#i'm never going to recover from milk-fed catamite as an insult istg

[hekateinhell]

Some people have asked for Captive Prince thoughts and I'm waiting until I finish the trilogy, but in the meantime, I did find the thread where I was livereacting my way through the first few chapters of Book 1 to my friends. And naturally, I fell into the trap of relating everything back to VC (it is what it is).

Every bit as coherent as you'd expect from me in a chat, RIP my besties.*

Cut for spoilers and also...

“We hear that your Prince,’ said Lady Jokaste, ‘keeps his own harem.” RIGHT OUT THE GATE

“This slave was more like a wild animal, nothing like the twenty-four tame kittens who lined the hall.” EXCUSE ME... tame kittens 🥹🥹

THE PRINCE ENJOYS A CHALLENGE LMAO I YELLED also me waiting for Nicaise so I can immediately get sad 🫠🫠🫠🫠

YOU HIT LIKE A MILK-FED CATAMITE

I'M WHEEZING I'm so scandalized what is happening

“I’m not desperate enough that I need to soil myself with filth,’ said Laurent.” LAURENT PLEASE it's giving Lestat tbh

“What’s your name, sweetheart?’ said Laurent, not quite pleasantly.” LMFAO OMGGG THE MOUTH ON LAURENT WHO TF IS THIS GUY 💀

“I imagine it would be a lot like lying down with a poisonous snake” Lestat on Armand TVL era

HE'S MAKING HIM CRAWL (imagine Armand doing that to Lestat 🥵)

mfw they're preparing him lmaooo okay laurent get it

“You really,’ said Laurent, ‘have no idea how happy that idea makes me. It’s perfect: a man who holds you down while he fucks you, with a cock like a bottle, and a beard like my uncle’s." I CAN'T... WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO WITH THIS?? 😭

“Laurent might talk like he’d been raised on the floor of a brothel” okay but this is not the EXACT SHIT Lestat would say about Armand

HOLD UP DAMEN KILLED THE BROTHER??? CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS PLEASE?????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“You look like a whore.’ The soft words barely stirred the air by Damen’s ear, inaudible to anyone else. Laurent murmured: ‘Filthy painted slut. Did you spread for my uncle the way you did for Kastor?”

You already know I'm taking dialogue notes for myself... filthy painted slut and thank you 😌

NICAISE!!! LMFAO HE JUST SPIT IN THAT MAN'S FACE LIKE A FERAL KITTEN I LOVE HIM!!!!! The bell!!!!!!!!!!! 🥹

“On the other hand, the aloof, untouched Laurent was at this moment delivering a precise treatise on cocksucking.” asjdksadjsask incredible

*the most salacious commentary has been edited or removed altogether for obvious reasons and will probably appear later in a VC porn drabble