#i was very late and also an emergency c section and the doctors said i was born the size of a 3 month old | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

briamichellewrites · 2 years ago

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Mike and the guys had so much fun with Elliot! After the show, they hung out and talked with her while the stage was being taken down. They introduced her to the guys of POD, Hoobastank, and Story of the Year. Hoobastank was from Agoura Hills, California. The same town as Linkin Park. P.O.D. was from San Diego while Story of the Year was from St. Louis, Missouri. She only knew one song and that was The Reason by Hoobastank.

That was fine. She enjoyed listening to them. It was late and she had to get up early for chemotherapy. She didn’t care because she was having too much fun. With the change in weather, she put her new hat back on. Mike came over and bent down to her level. She was tired but he could see genuine happiness in her eyes. The band was going to attend the premiere of the second Matrix movie.

Did she want them to say hello to anyone? Keanu Reeves. He laughed and told her he would do that! That was the only actor she could think of. He was supposed to be very nice and humble. Has she seen the first Matrix movie? She did once, but she didn’t remember where. It was an interesting movie about things she couldn’t understand. Future technology? It was something like that. He had a feeling he would love to know that she had seen it.

“Phoenix and I have decided that when we get back from being on tour, we are going to get a puppy.”

“Oh my god! You finally get your puppy!”

He laughed. “We want to take you with us to help pick one out. We might let you pick out a puppy or a kitten, as well.”

“That is the best news ever! Like, forever!”

“You are adorable when you’re excited. We have to get going soon. I’ll have the other guys come over and say goodbye.”

He hugged her and said I love you. Phoenix, Chester, Rob, Joe, and Brad also came over to say goodbye. They would miss her but they would see her when they came home. She and Brad left with her stuff. It was one in the morning and he had to help her to the bathroom before going to bed. The next morning, the band talked about how fun it was to have her with them.

She had a permanent smile on her face and happiness in her eyes. At the hospital, she lay underneath her blanket while getting her treatment. George was with her because Brad had to attend a doctor’s appointment with Anna. It was likely their baby would be coming sooner than later, as Anna was looking to get induced. She was eight and a half months pregnant but her body wanted to deliver the baby now. He had called him very last minute to see if he take his place.

He explained the emergency. Oh, yeah. He could do that. Thank you! She understood the emergency and why her father couldn’t be there. As the drugs went through her veins, they went through her shoebox of photographs she had taken over the years while on different movie sets with Brad. She loved taking photographs because every location was different.

They got to see the progression of her age. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. Because of Brad and Anna’s affair, the photos didn’t show her at fifteen or sixteen because she was in zero contact with them. At twelve, she was still a child but at fourteen, she was a young lady. He enjoyed going through the photos with her because they were taken from her perspective. They also showed her silly and outgoing personality. It took them an hour to go through them.

Her favorite thing to do was go to the store and get her photos developed whenever she was back in LA. She would then go through them with Anna and Mike. The box was set aside, so it didn’t fall over and spill out.

Anna and Brad were extremely anxious. They had decided to have a c-section because the placenta had detached and the baby would die if they didn’t do something soon. He was allowed to be there during the procedure. Before they knew it, the baby was taken out of her. She wasn’t crying. His heart sank as they took it over to be examined and cleaned. A suction was placed into her mouth to clear her lungs. Once they were, she screamed her little head off.

They breathed a sigh of relief, as they both cried tears of happiness and relief. She was brought over, so they could see her. Oh my god! She was beautiful! Anna was stitched up and brought into a room to recover from her surgery. She would be unable to hold Shiloh until she recovered because of her stitches. They learned she was completely healthy.

After she was cleaned up and examined, she was given a diaper and wrapped in a blanket with a little hat on her head before being handed to Brad. He looked at his little girl. She had no idea where she was. All she knew was that it was cold and loud. She wanted to go back to where it was nice and warm. The next month was going to be difficult with early mornings, late nights, diaper changing, feeding, burping, and little to no sleep but it would be worth it.

During lunch, Elliot had something different than her usual salad. She wanted to be daring and ordered a Barbecue Chicken Wrap with a Diet Coke. Her nurse jokingly asked if she was tired of her usual salad. Yeah, she was. George laughed as she wrote down her order. She was in a good mood and deserved to treat herself. A Diet Coke was not something she had that often, so it was a special treat.

“Mike and the band are going to the premiere of the new Matrix movie.”

“That’s going to be fun! Are they in the movie?”

“No, they have a song on the soundtrack. That’s why they were invited. I told Mike to say hello to Keanu Reeves for me. He said he would do it.”

“I’ve met him. He is one of the nicest guys.”

“That’s what Mike said. Maybe I’ll make a movie someday and cast him or produce a movie he’s in.”

“You can tell him about your animals. What kind of animal are you going to adopt?”

She didn’t know yet because she was going back and forth between a puppy and a kitten. Did Bruce like other animals? Yeah, his breed was very friendly to animals and humans. Then, she didn’t need to worry about that. She could get a medium-sized dog because she had more room. Did she let Bruce ride on her lap? Yeah, he loved that! One time, they went on a walk outside and he stayed on her lap the entire time. She wrapped him up under her blanket to keep him warm.

Then, he fell asleep. When they got back home, her companion put him into his bed still fast asleep. He was quite confused when he woke up. George laughed. Did she ever fall asleep in one place and wake up in another? Maybe when she was younger.

Sometimes she fell asleep in her dad’s trailer and had to be woken up to go back to the hotel. She would sometimes forget that she had done that because she would be half asleep. It was kind of the same thing. Maybe she would name her new animal, Matt Damon or something similar. Why? She didn’t know. It just sounded funny to her. He would have to get on his ass about visiting her.

My dad and Anna had their baby earlier today. It was an emergency c-section. George is keeping me company today. I’ve decided to be daring and order a barbecue chicken wrap with a Diet Coke. Tell Phoenix for me, please. – Ellie

@zoeykaytesmom @feelingsofaithless @alina-dixon

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animeomegas · 4 years ago

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Omega!Shouto Pregnancy Emotions

Anon: This is a request take it if you like haha-Okay how is Todoroki (Shoto) while being prego? Does he get super sexual? Insecure? Happy? Moody? Scared? What does he feel and how do you react to those feelings?

(Hmm, okay, here are some of the primary emotions for Shouto during pregnancy. I hope you enjoy~)

Warnings: None

Some of the main emotions that impact Shouto Todoroki during his pregnancy:

Pained:

Because of Endeavour’s less than stellar parenting style and discriminatory beliefs towards omegas, Shouto’s reproductive system isn’t especially healthy. For that reason, some parts of pregnancy are more painful for Shouto than they would be for most other omegas.

One of the impacts is that the doctors recommend a c-section delivery. Male omegas have a higher risk of needing a c-section than female omegas in general, but Shouto’s hips and pelvis are not very flexible, so he’s at an even higher risk. His hips are not used to shifting, something that he should have experienced gradually starting from teenagerhood but did not because of the super strong suppressants he was on.

So, while he’s pregnant, the following things cause him a lot of pain:

Stomach aches – his stomach is flush against his uterus which is not behaving normally and giving him some problems. It upsets his stomach and it’s something that lasts for his entire pregnancy.

Lower back aches – his hips do try to widen in anticipation of delivering a baby, but it doesn’t work very well for him and is quite painful.

His chest – the doctors are originally unsure as to whether Shouto is going to be able to breast feed. They give him some extra hormones to stimulate milk production in the hopes that it will help. It does help actually, and Shouto is able to breast feed, but the hormones make his chest very swollen for most of his pregnancy. This is common in late pregnancy of course, but for Shouto it’s a little earlier than that and a little more jarring.

You felt helpless as you watched your mate curl up on the couch in pain, knowing there wasn’t anything you could do to fix it. He’d been having stomach and back pains all day and had to come home from work because they had been so bad. You’d also come home from work to pick him up and take care of him. You sighed to yourself as you looked down at him. He was only three months along, but it was looking like he might have to stop working sooner rather than later. Shouto would be miserable if he was forced to make that decision, but there was nothing either of you could do about it.

Shouto’s huff of frustration pulled you out of your thoughts. He was fidgeting with the heating pad that was wrapped around the right side of his tummy. He had been having some trouble balancing his temperature since he got pregnant and he couldn’t warm his stomach by himself. Losing quirk control wasn’t uncommon during pregnancy but having to use a heating pad did make Shouto embarrassed at first.

“How are you feeling?” you asked, kneeling down onto the floor beside him.

“Fine,” came Shouto’s muffled voice from where he had his face buried in a cushion.

“You don’t look fine,” you teased gently, linking you fingers with that hand that Shouto was using to fiddle with the heating pad. “Is something wrong with the heating pad?”

“No,” he huffed. “It’s just too small.”

Without missing a moment, you replied with,

“That’s what she said.”

“Who said what?” Shouto questioned, eyebrows furrowed.

You snorted at the joke going over his head. He was never good at understanding innuendo humour.

“It doesn’t matter, my love. But the heating pad is too small? Is your back hurting too?”

Shouto nodded, nuzzling into the cushion and messing up his hair as he did it. You smoothed his hair back down with a hand.

“I know it only needs to go on my right side, but I still can’t get it to sit right.”

You hummed in understanding.

“You want me to go and get a second one from the shop? Or a hot water bottle or something? Unfortunately, I’m not sure we have anything else in the house.”

Shouto hesitated, seeming unsure.

“I really don’t mind going, this is my fault after all,” you joked, placing a hand on his small bump.

“You’re warm,” Shouto muttered.

“I’m warm?”

Shouto blushed and didn’t respond. A teasing grin settled onto your face.

“Do you want me to lay behind you?”

Shouto nodded vigorously but didn’t make eye contact.

You agreed, quickly gathering some water and snacks to put within arm’s reach, before you awkwardly climbed behind Shouto and pulled him flush against your chest to spoon him. You started to rub his stomach to settle him.

Shouto relaxed under your attention and closed his eyes.

“Try to get some sleep, Shouto.”

Embarrassed:

Shouto doesn’t really suffer from insecurity, but he does get quite embarrassed sometimes at the new way his body is now working.

One very embarrassing thing that I’ve already mentioned is that his control over his powers weakens for the duration for his pregnancy.

During late pregnancy, hiccups involve accidentally setting objects in the house on fire. Shouto can put them out very quickly, but he still finds the fact that his iron clad control has degraded to be very embarrassing.

Another embarrassing thing for Shouto is the limitations on his independence.

Eventually, Shouto can’t put his own shoes on, or clean himself properly and he has to rely on his Alpha for all of it.

(Well, at first, his chosen strategy is just to keep trying by himself until he basically gives his alpha an aneurysm when he almost hurts himself by accident.)

Shouto gets moody and embarrassed when he has to ask for help for small things.

But by far the thing that embarrasses him the most, is his weak pregnancy bladder.

Sneezing becomes a dangerous game for him between the bladder and the spontaneous fire or ice usage.

At one point, Shouto refuses to have sex with his alpha for a couple of weeks because he’s too nervous that he’ll…er… well, lose control.

To deal with all the embarrassment, Shouto’s alpha needs to just downplay any incidents as much as possible, even going so far as to pretend not to notice certain things. This would go a long way in reducing Shouto’s anxiety and embarrassment. Also, indulging him when he says he wants to stay at home because he’s embarrassed will help him a lot.

To summarise, pregnancy weakens the control he has over himself in many ways, and Shouto becomes very embarrassed when he’s reminded of that.

Unfortunately for Shouto, pregnancy being horribly embarrassing is a fact of life.

Clingy:

It is very common for pregnant omegas to feel a lot more possessive and clingier with their alphas.

Hormones are all over the place, and omegas are technically at their most vulnerable (barring heats) so it is a very normal instinct to want to be around the person who their instincts consider as the safest and most able to protect them and their unborn pup.

Shouto is no exception. He pouts when you have to leave the house. He is not impressed at all if you come home with the scent of another omega clinging to your clothes, even if he knows the scent. He calls you about fifteen times on the days when you’re at work, mainly to ask when you’ll be back (even though he already knows), tell you innocuous things about his day, or ask you to pick something up from the shops on your way home.

Shouto is big on cuddling as well, and whenever you’re both in the house, he demands cuddles all the time. He’s a very minimalist nester and so he normally just throws on one of your hoodies and drags a pillow and a blanket onto the couch, before dragging you to lay with him.

(Shouto goes through so many films whilst he’s pregnant because he rarely gets off of the sofa and he likes to have a film playing while he lounges.)

Basically, everything feels better when his alpha is with him. All his alpha needs to do is make sure they’re with him as much as possible, especially in his third trimester, when he’s the most anxious and clingy. (Avoiding getting too close to other omegas is also probably a good idea. Pregnant omegas, including Shouto, can get very worked up about that.)

Your lunch break had just started, and like every other day for the past month, the second your lunch break started, your phone would ring. You picked up your phone in anticipation. Any second now…

Bzzzt. Bzzzt.

You smiled automatically as Shouto’s name popped up. You quickly swiped to answer and held it up to your ear.

“Hey, Sho, how’s your day going?”

“Good,” he answered, and you could distantly hear the shuffling of blankets as he rearranged himself on the sofa. “I finished the film Midoriya recommended today.”

“Oh, and how was it?”

“It was good but, I also finished the crisps you bought for me yesterday while I was watching it. Could you bring some more home tonight?”

“Uh huh, of course, baby,” you said, picking up a pen to jot ‘crisps for Sho’ at the top of your to-do list.

There was silence for a few moments as you listened to Shouto continue to shuffle around.

“When are you going to be back?”

“You know when,” you laughed gently. “Asking me isn’t going to make time go faster.”

Shouto whined into the phone, and you immediately sat up straighter. That wasn’t his normal reaction.

“Shouto? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I…” you could hear a small sniffle through the phone.

“Hey, hey, hey, what’s wrong, sweetheart? Do you want me to come home?”

“I… I’m sorry, you don’t have to come home, it’s okay.”

“Shouto, you’re freaking me out, tell me what’s going on?” you tried to keep your voice steady to soothe him, despite your own worries bubbling at the surface.

“No, it’s just that,” a small sob escaped him. “Your hoodie doesn’t smell like you anymore.”

You blinked for a moment before sagging in your chair in relief. It was pregnancy hormone induced crying, not emergency crying.

“It’s okay, Sho,” you cooed. “I’ll be home soon, and I’ll scent it as much as you want, I promise.”

“Hmm, okay…” he sniffed. “But come home quick, please.”

“I will, if we hang up now, I can work through my lunch break and head home early, sound good? Maybe you should watch another film and the time will go more quickly?”

“Okay… Goodbye…”

“Goodbye sweetheart, I love you and I’ll see you soon.”

#shouto todoroki #omega!shouto #omega!todoroki #alpha!reader #gn!reader #reader insert #abo #a/b/o #omegaverse #headcanons #mpreg #shouto x reader #todoroki x reader #scenario #pregnant todoroki

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babymetaldoll · 4 years ago

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Baby Reid (Spencer Reid/Reader)

Requested: Yes

Matthew x reader, his wife (the reader) goes into labor, and the next story is the same thing but spencer Reid x reader.

A/N: This was fun to write! tomorrow I’ll post MGG’s story

Summary: Spencer Reid is about to be a father, and he can't stop thinking about everything that could go wrong.

Pairing: Spencer Reid/Reader

Category: Fluff

Word count: 2K

Warning: I curse like a sailor

Masterlist

You can also read Baby Gubs

That was it. It was the moment (Y/N) and Spencer had been waiting impatiently for the last couple of weeks. Being pregnant was the most amazing experience of her life; (Y/N) still couldn't believe she was carrying a little baby Reid inside her. But after 40 weeks, she wanted it to end. It was time to have that baby.

But baby Reid wasn't ready to face the real world just yet, and their little princess was three days late after the due date. The doctor had told the couple if it passed from Sunday, they would do a c-section. Lucky for (Y/N), that Friday afternoon, baby Reid decided it was time.

(Y/N) was all alone, reading a book, lying on her bed, enjoying a big bowl of chocolate ice cream, when suddenly, it happened. Her water broke. She had been feeling contractions for the last hour, but after three false alarms, she wasn't concerned at all until she felt her legs all wet.

Trying to remain calm, she grabbed her phone and dialed Spencer's number. Aaron knew they were about to be parents and had given Reid only desk duty those last couple of weeks so that he could be there for the birth of his daughter, Helena Reid.

- "Hey Buttercup, how are you?"- Reid was swamped in paperwork when he received his wife's call- "I was about to go out for lunch with Penelope."

- "I think you might like to reschedule that"- (Y/N) smiled for a second until a powerful contraction left her speechless for a moment.

- "Why? what is it?"

- "Your daughter decided to come and meet us. This time it's for real."- Spencer's heart stopped, and his hand started shaking immediately.

- "Are you sure?"- he whispered and closed his eyes. He was about to have a panic attack, but he had to remain calm. He had to, no matter what, for the sake of his wife. So, he did his best and talked to her in the most soothing voice possible.

- "Yes, honey. My water just broke"- Reid's heart stopped again.

- "H... ho... how often are the contractions?"- Spencer cleared his throat and packed all his things as fast as he could, considering he was too nervous to remember what to put in his satchel.

- "Every eight minutes."

(Y/N) knew Spencer was freaking out. He told her he was mentally prepared for that moment, and he would be a rock for her. But she knew better. Spencer could pretend to be calmed, but deep inside, he was going to be hyperventilating.

- "I'm on my way, give me a second"- he stood up and bumped into Penelope- "Garcia, I can't have lunch with you. (Y/N) is in labor! I have to take her to the hospital."

Penelope wide opened her eyes and started hyperventilating immediately.

- "Is that her on the phone?"

- "Yes! I have to go now."

- "I love you, munchkin!!"- Garcia yelled- "I'll see you at the hospital, I'll tell the team, they were on their way back from New York"- Spencer nodded and ran to the elevator.

- "I'm here, buttercup. Keep talking to me, ok?"

- "Ok... so... tell me about your morning."

- "It was boring. Nothing exciting happened until I found out I'm about to be a dad."

(Y/N) smiled and tried to concentrate on her breathing, keeping it as slow and relaxed as she could.

- "Are you ok?"- he asked, so concerned and excited he forgot which way to go to get to his car. He had started driving to work when they got pregnant, in case of any emergency.

- "Yes, just breathing... I can't stop thinking, do we have everything we need?"

- "Yes, don't worry, babe. We are ready,"- Spencer reassured. Those words were not just for her, but also for him too- "How is the pain?"

- "On a scale from one to ten? Like a four. I can deal with it until we get to the hospital."

Spencer drove as fast as he could, trying to think like Morgan behind the wheel. He had argued against the way he drove for years, and now, Reid was doing exactly everything he had disagreed with.

- "I'm parking outside"- he announced his wife, but she didn't reply- "(Y/N), babe..."

- "I'm here"- she whispered- "Pain is starting to go from four to six very quickly."

- "It's ok; it's ok. I'm almost there."

Reid opened the door of their apartment and ran to their bedroom. (Y/N) had taken the bedsheets and was now trying (and failing) to put clean sheets in it.

- "No, buttercup"- Spencer nearly yelled and stopped her- "Leave that, come on, let's go."

- "Sorry, I just didn't want to leave the bed with..."

- "It's ok, I'll take care of that later. It doesn't matter"- (Y/N) felt his arms around her waist as they walked towards the door. That's when she stopped and squeezed his hand.

- "Breath, buttercup, you are doing awesome."

- "Shit, they are getting worse"- she mumbled and tried to think of anything else- "The bag is in the car?"

- "Yes. And we'll call your midwife and your parents from the car."

(Y/N) nodded and started walking again, but stopped all of a sudden.

- "Wait, come here"- she tugged his hand and wrapped her arms around his neck- "You are gonna be a dad, Spencer"- and the smile that appeared on his face was enough to light a whole city.

- "I love you so much, buttercup"- he kissed her lips sweetly and sighed- "You are incredible."

- "Remember that in case I turn into a monster when the pain gets worse"- she smiled and felt his lips on hers again.

- "Noted."

After six hours in labor, (Y/N) was turning into a monster. She was uncomfortable and in pain, and baby Reid had decided to take her time.

Spencer had prepared for months for that moment. He kept everything you might imagine in his car that could help (Y/N) be comfortable during the whole labor process. Spencer had to be ready whenever the moment came. He played her favorite playlist, and he gave her tummy massages with essential oils to help her relax. Nothing was working, but he meant well.

He had read every book about parenthood he could find. And though he was more than prepared for that moment, he was too scared and worried to think straight.

- "Come on, Helena"- Spencer kept talking to the tummy and held his wife's hand as she tried to get some rest- "Your mom and I want to meet you"- the hard grip on his hand let him know his wife was in the middle of a contraction. They were every three minutes now.

- "We'll only have one kid,"- (Y/N) whispered, and Spencer smiled. He moved closer and kissed her temple- "I know we said we wanted three babies, but one is all I can take."

- "You know, many women often claim to forget all the pain of labor after giving birth. It's called the 'Halo effect'"

- "We'll see if that theory is real soon, I hope."

Spencer was trying to soothe her, though someone should be calming him too. He was scared anything could go wrong. Statistics were hunting his mind the whole time. If something went wrong, if something happened to his wife and daughter, he would lose his mind.

- "How is she?"- Penelope asked Reid when he appeared in the waiting room. The rest of the team was there, waiting for the news.

- "Tired. It's been six hours already"- he sighed and closed his eyes- "I feel so useless! there's nothing I can do to help her!"

- "Come on, Spence"- JJ rubbed his arm and smiled at him, trying to calm him down- "There's a lot of things you can do to make her feel better."

- "I know, but I'm scared of everything that might go wrong."- Reid confessed and sat next to Morgan- "What if..."

- "No"- Derek stopped him and tapped on his back a couple of times, as a way to shake those thoughts away from his head- "There's no room for "what if" today, pretty boy. No overthinking and no statistics. You have to be a rock for your wife, ok?"

Spencer widened his eyes, looking at Derek, and nodded. He knew his friend was right. It wasn't time to be scared. It was the time to support his wife, no matter what.

- "Ok, Mrs. Reid, let's see if you are ready"- the midwife walked in and smiled at (Y/N). She turned to her husband, who stared at her in a weird mix of excitement and panic.

- "Ok, mom,"- the midwife said, happily- "Are you ready to push?"

- "Fuck!!"- though (Y/N) had already the epidural, the pain was excruciating- "Let's do this."

While (Y/N) and her midwife were looking for a comfortable labor position, Reid took a step back and tried to breathe calmly. All the stories of birth going wrong were coming to his mind at the same time. What if the baby came in the wrong position? What if his umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck? What if (Y/N) bleed too much? What if her pelvis was too small?

- "Spencer!!"- he heard her yell suddenly, reaching out her hand to him- "I need you."

Those three words were the most powerful he had ever heard before. He held his wife's hand and kissed her forehead.

- "I'm here, I'm with you. Forever, ok?"- (Y/N) nodded and bit her lips tight- "Breath, baby, just breath."

- "I'm trying!!"

- "Come on, Mrs. Reid... on three, you can do this!! one, two..."

Spencer counted along with the midwife and held (Y/N)'s hand tight each time she had to push. He wished there was anything else he could do to make her feel better. If Reid could, he would go through the whole process instead of her, only to keep her from being in pain. He couldn't believe his wife was going to make him a dad. It was his whole life's dream, and now, it was about to happen.

- "I can see her head! Just two more pushes! come on!!"

- "I can't"- (Y/N) sighed and closed her eyes, exhausted- "I can't do this, I'm too tired."

Spencer carefully pressed a wet towel on her forehead and kissed her temples.

- "You can do this, buttercup, one more time."- he whispered in her ear.

- "I can't, honey... it's too hard."

- "I know it's hard, and I wish you didn't have to go through all this. But I know you are strong, stronger than me, by far."- Spencer held and kissed her hand. (Y/N) took a deep breath and made her best to push as hard as possible.

- "One more time!! Just one more time, Mrs. Reid"- the midwife said. Spencer kept his eyes locked on his wife and brushed sweetly the hair that covered her face. She looked at him and nodded, closed her eyes, and pushed one last time.

The crying of a newborn had never sounded so sweet. Spencer saw in slow motion how the midwife took his little daughter and placed it on (Y/N)'s chest. He couldn't move. He just looked at that scene with teary eyes, feeling his chest swelling with love.

- "She's so tiny"- (Y/N) whispered- "Hello, Helena, I'm your mommy, and he is your daddy. He loves you so much"- Spencer's chin quivered, and in a second, he was crying. There he was with his family. His wife and his baby. Everything he had ever dreamt of.

Spencer leaned in slowly, kissing his daughter's head carefully.

- "You are incredible"- he whispered to his wife and kissed her too- "I didn't think it was possible, but now I actually love you even more. You just gave me a family."

- "I'd give you everything you ever ask me, Spencer Reid"- she answered and kept her eyes on their newborn- "Just don't ask now, 'cos I'm a little tired..."- Reid smiled and shook his head.

- "With you two here, I've got everything I'll ever need."

#spencer reid #matthew gray gubler #criminal minds #spencer reid fanfic #criminal mind fanfic #dr spencer reid #baby reid #babymetaldoll writes

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senorarelojes · 4 years ago

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Fic: Heaven (1/1)

Thanks to @pinksyndication‘s recent take on a femslash version of Dilder, this idea came up. It’s a sort of sequel to the very first femslash Dalan fic I wrote last year. However, this is just a shameless excuse for smut though. Heed the tags below!

Additional tags: Femslash, pregnancy, kidfic, lactation kink, porn without plot

When the doorbell rang, Dav heaved a sigh of relief. She took the stuffed animals she’d been picking up off the floor and tossed them into Paris’s already overflowing toy chest, dusting her hands off before heading towards the door and swinging it open. As expected, it was a grinning Martina and Andie, carrying gift bags of yet more toys. “Where’s my goddaughter?” Andie demanded in lieu of a proper greeting, making her way into the flat as Martina trailed behind her.

“Hello to you too,” Dav muttered, although she was too exhausted to care about social niceties. Ever since she and Lana had welcomed Paris into their lives six months ago, uninterrupted sleep had become a luxury. Naturally, when a sympathetic Martina and Andie had offered to babysit Paris for a day so Dav and Lana could get some much-needed rest, they’d jumped at the offer.

“Oh, there she is!” Andie’s tone melted into sheer gooey delight when Lana emerged from the bedroom with Paris in her arms. Lana was the picture of exhaustion, with deep circles under her eyes and her hair in a carelessly tied ponytail. But Dav thought Lana had never looked more beautiful than she did now, even in an old t-shirt and yoga pants.

Back when they’d gotten married and decided to have a baby, they’d discussed it at length and consulted a fertility doctor. When the results showed Lana had the higher odds of carrying a pregnancy to full term with a sperm donor, it was something they both agreed on after much thought and discussion. Dav had done everything possible to help Lana during the pregnancy, but she understood that it had taken a physical toll on Lana regardless. They’d opted for a C-section, and Lana had also wanted to breastfeed Paris as much as possible.

Admittedly, since they’d become parents, it was harder and harder to muster the effort for romance. Paris slept in a crib in their room, and most nights Dav was too exhausted after work to do anything other than make sure both Lana and Paris had everything they needed. Dav couldn’t remember the last time she and Lana had made love, so she was hoping that they could take advantage of Martina’s and Fletch’s generous offer.

After Martina and Andie had finished cooing over Paris, Lana shuffled back to the bedroom while Dav handed over all the things her friends would need, such as Paris’s diaper bag, some bottles of breast milk that Lana had pumped earlier and a few changes of clothes, just in case.

“Call us if there is anything, all right?” Dav said to Martina and Andie, pressing farewell kisses all over Paris’s chubby pink cheeks. It pained her to actually let go of her daughter and watch her go off with someone else, but Dav knew Lana needed the break more than her. At least Dav got to leave the house for work, while poor Lana was stuck at home 24 hours a day.

“Have a good time, you two,” Martina called out, while Andie took Paris’s tiny hand and made her wave goodbye to Dav.

Closing the door with a sigh, Dav wondered where Lana was. Heading to the bedroom, she couldn’t help smiling when she saw Lana had already passed out on the bed, snoring softly. Tucking a blanket over her wife, Dav pressed a kiss to her forehead before going out to the living room to scroll through her phone and see if she could order them something nice for dinner.

***

Dav awoke with a start when her phone rang. She blinked sleepily, realising she must have been so tired that she had nodded off on the sofa, her phone still in her hand. It was Martina, who was calling to update her on a very happy Paris getting spoiled rotten at Auntie Andie’s house. “We’ll be happy to keep her as late as you want,” Martina offered. “Go have dinner, a nice bath-- something non-baby related.”

“Thanks mate,” Dav said, before yawning. It was only now that she realised Lana’s blanket was now draped over her instead. As she hung up, she saw on her phone clock that it was already past seven. Fucking hell, had she slept that long?

Getting up and stretching, Dav went to the bedroom to check on Lana, but the bed was already empty and neatly made. However, there was light under the bathroom door, as well as soft music playing. Dave knocked on the door, opening it when Lana softly called out, “Come in!”

When Dave laid eyes on a fully naked Lana soaking in the bath, her brain short-circuited.

Lana had her glossy brown hair piled up on top of her head in a messy bun, a few loose tendrils sticking to her damp cheeks. She was resting one foot on the edge of the bath, and Dav’s gaze roamed up the smooth pink length of her leg, right till where it disappeared into the water. Dav could also see the rounded tops of her breasts, peeking just above the water level. Lana’s breasts had expanded by about two cup sizes or so during pregnancy, which made Dav’s back ache in sympathy because Lana was already a C-cup before she got pregnant.

“Hey, love.” Lana flashed her a lazy smile, her eyes especially blue in the fluorescent light of their bathroom. “I saw you passed out on the sofa and didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Mmmm.” Dav licked her lips, taking in her fill of Lana’s breathtakingly beautiful body - or rather, the teasing glimpses of it not hidden under the bathwater. “Mart called, she said they’ll keep Paris as late as we want tonight.”

The corner of Lana’s mouth quirked up in a secretive little smile. “Whatever will we do with those few extra hours?”

Dav went over to kneel beside the tub, her hand cupping Lana’s peachy cheek as she bent down, their faces closer. “Oh, I can think of a few things.”

They slowly kissed for a good few moments, luxuriating in the short freedom of being allowed to do whatever they wanted without having to listen for Paris crying. Dav slipped her tongue into Lana’s soft, wet mouth, her nipples tightening at the sound of Lana sighing into their kiss.

When they broke apart, Dav deliberately kept their faces close, their lips brushing against each other’s whenever they said something. “Waiting for me in the bath like that,” she whispered. “Such a tease, aren’t you?”

Lana arched an eyebrow at her. “Me? A tease?” Her smile was widening. “I’m only a tease if I don’t follow through, Gahan.”

“Oh, you know exactly what you do to me.” Dave’s hand slipped under the water, a finger circling Lana’s left nipple and making her gasp. “Teasing me with your soft, wet, round tits like that--”

“Like them?” Lana’s grip circled around Dav’s wrists. “Been thinking about you touching them all day.”

Dav laughed against her mouth. “So you’ve not been wearing a bra on purpose then?”

Lana’s eyes widened with false innocence. “But I’m a good girl,” she said demurely, even as she spread her legs, pulling Dave’s hand down between them.

Dav couldn’t help moaning when she slipped her fingers into Lana's slickness. Lana’s beautiful blue eyes rolled up in pleasure as Dav slowly fucked her with careful impatience, Lana gasping when Dav’s thumb started circling her clit as well. They started kissing again, Lana playing with her own nipples while Dav ached to drag Lana out of the tub and into their bed.

As Lana’s hips started to thrust up against Dav’s hand, the water sloshed out of the tub and all over the floor, getting Dav’s clothes wet as well. Not that Dav cared, since both of them were just wearing whatever was comfortable and clean whenever they were home, but Lana stopped moving, her hands tugging on Dav’s hair in concern. “Your knees,” she muttered, even as Dav blinked at her. “They must be killing you.”

As reluctant as Dav was to stop touching Lana, she had to agree that her wife had a point. “Bed, then?”

“Agreed,” Lana said, before there was a glint of mischief in her eyes. “If we stay here, I can’t eat you out the way I want anyway.”

“Fuck the bathtub then.” Dav was up so fast and tearing off her wet clothes that Lana couldn’t stop laughing.

***

After the quickest of showers, they both moved to the bed, trading deep and slow kisses which were making Dav crazed with desire. Lana was insanely wet too, judging from how slick Dav’s fingers were when she slid them inside her folds again. Dav laughed as Lana pouted when Dav withdrew her fingers, just to playfully tease her, but it backfired when Lana started playing with herself, her hand delving between her thighs. The devious Lana proved she was more than Dav’s match as she brought her wet fingers up to her nipples, teasing them to hardness and leaving them moist.

“Fuck, Lana.” Dav couldn’t resist leaning down and sucking on those pink nubs, humming in approval when she could taste Lana’s slick all over them. Lana’s moans were getting louder and more and more broken as Dav lavished attention on those magnificent tits, gently squeezing them and massaging them, her mouth forming a seal over Lana’s right nipple as she began sucking in earnest.

At this Lana lost her mind and her usual cool composure, cursing and swearing as her fingers dug into Dav’s hair. Lana’s breasts were also leaking, and Dav moaned at the sweet, silky taste of her milk, her tongue running in figure-eights around her stiff nipple. No one could blame Dav for being obsessed with Lana’s tits, which were already magnificent to begin with. Motherhood had made them even fuller and rounder, and sometimes Dav daydreamed about feeling Lana up in public whenever they were at the shops or at a restaurant.

Well, nothing was going to stop her from taking her fill of Lana’s beautiful breasts now.

Dav’s mouth moved from left to right, nipple to nipple, making Lana sigh and moan and writhe under her like the world’s best temptress. Unfortunately Dav had to sacrifice a hand, letting go of Lana’s right breast so she could reach between Lana’s open legs and give her the first of many orgasms. Dav fucked Lana with her fingers while lapping up the pearly-white droplets of her milk, raising her head to watch when Lana shuddered through her first orgasm, wrecked and beautiful and ruined, her hair a messy halo around her head.

“So fuckin’ gorgeous,” Dav whispered, leaning down to kiss her again. She thought Lana was still tapped out, so she was stunned when Lana cupped Dav’s tits, rolling her nipples between those talented long fingers. Dav loved the way Lana ogled her tits whenever she put on a sports bra or even a bralette, or would sometimes rest her head on Dav’s chest after a particularly tiring day.

“You’re so sexy.” Lana smiled up at her as she played with Dav’s breasts, her cheeks flushed with her earlier orgasm. “I want to just watch you ride me. Can we do that?”

Whimpering, Dav nodded eagerly as she clambered onto her knees, Lana reaching over into their bedside table for one of the dildos they kept there. Since Dav was already so wet, they didn’t even bother with the lube; Lana easily slid it into Dav’s body, watching with an open mouth as Dav rocked back and forth over Lana.

“Look at you, so eager to get fucked,” Lana said admiringly, her eyes roaming up and down Dave’s body. “You’re the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen.”

“Fuck me,” Dav begged, reaching down to play with her own clit while her other hand played with her nipples. “Please, Lana--”

“After I watch you come on this, I’m going to take this out of you.” Lana gave a particularly hard thrust with the dildo, which made Dav sob with pleasure. “And lick all your juices off it. Then I’ll eat you out until you can’t walk--”

Bending down, Dav’s mouth sloppily crashed on top of Lana’s, the two of them frantically kissing as Lana sped up her movements, Dav’s body swallowing the entirety of the dildo except for its flared base. Dav was teetering on the edge, so close to orgasm until Lana slid out the dildo and replaced it with her fingers instead, her intent blue eyes watching as Dav moaned her release in Lana’s arms.

***

It was almost eleven when the doorbell rang again. Dav’s eyes flickered open when she heard Lana making her way to the door, then muffled voices as she thanked Martina and Andie for watching over Paris. After a while, there was silence again - which meant their friends had left. Dav sleepily made a mental note to text them a thank-you when she was more awake later - and less wrecked - and perhaps add a gift voucher to Martina and Andie’s favourite spa.

Lana padded back into the bedroom, gently carrying a sleeping Paris in her arms. Laying their daughter back down into the crib, Lana started packing away the bags Dav had passed to Martina and Andie. When Lana spotted Dav’s half-open eyes, she smiled. “Go back to sleep, love.”

One last important thing on Dav’s mind. “Baby?”

“She looks well. We should blackmail Mart and Andie to get them to do this again.”

Snuffling a laugh against the pillow, Dav patted the bed. “C’mon to bed, love.”

Dav had almost nodded off to sleep again when she felt the warm press of Lana’s lips against her forehead. “I’ll be right there.”

#dalan #femslash #lactation kink #pwp #if anyone is interested #i'm most probably updating home later #and aiming to update something else in a few days

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anotheronechicagobog · 4 years ago

Text

Bulletproofness and Playing God Jay Halstead x reader

written by: @anotheronechicagobog

requested by @confusedpimp, I hope you like it!

warnings: swearing, addiction, Hannah Asher is NOT porprayed well in this you have been warned, malpractice, emergency c-section complications, involves Chicago Med episode ‘Do No Harm’, police being idiots and assholes, warrants served incorrectly, drugs, drug dealers, bad neighbourhood created by systematic oppression and gentrification, Will is a prick with issues, and canon compliant violence

A/N: I am very sympathetic and supportive of people who have addictions because not only are there a tone of genetic factors that weigh in on it, but environmental factors that most people have very little to no control over. That being said, I am strongly against people with addictions working in healthcare, first responding, and/or law enforcement who spend most of their time with vulnerable people who don’t have much of a choice about whether to trust them or not. If someone works in an area where they have someone’s life in their hands they cannot be addicted to a substance that will control their ability to make judgements, affect how/their ability to work, and function as a whole.

In the past eight months, a warrant has been served to your apartment twenty-one times. You haven’t done anything wrong, the name on the warrants was always for your upstairs neighbour, did this make being woken up and the fucking crack of dawn and being interrogated (sometimes arrested) any easier? Not even a fucking bit. So you weren’t surprised when at 3:28 am, your door was busted open (again), heard shouts of “Chicago PD!” (again), and heard your house being “cleared” (again). You groaned and sat up, holding your hands up. Your bedroom door was thrown open with a bang. “I am unarmed, Marcus Evans lives in the apartment upstairs, and I have no association to him.” In the blandest voice possible, you recited the statement the legal aid at your university wrote you. “Uh... Sorry? Hey, Sarg, I think I’ve figured out why there were so many unsuccessful warrants on this place.” The blonde man was still pointing a gun at your head, but more members of his unit came to surround him.

“Can I put my hands down now? I have documents that prove I am innocent, that the warrant was served to the wrong address, again, and that the only connection I have to Marcus Evans is that he is my annoying upstairs neighbour.”

They all sheepishly looked at you. The Latina woman spoke up, “the apartment is clear of anything even remotely illegal. Well, aside from the power lines attached to her box outside that show that her neighbours have been stealing power and internet from her.”

‘Sarg’, an older man with silver hair with a surprised look on his face nodded. “Alright, put ‘em down and get us the papers.”

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Despite all the evidence that the warrant wasn’t meant for you, they still insisted on taking you down to the station. You refused since they couldn’t arrest you and had no grounds to hold you on, and Sergeant Voight did not like that. “I’m too tired to give a shit about what you want. I have three jobs, student loans, and university to deal with. The only things of value in my apartment are my crappy laptop and internet access. The only time I am ever here is to sleep. You already disturbed what little sleep I was able to get, and I have work in... Forty-five minutes. Just great. Please leave, and can one of you, for the love of all things holy put a note in the system that this is NOT Marcus Evans’ apartment?!” Everyone flinched at your outburst, all looking both sympathetic and annoyed except for Detective Halstead, he just looked very sad for you. “Of course,” he said as he handed you a business card, “if you could call me when you have time, we have some pretty important questions.” Sargent Voight shot him a look, one that clearly said ‘what the fuck are you doing? That’s not your call.’ “Okay. Now seriously, please leave.” Irritated and muttering under their breath, barring Halstead who gave you a smirk and a wink, they all left stepping over the splinters of the door you replaced three weeks before.

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The next day after entering your sparsely decorated apartment, dropping dead on your bed/couch, you heard the distinctive sounds of a door being broken down, followed by the police announcing themselves, and an apartment being searched... Above yours. They finally got the right apartment! Despite the ache in your muscles and bones, you jumped up and cheered. Complete and utter elation surrounded you and your soul. A few minutes into your dancing and celebrating there was a knock on the door. Smiling brighter than you had in years you answered the door. “Good morning detective!”

“Well, good morning to you too, Ms. Y/L/N. You’re in a much better mood.”

“To be fair, you guys busted into my apartment at three in the morning, again, and I just heard everything that happened upstairs, you guys finally got the right apartment!”

“Hey, we never served more than one warrant here.”

“Your unit only served one, but your brothers in blue served twenty-one. Destroying property, unlawful arrest, causing severe anxiety, and just general harassment for eight months. The only reason I didn’t move was because I couldn’t afford to. I’m just happy it’s over now, I’ll never have a Marcus Evans warrant served at my apartment again!” Halstead looked happy when you opened the door and your conversation began, but when you finally took a breath you noticed how guilty he looked. “I’m sorry.” He whispered, looking like he was in physical pain, before he nodded at you and walked away, leaving you feeling incredibly confused.

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Two days later you returned from two ten-hour shifts to Jay Halstead in front of your door. “Detective?”

“Please, call me Jay.”

“Alright, Jay, what are you doing here? Is everything okay with Marcus’s arrest?”

“Oh yeah, everything’s fine with that. I came here because of this.” He handed you a large manilla envelope. “What’s this?”

“Compensation. For everything that happened over the last eight months. And apartment listings in better neighbourhoods. Seriously, you need to get out of here, it’s way too dangerous.”

“Thanks for the advice, and the compensation, I’ll think about it. But it just might not be doable for me.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You couldn’t afford to move, something that irked Jay to no end. So he came around often. Dropping by with coffee and Irish breakfasts. Sharing his Netflix password and watching B99 together. Driving you home from work or university when it was late. The days grew shorter, and your hours of work grew longer. Jay worried. About you. About the number of hours you worked. About how much university work you had. About your health, how much (or little, really) you slept and ate, how you didn’t see the doctor as often you should (ironic considering you were in med school), and about how you never took time to relax, always jumping from one task to the next.

You slumped against the passenger seat of Jay’s truck, exhausted after working for thirty hours straight, ten at each of your jobs. “Okay, seriously, you can’t keep living like this. I have a spare room, I can get you a civilian job at my precinct. You are wearing yourself to the bone. Please, Y/N.”

“I get my residency assignment tomorrow. I quit today.”

“You did?”

“Yes.”

“All of them?”

“All three.”

“And you’ll move out of your apartment?”

“Nope.” Popping the ‘p’. Jay sighed and shook his head, before looking at your half-asleep form. “I’ll take you to the shithole you call a home.”

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TWO YEARS LATER

Jumping up and down you waited for Jay to open the door. The envelopes sitting on his coffee table glaring at you. You flopped onto his couch (that didn’t also double as a bed) and huffed impatiently. Fidgeting.

The door opened and you jumped up, startling your best friend. His cop/ranger instincts taking over. He stiffly dropped his jacket and yanked out his gun before aiming it for your head. Panic coursed through you, tightening your chest. Reflexively you put up your hands, not able to control the words that bubbled out of your throat. “I’m bulletproof... But please don’t shoot me.” Jay lowered his gun, laughing. “‘Bulletproof’? Really?”

“Hey, I panicked, shut up.”

“What’re you doing here, anyway? I thought you were taking another shift?”

“I was, but then Sarah’s plans fell through so she decided to take her shift back, plus I got my fellowship applications back!”

“Where did you get accepted?!”

“I don’t know I was waiting for you to get back to open them!”

“Well I’m here now, so open them!”

“Okay, okay, here we go; Honolulu general, accepted, Seattle Grace, no, but they had a bomb blow up there recently so I’m not heartbroken, Chicago med, yes, and Miami Dade Memorial, yes. Okay 3/4, that’s great! What do you think?”

“Well I’m biased, so Chicago Med, but it would be fun to visit you in Hawaii.”

“Hawaii is so expensive though, I’d probably have to have a part-time job to make rent.”

“In a decent apartment this time.”

“Two part-time jobs, then. So Hawaii is out, now Miami... It is hot there, beaches, the ocean, the food, but Miami Dade Memorial isn’t very prominent in the research department and the crime rate is awful in the part I’d need to live and work in. I mean I know isn’t a whole lot better but... It would feel a bit like moving from bad to worse, especially on my budget.”

“So that leaves Chicago...”

“It does, but I think I need to find a new place that’s closer to Med and filled with less dug dealers.”

“Please tell me this was a subtle way of asking if you can move in with me.”

“It wasn’t, but now that you bring it up, would that be okay?”

“YES! Oh thank fuck, you’re finally moving out of that rat’s nest! C’mon, let’s go get your stuff now!”

“But Jay I just paid this month’s rent-“

“Let’s gooooooooooo!”

——————————————————————————————————-

FOUR MONTHS LATER

Because your apartment was in such a “great location” (in the same building as three drug dealers) your landlord was willing to give half of your rent back. It had only taken you twenty-something minutes to pack your things and leave. Now you were starting your surgical OB/GYN fellowship, excited to not be working multiple jobs at once for the first time since you were twelve. While Jay’s brother, Will, worked at Med as well he worked in the ED while you worked in the gynecology unit and you were thankful you only had to work together for consults or in an all hands on deck situation because he could be a fucking prick. When you first met him years ago he spent two hours quizzing your medical knowledge, and he got annoyed when you got everything right and he couldn’t correct you. So when you got a consult from him your first week there, you were apprehensive. “Hey Y/N, treatment room four.”

“Thanks, Maggie.” You pushed back the curtain and were met with the sight of a pregnant woman clearly in immense pain and a frustrating ginger. “Dr. Asher is her OB but we can’t find her anywhere. She was on-call but I, and a couple of nurses, and her secretary have been blowing up her phone and we’ve got nothing back. This is her patient Sienna. She’s in a lot of pain but is refusing painkillers, you’ve been working with her a lot lately-“ You snorted. His facial expression hardened. “Just come out and say it Y/L/N.”

“First of all it’s doctor Y/L/N, second of all, I haven’t been ‘working’ with her, I’ve been taking care of ‘her’ patients because she’s almost never at work. She just cancels the appointments short notice and since these women are kind of on a timeline their appointments get reassigned to other doctors. She’s listed as their doctor on all the forms but she’s never even met half of them. Sienna is the only patient that Dr. Asher has seen more than once.”

“Don’t talk about her like that, you don’t know-“

“That she’s an addict? The entire OB floor knows we just don’t have enough proof to do anything about it. And don’t get me wrong, I know that there’s a lot of genetic components to addiction and I would be sympathetic if she wasn’t responsible for multiple lives at a time on a daily basis.” You turned on your heel and entered the room, done with Will Halstead and his bullshit. “Hi Sienna, my name is Dr. Y/N Y/L/N, and I’ll be filling in for Dr. Asher, I understand that you don’t want any drugs and while that’s fine, if your condition gets bad enough we may have to intervene but we’ll do everything we can for you and your baby, okay?”

“Where’s Dr. Asher? I need her here, she understands!”

“Okay, we’re still trying to find her okay?”

—————————————————————————————————

“So I heard that you and my brother locked horns today.”

“Your brother is a prick.”

“I know that he is, I’m just wondering what happened this time.”

“He’s doing this weird ethical-puppy love-guilt trippy-Romeo and Juliet level of doomed-unnecessary drama-thing going on and it’s completely affecting how he treats his patients. We already had one loose cannon we couldn’t disarm, now we have another. It’s come to the point that I’m genuinely worried about the patients that come into Med, and I don’t know what to do.”

“I’m sorry, I wish there was something I could do.”

“Just try not to antagonize Will, okay? He’s more on edge and that makes him erratic, I would really appreciate it if you wouldn’t make it worse.”

“Okay. I’ll leave him alone.”

“Thank you. I’m starving, what should we do for dinner?”

“Vietnamese is on the way.”

“Have I told you how amazing you are today?”

“Yes, but I would love to hear it again.”

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Dr. Asher’s medical negligence had finally caught up with her, and for once Will wasn’t even remotely involved. He and Asher were having one of their silent spats again when Asher dropped the ball, or baby rather, during an emergency c-section of a patient she misdiagnosed and mistreated because she was in need of a fix. The only reason the mother didn’t hemorrhage and baby didn’t crack his skull was because of your observations and quick reflexes. The baby was healthy and mom was recovering and you were fuming. After scrubbing out you approached the, understandably distressed, father and told him that on your best medical opinion he and his wife should file a malpractice suit for missing an easy and obvious diagnosis, screwing up a routine surgery, and almost killing his son seconds after he was born.

You met with him, his lawyer and Asher two days later in a conference room with Goodwin and Peter the Stressed Out Lawyer. You accused her of having an addiction. The father requested a drug test. Goodwin glared, you glared back. If she didn’t want it handled like this then she should have dealt with it months ago when you brought it up your second week at Med. She tried to approach you in the hall, condescension on the tip of her tongue when you levelled her with a glare so fierce it rivalled that of Godzilla. “You do not get to scold me like I am a child. I told you when I first got here that she has a problem. That she is a danger to everyone who comes into her care. That she is a danger to other doctors. That she is a liability. Do not bitch to me when I told a husband and father who almost his wife and son to her recklessness to sue. To get angry and fight back. Do not take that petty, catty, condescending tone with me because I went around you. You have absolutely no ground to stand on. Because. You. Were. Wrong.”

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You were surprised you had a job to come back to the next day. So was a very pissed off and ‘heartbroken’ Will Halstead. He kept running around to your colleagues, badmouthing you, trying to get them to join in and turn on you, but that didn’t happen. They not only agreed with you but rallied around you. Doctors are not gods. They do not get to ignore a patient’s wishes or act like they don’t have restrictions and limitations. It came to the point that Will told Jay he didn’t approve of you and that he had to dump you... Despite the fact that you weren’t dating.

Jay had rolled his eyes and pushed Will out of the apartment before giving you a hug and made you pancakes for dinner. “I’m sorry that I messed up your relationship with Will.”

“Don’t be. We’re brothers, we fight from time to time, and sometimes those fights are bigger than others and that’s okay. Will, well Halsteads in general, are pretty good at torpedoing any and all romantic relationships.”

“I’m sure that’s not true.”

“My parents only got married cause my mom got knocked up and fought non-stop, Will was and still is in love with Natalie but he was too controlling, secretive, and refused to tell her about Burke, and me... Lindsay and I were on a break before we left because my Vegas wife refused to divorce me and I didn’t tell her I had even been to Vegas.”

“Okay, so maybe it’s a little true, but it’s not because you’re bad people or Even just saying ‘yes there’s something going on but I don’t feel ready to talk about it with you’ would go a long way. Cause all you Halstead guys say is that you’re fine but you never are and if you lie to yourself you lie to your partner.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. And tell Will when his head is surgically removed from Asher’s ass. You’ve seen that he follows her around like a puppy, right?”

“Yup, everyone on the OB floor has been talking about it nonstop since he started his whatever it was with Asher.”

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EIGHT MONTHS LATER

Because of the suit, the hospital conducted an internal investigation in relation to Dr. Asher that pretty much everyone could confirm. Erratic behaviour and attendance, leaving other doctors to tend to her patients while keeping her name on the case files, and horrifying evidence of being high while working. Granted that had only happened twice and she literally just sat in her office staring at paperwork the whole time. Still, she was fired, the suit was settled, and Asher lost her license. You had destroyed her career and while there was a part of you that felt guilty, you knew that in the end she did the right thing. She refused help and kept carrying on in a way that would have been detrimental to more patients if other doctors hadn’t stepped in. Will still wasn’t talking to you and had started avoiding Jay recently because you two started dating.

Barring the tension from all the Will stuff, your relationship was doing well. You had great dates (both out and at the apartment), were radiating happiness together, and Jay was taking your words about communication to heart. Not once has the phrase ‘I’m fine’ dripped off of his lips. If he didn’t want to tell you something or was more comfortable talking about it with his therapist or Upton before you he’d let you know. Most times he would just talk about what was bothering him, even if it was only bullet points sometimes you both felt relieved that functional relationships were actually possible.

You were on a date with Jay at your favourite Jamaican restaurant when you ran into Hannah Asher. She did not look pleased to see you and quite honestly you could have lived the rest of your life happily if you never had to see her again. After a few seconds of glaring at you and your boyfriend, an annoying ginger put his arm around her. “Hi Will. How are you?”

“My girlfriend and I are doing well Jacob.”

“Really Will? You’re using my whole name because my-”

“Okay, you know what? Let’s go our separate ways. It looked like you guys were just leaving, and we’re probably confusing our poor hostess. So let’s both just walk away.”

“You ruined my life.”

“Asher-”

“You took everything from me!”

“Do you have any idea how many patients you almost killed in your time at Med? Because I do, and it’s a triple-digit number. You shouldn’t have been practicing in your condition and you know it. So you need to drop the victim act and walk away.” You saw her face contort into complete and utter rage, then everything is hazy. There were lights, bright red ones, and screaming, you were pretty sure Jay was there, and there was... Copper? Why did your mouth feel like it was full of liquid pennies? There was gurgling, was there a baby? Were they okay? You tried to speak, get up, look around, but you were too tired. You were begging yourself to move, to do something, but it felt like your bones turned into melting iron.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You didn’t remember waking up, or falling asleep for that matter, you were just looking at the glass door and suddenly it came into focus. You didn’t even know how you got to the ED, what happened at the restaurant. Dr. Choi entered your room apprehensively. “Y/L/N? How are you feeling?”

“Like I was mauled by a tiger.”

“That’s... Actually pretty close to what happened, honey.”

“Jay?”

“Hey, I’m right here. So, what’s the prognosis Choi?”

“Multiple contusions on the right side of the abdomen, lower back and around your neck, multiple lacerations all over your abdomen, forearms, and two on your head. Your liver was also perforated, we couldn’t stop the bleeding so we had to remove half of it, which you know means it’ll take a couple of months to grow back and you won’t be able to drink for around a year. We’re going to need to monitor you and run some tests, so you’re gonna be here for a few days.”

“Well I should hope so. What? Why are you two looking at me like I have eight heads? I could’ve died.”

“... You actually want to stay in the hospital and be cared for by your colleagues?”

“I trust you, besides I’ll only make things worse if I check myself out AMA, doesn’t matter how good of a doctor I am. It’ll be hard and I’m not going to enjoy it, but I have to stay here and get treated regardless so I might as well be as positive as I can about it.”

“You are officially my favourite patient.”

“And I love you even more.”

“Thanks guys, I appreciate it.”

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“What happened Jay? I don’t remember anything after telling her to walk away.”

“She went berserk. Attacked you. I tried to pull her off but Will lost his mind, telling me not to hurt her. I managed to toss him after a couple of seconds but I was too late. She’d already slashed you up and stabbed you twice. I grabbed her but she managed to get a bunch of kicks in while I was hauling her away from you all while screaming that she was going to kill you. I’m sorry that I couldn’t protect you. She’s sitting in a cell at the 21st right now with Platt breathing down her neck. We also did a drug test on her, she was high as all hell.”

“Please don’t feel bad Jay, I know that you reacted as fast and did as much as you could. And I know that Will did what he could to stop you. How is Will by the way?”

“He’s in the cell next to hers. He assaulted a police officer and was an accomplice in assault. Voight’s been asking if I want to drop the charges against him because he’s my brother. And I just don’t know, I wanted to talk to you first.”

“I don’t want to charge him. And I don’t want you to press charges either, but I won’t stop you if that’s what you want.”

“I don’t want him to go to jail, I want him to go to therapy. He needs it.”

“I wasn’t sure if I should say anything, but he really does. And I think you need to be the one to bring it up with him. We can do some research, too, and find psychiatrists that have their own practices so that it’s not connected to the hospital at all.”

“That sounds like a great idea, but I think you mean I do the research cause you are supposed to be resting and not doing any physically or mentally strenuous tasks.”

“Fine, fine. Just give Will a hug from me when you see him.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ONE YEAR LATER

The day of the trial had finally arrived and you were pissed off about it. The date of the trial was the same day as your due date. The defence had done everything they could to delay the trial, and when they finally settled on the worst possible day three weeks ago, you’d tried to have it delayed again because you didn’t want to give birth in a courtroom. The defence had convinced the judge to deny it, so here you were, sitting in a sweltering room that smelled like old wood and seventies carpet for five hours beside your husband behind the district attorney doing your best not to glare at the judge. “It’s going to be okay, honey, she won’t get away with anything, it’s cut and dry. The only real thing to do is to determine her sentence.” Jay kissed your forehead and placed his hand on top of yours on your protruding stomach. You winced. “She just kicked again, Jay.”

“That’s seven minutes apart.”

“I’m in labour, we need to go.” Jay nodded to your lawyer who motioned to the judge for permission to speak. “Your honour, my client is in labour, may we adjourn so that she and her husband can go to the hospital?”

“Objection your honour!”

“Ms. Asher, do not interrupt the prosecution. I’ve heard and seen more than enough evidence. Ms. Asher, you are hereby sentenced to twenty-five years in prison for aggravated assault and attempted murder. The court now is adjourned. Oh, and Dr. Y/L/N and detective Halstead? Congratulations.”

#One Chicago #Chicago PD #chicago med #jay halstead #jay halstead x reader #will halstead #Hannah Asher #sharon goodwin

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aperrywilliams · 4 years ago

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Her Eyes (Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader)

(Not my gif!)

Masterlist

———————

Summary: Spencer talks about things of his life with Reader.

Word Count: 4151

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences. Angst (so sorry)

Warnings: References to death and grief

A/N: So sorry... but I hope the end worth it. The idea came from “Jack y Sarah” movie.

——————–

It was not uncommon for me to wake up in the middle of the night because a nightmare was plaguing my mind. Given all the things that had happened in my life, I was used to it. Sometimes I even missed them. But when I met (Y/N), nightmares stopped. Just like time stopped too. Things began to move in slow motion. Seeing her walk down the hallways of the BAU was perhaps one of my favorite things every morning. I made sure to get there early every day to watch her get out of the elevator, walk through the glass doors, and watch how she sat next to her desk. At first, of course, she didn’t know about my existence. That changed when she was transferred to our team. There I had the opportunity to speak to her for the first time.

It took me eight months to ask her for a coffee date. Another six months to ask her to be my girlfriend. Finally, one more year to ask her to marry me. Although the last statement is not entirely true, I must be honest. She was who ‘suggested’ we could get married. I only bought the ring and chose the moment to pop the question.

Our wedding was simple, only our family and closest friends. Neither (Y/N) nor I liked expensive things, despite Rossi’s insistence on having a big event. The memories of that day are projected in my brain as if I lived them over and over again. She in her beautiful dress, smiling at me and walking to me down the aisle. That smile. God, I can see it now. The same smile was on her face when I came late from work one day: she showed me a positive pregnancy test. We both cried. We had been trying to get her pregnant for months. We wanted so badly to have a child. When she told me, I couldn’t hide my bliss. I think I’ve rarely screamed in my life: that was one of these times. I lifted her off the floor with an embrace that could have lasted an eternity. When we told the team, the hugs and congratulations continued. They were almost as happy as us. Although we knew this meant a change in our lives and at work. (Y/N) could not stay in the field anymore and would leave the BAU for a while. Time enough for our child would grow up a little.

The months of waiting were like that: waiting. A beautiful wait, I must say. Every morning when I woke up, I had the routine of giving two kisses: one on the lips of my beautiful wife and the other on her growing belly. I tried to live the pregnancy phase as intensely as I could by her side. Then, of course, the trips for work continued, but we arranged to enjoy every moment of the process.

“Do you want to know the gender of your baby, or will you wait until the birth?” the doctor asked us when she scanned (Y/N)’s belly on one of the ultrasound appointments. We had both discussed whether we wanted to know or be surprised. However, curiosity was stronger in both of us.

“Yes, we want to know,” (Y/N) said enthusiastically.

“It’s a girl,” the doctor said. I couldn’t contain my tears of emotion—a girl. And although I couldn’t know why I secretly hoped my baby would be a girl.

“She’ll be daddy’s little girl,” assured (Y/N), staring at me and laughing.

When we painted the nursery, we didn’t want to do something very extravagant. Our main idea was to get a calm and well-decorated place to have everything we could need, so we chose light tones and some children’s figures to give our daughter a unique space—our daughter, to whom we still could not choose a name. Of the few discussions I had with (Y/N), this one was the most difficult. We both had many ideas but could not agree on any.

“Spencer, you can’t give our little girl this name; she will hate us forever,” (Y/N) said, shaking her head in rejection.

“But my love, it’s a beautiful name. I wouldn’t like our little girl to have a traditional name. She’ll be more than a traditional baby,” I argued.

“Babe, I know. But let’s just try not to be so inventive. Let’s do it for her, okay?”. She insisted again, trying to make me see the reasons.

Finally, we reached an agreement that made us both happy. We hoped she would like it, too, and not hate us as she grows up. When we talked about it at the baby shower, everyone was happy with our decision. That day was unforgettable. Our families and friends reunited for our little girl. Our little girl. Oh God that sounds so good. She must have felt all that love. I’m sure she did because that day, she kicked (Y/N)’s belly like never before. At the end of the day, lying on the couch in our apartment with (Y/N), we were exhausted but happy with all the love we had received. We don’t feel anything, but lucky thanks to the people that rounded us. Even today, I cannot be more grateful. That night we talked a lot about how our new life would be like with our daughter. We talked and tried to imagine what she would be like, her features, her temper.

“She sure will have your nose.” (Y/N) told me.

“Why do you say that?” I asked, laughing.

“Because your nose is beautiful and I love it, therefore, it is fair our daughter inherits it,” (Y/N) said with utter conviction.

“Okay. Well I think she’ll have your eyes,” I declared almost solemnly.

“Why my eyes?”. (Y/N) asked me curiously.

“Because your eyes reflect all the love that one can feel for another human being and because your eyes are kind and full of life. Because your eyes are what light up my life, and I can bet her eyes will light up our lives much more,” I said almost without blinking and barely breathing. I noticed how some tears rolled down her cheeks.

“Wow… you’ve never said something like that… and it’s true you have said very nice things to me, Dr. Reid,” she said, smiling. That night I showed (Y/N) how much I love her, and not just with words.

The following weeks were rough. (Y/N) was in her last phase of pregnancy and looked more tired. I don’t blame her. Our little girl was not making life easier for her. Also, I was away more days than I would have liked. I tried she wouldn’t be alone. Her mom and sister were near to her the days I couldn’t be. When I came home one of those days, I noticed her relieved face when he saw me.

“It’s nice you’ve shown up tonight. I already believed I was going to give birth without you,” (Y/N) said to me in a tired voice and sitting on the couch fighting for a comfortable posture.

“What? now?…” I asked, stunned. She started to laugh but had to stop because it was additional exhaustion for her body.

“No, not now. But believe me, this afternoon I thought it would happen…” she said with a grimace.

“Okay. I think the trips are over for now,” I stated as I called Emily to request prenatal leave. Birth could happen at any minute.

Those days I was home with (Y/N), I tried to make up for all my absences, for every day she had to take care of our daughter in her womb without me being present. I was the first one waking up to make breakfast. We cook together. I spent whole afternoons reading books to both of them. Without a doubt, that was my favorite panorama. I know (Y/N) also enjoyed it; we always did that on the days we had off.

It was early morning. I felt (Y/N) moving in bed. I could tell she was uncomfortable. My sense of alert flared, and I sat up in bed. I saw the pain on her face. I asked her what was going on. She told me it seemed like it was time; birth could occur at any minute.

After being paralyzed for a second, I got up quickly and got dressed. I helped (Y/N) dress lightly and wrapped her in a blanket. Then I took the bag we had prepared from days before, and we left, heading to the hospital.

I could tell (Y/N) was in pain. She was looking at me, trying to regulate her breathing. I told her we were close, to hold on a little longer. It broke my heart to see her like this. At that moment, I would have given everything to be the one who was feeling pain and not her. Our daughter was about to come into this world, and she was wreaking havoc on her mother. It caused a big contradiction in my head.

We arrived at the hospital, and they quickly set (Y/N) in a stretcher. They had her medical records and knew she was in her 37th week. Nurses began preparing her for birth. I also prepared myself. I remember calling (Y/N)’s sister and JJ, asking them to let know the rest of our families and friends. Nurses told me to wait outside a room while they prepared (Y/N).

Time seemed like an eternity. I began to pace a little uneasily until a nurse left the room after 37 minutes and almost 40 seconds. I hastened to speak to her.

“Can I come in now?” I asked anxiously.

“Mr. Reid. You cannot come in for now. We’ll have to do an emergency c-section. For some reason, we don’t know yet, she is bleeding a lot, and we have to confirm she and baby are doing okay.” At some point, I had stopped listening to what the nurse was saying to me. I wasn’t even able to correct the fact she told Mr. Reid instead of Dr. Reid. This was not how it was supposed to be.

“But they… are they okay?” I asked with more fear.

“We are monitoring their condition all the time. Now we’ll take her to the OR. Please, I’m going to ask you to wait in the other room until we have news.” Without saying a word, I nodded. I took off the hospital gown and sat in the waiting room to wait. I was just waiting.

I forgot I called (Y/N)’s sister. She appeared next to her mom. Then JJ came with Emily. Their faces were excited and anxious but changed when they saw me sitting in the waiting room.

“Spencer? Why aren’t you with (Y/N)?” her sister, Steph, asked me. I could only look at Emily and JJ, who immediately suspected something was not going as expected.

“They are doing a c-section now. She won’t have a natural birth”. I said, trying not to alarm anyone. Trying to convince me it was a matter of time to see both my beloved girls. I don’t know if my explanation made them quieter, but they didn’t ask me any more questions. They sat next to me, same as JJ and Emily, who made some calls. I figured the rest of the team was on their way.

The minutes became hours: precisely 2 hours and 12 minutes. A doctor came out of the hallway of one of the ORs and approached where we were.

“(Y/N) Reid’s family?” He asked. I got up immediately.

“I’m her husband,” I said with a trembling voice.

“Mr. Reid. I know your wife came here with a full-term pregnancy and was expected to be a natural birth. Unfortunately, after the water broke, a sudden infection caused significant bleeding, a risk for the baby. After a c-section, we managed to get your daughter born, and she is in perfect condition.” My daughter was born, and she was okay. A sigh left my body.

“And how is my wife? Can I see her?” I asked quickly. The doctor’s face suddenly darkened.

“Your wife is fighting right now. Her body has not reacted so well to the medications, and although we managed to stop the bleeding, her levels have not rebounded in the last hour. Believe me; we are doing everything we can to make her body react to treatment…”. In the distance, I felt how (Y/N)’s mother vanished while Luke tried to hold her. (Y/N)’s sister began to cry, and JJ sought to hug her. I just felt Emily’s hand on my shoulder. I couldn’t react. Fighting? But if everything was just fine. Our daughter was born. She also had to be fine.

“Is she… conscious…? Can I see her…?” I asked automatically.

“Yes. You can see her. You can see your daughter too.” I nodded. The first stop was in the room where my little girl was wrapped and surrounded by nurses who monitored her condition. With a bit of fear, I approached her. My hands were shaking. My heart was pounding. When my eyes saw that small lump moving restlessly, my heart swelled, and I felt an uncontrollable urge to hold her and try to calm her down. One of the nurses took her off the crib and handed her to me. So I could have my baby in my arms. With a smile and all the tenderness the universe could provide, I spoke to calm her down.

“Hey, my little girl. It’s me, your daddy. Sure you’ve heard me before. Yes, I’m the moron who has bored you for months, reading stories to you. That´s right, my little girl. You are everything your mom and I had been waiting for. For so long, you know? You are so perfect, my little girl…”. As I spoke to her, she calmed down. She was no longer moving uncomfortably. For a few seconds, she opened her tiny eyes, and I swear I saw (Y/N)’s eyes in them, a fraction of them at least.

With tears in my eyes, I was only able to return a smile. Fool of me, surely she couldn’t see that. I knew what I have to do next. Very gently, I put my daughter in the hospital crib and went to see (Y/N).

I watched in horror as she lay in the hospital bed connected to tubes and machines. I slowly approached and held her hand, the one without the needles stuck in it. Finally, she was conscious and turned her head to see me.

“Hey,” I said, trying to smile. She smiled back at me. Even in that condition, she kept smiling at me. She wanted to speak, but I tried not to. “No, my love, don’t speak. You just have to keep fighting, okay?“. As expected, she paid little attention to me.

“Did you see our girl? How is she?” She asked me and squeezed my hand.

“Yes, I did. She is doing great. She is so beautiful…” I said, unable to stop the tears from coming out.

“Isn’t she?… I knew she would have your nose,” she mumbled, trying to joke. That also made me laugh.

“And she has your eyes,” I added, remembering our conversation from weeks before.

“Spencer… you can’t to know that… she’s… she’s very tiny yet…” she tried to refute.

“I’m positive. She opened her eyes being in my arms. They are a little piece of yours. I swear”. Tears began to flow from her eyes.

“I’m sorry…” she murmured.

“No, my love, don’t say that. You don’t have to think about it. You just have to recover. We have to go home with our little girl.” I spoke, trying to cheer her up. And cheer me up. I was looking for hope, trying to believe that everything would be fine.

“It’s what I want most in this world,” she said in a whisper.

“See? Then you must go on, my love. To keep fighting. I’m right here by your side.”

“Spencer. I’m scared,” she cut me off in an almost inaudible voice. It was true. I could feel it.

“I know. That’s why I’m here with you.” A little silence filled the room.

“Please… tell her how we met. Tell her how much we loved each other,” she pleaded as tears ran down her eyes. I couldn’t bear to see her like this. Not like this.

“You can do it yourself, my love. I don’t have to do it alone if you’re with me.” I don’t know how it was possible to say words with my broken voice. But they came out. They just came out.

“Tell her that mommy will love her forever, even if mommy is not here. I’ll make sure to take care of both of you, okay?” She was trying to contain the tears, but her voice cracked.

“No… no… don’t…”. I started shaking my head, looking at the floor. No, this was not happening.

“Spencer. Please, look at me.” I knew I had to, but I knew what it meant. “You’ll be an exceptional father. I do not doubt it. Please be happy. Help our little girl to fulfill her dreams and be happy too. And you, my love, try to find your happiness…” she mumbled in an increasingly tired voice.

“But I already have my happiness. With you…”. I tried to refute, praying to anything to keep her with me.

“Sometimes plans have to change,” she said with a shy smile.

“Not these, my love. I don’t want to change these.” I kept trying to avoid the unavoidable.

“I love you. I’ve always loved you. That’ll never change. I was so happy with you,” she said to me as more tears ran down her cheeks.

“I love you too. I love you more than anything in this life. Please don’t leave me. Stay with me.” My voice was a prayer. A useless prayer.

“Don’t lie. Now you have another girl in your life. You’ll love her as much as me,” she said, giving me her last smile.

When I left the room, I could only hear in my head the beep sound of the machine warning her life had gone out. I was devastated. I don’t know how I was able to get to the waiting room where everyone was. I also don’t remember how I almost fell to the floor. My legs failed me. In the distance, I felt cries, hugs of condolence, words of reassurance. When I became aware of what was happening, next to me were Emily and David. Silent. That awkward but necessary silence. They didn´t know what to tell me. I also didn’t know what to say to them.

Negation? Yes. I locked myself in my apartment for five days and 14 hours after (Y/N)’s funerals. For five days and 14 hours, I dropped into my pain. Neither the screams of (Y/N)’s sister blaming me for what had happened made me move. Nor JJ’s words through the door, nor Penelope’s baskets, nor the calls of Emily or David managed to get me out of the inertia of those five days and 14 hours. I was also unable to see my daughter. Already discharged from the hospital, (Y/N)’s mother took her to their home. I had lost everything. Did anything else matter? No, not to me. Nothing. Never. Again.

I have some gaps from those days. I know I spent some of those days drunk, sitting, and hitting my head against the wall—the rest of my memories: crying and screaming. I didn’t even go to the shower. I hardly entered the bedroom because everything there reminded me of (Y/N). Her scent was there. Her clothes were there. Our pictures. Our books. And a deafening silence.

After those five days and 14 hours, I was on the floor watching the clock and how the minutes moved forward. Then I heard a cry on the other side of the door. My sense of alert returned from one moment to the next. I got up from the floor and opened the door. I looked down, and there was a baby chair with a crying baby girl inside: my little girl. There was no one else with her. I glanced both ways down the hall, and I didn’t see anyone.

I saw a handwritten note over the blanket that was wrapping her: ‘Daddy, I need you.’ I froze. My daughter was asking for my help.

Not knowing much what to do, I just managed to pick the chair with my daughter inside. I left it on the dining table, watching how she cried. I remembered the first and only time I had held her in my arms. I tried to replicate the same.

I pulled her out of the chair with trembling hands and started pacing with her in my arms around the living room. Maybe that could help to calm her down. Partly it worked, but then she started crying again.

I called (Y/N)’s mom, waiting for her answer, but I got nothing. Then I called (Y/N)’s sister. She didn’t answer either. I called JJ, who didn’t answer. I tried with Emily and David without luck.

It was only my little girl and me. And (Y/N) who started talking to me in my head. Telling me she trusted me, telling me I would be a good father, that I would do everything necessary for our daughter’s well-being. And I had already failed miserably. It had been five days and 14 hours failing her.

My head started going through all the books I read about babies, all the podcasts I listened to, all the conversations with (Y/N) about what would be best for our daughter.

Instinctively I took her to the nursery we arranged with (Y/N) before her arrival. I checked the drawers and started checking the baby’s clothes. I pulled out a bag of diapers. Yes, her scent was evidence she needed a diaper change. When I finished it, I searched through the things on the baby chair where she was when I found her, and there was a bottle of warm milk. While I was walking with her in my arms, I gave her the bottle, and she drank it with great need.

Even stunned by the situation, I didn’t know much more to do than walk with her in my arms as I watched her fall asleep. And that’s how I understood it. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what to do. It only took five days and a bit more than 14 hours for me.

While I was watching my little girl sleep in her crib, my cell phone started to vibrate. It was JJ who was calling. I moved out of the room, leaving the door ajar to answer the call in the hallway. I didn’t want to wake her up.

“How are you doing?” JJ asked.

“Did you know about this?” I asked back. Although it was evident, she knew what was happening.

“Yes, we thought it was time to bring you back. She needs you, Spence,” JJ said to me with a soft motherly voice.

“JJ, I don’t know if I’ll be able… I can’t do it without (Y/N),” I replied, almost crying.

“I’m sure she would disagree. And I’m sure she told you that too,” JJ replicated.

“Yes. She told me. But I’m not ready,” I mumbled with my broken voice.

“Spencer, nobody is totally ready for something like this. And it would happen with (Y/N) or without her here.” Yes, maybe JJ was right.

“How do I start?” That was a question for myself rather than JJ; however, she answered it anyway.

“We are going to help you. We are your family, after all.” She said, trying to reassure me.

“What about (Y/N)’s mother and sister?” I interrupted, realizing my little girl had spent her first days with them.

“They agreed with this. It is what (Y/N) would have wanted, and they want to honor her memory and her wishes,” JJ assured me. “With Emily, we’ll visit you now. We have the bottles you should use in the afternoon and tonight. Then we’ll go to the grocery store and clean the apartment - which I bet is a disaster right now. That way you’ll spend the first night with your daughter. See you later, Spence,” JJ said before hanging up the phone.

I returned to the nursery, where my little girl had started to squirm and was moving uncomfortably in her crib. I took her in my arms and sat in the rocking chair. I began to sway to soothe her with the movement. She opened her eyes and looked at me. And yes, it was (Y/N)’s eyes. There was no doubt about it. I could have sworn she stared at me like her mom the first time I dared speak to her.

Then, in a soft voice, I started to speak.

“I think it’s time for daddy to tell you a new story, my little girl. The story of how you came to this world.”

——————–

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds

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more-quiverfull-sims · 4 years ago

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Gorman Family Updates!!!

Author’s note: my husband told me today that Stetson and Ingrid look like siblings, which made me laugh since a lot of fundie couples get the same comment. Ingrid is not very familiar with diversity, and is clearly disturbed by her brother’s decision to marry Ruthie Park! Ruthie’s family is Episcopalian, and both her parents work. Ruthie is also a pretty accomplished skier, not to mention an aspiring physicist. Oh, and we can’t forget that Ruthie’s older sister, Midori, married Stetson’s only brother, Finley--and that she was pregnant at the wedding! Ingrid is still not over that, and Carolina is two now.

Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this blog! I finished up with finals this week, so I have some time on my hands. This has been so fun so far!

Well! Goodness knows that it has been HECTIC for our family lately. I delivered our second blessing, Josiah...and then just a few months later found out that I was pregnant with a GIRL, sweet Hope Geraldine Gorman! She is our first girl and was born just thirteen months after Josiah. She is just so PRECIOUS and loves all things pink!

Unfortunately, I had to go to the hospital during my birth with Hope. I was grieved at first, but soon realized that the Lord was using this as a chance to humble me. I mean, I had JUST turned twenty-three and already had three sweet blessings! I was filled to the brim with pride and the Lord needed to humble me! I am so grateful for the emergency c-section I endured because it brought us closer together as a family.

Despite everything, Hope was just the most PRECIOUS thing ever!!! I was able to breastfeed her right away, too! Recovering from surgery is no excuse, ladies!

Stetson and I have fallen into a great routine with our babies. We go to church with Mama and Daddy every Sunday! Oh, and Mama had her tenth baby, sweet Noah, by the way! She’s 43 now and there hasn’t been another blessing yet!

But, as for us...I’M EXPECTING!!! I CANNOT wait to welcome our FOURTH little one and our THIRD son to the family!!! Our babies are so excited, too. They just LOVE being part of a big family.

Oh, and TWO of my brothers got married recently. Thaddeus married Chelsie. Chelsie’s grandaddy is a pastor who works on the ground winning souls in San Myshuno! They shared their FIRST kiss for the altar and now they are expecting!! We are SO overjoyed that our babies will have a sweet cousin to play with. What a blessing!

Also, Nathaniel got married to Ruthie. Ruthie is only eighteen and Nathaniel is nineteen. I have to say I was astonished. Ruthie was even younger than me when she got married! But Ruthie says she wanted to get married before she heads off to college for a “distinguished” degree in physics. (Physics! I told her she would be the only girl in the department and that it was just not modest! Ruthie said there were plenty of other women and the department, and that she isn’t worried about modesty...Imagine my shock at THAT!) And Nathaniel informed us that he is going to Foxbury, too...to study a distinguished degree in biology! He says he wants to be a doctor...Lord save him. I can’t image going through so many years of education in a SECULAR place like that!!

Here is an engagement photo that my mother sent me. It looks a bit intimate for me, but I’m glad they’re happy!

You’ll notice that my SWEET sister Brenna, the musician, was a flower girl at the wedding. I was so shocked since she was so SHY when Stetson and I got married. She insisted she didn’t want to be a flower girl at all! I am SO glad she is growing out of her shyness, as it is just NOT becoming of a young lady.

At the end of the ceremony, Brenna even joked that she wanted Nathaniel and Ruthie to adopt her! She is so silly!

Well, I didn’t know what to say about all of that, so I stopped by their place and tried to give Ruthie a talk about her wifely duties, and discussed birth control with her. I reminded her that it has terrible effects on Mama and baby!!! Ruthie just laughed and told me that they are adopting a dog. Oh, my heart was so grieved for Ruthie!! And Nathaniel...he’s been in love with Ruthie since they were children. I was always confused why my father accepted the friendship, but I know his wisdom is greater than mine!

I did stop by again to talk to Ruthie more about the joys of motherhood. The poor girl showed up to the door in this tiny little skirt! She said she had too much going on with school to worry about a baby yet...and Nathaniel agreed! He told me it might be hard for me to understand Ruthie because I don’t have a lot of “life experience.” Well!! I had no idea what to say to THAT! I reminded him that I will have my fourth baby just before my twenty-fifth birthday, but he just chuckled! Well, dear reader, I will be sure to pray for him!

I will be praying for Ruthie as well, as she is apparently still attached to the skiing habit she picked up in childhood. This is what happens when young ladies aren’t drilled in modesty, my friends! And don’t worry about me saying this on the blog...Ruthie knows how I feel! She said we can be friends just the same! I just pray I can lead her to righteousness!

And yes, for those asking, Ruthie’s father is Aaron Park, the famous author. I have never read one of his books, as I heard they can be a bit...salacious for my taste. Aaron and Ivy, Ruthie’s parents, gave them a nice house in Brindleton Bay as a wedding present. Personally, I could never accept such a gift! I am happy for them, but as a woman I would want my husband to EARN a home for us! Stetson is already doing a GREAT job as a science teacher at a nearby Christian school. I am so grateful!!

Here are the latest pictures of our sweet family. We are SO beyond blessed. There are such rewards in being faithful to the Lord!

Pray for a safe home delivery for our fourth little blessing, Isaiah Stetson Gorman!!

#thegormans #fundiesims #sims 4 #quiverfull #quiverfull sims

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openheartchoices · 5 years ago

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Deep Breath (Ethan Ramsey x MC)

Deep Breath

Open Heart: Ethan Ramsey x f!MC (Olivia Summers)

Words: 2.4k

Warnings: none except a little bit of a breakdown.

Summary: Olivia is having a terrible day that gets even worse at the end of her shift when she gets stuck in the elevator with Ethan.

A/N: starting a taglist, so let me know if you’d like to be added! lots of love and happy reading! <3

To say that Olivia Summers was having the worst day of her life was not an exaggeration.

It all started when Olivia woke up late after only getting an hour of sleep. She couldn’t find her white coat and when she did, she found that she had forgotten to throw it in the laundry to be cleaned and saw chicken broth stains where a patient had accidentally spilled it all over her.

She barely even had time to brush her teeth, much less her hair, so she hastily threw it up in an attempt to save time, but it looked like a bird’s nest. When she had finally gotten outside her boyfriend’s apartment, she realized she left her phone, so back inside she went. She was already late, but now she was extra late.

When Olivia had finally gotten to the hospital even more than extra late because of traffic, Esme had done everything she told her not to do which resulted in her mixing up two of her patients’ medicines. Usually, she wouldn’t have yelled because it wasn’t in her nature, but Olivia had been so fed up that she yelled at her before she could even think twice about it.

A few hours into her shift, a very rude patient started to demand to know when he was finally going to get taken down for his MRI scan. Olivia told him many times that it wouldn’t it be too much longer to which the patient started saying that Edenbrook only cared about money, not their patients, and that he should’ve just went to Mass Kenmore.

She tried to get some sleep in the on-call room, but two interns kept running in and out of the room every five minutes, so she just decided to quit trying. The poor girl was running on hardly any sleep. She was truly exhausted, and she still had four hours left until her shift was over.

Around four that afternoon, another intern came running into her near the nurse’s station, spilling a whole cup of hot coffee all over her, staining her coat even further and also staining her emerald green dress she wore under it. She was so fuming mad that she didn’t even notice the intern scurry off. Had the intern not ran away, Olivia would’ve yelled so loud the whole floor could’ve heard it.

Olivia’s day definitely proved to be the worst when two of her patients died that she had grown extremely close to. One was Sylvia Spencer who had been in a terrible car accident that caused her husband to die and caused her to have an emergency C-section. Despite everything, Sylvia was always positive. Even as Olivia held her hand as she died, she was positive. She was positive even when there was a newborn baby upstairs in the NICU she would be leaving behind as an orphan. Olivia kept strong and didn’t cry.

The next patient’s death hit Olivia hard.

It was a little girl who was only eleven-years-old named Bella. She loved to play basketball, go shopping, and was looking forward to going into the seventh grade until it was discovered that she had a rare and aggressive form of brain cancer. Bella was always extremely strong, never letting anyone see her cry.

Olivia truly believed she was going to beat it even with the low survival rate. Bella was a fighter, and Olivia had been there for two months to watch her be strong, so she knew she was capable. However, the cancer was tough. Bella and all the doctors fought it off as much as they could, but it had become obvious the cancer was going to win.

When Olivia walked into her room just to talk to her and see how she was doing, she stopped in her tracks to see the empty hospital bed. She knew exactly what had happened when the nurse who was in there gave Olivia a sad smile.

Bella had passed away, and she didn’t even get to say goodbye.

The rest of her terrible day was spent doing her rounds and walking around like a zombie. Olivia could hear some of the nurses talking about her and how she needed a shower and sleep, but Olivia paid no mind to it. She just wanted to get the day over with.

When the clock struck seven, finally, Olivia was on her way to the elevator to go home, and she realized she had never wanted to go home so much in her entire life. She pressed the button to take her down, hoping that it would come soon.

The elevator door finally opened, and Olivia stepped aside to let out the two doctors and the nurse that was on it. To her luck, there was no one else on the elevator meaning she could just have a moment of silence. But when the doors started to shut, a hand stuck in between them that forced them to open all the way back up.

Ethan Ramsey stepped into the elevator. On a regular day, Olivia would be excited to see her boyfriend of a year, but she couldn’t even muster up enough energy to make simple eye contact with him. He noticed he was going to the same floor as Olivia, so he only pressed the button for the doors to shut, glancing over at Olivia and frowning as the elevator started to move.

Ethan noticed all the stains on her dress and her white coat. He saw her hair that was in somewhat of a ponytail, but had fallen down, and Olivia obviously hadn’t taken the time to fix it. She was concentrating on the ground and not saying a word with her arms crossed. The bags under her eyes were noticeable, and she looked like she was going to either scream or cry at any given moment.

He opened his mouth to say something to her until they stopped going down abruptly, causing them both to stumble. They confusedly looked at each other for a minute before Ethan pressed the first floor button a few times realizing quickly that it didn’t work because the elevator had stopped. He held in the red emergency button, but nothing happened.

“Why did it stop?” Olivia asked, speaking to Ethan for the first time since the previous night.

“I think we’re stuck.”

“Stuck? For how long?”

With his hands in a surrender position, Ethan replied, “I don’t know. I’m not the maintenance guy.”

Olivia, in a fit of rage, marched over to the buttons and harshly pressed the first floor. She did it again, and again, and again, but the elevator never moved.

“What is wrong with this stupid thing?” She said aloud to herself. She started to repeatedly hit the button quickly with a lot of force. “Go! Why won’t you work?”

Ethan watched as Olivia took her whole fist and beat on the buttons, screaming and begging the elevator to work. His eyes widened and he pulled her away from the buttons in an attempt to keep her from doing something that would make their situation even worse.

She felt herself being pulled away from the buttons. “Get off of me, Ethan! Get off of me now! Leave me alone!”

Olivia tried to fight Ethan off of her. She hit at his arms that were wrapped tightly around her. Her cries were louder than the soft words he was whispering to her as he tried to calm her down. She eventually gave up, tears finally springing from her eyes for the first that day.

She couldn’t help the sobs that escaped her mouth as her knees gave out on her. The blonde felt Ethan help her down to the elevator floor, his arms never leaving her midsection. Olivia was gasping for air at this point, frantic tears still leaving her eyes.

Olivia cried for herself. She cried for Sylvia, and she cried for Bella. She cried for the terrible day she’d had, and she cried for all the exhaustion that had built up inside of her. The young doctor was definitely not okay.

“Olivia, hey,” Ethan said softly as he turned her around to look at him. “It’s okay, sweetheart. Look at me.”

Putting both hands on the sides of her face, Ethan guided his girlfriend’s head up to look at him. The hurt on her face broke his heart. She gripped his hands that were on her face, their eyes never parting. “Take a deep breath. Do it with me.”

Olivia followed after Ethan, trying to regain control of herself. She was starting to feel better as her and Ethan breathed deeply together. Once she had finally calmed down, she sniffled. “I’m sorry.”

He smiled at her, his thumb wiping away a stray tear. “What happened?”

She let out a strangled breath. “I’ve just had a terrible day. I couldn’t sleep at all last night. I got about an hour of sleep after a twelve hour shift. I forgot to throw my coat into the laundry, so it has chicken broth stains on it which is a whole different story for a whole different time. My hair looks terrible, an intern spilled coffee all over me, I couldn’t get any sleep in the on-call room, my intern mixed up two patients’ medicines, and two of my patients died. I just don’t know if I can handle this anymore. It feels like every time I take a step forward, I go ten steps back.”

Ethan held the girl close to him, pulling her into his lap as she latched onto him, one hand around his neck and the other fiddling with the buttons on his blue dress shirt. She was still sniffling, but the tears had stopped for the most part.

“There’s a baby in the NICU right now that’s an orphan. She’s not even a month old, and she’s already an orphan. Her mom died today. The same one who was in that terrible car accident and lost her husband. She died today, and she knew she was going to die. I couldn’t save her.”

Ethan frowned as Olivia kept talking. “And then Bella died-“

“Bella died?” Ethan asked in shock.

He didn’t know the young girl as well as Olivia did, but he had done check-ups on her once or twice. Ethan was very much aware of the bond that Olivia had with Bella, so he couldn’t even think of how bad she was hurting. He wished he could take her pain away, but he knew he couldn’t.

“Yeah,” she breathed out. “I didn’t even get to say goodbye, Ethan. She died, and I wasn’t there. I was there when she came in with her symptoms. I was there when she was diagnosed. I held her hand when she started losing her hair. Two months. That was all she got.”

Ethan’s hand came up take Olivia’s messy hair out of the ponytail. “It’s not your fault, sweetheart. You can’t blame yourself for every death. It happens. Yes, it sucks, and it’s one of the hardest parts of being a doctor, but you can’t beat yourself up over it.”

“I know. I… I just don’t know either. Their deaths are really messing with me.” She shuffled around for a minute to get closer if possible. “I just keep thinking about what if my daughter gets brain cancer, and I can’t save her. Or what if I die and she’s left all alone-“

“Hey, no, stop thinking about that kind of stuff,” Ethan cut her off. “I hate that you’re having a terrible day, but I don’t want you to think about that. Our daughter would always have someone. She would never be alone. You shouldn’t worry about that.”

Olivia and Ethan both froze when they realized the words that had just come out his mouth. With her face still puffy and eyes red, Olivia rose up to look at Ethan.

“Our daughter?” She asked quietly. “You want kids? With me? You’ve put thought into this?”

Ethan opened and closed his mouth a few times. He didn’t want to scare her off by saying the wrong thing. “I mean, yeah. I’ve thought about it.”

Olivia furrowed her brows. “I thought you didn’t want kids?”

“Well, I never really thought about it. I just never met anyone that I was serious about. I didn’t even think I’d meet anyone that I would consider marrying, much less having children with. But then you pushed your way into my life, and I started to think about it.”

Olivia didn’t know what to say. He really thought of marrying her and having kids with her? She took one look at his face that was filled with worry before breaking out into a grin. “Marriage?”

Flustered, Ethan said, “Eventually. If that’s what you want, too. You’re the one for me, Liv. There isn’t anyone else and there won’t be.”

Olivia was touched. In the year they had been dating, Ethan hadn’t been this open and real with her since he asked her to move in with him three months ago. She loved seeing him blush over her.

“That’s what I want, too,” Olivia whispered, unable to wipe the grin off her face. “I imagine us in a big house with a little girl who has your eyes running around and playing with Jenner in the backyard.”

Ethan broke out into a smile even bigger than Olivia’s. “She’d be just as loving as you. Even when you do have breakdowns in an elevator.”

Olivia pressed a kiss to her boyfriend’s lips before settling back onto his chest. A moment passed, and she felt her eyelids getting heavier as they waited on maintenance to finish fixing the elevator.

“I know you’re exhausted, Liv,” Ethan told her. “Get some rest. I’ll wake you up when we can get out.”

Sleepily, Olivia muttered, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

As she drifted off into the sleep that she desperately needed, Ethan’s fingers ran through her blonde, tangled locks and he looked down at her. With a smile, he reflected on what she had said; Jenner, a big house, a daughter, and a backyard. There was definitely a time when the doctor thought that he would never marry or have children, but Olivia had proved him wrong.

‘One day,’ he thought to himself.

---

- @kaavyaethanramsey

#ethan ramsey x mc #ethan ramsey #ethan ramsey x olivia summers #choices #choices stories you play #open heart #open heart 2 #choices app #open heart choices

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megalony · 5 years ago

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I do love you- Part 5

Another part of my latest series which I have gained some lovely feedback for.

Taglist: @marshmallowmae @langdonzvoid @mcrmarvelloki @butlegendsneverdie @jennyggggrrr @reedusteinrambles

Series masterlist

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Slowly moving his arm that was resting just above (Y/n)'s head, Roger rubbed at his eyes that were beginning to burn from being awake for over twenty-four hours now. His other arm was secured around (Y/n)'s waist, his hand resting on her stomach which he couldn't seem to comprehend would be for the last night. The doctors had said that it would be best to have the C-section now and it was all prepared to happen in the morning.

It was around three in the morning and Roger had gotten half an hour of sleep at most. He couldn't sleep from knowing what was happening in the morning, their fate was yet to be decided and Roger couldn't handle not knowing how everything was going to work out. He had done and said everything his mind could think of to try and convince himself and (Y/n) that they had chances of coming out of this alright. That their baby was going to be okay and (Y/n) would be fine but he couldn't promise that and they both knew it.

(Y/n) had managed a little more sleep than Roger but not very much. It had taken a while for Roger to finally calm her down enough to try and get her to lay down and go to sleep. Neither of them had moved for over two hours now, a silence enveloping them as they weren't sure when the other was actually asleep or just deep in thought. Roger couldn't find it in himself to move his hand from her stomach as if something would happen when he did. He wanted to feel some sort of connection to their child in case the worst did happen.

"You okay?"

Roger knew it was a stupid question the moment it passed through his lips when he felt (Y/n) stirring in front of him. Of course she wasn't going to be okay, they were faced with the prospect that they were going to have to take the risk of losing their baby.

Leaning over Roger pressed his lips to her shoulder, feeling her hand resting over his own on her stomach.

"I keep thinking we're at home. That this isn't happening to us." (Y/n)'s voice was but a whisper in the darkness of the room. A silent wish that was never destined to be granted. All she wanted was for the situation to be different, in these past few hours they had laid in a comfortable yet also uncomfortable silence (Y/n) had tried to imagine their situation was different. She came up with an alternative reality where they were back at her apartment. Laying so close they were almost moulded together, thinking over how their lives were going to change in the best possible way soon.

(Y/n) imagined that Roger was cradling her stomach like this because he was so excited to meet their baby, that he was thinking of what gender it would be and thinking of everything they would do together. When in reality she knew that wasn't happening. The drummer behind her wasn't thinking what gender their child would be because he didn't care. He wasn't excited to meet their baby because he knew as well as she did and more so that their baby shouldn't be born yet. He wasn't thinking of everything they would do together because the odds were stacked against them in the way that they were more likely to lose their baby than get to watch them grow up.

Roger was cradling her stomach because right now their child was alive and up to now was stable which might not be the case when they were born in just a few hours time. He was savouring the moments he could grasp in case everything turned out differently.

"I tried that... I think it just makes it worse darling. We don't know what direction the wind will blow in a few hours from now, we just need to take it as it comes." Roger couldn't try and fool himself into thinking that they were at home or that (Y/n) and their baby were fine. He couldn't imagine that they were at 37 weeks or more and that their baby was ready to be brought into the world because when he came back to reality the crash was much worse than anyone could imagine.

They didn't know what was going to happen in the very near future, they needed to be prepared for anything but at the same time keep a certain level of optimistic thoughts to try and get them through. There was nothing else they could do.

"Do you think this is karma?" Roger didn't miss how her voice trembled as she spoke the words. She couldn't help but wonder if this was payback for the wrongs that they had done. For Roger cheating on his wife, for (Y/n) being the other woman and allowing them to sleep together when they both knew they shouldn't. For them not realising their feelings for each other before now, knowing that now was too late for no damage to be done to anyone.

"I don't believe in that, superstition or religion. It tends to fuck people up. I think that there was nothing we could have done to prevent this or see it coming. You got a rare condition and you're not well, nothing you or I did warranted this to happen, the world doesn't work in mysterious ways and things don't happen for a reason. They just happen as they do." Roger hated how karma got to people like it was getting to (Y/n) now. People did things in the heat of the moment and spent the rest of their lives just waiting for something bad to happen to them because they felt they deserved it. Some people didn't even do anything wrong and still thought something bad was going to happen or did happen because they deserved it.

They had fallen in love, that wasn't wrong. They had gone behind Roger's wife's back and they shouldn't but at the same time when his marriage was on the rocks, it wasn't hurting anyone any more than when he would have had to tell her he couldn't be with her anymore. They wanted their child, it wasn't as if they had begged for this to happen. Things didn't happen for a reason or as payback for something else in your life, it wasn't a mysterious way of the world. No one could stop this from happening or see it before it happened, this was how their lives had gone and they were having to deal with this.

A small groan suddenly left (Y/n)'s lips before she burrowed her face into the pillow. Her knees pulled up to her stomach as Roger pressed himself further into her back to try and lean over her, the pair of them lying on their right sides. His anxiety spiking at wondering what was suddenly wrong.

Reaching out Roger turned on the light just as (Y/n) leaned over, her hands moving to grasp the cream coloured sick bucket before the contents of her stomach were unleashed. Feeling her hair gently being pulled behind her head for precaution as her eyes were almost closing. Her senses becoming drowsy from lack of sleep. When the sudden bout of sickness disappeared, (Y/n) placed the bucket back to the floor, her eyes falling closed as she tried to curl up on herself. Everything felt wrong, like all of her energy had been stolen and replaced with an unusual, unwell feeling. It wasn't exactly just feeling sick, it was as if she was running on last reserves like a car needing more fuel.

"W-what are you doing?" If this were any other time her eyes would have narrowed or even widened when she managed to crack her eyes open to see Roger pressing the emergency button. All she had done was throw up, it wasn't as if she was in crippling agony or throwing up blood. She felt herself close to falling asleep now anyway, couldn't he just let the silence wrap them up again?

"You've got jaundice in your eyes and you've thrown up. Your liver's failing." Roger managed to catch a glimpse of her eyes before she closed them, not being able to stay awake for much longer. He had noticed the tinge of yellow to the whites of her eyes which was from the toxins in her blood that her liver hadn't broken down like it should have. That and being sick was a sign that her liver was beginning to fail which was always an option when her liver count had risen to a drastic point. Leaving her liver to become overworked and suddenly fail like this.

They couldn't wait any longer for their baby to be brought into the world, they needed to be born now before anything happened to (Y/n) that could cause Roger to lose them both.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A tightening feeling appeared in Roger's stomach when (Y/n)'s eyes began to flutter like butterfly wings. Her mind starting to come back to consciousness which was both a relief and a worry to Roger.

Their baby had been born just over an hour ago by C-section and (Y/n) hadn't been able to stay awake any longer which Roger had been expecting. The medication coursing through her system, the tiredness which her illness was causing and the trauma had sent her to sleep. Roger was relieved she was finally getting some kind of sleep but at the same time, he wanted her to be awake so he could know if she was alright. She didn't look too well from where he was sitting and it was scaring him to no end.

"Hey, sweetheart." Roger's voice was hoarse as he gingerly reached out to brush a stray strand of hair behind her ear. His other hand entwined with her own as he tried to stop the tears from falling. Everything was burning, his body was on fire from having little energy running through his veins and not having the nerve or the opportunity to sleep. When their baby had been born Roger had run down the corridor after the midwife who snatched their child up and tried to disappear. He followed and watched from the window to make sure their baby was alive and being cared for before drifting back to (Y/n). Then he couldn't find the ability to sleep when she wasn't well and could wake up at any moment. He needed to be awake to talk to her and calm her down.

"T-the baby..." (Y/n) mumbled, her free hand slowly moving to press to her temple where her head felt like it was splitting at the seams. She didn't remember much to anything since the medication was pushed into her bloodstream. Her mind had been numbed down, she couldn't even remember being told if they'd had a boy or a girl.

"We've got a little boy, sweetheart. He's in the ICU." Forcing her head to turn to her left, (Y/n) locked her drowsy eyes onto Roger. His lips trying to pull upwards into a smile but he couldn't seem to manage it. He knew they weren't out of the woods yet, (Y/n)'s liver wasn't back to working order yet and even though their boy was alive it didn't mean he was okay. They didn't know if any of his organs were under-developed if he had anything wrong such as breathing difficulties or anything wrong with his brain. All they knew was he was alive and right now that wasn't very much to go on.

"Is he okay?"

"I think they're running some tests... he's rather small." Roger couldn't give a straight answer to that because there wasn't one to give. He had only seen his son for a little while, the nurses had fussed over him too much for Roger to be able to watch over him. Only knowing they were getting ready to run some tests and straight away put him in an incubator trying to keep him warm as they tended to him. "How are you feeling?"

(Y/n) thought on the answer for a moment.

The sickness she had felt a few hours previous was no longer there, although she couldn't be sure whether that was because of whatever drugs they were medicating her with or because she really was getting better. Her head was woozy and starting to split open from everything that had been happening but that was nothing unusual or unexpected. (Y/n) couldn't tell if her liver was any worse, the same or maybe a little better so that was alright up to now, and her eyes were back to normal anyway so her vision was not a problem.

If she based her answer to the question on those things alone she would say she felt okay. That she was doing alright as far as it goes.

But she couldn't say that. (Y/n) couldn't say that she was fine because deep down she wasn't. There was an emptiness that felt like a void was taking over her system, starting in her abdomen. Something was clearly missing and it didn't take a genius to work out what that something was. (Y/n) was missing their little boy, she was without him now to save herself because she grew worse every day she tried to give him that little bit longer. She had evicted him to save herself and now she felt hollow without him. So how could she say that she was alright when she felt like this?

"Empty."

That one word broke the barrier that had been put up to stop Roger from shedding any more tears. Nothing came to mind for him to respond with to that broken response. He could tell (Y/n) that her liver count hadn't risen but so far hadn't lowered yet, or that her blood was no longer starting to breakdown according to the last blood test. He could tell her she should begin to feel better by the end of the day that hadn't long begun. None of that mattered when she felt like something had been stolen from her. How would knowing she wasn't getting any worse help when that didn't change the way she was feeling? Roger had no news for her that would enlighten her or alleviate her fears for their little boy because he didn't know anything.

"Can you go see him? I'm not going anywhere... please check on him." (Y/n) didn't like the thought of Roger sitting here with her when their boy was somewhere else in the hospital separated and alone. She wasn't going to go anywhere and it wasn't like she was in pain or needed consoling. She could just go to sleep or stare at the walls and wait for the medication to burn out in her system so she felt more awake than this. There was no point for Roger to stay here with her when he could be more use watching over their son and checking to know what was wrong with him.

"Alright. Try and sleep, I'll come back in a little while." Roger responded after a moment of pause. Gently unclasping his hand from her own as he pushed himself to shaking legs, leaning down to kiss her forehead before trailing out of the room.

Making his way down the corridor Roger turned left and then another left, his mind having the map of the hospital laid out and ready so he didn't have to squint to read the directions set up above doorways. His aching feet carrying him to the neonatal ICU, somewhere that before now Roger had never had the need to go to in the hospital. His head turning to the left to glance through the window of the room where his son and other newborns were being cared for. That same tightening he felt when (Y/n) was beginning to wake suddenly clenched at his stomach out of nowhere as he felt like all the air had been stolen from his lungs.

His head beginning to shake as a small, silent round of 'no' passed through his slightly parted lips when his eyes noticed there were two nurses fussing over one of the newborns. Roger wasn't forgetful, he had memorised where his son was in the room and he was right where the nurses were now meaning something was wrong.

"Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to wait outside please." A third nurse seemed to appear from thin air just as Roger took two strides into the room. The panic clearly written over every part of his face as he looked to the nurse blocking his path. Her hand resting on his arm to try and nudge him out of the room he was no longer allowed in for the time being. His head beginning to shake in disagreement as he rubbed furiously at his eyes to try a feeble attempt at stopping the waterworks.

"That's my boy. What's wrong with him, what are you doing?" Reaching his arm out Roger pointed over to the incubator that held his son, not even being able to catch one glimpse of his newborn for the nurses blocking him from sight.

"He stopped breathing on his own, we're having to put him on a ventilator to breathe for him."

Roger put up no fight when she guided him out of the room. He didn't feel anything when his legs decided they could no longer hold him up and allowed him to crash land to the polished floor. He couldn't hear her voice asking him if he was alright and trying to check what was wrong with him all of a sudden. Leaning forward Roger rested his head on his knees, his hands becoming lost in his tangled and knotted hair as he himself could no longer breathe either. Maybe he was going to lose his boy after all.

#roger taylor #roger taylor imagine #roger x reader #imagine #queen band #i do love you

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ponderingsofanewfather · 5 years ago

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Pondering The Before

My wife recently had to have a C-section at 33 weeks (7-ish months) into her pregnancy. A lot has happened since we first learned we were expecting, so I like to look back at the things I've done and wonder if I did them right.

WEEK NEGATIVE 1 -- PROLOGUE

We had a discussion regarding children. At that point in our lives, we had steady jobs, slowly increasing savings, and a lack of variety. Normal people might fix this by taking classes together or starting a new hobby, but we decided to try for a child. My wife seemed more open to the idea than I was, but that doesn't mean I was unwilling.

I might've been more open about my feelings, or lack thereof; I knew that I didn't feel as strongly as she did about potential children. Even so, this was going to be the next chapter of our lives, and then was the best time yet to start it.

WEEK 4 -- WHEN WE LEARNED

We learned that we were expecting early on. My wife's gynecologist confirmed via ultrasound that we had a budding embryo, due to be born in late September 2019. Looking back at our reactions, my wife was significantly more excited than I was. She was planning on telling our parents pretty soon and thinking about nursery designs, whereas I was making cold jokes about parasites and crushed dreams.

At this point in our marriage, my wife knows that I don't share my feelings very well, but I really should've been happier, or at least more supportive. When we're young, we're told that pregnancy is one of the most magical things that can happen; the least I might've done is act happy to learn of it.

WEEKS 8-20 -- DID YOU TAKE LATIN IN HIGH SCHOOL?

There's a pregnancy phenomenon known as hyperemesis gravidarum. It's a medical phrase meaning "holy crap, I feel like I need to vomit 24/7, and the baby inside of me is why". We were unlucky enough to encounter this for about 12 weeks. During that time, my wife couldn't keep down food with flavor more complex than plain chicken and mashed potato. Easy enough to cook, but hard to make nutritious enough for two (three if you count myself).

It was during this time that we had a miscarriage scare. After bending over, my wife felt a large surge of liquid, which turned out to be red and clotted. At first, I felt a bit disgusted at the notion of it (I don't handle bodily fluids well). A few minutes later, the reality set in; my own child might've lost her chance at life.

That's when it became more real for me. Despite the birth being many months away, despite not knowing the kid at all... I wanted her to live. She deserved to live, and we had no way of knowing if she would. Fortunately, the embryo was still there and alive, but we took a bit more care after that.

WEEKS 21-32 -- THE DARKNESS STIRS

With the intense nausea behind us, the embryo became a fetus and started moving. She started out very active, with numerous kicks and rolls and hiccups. It was honestly fun to hear about when she was moving and turning about, but even more fun to feel it for myself. It's a bit like feeling your uvula with your finger: at first, you're weirded out, but you can't help going back for more.

This time period was also when I said my first words to my daughter. We had heard that babies can hear through the walls of the uterus, so if you get close enough, they might be able to hear your voice. So, during one of the baby's particularly kicky dance routines, I decided to lean in close and whisper some loving words.

"Leave my wife alone, you little bitch."

Of course, I said it in jest. My wife knew that too, but that didn't stop her from hitting me on the shoulder. Nor did it stop the baby from practicing karate forms.

I learned then that jokes about pregnancy shouldn't be menacing. You might think it's all in good fun, but harsh words will evoke harsh responses, even if you don't mean them. I tried to be more lighthearted after that.

WEEK 33 -- THE PREECLAMPSIAN ERA

It still sounds like it might be one of the ages before mankind.

When we first saw the signs, we thought that maybe it wasn't so bad. It was just a bit of a headache and high blood pressure, no big deal. It'll go away.

It didn't, though.

My wife's feet began to swell next. We bought compression socks, hoping that they would help reduce her foot size a bit. They didn't.

Then her legs started swelling, too. One of the indicators of preeclampsia is called "pitting edema", which is where you can press into the legs and leave an indentation that stays. We could've played tic-tac-toe with the indentations that we left. I actually tried; my wife wasn't as amused as I was.

It was then that we tested her urine with a special testing strip. It detects all sorts of stats related to pregnancy using a series of colors; the one relevant to preeclampsia started yellow and became greener and darker with the presence of some kind of proteins. Her reading was blue.

I encouraged her to call her doctor at this point; something was clearly wrong. Her doctor encouraged her to go to the hospital. The hospital decided to put her through an emergency Cesarean section. Normally, they would want to do this at 34 weeks, but the preeclampsia was too severe.

I finally felt like I did something right. If she hadn't gone to the hospital here, we might've lost the baby, and then maybe I would've lost her. I followed her to the Labor and Delivery ward both proud and worried.

WEEK 33.5 -- SECURITY BREACH

The moments leading up to the surgery were... weird. Confidence mixed with dread. The chances of a complication were small, but still not zero. That's fine if a "complication" means losing a bet or taking more time, but when the stakes are as severe as two lives, even a tiny chance seems too large.

Our surgery was delayed due to an emergency c-section that came in before us. We had to wait another three hours before we could be transferred. This didn't really help us calm down, though. Stakes being too large and all that. We watched old reruns of Family Feud before we were wheeled to the operating theater.

While my wife was prepped for surgery, I had to get dressed in a white jumpsuit made of some itchy material. The suits went up to XXL size; they did not fit. I had to get a set of the doctors' operating gowns and booties. I'm told I looked ridiculous. I thought I looked more ridiculous than usual.

The surgery room itself was fairly calm. There are a lot of people moving about, and a lot of beeping instruments, but those somehow don't really bother you. I tried making a few jokes to my wife, but she didn't respond. Probably because of the epidural.

After 20 minutes of waiting and 10 minutes of operating, the room erupted in cheering - our daughter was out. She took about 20 seconds to start crying, but when she started, oh boy did she start. As my wife got repaired, I took pictures of the newly born baby. Everyone kept saying that my new daughter was beautiful. Even now, I respectfully disagree.

Thus marks the end of my childless life. Over this time, I've learned a lot about myself, most notably about my bad joking habit. For instance, I learned that an ultrasound is neither the time nor the place to note that the baby's face looks like something out of The Grudge, despite how true that might be. I also learned that reassuring your wife, who is worried that she looks like a beached whale, that that's "understandable" is the wrong way to go about it. Negativity and sarcasm are generally bad approaches to handling a pregnancy, despite how entertaining they are to me.

I know that I'll continue to learn and grow as the baby does. I always thought when I was a kid that grownups know how to do everything; now I just hope that I'll seem that way to my own.

#parenting #thoughts #lessons learned #there's a time and place for everything #pregnancy #holy shit i'm a parent

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redlenai · 3 years ago

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I almost lost my mom due to an Ectopic Pregnancy, as a 10 years old child I had to not only help her put on her bandages post-surgery, I also witnessed all the pain she went through, not only the emotional one, but the aftermatch of ALL that experience.

First of all, she almost didn’t come back, I wasn’t home when that happened and her partner back then FOUND HER on the ground on our house, barely breathing from the pain and blood lose. He took her to a hospital immediatly but if he found her later, she may have not survived.

Doctors did an emergency surgery on her, massive blood loss, they had to repair and suture as much as possible on her body, they tried to do a lot of cleaning as well because of the internal bleeding.

She came back home with a C-Section, very painful, she had to wear not only the stitches, bandages but even a binder that had to be reeplaced since it was a cheap one and eventually got loose. She couldn’t lay down, she couldn’t sit, she could barely walk but any kind of position was painful, even with medication.

The doctors derivated her to Therapy as well, to accept and assimilate the fact that she lost a child, because for her she lost a child, not a zygote. Her emotional distress was valid, and the doctors recognized it as well and I believe that in certain cases not everyone is told to do Therapy to mourn their lose, to understand they got their anticipation crushed. She was ready to have a baby and is plain awful getting prepared for that to... come home without a child.

It was like that for almost an entire year, and on top of that, all alone. Her partner had to work, he was a cop and with her state he decided to work more hours for the sake of having enough money for medicine, any kind of accident, urgency or whatever, when he was home he was attentive and supportive. She and I were in a rural city, no family nearby, even more, they never came to visit during that period of time. Thankfully my school was 5 blocks away so I could walk, and I always went late to school then came back earlier just for the sake of knowing my mom was fine.

She and her partner broke up later, and then we came back to our city. She kind of overcame her horrible experience, but there was something else within her body. Every time she had her period, she had horrible and very violent pain, her belly would get swollen and inflamated, it didn’t matter if she took a pill or used all the methods that we women have known related to menstrual pain for ages.

It took around another 5 years before a doctor came and told us:

“Due to how complicated the emergency surgery was and how advanced the ectopic pregnancy was, doctors have tried their best to clean up your body, but it seems that as your body healed there is blood tissue that forms now within your period and as it stretches and it stuck to your organs, that’s what’s causing you pain and inflamation. However, as you may believe, you’ll think this is endometriosis, but it’s not, therefore, there isn’t a specific medicine to help you out. And performing another surgery to separate your internal organs is too risky”

I remember her, two weeks before her period, dealing with back pain, dealing with her abdomen swelling and hurting, sometimes it would even trigger an urinary infection, there were times she was throwing up or calling her job to notify she had a “stomach infection with dehydration“ (Because if you said it was because of your period, people would think you were making excuses!)

And I think the worst was her third pregnancy, she was always anxious, always afraid she may lose her third child. The first stage of the pregnancy she was crying, on top of that the dad of the baby left and she was all alone again, especially after a family fight with her sister and everybody taking sides. During the second phase she began to relax, the baby was growing just fine, sometimes she’ll stress over because “She didn’t feel right that day therefore something must be going on with the baby”. I tried to distract her with series, movies, video-games and so many things, and thankfully, Max was born safely.

Nowadays her period isn’t as violent, she still has inflamation and pain a week before it starts, but it’s manageable and Max is a healthy 8 years old lil’ monster so everything is fine.

And in a side note, as she has my name and my brother’s name tattoed, she made the decision of dedicating a part of herself to this child she didn’t have and asked me to make the design in 2016.

Look at where you get your information. Make sure it’s reliable. Stop causing more pain to people already in a rough place.

#red rambles

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tinywriter2018 · 6 years ago

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Chapter 2 - Daydramin’

Word Count: 1744

There was light streaming down into her face. Sakura knew that couldn't be possible counting she had blinds that she never opens, yet here she was stirring because it was too bright. Turning over, so slowly opens her eyes to see blue greyish sheets. She blinked confused. Her sheets were darker color, more purple than anything. Sitting up, she blinked back the pain as the drinks from the previous night came biting her in the ass. Her head pounded as she slowly began to remove herself from the strange bed. The room was too neat and tighty, definitely not Naruto’s.

Sakura looks around for her shoes, but she couldn’t seem to find them. She pulled on her bra straps, wondering how drunk she was in order to sleep in the uncomfortable bra. Sakura slowly began to walk out of the bedroom, trying to brush out her tangled hair.

“Good Morning.” She paused, her eyes grew wide as she looked at Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto’s friend.

“Morning.” She noticed the cup of coffee, waiting for her.

“The coffee should help with the hangover-” Sasuke paused as Sakura quickly downed the hot liquid, before giving him a shy nervous smile.

“Thank you, bye.” She quickly left, running to grab her shoes at the door. Sasuke went to follower her but by the time, she got out his door, he couldn’t help but smile, thinking how bright red her face had just gotten.

Ino came home from Sai’s place. Her dress from last night was still on, and she was carrying her heels. Walking into the main room, she sees Sakura spread out on the couch with Grey’s Anatomy playing on the TV.

“Sakura?” She asks. Sakura turns to her, her hair up in a bun. Her glasses sliding down her face, while a pint of Ice cream was in front of her along with a couple of folders from work. “Your watching Grey’s Anatomy?”

“Don’t judge!” Ino Dropped her stuff down, walking over to the women, in her lazy clothes.

“I’m not, it’s just...Sweety you hate Grey’s Anatomy. What happened?” Sakura sighed, slamming her face in her hands.

“I woke up in Sasuke’s bed.”

“What!?” Ino yelled, quickly jumping over the couch. “How!? Was it amazing!”

“Nothing happened! At least I don’t think it did. He was already up when I got up and I was still fully clothed, only minus my shoes.” She rubbed the back of her neck. “I didn’t think I had that much to drink.”

“Wait, isn’t he also working at the same hospital as you.”

“Shit, I forgot...Ino!” She yelled. Ino leaned in patting her shoulder.

“Can I give you some advice?”

“Please.” Sakura pushed her glasses up.

“Nothing happened it seems like it, which means that nothing has changed between you two. You are just new acquaintances that have to work together on monday. So I suggest you put it behind you, turn off the trashy bad medical advice show,-”

“I don’t like it, that doesn’t mean it’s trashy-” Sakura tried to speak again, but Ino held a finger to her lips.

“And take a shower. You smell like a walking bottle of Pink Champagne.” Sakura’s hand fell. She knew Ino was right. Nothing to get nervous about or wondering if she made a mistake about anything. Sasuke was being a nice guy and helped her when she was intoxicated. Ino took of her glasses and helped push her towards the bathroom. Taking a bite of ice cream for herself.

Sasuke was sitting in his apartment. Naruto had stopped by, a bag of bagels in his hand, like he always does after a night of partying. He sits and eats them all by himself, while Sasuke sips on his coffee.

“So, did Sakura get home alright?” Naruto asked, stuffing another everything bagel into his mouth. Sasuke paused, sipping on his coffee. Looking down at the table.

“She stayed here last night.” He took a sip of his coffee peering at his friends reddening face.

“Sasuke! How could you!? She’s my wife’s friend-She’s My Friend! I thought you weren’t playing with women anymore! You dumbass I told you not to-” Sasuke hold up his hand silencing his friend.

“She stayed over last night because I didn’t know where she lived. She had passed out by that point. The only person I could think of calling was you, but I knew you weren’t in a position to talk.” Naruto shook his head. “Nothing happened!” Sasuke yelled at his friend, grabbing a piece of bagel.

“Never stopped you from calling me before.” Naruto mumbled. Before Sasuke could respond, his phone began to ring. Looking at the ID, his brother’s name flashed on the screen. Toying with answering, he knew he would just keep calling until he did.

“Hello.” Sasuke spoke, hearing his brother sigh in relief on the other side.

“Sasuke, please we need to talk. Please think about where your doing your fellowship again. It’s not to late-”

“Today’s my first day, I would say it’s a little late.”

“Yes but baby brother-”

“I’m sorry big brother, but I won’t be doing my fellowship at that hospital. Goodbye.” Hanging up, he sipped in coffee in silence. Naruto had a feeling his friend needed cheering up. Quickly taking out his own phone, he sent a photo to Sasuke. The phone dinged on the table. Sasuke picked it up to see a photo sent to him. It was from last night at the club. Himself and Sakura were sitting very close together, a light smile on her lips, while he caught himself with a rare small smile on his own. Flashing a look to Naruto, his friend only winked at him.

“Cause I know you never got one in High school.” Rolling his eyes, Sasuke locked his phone, and leaving his friend to eat alone while he went to get ready for work.

Sakura was checking up on one of her patients in the NICU. The little boy was born 4 weeks premature, and was about to be able to be sent home to his mother. The nurses behind her were gossiping, as usual. They only did so, when there were no parents in the room.

“Did you hear about the new doctor?”

“The Hottie from that small village?”

“I heard he is the son of tycoon owner.”

“Really? I hope he takes notice to me!” She squealed. Rolling her eyes, Sakura smiled at the baby, handing her chart to another nurse. Walking out of the NICU, she was seen by her boss and mentor, Tsunade.

“Sakura!” She quickly froze, knowing what she was going to ask.

“I’m too busy.”

“No, your not. Just show him around, let him get to know the hospital.”

“I’m sure anyone else would be glad to do it.” She put out, but Tsunade shook her head.

“I trust you.” Sakura sighed, turning to look at her mentor.

“Fine. When?”

“He’s at the nurses desk in this ward, show him around after lunch.” Tsunade pointed the direction that he was. Sakura built up the courage, and went to find him.

Sakura and Sasuke weren’t sitting in the middle of the cafeteria but she still felt like all eyes were on them. He was seeming to ignore them quiet well. Sakura felt her knee begin to bounce, the eyes on her when she wasn’t in the OR, was not something she was used to. He seemed to be perfectly use to it. She felt the need to bring up her running out of his apartment in the morning but couldn’t find the words or the courage, not with everyone staring.

“Sasuke-”

“It’s fine. I’m not upset about anything.” He gave her a small title of his lips into what was she believed the closing thing to smile, she can remember but before she could respond her pager goes off.

“I have to go, one of my patient’s has an emergency.”

“You going in the OR?”

“Yeah.” she got up to leave, and he quickly followed.

“Can I watch?”

“It’s just a C-Section.”

“Still?”

“Alright, just from the Observation room, don’t like other surgeons telling me how to do my business.” Sasuke nodded.

“Something we have in common.”

Sasuke sat patiently, his eyes darting between the monitor and the room down below. Sakura’s pink hair was glowing under the lights.

“There we go!” She said happily, the mother calm behind the current. The baby crying loudly. “Welcome to the world, little man.” He felt himself smile at her tone. He noticed the nurses around her looking worried. She handed it to the nurse, knowing why. The baby was too small.

“Is my baby alright?” Sakura began to work on bring the mother’s stomach back together, clearing out the blood.

“He looks healthy at first glance, the nurse is with him. Just a little small, like we talked about.” She reassured her patent. C-Sections where hard for doctors, the others tended to be awake. Once everything was back where it should be, and stitched, Sakura turned to an attendant. “Stitch her up, and while I check on patient number 2.”

Sakura came out of the OR, removing her gown and cap. Sasuke was leaning against the wall, a cup of water in his hand. He reached out handing it to her. She thanked him, with a nod, downing it in one gulp.

“The baby is way to small. He’ll be in the NICU for at least a week or two minium.”

“But other than that he’s healthy?”

“Perfectly, his lungs are functioning normally, his liver is developed, nothing is wrong, just his size.”

“How early is?”

“Two weeks. She had trouble getting this one, so we made sure to keep an eye on her more closely.”

“That was a fast delivery.”

“Well it’s not my first one.” She refilled the water cup, downing another glass.

“Since your lunch was interrupted, do you want to go to dinner.” Sakura eyes him suspiciously. “I mean, I don’t know anyone around her, nor do I know any good places to eat.”

“You know Naruto.”

“Yes, but he is busy with the Hokage or his wife. So I am desperately in need of your assistance.”

“Fine, there's a Ramen Shop that’s open late enough and likes Doctors.”

“There are places that don’t like doctors?”

“You would be surprised. Bars love us though.”

“Really?”

“I’ll take you there after our shift. I still have rounds.”

“Deal.”

Pervious Chapter: Chapter 1

Next Chapter: Chapter 3 - Coming Soon

Masterlist

#naruto fanfiction #Sakura x Sasuke #Sasusaku #Sasuke #Sakura #tinywriter2018 #pink champagne

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thepilotanon · 6 years ago

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Prelude xii

...for a horrific malady {masterlist}

I’ve been super busy with a lot of outside work and life in general, so I hope you will enjoy this chapter and will let me know what you think! Your patience and support really means a lot to me.

warning: minor violence, depiction of death.

It was rare for someone to call Commander Kylo Ren through the commlink, requesting his presence immediately. Not even the General, Captain or Head Officers bothered to alert Kylo for anything else that wasn’t on his schedule and he happen to be one minute behind…

So, when the medical assistant from Starkiller Base’s medbay alerted him while he was officially closing the first section of the superweapon underground, seeing the section on his holopad, the young man didn’t waste another breath as he made his way back to his secluded quarters.

Inside the locked off hallway, Kylo found the remains of the medical droid implanted into the solid wall and the medical assistant keeping distance from Nova, who was huddled in a corner farthest away. His visors only seeing her standing stiff, her arms wrapped tightly around herself, Kylo’s helmet head snapped sharply to the male assistant. The poor creature jumped with fear as the Commander marched right up to him and shoved him against the wall, leather gloves fisting the medical uniform as he stared down to the other. Tears were emerging in his wide eyes and his knees rattled, and Kylo wouldn’t doubt that the nurse would be so close to pissing himself.

“What happened here?” Kylo seethed darkly, lifting the man to his toes by his shirt.

The nurse swallowed thickly, trying to speak. “I-I was r-r-requested b-by the d-droid to c-c-come and...h-help w-with…” The man began hyperventilating, and Kylo eventually dropped him before shooting his hand towards the other’s head. Peeling the frightened man’s mind apart, ignoring his cry, Kylo collected the images and voices of what led up to the situation now.

He found the nurse using the emergency code to enter the hallway to find Nova arguing with the medical droid who was holding out the pill container. Nova told the man that she didn’t need the sleeping pill, claiming that she was tired enough to sleep on her own, and how the droid was refusing to leave her alone. As the nurse was calmly trying to assist, the droid made a move with its other robotic hand to grab Nova’s throat, claiming how she must take the medicine -

A snap from Nova using the Force out of fear from the threatening touch, the droid was shoved halfway through the wall and the nurse fell back in terror. Realizing what she had done, Nova demanded that the nurse called for Kylo. She wasn’t mad or threatening to the nurse, no, but she was a bit surprised by her sudden actions bringing back negative memories. Kylo knew this, and it still didn’t deter his anger about the situation being forced upon her.

“All this over a pill she said she didn’t need to take?” Kylo growled and the nurse sobbed when he was finally released from the painful procedure. “If she says she doesn’t need it, then don’t let the droid force it upon her!”

“H-her file s-says t-t-to keep dosage f-for safety,” he tried to explain. “Withdrawal s-so sudden… It c-could be d-dangerous. W-we will fix it w-with the h-head doctor, I-I-I swear, please!”

Seeing the weak man offer the pill container, Kylo held still for a moment before snatching the bottle from him. “Get out.”

The nurse fled as quick as possible when the sliding door opened, and Kylo didn’t hesitate to use the short time frame to Force lift the remains of the med droid and throw it out of the hallway. The door eventually closed, sealing away the shocked faces of officers and BB units beeping curiously to the corpse of the medical droid. Punching his code to the panel to override the lock to keep anyone out, Kylo turned back from the closed door and made his way over to the still woman leaning against the opposite side.

Nova wasn’t shaking or behaving off, just irritated and upset by the ordeal she went through. As soon as Kylo stood in front of her, she pressed her face into his clothed chest and gripped his cape tightly. Tilting his helmet down to watch her, Kylo brought his free hand up to rest between her shoulder blades, making her exhale stressfully. He could feel her exhaustion when she projected it to him, letting the weight of his palm on her back attempt to soothe her temper.

“I do not want to take the pill,” she said. “I’m already tired. I’m too tired to take it, I do not need it.”

“You heard what he said, Nova,” Kylo tried to reason with her as serious as possible. Sneaking the hand from her back to tilt her chin up, he observed the slight shadows under her sparkly eyes and how tired she looked. “Decreasing the dosage that suddenly can affect your health, if you don’t do it properly.”

Kylo has noticed her becoming tired more easily as of late, often returning home with him and not having a desire to eat all of her dinner. Usually, Nova was very excited to consume all of her food, but now she had no enthusiasm to eat nearly half of her portion. When she used to wake at the early morning cycle with no problem - sometimes even before Kylo - was now replaced with Nova struggling to wake up easily or requesting him to let her have another moment to close her eyes. She also has been using her silver whistle during training more often, and lacking her enthusiasm in sparring with others or with him in meditating. A bit slow and jerky, Nova had slowly showed her changing behavior through the past week and Kylo had been keeping an eye on her about it. He knew of the common symptoms of the everlasting snow blizzards causing people to become depressed and tired with the constant darkness and lack of fresh air, and he wondered if Nova was having the same issue. Kylo had requested her food portions to provide more vitamins and nutrients for her immune system, but with her lack of eating…

“Come along, love,” Kylo urged softly, his voice modulator crackling with his gentle tone. Bringing his hand down to take hers, he led her to the door that brought them into their quarters and to his side of the room. Having her sit on his bed while he removed his helmet to put aside, Kylo knelt down in front of her with his knees on the floor.

Nova yawned and rubbed under her eyes sorely, looking to the single pill with absolute disgust upon seeing it in his hand. Kylo followed her gaze and rest his other hand on her covered knee, his thumb brushing the curve as he looked at her with careful eyes, giving her patience and his sole attention.

“You need to take the pill tonight and get some sleep,” he spoke to her carefully. “I will send a message right now to the medbay doctor to change the dosage to reduce the sleeping medicine this very instant, but I need you to take this one tonight to keep flow for the withdrawal. You haven’t been feeling well lately, so please understand how serious this can be if we’re not careful. Do you understand, my darling?”

Sighing, Nova nodded with a small pout. “I scared that man, but I didn’t mean to...I’m sorry I broke the droid, Kylo.”

Taking her hand in his, he pressed a soft kiss to her knuckles. “Don’t worry about it, alright? It was just a stupid hunk of metal with terrible programming. Let me run you a warm bath to calm down before taking the pill.”

Kylo did so, letting her sit in the heated water to wash the stress of the day off and change into comfortable sleepwear. He had to get her to take the pill with her last attempt to refuse, giving her the glass of water and kissing her forehead as a reward when she swallowed the nasty medicine with a sickly expression. Pulling the blankets back and taking off his shirt for his turn in the refresher while Nova tucked herself in, Kylo turned for only a few minutes before finding his woman completely passed out with just her feet under the blankets. He was careful to brush wet strands out of her face, frowning when she didn’t flinch or react from the unexpected touch to her cheek. Not even within five minutes of consuming the pill, this was perhaps the quickest he has seen Nova asleep from the effects.

Taking a deep breath, Kylo brought the blanket up to her shoulder to ensure she was warm and comfortable before standing up. Sensing her Force signature seeming to cling on to his, he told himself that he was going to keep the refresher door open, incase she needed him for anything until he would join her in bed.

Monitoring Nova as soon as he would wake up from his habitual sleeping pattern, Kylo kept himself more close to watching her constant as possible, and keeping himself open to her presence. He would greet her carefully with gentle hands and a soft voice, letting her know that he was there while tracing the visible purple-colored veins emerging under her eyes and holding her shaky fingers against his cheek when she would return the gesture. Kylo would ask her how she was feeling as often as possible throughout the day, keeping mental note of the progress as the messages from the doctor approved of the reduced dosage and a new medical droid delivering the modified pills accordingly. He made sure she would eat the foods that provide vitamins and drinking fluids, yet there hasn’t been much improvement.

Watching as Nova blew the whistle between her lips from the board room above, Kylo made sure that she was provided with fresh water during her training with the stormtroopers. She was a lot more mobile today than usual, promising him that she was fine to direct the cadets better than sitting to the side and pointing things out - although he assumed it was because he informed her that he was shortening their own personal training sessions, and she didn’t like that. He couldn’t read any projections from her, much less sense anything off emitting from her or requesting access. Kylo had often had to approach her physically to remind her of his presence, as if she blanked out for a moment and forgot.

Still, as he followed an officer on a overhead balcony over the training area, his head was turned to keep his eyes on his significant other as she waved her arms to direct two stormtroopers into position, switching them to show her how their fighting patterns have improved from last time. He was only pretending to listen to the chattering officer on information to the next section of the construction plan he already knew way before, only doing as his scheduled told him to, as it was written by his Master.

Yeah, Kylo wasn’t paying attention to the officer.

Nova saw something with the two stormtroopers that made her blow her whistle for them to halt immediately. Getting up from her crouched position and making her way over, Kylo watched her speak with the whistle dangling from her lips between the two, with small hand gestures to their shoulders and abdomen in direction…

The stormtrooper holding a sparring staff was unknowingly projecting worry, making Kylo halt in his steps immediately. There was something wrong, and it was directed on the subject of the woman mentoring the group of EN Units.

Listening in closer to the one’s thoughts, Kylo heard the other verbally point out the dazed look in Nova’s eyes and the precipitation forming visibly on her forehead. Seeing her seem to slouch to one side for a split second, Kylo’s shoulders squared as he narrowed in on a set of stairs to hurry to her aid as he recognized the early stage of passing out. The officer who was speaking to him finally noticed the lack of the Commander behind him, turning around to call for his attention.

Kylo shoved the officer out of the way and ran towards the stairs when Nova collapsed to her knees, the stormtroopers nearby catching her arms to keep her upright.

“We have you all nice and hooked up to this tool called and IV,” the male doctor, Antona, explained to Nova as she was reclined in bed, lifting and dropping her whole arm that had curious tubes and patches sticking to her skin. Chuckling at the woman’s curiosity from the moment she woke up, the dark haired man was careful to halt her from fiddling any more by hovering his hand over her own. “Please, do not play around with it. It is helping provide extra fluid and medicine to you without you needing to consume anything.”

“It’s feeding me?” the apprentice asked with a disbelief look in her tired eyes. The doctor nodded and the woman trailed her eyes up the clear tube to look at the bag filled with clear liquid and the different machines monitoring her heart and breathing levels. “I don’t need to take any more of those gross pills?”

“Not while you’re in the medbay, Nova. Is it alright for me to call you that?” Doctor Antona asked politely at her level, kneeling down all while Kylo sat on the other side of the medbay bed she was stationed into, on a chair close to her. Kylo wasn’t touching her, his helmet keeping his stare on the doctor to see that he does the same as well; so far, his impression on the doctor was neutral. He was kind to Nova and made sure she was comfortable in the new environment, and he was sure to keep in contact with him as soon as he was instructed to leave.

Doctor Antona was someone to trust, and Nova also knew that and shared that thought with him through the Force.

Nova nodded, and it made the doctor relax. “Thank you, Nova. Now, I already have a new blood sample that I am going to study personally, just to see if there is anything unusual going on that the droids and nurses are not picking up. We have been having cases of head colds and flus among the stormtroopers, so this may just be a minor issue, with you being up-to-date with all your vaccines. I will alert the Commander accordingly to anything I may do and ensure you also give me consent; I understand that you aren’t quite comfortable with people in the medbay, but I assure you that it will only be me, my assistant and smaller droids.”

“Not the droids that will want to give me medicine…” Nova spoke warily.

Doctor Antona shook his head. “These will only come in periodically only to check the machines, to update your file, and let me know if there is any sudden changes. They won’t touch you without your permission.”

The room’s door slid open and a woman with freckled skin, red hair and wickedly green eyes, wearing a similar First Order MB uniform to Doctor Antona walked into the room. She only spared the Commander a short, respectful nod of greeting before the standing man beckoned her over closer, all while Nova openly stared at the quiet woman.

“Nova, this is my assistant, Mara,” Doctor Antona introduced. “She will have access here to tend to your IV and any other medications you need to feel better, alright? Do not hesitate to request for either of us, should you need anything, otherwise the machines will alert if there is an emergency.”

“Your IV will be changed to provide you with the proper dose of sleeping medicine, as Doctor Antona prescribed soon, hopefully, within the next hour to give you enough sleep while you take in more fluids before testing,” Mara spoke with a neutral voice, and Kylo wondered if she would be patient and kind to Nova as her superior was. He couldn’t sense much from the redhead, making him wonder if she was from the training facility not too long ago before being taken under the doctor’s wing. Still, he was more focused on the patient than to meddle into other people’s heads at the moment.

Looking to the Commander, Doctor Antona dipped his head to Kylo. “Sir, should you need any sort of update on Nova’s condition at any time, you can look into her file through the holopad after visiting hours. You have complete access, as requested.”

Kylo gave him a single nod before the two medical professions made their way out of the room. Waiting until the door closed, Kylo turned his helmet to see Nova gazing curiously back up to the IV. Her thoughts bubbling with an idea, Kylo sighed through his nose and reached to rest his gloved hand on her bicep to pull her out of her thoughts. Once Nova turned her cheek his way on the pillow, she pretended that she wasn’t feeling as ill as she truly was and gave him a soft smile.

“Don’t think about playing with that,” he warned her, his vocoder making it sound more threatening than necessary, yet the woman just shrugged. “I mean it, Nova. Don’t make me come here in the middle of the night cycle, because you ripped all the IVs and patches off.”

“I won’t… I don’t think I’ll like sleeping here, though,” she admitted with a small frown, looking away from him. She was still dressed in her sleeveless uniform and still had her boots on ontop of the bed. Kylo knew what she was saying, having been on the beds and cots before and dreaded his time on the hard mattress and oddly-smelling blankets. The sheets were itchy and the room reeked of disinfectant and latex, a very uncomfortable combination. Nova had denied being stripped, not really wanting anyone to remove her clothes and see the hidden horrors on her skin to strangers, yet she projected her thoughts to Kylo on how she wished he would hold her instead and bring them both back to their quarters for solitude and low lights.

His thumb tracing a very faint scar on her arm, barely visible, Kylo leaned his other elbow on the edge of the crinkled bedding. “I know, Nova, but this is for your health. I would rather have you come back comfortable and healthy, and not falling down again.”

Despite her ailing complexion, Nova’s cheeks went red with embarrassment as she refused to look at him. Kylo reached over, sensing that no one was aiming to disturb this room or coming anywhere near the room, and gently turned her head to look back up to his empty mask. Getting up from his reserved spot on the chair, Kylo bent his back forward as he carefully touched the rim of the top visors with her forehead and the tip of her nose on his mouth cover. All while she finally kept her eyes on him and staring where his eyes would be, her mind poking him at how she wished his helmet was removed so she could kiss his nose or cheeks, making him smile a bit behind his shield.

“If you behave and get better, you may give me plenty and receive even more to make up for lost time,” he told her and she was quick to smile again with a joyful spark in her eye that made his heart flutter. “Relax now, and I’ll come to see how you are in the morning. They will be bringing the IV containing the sleeping medicine for you shortly.”

“I won’t like sleeping without you by my side, just to let you know. I’ll do it, but I will not like it,” Nova stated to him when he slowly pulled back, and he nodded. “And you will come see me as soon as you can?”

“I will reach out to you through the Force, if should your file show any signs of you being stressed or uncomfortable.”

Kylo read over Nova’s medical file that was being updated as a feed every half hour, as the droids checked in on her IV and machines that checked her heart, lungs, brain pattern and breathing. He had the screen lit up on his bed while he sat on the floor with the next process of construction that he would leave in the middle to go back to the Supremacy, maps of the underground system Kyber mines and machinery that would be shipped down.

It was the second night since Nova’s admission to the medbay and Kylo had kept to his promise in spending his early mornings and late evenings to see her and keep her entertained in a professional setting. Knowing that the two still had to keep their relationship a secret, he had to settle with mental conversations and shared images while she remained on her back on the uncomfortable bed. He couldn’t see much of an improvement, even though Doctor Antona has claimed that she is taking in her fluids perfectly healthy, and yet the shadows under her eyes were still evident and her smiles remained tired. The blood sample Antona had was still in the process of being studied by him, apparently having found something he hadn’t seen before on Starkiller Base, and would alert Kylo as soon as he had answers.

‘It can’t be anything threatening, if she’s completely conscious like she is. Her vitals from the machines are all healthy, which is a very good sign,’ Doctor Antona had said assuringly to the masked Commander earlier, still promising to keep working on the sample while Mara went to change the IV bag periodically.

Nova didn’t complain a bit about her physical comfort, just smiling to Kylo and teasing him to take off his helmet for her own amusement. He could sense she was a bit sore sleeping on her back, and ordered one of the droids to bring an extra pillow for her back, which Nova puffed her cheeks as he stuffed it under her. Despite her sickly appearance and extreme lack of appetite, she seemed perfectly healthy to him and just wanted to go back to their quarters. Mara had to remind her, rather blunt and serious, that Nova was to remain in her position until Doctor Antona says she may be discharged.

At the end of his evening visit, Kylo promised her that he will be keeping track of her progress and bring her something to amuse herself with the next morning. The woman only sighed in response, nodding her head before mumbling how she just wants to share a bed with him again. Kylo could only suffice her needs by touching his helmet with the curve of her forehead and brush his gloved hand to her cheek, promising her that it will come soon enough. It didn’t seem to trick the other apprentice as he had hoped, yet she nuzzled him back briefly before he left.

Everything was fine. That’s what everyone was telling Kylo with honesty, and he could sense it in them as he dug a bit to ensure that they were all telling the truth...

Still, it wasn’t going to stop Kylo’s eyes from darting periodically to his holopad.

Zeroing in on Nova’s Force wall still surrounding the quarters, Kylo pushed out to find Nova from across the Starkiller Base. He released a soft breath when he felt her signature instantly reach out to his and held on in a excited leap, melting against his Force signature rather affectionately as it told him that she was currently asleep. Minding the time of the cycle, the Commander was glad that the woman was sleeping, allowing his Force to embrace hers carefully as he went back to reading the files of the head of construction carefully. Still dressed in his uniform, his helmet off to the side, Kylo Ren flipped through one construction set before finding the file he was suppose to look over. Being able to only get through one file before there was a alert on the pad near the door, stealing his attention, the task was forgotten.

Frowning, the young man got to his feet and approached the pad to see someone was requesting access into the private hall. Swiping the screen, Kylo’s eyes narrowed as he saw Doctor Antona waiting with a tight line on his lips while outside the other door.

Leaving the quarters, only helmetless from his uniform, Kylo opened the locked door and looked down to the doctor jumping out of nerves. The Commander decided to ignore the panicked look on his face and stood there, waiting.

“Doctor Antona,” Kylo eventually spoke as the older man swallowed and took a deep breath.

“Commander Ren, I have information of the blood sample I took from Nova, and need to speak with you as soon as I possibly can,” he said in a whisper, despite barely anyone out in the halls at this time of night.

Narrowing his eyes, Kylo sensed the doctor’s panic, yet he couldn’t place it anywhere specific without causing discomfort to his target. Eventually taking a step aside, Kylo allowed the doctor to enter through the threshold before closing the door sharply.

“Start speaking,” Kylo demanded.

“I have found something unusual from the sample; something that should have not been capable to catch from the Supremacy nor from Starkiller Base. It appears that Nova has contracted a very rare virus that is said to be extinct,” Doctor Anatona fretted quickly. “If I haven’t heard of it before, then there would have been an even greater damage done to her, if we do not act soon.”

“What?”

“Long before either you or I were born, there was a airborne disease that only targeted beings that hold abilities, such as the old Jedi Knights,” Antona began as he pulled out a bacta pump filled with murky, dark fluid from his doctor’s coat. “It would kill the victims within a few days, but, from my studies on Nova’s sample these last couple days, she has had it for more than six months…”

Kylo’s nose scrunched with fury as he glared at the bacta pump in the doctor’s hands. “And what is that suppose to be?”

“The vaccine, sir. I was able to swipe some chemicals from the medbay lab and bring it to my own personal unit, along with Nova’s sample as an antibody. It’s enough to sustain her and stop the virus before getting her into a tank,” Antona spoke quickly. Looking to the Commander, it was obvious that he was trying to hurry with the explanation. “This will kill the virus in her body, but she needs it now before -”

The lights inside the hallway shut down, swarming the two in pitch black darkness that scared the doctor into silence and the Commander to lift his head up to look around. It was odd to him, as if the presence surrounding the quarters was different…

Kylo couldn’t sense Nova’s Force signature.

The overhead speaker clicked on, and Kylo’s frown deepened to a more expressive state as the monotone voice of a droid emerged. “All certified squad units please report to stations. Starkiller Base on lockdown, this is not a drill. All certified squad units are to report to designated pin and ready at Section I-J, Number 1-8-9-1. Starkiller Base on lockdown, this is not a drill.”

“Section…” Kylo snarled as he slashed his hand out to force the chrome doors open with a aggravated hiss. Antona jumped at the sound as the red lighting of the backup generators for the lockdown hummed to life while the Commander stalked out of the hallway in a fast pace.

The doctor was quick to follow after the young man as they trekked nearly halfway through the main base towards the medbay; stormtroopers marching and cluttering the closer they got until they passed the main entrance of the desk to see the damage.

Dead nurses and doctors littered the wreckage of the secluded medbay unit, and droids shattered to nothing but bolts and electric screws. The hallway was messed with broken glass and dented walls, as if someone rammed themselves against it, and the called units were busy scrambling to carry off the deceased and see further into the situation. Kylo didn’t pay them any mind as he marched through and made a direct line towards the one room he cared for, all with the doctor calling behind him and the stormtroopers trying to stop him.

Nova’s room was borderline unrecognizable. The bed was flipped over and crushed like an aluminum can and the IV bag that was once connected to the patient appeared to have exploded, now dripping the fluid from the bent pole it was hooked on. The machines were sparking electric sparks from the exposed wires, making a dangerous hazard to any exposed skin coming close to it. Kylo’s bare eyes scanned the room with blazing fire within them, his chest starting to rise and fall rapidly as he pushed his Force out to find the missing patient…

Everything was scattered. Nothing was right. Danger. Fear.

Someone was scared. Someone was lost and so, so afraid.

Nova.

“Doctor Antona, sir,” a officer called out to the dark haired man appearing to be bewildered by the state of the room. “We have checked the holorecords and found that the patient inside the room went rogue, yet the machines assigned to this room still shows that she is asleep.”

“Where is she now?” Kylo interjected in a low voice, not turning around as both men glanced his way.

A second too long passed, and the officer was slammed against the wall right outside the room and pinned with his feet dangling desperately. Antona froze as Kylo turned around and snatched the bacta pump out of his hand as he approached the officer, prying deep into his mind to find the images and words he needed:

Target broke from the emergency exit near 5-8-9-1, headed into woods with unit following tar...

Target not responding, must use immediate action to...

Lost contact with units following into blizzard...storm interference, perhaps? Waiting to hear -

“As soon as you hear from the units, you will command them to fall back immediately,” Kylo instructed darkly, dropping the officer before glaring back to Antona. “You will see to what happened here, and await my call. You answer to no one else.”

“W-what will you do, Commander?” Antona asked, his brows furrowed with concern.

“I’m going after her alone. I’m taking the vaccine with me.”

“Commander Ren, the Base is in lockdown, you won’t be able to get out or return inside to any of the main buildings once it’s official,” the weak officer tried to stop him, yet Kylo walked right passed him. “It’s too dangerous! The blizzard!”

Following the numbers towards the exit she went through, Kylo began feeling the sudden drop in temperature as he approached the gaping hole that remained one of the once locked exits. It was as if it was peeled apart, and radiated an unhealthy amount of Force used to break the heavy and hard material. No stormtrooper ever stopped Kylo as he marched through to the outdoors, ignoring the stinging in his cheeks and nose as he kept pushing through the heavy snowfall towards the woods, the snow up to his knees and wind trying to force him back as the alarms continued to echo through the storm.

Grinding his teeth, Kylo kept going as he registered the distant pain and suffering happening deep in the blizzard.

Fun fact: Doctor Antona is an official character in the Star Wars video game franchise. Nova’s medbay number is also a homage to Indiana Jones with the release year backwards (I know Galatic Basic isn’t like the English alphabet, but I don’t care c:)

taglist: @ayatimascd @ymariejp @yippee-ki-yay-motherfucker460 @formerly-anonhamster @rosalynbair @redhairedfeistynerd

Remember, if you would like to be tagged for future chapters, please don’t hesitate to message me! I’d be more than happy to add you. Thank you for reading and I hope to hear from you!

#pilotanonwrites #kylo ren x reader #kylo x reader #oc/reader insert #reader insert #preludekylofic

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purplexflamingo · 6 years ago

Note

write a drabble about the birth of Frankie and if Fred is an anxious chicken or not

December 23rd 7:02 p.m.

It was a silent evening, the snow storm was to thank for that. Everyone retreated to their homes after a holiday get together. It was a strange day, just so many people, it was overwhelming. It felt nice to have her space.

Heather sat by the large front windows in her living room. Snuggled up underneath a large fleece blanket reading her novel and enjoying a small cup of night time tea. The cup rested on the end tablet nearest to her and there were moments she would forget it was even there. While finally comfortable, she was still miserable. Her back ached endlessly with the extra weight and her feet felt so numb. It was exhausted moving sometimes. So she tried to do so in little amounts. Sometimes she’d end up sleeping in the living room and avoided the stairs. Depending on how she felt. Though she missed her bed. She reached the point where she was so over being eight months pregnant. Yet she had no choice but to stay like this. Even though she was a week late. Doctors would not induce her till Monday. After the holidays of course. If she'd have it her way she have the baby now. Groaning she lowered her book on her lap. Even sitting just ached.

The sound of her father fumbling around in the kitchen caught her attention. Alarming her with the sound of a beer can cracking open. It drove her to sound threatening.

" Dad....that better not be what I think it is!"

" I'll just have one, I promise, just one."

Digging her nails into her book out of sheer frustration. He had been fighting his addiction for a long time and Heather couldn't stand for him to give up now. Not when she needed an extra hand with the baby. In a weird sense she was alone with this. Especially during the day.

" God, no! Why are you slipping up again--- Dad I need you, stop it! For once would you think about me and not yourself. You've always done this to me!"

Unable to hold her tongue she yelled and received a scowl from Joel as he appeared in the door way. Something was off. He still with the beer in hand. She felt uncomfortable.

" What is the use? My own daughter won't even talk to me, she keeps secrets from me. Who knows who the fucking babies dad is...why are you not nagging him?! What the fuck Heather?! Y-you are not even fit to be a mother, why keep it? Why?!"

" Oh don't you dare turn this around on me! I'll pretend I didn't hear what you just said, seriously! I....It's very complicated and if I could I would tell you, but not when your clearly drunk. Just....just fine drink how much you want, just go screw it all up like your damn career. Go a head! Leave me the fuck alone then!"

Without thinking she stood up quickly in anger, bumping the end table in the process and spilt the tea all over the wood floor. The cup even cracked from the impact. In defeat she tossed her book aside and stormed off to her room upstairs. Choking back tears. It was difficult to breath as her chest grew heavy with emotions. A pit in her stomach grew. The fight left a bitter taste in her mouth.

" Heather! Heather please just talk to me! We'll fix this--- Listen to your father. I'll get better-- I'll--"

His pleading ended when she slammed her bedroom door shut. She wanted to just sleep it off, but the baby sleeps during the day mostly and keeps her up at night. At this point she was running on fumes. Barely keeping herself awake. Gently she sat on her bed and buried her face into her hands. Usually she would not let a fight like this get to her, but right now she was in a questionable state. Soon she raised her head when she felt her shoulders being massaged.

" He is a asleep isn't he?"

" Yes."

A deep voice responded. The heat of his breathe reached her ear and caused her to shutter. But the sensation of the rubbing felt wonderful, much needed. Moaning at the touch.

" Ah, Don't stress your pretty little head, relax....too much stress is not good for the baby."

The demon spoke, softer than his normal. It was almost soothing and at one point she found herself leaning on him. He seemed so...caring.

" It is kind of hard when I am bouncing in between the dream world and the real world. It makes me feel almost dizzy."

His hand ghosted over her stomach. Purring into her ear, his voice rumbled.

" He is quite the little dreamer."

" He either gives me nightmares or heart burn....or both. "

As much as she wanted to joke about that situation, she couldn't fight this feeling of lack of importance. Tears continued to stream down her face as she stared off.

“ Careful, he can feel your stress. I’ve come to notice, the more he experiences your distress the more frightful his dreams become”

Pausing to think about it, she felt shame. But it was hard managing this.

Endlessly rubbing at her eyes, pretending she wasn’t sobbing. She was exhausted to deal with anything at this point. Mentally and psychically.His grin faded quickly, exhaling through his nose. Pressing a kiss against her temple.

" Forget that fucker, you'll make a wonderful mother. WE don’t need him-- YOU don’t need him. Fuck him."

She presumed he'd know about any quarrels as he can look into her subconscious. They happened frequently and he knew the toll it took on her. That alone made him worried for the child’s safety. While he was not much for affection she knew he was always there and willing to protect her. Fully aware he seemed agitated to say the least, about being unable to do anything. He wasn't carrying on with his banter like normal. A first indication something was not right. Before he could say anything else a wave of sharp pain struck her, drawing her out of his world. Whining from the immense cramping caused especially in her lower back and hips. Leaning forward as she panted rapidly. Her ears rang and the more pain she felt the urge to pass out grew strong, she had to fight it. The moment she did feel as she would, a tight squeeze on the hand snapped her out of it. Screaming she panicked.

" Dad! Dad!"

Rushing into her room he was stumbling due to his intoxication. But he was highly alert. Peering up at him she painfully spoke.

" I-It's time..!"

----

December 24th 3:30 a.m.

It had been thirty minutes since the birth of her baby boy. The procedure had been changed to an emergency c-section due to the newborn not fitting through the birth canal. After meeting the infant for the first time, she fell asleep. The child slept soundly too after the commotion, in a bassinet provided by the hospital. Nurses and doctors began to leave them alone.

A whisper began coaxing her to wake up, fluttering her eyes open. She was still coming down off of the epidural. Met with the sight of Freddy creeping towards the bassinet. He latched on to Heather when he forced her to wake up so he could come into the real world. Closing her eyes once more and opening them minutes later seemed to be a normal pattern for her. She frequently rested. He now sat on the edge of her bed. The feeling of the bed shifting woke her from her on and off slumber.

" He is beautiful..."

Directing her gaze at the dream demon, a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. Hearing him say such a thing made her want to melt. Inching her weak hand to rest on his forearm. This caused him to glance at her, his face lit up when he noticed. Forcing herself to speak, her words slurring slightly, but he could understand her.

" How is Frankie?"

Rearranging himself, he handed the child over. Carefully aiding her and supporting his head in the process. He knew exactly what he was doing, he was rather confident. Sliding beside her.

It felt like she already knew her son and loved him, words could not express it. Freddy plagued her for months with dreams about him, it could have been his excitement too. To be fair she looked forward to this. She felt very attached to the small human. Sliding her finger in between Frankie's grasp. Admiring such tiny fingers. Despite him being a large baby, he still felt small. There was no doubt she trembled as she worried about handling him.

" He is just fine, Mommy. Don’t worry..."

Freddy responded, cooing, and she turned to place a kiss on his lips. Nuzzling up against him before looking back at her son.“ He is perfect...you don’t understand. How did we create something so beautiful...”

He humbly chuckled listening to her and was quick to point out her tears that swelled. Poking fun at her. With a familiar smug look.

“ Awh, you’re crying.”“ Hey-- Leave me alone. I am experiencing so many emotions you don’t even know the half of it. I am also still high on medication.”

He couldn’t resist teasing her. After she smothered the infant in kisses he reclaimed the child. Fortunately he knew exactly what he was doing and seemed to take charge rather well, he had the experience. Though things have changed since the 60s. She had no doubt in this man. She trusted him with the child and knew he meant well. He loved the boy and she knew it.

“ Now, Heather, get some rest I’ll take over from here. We have a bit of father and son bonding to do.”“ W-wait, what if my father shows up? I can’t...I...”

Nerves were still high, but Freddy was quick to reassure her. Now he seemed much more serious.

“ I’ll deal with him. Now rest, baby doll. Don’t make me have to tell you again.”

Sighing she agreed.

“ I love you....Freddy.”

#oc x canon #long post #writing #what is writing #i am nervous writing sometimes pff #heather greene #franklin james krueger #swears?#nightmaremaster

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