#i'm always like ''ahhh what if everyone hates this and blocks me and talks about me behind my back :((''
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you procrastinate making videos cause being judged is scary you're so close to being forgotten the hate's imaginary. kind of a raw ass line tbh
#<- me posting my story#i'm always like ''ahhh what if everyone hates this and blocks me and talks about me behind my back :((''#literally no one cares anymore lmao#i can't even remember the last time i got a hate comment#i used to get them at leastttt once a week#then i got in my head about everyone hating me and now i re-read my work literally HUNDREDS of times before i post it#it's one of my worst compulsions but i can't make myself stop#its not even like i'm proofreading them?? my mind kinda blacks out after the second re-read#it's why i always announce that i'm going to post a story post a day in advance so i have some accountability hanging over my head#otherwise i literally will keep re-reading it for weeks and never post it#thank god i never pursued writing on a professional level because holy shit i would be useless#i'm posting this on this personal blog because it's embarrassing lmaooo#this account is my diary for the 5 amazing weirdos who i appreciate dearly
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omg i don't think you can even begin to imagine how fucking happy i was while reading this chapter. i love happy zukka, they are so !!!! together thank u thank u thank u thank uuuuuuu.
i became fucking insane reading this i swear, i love how you write, all of the characters you write about feel so human and real and full of details and feeling i love it. like, ara is such a complex character i really enjoy reading her. i enjoy reading anybody actually and like, i sometimes forget that some characters are ocs instead of actual alta charters. i love katara and suki being besties and the interactions between toph and sokka. AND ZUKKA AJS2(+#+$IDO!!!!!!2?2(2929. omg just omg. i love how caring they are for eachother and I'm so glad they are more open and touchy with eachother, i now feel like they can actually start to heal together.
OOOO talking again about Ara, i maintain my point about wanting her to have some friends and to heal because she deserves it!!! i support womans rights and woman's wrongs (jk, I'm still a bit angry at her for like everything she did to zuko and i want to se some kind of interaction between them but at the same time i feel bad for her). oh and jet, yey I'm glad he's not dead and he's starting to realize how much of an asshole he was!!!! i also really liked the piandao bit, because it made me remember how much time everyone (hopefully) has to heal, so please don't kill anyone sreeady ☺️☺️
i love love love love love love love love love your ocs and your characterization and your worldbuilding and your writing and how fuckin long your chapters are!!!(god when I saw the wordcount of this one i almost screamed of pure joy). i am your biggest fan sreeady i swear 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
anyways, i am excited about the next chapter, i really want to read the whole family dinner thing because that could either way go akward asf or low-key bad (of hopefully good but i don't want to get my hopes up). i am not really excited about azul, don't get me wrong, i love her, but I'm really scared about what will happen when she finally arrived and stuff happens.
as i always say, i love you, you are the best and i hope you have the best week/month/anything ever because you deserve it (you have no idea how long I been waiting for cuddling zukka 🙏🙏🙏)
MILKYYYYYYYY!!!!
I’m really thrilled you enjoyed the last chapter haha, because honestly sometimes I get so used to writing angsty drama that I get to a soft scene & im like hmmmmmmmmm do i even remember what that is?? Haha.
I AM SO THANKFUL FOR YOU OMG!!!! you seriously have no idea how many times I read this ask and smiled. I am so glad the cuddly soft zukka hit all the right spots haha, they are such dorks in love I just wanna smother them! (I won’t…. I promise haha)
You know you mention Ara and I gotta say I was expecting SO MUCH ARA HATE after last chapter but I was shocked people seem…. Idk…. More understanding? Idk I know she’s complicated & not a ‘good girl’ but when you explore her characters thoughts it really makes her that much more complex. Haha I’m not going to lie I’m not looking forward to her finding out about Shen though ahhh.
Speaking of dead fire benders you’re right it seems like pretty much DYING was the push Jet needed to confront his life choices. He was forced to look at his situation without voicing his excuses and blocking out his thoughts. Now hopefully he accepts those changes and grows form it but ehhhh jets my stubborn boy so we’ll see lol.
Milky milk milk I adore you. Thank you for this wonderful ask & sorry I used it to rant a but. I love reading your thoughts you are adorable :) I hope you enjoy the next chapter too lol. We get some fun moments (& Zuko imploding & exploding a bit haha)
#zukos stressed#which is understandable#& he is finally at the point where he is lashing out lol#put him and katara in a room together and only one person is coming out of there haha#not to mention the family dinner hahaha#it’s going to be a Jee pov so just#WOW get ready for that hahaha#such snarky judgement#gotta adore my logical but also extremely emotional jee#& Zuko and Sokka in the same room conscious with an audience for the first time hahahahaha#oh gosh#so much drama I hate them#jk I love them#alright milky I’ve talked enough#they’re playing the music I gotta get off the stage#lovvveeeee youuuu#liab#ITF#Garfieldsmilk#ask
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I agree with all the anons saying that Jikook’s bond is especially scrutinized an despised. It’s so hard to completely block the haters on Twitter out sometimes. I unfortunately came across some of the subgroup talking about how they’re glad JK isn’t friends with Enwoo anymore because he was hanging out too much with Jimin (who they think is using JK’s friends for attention). Even though we did see a clip of JK interacting with Enwoo, they are convinced that JK can sense how Enwoo is a ‘fake friend/snake” because he seems to hang out more with Jimin. It’s like everything that has ever been associated with JK that Jimin touches becomes invalid. Suddenly The JK&Enwoo friendship is no more because Jimin had a hand in it?? Just say that Jimin is not your favourite member and go, no need to drag him down and/or disrespect JK’s friendships as well.
This ask was sent a few weeks ago I think, but I hadn't had a chance to post it. I apologise for that, anon. Yes, you are absolutely right. Everything jikook does is analysed and generates in many people an urge to disprove it, explain it or o7ify it. In the same way, jikookers are scrutinised and required to behave in a way that other shippers or supporters are not. Every time something happens between Jimin and Jungkook that makes their shippers and supporters talk about it, many people come out to criticize, insult or explain why what jikook did, didn't mean anything or at least not what their shippers/supporters understand. The haters in this fandom think they know what their favs need, think and believe. And that applies to everything: Friendships, work, relationships, even their careers. Fans and shippers know better than they do, what they need in all aspects of their life. The biggest problem is that these self-appointed heroes don't care what their favs say. What they literally have said. What they have done. That is irrelevant. That particular narrative that the subgroup has, that everything related to Jimin is bad and everyone related to him is bad, how does that apply to Tae, for example? Tae loves Jimin. He has said so. countless times. Is Tae a snake too? One of the many problems the subgroup has is that many or all of the "reasons" they have for hating Jimin in one way or another hurt Tae and Jungkook. This brings me back to my first point: Their supposed favs are irrelevant. What they believe, think, have said and done is irrelevant. The hate, and dislike towards Jimin is not because they are tkkrs, it's because they simply hate, and dislike Jimin. Being tkkrs is the excuse they use to do it because it makes sense in a certain way. Think of it this way: Person A: Uggh I hate Jimin, I wish he would leave the group. Person B: Why? He's really talented, he's a good person, a great friend. Everyone who knows Jimin can only say good things about him. Person A: ahhh I'm tkkr. Person B: Ahhhhh that makes sense. See? Hating Jimin just because it doesn't make sense because there is no reason to do so. Hating Jimin for the sake of it would only show your envy towards him and what a terrible person you are but hating Jimin with the justification that you are tkkr does make sense because Jimin is the "obstacle" of that ship. What they don't understand or one of the thousands of things the subgroup doesn't understand is that tkk's obstacle is not just Jimin. It's Jimin AND Jungkook and to some extent Tae, because Tae will always choose Jimin over everyone else, maybe not over Hobi but almost.
The subgroup hates Jimin because they simply can't stand that Jimin is almost perfect. The subgroup hates Jimin because he damages the toxic fantasy - not reality - that they insist on believing in. Hating Jimin is all about them. What they want and believe and not about tkk.
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pyxis.
dialogue prompt #9: “Cheer up it's Christmas Eve, sweetheart”
pairing: jimin x reader
genre: christmas au, brother's best friend au, fluff, childhood friends to lovers
word count: 3,412 (oh no)
warnings: reader is a lil sad but nothing angsty tho
summary: christmas was always an eager wait. less for the tree decorations, family dinner and the fuss of toddlers. more for your childhood best friend who you kissed under a mistletoe years back.
a/n: ahhh!!! I'm not completely satisfied with how this turned out to be. the inspiration was from a few christmas themed fics I read here and the movie ‘It's Christmas, Eve’. anyway this was my attempt though it's nowhere near christmas time. one of my personal goals is to celebrate a christmas like the west, the snow, the fuss and the commotion ;-;. Also I lost sense of time and space and this turned out to be 3k ;-;
masterlist
“Cheer up it's christmas eve, sweetheart”, your mother chimes as she pours brown batter into little cupcake moulds.
You simply smile at her, the festive mood not really getting to you because of exhaustion. Uni was tough, and enjoying this Christmas when you know you have tons of essays due in a few days was hammering inside your brain every now and then.
“Is that chocolate?”, you ask, leaning your tired body on the counter where she is at work.
“And orange”, she smiles, turning around to preheat the oven.
“Where's Jin”. Though you hated the routinely flicks against your forehead, the absence of your big brother felt weird.
“He went with Jimin to get the Christmas tree”.
The mention of Jimin brings a smile to your face. His soft features and captivating grin filling your head. If there was one of the few things you enjoyed coming back to your hometown for holidays, it's chocolate cupcakes your mom bakes and Jimin.
His family are friends with yours after all. You, Jin and Jimin attended the same school until college and other priorities in life drift you apart. Though the bond must have rusted a bit, you can't deny the fact that you still have that crush which started somewhere in middle school, on a chritmas eve like this when he kissed your cheeks shyly under the mistletoe. Your friends and family, and even Jimin himself must have seen it nothing more than platonic, but you still find yourself relieving the moment in your head however crazy it may sound.
Standing up straight, you decide to fix your bed hair and complete the skincare routine before the said duo drops.
“Mrs. Y/L/n...”, Jimin softly kicks the back door. He is carrying one end of a huge fir, and your brother on the other end, grunting from the freezing snow outside.
“Oh dear place it right there”, you mother is quick to her feet helping the boys and doing her usual commentary on how well the tree looked.
Jimin looks more handsome than ever, especially with his nose and cheeks dusted in scarlet from the cold. He looks really huggable in his fluffy sweaters and red beanie. Jin is busy commanding around so you choose to sit back, a very typical sibling energy and the size of decoration boxes and the tree itself not really appetizing to your will to find any strength.
“Hey Y/n!”, Jimin stares back at your eyes in a split moment which has your lashes fluttering suddenly. You probably look like you are carrying a disease and right now you become very hyper aware of that.
“You alright? You look tired”, he comments. You feel his eyes carefully studying the black under your eyes and worrying his mind because that's what he is like. He cares about everyone and everything, has a heart so soft it hurts to even think about it.
“Jet lag...”, you say, “I'll be fine”. You shoot a little thumbs up on his way to reassure.
“Why didn't Jin get the tree earlier? It's Christmas in a few hours”, you dodge the focus around you and walk near in an attempt to closely examine the tree for no reason other than feeling Jimin’s eyes a little too long on you.
Your brother gets visibly annoyed seeing you start a very unnecessary talk. So he is completely obliged to shoot back with, “Because you were in charge of Christmas decorations this year but your lazy ass flew down here only yesterday”.
“You know I was busy with Uni!”
“Whatever”, he shrugs, getting back to the box of tree decorations. You feel a little bad seeing yourself not being helpful during a festive season. It felt like you were procrastinating on your responsibilities as always.
“Um...is there any way I can help?”, you ask softly, earning a mischievous grin from Jin and your mom fills in the answer.
“We need more baubles. Also I missed out gifts for Aerum and June, so maybe you can get them”. Now this was already tiring and you were not lying earlier either, the jet lag was still choking you alive. You wonder if the huge pile of stars and glitters beside your foot aren't enough but then maybe it's true because this is the largest fir you ever saw for Christmas in your house. And speaking of the five year old notorious duo, your cousins-- Aerum and June, you have no other option than to step out into the butt numbing cold and get something for the sake of not getting your brains eaten.
While you stand there doing these calculations, Jimin puts a two and two and immediately suggests to tag along with you.
“That'd be great! Thanks sweetie”, your mom chimes, her fine lines of face gathering around her eyes while she does so and you catch her throwing a wink to your side and you pretend you never saw that.
“Thank you Jimin”, you smile in all honesty while he reciprocates the same.
“No problem. I'll get my car. Will you be ready in an hour? I think you just woke up”
“Uh...yeah”, you fake a laugh, “Yes I'll be ready in an hour”
Jimin still lives here in your hometown, attends a community college nearby and his house is just a few steps away from your own. You remember how you had the same analogy in your mind as well. You like living here. You like Jimin’s company. The lake Park and the annual ice skating competition in December and the bookstores and coffee shops at the outskirts of the town. And you can't seem to clearly remember when and where that feeling started to become foreign. Maybe it was a teenage quirk to explore the world that you are now a three hour flight away from all of this. It wasn't a deep regret, but seeing Jimin, it almost felt like it. It felt like you betrayed him. Because he seemed to be keeping his word to this day.
This year, it's a few degrees lower than what it usually is and you find yourself chattering your teeth together as you walk to Jimin’s house.
His footsteps rush to get the door as soon as you ring the doorbell and he greets with the same wide grin as if he hasn't just saw you an hour ago.
“Let's go?”, he asks immediately, getting house keys from his coat pocket and locking the front door before stepping out making you confused.
“There's no one home? Where are your parents?”
“Oh well didn't Mrs. Y/L/n tell you?”, he studies your features and gets his response so he continues “They went to New York this year for Christmas. It's some elder people thing I think...so I'll be spending Christmas this year with your family”
“Really!?”, you chime, and then immediately notice a very childish jump you did with tiny fists and all, feeling a little embarrassed at yourself, “Ah... uh I mean that's great”.
“Yeah”, he giggles, sounding like a twelve year old who is still waiting for his growth spurt, “Get in the car it's freezing in here”.
Since it's been six odd months you've spoken to Jimin, you figured it would would be strange and awkward to be with him, but his demeanor states otherwise. He could effortlessly begin conversations and build momentum with you and by the time you are at a thrift store, he is aware of the little gist of student life and the dramatically exaggerated history research paper still due.
“What are you getting for the twins?”, he asks, seeing you checking out the kids toys section with absolutely no idea and that's exactly what you reply to him.
“How about this puzzle?”, he brings a big jigsaw to your glance and you figure it's a great thing to have their little brains engaged and give yourself time to breathe.
“It's perfect!”, you add, immediately placing it your cart with a few decors you picked up from earlier aisles.
Jimin places an extra pack of Christmas candies in the cart, and you send him a questionable look knowing it's his way of bribing the kids coming this evening. He puts too much effort into people's happiness, something you wish you were capable of as well.
The shopping went smooth. It was therapeutic to get hot chocolate with extra marshmallows afterwards like he insisted followed by that very cliche movie scene where one of them develops a creme moustache and the other notices and dabs it off.
You want this moment to linger a little longer, but your whole family arrives in less than two hours and the decorations were due. If Jin doesn't have you in the next thirty minutes he might as well eat all the cupcakes your mom is baking as revenge.
“I had a great time”, Jimin states as he stops the car in front of your house, stealing the words from your mouth and warmth hugs your cheeks immediately.
“Me too. It's been long since we spent time with each other”
You hear a lone sigh with white fogs coming out of his plump lips while he does so, as if he were suddenly sad when you mentioned that.
“Are you okay?”
His grips tightens around the steering, “I've missed you”, he says, eyes meeting slowly. And as if he was suddenly pulled back to earth he conjures another sentence to not sound so vulnerable.
“I uh... It's just--”
“I've missed you too”
Even with the gear box painstakingly blocking the way, you throw your upper half towards his body anyways and you find him hugging you back. His hugs still feel the same from years back; safe and warm and filled with love.
If it wasn't for the constant reminder that your brother is probably plotting a murder against you, you would've stayed much longer in his embrace. Maybe the hug was a big straightforward for a bond still gradually blooming, but it didn't feel weird at all and when you pull back he is smiling down at you.
“I thought you two lovebirds flew off”, a very annoyed Jin states from above you. He is balancing himself on a chair to attach the mistletoe to the ceiling.
“Sorry hyung”, Jimin says. And somehow now you are getting super aware of the way your family is low key shipping you both. Not that it's an irritating thing of course though you seem to act like it. But you have no idea what's going on with Jimin, what if he said he missed you as your childhood friend? It's a lot difficult to segregate his priority of giving affection. He seems to be giving justice in terms of care for every living being he knows.
“The circus is on its way so I hope you both hurry with putting up everything together”, the voice above states, now lowering himself to ground after putting up the twig.
Three of you giggle at the mention of your family as a circus. Well in a way it definitely was. You have a bunch if uncles who crack awful jokes, a trait Jin himself as picked up from a tender age of ten. Then their wives and kids who share certainly the same braincells in comprehending things. You bet they'll ask you again about your major and your dating history once they walk in through that door amidst clearly stating everytime that you are a history major and yes still very single.
In the hallway there is a half decorated tree. A thread of fairly lights wrapped around the green and very few baubles hanging here and there.
“I'll put up the star and join you”, Jimin says, digging out a golden star from the carton. Though now he doesn't know why it was a good idea for him to announce that when both of you were almost the same height. He is just a few centimeters taller than you and the top of the fir is still very much way above your heads.
So with a chuckle you both figure Jin has to do it.
“This is your final year right?”, Jimin asks stepping closer to you. He seemed nervous about something. Or was it anxious?
“Yeah...you?”
“Yeah...”, his sweet tone was drawn almost like a whisper and you sense you should ask him further about what's wrong. But before you had to deal with a starter he continues,
“Are you planning to work in Chicago as well?”
“Sweetheart help me clean up the kitchen please”, your hear your mom's voice overpowering through the house. Which is good. Because you don't know what you are supposed to answer. It was as if he was almost hopeful that you'll choose your hometown all over again. But you aren't sure. So you take the opportunity to step away from the situation excusing yourself.
And while you are clearing the blobs of batter stuck on the counter, your mind is a haywire. What are you going to do? Though you know your whole family wants you to stay, it's still a foggy place to be in. Four years apart in another city as a college student has not provided much, except caffeine addiction and sleepless nights. Things were not even as fun as everyone told you.
A few steps away Jimin silently prays that you stay, because he had truly missed you. Even though you have outgrown from the eighteen year old shell as he had known, he finds himself actively choosing to be with you. Even when other things in life occupies his mind, there's an element of it which goes back to you.
“They are here!”. You groan silently, while your parents are throwing their hands in air, giggles and chatter fills in as your uncles and aunts and the taunting toddlers welcome themselves in.
“Y/n! You have grown so much!”, the older aunt comments, and you supply a manufactured smile to tag along. Other comments follow by soon, about how tired you are, gasps about not having a partner and future plans, all of which are not completely answerable at the moment but you manage to get through them all and finally excusing yourself back to the garage convincing there are more decor supplies in there.
Families are nice. They make festivals brighter and lives less lonely. But yours was just hard sometimes. Not that you completely loathed the people now fueling themselves off the cup cakes your mom bakes, you were just merely lost, still yet to come up with an answer to what your stance is after graduation.
“Hey...”. Jimin has joined you now which you notice feeling a warmth against your shoulder when he sits, with an extra scraf knowing the garage is still comparatively chilly than the house, “you okay?”.
“Yeah...I was just...thinking”
“Is this about earlier? I'm sorry if I made you anxious”, he quickly adds.
“No!...I mean yeah but, it's high time I find a ground with this. What are your plans?”
“I was thinking about teaching at Jefferson High”, he shifts rather uncomfortably. He is talking of the school in your town, your school, where you have lots of memories with Jimin, “You know...like we said during Junior year in high school?”
“I'm sorry Jimin”, you feel the guilt inside you growing, “I never kept my promises”.
“Hey...that's okay! Everyone changes. I just want you to be happy. I...I hope you are happy Y/n”, he reassures, taking your hand from your side and squeezing it between his soft palms.
“I don't know about that either...”
As much as you hated showcasing vulnerability to another person, you know Jimin is an exception. You had cried to him about everything during school days and he had never invalidated a single thing, even when you were visibly dramatic over a downpour during a family picnic when you were five.
Jimin is frozen on his seat as if he can't find the words. He was never good with words so instead he hugs you, a little longer than the last time till he is sure you have calmed down. Grateful for not ending up crying, you smile up at him and remind yourselves to get back inside to avoid suspicion, especially from the kids who take humiliating people as an important milestone to achieve.
When you enter back inside and get immediately surrounded by a million questions and chores thrown at you, you find your answer. Maybe your heart belongs back to everything your younger self had blabbered about. Not to mention, this fairly good reunion with your crush feels nice, though, he might still see it as platonic. Maybe he makes things less daunting.
By the way Jimin was owning everyone's heart in the house, it felt like he was family. Well in a way he is. But to put more clarity, he bought things together and his actions bought so much peace and love within everyone. Even the notorious twins listen carefully to him and help the uncles and aunts in the kitchen.
He is again by your side, two cupcakes rests on his palms and you take it with a silent ‘thanks’.
Seeing no signs of him beginning a talk now, you think of coming up with something. Maybe a memoir from today? Or about how absolutely handsome he looks right now? Wait.
“They are under the kissing twig!”, Aerum screams like the house caught in fire, her sibling joining by the side to provoke the habit even more.
“It's called a mistletoe Aerum”, your aunt corrects before pasting a smug across her lips.
Nothing changed. They are the same people. Hyping you and Jimin to kiss just like when you were thirteen. If the factor of time is removed, this is the exact night. Both of you cemented to the flooring as if you forgot to exist.
Both of your necks snap together to the mistletoe Jin had attached to the ceiling earlier. And when you lower your gaze back, face gawks at each other eye to eye. It's the same. He has that blush, the shyness from years ago. It's going to be platonic. Yet again. And this moment will only ever be romantic and flowery in your head.
June was the first to squeak, and Aerum shuts her eyes the moment Jimin is leaning his mouth towards your lips. It was difficult to relax under the stares of many, but when he ghosts his mouth over your again and leans in for a second kiss, you are fixated on him. Hands holding each other, the plump of his lips so soft it felt like you were biting into a fluff of cloud.
Maybe he'll have an explanation to your family for this. Not like anyone in the audience was disappointed. Your mother was almost in tears? And Jin looked hardly surprised with any of this. As if it was all swell according to his plans.
“You both are so cute”, one of the aunts awes and your mother is quick by her side, completely agreeing to it.
“Jimin...”, you return your gaze to the equally flustered man who just kissed you and he sounded almost breathless,
“I'm sorry if this was wrong it ju--”
“I like you”, you immediately snap in and his face is a void for an instant. Fully processing the words, his eyes disappear when he grins, “I like you too...a lot”.
“Are you two dating?”, the twins haven't dropped the case yet, running to your feet to help their curious brains.
“Yes...”, Jimin responds, looking up at you for a reassurance, which you quickly supply with a nod, “Yes we are dating”.
When the kids are satisfied they go away snickering to themselves.
“I decided to stay”, you say.
“Really!?”, his disbelief was comical, yet wholesome considering how much he wished for this, “I'm...I'm so happy!”.
Giggling at him, this time you lean forward and peck the corner of his lips.
“You lovebirds better get a room”, Jin announces and thankfully not loud enough to catch everyone else's attention.
Usually Jin expects a punch to his arms from his sister, but he sees how grateful you are for his mistletoe decor. He leaves the couple, satisfied that there won't be any more ranting about how much Jimin likes you.
Thank you so much for reading!! ♡♡
Original Content of ©bangtanpromptsfics
#bts#bts fanfic#bts fluff#bts scenarios#bts x reader#bts ff#fan fiction#fluff prompts#bts jimin#park jimin#jimin#jimin fluff#jimin scenarios#jimin x reader#jimin x y/n#jimin ff#christmas au#genre: f2l#bts f2l#bts fic#writing prompt#otp prompts#soft fic#jimin fic#park jimin x oc#park jimin x reader#park jimin x you#park jimin x y/n#park jimin scenario#park jimin fluff
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McQueen: OK... Here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. McQueen: One winner. 42 losers. I eat losers for breakfast. McQueen: Breakfast. Wait, maybe I should have had breakfast. A little breck-y could be good for me. No,no,no, stay focused. Speed. McQueen: I'm faster than fast. Quicker than quick. I am Lightning! Mack: (knock-knock)Hey Lightning, are you ready? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready. Song McQueen: Ka-chow! Song Seller: Get your antenna here! Fans: You got that right, Slick. Bob Cutlass: Welcome back to the Dinoco 400. I'm Bob Cutlass, here with my good friend, Darrel Cartrip. We're midway through what may turn out to be a historic day for racing. Darrel Cartrip: Bob, my oil pressure's through the roof right now. If this gets more exciting, they're gonna have to tow me outta the booth! Bob Cutlass: Right you are, Darrell. Three cars are tied for the season points lead, heading into the final race of the season. And the winner of this race Darrell, will win the season title and, the Piston Cup. Does The King, Strip Weathers, have one more victory in him before retirement? Darrell: He's been Dinoco's golden boy for years! Can he win them one last Piston Cup? Bob: And, as always, in the second place spot we find Chick Hicks. He's been chasing that tailfin his entire career. Darrell: Chick thought this was his year, Bob. His chance to finally emerge from The King's shadow. But the last thing he expected was...Lightning McQueen! Bob: You know, I don't think anybody expected this. The rookie sensation come into the season unknown. But everyone knows him now. Darrell: Will he be the first rookie to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco? Bob: The legend, the runner up, and the rookie! Three cars, one champion! Song Chick: No you don't. Fans: Oohh. What a ride! Chick: Hahaha Fans: Go get'em, McQueen! Go get'em! Fans: We love you, Lightning! Chick: Dinoco is all mine. Race car: Ahhhh! Darrell: Trouble, turn three! Chick: Haha. Get through that, Mcqueen. Bob: Ouw.. A huge crash behind the leaders! Fans: Wahh!! Bob: Wait a second, Darrell. McQueen is in the wreckage. Darrell: There's no way the rookie can make it through! Not in one piece that is. Mia & Tia: Lightning, ahhh. Darrell: Look at that, McQueen made it through! Bob: Man, a spectacular move by Lightning McQueen. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Fans: McQueen (7X) Fan: Yeah McQueen! Ka-chow! Bob: While everyone else heads into the pits, McQueen stays out to take the lead! Broken car: Don't take me out coach. I can still race! Chick: Haha. What do you think boys? A thing of beauty. Chick's coach: McQueen made it through! Chick: What? Chick's coach: He's not pitting! Chick: Come on! Get me out there! Let's go! Get me back out there! Come on! Bob: McQueen's not going into the pits! Darrell: You know the rookie just fired his crew chief. That's the third one this season! Bob: Well he says he likes working alone Darrell. Chick's coach: Go, go, go! Bob: Looks like Chick got caught up in the pits. Darrell: Yeah, after a stop like that, he's got a lot of ground to make up.Get ready boys, we're coming to the restart! Chick: Come on, come on, come on! McQueen's crew: We need tires now! Come on, let's go! McQueen: No,no,no,no! No tires, just gas! McQueen's crew: What! You need tires, you idiot! Darrell: Looks like it's all gas-and-go's for McQueen today. Bob: That's right. No tires again. Darrell: Normally I said a short-term gain, long-term loss, but it's sure is workin' for him. He obviously knows somethin' we don't know. Bob: This is it Darrell, one lap to go and Lightning McQueen has a huge lead. Darrell: All he's got it in the bag. Call in the dogs and put out the fire! We're gonna crown us a new champion! McQueen: Checkered flag, here I come! Darrell: Oh, no! McQueen has blown a tire! Bob: And with only one turn to go! Can he make it? McQueen's crew: You fool! The King's Coach: McQueen's blown a tire!, McQueen's blown a tire! Go,go,go! Darrell: He lost another tire! The King and Chick are coming up fast! Bob: They're entering turn three! McQueen: Come on. Darrell: I don't belive what I'm watching, Bob! Darrell: Lightning McQueen is hundred feet from his Piston Cup! Bob: The King and Chick rounding turn four. Darrell: Down the stretch they come! And it's, and it's... Bob: It's too close to call! Too close to call! Darrell: I don't belive it! (2X) Mia & Tia: Lightning! Bob: The most spectacular, amazing unequivocally, unbelievable ending in the history of the world! And we don't even know who won! Darrell: Look at that! Security: Hey, no cameras! Get outta here! Kori Turbowitz: We're here in Victory Lane, awaiting the race results. McQueen that was quite a risky move, not taking tires. McQueen crew: Tell me about it. Kori Turbowitz: Are you sorry you don't have a crew chief out there? McQueen's Crew: Hah! McQueen: Oh Kori. There's a lot more to racing than just winning. I mean, taking the race by a full lap... Where's the entertainment in that? No no no... I wanted to give folks a little sizzle. McQueen's crew: Sizzle? McQueen: Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief? No, I'm not. Cause I'm a one-man show. McQueen crew: Whats? Oh, yeah right. Kori Turbowitz: That was a very confident Lightning McQueen. Coming to you live from Victory Lane, I'm Kori Turbowitz. Cameramen: Hey, get out of the shot! McQueen: Yo, Chuck, what are you doing? You're blocking the camera. Everyone wants to see the bolt. McQuenn crew: What? McQueen: Now, back away. McQueen's crew: Ahh! That's it. Come on guys. McQueen: Whoa, team! Where are going? McQueen's crew: We quit, Mr. One-Man Show! McQueen: Oh, OK, leave. Fine. Hahaha. How will I ever find anyone else who knows how to fill me up with gas? Adios Chuck! McQueen's crew: And my name is not Chuck! McQueen: Oh, whatever. Chuck: Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen! Seriously, that was some pretty darn nice racin' out there. By me! Hahaha! Chick's crew: Zinger Chick: Welcome to the Chick era, baby! The Piston Cup... It's mine dude. It's mine. Hey fellas, how do you think I'm look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue! Hahaha! McQueen: In your dreams Thunder. Chick: Yeah, right. Thunder? What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"? McQueen: You know, cause' thunder always comes after lightning. Pew, Kaka-phow! Chick: Who here knew about the thunder thing? Chick's crew: I didn't. Cameramen: Give us the bolt! Cameramen: That's right. Cameramen: Right in the lens. Cameramen: Show me the bolt, baby! Cameramen: Smile, McQueen! Cameramen: Show me the bolt, McQueen! Cameramen: That's it! Tex: Ohh we, that was one close finish. You sure made Dinoco proud. Thank you, King. The King: Well, Tex, you've been good to me all these years. It's the least I could do. Dear: Whatever happens, you're winner to me, you old daddy rabbit. The King: Thanks, dear. We wouldn't be nothing without you. Mia: I'm Mia. Tia: I'm Tia. Mia & Tia: We're like your biggest fans! Ka-chow! McQueen: I love being me. Security: OK, girls, that's it. Mia & Tia: We love you, Lightning! Some guys far away: We love you more!! The King: Hey, buddy. You're one gutsy racer. McQueen: Oh, hey, Mr. The King. The King: You got more talent in one lug nut than a lot of cars has got in their whole body. McQueen: Really? Oh, that... The King: But you're stupid. McQueen: Excuse me? The King: This ain't a one-man deal, kid. You need to wise-up and get you self a good crew chief and a good team. And you ain't gonna win unless you got good folks behind you, and you let them do their job, like they should. Like I tell the boys at the shop... McQueen: A good team. Yeahhh. Dreaming Song. Mia & Tia: Oh, McQueen. The King: If you figure that out, you just gonna be OK. McQueen: Oh, yeah, that.. That is spectacular advice. Thank you Mr. The King. Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Piston Cup history... McQueen: A rookie has won the Piston Cup. Yes!! Speaker: We have a three-way tie. Chick: Oh, ho. Hey, McQueen, that must be really embarrassing. But I wouldn't be worry about it. Because I didn't do it! Hahaha! Speaker: Piston Cup officials have determined that a tiebreaker race between the three leaders will be held in California in one week. Chick: Well, thank you! Thanks to all of you out there! Thank you! Hey, rook, first one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ahh! No, not me! No, you rock, and you know that! Balloon: Oh, yeah! Woaah!! McQueen: First one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ohh, we'll see who gets there first, Chick. Huh? Mack: Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie. McQueen: I don't want to talk about it. Come on, let's go, Mack. Saddle up. What'd you do with my trailer? Mack: I parked it at your sponsor's tent. McQueen: What? Mack: You gotta make your personal appearance. McQueen: No. No! No,no,no,no! McQueen: Yes, yes, yes! Lightning McQueen here. And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula! Nothing soothes rusty bumper like Rust-eze. McQueen: Wow! Look at that shine! Use Rust-eze and you too can look like me! Ka-chow! Rust-eze Car: Hahaha. I met this car from Swampscott. He was so rusty he didn't even cast a shadow. Rust-eze Van: You could see his dirty undercarriage. Hahaha. McQueen: Uahh! I hate rusty cars. This is not good for my image. Mack: They did give you your big break. Besides, it's in your contract. McQueen: Oh, will you stop please? Just go get hooked up. Rust-eze Van: Winter is a grand old time. Rust-eze Car: Of this there are no ifs or buts. Rust-eze Van: But remember, all that salt and grime... Rust-eze Car: Can rust your bolts and freeze your... Rust-eze Van: Hey look! There he is! Our almost champ! Victory ran to your rear end in here, kid. Fan: Lightning McQueen, you are wicked fast! Fan: That race was a pisser! Fan: You were booking McQueen! McQueen: Give me a little room guys. Fred: You're my hero Mr.McQueen. McQueen: Yes, I know. Fred, Fred, thank you. Fred: He knows my name. He knows my name! Rust-eze Van: Looking good, Freddie! Rust-eze Car: Thanks to you Lightning, we had a banner year! Rust-eze Van: We might clear enough to buy you some headlights. Rust-eze Car: Are you saying he doesn't have headlights? Rust-eze Van: That's what I'm telling ya. It's just stickers! McQueen: Well, you know, racecars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit. Rust-eze Car: Yeah, well,so is my brother, but he still needs headlights. Hahaha McQueen: Hahaha! Ha!! Hahaha!! Rust-eze Car: Ladies and gentlemen, Lightning McQueen! Fans: Free Bird! McQueen: You know, the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment team ran a great race today. And remember, with a little Rust-eze...And an insane amount of luck, you too can look like me. Ka-chow. Rust-eze Car: Hey, kid. Rust-eze Van: We love ya. And we're looking forward to another great year. Just like this year. Hahaha. McQueen: Not on your life. Rust-eze Car: Don't drive like my brother! Rust-eze Van: Oh Yeah, don't drive like my brother! Mack: California, here we come! McQueen: Dinoco, here we come! Song McQueen: I needed this. Hello? Harv: Is this Lightning McQueen, the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is this Harv, the world's greatest agent? Harv: And it is such a honor to be your agent and it almost hurts to take ten percent of your winnings and merchandising. And ancillary rights in perpetuity. Anyway, what a race! Hot champ! I didn't see it, but I heard you were great. McQueen: Thanks, Harv. Harv: Listen, they're giving you 20 tickets for the tiebreaker thing in Cali. I'll pass 'em on to your friends. You shoot me the names. You let Harv rock it for you. All right, baby? McQueen: Right. Friends. Yes, there's a... Harv: OK, I get it, Mr.Popular. So many friends you can't even narrow it down. Hey, when you get to town, you better make time for your best friend! You gotta break bread with your mishpoacheh here! McQueen: Yeah, yeah, that'd be great! We should totally... Harv: Ok, I gotta jump, kid. Let me know how it goes. I'm out. McQueen: What? A minivan? Oh, come on Mack, you're in the slow lane. This is Lightning McQueen you're hauling here Mack: Just stopping off for a quick breather, kid. Old Mack needs a rest. McQueen: Absolutely not. McQueen: We're driving straight to all night till we get to California. We agreed to it. Mack: All night? May I remind you, federal DOT regs state... McQueen: Come on, I need to get there before Chick get hang with Dinoco. Mack: Ahh, all those sleeping trucks. Hey kid, I don't know if I can make it. McQueen: Oh, sure you can, Mack. Look, it'll be easy. I'll stay up with you. Mack: All night? McQueen: All night long. McQueen: Zzzzz... DJ Song Snot Rod: Ah, ahh, achowww! Wingo: Hahaha! Boost: Hey, yo, DJ. DJ: What up? Boost: We got ourselves a nodder. DJ: Hahaha. Mack: Pretty music. Boost: Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man. Wingo: Right back at ya! Hahaha. Snot Rod: Yeah! Boost: Oops! I missed. Snot Rod: You going on vacation? Tuner team: Hahaha. Boost: Oh, no, Snot Rod... Wingo: He's gonna blow! Snot Rod: Ahh...ahhh...ahhh...achoowww!!! Mack: Gesundheit! Hoho. One should never drive while drowsy. McQueen: MACK! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Hey,Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack,wait for me! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack... McQueen:...wait up! Mack. McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: What?You're not Mack. Peterbilt: Mack?I ain't no Mack!I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake! Peterbilt: Turn on your lights, you moron! McQueen: Mack... The Interstate! Sheriff: Ahh!. Not in my town, you don't. McQueen: Oh, no...Oh, maybe he can help me! He's shooting at me! Why is he shooting at me! Sheriff: I haven't gone this fast in years. I'm gonna blow a gasket or somethin'. McQueen: Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine! Sheriff: What in the blue blazes? Crazy hot rodder. Filmore: I'm telling you, man, every third blink is slower. Sarge: The sixties weren't good for you, were they? McQueen: What? That's not the Interstate! Ahh ho, Auw, auw,auw! Ahhhh! No, no, no, no! Filmore: I'm not the only seeing this, right? Sarge: Incoming! Filmore: Whoa man. Sarge: No! Ramone: Hey, you scratch my paint! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Luigi: My tires! McQueen: Phoah! Red: Huh! McQueen: Uargh! Red: Huh! Filmore: Fly away, Stanley. Be free! Sheriff: Boy, you're in a heap of trouble. Kori Turbowitz: We're live at the Los Angeles International Speedway as the first competitor, Lightning McQueen, is arriving at the track. Cameramen: Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl? Cameramen: Lightning, what's your strategy? Woahh! Mack: What? Did I forget to wipe my mud flaps? News: McQueen's driver arrived in California, but McQueen was missing. News: Racecar Lightning McQueen was reported missing. News: He scheduled to race an unprecedented... News: Sponsor stated they have no idea where he is. Junior: I hope Lightning's OK. I sure hate to see anything bad happen to him. Jay Limo: I don't know what's harder to find, Lightning McQueen or a crew chief who'll work for him! Hummer: Lightning McQueen must be found at all costs! News: They're all asking the same question: Where is McQueen? McQueen: Oh, boy. Where am I? Mater: Mornin', sleepin' beauty! McQueen: Ahhhhh!! Mater: Hahaha! Boy, I was wonderin' when you was gonna wake up. McQueen: Take whatever you want! Just don't hurt me! a parking boot? Why do I have a parking boot on? What's going on here? Please! Mater: You're funny. I like you already. My name's Mater. McQueen: Mater. Mater: Yeah, like "tuh-mater", but without the "tuh". What's your name? McQueen: You don't know my name? Mater: Uhh, no, I know your name. Is your name Mater too? McQueen: What? Look, I need to get to California as fast as possible. Where am I? Mater: Where are you? Shoot! You're in Radiator Springs. The cutest little town in Carburetor County. McQueen: Oh, great. Just great! Mater: Well, if you think that's great, you should see the rest of the town. McQueen: You know, I'd love to see the rest of the town! So if you could just open the gate, take this boot off, you and me, we go cruisin', check out the local scene... Mater: Dad-gum! McQueen: How'd that be, Tuh-Mater? Mater: Cool Sheriff: Mater! What did I tell you about talkin' to the accused? Mater: To not to. Sheriff: Well, quit yer yappin' and tow this delinquent road hazard to traffic court. Mater: Well, we'll talk later, Mater. Haha. "Later, Mater." That's funny! Sheriff: The Radiator Springs Traffic Court will come to order! Ramone: Hey, you scratched my paint! I ought take a blowtorch to you, man! Luigi: You broke-a the road! You a very bad car! Fillmore: Fascist! Commie! McQueen: Officer, talk to me, babe. How long is this gonna take? I gotta get to California, pronto. Sheriff: Where's your lawyer? McQueen: Tuh, I don't know. Tahiti maybe. He's got a timeshare there. Sheriff: When a defendant has no lawyer, the court will assign one to him. Hey! Anyone want to be his lawyer? Mater: Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff! Sheriff: All rise! The Honorable Doc Hudson presiding. Luigi: Show-off. Sheriff: May Doc have mercy on your soul. Doc Hudson: All right, I wanna know who's responsible for wreckin' my town, Sheriff. I wanna his hood on a platter! I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots! No, check that. I'm gonna put him in jail till the jail rots on top of him, and then I'm gonna move him to a new jail and let that jail rot. I'm... Throw him out of here, Sheriff. I want him out of my courtroom. I want him out of our town! Case dismissed. McQueen: Yes! Mater: Boy, I'm purty good at this lawyerin' stuff. Sally: Sorry I'm late, Your Honor! McQueen: Holy Porsche! She's gotta be from my attorney's office. Hey, thanks for comin', we're all set. He's letting me go. Sally: He's letting you go? McQueen: Yeah, your job's pretty easy today. All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at you. Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Me, you, dinner. Ka-chow! Sally: What the...? Auww! Please! McQueen: I know, I get that reaction a lot. I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand. Sally: Ohhh, auww! McQueen: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you? Mater: Well, a little bit, but I'll be alright. Sally: OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge. McQueen: Do what you gotta do, baby. Oh, but listen. Be careful. Folks around here are not firing on all cylinders, if you know what I mean. Mater: Ka-ching! Auww! Sally: I'll keep that in mind. Hey there, Mater. Mater: Howdy, Sally. Sally: Hi, folks! Folks: Good morning! Sally. McQueen: You know her? Mater: She's the town attorney and my fiancee. McQueen: What? Mater: Nah, I'm just kiddin'. She just like me for my body. Sally: Doc, you look great this morning. Did you do something different with your side view mirrors? Doc: What do you want, Sally? Sally: Ah, come on, make this guy fix the road. The town needs this. Doc: No. I know his type. Racecar. That's the last thing this town needs. Sally: OK, I didn't want to have to do this, Doc, but you leave me no choice. Fellow citizens, you're all aware of our town's proud history. Doc: Here she goes again. Sally: Radiator Springs, the glorious jewel strung on the necklage of Route 66, the mother road! It is our job and our pleasure to take care of the travelers on our stretch of that road. Sarge: Travelers? What travelers? Filmore: Ignore him. Sally: But how, I ask you, are we to care for those travelers if there is no road for them to drive on? Luigi, what do you have at your store? Luigi: Tires Sally: And if no one can get to you? Luigi: I won't sell any...tires. I will lose everything! Ohho. Sally: Flo, what do you have at your store? Flo: I have gas. Lotsa gas! Sally: OK boys, stay with me. And, and, Flo, what'll happen if no one can come to your station to buy gas? Flo: I'll go outta business and... we'll have to leave town. Sally: And what's gonna happen to all of us if Flo leaves town and closes her station? Folks: Without gas, we're done for! Lizzie: What? Sally: So, don't you think the car responsible should fix our road? Lizzie: The only guy strong enough to fix that road is Big Al! Ramone: Lizzie, the guy left, like, 15 years ago. Lizzie: Then why are you bringing him up, you lemon? Sally: Oh, he can do it. He's got the horsepower. So, what do you want him to do? Folks: Fix the road! Sally: Because we are a town worth fixing! Folks: Yeah!!! Doc: Order in the court! Seems like my mind has been changed for me. Folks: Yeah!! McQueen: No! Filmore: Nice rulin'. McQueen: Ohh, I am so not take you to dinner. Sally: That's OK, Stickers. You can take Bessie. Mater: Oh man, you got to work with Bessie! I'd give my left two lug nuts for somethin' like that. McQueen: Bessie? Who's Bessie? Doc: This here is Bessie, finest road-pavin' machine ever built. I'm hereby sentencing you to community service. You're gonna fix the road under my supervision. McQueen: What? This place is crazy! Mater: Hey, I know this may be a bad time right now, but tha, you owe me $32,000 in legal fees. McQueen: What? Doc: So we're gonna hitch you up to sweet Bessie, and you're gonna pull her nice. McQueen: You're gotta be kidding me. Doc: You start there where the road begins, you finish down there where the road ends. Mater: Holy shoot! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa! How long is this gonna take? Doc: Well, fella does it right, should take him about five days. McQueen: Five days? But I should be in California schmoozing Dinoco right now! Doc: Then if I were you, I'd quit yappin and start workin'! Hook him up, Mater. Mater: Okay-dokey. McQueen: Freedom!! Mater: Maybe I should've-a hooked him up to Bessie...and then-a...then took the boot off. McQueen: Wuuuhuuu! Goodbye, Radiator Springs, and goodbye, Bessie! California, here I come! Yeah! Oh, fell that wind. Yes! No,no,no,no! Outta gas? How can I be outta gas? Sheriff: Hahaha. Boy, we ain't as dumb as you think we are. McQueen: But,but,but how did, how did...you...? Sally: We siphoned your gas while you were passed out. Ka-chow. McQueen: Auw,auw,auw,auw,auwww!! Sheriff: Hahaha. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Sarge: Sheriff. Filmore: Hai, Sheriff. Luigi: Why the tires are here? Guido: Sono sempre stati qui. Luigi: They were better well before. Guido: Stai sempre a parlare. Luigi: Guido! Lizzie: Red, can you move over? I want to get look at that sexy hot rod. Mater: You know, I used to be a purty good whistler. I can't do it now of course, on account of sometimes I get fluid built up in my engine block, but Doc said he's gonna fix it dough. He can fix about anything. That's why we made him the judge. Boy, you shoulda heard me on Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow. Now, I'm not one to brag, but people come purty far to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow". McQueen: Ah? Ah, man, that's just great! Mater: Hey, what's wrong? McQueen: My lucky sticker's all dirty. Mater: Thaah, that ain't nothin'. I'll clean it for ya. McQueen: No,no,no! That wouldn't be necessary. Hey! Hey, big fella! Yeah, you in the red! I could use a little hose down. Help me wash this off. What, where's he goin'? Mater: Oh, he's still a little bit shy, and he hates you for killin' his flowers. McQueen: I shouldn't have to put up with this. I'm a precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics. Mater: You hurt your what? McQueen: I'm a very famous racecar! Luigi: You are a famous racecar? A real racecar? McQueen: Yes, I'm a real racecar. What do you think? Look at me. Luigi: I have followed racing my entire life of my whole life! McQueen: Then you know who I am. I'm Lightning McQueen. Luigi: Lightening McQueen! McQueen: Yes! Yes! Luigi: I must scream it to the world! My excitement from the top of someplace very high! Do you know many Ferraris? McQueen: No,no,no. They race on the European circuit. I'm in the Piston Cup! What? Luigi: Luigi follow only the Ferraris. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Customers. Customers! Customers, everyone! Customers! OK. Lizzie: Customers? Sally: All right, everybody calm down for a long time. Just remember what we rehearsed. Make sure your "Open, please come in" signs are out. And you all know what to do. All right, nobody panics. Here we go! Minny: Van, I just don't see any on-ramp anywhere. Van: Minny, I know exactly where we are. Minny: Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere. Van: Honey, please. Sally: Hello. Welcome to Radiator Springs, gateway to Ornament Valley. Legendary for it's quality service and friendly hospitality. How can we help you? Van: We don't need anything, thank you very much. Minny: Whoa, honey ask her direction to the Interstate. Van: There's no need to ask for directions. Minny, I know exactly where we're going. Minny: He did the same thing on our trip to Shakopee. You know, we were headed over there for the Crazy Days, and we... Van: OK,OK. Really. We're just peachy, OK? Filmore: What you really need is the sweet taste of my homemade, organic fuel. Van: No, it doesn't agree with my tank. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Sarge: Good to see you, Soldier! Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut for all your government surplus needs. Minny: Ohh, honey, surplus! Van: I think we have too much surplus. Sally: I do have a map over the Cozy Cone Motel. And if you do stay, we offer a free Lincoln Continental breakfast. Minny: Honey, she's got a map. Van: I don't need a map! I have the GPS. Never need a map again, thank you. Flo: How 'bout somethin' to drink? Stop at Flo's V8 Cafe. Finest fuel on Route 66. Van: No, we just top off. Luigi: And if you need tires, stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires, home of the Leaning Tower of Tires. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Ramone: But you do need a paint job man. Ramone will paint you up right. Hey, anything you want! You know, like a flame job. Minny: No, thanks... Ramone: Maybe ghost flames! You like old school pinstripin'? Von Dutch style ha? Minny: Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch. Van: Oh, ho, OK, no. Ahahaha. We're gonna be going now, OK? Auww! Lizzie: A little somethin' to remember us by, OK? Van: Oh,ha,ha. OK! Sally: Come back soon, OK? I mean, you know where we are! Tell your friends! Van: HohohOK! Yes. You bet. Minny: Thanks again, folks. Bye-bye now. McQueen: Psst! Psst! Hey! Hey, hey,hey! I know how to get to the Interstate! Minny: Oh, do ya? Van: Minny, no. McQueen: Yeah, yeah,yeah. No, not really. But listen. I'm Lightning McQueen, the famous racecar. I'm being held heren against my will. And I need you to call my team, so they can rescue me, and get me to California in time for me to win The Piston Cup. Do you understand? McQueen: No,no,no,no,no. No, It's the truth! I'm telling you! You gotta help me! Don't leave me here! I'm in hillbilly hell! My IQ's dropping by the second! I'm becoming one of them! Sally: OK, don't worry. They know where we are now. They're gonna tell their friends. You'll see. Radio: And we'll be back for our Hank Williams marathon... Sally: That's good. Radio:...after a Piston Cup update. Still no sign of Lightning McQueen. Meanwhile, Chick Hicks arrived in California and today became the first car to spend practice time on the track. Chick: Yeah, well it's just nice to get out here before the other competitors. You know, get a headstart. Gives me an edge. Dreaming Song Chick: Yeah. Chick: Hey, McQueen... Eat your heart out. McQueen: Mater, let me get this straight. I can go when this road is done. That's the deal, right? Mater: That's what they done did said. McQueen: OK. Outta my way. I got a road to finish. Mater: He's done! Doc: Done? Mater: Ahmhm. Doc: It's only been an hour. McQueen: I'm done. Look, I'm finished. Just say thank you, and I'll be on my way. That's all I gotta say. Mater: Weehoo! I'm the first one on the new road! Ahho! It rides purty smooth. Sally: It looks awful! McQueen: Well, it matches the rest of the town. Sally: Ahh. Red: Umph, huhuhuh. Sally: Red. Who do you think you are? McQueen: Look, Doc said when I finish, I could go. That was the deal. Doc: The deal was you fix the road, not making it worse. Now, scrape it off! Start over again. McQueen: Hey, look, grandpa, I'm not a bulldozer. I'm a racecar. Doc: Hohoho. Is that right? Then why don't we just have a little race? Me and you. Sally: What? McQueen: Hohoho. Me and you. Is that a joke? Doc: If you win, you go and I fix the road. If I win, you do the road my way. Sheriff: Doc, what're you doin'? McQueen: Hahaha. I don't mean to be rude here Doc, but you probably go zero to sixty in like what? Three-point-five years? Doc: Then I reckon you ain't got nothin' to worry about. McQueen: You know what old timer? That's a wonderful idea. Let's race. Sheriff: Gentlemen, this will be a one-lap race. You will drive to Willy's Butte, go around Willy's Butte and come back. There will be no bumpin', no cheatin', no spittin', no bittin', no road rage, no maimin', no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin', no backstabbin', no road-hoggin' and no lollygaggin'. McQueen: Speed. I'm speed. Float like a Cadillac, sting like a Beemer. Luigi: OhHohohoo. My friend Guido, he dream to give a real racecar a pit stop. Guido: Pit stop. McQueen: Aa, haha. The race is only one lap, guys. Uno lappo! Don't need any help. I work solo mio. Luigi: Fine. Race your way. McQueen: No pit stoppo. Comprendo? Guido: OK. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Start your engines! Ramone: Hijole! Check that out! Filmore: Whoa. Flo: Emm, emm. Sally: Great idea, Doc. Now the road will never get done. Sheriff: Luigi. Luigi: Hohoho. On your mark, get set. Uno for the money, due for the show, tre to get ready, and quattro to... I can't belive it. Go!! Hahaha. Doc: Yehaa! Hahaha! Sally: Yeah. Luigi: Huh? Doc, the flag means go. Remember the flag. Here we go. Go. Ramone: Uhh, Doc, what are you doing, man? Doc: Oh, dear. It would seem I'm off to a poor start. Well, better late than never. Come on, Mater. Might need a little help. Mater: Ahh, OK. Doc: You got your tow cable? Mater: Well, yeah. I always got my tow cable. Why? Doc: Ohh, just in case. McQueen: Ahh,auw,auw,auw,no,no,no,no,no! Ramone: Oh, man! Auww!! Filmore: Whoa. Bad trip, man. Doc: Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac, or was that stingin' like a Beemer? I'm confused. Mater: Eh,eh,eh. Doc: You drive like you fix roads. Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater McQueen: Ahhh! Mater: I'm startin' to think he knowed you was gonna crash! McQueen: Thank you, Mater. Thank you. McQueen: I can make a little turn on dirt. You think? No. And now I'm a day behind. I'm never gonna get outta here! Ramone: Hey, ese! You need a new paint job, man! McQueen: No, thank you. Filmore: How 'bout some organic fuel? Sarge: That freak juice? McQueen: Pass. Flo: Whooh, watchin' him workin' is makin' me thirsty. Anybody else want somethin' to drink? Mater: Nah, not me, Flo. I'm on one of them there special diets. I'm a precisional instrument of speed and aero-matics. McQueen: "You race like you fix roads." I'll show him. I will show him! McQueen: Great! I hate it! Hate, hate, hate, hate it!! Doc: Haha. Music. Sweet music. Sally: Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. McQueen: Radiator Springs, a happy place. Bessie: Peckkk. McQueen: Whoa, OK, Bessie you think that funny? Great! I'm talking to Bessie now! I'm talkin to Bessie!! Mater: Hahaha. Sally: Wow. Mater: Mornin', Sally! Hey, look at this here fancy new road that Lightnin' McQueen done just made! Sally: Yes! Amazing! Ramone: Yeah! Flo: Ohh, Ramone, Mama ain't seen you that low in years. Ramone: I haven't seen a road like this in years. Flo: Well, then let's cruise, baby. Ramone: Low and slow. Luigi: E Bellissima! It's beautiful! Guido, look, it's a like it was paved by angels. Ohhh. Mater: Oh, I tell you what. I bet even the roads on the moon ain't this smooth. Sally: Doc, look at this. Shoulda tossed him into the cactus a lot sooner, huh? Doc: Well, he ain't finished yet. Still got a long way to go. Luigi: Guido, look at Luigi! Hahaha. This is fantastico! Sally: That looks like fun! Mater, I got dibs, next turn! Lizzie: Hey, Luigi, this new road makes your place look like a dump. Luigi: Ahhh, that crazy old devil woman. Ohh, ohh. She's right! Sally: Ohh, ahh! Luigi: Guido! Doc: That punk actually did a good jab. Well, now... where the hack is he? Doc: Sheriff! Is he makin' another run for it? Sheriff: No,no. He ran outta asphalt in the middle of the night, asked me if he could come down here. All he's tryin' to do is make that there turn. McQueen: No,no,no,no! Ohh, great. Perfect turns on every track I've ever raced on. Doc: Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself a quart of oil at Flo's. Doc: I'll keep an eye on him. Sheriff: Well, thanks, Doc. I've been feelin' a quart low. McQueen: Ahhhhh! Phuahh, thahh! Doc: This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt. McQueen: Oh, great. What do you want? You hear to gloat? Doc: You don't have three-wheel brakes, so you got to pitch it hard, break it loose and then just drive it with the throttle. Give it too much, you'll be outta the dirt and into the tulips. McQueen: So you're a judge, a doctor and a racing expert. Doc: I'll put it simple. If you goin' hard enough left, you'll find yourself turnin' right. McQueen: Ooo, right. That makes perfect sense. Turn right to go left. Yes! Thank you! Or should I say,"No thank you"? Because in Opposite World, maybe that really means, "Thank you"! Tuh, crazy grandpa car. What an idiot! Doc: Ahhh. McQueen: Turn right to go left. Oh. Whoa, auwwww. Oh, that... AUUUUUWWWWWW!!! McQueen: Turn right to go left. Guess what. I tried it. You know what? This crazy thing happened... I went right! Lizzie: You keep talkin' to yourself, people'll think you crazy. McQueen: Thanks for the tip. Lizzie: What? I wasn't talkin' to you. Sally: Oh, Guido, e bellissimo! Guido: Che cosa? Sally: It looks great! This is great! Guido: Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo. Mater: Ummmph. Oh, lord. Hehehe. Sheriff: Mater! I need you to watch the prisoner tonight. Mater: Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute, what if he tries to run again? Sheriff: Just let him run outta gas and tow him on back. But keep an eye on him. Mater: Yes, sir! McQueen: While I'm stuck here paving this stinkin' road, Chick's in California schmoozing Dinoco. My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who's touching me? Luigi: You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix. You make a such a nice new road. You come to my shop. Luigi take a good care of you. Eventhough you not a Ferrari. You buy four tires, I give you a full size spare absolutely free! McQueen: Look, I get all my tires for free. Luigi: Hohoho.. I like your style, eh? You drive the hard bargain. OK. Luigi make you a new deal. You buy one tire, I give you three for free! Flo: Aaa... Would you look at that? Ramone, Ramone! Ramone: Hm,hm,hm. Luigi: Then Luigi make you a new deal McQueen: No,no,no,no. Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you. Luigi: No,no,no,no,no. This is it. My last offer. You buy one tire, I give you seven-a snow tire for all free! Done. You interested, you call me. You know where I am. McQueen: Fuuuhhh. Ahhhh. Stop! Let me...Tuhh, puahh!! sally: Oh, Red, you missed a spot. See it right there? On the hood right there. McQueen: No, no! Noooo!! Stop, stop! That cold!! Help! Please! Stop! Sally: Thanks, Red. McQueen: What was that for? Sally: Do you want to stay at the Cozy Cone or what? McQueen: Huh? Sally: And if you do, you gotta be clean. 'Cause even here in hillibilly hell we have standards. McQueen: What,I...? I don't get it. Sally: Nothing I just thought I'd say thank you for doin' a great job. So I thought I'd let you stay with me. I mean, not with me! But there. Not with me there, but there in your own Cozy Cone. And I'd be in my cone, and it's... McQueen: Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me. Sally: I mean if you want to stay at the dirty impound, thats, thats fine. You know, I understand you criminal types. McQueen: No,no,no,no. That's OK. Yeah, the Cozy Cone. Sally: Ehhh. It's newly refurbished McQueen: Haha. Yeah, it's like a clever little twist the motel's made out of caution cones, which, of course, cars usually try to avoid, now we're gonna stay in them. Haha. That's funny. Sally: Figure that all out on your own, did you? Cone number one, if you want. McQueen: Auuhhh. McQueen: Hey, do I spy a little pinstriping tattoo back there? Sally: Auuww. Haha. That's just a... Ahhahaha. Auuww. You saw that? Yeah! Just gonna be going. Gonna...Yeah. Mater: You know, I once knew this girl Doreen. Good-lookin' girl. Looked just like a Jaguar, only she was a truck! You know, I used to crash into her, just so I could spoke to her. McQueen: What are you talking about? Mater: I don't know. Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight, 'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you! McQueen: No, Mater, I gotta finish this road, and I have to get out of here. Mater: Well, that's all right, Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt. You probably couldn't handle it anyway. McQueen: Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater. You know who you're talkin' to? This is Lightning McQueen. I can handle anything. McQueen: Mater, I'm not doin' this. Mater: Oh, come on, you'll love it. Hehehe. Tractor-tippin's fun. McQueen: This is ridiculous. Mater: All right, listen. When I say go, we go. But don't let Frank catch ya. Go! McQueen: Whoa! Wait! Who, who's Frank? Mater. Wait, Mater! Mater: OK, here's what you do. You just sneak up in front of 'em, and then honk. And they do the rest. Watch this. Mater: Hahahaha. I swear, tractors is so dumb! I tell you what, buddy, you don't get much better than this. McQueen: Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy. Mater: I don't care who you are, that's funny right there. Oh, you turn, bud. McQueen: Mater, I can't. I don't even have a horn. Mater: Baby. McQueen: I'm not a baby. Mater: Puuuck, puck, puck. McQueen: Fine. Stop! stop, OK? All right. I'll do something. Mater & McQueen: Hahahahaha!!! Mater: That's Frank. McQueen: Ahhhh!! Mater: Run, hahaha , run!!! Mater: Run! He's gonna get ya! Hahaha!! Sally: Customers! Mater: Tomorrow night we can go look for the ghostlight! McQueen: I can't wait, Mater. Mater: Oh, yeah, I'm tellin' ya! Oh, boy, you gotta admit that was funnn unn! McQueen: Oh, yeah...yeah. Mater: Well, we better get you back to the impound lot. McQueen: You know, actually, Sally's gonna let me stay at the motel. Mater: Aaaa... Gettin' cozy at the Cone, is we? McQueen: Oh, come...No. No, are you kidding? Besides, she can't stand me. And I don't like her, to be honest. Mater: Yeah, you probably right. Hey, look, there's Miss Sally! McQueen: Where, where? Mater: Hahaha. You're in love with Miss Sally. McQueen: No, I'm not. Mater: Yes, you do. McQueen: No way. Mater: Way. McQueen: Come on, look Mater: You're in love with Miss Sally(2X) McQueen: OK, that's real mature Mater, real grown up. Mater: You love her (7X) McQueen: Wait...All right. OK. Mater, Mater, Mater, no. Will you stop that? Mater: Stop what? McQueen: That's driving backwards stuff. It's creeping me out. You're gonna wreck on somethin'. Mater: Wreck? Shoot! I'm the world's best backwards driver! You just watch this right here, lover boy. McQueen: What are you doing? Watch out! Look out! Mater? Mater! Mater! McQueen: Hey take it easy, Mater! Mater: Waaaaaaa! Ha,ha,ha! Hee,hee. McQueen: Hahaha. He's nuts. Mater: No need to watch where I'm goin'. Just need to know where I've been. McQueen: Whoa, that was incredible! How'd you do that? Mater: Rearview mirrors. We'll get you some, and I'll teach you if you want. McQueen: Yeah, maybe I'll use it in my big race. Mater: What's so important about this race of yours, anyway? McQueen: It's not just a race. We're talking about the Piston Cup! I've been dreaming about it my whole life! I'll be the first rookie in history ever to win it. And when I do, we're talkin' big new sponsor, with private helicopters. No more medicated bumper ointment. No more rusty old cars. Mater: What's wrong with rusty old cars? McQueen: Well, I don't mean you, Mater. I mean other old cars. You know? Not like you. I like you. Mater: Nahhh, it's OK, buddy. Hey, you think maybe one day I can get a ride in one of them helicopters? I mean, I've always wanted to ride in one of them fancy helicopters. McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Mater: You mean it? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Anything you say. Mater: I knew it. I knowed I made a good choice! McQueen: In what? Mater: My best friend. Mater: See you tomorrow, buddy! McQueen and Sally parked beneath a tree, K-I-S somethin'-somethin'-somethin'-t!! McQueen: Hahaha! Whoa, whoa. Haha. McQueen: Number one. Number one...Ahhh...Number one! McQueen: Ahh, this is nice. Sally: Hey, Stickers. McQueen & Sally: Huh!! Sally: I'm sorry. McQueen: Wohho!! You scared me. You gotta be careful. Sally: I scared myself scaring you scaring me. McQueen: I mean, I wasn't like "scared" scared. Sally: No, of course not. Not. McQueen: I was more... Sally: Just I overheard you talkin' to Mater. McQueen: When? Just, just now? What, what did, what did you hear? Sally: Oh, just something about a helicopter ride. McQueen: Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got a kick out of that, didn't he? Sally: Did you mean it? McQueen: What? Sally: That you'll get him a ride. McQueen: Oh, who knows? I mean first things first. I gotta get outta here and make the race. Sally: Ah, hah. You know...Mater trusts you. McQueen: Yeah, OK. Sally: Did you mean that? McQueen: What? Sally: Was it just a "Yeah, OK", or "Yeah...OK" or"Yea-yeah, OK" McQueen: Look, I'm exhausted. It's kinda been a long day. Sally: Yeah, OK. G'night. McQueen: Oh ah. Hey, thank you. Sally: What did you just say? McQueen: You know, thanks for lettin' me stay here. It's nice to be out of the impund, and this is... It's great. Newly refurbished, right? Sally: Yeah. McQueen: Good night. Sally: Good night. Sally: Huhh. Sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. It's Hendrix! McQueen: Ahh...huh...please...huh... Dreaming Song McQueen: No!! Frank: Uarghhh!! McQueen: Noooo!!! I gotta get outta here! McQueen: Hey, have you seen the Sheriff? Oh! Oh, my gosh. Oh! Doc: Hey, what are you doin'? Sheriff: Get a good peak, city boy? McQueen: I,a..a..I just need my daily gas ration from the Sheriff. Doc: Wait for him at Flo's. Now get outta here. McQueen: I've been trying to get outta here for three days! Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the show! McQueen: Whoaho, Doc. Time to clean out the garage, buddy, come on. McQueen: What? He has a Piston Cup? McQueen: Oh, my gosh. Three Piston Cup? Doc: Sign says stay out. McQueen: You, you have three Piston Cups. How could you have... Doc: I knew you couldn't drive. I didn't know you couldn't read. McQueen: You're the Hudson Hornet! Doc: Wait over at Flo's, like I told ya! McQueen: Of course. I can't belive I didn't see it before. You're The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! You still to hold the record for most wins in single season. Oh, we gotta talk. You gotta show me your tricks. Please. Doc: I already tried that. McQueen: And you won the championship three times! Look at those trophies! Doc: You look. All I see is a bunch of empty cups. Filmore: You know, some automotive yoga could really lower your RPM's, man. Sarge: Oh, take a car wash, hippie. Flo: Yeah, look at my husband, y'all. Hooo...That's your color! Ramone: Yellow, baby. Hahaha. Flo: Mmm! You smokin' hot! Sheriff: There he is! McQueen: Oh, my gosh! Did you know Doc is a famous racecar? Folks: Hahahaha! Sheriff: Doc? Our Doc? Sarge: Not Doc Hudson. McQueen: No,no,no,no, it's true! He's a real racing legend. He's The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! Flo: Fabulous? I never seen Doc drive more than 20 miles an hour. I mean, have you ever seen him race? McQueen: No, but I wish I could have of. They say he was amazing! He wins three Piston Cups. Mater: Phooah!! He did what in his cup? Sheriff: I think the heat's startin' to get to the boy! Lizzie: Well, I'll say! Look how red he is! Ramone: Yeah, I think he needs a new coat of poly, man. Mater: Are you sick, buddy? Sheriff: You are lookin' a little peaked. Ramone: Yeah, he needs a new coat of poly for sure! Sheriff: Hey, hey! What are you doin'? Sally: It's OK, Sheriff. You can trust me, right? Sheriff: I trust you, all right. It's him I'm worried about. Sally: Mmm... I trust him. Come on, let's take a drive. McQueen: A drive? Sally: Yeah, a drive. Don't you big city racecars ever just take a drive? McQueen: Ahhh...No. No, we don't. Sally: Hey, Stickers! Do you comin' or what? Flo: Ahmm. And you thought he was gonna run. Ramone: Hey, can you believe it, man? He actually thought Doc was a famous racecar! Hahaha... That's so too much!! McQueen: OK, you got me out here. Where are we goin'? Sally: I don't know. McQueen: Whoa! Yes. Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Whoa! Hahaha. Uahh!! Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Thahhh! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! McQueen: Hahaha! Thuhhh!!Thuhh!! McQueen: Wow! What is this place? Sally: Wheel Well. Used to be the most popular stop on the mother road. McQueen: This place? Sally: Yeah, imagine...Oh, imagine what it must have been like to stay here. McQueen: You know, I don't get you. How does a Porsche wind up in a place like this? Sally: Well, it's really pretty simple. I was...an attorney in LA livin' life in the fast lane, and. McQueen: Oh, you were, were you? Were you rich? Sally: What? McQueen: Just...clues to the puzzle. Sally: Yeah, OK. Well, that was my life. And you know what? It never felt...happy. McQueen: Yeah. I mean...really? Sally: Yeah. So I left California. Just drove and drove and finally broke down right here. Doc fixed me up, Flo took me in. Well, they all did. And I never left. McQueen: Yeah. You know, I understand. You need a little R & R. Recharge and old batteries. But you know, after a while, why didn't you go back? Sally: I fell in love. McQueen: Ohh. Sally: Yep. McQueen: Corvette? Sally: No. Sally: I fell in love with this. McQueen: Whoa. Look at that. Look, they're drivin' right by. They don't even know what they're missing! Sally: Well, it didn't used to be that way. McQueen: Oh, yeah? Sally: Yeah. Forty years ago, that Interstate down there didn't exist. McQueen: Really? sally: Yeah. Back then, cars came across the country a whole different way. McQueen: How do you mean? Sally: Well, the road didn't cut through land like that Interstate. It moved with the land, you know? It rose, it fell, it curved. Folk: Mornin'! Folk: Nice day, huh? Sally: Cars didn't drive on it to make a great time. They drove on it to have a great time. Song McQueen: Well, what happened? Sally: The town got bypassed just to save ten minutes of driving. Song McQueen: How great would it have been to see this place in its heyday! Sally: Ohh...I can't tell you how many times I've dreamed of that. But one of these days, we'll find a way to get it back on the map. McQueen: Yeah. Hey, listen, thanks for the drive. I had a great time. It's kinda nice to slow down every once in a while. Sally: You're welcome. Mater: Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you, we was out smashin' mailboxes, OK? McQueen: Wha... What? Ramone: Oh, man, the paint's still wet! Luigi: No,no,no,no! Get out of the store! Hey! Don't eat the radial! Here, take-a the snow tires. Sheriff: Mater! Mater: I wasn't tractor-tippin'! Sheriff: Then where did all these gol-durn tractors come from? Mater: Whoa, boy! Whoa! McQueen: Hahaha. Hey! Hey guys. There's one goin' this way. I got it. McQueen: Come here, little tractor, come here. Yeah, that's a good tractor. No,no,no,no, come here. What are you doing? You're not supposed to go wandering off all...alone. McQueen: What are you doin' with those old racin' tires? Doc: Huuhhh. McQueen: Come on, Doc, drive. Doc: Ahhhh. Yeah. McQueen: Wow! You're amazing! What are you doin'? Doc, wait! Mater: Giddup right in there! Come on, Rusty. Weee...heyy! McQueen: Doc, hold it! Seriously, your driving's incredible! Doc: Wonderful. Now, go away. McQueen: Hey, I mean it. You've still got it! Doc: I'm askin' you to leave. McQueen: Come on. I'm a racecar, you're... a much older racecar, but under the hood you and I are the same. Doc: We are not the same! Understand? Now, get out. McQueen: How could a car like you quit at the top of your game? Doc: You think I quit? McQueen: Right. Your big wreck in '54. Doc: They quit on me. When I finally got put together, I went back expecting a big welcome. You know what they said? "You're history". Moved right on to the next rookie standing in line. There was a lot left in me. I never got chance to show 'em. I keep that, to remind me never to go back. I just never expected that that world would...would find me here. McQueen: Hey, look, Doc, I'm not them. Doc: Oh, yeah? McQueen: No, I'm not. Doc: When is the last time you cared about something except yourself, hot rod? You name me one time. And I will take it all back. Ahhuh? I didn't think so. These are good folk around here, who care about one another. I don't want 'em depending on someone they can't count on. McQueen: Oh, like you? You've been here how long and your friends don't even know who you are? Who's caring about only himself? Doc: Just finish that road and get outta here! sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. Mater: He's done. He must've finished it while we was all sleepin'. Doc: Good riddance. Flo: He's gone? Sarge: Well, we wouldn't want him to miss that race of his. Sheriff: Hisk...hisk. Ramone: Oh, dude, are you crying? Sheriff: No! I'm happy! I don't have to watch him every second of the day anymore! I'm glad he's gone! Red: Hahaha. McQueen: What's wrong with Red? Mater: Oh, he's just sad 'cause you left town, and went to your big race to win the Piston Cup that you've always dreamed about your whole life and get that big ol' sponsor and that fancy helicopter you was talkin' about. Mater: Huuhh! Wait a minute! Folks: Hahaha. Mater: I knowed you wouldn't leave without saying goodbye. McQueen: Hahaha. Sheriff: What are you doin' here, son? You're gonna miss your race. Don't worry. I'll give you a police escort, and we'll make up the time. McQueen: Thank you, Sheriff. But you know I can't go just yet. Sheriff: Well, why not? McQueen: I'm not sure these tires...can get me all the way to California. Yeah, does anybody know what time Luigi's opens? Luigi: Ah..haha! I can't-a believe it! Luigi: Four new tires! Grazien, Mr. Lightning. Grazien! Flo: Would you look at that! Luigi: Our first real customers in years! I am filled with tears of ecstacy, for this is the most glorious day of my life! McQueen: All right, Luigi, give me the best set of blackwalls you've got. Luigi: No,no,no,no! You don't-a know what you want. Luigi know what you want. Blackwall tires. They blend into the pavement. But-a this...white-wall tires! They say, "Look at me! Here I am! Love me." McQueen: All right, you're the expert. Luigi: Eh, hehehee! McQueen: Oh, and don't forget the spare. Luigi: Perfetto. Guido! Guido: Peet stop! Song Luigi: Hahaha! What did Luigi tell you, aey? McQueen: Wow, you were right. Better than a Ferrari, huh? Luigi: Aaa, No. McQueen: Wow! This organic fuel is great! Why haven't I heard about it before? Filmore: It's a conspiracy, man! The oil companies got a grip on the government! They're feedin' us a bunch of lies, man. McQueen: OK, I'll take a case. Ramone: Ahh.. Yeah. Ka-chow. Mater: Here she comes! McQueen: Places, everybody. Hurry! Act natural. Folks: Hi, Sally. Sally: All right, what's goin' on? Mater: Ladies and gentlecars, please welcome the neeewww Lightning McQueen! McQueen: What do you think? Radiator Springs looks pretty good on me. Sally: I'll say. Rrr. Ka-chow. You're gonna fit right in in California. Oh my goodness. It looks like you've helped everybody in town. McQueen: Yeah, everybody except one. Hey, is it getting dark out? Lizzie: What? What'd he say? McQueen: Let me say that again. Is it getting dark out? Lizzie: Now, what was I supposed to do after that? Song Sally: They fixed their neon. Flo: Low and slow? Ramone: Oh, yeah, baby! McQueen: Just like in its heyday, right? Sally: It's even better than I pictured it. Thank you. McQueen: Shall we cruise? Lizzie: Oh, thank you, dear. I'd love to! McQueen: No,no,no. Sally: Lizzie! Lizzie: I remember when Stanley first asked me to take a drive with him. Mater: Hey, Miss sally. May I have this cruise? Sally: Of course, Mater. Sheriff: A,a,ah! Lizzie: ...and again and I said, "No," and he asked me again, and I said, "No." But, oh, he was a persistent little burger for a two-cylinder. Finally I said, "All right, one little drive." Mater: Hahaha. McQueen: Hey! Sally: Thanks, Mater. Mater: Good evenin', you two. Lizzie: Oh, Stanley, I wish you could see this. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Oh, I don't know, Flo. I haven't had a chance to find out. But I am going to find out. Hello. Flo: Not that. That. Sally: Huh. Customers? Flo: Customers, everybody! And a lot of 'em! You know what to do. Just like we rehearsed. Mater: It's the ghostlight! Helicopter: We have found McQueen. We have found McQueen! Cameramen: McQueen, over here! McQueen: Aaa, wait, excuse me. Cameramen: Is it true you've been in rehab? Cameramen: Did you have a nervous breakdown, McQueen. McQueen: I'm sorry, what? Cameramen: McQueen's wearing whitewalls! Cameramen: Are the tires you wearing are turning balding? Sally: Stickers, McQueen! Cameramen: Was Lightning McQueen your prisoner? Mater: Shoot, no! We're best buds! I ain't braggin' or nothin', but I was in charge of huntin' him down if he tried to escape. McQueen: Sally, Sally! Kori: McQueen! Will you still race for the Piston Cup? Sally: Stickers? McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Come on, give us some bolt! Mack: You're here! Thank the manufacturer! You're alive! McQueen: Mack? Mack: You're here! I can't belive it! Oh, hoho. You are a sight for some headlights! I'm so sorry I lost you, boss. I'll make it up to you! McQueen: Mack, I, I can't belive you're here. Harv: Is that the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is that Harv? Mack: Yeah. He's in the back. Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! Mack: Get back, you oil-thirsty parasites! Cameramen: Hey, where's the old McQueen? Mack: Actually, this is my good side here. Cameramen: Show us the bolt! McQueen: Harv! Harv! Cameramen: Give us the bolt! McQueen: Harv? Cameramen: Come on! Harv: Kid, I'm over here! McQueen: How you doin', buddy? Harv: My star client disappears off the face of the earth! How do you think I'm doing? McQueen: Harv, I can explain. Harv: I'm doing great! You're everywhere, baby! Radio, TV, the papers! You can't buy this kind of publicity! What do you need me for? That's just a figure of speech, by the way. You signed a contract. Where are you? I can't even find you on my GPS. McQueen: I'm in this little town called Radiator Springs. You know Route 66? It's still here! Harv: Yeah, that's great, kid. Playtime is over, pal. While the world's been trying to find you, Dinoco has had no one to woo. Who are they gonna woo? McQueen: Chick! Harv: Bingo. In fact, check out what's on the plasma right now. Cameramen: Show us the thunder! Chick: You want thunder? You want thunder? Ka-chicka, ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! McQueen: Hey, that's my bit! Harv: You've gotta get to Cali, pronto! Just get out of Radiation Stinks now, or Dinoco is history, you hear me? McQueen: Just give me a second here, Harv. Harv: No,no,no, wait. Where are goin'. Get in the trailer, baby. Kid! You want, you want a bigger trailer? McQueen: Sally, I...I want you to... Look, I wish...Ahhhh. Sally: Thank you. Thanks for everything. McQueen: Ah. Haha. It just a road. Sally: No. It was much more than that. Mack: Hey, kid! We gotta go. Harv's goin' crazy! He's gonna have me fired if I don't get you in the truck right now! McQueen: Mack, just... hold it for... Sally: You should go. McQueen: I know, but... Sally: Good luck in California. I hope you find what you're looking for. Cameramen: McQueen, come on! McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! The bolt! Hey, Lightning, show us the bolt! Cameramen: Where's the old McQueen? Harv: Come on, get in the trailer. That's it. That's right kid, let's go! You're a big shining star. You're a superstar. You don't belong there, anyway. McQueen: Whoa... Wait...Whoa,whoa,wait,wait! Cameramen: Hey, guys! McQueen's leavin' in the truck! Kori: Hey, are you Doc Hudson? Doc: Yeah. Kori: Thanks for the call. Sally: You called them? Doc: It's best for everyone, Sally. Sally: Best for everyone, or best for you? Mater: I didn't get to say goodbye to him. Bob: Hello, race fans, and welcome to what has become, quite simply, the biggest event in the history of racing. A three way battle for the Piston Cup! Darrell: There's a crowd of nearly 200,000 cars here at the Los Angeles International Speedway. Tickets to this race are hotter than a black leather seat on a hot summer day! Bob: The King, Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in a 200 laps, winner-takes-all, tiebreaker race. Darrell: You know I got a lotta miles on me, but let me tell you somethin' buddy. I never thought I'd see anything like this. Wow! Man. This is exciting! Bob: In fact, the country has almost shut down, to watch what many experts are calling "the race of the century." Junior: Hey, King! Good luck in your last race. You've sure been an inspiration to me. The King: Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it. Dear: Hey, be careful out there, OK? The King: Yeah, mam. Mia: He's hot. Chick: Wanna know the forecast? I'll give you the forecast. A 100 percent chance of thunder! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Security: Hey, you! No admittance without a garage pass. Fred: Oh, it's OK. Lightning McQueen knows me! Andretti: Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day for a race, isn't it? Security: Absolutely, Mr. Andretti. Andretti: And good morning to you, Fred. Fred: Mario Andretti he knows my name! You gotta let me in now! Security: Sorry, pal. McQueen: OK, here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. Victory, one winner, two losers. Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed... Mack: Hey, Lightnin'! You ready? McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm...I'm ready. McQueen: Mack, thanks for being my pit crew today. Mack: Nahh. Don't worry about it, kid. It's the least I could do. After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name. McQueen: It is? Mack: Nahh, not really. Small aeroplane: A. O. TV Crew: Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16. Bob: And there he is, Lightning McQueen! Missing all week, and then he turns up in the middle of nowhere! In a little town called Radiator Springs. Darrell: Wearin' whitewall tires, of all things. Chick: Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Hahaha. Hey, where you been? I've been kinda lonely. Nobody to hang out with. I mean, except the Dinoco folks. Ohhh and the twins. Of course. You know the twins the one that used to be your fans, but now they're my fans. Anyway, listen to what the twins think... McQueen: Ahh. Shoot! Fans: Boogity, boogity, boogity, boys! Let's go racin'! Dear: Come on, you can do it! Tex: Come on kid, make us proud, boy! Bob: Fifty laps down, and The King is still holding a slim lead. Darrell: Hey, McQueen's got a run on him! He's lookin' to the inside! Ohh! Chick slammed the door on him! Bob: Chick's not making it easy on him today. Darrell: Oh, man, he lost so much momentum, and now he's gonna have to chase him back down! Bob: Ohhh, McQueen spins out in the infield! Chick: Hahaha! Just me and the old man, fellas. McQueen just doesn't have it today. Mack: Hey, kid, are you all right? McQueen: I don't know, Mack. I..I... I don't think I... Doc: I didn't come all this way to see you quit. McQueen: Doc? Guys: Yey.. Hahaha. McQueen: Guys, you're here! I can't believe this! Doc: I knew you needed a crew chief, but I didn't know it was this bad. McQueen: I thought you said you'd never come back. Doc: Well, I really didn't have a choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye. Mater: Goodbye!! Okay, I'm good. McQueen: Hahaha! Doc: All right, if you can drive as good as you fix a road, then you can win this race with you eyes shut. Now, get back out there! Hot snot, we are back in business! Guido! Luigi! You're goin' up against professional pit crews boys, you're gonna have to be fast. Luigi: They will not know what bit them! Doc: Kid, you can beat these guys. Find a groove that works for you and get that lap back. Chick's Crew: Is that? Chick's Crew: Oh, wow. That's him! TV Crew: Is that...? That's the Hudson Hornet! Bob, Darrell! The Hudson Hornet's back! Bob: Darrell, it appears McQueen has got himself a pit crew. And look who he has for a crew chief! Fans: Wow... Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet! Biggest fan: Whoa!! Fans: Well, dip me in axle grease and call me Slick! It surely is. Biggest fan: Hahahahaha! Bob: Wow, this is history in the making. Nobody has seen the racing legend in over 50 years! Lizzie: Hey, Doc! Come look at the fellow on the radio. He looks just like you. Bob: McQueen passes them on the inside! Darrell: But he's still nearly a lap fail. Bob: Can he catch up to them with only 60 laps to go? Doc: You're goin' great, kid. Just keep your head on. Guido: Vai! Vai! Vai,vai! Chick's crew: Hey, shrimpie, where did McQueen find you, huh? Those round things are called tires, and they go under the car! All Chick's Crew: Hahahahaha!!! Guido: Con chi credi di parlare? Ma, con chi stai parlando? Luigi: No! No, no! You'll have your chance. You will have your chance. Chick: Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh? Well, what do you think of this? Yeah, that's it kid. Whats?? Mater: Whoa! Git-R-done! Hahaha! I taught him that. Ka-chow! Chick Crew: Auuww! Bob: What a move by McQueen! He's caught up to the leaders. Darrell: Oh, yeah. This is what it's all about. A three-way battle for the lead, with ten to go. Tex: Hahaha! Look at that boy go out there! Chick: No, you don't. McQueen: Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat! Doc: Can you get back to the pits? McQueen: Yeah, yeah. I think so. Doc: Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in. Don't tear yourself up, kid. Mack: We gotta get him back out there fast or we're gonna be a lap down, and we'll never win this race! Doc: Guido! It's time. Chick Crew: Hey, tiny, you gonna clean his windshield? Hahaha! Darrell: I don't believe it! Bob: That was the fastest pit stop I've ever seen! Darrell: It was a great stop, but he's still gotta beat that pace car out! Bob: It's gonna be close. Mater: Yeah!! Biggest Fan: Yeah, baby!! Fans: Yeah... Hahaha! Darrell: Yeah!! He's back in the race! Guido: Peet stop. Luigi: Guido, you did it! Mater: Way to go, Guido! Ramone: Yeah!! Bob: This is it. We're heading into the final lap and McQueen is right behind the leaders. What a comeback! Darrell: A hundred and ninety-nine laps, and, baby, it all comes down to this! Doc: This is it, kiddo. You've got four turns left. One at a time. Drive it in deep and hope it sticks. Go! Chick: We'll see about that! Bob: McQueen's going inside! Bob: Chick and The King are loose! Darrell: I think McQueen is out of the race! Darrell: McQueen saved it! Bob: He's back on the track! Doc: Float like a Cadillac... McQueen: Sting like a Beemer! Biggest Fan: Ka-chow, ka-chow, ka-chow! Fans: Wooowww! Folks: Yeeehaaaa! Hahaha. Darrell: Lightning McQueen is gonna win the Piston Cup! Sally: Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers! Chick: I am not comin' in behind you again, old man. Dear: Oh, no! Chick: Yeah... Woooww! I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah! Flo: What's he up to, Doc? The King: What are you doin', kid? McQueen: I think The King should finish his last race. The King: You just gave up the Piston Cup, you know that? McQueen: Ahhh. This grumpy old racecar I know once told me somethin'. It's just an empty cup. Bob: Darrell, is pushing on the last lap legal? Darrell: Hey, man. He's not really pushin' him. He's just givin' him a little bump draft. Chick: Whoaa.. Hohooo!! Hey. What? What's goin' on? Fan: That's what I call racin' right there. Tex: Hahaha! Luigi: Bravo il mio amico! Mater: Way to go, buddy! Filmore: There's a lotta love out there, you know, man? Sarge: Don't embarrass me, Filmore. Lizzie: That's my hot rod. Chick: Come on, baby, bring it out! Bring out the Piston Cup! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Yeah! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! Hey, how come I'm the only one celebrating is me, huh? Where are the girls? Bring on the confetti! Auuww! Auuww! Easy with the confetti. What's goin' on? Come on, snap some pictures. I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco! Ka-chicka! Say it with me. Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Cameramen: Booo! Mia & Tia: Booo! Chick: What's wrong with everybody? Where's the happiness? Hey! This is the start of the Chick era! Dear: Thanks, Lightnin'. McQueen: You're welcome. Fan: Way to go, King! Fan: You're still the car! Biggest Fan: You're The King! Yeah! Rust-eze Folks: Yeah! Hahahaha! Mack: Wahh! Hoo! Rust-eze Car: You make us proud, kid! Mack: Congrats on the loss, me bucko! Doc: You got a lotta of stuff, kid. McQueen: Thanks, Doc. Tex: Hey, Lightnin'. How 'bout comin' over here and talk to me a minute? Son, that was some real racin' out there. How'd you like to become the new face of Dinoco? McQueen: But I didn't win. Tex: Lightnin', there's a whole lot more to racin' than just winnin'. Rust-eze Van: He was so rusty, when he drove down the street. Hahaha. Buzzards used to circle the car! Folks: Hahahaha. McQueen: Thank, you, Mr. Tex, but...but these Rust-eze guys over there gave me my big break. I'm gonna stick with them. Tex: Well, I sure can respect that. Still, you know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just let me know. McQueen: I sure appreciate that. Thank you. Actually, there is one thing. Mater: Whoah! Hoo! Aaaa! Hey look at me! I'm flyin', by golly! Whoahh! Hoo! I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park! Luigi: I think it's about-a time we redecorate. Michael Schumacker: Chow! Hi, Lightning McQueen told me this was the best place in the world to get tires. How 'bout setting me and my friends up with three or four sets each? Luigi: Huh. Guido! There is a real Michael Schumacker Ferrari in my store. A real Ferrari! Punch me, Guido. Punch me in the face. This is the most glorious day of my life. Michael Schumacker: Wow. Spero che il tuo amico si riprenda. Mi dicono che siete fantastici. Sally: Uh..huh!. Hahaha. Just passin' through? McQueen: Actually, I thought I'd stop and stay awhile. I hear this place is back on the map. Sally: It is? McQueen: Yeah, there's some rumor floating around that some hotshot Piston Cup racecar is setting up his big racing headquarters here. Sally: Really? Well, there goes the town. McQueen: You know, I really missed you, Sally. Sally: Well, I create feelings in others they themselves don't understand and, blah, blah, blah, blah. McQueen: Hahaha. Mater: McQueen and Sally parked beneath the tree, K-i-s-s...i-n-t! McQueen: Great timing, Mater! Mater: Hep-non, hip-hep, hi-li-lilly! Weeeee!! McQueen: He's my best friend. What're you gonna do? Sally: So, Stickers, last one to Flo's buys? McQueen: I don't know. Why don't we just take a drive? Sally: Mmm. Nahh. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Mater: Yeeeehoooo!!!!! Song
the entire script of cars (2006)
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