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catb-fics · 4 years

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Falling For Your Best Friend (Van McCann) Part 3

Warnings: none (super fluffy!) / Word Count 3.9k

Read Part 1 here Read Part 2 here

You struggle to fall asleep that night and when you do you find you wake up early, replaying what happened with Van over and over in your head. You had expected him to text you when you'd rushed off from his house that night but he didn't, and you find you're checking your phone all the next day. Still nothing. Maybe you should text him? You quickly dismiss the idea, realising that you have no idea what to say to him.

Five days later and you've still heard nothing. You think something is seriously wrong now. You can't remember a time when you've gone for more than two days without hearing from Van, even when he's miles away in another country you make the time to check in with each other. Eventually you can't take it any more and call Larry, hoping you can surreptitiously find out how Van's doing without having to contact him directly.

"Alright Y/N, how ya doing?" He answers the phone brightly.

"Hiya, I'm ok thanks. Just thought I'd say hi..."

"You're after something, I can tell!" Larry says straight away. "Come on what you after?"

"I'm not, I'm just saying hello, that's all! What you up to?"

He sighs deeply so you can hear it. "You wanna know how Van is don’t you?"

"No!" You say hurriedly. Are you that transparent? Eventually you cave in when Larry doesn't speak straight away. "Well... is he okay?"

"Well if you must know, he's been acting like a right mardy bugger since last weekend. He's not been himself at all. First he said he had writers’ block which I knew was bullshit ‘cause he never struggles to write. Then he said he was staying out the way as he was working on a new song. I don’t know what’s going on with him. Did something happen with you pair last weekend?"

"No... no... of course not!" You blurt out, feeling heat rising in your cheeks and you're just glad Larry can't see you as you can't seem to hide anything from him when you're face to face.

Larry starts telling you a story about a night out he had with Johnny but you're not really listening. You can't get Van out of your mind. This is ridiculous. You can't let years of friendship slip away over a stupid moment that probably didn't even mean anything to Van. He's probably feeling awkward after you completely over-reacted. You form a plan in your mind, and when you have the opportunity you slip it into your conversation.

"Well, if Van's being grumpy we should all have a night out. What do you say? Go on, it'd be a laugh. Bet the lads would be well up for it!"

Within ten minutes you've brightened up considerably, and Larry's promised to make the arrangements.

* * * * *

Saturday night sees you slipping into your favourite little dress. You curl your long brown hair into soft waves and spend ages getting your make up just right. You wouldn't normally make such an effort for a night out with the lads down the local pub, and you know you'll have to endure some teasing from them, but you want to look good. Van's still not been in touch with you and your uneasiness has grown to such a level that your nerves are jangling in your gut as you push open the door of the pub.

"Here she is!" Johnny announces as he spots you from across the crowded room. "You scrub up alright! Who you tryin' to impress, eh?"

Larry joins in, with a wink. "Yeah, who's the lucky fella?"

You smile awkwardly, your eyes darting to the only other person at the table. Van. "Alright Y/N?" He says. "On the pull tonight then, are ya?"

You're glad of the dim lighting as you feel the heat rise to your cheeks. "As if I'd find anyone worth pulling in this place!" You say, looking down and fumbling in your handbag for your purse. "I'll get a round in before the others get here. Make it a cheap one! What you all having?"

Johnny informs you that actually it's just the five of you tonight as Benji and Bob can't make it so you start towards the bar.

"I'll give you a hand." Van shoots up out of his chair quickly.

There's a huge crowd around the bar and he finds a spot where the queue's not too big so pushes through. You're standing right behind him when a stocky guy shoves his way past you, pushing you forwards, causing your hand to brush Van’s bum. You mumble an apology and he turns around, grinning.

"Can't you at least wait till we get back to mine before you start touching me up?"

"You wish!" You shoot back at him.

"I know you've not seen me for a week but you could try and control yourself!"

The crowd round the bar's thinned out now so you move to stand alongside Van. "You're such a twat!" You say, trying to distract from the flirty tone he seems to be taking with you. You wonder if he's thinking about the sofa incident too. Probably not. He's probably just teasing like he always has done and you're just reading too much into it. At least he's not acting awkwardly. If anything, you probably are.

You're glad when the bartender puts the first pint down on the bar, and immediately grab it and take a huge swallow. As you place your glass down you glance at Van and catch him looking you up and down. "You do... errr... look nice tonight actually."

You mumble a thank you. Van never notices how you look. Well if he does he doesn't really comment on it, unless he's winding you up. You decide to take the plunge and ask what's been on your mind.

"So... what you been up to this week then? Have you been so busy with rockstar shit you forgot to contact me?"

He looks uncomfortable, but only for a second. "It's been mental Y/N. I've been working on a new song, but I’m not sure about it. The pressure's really on now for the new album. Sorry I've not been in touch."

You feel a sense of relief that he's not been hiding away since your almost-kiss. But then you wonder whether that means that it never affected him at all. You wish you could stop overthinking things, it's exhausting.

Van takes a huge slurp from his pint, the froth decorating his top lip like an absurd moustache. You can't help but giggle as he wipes his mouth on the back of his hand and then you spot a drop on his nose.

"You've got it all here!" You point to your own nose, but he's not getting it. "C'mere!" You say drawing closer and wiping it off for him, your eyes meeting and locking for a moment.

"Van! Van McCann!" You hear a high-pitched squeal from behind you, then another voice chimes in. "Fucking hell it is him!"

Van has a kind of deer-in-the-headlights look about him as he looks beyond you. You turn around to see two young girls standing there, excitement and adoration on their faces. One of them just looks stunned, unable to move, but the other pushes past you, literally shunting you to the side as she makes a beeline for him. You right yourself, and then feel awkward as the confident girl flings her arms around Van, gushing on about how amazing he is and how much she loves his voice. Van looks over to you, eyes wide with a kind of 'help me' expression and this amuses you. You offer to take a photo with the shy girl's phone, and she agrees gratefully.

You just feel plain awkward after that. The girls want to know all about the new songs Van’s been writing for the album, and he looks hesitant at first, but after a while he appears relaxed, talking about what he loves with real genuine fans. You should be feeling proud and you are, but it's disquieting how easily his attention has been shifted. You quietly slink away and sit back down with Johnny and Larry, unnoticed by Van.

"Check out the look on his face," Larry says, looking over at Van. "He's fucking lapping it up!"

Johnny shakes his head, laughing. "How come I’m not getting all this attention? Come on ladies, I'm right here!"

"Hey Y/N you might have to share our Van tonight!" Larry nods over to you. "Or you might have to take it in turns. Don't think there's enough of him to go around!"

"It's okay, I actually have taste!" You jibe. "They're welcome to him."

You ignore Larry’s shit-eating grin, not wanting to draw attention to your annoyance, or the fact that if you do the teasing will likely ramp up a notch. You spark up a conversation about the festivals the band are playing that summer, and try to avoid looking over at Van. You gulp your pint, and order a large glass of wine when Johnny offers to go to the bar next.

Van’s admirers leave eventually, but then he's stopped by a young couple who also look excited to meet him. By the time he gets back to your table you've practically sunk your wine and you're feeling lightheaded already.

"Where did you bugger off to when I needed rescuing?" He says accusingly but with a grin.

"Hmm... you looked pretty happy with your little groupies!" You try to joke, but it comes out slightly harsh sounding, earning raised eyebrows from Larry.

"Fuck's sake there's more of 'em!" Johnny points over to a group of lads and girls across the pub who've just clocked Van and are pointing and waving.

This night isn't turning out the way you'd envisaged and you can't keep the disappointment out of your voice as you suggest moving to another pub. You're sure Van will want to stay though.

"It's a bit much, ain't it?" He says, surprising you. "Shall we all just go back to ours?" Larry agrees.

Fifteen minutes later you're all piling into a taxi and you're sat in the front whilst the lads are in the back. You glance around to see Johnny and Larry in a huddle discussing something but Van’s looking out the window, seemingly deep in thought.

You reach Van and Larry’s and pay, despite the lad's protestations, and then get out. Van does too, but then to your surprise he shuts the taxi door and before you can say anything it starts to move away from the kerb, with Johnny and Larry waving from inside.

"Where are they going?"

"Oh Larry says he’s starving so him and Bondy are gonna go for a curry,” Van says. "C'mon, let’s carry on. I got loads of booze left from when you bolted and left me last weekend!"

It's the first time either of you have referred to it, and you wonder if you should say something, maybe make an excuse, but you decide to ignore it, following Van into the house. Your phone bleeps with a text as you follow him through to the living room and you take it out your bag to check it.

Larry: Thought we'd leave you two lovebirds to it. Have fun! 😉

Van goes off to the kitchen to fetch some drinks and you quickly type in a reply.

Go fuck yourself!

"You okay?" Van says as he enters the room, passing you a bottle of lager. "You look a bit pissed off."

"Oh no, it's just Larry being an arsehole," you say holding your phone up.

Van smiles. "Usual behaviour then! He was being weird in the taxi, him and Bondy whispering and giggling like a pair of school kids or summat."

Bastards! You now know that Larry’s orchestrated this which means he's more than likely said something to Johnny. You cringe inwardly when you imagine the roasting you're going to get from the pair of them next time you see them. Johnny’s teasing can be relentless and you know it'll only be a matter of time before Van finds out.

You sip your beer, sitting down on the sofa, and Van sits down beside you, but at an angle so his body's turned towards you. "Actually, I'm kinda glad it's just us two..."

Your heart almost stops at Van's words. "Oh yeah?"

He gets up and crosses to the far side of the room, and you're glad of the temporary relief of having him move away. You can feel your heart beat starting to throb in your chest and you feel a warmth flooding you, nervous as to why he wants you all to himself.

He picks up an acoustic guitar which is propped up against the far wall. "I wanna play you that song I've been working on.”

"Oh... yeah... sure."

Your heart is racing now. You've heard Van sing countless times, from way back when all this was still a pipe dream and he was taking his first tentative steps into song-writing. His voice has always moved you, but recently it's evoked something else in you. The thought of him sitting now, so close, singing just for you makes you feel hugely uncomfortable. But what can you do?

He takes a seat right next to you, again with his body angled so he's facing you, the guitar in his lap whilst he sets about tuning it.

"Don’t know what you’re gonna think of this one. Reckon it’ll definitely be on the new album...” He trails off, flashing you a grin.

He begins to strum, eyes on the strings as he plucks out the notes whilst you sit, trying to compose yourself. When he starts to sing you can feel goosebumps break out over your whole body. He truly has a beautiful voice, it's breathtaking.

At first you’re not even taking in the lyrics, it’s like you’re in some kind of trance, but as his eyes travel upwards and meet your gaze, you start to really listen.

When you wrap me round your fingers baby

And you make me do that shit I never do

And as I pick you up on Sauchiehall Street

I know I want you to myself again

Your memories immediately go to the band’s last UK tour and getting drunk in a bar in Glasgow with Van after a show. But he wouldn’t be singing about you. That’s just impossible...

His eyes are still fixed on you and it’s so intense it's uncomfortable. You can't hold his gaze for long, dropping your eyes to watch his fingers on the strings. Hearing him sing like this is incredible, but you're hoping the song comes to an end soon, sure you're giving something away in your discomfort. It must be obvious surely?

As the last note reverberates around the room he looks at you expectantly. "Ah... you don't like it I can tell!"

"No... no, I love it!" You blurt out.

Van raises his eyebrows disbelievingly. "But you had a funny look on your face the whole way through. Come on, don't lie to me! Your opinion means a lot to me you know!"

You feel awkward, wondering what to say. You can't tell him the real reason why you're acting strange. The fact that when Van's singing and looking into your eyes all you can think about is leaning over and kissing him. But it's more than that. Your heart's yearning for him so much now that you're deadly certain that you're falling in love with him, and the realisation hits you with such force that you feel suffocated all of a sudden.

"What's up with you now?" He looks concerned. "You don't look so good."

You make an excuse about going out for a smoke, and head outside, trying to compose yourself.

To your surprise Van follows you out. You haven't even lit up yet, and you turn to face him, feeling wary when you see the expression on his face. He looks uncomfortable when he starts to speak.

"Y/N we need to talk..."

Fuck! This is it. You can see it in his eyes, the way they dart around before coming back to meet yours. You take a deep breath, decide to play dumb. "What about?"

Van exhales loudly, eyebrows slightly raised as if he's surprised that you haven't a clue. You know you're making this more difficult but you can't help it. You feel terrified of what's coming next. Will he say he just wants to be friends after all? You know he'll be kind and let you down gently, he'd hate to hurt you after all, but somehow the thought of this is even more painful.

"C'mon... sit down with me." He gestures to the sofa and your mind immediately goes to the previous weekend and what happened there.

It's not like you can say no, you have no choice but to deal with it. You sit down, but perch on the edge, looking away from Van, down the dark garden. It's gotten chilly now and you shiver in your little dress.

"You're cold," he states. "C'mere."

He leans forward, slipping an arm over your shoulder. His body feels warm next to yours and you wish you could nuzzle into him but you hold yourself stiffly, pulling away slightly.

Van chuckles, pretends to sniff his armpit. "What's up? Do I stink or something?"

You giggle. "Yeah you do actually!"

But he doesn't, there's just a faint smell of his aftershave and the natural scent of him which you love. You force yourself to try and relax, nestling into his side.

"Y/N, how long have we known each other for?"

You let your mind wander back, picturing your first day at primary school. You were shy back then and didn't make friends easily. You remember a dark haired rat-faced little boy who used to pick on you, you can't remember his name but he was a little shit. You remember Van coming along and kicking him in the shins for pulling your ponytail and making you cry. You smile at the memory.

"You rescued me on my first day at primary school!" You chuckle, not expecting him to remember but he does.

"Yeah, and I got a right bollocking too for that!" He laughs. "See... I've always got your back!"

You're both quiet for a moment, and Van’s the next to speak. "I used to write you little love notes and poems back then."

What?

“No you didn't!"

"I bloody did!" Van cries out, laughing again. "I was just too shy to show you. Reckon it was my first go at song-writing. Wish I still had 'em now. Would've been some class lyrics right there!"

You're unsure how to react, trying to think of some silly comment to relieve the tension that you're feeling, but your mind's gone blank so you just sit there... And what comes next floors you.

"You know, I reckon I've always loved you since then."

Love? Surely he's just talking about the closeness of your friendship, that's all. You sit up slightly and his arm falls from around your shoulder as you turn to face him. You're expecting him to crack a joke with a big cheeky grin on his face but he looks deadly serious.

"What you going on about?" You say quietly.

He looks a little exasperated then. "Fucks sake Y/N! You’re not making this easy for me are ya?"

He springs up on to his feet, pushing his hands through his hair, pacing for a moment. When he sits back down a moment later he grabs hold of both of your hands.

"This isn't going the way I planned at all... I was gonna go and apologise for last week... you know... for kissing you...” He pauses, looking down for a second, then back up. "But I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry one bit. All I wanna do is kiss you again!"

"I... errr... I..." you falter but then fall silent. Your mind is blaring at you to do or say something. Kiss him or tell him how you feel, but you're frozen where you sit.

Van’s brows furrow into a little frown. "Bloody hell, say something then... don't leave me hanging!"

He's pulled his bottom lip between his teeth and he looks nervous. You notice he's drumming the fingers from one hand on his leg, he's anxious, on edge, waiting for you...

"I like you Van.” you say hurriedly, your cheeks flushing with your admission. "Fuck, I really like you. But we've been friends for so long I don't wanna ruin anything."

Van’s shoulders seem to sag a little like he's relieved, but his expression shows frustration. "How we gonna ruin anything? We know each other so well. Yeah we fall out sometimes but we always make up don't we?"

"But... but what happens if we really fall out? Like if I get jealous of you and some girl..."

"Hold on a minute..." Van interrupts. "I don't exactly fuck about do I?"

He looks offended and you feel bad. He's right. He might have plenty of admirers but that's not Van’s style at all.

"I didn't mean anything bad, I'm just... I don't know... scared." You pause, then a thought enters your head. "Anyway, what did you mean? When you said you always... errr... loved me?"

Van rolls his eyes a little and a little smile breaks out on his lips. He laughs to himself and looks down before looking at you, shaking his head. "You didn't know then?"

You feel bewildered by this. It's only really been a matter of months that you've started to see him in a different light. "You're having me on aren't you?"

Van just shakes his head. Your heart's beating so hard now it feels like it could burst free from your rib cage at any moment. It's almost like he can read your mind as he says "Me heart's going fuckin' mental!"

He grins and lifts one of your hands that he's holding and places it against his chest and he's right. He feels warm and you imagine unbuttoning his shirt and touching his bare skin. A warm glow starts to spread through you at the thought.

"So what now then?"

You laugh nervously. "Maybe we should... errr... kiss again..."

"See if there's like fireworks and all that, eh?" He says, still grinning.

"Don't build it up, it might be shit!" You start laughing, but your laughter dies abruptly when you see Van leaning closer. He's not looking into your eyes anymore, his gaze is fixed firmly on your mouth.

You look at his lips. They're full and pink and slightly parted. You lean into him until your foreheads are touching. You stay like that for a moment, suddenly aware of how quiet it is. You swallow deeply and hear Van take a shaky breath.

You feel his hands go around your waist and you drape yours over his shoulders. You close your eyes and tilt your head, moving to press your lips against his. It feels like the whole world's fallen away and there's only the two of you.

The kiss is slow and gentle, your lips moving against each other's softly, it almost feels like your first kiss you're so goddamn nervous. Van’s hands on your waist tighten their grip as the kiss deepens, his tongue tentatively exploring your mouth. The feel of his soft lips on yours, his warm breath, the way your bodies are now flush against each other's, hearts racing. It's everything.

After what seems like an eternity but in reality has probably only been a few minutes you both naturally break away, looking at each other, gauging the other's reaction.

"Well, it definitely wasn't shit!" Van laughs under his breath.

You're aware that you're smiling like a complete idiot but you can't stop. You feel on top of the world.

"Van?"

He looks at you, his beautiful blue eyes scanning your face. "Yeah?" His voice comes out as a whisper.

"I think I love you too."

THE END 💕

#catfish and the bottlemen #van mccann #fanfic #vanfic #van mccann x reader

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