#i'm just very emotional but i'm going to go back to my tunes now ig. wow i can't breathe from all the tears

[mindless-existence1]

Chapter Two of unnamed fic

Chapter One, Chapter There

Bakugo x GN!Reader fluff fic based off this audio

"How many men have you kissed?"

"Very few."

"But you offered me a kiss, why?"

"Such a foolish reason I'm afraid. I just wanted to kiss you." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Summery: You have practically latched onto Bakugo since the beginning of the school year. Why? Who knows.

Reader is very in tune with their emotions and speaks how they feel. Bakugo is the opposite. What a mix.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Content: Slow burn, romance, reader is flirty but they dont realize it kinda, y/n is used once, curse words, no pronouns mentioned but is kinda fem (not fem heavy tho just reader does more feminine stuff ig), it's fluff guys

Words: 1,174

Loud music filled the small dorm you and Bakugo were in. You mindlessly read through a manga on the others bed while he worked on his hero gauntlets. Bakugo had put on one of his favorite bands only too fond out you liked them to, this spurd on a talk that was more enjoyable then he care to admit.

Every once and a while bakugo would look up at you from where he sat on the floor. Your head bounced to the beat of the songs blasting through the speaker, he watched as your eyes skimmed the pages beneath you. Nimble fingers flipping the pages every few seconds.

The two of you had grabbed a snack from the kitchen together before heading to his dorm, the trash long forgotten in his bin. All that was left now was a soda sitting on Bakugos bed side table. A vibration from his pocket snapped him out of his daze, checking the caller ID he saw it was Kirishima.

With a groan and eye roll he begrudgingly picked up the phone. You curiously looked towards Bakugo, he mouthed Kirishimas name and you gave him a nod in return. Bakugo listened to the red head go on about needing the blonds help in his dorm.

Bakugo cursed under his breath but agreed non the les. After hanging up the teen pushed himself off the floor and made his way towards the door. "Shitty hair needs my help for something, I'll be back in a minute. Don't mess with any of my stuff you got it?" With a nod you waved off the young hero.

The red head needed help moving stuff around his dorm and needed his many friend to help. It had taken Bakugo longer than he wished, almost half an hour went by before he was heading back to his dorm.

When he walked through the door he was met with the sight of you splayed out on his bed, almost in the same position yiu were in when he left. What caught his eye was what you were wearing. It was one of his black skull shirts. You were practically drawing in the oversized clothing.

A mixture of annoyance, confusion, and an unknown feeling washed over the blond teen. "The fuck are you doing?" His voice wasn't as sharp as he intended, in fact is was a lot weaker. You looked good amazing in his clothes. No what? Katsuki Bakugo was not thinking that, he couldn't be.

The smile you had on your face when he came in contorted into confusion at his words. "Huh?" You looked at your friend in confusion. He scoffed in response, "The fuck you wearing my shirt for?" Understanding flooded your features when you looked down.

"Oh yeah. I spilled my drink and I didn't want to have to walk all the way back to my dorm soaked in soda so I thought I'd just put one of yours on." You explained like it was the most obvious things in the world. The longer you spoke the less Bakugo paid attention. More so focused on the way you looked lounging in his clothes.

The shirt was oversized sure, but the way you were laying made it accentuate you features in ways Bakugo hadn't noticed before. Sure he realized you were attractive but he didn't think about stuff like that, untill now at least. It took him a moment to realize he was staring untill h a looked towards your face riddled in confusion.

"Sorry if I did something wrong just our dorms are far apart and-" "It's fine."Bakugo practically blurted out his response, embarrassment seeped into his veins. He closed his eyes at his desperate voice, he hoped you didn't realize just how much this affected him.

"Oh good, you scared me for a second." You pause, thinking for a second before saying. "You know, this smells like you. Not to sound creepy but I like it." Your voice was soft and warm, like you truly meant everything you said. A deep red blush rose to his face and fortunately you either didn't notice or just didn't mention it. That familiar twisting in his gut signaled he needed to be alone.

He couldn't be around anyone, specifically you, when he was like this. What would you do if you realized how weak he got at a few of your sweet words. No one ever talked to him like that yet you did it so flawlessly it drove him crazy.

To Bakugos luck it was about time for dinner, at least for him since he went to sleep sp early. "Hey I-" he stumbled over his words, how was he supposed to ask you to leave when he wanted you to stay? "I'm going to get done dinner so-" you cut him off.

"Oh yeah you eat really early! I forgot sorry Bakugo." You began grabbing your things. Along with the still wet tee and you backpack. "Hey is it cool if I return this short to you tomorrow? I can wash it for you since I was the one that made it dirty." You chuckle a bit as you amke your way to the door.

Bakugo mumbles out a rushed string of "Yeah that's cool." As he moves out of your way to the door. You make it half way out the door before you are turning around with an excited, "Oh I forgot!"

Confusion floods Bakugos features as you grab your phone out your pocket. "Can I have your number?" Your words are blunt as you hand the blond your phone. His response is delayed from surprise but he still grabs the phone. "What why?" The confusion is real, no one had asked him for it before let alone so bluntly he wasn't sure how to react.

"Well for when I want to talk to you and I'm not, you know, around you." You explain to him so simply that he is grateful his hair has been growing out and it covers his now bright red ears. "Oh yeah right." You just beam brightly at him while he puts in his number practically on auto pilot.

"Thanks! I'll see you later Bakugo!" You call out to him as you make you way out the door and down the hallway. Bakugo waves slightly and goes back into his dimly lit dorm. He falls onto his bed and practically dies at the smell of you covering his sheets. He put his head in his hands for a moment before a ding from his phone makes his head perk up. The text reads:

Unknown Number: Hey its Y/n! Since it's the weekend tmr do you want to go to this new restaurant with me for dinner?

God Katsuki Bakugo cannot be this flustered by a dinner request. He types out a meek yes hoping his uncharacteristic nervousness doesn't transfer through his screen. The only thing he could think of was how much he actually did want to go on this...date.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Holy shit dude I just pumped out like 2,200 words so fast I don't know where this came from but it's currently 1 am so am going to snooze

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venus-xxoo

[iwanttofuckereh69]

now reading 2ha vol2

ch 46 - 55

(sorry its a bit long, i wanted to be... coherent... this time lol)

btw tell me how much suffering i should expect from vol 2. on the scale from papercut to getting my heart ripped out 😭

Ok so… That lake thing was wild. Or so i thought, before Chu Wanning TURNED INTO A FUCKING KID. Like what the hell? He is either adorable or absurdly scary, no in between. I'm loving this so far.

I looked at that illustration in the book when I first got it  and I was more than confused because I couldn’t tell who was who. And for a moment I legit was like Is Chu Wanning a child? But then I was like NAAAAH CAN’T BE. Welp. Here we are :)))))) 

1. TL;DR: Chu Wanning is a horny lonely loser (affectionate)

Chu Wanning and his dreams. I have a hunch it's somehow a glimpse into their previous life. No idea how it would occur but that scene seems like something that might have happened?

It seems rather interesting to me that THIS would be Chu Wanning's fantasy. I couldn’t help but wonder if it isn’t because that’s the only way he would allow himself the pleasure. Because ultimately he doesn’t get to have a choice in that scenario. It takes away the guilt of lusting over his disciple. So maybe that’s where it came from. And, moreover, this is Mo Ran who wants CWN. Wants him so badly he can’t contain himself. I just found it really interesting that of all scenarios, CWN dreams of that one. I don’t know why I kept thinking about it but here we are ig lol

Also, Mo Ran destroyed his golden core in his past life? Did I miss that in vol 1? Because ohh :c. Or it wasn't Mo Ran???  

2. TL;DR: I’m gonna get hurt so so so bad

Mo Ran smiled. “Yep. Cause I’m closest with you, and I know you’d never lie to me.” Shi Mei was still hesitant. “That’s true, but���”

Welp. Based on community’s reactions that’s gonna hurt like motherfucker. I fucking know that line is there for a reason. I fucking know it. The reason is to break my heart. And isn’t it like a second time Shi Mei says something about not lying to Mo Ran? I WONDER WHY. (i might have remembered it wrong tbh but this part is there and is tormenting me)

3. TL;DR: Mo Ran’s emotional intelligence is at most equal to emotional intelligence of a lettuce (one that’s been sitting in the back of your fridge for weeks because you forgot about it); Also, Shi Mei is sweet and kind and i don’t believe any of you anymore. He can’t hurt a soul. 

Mo Ran is very adamant on hating Chu Wanning. He wants to hate him. He needs to hate him. As if he was scared of the feelings that might be left if he does not hate him. That part is specifically in relation to his conversation with Shi Mei and how uncomfortable he’s gotten when Shi Mei started going on and on about how Chu Wanning isn’t really all that bad. 

And then that part with the umbrella happened and I really wish it was from Mo Ran’s perspective, because for the love of god I have no idea what his intentions are. It seemed like a really bad and failed flirting attempt. Like me when I asked this guy that was in a band in school to tune my guitar but it was in fact in tune and it was just embarrassing tbh But it could be just him trying to be nice for whatever reason  and CWN overreacting because he is strong and independent and he doesn't need (no man) anyone. 

I’m really puzzled at Mo Ran tho. And, like, that’s not a bad thing. There is this part of him that hates Chu Wanning with every fiber in his body. But he also admires him deeply as a teacher and maaaybe tiny bit as a person. There is both disdain and interest. Hatred and kindness. His whole (other) life it seems like he had this image of Chu Wanning that was coldblooded and ruthless. And i feel like it’s shattering now that he starts to notice how it wasn’t really the case. But still it’s hard for him to put those two pieces together so he really tries to choose one. It’s really telling when he can’t answer Shi Mei’s question ab if he dislikes Shizun.

ALSO SHI MEI IS SO SWEET AND KIND I DONT BELIEVE ANY OF YOU. HE CANT BE EVIL. He can't be evil... He can't...

4. I’m just wondering why the thing that happened at the lake (i don’t remember how it’s spelled so it’s going to be THE LAKE) was so different to how it went the first time MR was there. Basically the one major change he’s purposefully made was that he stole money from Rong Jiu and didn’t fall for his trap. Could it be somehow connected? Because otherwise the events should be the same unless something was changed. And the only thing i can think of right now that he influenced in major way, is that whole deal with Rong Jiu. The ghost marriage "arc" ended more or less the same, didn't it? I might be mixing shit up but oh well.

Also, I saw a post the other day in which op was talking how Mo Ran’s love for Chu Wanning was clear to them from the very beginning. Op said they don’t understand how others might not get it and since i’m the one that wasn’t that keen on the idea at first, i decided to elaborate a bit on points i made after first 20 chapters or so, this time trying not to be as much of a clown (hopefully).

Well, I’ve seen the title of the book and I know they're gonna end up together one way or another. But its complicated and messy and I would even go as far as to say that’s the point? And, ironically it's also in the title. A dog and a cat. At first glance they are so different it seems almost impossible for them to get along. At first glance Chu Wanning and Mo Ran felt too different to be able to get along as well. There was too much resentment and too much things left unsaid (and unnoticed). After reading only first 20 chapters i was told that 1. Chu Wanning is ruthless and cruel 2. Mo Ran hates him. 3. Mo Ran is horny for him. Only with time as I was reading further, it turned out that they both care for each other in ways they themselves have a hard time explaining. 

I also don’t think sexual attraction equals everlasting love. And like, the fact that Mo Ran doesn’t get hard at the sight of Shi Mei isn’t telling me anything about his feelings. Does he really love him too much to have a single impure thought about him? Or does he not realize he doesn’t like him that way? Does he love him platonically? I don’t know. I’m for sure lacking context in this situation. That’s the point. I want to read it with my mouth open agape as I get to know those characters more and as slowly my first impression changes. Right now, based on what i’ve been presented by the book I adore Mo Ran’s puppy love for Shi Mei. But as i’m on chapter 50, I see it as just that, a puppy love.  

I don’t want to argue who to ship, because that’s not the point im trying to make xD I just think my hesitation to picture CWN and MR together after first 20 chapters was not that weird. I know it will happen and i’m curious to see how long it will take those idiots to realize their feelings for eachother and express them. I know they are meant to be. But they themselves don’t know that yet. And it feels like they try their best to ruin every chance they get lol I’m also curious where those feelings come from. Why Mo Ran became so obsessed with CWN.

There is foreshadowing, there are those little and not so little things scattered across that slowly become more meaningful the more context you add on top of them. But those alone, in my opinion aren’t enough to be convinced with utmost certainty from page one that the main characters are in fact in love. It’s more complicated than that and that’s why I enjoy it a lot and i enjoy when the books makes me believe one thing to then make me realize it wasn't ever that simple. Am I making sense? Idk it's 1AM i want to go to sleep njkinrjgkn

[lizbethborden]

did you watch the new abbott ep? thoughts?

I did! I was kind of 50/50 on it. Sorry in advance for rambling LOL

I feel like the double episode format just... Really messed up the pacing. Way too much happened in way too little time, so there was nothing satisfying and the stakes didn't feel very high. I think there were also some big missed opportunities.

"New Ava" gets resolved in like the first 10 min with 0 impact on the overall story or the characters... like why. This should have been dragged out for the whole episode IMO, it would have been so fun. But they just wanted to get it out of the way to race to the Janine-leaving-Abbott story. Also Janelle looked fucking amazing and pretty much stole the episode, so they should have just let her run away with it instead of confining the humor and drama to the very beginning.

"Oh no Janine went to work for the district, oh no Teddie isn't going to happen maybe, omg Janine is working with a new cute guy" doesn't generate any emotional tension because it all gets talked through by the characters in a short time span and Janine and Gregory are friends again by the end of the episode thanks to the timeskip. The will they/won't they was timed really well throughout the first 2 seasons so where is that sense of timing now yk...

Barbara like... did not do much to be honest... She resolved the New Ava problem, but after that mostly stood around and was a sounding board and complained about the district/changed her tune after ONE conversation where Manny said what could reasonably be, pardon me, just bullshit, bc we don't know him well as a character yet, and somehow Barb was like yay :) I like the district now :). She felt really underutilized. She deserves a PLOTLINE this season. I feel like Sheryl gets a lot of praise and attention, but the show doesn't always give her opportunities to match what she really contributes.

The Gary/Melissa situation ground my gears a lot, like it's super great that Melissa stands her ground and rejects him with everyone's support, but tbh "Gary does a massive misogyny using the Philly Eagles and the whole school as a prop" seemed like a moment for Melissa to be angry, not just sad. Like why did she end up comforting HIM? I feel like every time the show brushes up against misogyny something dumb like this happens

Jacob is Jacob and does Jacob things which is fine.

I'm also wondering: where is the charter school storyline??? Have they not been able to get Leslie Odom Jr back? They set him up as a Big Bad and the threat of Abbott being forcibly turned charter as a serious concern and then that completely vanished. Does ABC have some charter school people on its board...? Lol. I would love to find out if maybe Manny and his weirdos could play into this and turn out to be charter school villains but rn this just feels like a major loose end.

It's hard bc I have such a sentimental attachment to the characters and seeing them all back again was so nice. But this felt like a super clumsy start to the season. I'm sure there was a lot of pressure on the writers as well, not just in terms of the double episode format, but because the show has gotten so many awards and so much press, they may have felt they HAD to throw absolutely everything out there to build up the premiere as huge and explosive.

I'm hoping the return to the half hr format will help smooth out a lot of the wrinkles and help bring back some of the structure, because IMO there were definitely hiccups and missteps in past seasons, but you could really feel an underlying story structure for many parts of the show (Teddie, Barb and Janine's relationship, Ava's growth, Melissa and her personal life). Fingers crossed ig

[nono-bunny]

Thoughts on the last two episode of the Gokushufudo live action (and some other bonus general stuff now that I'm done with the show)

It was... A very weird deviation from the original premise and it didn't work too well imo, mostly just because of how out of place it felt. Don't get me wrong, I watched the last one while eating dinner and I literally cried all over my pasta anyway, but like. Even the "reveal" was weak, which is weird because the story is already basically just based around these misunderstanding bait and switches so?? Idk ig they aren't as good at making original ones- point in case being these two episodes which were all just original stories and felt completely wrong for what the show is. Idk, I guess focusing on drama and high emotion stuff just doesn't really work here. The addition of Yukari and Sakai HAVE proven that the people working on this adaptation were capable of making some great unique additions to the original story so. Idk

Anyway the whole show is very different in one crucial detail: people here seem actually aware of Tatsu's past as compared to the anime where everyone is mostly just scared of his vibe. It isn't like, a good or bad thing, it just ended up really changing some of the dynamics, which I guess is kind of necessary here with a more permanent recurring cast than just... A bunch of random animated characters that can be voiced by whoever. I really liked Tanaka for example! In the anime Tatsu has like, a whole bunch of different housewife friends and I really liked that here there's just the one badass and her slightly more timid friend- which?? I feel like it didn't start off as Tanaka and this one particular friend but they narrowed it down to mostly the two of them, which works, they're both cool and it was nice seeing her attitude towards Tatsu change

Tbh the Masa abuse really fucking got on my nerves, it's funny at the start but like. It genuinely got excessive and uncomfortable, I just... Don't even really like Eguchi and Hibari as much at this point and it's a lot to do with their attitude towards him, it was wholly unnecessary and they both obviously had other things going on so I don't know why they decided that focusing on a "yes honey" dynamic was the comedic direction that they're gonna focus on. They're honestly a disaster couple lol

There was a lot of focus on getting Tatsu back to the Yakuza which?? Feels super weird to me considering they've established it's been two years since he left, why now? Why are they all still bothering him? It was strange and the show was definitely at its best whenever they weren't focusing on the Yakuza stuff- since that's literally what the OG premise is, and why it's so beloved... Idk it really felt at times like it's trying to tell the story of Tatsu's life shortly after leaving but. It's been two years, and it just doesn't work. Same with the Himawari drama, it was all obviously forced and a bit out of nowhere (also wtf I hated seeing him hit her) and idk not that fun to watch when compared to them just riffing on Tatsu being weird yet ultimately accepted, y'know?

Anyway, despite all of my gripes here, this was genuinely a great adaption overall!! I just... Think the ending was really weak and weirdly completely out of tune compared to the rest of it so. I'm glad it isn't the end and that there's a special and a movie!

[florenceisfalling]

currently sobbing my eyes out thinking about the fact that all my ex-friends from my old community moved on so easily without me, so when the last childhood best friend i had left stopped responding to me, i assumed she stopped caring about me too. but then we figured out the phone numbers just got mixed up and she IMMEDIATELY starting ranting about how she'd been thinking about me constantly, and jumped right back into rambling with me like when we were younger. her response to me thinking she was ignoring me on purpose was just "NO I LOVE YOU DUMMY" and she started dancing when she learned about my college plans bc she was so excited for me. and now i get to see her again on sunday, and she's already making plans to go to the river with me for the first time in so long

thinking about how the same kid who played with me on the floor of the church by my house when we were toddlers is the kid who rambled with me at a football game and told me about my now-favorite-musical & the kid who hiked through a ravine with me when we were sweating through our clothes & the kid who sat through a wild round of convention cosplay chess with me until 3 am & the kid who got slushees with me after that Still-Favorite-Musical & the kid who i had my first kiss with & the kid i am head over heels for & the kid who treats me with more love than i deserve

thinking about how my dad's old boss and my piano teacher i haven't seen in years and the woman who taught me in third grade all have checked up on me and talked to me and visited me in the past month, treating me like i am a close friend rather than just a small part of their life that came and went

thinking about how the boy at my school who is known for being oh-so-serious, who always keeps up appearances, who hates seeming vulnerable, who doesn't even give his sister hugs (only handshakes)... still held onto me and lets me mess with his hair and told me his secrets and learned how to recognize when i needed someone to talk to and told me he'd do "anything for [my] friendship" and told me i was one of the few people he trusted to talk to about certain things

thinking about how one of my friends has tolerated every dumb fuckign moment of mine for the past four years, even back when they said an average of about 2 words a day and i said about 4 million. thinking about how i went from scared of them and confused on if they would ever really even sPEAK to me, to having them over at my brother's place playing uno and talking about needlessly personal bullshit with me literally constantly

thinking about how two of my best friends call me mom, even though one of them is older than me, because they love me and they trust me to try to take care of them. thinking about how they're constantly rambling to me about stories and ideas, calling me on facetime just to show me makeup they did, sending me every writing wip and oc picrew they make, because they care about my input and they consider me a source of happy thoughts. i think i would set myself on fire to keep them even a little bit cozy

i'm not trying to be poetic or whatever i just can't stop crying, man. a huge part of my life felt scarred with this big, gaping wound of isolation and betrayal and abandonment and loneliness, to the point where it wasn't just a part of my history, but also a part of my identity. i didn't think i would ever be able to move past it. i didn't even think i could live with it. but like... people care. people care about me more than i can really even understand or put in words, more than i will ever deserve. this was intended to be a private rant but i think i'll put it out there just because i know that shit is tough and life can feel so fucking heavy. and i hated saying "it gets better" because i didn't believe it entirely. but holy shit, does life smack you upside the head with the kindest damn things sometimes!!!! i didn't know i could feel this loved. i didn't know it was possible. i think it's God. maybe it's smthn else. i'm just totally absolutely in love with the people around me right now

[ramzawrites]

Hey, so I'm having a really rough time rn (dealing with bs from my friend group, we have to take my really old dog to the vet today bc we found blood in her pee and we're scared that she won't make it this time, I'm struggling with my mental health, I'm just kinda goin thru it rn ig) so I would love a comfort fic with the sbi maybe with the reader as their sibling where the reader is the one that always comforts the fam, but hides their emotions until (1/2, very sorry about splitting it)

(2/2) something happens that makes the reader have a full on breakdown? I'll leave the rest to you, it can be a good or bad ending, headcanons or one shots, anything. You can ignore this request if you want/if it makes you uncomfortable. Please don't feel pressured/guilt tripped to write anything from this, your mental health comes first and I'm sure you're already really busy. Reminder to eat something today if you haven't yet and get a drink of water <3

We are family - Reader and SBI!Brothers

GN

Pairings: none

Characters included: Wilbur, Technoblade, Tommy, (mentioned) Niki, (mentioned) Schlatt

Warnings: n/a

Series: a request <3

Summary: Y/N came back from an errand and surprises their brothers with their weird behavior. Trying to put on their usual smile, trying to hide away their real emotions but their brothers know them better than they inititally suspected. They could immediately tell that something must have happened.

Words count: 2060

Authors Note: I’m so sorry this took so long! I hope you and your dog are doing better! 💙 I wish I could give you more than words of encouragement and that I managed to get faster to this request, I apologize Please make sure to take care of yourself, alright? Take time for yourself to deal with the stress and anxiety! Make sure to stay hydrated and remember to eat! Even if it’s just something small!

Once again I apologize for the long wait, I felt really bad already and then I kinda put it off because I felt bad.

adhd hit hard again and haven’t checked for typos yet, but will get on it as soon as I can o7

On another note if you want to read another comfort fic; I have a small series called “A Painful Reminder” which is more angsty but the 2nd part is more about the comfort, if that is something for you 

Living in the SMP was chaotic, turbulent and at times downright painful.

Most people tended to gravitate to one cause or other people to deal with this. Holding on to something so they don’t get pulled under. Get buried beneath the chaos and the violence.

So having people like Y/N around was like a godsend. They were one of the few people that seemed to be able to withstand the constant waves of misfortune and stand strong. Be the rock to hold onto when everything got too overwhelming.

Wilbur, Technoblade and Tommy loved their sibling for it.

After Wilbur and Tommy got exiled with Y/N out of L’Manberg, they were there and cheered both of their siblings up. Immediately making plans on how to set up a safe home and collecting ideas on how to get back. They were the one who managed to get a message out to Technoblade and asked him to visit them. Maybe help them.

Wilbur often jokingly said that Y/N was the glue that held the family together, to which they would always reply with the warmest of smiles “I’m glad.”

And what he said was true. Whenever the family fell on hard times and they began to drift apart it was Y/N who pulled all of them back. Pulling them back to reality and giving solutions for their problems if needed.

Sitting down with Wilbur when things got to much. Listening to his thoughts and worries, letting his emotion run freely without judgement. While they looked worried for him, their comforting smile never faltered. Offering him solutions to problems if he wanted it, otherwise they gave him the chance to just air his own thoughts out. To be angry with him. Sad with him.

Working with Tommy on his own projects. Listening to his ideas and giving him a different perspective that could improve some things but also respecting it when Tommy wanted to do this his way. And while he liked to brag and pretend that some things didn’t hit him that hard, they were still patiently listening to him as he spoke about his own pain in a more roundabout way. Telling him that he was not alone and making him feel heard.

Talking to Technoblade whenever the voices got too loud or out of hand again. He would just walk over to them and nudge them away, asking them to talk about something, no matter what. He just needed to hear their voice and be able to concentrate on it. Tune out the garbled voices in his head with a familiar sound that calmed him down no matter what. Leaning against them, slowly falling asleep as Y/N told all about how they were happily working on their own farm and what shenanigans they got up to.

Y/N really was like the warm sun on a cold day. Warming them up and protecting them.

Yes, Y/N was strong. So strong that even Technoblade considered them stronger than him. Maybe not physically but mentally and emotionally.

A clanging of metal rung through the cave. Techno was training with Wilbur while Tommy was just watching. Cheering on Techno.

It wasn’t an unusual situation and something Y/N expected to see as they made their way down the staircase. Wilbur in full iron armor and weapon while Techno just fought back with his own iron sword.

“Hey, Y/N! Welcome back!” Wilbur breathed out. Sweat running down the side of his face as he stopped attacking his brother.

The three men looked happily over to their sibling who slowly walked towards them but soon their expressions fell. Something was off about Y/N and it confused the three.

Their smile was as always plastered on their face but it looked strained. Their eyes wide open, trying to look sincere and loving but the glassy look of them gave off a different picture.

“Y/N? You okay?” Tommy asked as he stood up from the ground. Taking a step closer to them which made them in return stop in their tracks.

Y/N was hugging themself, shakily opening up their mouth to answer but nothing came out. It was then when Techno got very aware of how they were shaking in general.

This all seemed so wrong. This shouldn’t be possible. It just didn’t seem to register fully inside their minds.

Wilbur made sure to get rid off his sword and armor as fast as he could, walking over to his sibling, trying to get a better look at them but they just avoided his gaze.

Staring at the ground, slowly shaking their head “It’s- It’s fine. I’m fine.”

“You aren’t. You really aren’t. What happened? Did they find you?” Techno asked, his voice full with worry. A bit of anger hidden as well.

Y/N had their own little farm in order to support Pogtopia. The potatoes from Techno were great but variety is important after all. Though they also had an abundance of wheat they usually tried to smuggle into Manberg for Niki. Trying to help her out as much as possible with her taxes and work.

This time Y/N nodded “They did… It’s fine though. I’m fine. I’m not hurt. It’s all good.”

Wilbur’s frown deepened “Usually when people have to be so adamant about being okay something isn’t alright.”

Tommy nodded, supporting his statement only to whisper to himself “Adamant? What does-“

But Wilbur continued “We are your family, talk to us.”

Y/N licked their chapped lips “I’m-“

The tears finally escaped their eyes and begun streaming down their face. Sobbing they fell down on the ground. Wilbur immediately followed suit, laying his arm around them and pulling them against his chest. His hand flew up to their head and begun going through their hair, trying to calm them down. Humming a soft tune from their childhood.

It was the first time in their lives they saw Y/N break down like that and it was quite frankly shocking.

Unsure what to do with himself Tommy squatted down “Um, uh, what- what happened?”

Techno was still gripping the iron sword in his hand. Pacing up and down. Manberg found them? What the hell did they do to make Y/N break down like that? His own sibling! Whatever it was he would make sure to pay it back a thousand times over.

“Tommy can you grab them some water?” Wilbur laid his chin on top of Y/N’s head, rubbing circles now on their back.

He didn’t even hesitate, jumping up to run towards one of the chests with food items that Y/N had always ready for them. Grabbing a water bottle and running back over. Happy that he could do something else besides staring.

Tommy then pushed the bottle towards Y/N who gratefully took it, putting some space between them and Wilbur as they drank some of the cold liquid which helped them to calm down.

“You ready to tell us what happened?” Techno stopped pacing around. His gaze purely trained on his crying sibling. Anger still rising in him just like the voices.

Screaming things like “Technosib! How dare they hurt them! Protect them! I love Y/N so much! Why would anyone hurt Y/N! They always help us! Let’s help them for a change! Technosib! Let’s go out and fight them! Yeah! Blood for the Blood God and Y/N!”

Y/N’s voice was still wavering and a bit scratchy from their sobbing as they begun speaking “Hey, hey! Techno don’t concentrate on the voices. Listen to me. It’s all good.”

This somehow made Techno angry. He threw the sword away and finally knelt down next to them as well so his face was on the same eye level as theirs “Stop. Please. Stop thinking about us for one second. Stop trying to not make us uncomfortable or worried! Tell us what happened! Please.”

He was basically begging at the last part. All his worry packed into it.

“Yeah, honestly you trying to make sure everything is okay for us makes us even more worried.” It surprised the others a bit that this came from Tommy but he was correct.

Tears fell down their face again “I- I was just delivering more wheat to Niki and someone must have followed me. They followed me back to my farm and- and- they burned my fields down. There were explosions. I- it was just my farm. I did not harm. Just, why does it always have to end like this. Why do all the good things always end like this. Why can’t this place let something be. There is always something.”

The farm was so important to Y/N. It was their little project they put so much sweat, love and work into. It was their home away from home. A place to retreat and enjoy some peace. This obviously was devastating. It was their one thing they had for themself. The one thing that wasn’t there for anyone else but them.

It was also clear that this seemed to be the straw that broke the camel’s back and it broke the three a bit that they only now seemed to notice this. That it took that long and their whole farm being destroyed for the realize this was heartbreaking.

“Who?” Techno urged but Y/N shook their head.

“I don’t know. Everything went so fast and I tried to save as much as I could but- but it’s all gone. It’s all gone.” Their voice jumped up an octave at the end, burying their face against Wilbur’s shoulder again. Silently sobbing.

It should have been impossible but Wilbur’s frown deepened and his expression turned more grim “Don’t worry. We will get back at them. We will get our revenge. They will see firsthand what they did to you, I promise.”

Shocked Y/N looked up, their red and puffy eyes wide open “Wil, that’s not what I- no revenge. There is already too much misery going around I just want this to stop. I just want all of us being able to live in peace.”

Wilbur should have known that Y/N was too good natured for that but he couldn’t help himself. He was just so angry. Angry at Schlatt and Manberg. That they went for him was one thing but to go out of their way to treat Y/N like this? Let’s just say he put it on the list in bold letters with reasonings on why he will get back at the Manberg faction.

“Listen Y/N.” Techno begun, his voice now calm again “Stop it. Just for once think about yourself. Stop thinking about others for once. You are also worthy of the same care you give us. Let us at least help rebuild your farm. You always help us with our projects, let us help you with yours.”

Tommy seemed to lit up at that “That sounds like a good idea! We could build towers around your new farm and make sure no one gets in! We could put down traps and all!”

He really wasn’t sure how to react but that was at least something he could do for them. As the past General’s right hand man, this should be something he can do. If he couldn’t protect his sibling how could he ever hope to get L’Manberg back.

Wilbur seemed to think about it for a bit but agreed “Yeah, how does that sound?” Though the dark glint in his eyes stayed. The cogs in head still running off with his own thoughts.

“You guys would? Since when can you guys build?” a dry laugh escaped them but it was a laugh nonetheless.

Both Tommy and Wilbur looked almost appalled at that claim while Techno just shrugged and nodded. Just looking around Pogtopia was more functioning than good looking after all. Y/N tried to pretty it up a bit but usually something always happened around here.

“Also Y/N, please talk to us more. Don’t bottle everything up. Please. We worry a lot about you and we love you. You always do so much for us, let us do the same.” Wilbur pushed Y/N a bit off of him and looked them deep into their eyes, hoping that this would really hammer in that this was a genuine plea.

As a respone Y/N wiped the tears off their face “I understand. I’ll try to remember that.”

“Don’t try just do it.”

[texasbama]

I remember when Simone was first introduced and I was like "oh finally a black girl from beverly that isn't mixed/lightskin" and then they revealed that she lied about the pregnancy and I was like "oh why tf would you give her THIS storyline??" but then she and Jordan bonded, built up their fastburn and I was like "aww wait I love this and them, she's already elevated him as a character"

then season 3 came around and she was barely there because Geff was filming Snowfall, then the announcement of her spin off came and I was excited for her but worried about Jimone but thought "I'll be fine if they give them a good break up before she leaves" but NK's lying ass was going around saying "we spent way too much time to build this relationship to just break them up" 😒

but even in season 3 they set her up for failure/hate having her talk back to his mother (which I personally loved cause I don't care for Laura) which people (the locals) didn't like, then she was barely in any episodes to build up for her own show to make people like her and want to tune into HC. THEN they talk about "oh Simone's getting her own show" when really it's more about Damon than her - hell his ass was the one in the front in the very first poster which already set me off in not having faith in this show.

and now with that ig post where they use a "angry" picture for the darker skin girl and a happy/cute pic for the lighter one? confirmation that they hate her guts.

they may like Geffri, but they hate Simone. the views for the show aren't great and it won't even be going to Netflix where All American gets a lot of their success so I'm not expecting it to get renewed and tbh, while Simone is one of my top 5 characters out of any show, I hope it doesn't. Geffri deserves better, these shows (AA, AAHC) have not utilised the acting abilities she has, what she did with her little time on Snowfall? chefs kiss

sorry this is super long lol I just needed to get that off my chest

You make excellent points friend! When I saw that IG post yesterday I thought the same damn thing but I questioned myself. Like let me calm down, the emotions of the episode are clouding my thoughts. But after sitting on it, you are spot on. It screams colorism. From the poster to the IG post just…everything.

The writing on HC is mediocre at best. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t get picked up for a s2. I’m with you, I love Simone. I enjoy Keisha and Nathan and Thea. They have spent far too much time on this Damon birth parents thing and the aunt/coach story tbh. But so far there haven’t really been episodes where I leave it going “omg that was so good!” ya know?

I love Geffri and I agree that they aren’t utilizing her acting abilities. I want her to win so bad. It just really sucks that it seems that the show runners are not fully supporting her as the lead of the show.

[xxkellsvixen19xx]

Opposites Attract Colson Baker X Reader PT 1

Requested By @ateliefloresdaprimavera

Word Count: 1,838

A/N: Really playing with this concept so a part 2 is coming possibly doing multiple thoughts hmu and let me know guys! Hope you like it 😊

Song Lyrics: Young & Beautiful Lana Del Rey

People say opposites attract, that’s not only true for friends but also lovers. Colson can attest to that, he calls Y/N his lover his soul mate. One man and one woman, polar opposites but always at each other sides, through the good times and the bad.

Colson has been dating you for about 2 years they met at the record release party when his album Bloom came out. Y/N's  aesthetic flies in the face of modern sensibilities and embraces the carefree, the relaxed, and the unusual. With him no denying that he was handsome. His blonde hair, strong jaw and crystal blue eyes that seemed to make every girl melt right under his stare. Not to mention the fact that he always walked around in the latest designer clothes, all perfectly styled. He has the sex appeal of a god the tattoos adding to the bad boy mystique.

When they went public with their relationship surprisingly the fans took it well and have been very supportive. The comments on his IG posts showed so much love it is honestly sweet.

@Mystical Dimples: what a perfect couple @machinegunkelly & @YN

@FloatingHeart: Born to love each other!

@GirlOfNeptune: you two are so in love! Congratulations @machinegunkelly & @YN

Casie and you got along great she absolutely loved and adored you. And the two of you often had a girls day out lunch, shopping, it brought a smile to Colson's face knowing that Casie thought the word of you just like he did. The guys they thought of you like family and they were glad to see him so happy finally "It's about damn time!" Slim cheered out when you both broke the news to them. So many whoops of support, high fives, pats on the back and hugs it sort of felt like an episode of Full House. Y/N of course though may have a sweet quiet demeanor but don't let it fool you she loves smoking with Colson and the guys heck sometimes you could out smoke him like the best of them.

"Daddy are you going to ask Y/N to marry you?" Casie asking watching Colson look down at the elegant 7 carat diamond and gold engagement ring. "Yes special girl I am, I honestly believe we are meant to be together and I want to spend the rest of my life with her." Casie clapped and giggled jumping down off the bed bouncing out of the bedroom. "Daddy and Y/N sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g…" Colson couldn't suppress a giggle hearing the phrase echo down the hallway. You were beginning to awaken as you turned to face Colson wrapping and arm around him your other free hand rubbing his bare chest. "My babygirl stirs." He murmured kissing your head. Your eyes opened staring straight into his icy blue ones, it might be first thing in the morning but god he looked sexy. "Morning baby." Colson was going to wait till tonight and pop the big question but he couldn't take it he was to anxious to hold off any longer.

He grabbed your hand in his the ring clasped tightly in his other. "Y/N you have managed to do something I had't thought possible, love again." Placing the delicate engagement ring on your finger he asks "I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you, Y/N will you marry me?" Smiling you kiss him "Yes" you whispered a few tears of happiness sliding down your cheek. Pulling you tightly to him Colson broke out into a huge smile, "besides I need your sexy ass to keep my wild one in line." Colson couldn't imagine you not in his life, you balanced him out kept him anchored. The sex was absolutely incredible it managed to break out a side of you that drove him wild. There was no doubt in his mind that he had managed to snag the perfect woman and he wouldn't trade that for the world.

**********************************************

The party inside the club was going strong, you, Colson, Slim, Rook and others were in the VIP section. You had this planned in the back of your mind all day, you slipped away undetected by Colson and headed to the stage whispering something to the MC he nodded as he pressed a few buttons as you grabbed a mic.

//I've seen the world, lit it up, as my stage now. Channelling angels in a new age now. Hot summer days, rock and roll and all the way I got to know, your pretty face and electric soul...//

Colson recognized the first few bars of music instantly.

Somehow, as he watched your fingers curl around the mic, he knew you were thinking of him. From how your lips curled into that sly sexy smirk, to the rose of your cheeks, he knew. Colson felt like a voyeur now but found himself loving the buzzing and heavy feeling.

A mind hush took over the once-rowdy crowd as the tune and timbre of your voice matched and melted into the cords perfectly. The ballad poured from you with such emotion and flourish, as though singing in front of a hundred people was the easiest thing in the world for you to do. You clearly didn't need the prompter to know the words, so with your eyes closed you hit every single syllable and carried each note effortlessly. The gentle sway of your hips along with the music was magnetic and memorizing, not only to him but to nearly every other person in the club too.

//Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful? Will you still love me when I've got nothing but my aching soul? I know you will, I know you will, I know that you will...//

With a final smirk, Y/N ended her song and the crowd burst out into a boisterous ovation. Their whole table stood and cheered loudly, joining with the other patrons in their own enthusiastic applause.

You bowed graciously, grabbed your drink from the barstool next to the mic and exited stage right. You then walked towards their table, towards Colson, with a subtle purpose and a sultry look in your eye.

Your gaze landed on Colson's lean frame, sunk casually into the bend of the booth, his  leather jacket off, his white button down shirt his tattooed chest on full display. You contemplated jumping him right then and there but realized that no one really needed to see that.

Besides, you could keep your hands to yourself for one night, surely...

A drunk fleeting thought dared question how deliciously torturous it would be to spend all night next to him and not touch or kiss him. You imagined how cathartic it would be when you finally allowed yourself the pleasure. It was almost a challenge made silently unto one's self.

'How long could I really go?'

Because, God, he just looked so goddamn sexy. Colson's cool laid-back demeanour added to his enticing aesthetic, and you wondered, idly, how many others  in the club had noticed his effortless allure and charisma.

Pleasantly, his posture straightened as he saw you approach and that wicked side smirk tugged at his knowingly soft lips, making your knees weak.

'I won't last the night.' You thought to yourself.

Your beaming smile was sloppy and your limbs seemed extra loose as you approached, but judging by the empty champagne, shot and highball glasses that scattered the table your swagger was just.

Y/N then slipped into the booth next to Colson, settling in close, really close, a heavy hand falling on to his thigh under the table. She planted a firm kiss to his cheek with a wide grin.

'See? I can't even last 5 seconds...I won't last the night…

As the group chatted loudly about the day's activities, Colson found himself lost within warmth radiating off her, the smell of her perfume and sweet sweat invading his senses. His eyes drifted over her exposed neck, shoulders and ample cleavage. You looked like sin personified in that dress, the fit and cut leaving nothing but filthy desires to cloud his brain as he subtly adjusted himself in his seat.

You were amazing up there, by the way." Colson said.

You spin around to face him fully, the thin strap of your dress shifting down your shoulder with the movement, "Thanks, baby."

Without thought he reached up to put the fabric back in place, cool fingertips gliding over your warm skin. The action warmed you but you tried your best to recover quickly.

'...Girl... Focus up.'

"You had them hook, line and sinker,"

"I'm just a pretty H/C  up there in hot pink." You said with a flip of your wrist.

"Yea, you are, with the voice of a fucking angel."

A warm blush crept over your cheeks and chest, "Colson..."

"What? I'm serious."

"They reacted the same to Ashleigh,"

"I doubt that."

"And Kali."

"I doubt that even more."

"It's true!"

"Prove it." He challenged.

"What would you have me sing?" You asked sweetly.

Colson smirked, "Literally anything."

His lowered tone had his desired effect and as the words fell off his tongue a visible shiver rolled over you. You smirked back and sipped at your drink again, your eyes on his through thick blonde lashes.

After singing a few favourites including a cover of 'Chandelier ', then a duet with him to 'Bad Things', followed by a ballad rendition of 'Crazy', nearly consecutively, Y/N flopped back into their booth with a heavy sigh.

"Entertaining is hard work!"

"Yet another amazing performance," Colson topped up your water glass as you settled in, "-You wowed the crowd,"

A realization, if anything, it was a green light to engage in some sort of unspoken game of seducing you,

The thought alone drove him wild.

So, he kept up the silent charade, the rouse serving as an effective aphrodisiac, and was also, clearly, convincing.

"I'm not flirting." He offered gently.

"I know. You're just being your polite and charming shelf." You cooed at him.

A small smile pulled at his lips now, "What should I do?" He asked.

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

Turning to face him more, you smirked again and cocked an eyebrow, "Well, that's not true."

As you spoke the hairs on the back of his neck stood up for the second time that night, "Oh?"

"You could find us an excuse to leave, and take me back home." You said with such a deadpan seriousness that he nearly choked on his beer.

"Bail on our engagement party?"

Y/N nodded, eyes dark and suggestive, "Just let me use the ladies room first,"

Colson didn't need to be told twice and agreed quickly as you slid out of the booth. He then stood just as you came out of the bathroom moments to grab your jacket and small purse.

"Ready?" He asked, sweeping his arm out in front of you and towards the doors.

"Very."

[sarahfalciani]

3 years ago I was medicated out of my mind, just released from a military psych ward after having a full psychotic break, with a plan to end my life.

1 year ago today I was in the process of extracting myself from my 6 year long abusive relationship.

October 10th is my no contact anniversary. October 11th is my release date from the hospital.

Today I woke up, feeling present and grounded. I had a pretty cool dream/vision that ended up being a really cool metaphor for my coaching program that I've created for you (I'll save that story for another day's blog post). It woke me up at 0345 and I couldn't go back to sleep, so I got in my car, grabbed some Starbucks, and started driving in random circles listening to music and reflecting on my life.

I have been in therapy and worked with coaches here and there consistently since the year of my hospitalization. I have been off meds for a little over a year now. I have one successful business and another one that is taking off at a rapid rate. I'm in a master's program that I love, doing the research I've intended on pursuing since freshman year of undergrad 10 years ago. I'm a professional coach. I'm about to be a published author. I'm almost out of debt. I'm physically healthy, and have a deep love and acceptance for my mental health and dedicate time every day to my self care and my personal growth and development.

And you know, I still have days where I can't get off the couch. I still get anxiety in big groups of people. I still have some pretty deep trust issues with men & love that will take time and consistent work to heal. I still numb my emotions sometimes with one (or two) too many glasses of wine. I still cry in the shower sometimes because I just feel sad and alone. The idea of ending my life even still crosses my mind sometimes, although it's more and more rare as time goes on.

I don't get up at the same time every day. Hell, sometimes I sleep all day and work all night. I don't do the same thing every day. I don't exercise every day or follow a diet anymore. I don't follow rules or structure in any way, shape or form. Not because I made it a point to be a rebel or anything (hint: that would be choosing to follow a set of rules or structure in it's own right...) but because I made a choice to be happy doing exactly what I want every day, without judgment.

Being a leader, being a coach, being "successful" (whatever the fuck that means, anyway), having a voice doesn't mean I've got it all figured out all the time. I don't. I'm a human being who has just embraced exactly where she's at and made up her mind that she was enough exactly as she is in this moment.

It doesn't mean I'm happy all the time, or positive all the time. But I AM in tune with my needs. I AM in tune with my identity (and even that shifts & expands daily). I don't have it all figured out, but I've come a long way since my days of being in hospital-issued PJs, not allowed to write with anything more than a pencil the length of my thumb and having to ask a nurse every time I wanted a cup of water. I have come a long way since leaving my relationship.

I chose radical responsibility. Radical self love. Radical self acceptance. Radical self care. I stopped hiding and I did the work. And I show up every single day and I choose to do the work. Inside and out. The good, bad, and ugly of it.

I never not once have shut up about "that coaching thing" and now I am WELL on my way to having a fully booked coaching practice which is going to change the world, helping one person at a time to fall in love with themselves and their life exactly as it is TODAY.

Never not once will I stop sharing my story. Never not once will I not be real with y'all. Never not once will I not show up for myself, and for you. My one hope is that by sharing my experiences with the hospital, the military, my relationship, my rape, my mental health, and every other dark and twisty (and sunshine filled barrels of AWESOME) parts of my journey that you will know that you are never alone. Even if it feels like you are, you're not.

You're loved. I love you.

So with that, Happy Anniversary week to me, and thank you so much for being a part of my journey. Special shout out to the human who took me to the hospital (even when I didn't want to go. You know who you are. I owe you my life ❤) and those who visited me while I was there. Thank you to my coaches, my therapists, my family, and my friends who have been there all hours of the day and night, on the worst days AND on the best days. I'm so excited to report that the best days are happening more and more, and the VERY best is still yet to come. 🖤💫🤗

Pictures below: the cup they gave me for water in the hospital. I probably will never get rid of it. The IG post I wrote the day I was released. And a picture if me with Ro yesterday at the park.

I love you,

Sarah

P.s. If my story and my message resonates with you and you are interested in working with me:

✨

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I have a few spots left in the beta version of my private coaching program Unapologetically You!

It's an elite, 3 month inner circle one-on-one coaching experience with me that takes you from the box you've been living in to throwing out the rulebook. You're going to get back in touch with WHO you are and what your values are, you're gonna shift the limiting beliefs and bust through blocks that have kept you small and you're going to learn how to start unapologetically showing up in your life with a focus on self love, self care, and an abundance of Queen (or King!!) Energy. I'm going to take you through the exact process that I used to go from small, broken, depressed, controlled by food, codependent in friendships & relationships, and constantly apologizing and anxious, to standing in my power as an Unapologetic Badass.

We're gonna cover money, time, body, food, relationships, friendships, family, self-esteem, business/career, guilt, shame, and anything else that is at your CORE holding you back from where (and who) you want to be.

During our 3 months together you get:

✨ One 30 minute coaching call at the start to set you up for success

✨Two 20 minute coaching calls per month after that

✨Unlimited whatsapp/messenger access for text/voice note coaching as needed

✨Journal prompts

✨PDF trainings

✨And more as we go (beta version = testing some things out. There will be some flexibility with the calls and such)

I know this program is priceless and it has been a long long LONG time coming. Literally my life's purpose. I've lived it. Breathed it. And I've been tasked by the Universe to help others along their journey.

This means the world to me. It's taken me many years, a lot of courses, coaches, mentors, therapy, trial and error, life experiences, journals, meditation sessions, brainstorming, and nights in the fetal position crying in my kitchen to finally find peace with my purpose. This is it. This is what I'm meant to unleash into the world. This is how I'm meant to lead and help others.

This is for every woman (or man) who has ever cried in the shower feeling lost and alone.

This is for me. This is for you.

If this resonated and you would like to grab a spot in the beta version (thank you in advance for being my guinea pigs!!!) DM me with any questions and let's do this shit. ❤