#i'm not supposed to be on at midnight but i'm so fuckin stressed!!! hhghh
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i fucking hate being nonbinary in a traumatized household!!!! actual hell!!!!!
#LONG-ASS rant in tag; and when i say long i mean LONG#ask to tag#for uhhhhhh... transphobia? and some other stuff but i'm. not sure what to put.#pitch rants#please do NOT reblog. unless you're talking to me directly-- that's fine#pitch vents#i'm not supposed to be on at midnight but i'm so fuckin stressed!!! hhghh#i came out to my mom and there was no ill will but GOD she doesn't know ANYTHING abt this and also GOD she has issues#even if i won the Parents Who Love Each Other lottery‚ i still got a mom with Parent Issues who also has fresh trauma from my sibling#so now she always thinks she's failed me!!! and it sucks!!!#what sucks even MORE is that she really wanted a little girl and she ALSO is very attatched to my deadname!!!!#anD HGGH DOES ANYONE IN THIS FUCKING HOUSE KNOW HOW TO TALK ABT E MOTIONAL STUFF WITHOUT MANIPULATION??#she isn't MEANING to but GOD it's SO frustrating!! I love her but she's so attached to her Little Girl#and on a subconscious level i still know it's not my fault for being nonbinary but on a conscious level it FUCKING SUUUCKKS#FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO CONVINCE HER TO GET A THERAPIST. PLEASE. OH MY GOD#can someone PLEASE fucking get me a time machine to tell myself that coming out of the closet is a BAD IDEA#because it'll cause a Hell Cyclone of Unaddressed Trauma from my mom#...god. ok. this wasn't supposed to be this long but anyway#pitch posts
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