#i'm literally rereading old smuts for inspo

[discojupiters]

why iS IT SO HARD TO FINISH THIS TORKSMITH SMUT GOD FUCKING DAMMIT

[maglors-anion-gap]

Friday, May, September for fic asks!

[from this ask game] friday - most self indulgent fic:

I think the most self-indulgent fic that I've written is actually one I haven't posted yet. I'm working on some tolkien secret santa advent calendar prompts (which I'll be releasing in the coming week-ish) that center on transmasc!russingon. It's not exactly a unique headcanon (arofili has some lovely transmasc content for them) but I'm transmasculine and it's something I enjoy. I actually wish more people would write trans narratives in fandom! Don't be hesitant! I've never seen someone totally screw the pooch (except out of deliberate malice); you'll do better than you expect the first time around; there are always people happy to answer questions. I know lots of people have steered clear of trans fic because some people have incredibly strong opinions about what is transphobic or not or what the best way to write a trans character is, and honestly, it's what kept me from wanting to write trans characters (and I'm trans!!! the irony). If you do some research, ask some questions, and engage in good faith, you're doing fine.

may - fic I regret posting:

eurgh. Um so I think I regret something about literally every fic I've written. Actually, even though I love russingon I have Major Anxieties about posting anything russingon. I'm not going to name names or link or anything bc I think gossip is pretty rude, but there was a piece of meta that went around maybe two years ago? It had a lot of insightful things to say (I actually wish I'd saved the link because it was pretty good), but at the end the op alleged that the fandom fixation on russingon was fetishistic. In general, accusations of fetishism made me really hesitant to write russingon because I really don't want hate in my inbox, and I was really scared I was playing into like, bad characterization or stereotypes or something? Which is so fucking stupid because I'm transmasc and I'm literally dating another man (fellas is it fetishistic to gay-love another dude?). But it gave me mega-gender-upset because the Age Old Internet Accusation that transmascs get hit with a lot is that we're basically just creepy "fujoshis" or whatever. I don't think that was op's intent but. Anyway, I wish people were more careful about how they turn their personal complaints ("fingon needs more characterization," or "I don't like fic drabbles that focus on maedhros' recovery in hithlum") and make them into sweeping claims about the state of fandom.

that was a long anxiety-dump to say I sometimes regret posting Where the Spirit Meets the Bones, which is the Bad Russingon Fan trifecta of Unholy Smut, Maedhros Man-Pain, and Taylor Swift lyric inspo.

september - comment that warms my heart:

I went through all my AO3 comments for this, there are so many lovely ones but the one that jumped out at me was something undercat said on Turning Shadows into Shapes: "I saw this linked again on tumblr a week ago or so and came back to reread this, and it's just as good as I remembered!"

I'm always happy when something I write withstands the test of a re-read :)

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