#i'm like - this is all SO much bigger than Lokius that i'm just embarrassed now
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another Loki spoiler post bc now I have different thoughts and this times its lokius thoughts
#so i'm writing a fic#('Another time champ' on AO3)#and as I'm watching this finale and see everything Loki goes through#and the stakes get bigger and bigger#and the philosophy gets deeper and deeper#i'm like - this is all SO much bigger than Lokius that i'm just embarrassed now#I'm the kinda writer where I want to stay as canon-compliant as possible#I want the story to fit neatly in the world and make sense in the tapestry of everything#so when they throw this existentially intense curveball at us#where Loki gives up his life as he knows it to become a kind of cosmic godking of time and the multiverse#I look at my little fic about a Loki variant and a TVA analyst falling in love and i'm like#who ordered this?#feels silly now#but then again I always considered the fic as a branched timeline#a timeline only made possible now bc of Loki's sacrifice :'(#there's gotta be a way for Loki to be Loki again right?#just a dude again#just a guy#a guy who loves a jet ski salesman variant#oh god - and don't get me started on that conversation he had with Mobius about burden#it hurts so much#Mobius not being able to prune the little boy.... always guilty for other hunters blood on his hands????#this is too much#I just need to lay down a while#it was just so much - so real - so emotional - so much at once!
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