#i'm back for the day to celebrate international becca day

[jackles010378]

I can't do this anymore part 2........

(sorry it's taken so long 🫣)

Y/n pov:

You had been driving around for a couple of hours. Not going in any particular direction. Once you left your home that you shared with Jensen, you weren't sure where to go.

Your mind was swirling with so many thoughts, you needed them to stop. You hadn't realised you had turned into the parking lot of the bar where you met Jensen the night of your birthday. You parked your car and turned off your engine. Reaching into your pocket you pulled out the photo of you both. it was one from the night you met him, Jared had taken it with out you or Jensen knowing. You both looked so happy, it made you sad and the tears began to flow, you remembered that night as if it happened yesterday.....

2 years ago :

"i really don't want to go out Becca, I'm happy staying in and having movie night" you shout from your bedroom as you're being forced to go out and celebrate your birthday. "Oh come on y/n, we haven't been out in ages, and you only turn 40 once" Becca shouts from your living room where she was waiting for you. You really weren't in the mood for going out. You had just been dumped by your boyfriend of 4 years, finding out he'd been seeing someone else. You thought he was going to propose but no, for the last year and half he'd been sleeping with his secretary 'what a cliche' you thought to yourself.

After applying a small amount of make up, keeping your hair loose and cascading down your shoulders, throwing on a simple knee length green dress with a pair of flats, if you're being forced out you may as well be comfortable! You entered your living room giving Becca a small twirl "will this do your majesty" Becca laughed "you look gorgeous y/n, the men will be all over you" you snorted at that comment "no way, I'm not looking for anything, not yet" you grabbed your purse and headed out.

Arriving at the bar Becca had chosen, you saw a small booth decorated with banners and a few of your friends sitting waiting for you. You glared at Becca "what would you have done if I hadn't come with you" "well, y/n I would've got you here one way or another". You hugged your best friend and walked over to say hi to your friends.

Although you didn't want to admit it you were having a pretty good time. You heard the bell on the door ring. In walked two very tall and handsome men. You turned to Becca and grabbed her arm "Bec, am I seeing things or did Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles just walk in here" you couldn't take your eyes off them as Becca turned to look. She turned back to you with wide eyes " she was now squeezing your arm as hard as you squeezed hers. You both couldn't stop staring but soon averted your gaze when you caught Jensen's eyes. Those perfect green orbs, the ones you see in your dreams were looking at you. You smiled at him shyly and turned back to your friends.

About half an hour later Jared had made his way over to your table introducing himself and asking if he and Jensen could join you. You scolded yourself internally for acting like a babbling idiot but they still joined your little party. You were nervous as Jensen scooted in by you after Jared took the chair by Becca. You saw the look Jared gave Jensen with a little smirk 'Seriously he can't be trying to hook us up' you thought to yourself.

You didn't want to get your hopes up, I mean this is Jensen Ackles why would he be attracted to someone like you. You're just a normal person with a normal 9 to 5 job average body and average looks. They told you all about filming supernatural and the pranks they'd pull on each other. You were captivated with the way Jensen would tell you the stories. Jared noticed how he would only look at you when he spoke. He took his phone out making it look like he was texting but he took a sly photo of you mid laugh with your hand on Jensen's shoulder and Jensen looking straight at you with the biggest smile on his face.

As much as you didn't want to leave you remembered you had work the next morning so had to call it a night, it was only just after midnight but still you had an early start, so you said your goodbyes to everyone and went outside to wait for your Uber. You saw Jared and Jensen leaving the bar, Jensen walking over to you "we can give you a lift, if that's ok with you?" You could hear the doubt in his voice, was he nervous you thought to yourself. You told him that you had an Uber booked, when you saw him frown you told him you'd cancel it and accepted the lift off him and Jared.

You never imagined that your night would end like this, THE Jensen Ackles walking you to your door. You fumbled around for keys unsure of how to end the night. Should you kiss him, would he think you're being too forward. You both stood there not sure what to do. So you thanked him for a great night, he answered you calling you sweetheart something you'd always dreamt about. That gave you the courage to leave a kiss on his cheek. You felt his hands rest on your waist as your face aligned with his. Jensen cupped your face and lent in as did you, lips connecting with a gentle soft kiss. He broke away when he heard the honking on the horn coming from the SUV. He asked to see you again, so you put your number in his phone and told him that depended entirely on him. He kissed you once more before making his way back to the car. The very next day, you were extremely happy to get a call from him asking you out.

Present day.......

Your phone kept ringing in your pocket, you knew it was him. You knew he'd be home now and would have found your note. You loved Jensen so much, but the past couple of months you didn't feel as if you were good enough, skinny enough or pretty enough for him. You saw the photos on his socials of his very attractive co stars, you couldn't compete with that. It made you wonder what he was doing with someone like you.

Sure he invited you to the parties, and always tried to get you to visit the sets of the shows he was working on, but you would always make excuses to not go. You didn't want to embarrass him.

You felt he could do better, so you decided to leave him, it broke your heart but he could then find someone more worthy of his love.

At this point your phone had not stopped ringing. You took it out of your pocket and noticed you had several missed calls. Most of them off Jensen but also a few off Jared and Gen and a couple off Misha too. You saw all the messages coming through from Jensen :

J❤️: y/n sweetheart I'm not sure what is happening right now, all I want to know is that you're safe, please baby, I need to know your alright, where are you? xx

J❤️: just let me know you're okay baby please, I'm losing my mind with worry y/n please answer me xx

J❤️: y/n, one little txt, just so I know your okay please darlin xx

J❤️: I can't lose you y/n, please tell me where you are, I don't wanna lose you! I love you xx

J❤️: Baby please, please talk to me, I can't do any of this without you, please darlin. I just can't do any of it without you. Y/n answer your phone sweetheart xx

You let out a deep sigh, you knew you had to talk to him, you owed him that much. He was the sweetest, most loving man you had been in a relationship with. Guilt was setting in now, so you pulled up your contacts and hovered over his name. With a deep breath you hit the call button.

Ahhhhh gonna leave it there. So yeah seems like there will be a part 3 😂 hope you enjoyed this part 🥰

PART 3

@k-slla @cevansbaby-dove @kaleldobrev @janineb86 @deans-daydream @alternativeprincess94 @stoneyggirl2

[sirro85-blog]

Dark Horses 6

So, what are the Xhost? Now, so long after they have left the stars it's a question that can be asked.

The Xhost were an idea that became a cult, if humans are more durable and Rhul are faster and Biviladi are more adaptable to environmental changes what if instead of celebrating the diversity we examined the discrepancies and found a common ground?

A noble thought, corrupted, corrupted into the Xhost where races were genetically modified to be a bit of everything, differences were no longer celebrated as part of a more fantastic whole but instead were vilified as non-conforming.

To the Xhost purity was required, variation was the enemy.

Kovac sat against the wall looking at his friends, Wolf shook his head and turned to Dorman for support.

"No," said Kovac, " you both have opinions and you're both entitled to them, but you're wrong.

It's as simple as this. Iron man is the greatest superhero, all those with superpowers built in can fuck right off, if your solution to a problem is punching harder then you're not a solution. Iron man's super power is thinking better than all of the others, he figures stuff out, after that his inventions win fights. All the other smart guys either have powers or their limited, I mean Batman isn't a one man army. Reed Richards works stuff out then relies on being Mr Fantastic to solve the problem.

Also Tony fights butt naked and the rest don't."

Kovac looked at his friends and smiled at their faces, "look it's this simple, your mind, the human mind is the greatest weapon in the galaxy. Now the second lesson I have to teach you is this simple, no matter what your taste in music one song needs special attention."

"We Will Rick You, by Queen will be remembered as a Pride song but it shouldn't be. What really matters is the solo or fade out; that piece of guitar play by May...everything else is just delivery for that.

Finally, if you're not happy, watching bad television at 0400 with you're partner then you're relationship won't last, if their presence doesn't bring you joy then move on.

Right that's about it, that's my life time knowledge, guess we should see this out then." Kovac stood.

Outside the Xhost forces had swept across the continent.

"Major, you know that the General will mobilise to defend us, even with the bones of a brigade. Major General Michaela Jones will be here," Wolf said.

"I know Wolf, the question has always been how do we drive the Xhost back? They control more sectors than the Rhul and the Flet together, they control more planet's than the Korlax."

"They've never defeated the Galactic Council forces though." Dorman countered.

"Well that's not strictly true, they've never won a war against the GCDF but they've always required mobilising core divisions and I hate to say it but that means human troops, we're the backbone of the GCDF without our presence the Xhost have seen success."

"You really don't think we can save the Towoli? Or the EDC?" Wolf asked morose.

"With a squadron of combat engineers? No." The Major was terse in his response.

Captain Becca looked out at the gathering darkness, "three days to capture the Towoli and secure the cities, so on the fourth day they turn around and hit the EDC, they're dug in now, so they last, maybe another four days and then it us. In this position we can last, maybe three days. That gives the Major-general two weeks, to raise at least a brigade and to get to us..." the question hung in the air unasked.

Kovac puffed out his cheeks, and rubbed his right forearm. "Remember in the 88th there became this belief that I'd pull it out of the fire, everytime it looked impossible odds you'd hear the men, "trust in kovac" I have that faith in Michaela Jones. Our only job right now is to keep open this beach head so she can land the troops. Now I've shared my life's wisdom with you, who has any other nuggets to share?"

Sergeant Major Panther had her own meeting with her sergeants, the needs of various troops and sections were discussed and the talk turned to how long they could hold out, "Captain says three at a push, but knowing the Major, if say closer to five."

"It'll take them a week to roll the Towoli and the EDC so by the end of the second week it'll be all over," said Sergeant Webb.

"No, you're forgetting Webb, we've got Kovac, 'keep calm and trust in Kovac' I've been saying that for over ten years now and I'll keep saying as long as he keeps earning my damn faith." Knickers glared at her fellow sergeants, "what was it he always said? It's us, it's us the 88th, well now it's us the Dark Horses but it's still us, we're still the real first in last out and we're still fighting fit and fucking ugly, Kovac will know what to do and when he asks us to do the impossible we'll deliver."

Panther grinned, "Exactly, so get out there and tell that to the men, wipe their little faces, help them blow their noses and smack the heads that need smacking, we are the Dark Horses and we will do what is needed."

"Except the Major is sitting there saying the same about the General," Webb said, "you all know I love the man, he's personally saved my life four times that I can count, if anyone can save us he can...but he isn't trying to. He's not even mentioned trying to save the Towoli and the EDC, he's said we use them as cannon fodder. Our hope is that we get rescued by the woman we walked away from to follow Kovac."

The sergeant-major stared at her sergeants, she seemed at a loss for what to say.

"I'll keep my faith thank you Webb. You're not wrong, yet, but I'll put my trust in Kovac."

Corporal Grey was growing weary of banging heads, the men were despondent and grumbling. The leader they trusted beyond all others was finally cornered and they could all see it. He watched as Captain Dorman walked away from the Major looking down-trodden, after a few steps the officer managed to organise himself and he straightened his shoulders and put his head up...keeping up appearances.

"I hear you're out of ideas and we're all fucked," said a coarse voice behind Kovac.

"Hello RQ," said Kovac without turning round, "and do you believe it?"

"Of course not, you need extra arms for all the tricks up your sleeves," scoffed the Quartemaster, "but they do, the rank, which I'm guessing is the point."

"They're good people, good people don't become monsters without falling down first, I need them to be monsters, they have to lose hope so when I throw them a cobra for a life line they grab it."

"What's the plan troop?"

"The secret to Xhost success is that the Xhost have their own supply of fuel, took us a while to realise what it was, now they use a variety of tricks but the basic component is Phosphene gas, toxic and smells like rotten fish half the time. So the finest galactic scientists looked at how they could inhibit their engines, how they could stop the Xhost fuelling their war machine, they failed. Then a human looked at it, her solution was deemed too heinous, the very suggestion caused humanity some problems, as we were suddenly seen as viscious and evil."

"What was her solution?"

"Chemistry, it's beyond me but...have you ever heard of White Phosphorus?"

The Qm blanched, "really!? That's your solution?"

"Turn their fuel into chemical weapons, I just need men desperate enough to agree to it."

"Kovac..."

Kovac turned to look at the Qm, "first time you've ever called me that, look, we can sit here and let the Xhost slaughter the Towoli and the EDC or we can act, to save innocent lives, maybe we need to be less innocent."

The Qm was quiet a moment and then sighed, "you think we have to?"

"I do."

"Alright then," she touched his arm and left him.

Kovac stared into the gathering gloom, "Clausewitz never finished and Ludendorff was a bastard who lost," he seemed to mutter to himself.

Later Kovac would say it was almost sad how quickly his men agreed to his plan, but they did. So within 6 hours his troops were prepared and moving out.

Before dawn the Dark Horses had returned to their fortifications, none of the normal a activities were on display, showing pride in a job we'll done. Instead the attitude was grim, an unpleasant job but one needing done.

Outside in the skies and on the ground, the Xhost burned, White Phosphorus burns on contact with air and it can burn even human flesh to the bone. Steel melts at half the temperature of burning white phosphorus.

I've seen artists renderings of the human construct of hell, the day the Xhost burned was brighter, hotter and there was more smoke. The issue of demons I'll leave to other scholars.

Ten days later Major General Michaela Jones landed with the 3rd army of the Galactic Defence Force to discover a smoking planet and the Towoli and EDC talking about burning skies and enemies vaporized in a wall of heat.

The Dark Horses, grim of face and closed in demeanour said nothing, they simply boarded and left with the advance ships into Xhost territory.

There is a phrase amongst those who study human kind, it's taken from their own old language, a term itself bastardised from an even older tale, "humans are space-orcs"

To humans it's funny, "the human can withstand the loss of a limb and is capable of feats of strength near impossible to other races, they fix metal into their mouths and inject their skins for aesthetic purposes...ha ha, fuck yeah we're space-orcs"

But to those of us who study, it means something different, orcs are the monsters of human fiction, rewritten and redefined they are brutal, barbarous and backwards. Their savagery and their lack of humanity is common in all their iterations. Orcs are the monsters humans see in themselves.

We space going species forget that humans may be like us in their hunt for answers but they got to this technology not through global cooperation but through war-driven advances and international tensions and competition.

They have only recently become the advanced global society we know, just under the surface lies the monster. Humans are Space Orcs.

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So I know the Chemistry is a bit hinky here according to a chemist friend of mine what I've said is possible but not easily but...hey It's sci-fi.

Anyway this one ends in a dark place but it's where it went and I can't really pretend I know what I'm doing.

As always feedback is appreciated.