#i'm just mumbling out loud because it's not often the thought loop gets new sillyputty to play with about all this

[aechlys]

So that was certainly a more complete article translation.

You know, I think that......this year has absolutely been a year of mourning and remembering. And Atsushi's presence is still crystal fucking clear. But one day, perhaps even this December's live, Imai will unleash his new everything and it's going to be like being tossed into the ocean or knocked violently in the face. Granted, Imai's sound has had a thread of consistency to it since day one which has always impressed me, but if he really does end up ripping out every single one of the pages from the book, I......I don't know, part of me seriously wonders if that's *too* much. But we'll see. That interview was from march/april and they've been in the studio all this time and things morph and change and grow. I think it's going to get even more experimental and even more strange, but so long as Imai keeps that one single stylistic thread that's been there from the beginning and the other guys keep a sharp eye, too, it should be ok. Right?

It will still feel like being tossed into the sea eventually- walking into your home after years away to find the whole place utterly redecorated and it finally dawning on you the horror consequences of Absence. I don't know how to really describe the feeling that has hit me right now. At this very precious moment, in this final year, everything is perfectly crystalized and Atsushi is Here, not 'behind'. But when Imai knocks all the walls of the house down and Atsushi is nowhere to be found inside.....I think the cold that settles into my bones will be pretty unbearable. Because there really will be no going back. Toll was right that his departure was absurdly sudden and what else can they do but try and grasp for some sort of conclusion at best?

I don't know, I understand what everyone is saying here, I am just....expecting now to be hit by the truck of no return and wondering, at least in this one moment, if I want to experience that or not, when there is still the chance to maintain the perfect crystal, blissfully ignorant of anything else. I don't know- curiosity has always been a weakness of mine so...probably...hahah.