#i will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten (kaname x tatsumi | memoriastellarum )

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

[ THUMB ]:          while cupping the receiver’s cheek in their hand, the sender slowly glides their thumb across their cheekbone in a tender, sweeping caress. From Kaname, to Tatsumi.

Tatsumi had parked the car on an abandoned little parking lot, not too far from the shadow of Mount Fuji. The massive, impressive mountain hid the sky and was quite the remarkable sight... But not as remarkable as the boy in the passenger seat next to him.

Tatsumi had unbuckled himself and twisted his body so that he was facing Kaname properly, and while his hand had come to the boy's thigh, Kaname's hand was on his cheek, petting it tenderly.

"I was thinking..." Tatsumi mumbled while nuzzling against Kaname's hand. "Perhaps we... Ought to tell people about us? At least... Some of them." HiMERU would have his hide for it, he was certain, and he wasn't exactly prepared to tell him just yet, but... He didn't like sneaking around. He wanted to showcase Kaname to the world, loud and proud because Kaname deserved nothing less.

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

[ HOLD ]: as soon as the receiver opens the door and realizes the sender is there, sender wordlessly opens their arms out, and gives the receiver a warm, sorely needed hug. From Kaname, to Tatsumi.

Tatsumi stared at the email, teeth worrying his lower lip. The thing with receiving emails from his father was that it always took him by surprise. Usually, the man was old-fashioned enough to simply send snail mail, which in turn meant that he wasn't expecting an express answer. With emails though, Tatsumi could see the judgmental look in his eyes if Tatsumi didn't hurriedly reply as soon as possible, along with the choice words he might have for him later on. Sloth was a sin, he needed to repent... And all that.

But, may the Lord have mercy, I do not wish to talk with you right now...

He was brought from his thoughts by the knock on the door, and he pushed his chair back, getting to his feet on shaky legs. Ah, he was still a bit exhausted, huh... "I'm coming~!"

He opened the door and found himself face to face with Kaname. Purple eyes widened and he was about to say something along the lines of 'how nice to see you' or 'can I help you', but his words were cut off before they had even left his mouth as he noticed the younger boy opening his arms, inviting him in. A quick glance around, no one was nearby it seemed, and Tatsumi succumbed, allowing himself to more or less stumble into the embrace.

"...What's this...? Um... Hi."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

❰❰ ALMOST ❱❱ our muses almost kiss but don’t or are interrupted before they do. To Tatsumi, from Kaname. My favourite.

The mood had very subtly changed from just a casual conversation to... What was this? There was a sort of electricity in the air, Tatsumi felt, that almost made the hairs on his arms stand up straight. He was so very... So very aware. Of Kaname. Of his closeness. Of the sound of his breath, and the lilt of his voice as he spoke. He moved closer to him, almost unconsciously, and Kaname seemed to do the same. What were they even talking about? He couldn't just... Quite... Remember. There was a strange buzzing in his ears and his face felt heated.

"I..." Close. So close. Kaname's body, and his lips and...

"Hey, sorry, just gotta grab my stuff..." Sazanami Jun, who seemingly didn't even register that he was interrupting... Something. There in the room and then gone again, clearly in a hurry. Was he running errands, perhaps?

Tatsumi shook his head, trying to clear it, and simply stared back at Kaname. "...Oh, my."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

It's pretty late, so Kaname tries not to stomp as he makes his way through the halls. He shouldn't have even been out in the first place-- but he has priorities, contrary to how things look at the moment.

To think, he'd spent all day stupidly unaware that it was Tatsumi's birthday! He'd almost missed it, since no one had thought to inform him. He isn't a mind reader or anything like that-- so how was he supposed to know? As it turns out, he'd overheard some other students chatting about it, which made him all the more… well, what? Furious? Embarrassed? Jealous? It doesn't matter. What matters is what precious little time and means he'd had to set the record straight.

He feels a little bad when it appears as though Tatsumi is sleeping… but not bad enough to change his mind. He crawls right onto the bed, straddling the other's chest, and shakes his shoulder a few times, gently.

(It occurs to him that they find themselves in this position strangely often. But that's not his fault, really. Somehow, it just seems like the best way to get his point across… the best angle from which to reach.)

❝Tatsumi-senpai,❞ he hisses, as though he's trying to be quiet for the sake of others. He isn't, though-- it's more of a stage whisper, to judge it fairly.

❝You should have told me it was your birthday.❞ Oh, he's pouting. Intensely. But he shakes the bag a bit that he'd propped up beside him to call attention to it. Inside is a sweater-- and that's all it is, since the catacombs get chilly, simple and in a deep, rich red that, in hindsight, isn't all that fitting.

Too late to scruple over colours now.

❝You're lucky I got you anything,❞ he adds with an indignant huff, before softening it almost apologetically by adding, ❝I didn't think I'd be able to… But I didn't get caught, so here. Happy birthday.❞

Birthdays? Birthdays wasn’t something that was high on Tatsumi’s priority list. Least of all when it came to his own. They came once a year and then they passed, and he felt no wiser for it, so why make a big deal out of it? He certainly didn’t and if his ‘friends’ – bootlickers or followers or yes-men if you wanted to be crasser about it – hadn’t reminded him almost first thing that happened this morning, he would have completely forgotten about it. It was the end of the year after all, and there were so many other things to consider. They were just at the tail end of Christmas, the birth of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, which was a far more important birthday to consider, and New Years was coming up, something that held great importance for the Japanese people at large. The celebrations, discrete as they were, had continued throughout the day however, with boys handing him little gifts here and there, others who cheered for him and one of the teachers who summoned him for an awkward moment of sitting down for a cup of tea and some half dried mochi.

Again, he really didn’t see the point.

He was surprised though, mildly so, that he hadn’t seen hair nor hide of either Sazanami or HiMERU throughout the day. But he supposed they had their own issues to deal with, and he could understand how that would take priority for them. He didn’t blame them in the least, because why should he?

He felt a little odd though, once he finally settled down to sleep, but he was exhausted – wasn’t he always exhausted nowadays? Sometimes worryingly so. It was like no matter how much he slept, he never, ever felt rested – and he quickly drifted off to sleep…

…Only to be woken up by a heavy weight upon his chest and his eyes snapped open, disoriented at first, a seed of panic glinting in his eyes before he realized who it was that had planted himself on top of him.

“Hi—HiMERU-san…?” It took Tatsumi a moment or two to properly realize what the younger boy was talking about. Oh. Whispering. Right. That ought to be it, no?

“…I forgot… Anyway, you… You shouldn’t have. It’s dangerous, HiMERU-san…!”

“Why?”

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

Kaname's gaze remains fixed on the flower crown in his hands for several long seconds. Idly, he rubs a fragile silk leaf between his thumb and forefinger, noting the subtle texture of the seam. It matches his outfit, naturally; he thinks it's a little sterile, though. A little too perfect. He's come to think in recent days that some things might just be better suited to untidiness.

He finally tugs it gently onto his head, checking in the mirror to be sure it's perfectly aligned. Thus satisfied, he glances over to his companion, and a little thrill races through him again at the idea that they're about to work together, his previous thoughts nearly forgotten.

Nearly.

❝Someday, I'd like to learn how to make one of these... a real one. That can be done, right? The idea had to come from somewhere.❞

Tatsumi sat on the rather uncomfortable plastic chair, as straight as he possibly could to keep from wrinkling his own outfit. A silk flower crown - less elaborate than Kaname's, more... 'masculine', perhaps - rested on top of his head, its colors a shade more muted than Kaname's, but still matching nicely.

Bad leg stretched out before him, Tatsumi gently moved it from side to side to keep it from locking up before the performance, and he smiled warmly at the younger man, hands folded neatly in his lap.

"Oh, it can definitely be done. In fact... I've made a few of them myself. When I was a child." He chuckled, bashful all of a sudden. "...Well, eventually my father found out and I wasn't allowed to anymore, because flowers aren't... Manly? I suppose." It was all rather silly.

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

💕 From Kaname, to Tatsumi. got em | send 💕 to just grab my muse & kiss them! - Always accepting ;D

It wasn't like they were doing anything in particular, simply hanging around and enjoying each other's company. Tatsumi was flipping through a book, making small annotations here and there and Kaname was playing some game or the other on his phone. At least he had been... But the beeping stopped. Or had it stopped a while ago? Tatsumi wasn't sure, but as the younger boy leaned closer, a smile flickered across Tatsumi's features and he discretely bookmarked the page he had reached and closed his book. Just in time, it seemed, because it looked like Kaname was in a clingy sort of mood, as proven by the kiss that the bluehaired boy pressed against his lips. Tatsumi allowed his hands to come to a rest on Kaname's hips and he hummed softly against his lips.

"What's the occasion~?"

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

Kaname visits Tatsumi in the hospital, bringing with him a white bouquet of camellias and lilies.

White camellias meant 'waiting' in hanakotoba. White lilies 'purity' and 'chastity'. Tatsumi, who sat propped up against the short side of the bed against quite a few pillows, an IV in his arm and dark bags under his eyes in a face that was a little too skinny and quite wan, had to wonder if Kaname knew, or if he had simply picked the flowers at random.

"They're lovely," Tatsumi said, voice hoarse and thin. "Thank you... But... Do you really have time to be here, HiMERU-san?"

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

Kaname holds Tatsumi from behind, resting his chin on the other boy's shoulder. "This may seem like it's coming from out of nowhere," he mumbles thoughtfully, idly rolling a bit of the fabric of Tatsumi's shirt between his thumb and first two fingers, "--but have you ever considered something else? After everything that happened... if you couldn't be an idol, what would you do?"

Tatsumi made a small sound in the back of his throat. If he was clearing it up or simply humming was perhaps difficult to tell, but his hand came down to rest on top of Kaname's, and he leaned his head backward a little so that he could get at least a glimpse of Kaname's face. "Sometimes I have wondered... All those hours spent in the hospital I couldn't help but wonder. It's not... It's not an easy path, but perhaps I would try for priesthood." He smiled crookedly. "Or perhaps I'd work with commercials. Seems like I can get people to listen to me, can't I? ...To a certain point."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum​

Insert Kaname putting his hand on Tatsumi's thigh while he drives.  ;3c

Well!

That!

Was unexpected!

Tatsumi’s hands around the steering wheel tightened and his more or less perpetual smiling mask was for once replaced by a rather slack-jawed expression for a moment or two.

“Are you trying to get me to pull over, by any chance...?” Because as it were, they were driving (rather fast, of course) down a rather abandoned country road just outside of town.

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

[ SHOW ]  for sender to purposefully reveal their scars for receiver to see. From Kaname, to Tatsumi.

The words 'you really don't have to' died in Tatsumi's throat. If Kaname had steeled himself for this, which, Tatsumi figured, took a whole lot of bravery from the other boy, he wasn't going to stop him. Instead, he exhaled slowly, hands locked together in his lap, eyes on Kaname and only him.

"As long as you're sure," was what he opted for instead. "I really don't want you to feel uncomfortable."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

TENDER : receiver wakes up to sender caressing them gently; a hand carding through their hair, brushing hair off their forehead, a hand on their cheek, a thumb swiping under their eye. From Kaname, to Tatsumi.

The dream had to have been a nice one... But Tatsumi didn't remember it when he traveled the path from the land of dreams to the land of waking. It faded away, but something else replaced it that felt just as nice. Soft hands on his cheek, gentle touches... A hand in his hair, soothing and cool. His eyes opened and he found himself looking into a pair of golden yellow eyes, long blue hair falling in front of Kaname's open, strangely serene face.

"Oh... Mm, this is nice... What time is it?" Tatsumi reached himself, his arm coming to a rest around Kaname's narrow waist, slotted into the dip nicely, like it belonged there.

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

[home] – sender has no physical way of helping receiver out of this situation, but they offer out their hand anyway. just to hold onto (and to not let go). From Kaname to Tatsumi.

After having spent far too long in the bathroom, throwing up as it were - stress, nerves, fatigue, anything really - Tatsumi stumbled out of it, face wan and hands shaking. He smelled quite strongly of toothpaste, having brushed his teeth again and again, and he sat down in an armchair, legs refusing to hold him up any longer. Wow. He really hated talking with the Reimei academy teachers. Especially alone.

Not something he'd ever admit to anyone else though, if he could help it.

Familiar footfalls approached. He didn't need to look up to know it was Kaname. Not even when the younger boy's hand touched his, held onto it, did he look up. Not immediately. Once he did though, he made sure he was smiling.

"Hello there, HiMERU-san."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

[AWAKE] - for our muses to be lying awake together, neither one of them able to get (back?) to sleep. Kaname, Tatsumi. smh

"Have you ever tried counting the stars...?" Tatsumi chuckled into the darkness and rolled over onto his side, trying to see if he could make out the shape of Kaname in the dark. He barely could. "I guess that's a bit silly to ask when we're lying indoors like this... But if you forgo the scientific explanation about what stars are... I do believe that on a different plane, they're windows... Teeny tiny windows that allows us to see just a fraction of the glories of Heaven. And if there are that many stars out there, that many windows... Just imagine how vast Heaven really has to be. And there, somewhere, our Father resides, watching over us all..."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

✉ - push my muse back down when they try to get out of bed (perhaps involving illness, injury, or sleep deprivation). Another Kaname > Tatsumi. smh

Earlier that day, Tatsumi had found himself coughing up blood. Stress, an upcoming ulcer... Either way, it wasn't good, so he had - for once - done the responsible thing and taken to bed. However, after sleeping most of the afternoon and with a nagging feeling that he was letting people down bad, he had woken, probably too early, and sat up, ready to tumble out of bed even though his head was spinning and he felt generally unwell. He could just push it back for now, right?

But no. A hand was there and it took a moment to register that it was Kaname who was by his side, pushing him back down into bed. "But... I should get up, HiMERU-san..."

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

put a hand on my muse’s back to steer them somewhere. From Kaname, to Tatsumi. FFX verse.

The sun was setting over Kilika Island and the soft breeze that rustled through the thick forest was warm. A part of Tatsumi didn't want to leave. This was his home. He had grown up here, high up on the temple grounds, overseen with stern eyes by his father the Praetor. When it had been realized that he possessed summoning powers, everything had changed. He had known it would, which was why he had tried to keep everything secret, for a while. But even then, he knew that he one day had to step up and accept his role - even though it meant certain death - because his faith in Yevon was strong and his love for his people even stronger.

Still. Still.

The day of departure was at hand. (Night, rather.) And to leave... It did feel bittersweet. He would never return here. Not ever.

A hand on his back, and he turned his face to look at the boy at his side, offering him a pale smile.

"Is it time to go, Kaname...?" He sighed, turned around, his back now facing the stairs leading up to the temple, and he started with slow steps - he walked with a pronounced limp - toward the docks.

"Are you... Excited?"

[awesomeuchuu]

@memoriastellarum

Kabedon. From Kaname, to Tatsumi. | Kabedon Meme (always accepting!)

Kaname's face was decidedly adorable, all squished up in... Anger? Frustration? Excitement? Tatsumi couldn't quite decipher it, but whatever the yellow-eyed boy was about to tell him, or, perhaps, scream at him, would clear that up soon enough, he figured. Kaname had backed him into a corner of the sleeping quarters and it was almost thrilling, in a way. The unpredictability of it all certainly held a sort of... charm to it.

"A good evening to you too, HiMERU-san."