#i would've made this smuttier but writing this much already took me way too long

[yeyinde]

Lev!!! you cannot just post that masterpiece and dip. I cannot breathe. I'm grinning like a fucking baffon in my room and thank god it's sunday or else I sure would've call in sick. I'm not kidding. I have no self control and I would've read this at my workplace and God, I don't want to picture me squirming in my seat with a 60yr old woman sitting 2 feet away.

the way you write, smut or not, you include these tiny little details that people wouldn't notice, not even in real life, not even during that particular moment of ecstacy and somehow make it even more smuttier(?). it's never in and out with a grunt here and growl there with your works. it's a whole fucking experience and I have to have a mini freak out and mentally prepare myself before I read any of your work. your single fic is better than many published books I've read.

God, I would love to sit inside your brain and intercept every single one of your tho(ugh)t processes, analyze why you decided to put one particular word over another and such (also I was picturing Price on all fours until you mentioned that he was on his back. what's your thought process there?).

anyway, I'll rb your fic after I have an another proper meltdown so that I can get access to some coherent thoughts and the ability to string words together.

p.s:(I would very much like to deck that one editor that told me fanfic is not real writing and shove this masterpiece down their throat)

p.p.s: I get anxious when I send ask without anon ( don't know why) but I really wanted to send that pic cause that's what it looked like when you posted it.

p.p.p.s: (this is the last one promise) were you listening to purity ring when you wrote it? why that song? sorry for the long ass ask.

OMGGGGGGG for some reason, this does not show up on tumblr mobile - which is what I primarily use unless I'm posting a fic! So I am so so so sorry it took so long for me to reply!!

And AHHHHHH!! This is too much for me, honestly! You're way too nice about the rampant filth I write!!!! I had so many emotions reading this that I can't even begin to process ANY of them!! THANK YOU!!!

As for some of the questions posed:

With Price, I tried to be as true to his character (or the way I perceive his character) as I could be when I wrote this. I know it's just smut, and pegging smut at that!, but I like realism in whatever I read and since I usually write stuff that I like, I needed to include it. It had to make sense to me. I don't think Price would do this with just anyone, but if he mentioned it - he wants it. He was fairly confident through the whole thing, whereas MC was freaking out. I liked the contrast between their characters.

I don't think he'd be inclined to be on his knees for the first time. It would be something he needs to build up to before he gives up that aspect of himself. This was already quite a heavy experience, and so. It just made sense to me that he'd be on his back, with MC over him so he can watch their expressions, and take in the experience as it flickers over their face.

It's also infinitely more intimate, which is what - in Price's head - was the goal?? Like, it was a hot moment, but it was also fostering more trust, and taking a deeper plunge into their relationship. It delves into this a bit more at the end when MC finally has a moment to step away from "JESUS I AM "BALLS" DEEP INSIDE CAP PRICE RIGHT NOW" and look at things with a wider perspective.

It also gives him a modicum of control as well. Which, I think is the basal aspect of his character.

That's quite wordy for what this fic is, OMG. That's sort of what I volleyed back and forth in my head before writing this one.

And I was listening to Purity Ring!!! I rediscovered them through Letterkenny and this song is quite intense to me. The lyrics are just so PERFECT. All of my fics have connecting songs to them that either set the tone when I was writing or explore a different facet of what I want to convey through the lyrics. Usually, it's just atmosphere, but for Fineshrine - it was both!

Ahh, I get so nervous when stuff gets so wordy!!!!! Sorry for the spiel!

This was such a lovely message, and I am so gutted I only found it now. Thank you so much! It genuinely baffles me when people take an interest in my thoughts behind the smut, but this absolutely made my entire week. I will not stop thinking about this - I just know it. AHHHHHH. You're way too sweet!!!!