions Onodera on why he is her support when he's never attended to these clients before. While Onodera tells him that good coordination is important with a physician's support and that he's the only one she can rely on to give her an honest opinion and calm the clients, Shizuma realises that he's basically the mediator between her and the owners. She confirms that this is his strong point, has great expectations for him, and proceeds to drive. Shizuma then reads the patient files at lightning speed, realising there's a threatening 'something' that Minato has sensed, but that's just how the director is. He then vows to make it to their meeting tonight, no matter what.

The first three house calls, as expected, involve Onodera insulting and angering the owners--Onodera tells the first client that his insistence on seeing Nakajou rather than a 'young' director is having a negative effect on his pet who needs immediate medical care; Onodera offends the second client, inferring from their conversation that her pet's appearance is more important than the need to shave their fur and get an ultrasound done; Onodera accuses the third client of being irresponsible in caring for his exotic animals and asks for more effort on his part. In all three scenarios, Shizuma awkwardly smiles while trying to ease the tension.

The scene skips to Onodera and Shizuma arriving at their fourth and final house call for the day. Just as Onodera explains to Shizuma that she must check a whole host of things at house calls (and indirectly be too blunt about it with the owners), Shizuma asks her to consider the owner's feelings and change when and how she says things. She glares ahead in silence, and Shizuma is just glad that she is now aware of it. He again reminds her to talk with the owner nicely and gently as he probably won't be able to help with the next client as their pet dislikes men. Onodera tells him to just sit in the corner and witness the client become furious while he doesn't help, making him feel slightly guilty for saying that. He is now adament on not helping her.

They reach the owner's home and we meet an elderly woman named Shiratori and her 9-year-old male cat, Tono. Shiratori apologises to Shizuma as her cat doesn't like men. Tono hisses at them as Onodera opens his cage, but is then coaxed into submission by Onodera who covers his vision with a towel and takes him into her lap to calm down. Shiratori and Shizuma are surprised at his sudden docile nature, with Shizuma witnessing how well she deals with animals.

As Shizuma looks on at Onodera while she completes a check on Tono, he sees she is crumbling at the friendliness and talkative nature of Shiratori, who sings nothing but praise for Onodera and how her family must be proud to have such an amazing daughter. Aiming to ease her troubles and remembering the earlier guilt-trip she gave him, he redirects Shiratori's attention to her broken fly screen and offers to fix that plus everything else that needs repair in her home.

Onodera watches as the two leave the room for a bit before apologising to Tono for ignoring him. Tono looks on at Onodera happily while she asks him how he can live with such a lively human and to tell her his secret to this. She brings him into her arms once more to check his limbs, and as Tono looks up smiling at Onodera, Onodera sees her reflection in Tono's eyes, and both seem to realise something.

BG Text: Stare...

Suddenly, Shizuma and Shiratori, who are busy fixing the window, hear a loud crash and rush into the room to find Tono atop the cabinet and Onodera on the floor, with her hair in disarray. In the next panel, Tono is shown to be hiding in the bookshelf, looking on irritatingly at the humans. Shiratori apologises to Onodera, who shakes it off and says it's nothing to worry about and no harm's been done.

Shiratori asks if Onodera will fix/tie her hair up again, but when Onodera says her hair tie was broken when Tono used her as a launchpad to get on the cabinet, Shiratori runs to get her a new one. As Shiratori gushes over the 3 piece dopey looking character hair tie set she received as a present from her grandchild (and lets Onodera pick one), a greatly displeased look is plastered on Onodera's face. Shizuma, in shock, notices her displeasure and hopes she just thanks Shiratori for it. And Onodera does, bringing a great big smile to Shiratori's face.

As Onodera and Shizuma leave, Shiratori says she's glad to have talked with Onodera and invites her to come over again. As she says this, we see Onodera looking back with a blank look in her eyes.

And that’s it for this chapter! THANK YOU FOR READING THIS FAR! 💜 While I was surprised at the lack of Minato in this chapter (Sensei legit is such a tease, LOL 🤣), I'm happy we can learn more about Onodera. Ngl, I'm starting to really question if Onodera is male or female now, given what transpired in this chapter. I guess we shall see in the next one!

I also changed the formatting a bit and removed the bullet points. Please let me know which format is better/easier to read! Ahah!

EDIT: Spelling and grammar checks are done! Didn't change a lot, but hope it reads better! 💜

📢 As always, please support Hinohara-sensei by purchasing her books and CDs! 📢

And please also refrain from resharing these translations and images outside of this post! Thank you for understanding! ❤️💛

There won't be a chapter in next month's (September release) Dear+, so I shall see you in two months for the next chapter (Dear+ November Issue, to be released in October).

As always, stay safe during these turbulent times and look out for each other and for your loved ones! 💜❤️💛

[perdizzion]

I just happen to stumbled upon ur account and saw that you'll be quitting med school. I have a dilemma that I want to share with someone. Im a newly enrolled first yr med student and classes just started a week before. But I'm starting to form some doubts whether I really want to be a doctor or not. Its not that I cant handle the academics its just that do i really see myself being a doctor in the future and actually feel happy about it.

I dont even know if being a doctor is my dream anymore or just my parent’s.

Hiya! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me, anon! I don’t know if my answer will help you or not, but I will try to do my ABSOLUTE BEST to reply!!

Ok so. Med school. Tricky stuff. I’ll tell you a little bit about my background and what I’m up to right now to give you a Good Feel about how things are going after the decision I’ve taken and whatnot.

I got into med school about 4 and a half years ago, and like any student who worked their asses off for their desired universities’ entrance exams, I was beyond ecstatic when I found out that I had gotten in. I started attending lectures, group discussions, student projects, and for the first few years, I felt like hey, I think I can actually do this! The exams were pretty tough, I can’t say I liked pharmacology and neurology, but I passed just fine and so I thought that things were going to be fine.

[Narrator voice] things were, in fact, not fine.

I started having doubts around..3rd year, I think? Everything just started to become so dull no matter how much free time I was using to do my hobbies (drawing and doing art in general) and I think that was when my depression started to really rear its ugly head. I started to miss classes, isolate myself from my friends, stay in bed all day, and the only people that had kept me sane were my family and a few close friends of mine telling me to take care of myself when I was too depressed to do so. I tried thinking about whether I’ll be happy being a doctor in the future, and then I noticed that I couldn’t even imagine myself in a white coat, working in a clinic and talking to a patient.

This is when I finally realized that all this time, my wanting to go to med school wasn’t even because it was my dream. It was my parents’.

I struggled a lot to get through some of the days, but I managed to keep up the facade in front of my uni friends until I finished 4th year and received a “degree”. (In Indonesia, finishing 4th year of med school grants you a “bachelor of medicine” though you can’t really use it for anything yet until you’ve finished 2 more years of clerkship and get a “dr” in front of your name).

Clerkship happened after 4th year. If I had to use one word to describe clerkship, it would be hellish. I don’t know if this is how it works in every country, but in Indonesia, clerkship demands med students to attend hospital shifts with inhuman amount of working hours. We had to do 36 hour shifts every twice a week, and 9 hour shifts every other day. This might sound pretty light to some people, but it was super tough for me what with the amount of additional assignments and exams that we still had to do during our rotations. 

After 2 months of clerkship, my depression grew so much worse to the point where my best friend (bless her heart) had to call me almost everyday to help me sleep at night because the thoughts in my head wouldn’t leave me alone. Finally, I called my sister who lives in a different city to fly to where I was living in to take me to see a psychiatrist. It didn’t help because my doctor was super shitty about my condition (“all med students experience depression at one point because med school is just that hard, don’t worry, I’ve been there”) but I did take the meds. And I was planning to carry on with clerkship, until one day the meds gave me orthostatic hypotension (it was one of the side effects of the drug that I was taking) and I fainted in the middle of a surgery. When my mom (who lives in another city) found out about this, she was livid. She flew to my place right on that exact same day to take care of me, though she hadn’t known about my depression yet at the time.

The next day, I told her everything. Like, everything. About how med school had truly been stressing me out, about how I didn’t feel like med school was the right place for me anymore, about how clerkship had been making me feel like I was a worthless piece of shit because the doctors kept yelling at me, about how clerkship had also been making me realize that I wasn’t good with patients and that their lives are literally in my hands and that a single mistake could lead to their death and how I could never live with that much guilt in my life, about how I was so tired of being too sleep-deprived to properly function everyday, let alone to stitch a patient’s cut-up hand back together.

I told her that I wanted to quit. And so I did.

And you know what? It feels amazing.

I’ve been sleeping regularly for the past few months. I get to draw everyday now, and still make money out of doing commissions. I interact with my family a lot more and I don’t check up on them only when I need them to transfer me some money to buy food. I eat three meals a day like a normal human being and it feels so, so good. I applied for a scholarship so I could earn a Master’s degree in biomedicine abroad (it’s not art school, which is where I actually want to go to, but it’s not med school either so I’ll take it), I passed the first stage and now I’m just trying to do my best to pass the next two stages so I could get a full-ride. 

Things are okay. Things are good.

Things haven’t always been good, of course. People tell me that I was “so close to reaching my dreams!”, that my parents “must be so shattered to hear that you wanted to quit!”, that I am just “wasting away my potential.” My grandparents called me a disappointment a few weeks ago while telling me that I should just give up on my scholarship application and go back to med school. My dad told me that he wished I could “go back to the way I was and be happy again.” My mom cried multiple times. It hasn’t been easy on my mental health, but honestly? Fuck it. Fuck every single guilt-trip that my parents have had to put me through. Fuck everyone at uni who’s been spreading false rumors about how I quit med school because “I got cancer” or “I got knocked up.”

I absolutely hated how the doctors did anything back in the hospital. The rich patients got immediate treatment, and the poor got dismissed. The mentally ill were mocked behind closed doors, and med students were treated like trash. Rooted seniority where the senior doctors hazed junior doctors were still a thing (in Indonesia, at least). Literally everyone in the hospital had a superiority complex and I fucking hated it. Neither my parents nor my grandparents will have to be the ones to experience this on a daily basis for years though, so fuck outta here with your negative comments about my decision.

I quit med school because I did it for me, and only me.

This is by no means supposed to scare you away from med school just so you could jump into my bandwagon, heck no. I’m telling you this because nobody told me that this could be a possibility. Everybody I knew kept telling me that the only thing you’ll need to succeed med school is firm determination and hard work, and while that may be true for some people, I required a lot more than that, like a stable mental health, a good support system, etc. I failed to meet these requirements, and so everything turned into a shipwreck for me. My other friends, however, who were well-prepared with all of these, are managing to continue med school just fine.

That being said, this answer is definitely supposed to make you think about your decision more thoroughly. One of the most often things that people tell me post-med school is that “you should’ve quit earlier if you hadn’t liked it; it would’ve saved you a lot of time.” I hate the fact that I agree with this. If I had quit years ago, I would’ve still had time to search for a school that was more relevant to my interests and start over from a blank slate. If I had quit years ago, I would’ve been able to graduate from a new school and earn an actual proper job by now so I could help my parents out with our finance. Of course, my parents would’ve been way more harsh on me if I had told them that I wanted to quit so early on, but if you own the privilege of having parents that would genuinely and willingly listen to you, please talk about it with them. I had a friend who quit med school around a few months before 1st year ended; he’s in business school now and from what I’ve heard, he’s pretty happy with where he is right now.

Whew, that was long. I swear I didn’t mean for it to be this long!! Let me know if any of that helped or if you just want to talk off anon with me in general! I know firsthand how this kind of dilemma can eat you up whole, and it’s not a fun experience, so just hmu if you want to chat

Have a nice day!!