#i wish i didn't need A | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sae-something · 19 days ago

Text

sob and cry and drown in shame, it's almost 5pm and nothing from A and I don't know how to carry it (I will carry it) (I will see a friend in 2 hours and we will see a movie and have a drink and all will be fine) (but on another level I'm not fine) (very not fine) (yet I will carry it)

#i wish i had a mom i could text and she would call me and comfort me #i wish i didn't need A #i wish i didn't have all this pain and howling and trauma #i wish i didn't have all the prickly and raging and defensive parts #i wish i didn't get lost in the fog of losing clarity because of trauma responses and triggers and feelings #i wish i could live in the world where the people live who never got lost in pain and in themselves #i hurt #and in this moment that i write this #it feels unbearable #i know it isn't unbearable and i will be fine #but right now? unbearable #personal

7 notes · View notes