#i want to leave the laptop alone for as long as possible today cuz it's what my computer guy told me to do

[ratspider]

i cannot draw because i have to Prime My New Laptop Battery. bwuh

[watchmegetobsessed]

Update - Harry Styles

i’ve been deep inmy harry feels and this thought just wouldn’t leave me alone so i had to write it. im thinking about starting a taglist for harry, i think i’ll write more about him in the future. let me know if you’d be interested in the taglist!

word count: ~5.9k

masterlist

Sequel: The best present

Harry is not that into YouTube videos, has never really been, which is kind of ironic seeing the number of videos on the internet that is about him. The man himself who makes everyone talk online feels weird seeing someone talking on his screen, looking into his soul as if they were right there with him. But today he felt the sudden urge to be like his peers and get lost in random rambling videos from strangers, who felt the need to put themselves out there.

He has made a mean cup of tea for himself, made himself comfortable on his couch with his laptop balancing on his thighs and now is opening up his browser to unwind in an unusual way. As YouTube opens in front of his tired eyes, he stops when he tries to type in the keywords he is searching for. What is he looking for really? He thinks to himself trying to remember what he heard from his friends when they talked about funny or interesting videos. One thing is for sure, he is trying to avoid watching videos of himself in any content. He has had enough of him for the day, it’s time to focus on someone else, even if he doesn’t know the person.

He scrolls through several pages of many different keywords until he settles for a video where a girl talks about how her latest moving day went. Starting off Harry feels weird listening to her talk about such personal things as where her bed went in her room, how she packed all her stuff to fit them in the boxes, but soon enough this feeling settles and he starts to realize it’s kind of relaxing.

It doesn’t take too long for him to fall down a rabbit hole and by the time his tea empties out from his cup he is intensely watching a guy rant about his boss at Subway while doing a mukbang. The latter is a new discovery for Harry, he has never heard of it before, but he can see why some people find it satisfying.

The video ends, Harry checks the time and sees that it’s already after midnight and he hasn’t even realized how fast time flew by.

“Alright, just one more,” he mumbles to himself scrolling down the column of the recommended videos until his eyes stop at one particular upload at the very bottom.

July update for my Sammy, ready the title and an eye-catchingly beautiful girl is smiling from the thumbnail. He finds her breathtaking, the lack of makeup, the worn out hoodie she is wearing and the many various plants in the background makes it appear she is sitting in the middle of the forest.

Harry finds himself clicking on the video before he could even decide consciously to watch it. The screen loads and the girl appears in front of him, this time in a much larger size.

“Hi Sammy, welcome back to our channel,” she starts with an angelic little laugh as she pulls her shoulders up to her ears as if the camera is making her shy. She has no reason to be shy, Harry thinks to himself. His second thought is about Sammy, he is one lucky guy to know this angel and have her think about him. “It’s Y/N here, your one and only sister,” she adds.

Sister. The word brings Harry relief and he is surprised to feel this way, but he has no time to think anything of it because she starts talking again.

“Here is my July update, I’m sorry I’m a little late, but we got back from Oregon yesterday. Aunt Ella is sending you kisses and hugs, she missed you at the barbeque, or maybe it was just your helping hand at the grill,” she chuckles to herself, probably recalling the memory.

Harry has no idea who Aunt Ella is or where she lives in Oregon, but the way she talks about it makes him feel like he is part of the family a little.

Y/N carries on and starts talking about everything that has happened in July. Painting the shed at her parents’ home, buying a new armchair, one her cat absolutely adores and refuses to sleep anywhere else now, she went to the hairdresser to get a trim, but not too much. She tells about her plans for August, how she is thinking about going to the farmers’ market more often, and she has been playing with the idea of adopting another cat.

“I think Henry has been feeling a little lonely lately. He could use a buddy,” she tells the camera, her eyes moving to the side from where a weak but moody meow can be heard as an answer. “Yeah, I think he agrees,” she chuckles and Harry finds himself smiling at the screen.

At the end of the video she asks a few questions from Sammy, how he has been doing, if his wrist feels any better, even asks about a friend called Matthew. Harry wonders if she has ever gotten the answers to her questions and where Sammy saw this video. What is he doing that made her want to do an update on YouTube?

When the video ends Harry clicks on her profile faster than he would willingly admit to anyone and it’s like he opened the gate to paradise. Tens and maybe hundreds of videos are queuing on her page, monthly updates, birthday wishes, short story times about family gatherings, news and happenings in her life.

Harry gets lost in her tales. He watches video after video, noticing the smallest details about her, almost mentally taking notes about her updates, finding anything and everything she talks about so interesting as if he knew those people and places she mentions. He comes to realization that Sammy is her older brother who is serving somewhere in the military. Y/N is making the videos to update him about her life even if she knows most of them doesn’t get to him until weeks later, but it doesn’t seem to bother her. He also learns that Sammy sends them back lengthy emails once a month and always ends them with a joke they made up with his mates at the army. Y/N loves them even when they're not even funny, she never fails to mention that she smiled reading them.

Hours pass by and the rising Sun peeks inside the window pulling Harry back to his own reality, shocked that he just spent the whole night watching her videos and didn’t even realize how deep he has gotten in her life. Lucky for him he has nothing planned until the afternoon, so shutting his laptop he sets it aside and heads straight to bed, but lying between his silky sheets he catches himself staring out the window, wondering what Y/N might be doing right now. From what he collected she lives somewhere in Spokane and has family in Seattle and Portland, which puts her quite a few time zones behind him. He finds the thought of them going to bed at the same time despite the distance a little funny. He lies in bed for quite some time before he finally drifts off to sleep with a particular girl on his mind, who doesn’t even know he is thinking about her.

 “Do you think you can fall for someone you have never met?”

Harry’s question catches Mitch a little off-guard, but he is kind of used to his random bits of thoughts. Pouring some sugar into his coffee he follows the wondering singer to a free table in the corner.

“Isn’t it what all your fans feel?” he answers with a question, earning a surprised look from Harry. He hasn’t thought about this side, now the situation is kind of ironic, he supposes.

“Y’re right,” he nods stirring his coffee around in the small cup.

“Want to let me in on your thoughts?”

Harry feels a little shy to admit how he has watched all of her videos in the past few days, 207 to be exact and now he feels an oddly deep connection to this girl he has never even seen outside of a screen. Last night he dug up her Instagam profile, and even though she is not posting as frequently as she does on her channel, it was a refreshing change to see her in different settings. Chilling at a lake, having drinks with her friends, playing with her parents’ puppy, it amazed him that she has a whole life outside that small portion she lets him see in her videos.

Hesitantly, but he tells his friend about his latest hobby, if it’s not too weird to call it that, while his friend patiently listens and nods along his words while sipping on his morning coffee.

“D’you think I’m crazy?” Harry sighs leaning back in his seat, looking at his friend and colleague for validation that he hasn’t lost his mind entirely.

“Definitely not,” he chuckles shaking his head. “It’s like falling for that girl in school you know so much about but never really met.”

“Only that I’m stalkin’ this poor girl.”

“This is not stalking. We both know it’s far from that.” Harry nods with slight relief that his situation doesn’t seem as bad as he has been feeling lately. “Have you gotten in touch with her?”

“And what am I supposed to do? Comment on her video that I think her cat’s a cutie and I watched all her videos in three days ‘cuz I think she’s beautiful and I find her voice soothing?”

Mitch lets out a soft chuckle at the oddly specific answer he just gave and finds it amusing how interested his friend has grown about someone in such a short time.

“Maybe phrase it a little different.”

“So you do think I should reach out?”

“I don’t see why you shouldn’t. Use your personal YouTube, leave her a nice comment. Maybe she’ll reply.”

“And then what?”

“I don’t know, Harry,” he chuckles. “Just go with it and you’ll see. You are obviously interested in her, it’s better than just sit and watch her videos.”

Harry agrees. It wouldn’t hurt to try to reach out to her, possibly in a not too creepy way. Maybe just a sweet comment on one of her videos and if she replies… Well, he doesn’t know what comes after, but he’ll figure it out.

 Y/N updates regularly. Usually once a week and mostly it’s Sunday when a new video gets uploaded. This next Sunday Harry finds himself checking her page occasionally through the day to see if there’s a new update, but it seems like she is missing today. Right until he is driving home and gets a notification from the app.

Y/N has just uploaded a new video! It reads and Harry’s heart beats a tad bit faster. He thinks about pulling over to see it right away, but he tells himself that would be a bit too much, so he is forced to wait until he is in the comfort of his home.

Finally sitting on his couch he opens up his laptop and clicks on the video that has the title: September update.

Y/N sits in her usual spot, Henry in her arms as she is gently stroking his head with a warm smile on her face.

“Hi Sammy! Welcome back to our channel,” she greets him with her usual words and Harry loves how she calls the channel theirs. “This is my September update, even though not much has happened,” she breathes out, eyes wandering to the window besides her and Harry wonders what she sees from her window every day. Does she live in the city? Is it an apartment or a house with a backyard? Are there any trees or does her room have a terrible view, maybe just another house next to hers?

She starts her talk about the month, which she spent mostly with working, a little shopping and meeting her friends. She tells him about her planned trip to the local shelter to see possible new kittens to add to her household and Harry feels himself growing excited about it. He even thinks about what kind of cat he can see get along well with Henry even though he has never even met him.

“Anyway, mom and dad miss you, I miss you too. I loved your joke about ducks in your latest email,” she chuckles sweetly, bringing a smile to Harry’s face as well. “Mom is excited to see you at Christmas, our cousins will come to Portland as well. Maya can’t wait to play Jenga with you, she said she’s been practicing.”

The video soon ends as Y/N tells Sammy how much she loves him and eventually turns the camera off.

He straight away moves the cursor to the beginning of the video and as she starts talking again he scrolls down to the comment section that’s entirely empty. There are only two views on her video, usually a hundred is the max, but she doesn’t seem to care about the views, it’s more about the message.

He clicks to type a comment, but his hands stop above the keyboard as he tries to think of what to write. Mitch was right about taking a chance at reaching out, but what is he supposed to write exactly? Everything that comes to his mind sounds so creepy and scary, and he knows it’s weird that he formed such a deep connection to an unknown girl online. At last he starts typing.

“Hi Y/N! I’ve stumbled across your videos the other day. Love how you keep your brother updated, it’s such a nice gesture. I hope life treats you and Sammy well, you truly deserve it. Good luck with finding a buddy for Henry! Love, an admirer of yours, H.”

He reads it back several times, deleting then retyping it again until he decides to just go with it. A rush of adrenaline washes over his body when he sends the comment and it’s officially out there. Secretly he wishes she would reply right away, but moments pass by, then moments turn into minutes and nothing happens. His comment stands there alone and he has to realize that maybe she will never even reply or even see it.

It doesn’t matter, he tells himself as he shuts the laptop down and goes on to do his things, but he finds his thoughts wander over to her from time to time.

He has a busy day ahead of him the next day, quite a few meetings and a fitting. He checks back for a reply in the morning, but it slips his mind the moment he leaves from home and his phone rings right away. Throughout the day he basically barely has time to check his emails, his other notifications are just sitting patiently on the bar, waiting for him to acknowledge them. It’s way past five in the afternoon when he finally have some time for himself after his fitting. He is sitting in his car, people walk past him without even realizing who is sitting behind the tinted windows. Scrolling down he gets rid of everything that doesn’t seem urgent until his eyes stop at one particular notification.

“Y/N replied to your comment,” he reads it out loud, just to make it real, as if he is seeing it wrong and saying it with his own mouth brings it to life. He quickly taps on it and the familiar video opens up and while Y/N starts talking again the screen jumps down to the comments where, in fact, there is a reply from her.

“Dear H! Thank you for your heartfelt comment! I always forget it’s not just my family who sees these videos, but I’m happy you found them interesting enough to watch a few of them.”

“A few?” Harry huffs to himself feeling a little ridiculous he has watched all of them.

“I hope I didn’t bore you too much. Thank you for the well wishes for me, my brother and Henry too. He is sending his love to you. Y/N xx”

The comment was posted three hours ago. The thought that she has acknowledged his existence with not only reading but also replying to his comment brings him extreme joy. He reads her words over and over again, looking for any clue that would give away that she found his comment weird, but it seems like she was more surprised and happy that someone else saw her video besides her brother. Harry starts to type his reply without hesitation.

“Bore me? You saved me from watching another “what’s in my bag” video the other day. It was a pleasant change. I love your plants, by the way. Your room always gives off the most relaxed vibes. It reminded me I should have more of them in my home. H”

Harry smiles to himself posting his comment, the fear of appearing like a stalker long gone from him, the interaction is making his inside blossom from joy. For his biggest surprise a reply appears just a few minutes away and Harry reads Y/N’s new lines with deep hunger.

“Those videos suck the life out of me every time! I might be having a problem with buying too many plants, but I can’t help myself. They truly bring peace to me just by looking at them. I’m glad you are planning on buying some more, you won’t regret it!”

Harry is dying to reply, but he doesn’t want to look too eager and needy, so he opts for just liking her comment to let her know he read it and agrees. He locks his phone and puts it aside with the widest smile on his face as he starts his car and leaves his parking spot.

Two weeks pass by. In those two weeks Y/N uploads two more videos, one about her time with her grandparents, for a change it was filmed at their home and they even said hello in it. Harry feels wholesome seeing her with her granny and grandpa, it’s clear she cares a lot about them. The other video is just a short one where she has met some of Sammy’s old high school friends and she had a check in from them, sending a sweet message to him through the video. Harry doesn’t doubt how much these little things mean to Sammy, even if he doesn’t get to see them right away. Seeing Y/N alone boosts his mood every time she uploads a new video, he can only imagine how they make Sammy feel.

He leaves comments on her videos without a second thought and she replies to all of them, a lot of the time almost immediately. These are the highlights of his days without exception. Knowing that she has anything to do with him just fascinates him and he is starting to realize what his fans feel towards him on a different level. Whenever he sees the notification that she has replied to what he wrote or that she uploaded a new video he flies right to her page to check it, no matter what he is doing. Some of their comment threads turn out pretty lengthy, almost like a chat conversation and it has Harry wonder how they could maybe move it to somewhere else from the comment section.

He wants to ask for her number, but figures it wouldn’t be the best idea. Regardless of how much he enjoys their short little conversations, the situation is still weird and complicated and he doesn’t want to forget that.

But he is pleasantly surprised when she brings it up herself, to move the conversation to somewhere else.

“Would love to discuss that more with you. Up for exchanging IG names?” her question reads and he blinks a few before he fully comprehends that she wants to talk to him more in private. However there’s no way he can send her his real Instagram profile and making a fake one would be way too suspicious. Opening up the private messages he sends her a short, but informative message.

“I don’t use Instagram, but feel free to text me,” and then his phone number.

He sits at the dinner table anxiously, waiting for his phone to light up from a new text, and just a few minutes later it finally comes.

“Hi! It’s Y/N,” he reads from the notification and he saves the number right away.

“Hello! Save me as Harry. I haven’t even told you my name yet, how rude of me!” he replies chuckling to himself.

“Will let it slip this time. Harry. What a nice name!”

“Is it what you thought about from the H?”

“It was one of my theories. The other one was Hayes, but Harry fits you better.”

“You haven’t even seen me, how do you know what name fits me?”

“I don’t know. You had a vibe. There are many great Harries in the world, you seemed to fit between them!”

Harry wonders if she is thinking about him without even knowing that… it is him. He wants to ask her, but decides not to. Instead, he is enjoying that he can now reach her immediately and not through a comment section. He never thought this would actually happen.

 The texts never stop. They have so much to talk about! Their entire life to share, millions of thoughts and so much to discuss! Harry is not proud of the time he has spent with his eyes glued to his phone, but he wouldn’t miss a chance to talk to her for anything. Their friends are not blind to the change in him, but Mitch is the only one with a guess about why he has gotten so addicted to his phone.

“Is it the girl from the videos?” he asks Harry one time when they are at the studio, having lunch break. Different food boxes are scattered around them, on the table and the couch. Harry’s phone just light up from a text and he immediately dropped his lunch to type a response.

He glances up at his friend with a shy smile nodding his head. He hasn’t talked about his newly funded friendship with Y/N yet, it feels like as if he tells it to anyone it might evaporate into just a dream.

“So you reached out, huh?”

“I did,” he nods returning to his food once his message is sent. “She’s great.”

“Does she know who she is talking to?” Harry’s lack of answer tells enough about the truth to Mitch. “You can’t hide forever, especially if you are planning on meeting her.”

“I know,” he answers shortly. “But I just don’t know how I could even bring it up to her without sounding like a mad man.”

“She’ll need proof.”

“M’not ready to show m’self to her. What if it changes everything?”

“Then it wasn’t worth it,” he simply tells him.

Deep down Harry knows it’s the truth, but he is not ready to be robbed from the joy she is bringing him. He has never felt such a deep connection to anyone before and they haven’t even met. It’s just a version of her he is seeing on the screen, not her real self. But it feels real to him and he wants to keep this reality to himself for just a little longer.

 “I wish I could hear your voice, Harry. You are one big mystery to me, you know that?”

He forgets to breathe for a moment as he reads her message, lying in bed one evening, getting ready to sleep, but he wanted to check in with her before ending the day.

“You know so much about me already,” he types back.

“Not enough, I feel like. Sometimes I’m afraid Nev and Max are about to show up at my door and tell me that I’ve been catfished.”

He chuckles at her words, though he completely understands her fear.

“What do you want from me then?”

“Send me a voice message so I know you are real. That would put my suspicion to sleep. For a while…”

Harry hesitates for a long time until he decides just one voice message couldn’t hurt. Just a short one where his voice is not that recognizable so his cover won’t be over immediately.

“Good night, Y/N,” he tells into his phone and then send the recording to her.

He watches the status change from delivered to read and a couple of minutes go by before she finally responds.

“Thank you. Now I know that you are real. I hope I’ll hear your voice in real life one day.”

“I hope that too.”

 His time spent undercover is coming to an end and he knows it’ll happen soon. It’s been weeks since they started chatting, almost an entire month and she’s been hinting her will to see his face and though he has been putting it off, he knows it has to happen.

Fate is playing under his hands, because he is traveling to Seattle for a few days, exactly when Y/N is traveling there to visit her parents.

“I hope you know you can’t leave without meeting finally,” she wrote when she found out they are going to be in the same city.

“It never even crossed my mind!” he wrote back chuckling to himself, however it brought him extreme anxiety that he is now going to be forced to come clean about who he really is.

He spends his whole flight to Seattle making up possible outcomes for their first official meeting. Not all of them end well and it’s just fueling his fear that he might lose her for not telling her the entire truth.

But she is a smart girl, she’ll see your reasoning, he tells himself, however he can’t entirely convince himself that it will be the case.

In hopes of squeezing in more than just one meeting into the weekend they agreed to meet almost first thing after he lands. So after checking into his hotel he heads into the city to finally meet her in real life in a local café she suggested for the occasion. Arriving to the place he is running a little late and she already texted him she’ll be waiting for him inside. Harry is wearing a beanie with shades to try to keep up his cover and it seems to be working, no one has approached him yet.

Stepping inside the cozy looking place his eyes roam around and immediately finds her sitting in the corner, pouring sugar into her coffee, not even paying attention to the door at the moment, but truth is she’s been intensely staring at it in the past ten minutes she has been there.

Harry takes a deep breath and nods to himself before heading in her way, hands shaking nervously as he stops at her table.

She glances up at him with innocent eyes, a smile spreads across her face as she sees that her mysterious Harry has arrived and she doesn’t recognize her until he finally takes his sunglasses off.

Harry watches her face turn from happiness to surprise then utter shock as she realizes who is standing in front of him.

“You are… my Harry?” she asks, confusion laced through her voice and Harry can’t ignore how she called him her Harry. He likes the ring of it.

“M’orry if it’s a little too much f’you, I really didn’t know how to tell ya.”

Keeping his eyes on her he pulls out the other chair at the table and takes a seat across her while she is still staring at him with a shocked and puzzled expression sitting on her face. Then she looks around in suspicion as he wiggles his coat off his arms, before her eyes settle on him once again.

“It’s not an episode of Catfish, right?” she asks making him chuckle.

“It is not, don’t worry.”

“I’m sorry if I’m being weird, but this was literally the last thing I was expecting,” she admits leaning back in her seat. “I believed things like this only happen in movies.”

“Not just there,” he smiles, slowly relieving that she is still sitting there and hasn’t ran out. It’s going way better than he expected.

She needs a little time to put the whole picture together and befriend the thought that she indeed just developed a friendship with Harry Styles through her videos for her brother. The absurdity is still shocking to her, but the more time passes by with him still sitting there, the more she finds peace with it.

Once the shock and surprise is gone they slowly realize they are seeing each other in real life finally. Harry feels overwhelmed, she is even more breathtaking than in her videos and through texts. He is mesmerized by her whole being and could listen to her talk in person forever, he wouldn’t get bored of her.

Time stops existing as they sit at the little café, talking for hours even though that’s all they’ve been doing through texts, but they just can’t get enough of hearing each other, seeing each other’s reaction and be able to see each other and not stare at a screen while talking.

Unfortunately, time never stopped just for the two of them and soon she realizes she needs to head back home. Harry doesn’t want to let go of her just yet so he offers to give her a ride, thanking himself for getting a rental for himself upon arriving. Y/N accepts the offer so the two of them head back to her parents’ home, soaking up the last minutes of their precious time spent together.

“Thank you for today, I really loved meeting you finally,” she smiles at him once they are parked on the driveway.

“I hope I didn’t shock you too much,” he chuckles scratching his chin.

“Just a little,” she admits before they both get out of the car and walking around it she stops in front of him, after a moment of hesitation she opts for a hug that he returns more than happily.

It feels as if her frame was perfectly sculpted to fit in his embrace and Harry can’t imagine how he could go this long without even seeing her in person. He knows it’s gonna be utter misery to be away from her after they leave the city.

“Will I see you before you take off?” she asks letting go of him. Harry looks down at her, the urge to kiss her growing bigger with each passing moment, but he is not sure if it would be appropriate to give it a try on their first time meeting.

“I’m free tomorrow for a lunch,” he tells her and she nods smiling.

“Then I’m free too,” she chuckles.

There’s an awkward moment where they are not sure what else should be done or said and the more they wait the weirder it’s getting so Harry clears his throat as he takes a step back, sad that he has to leave without feeling her lips on his, but he is not trying to be too greedy.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then,” he smiles walking back to his car. Y/N waves after him and sitting back to behind the wheel he takes a moment to himself to collect himself after everything that has happened today. His hands curl around the wheel and he is about to start the car when someone knocks on the window. Y/N is smiling at him through the glass and he rolls it down curiously.

“I just…” she starts hesitantly, her eyes wander down to his lips and Harry knows what’s about to happen, but it still catches him by surprise.

Y/N leans in through the window and presses her lips to Harry’s, capturing them in a sweet, long awaited first kiss they both have been dreaming of for quite a while. Harry smiles into the kiss, bringing his right hand up to cup her cheeks as they stretch the moment for as long as possible. Whenever one pulls back the other brings them back for just one more kiss that turns into two more, then three… It takes a long time for them to finally let go of each other.

“See you later, H,” she smiles backing out of the car and running up to the front door, smiling wildly as she waves in his way one last time before disappearing in the house.

 Lying in bed that evening Harry is scrolling through his Instagram feed when he finally realizes he can now follow her without a worry. He is quick to find her profile again and hit that follow button. He is happy to see she was already following him.

He is just about to put his phone aside and go to bed after such a busy but exciting day when a notification pops up on the screen.

Y/N has just uploaded a new video!

He taps on it quickly and her smiling face greets him from his phone’s screen.

“Hi Sammy! It’s me again. Welcome back to our channel,” she starts with a shy smile. The setting is new this time, he supposes it’s her parents’ home this time. “This is going to be a short video, but I wanted to tell you about something. Or someone.”

Harry’s heart skips a beat when he thinks about where it’s heading. He listens to her voice holding his breath.

“I met someone today. We’ve been talking for a while, but I could finally hug him today. His name is Harry, and he is a wonderful man. I think you two would get along well,” she says with a soft chuckle. “I love spending time with him and I hope he feels the same way. Actually…” Her eyes move up straight to the camera, something she doesn’t do often. She usually stares out the window or plays with Henry while talking. “I think he is watching it right now. Hi Harry!”

“Hello, Beautiful,” he greets her back with a smile as if she could hear him.

“I wanted to tell you how amazing you are making me feel. I hope I didn’t disappoint. I was so nervous to meet you today, I hope I lived up to what you imagined me to be.”

“You were so much better than that,” he answers again.

“Anyway… I hope you feel the same way. You are the first guy I’m talking about in an update, so appreciate it!” she tells him and he chuckles lightly. “I’ll see you soon, H. But until then… Know that I’m thinking about you.”

“M’thinking about you too, Angel.”

“Sammy, I miss you as always. I hope everything is well, can’t wait for your next email. I love you,” she smiles before the video ends.

Harry heads straight to the comments. This time he doesn’t leave a lengthy one, just a short line, but it has everything he wanted to tell her.

“I feel the same way.” The comment reads. Just a few seconds later comes the notification and he smiles sweetly at his phone.

Y/N liked the comment.

[pedro-pascal-love]

The Past

Chapter Four of Well, This is Awkward

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Rating: 18+, NSFW

Word Count: 2k+

Summary: Some things come to light about Reader’s past and Dave is a tease.

Warnings: Language, angst, slow burn, graphic descriptions of sexual acts but no sex (yet!)

⟸ Previous Chapter ❖ Next Chapter ⟹

A week. That’s how long you’d had been avoiding Dave at all costs. You made damn sure not to be caught alone with him whenever possible, always having one of the girls there or being out of the house running errands while the girls were at school. As far as you could tell, Dave was avoiding you too. Which you’d admit hurt your pride a little bit, but hey, he was married, so you had no right to be upset.

You’d tried to get your mind off him as much as you could by working on things around the house or helping the girls out with homework, but you could only do that so much before boredom overtook you. Whenever you weren’t busy with the girls or doing errands, you often hung out in your room on your phone or laptop, just scrolling through social media. You’d done your nails several times this week already and had perfected the art of folding your towels five different ways and rearranging your bedroom. Yeah, you weren’t going a little stir crazy at all. Carol was due back from her trip in a week, and you’d hoped to avoid Dave the rest of the time until then, but fate had other ideas.

It started like any other day; you’d gone to drop off the girls at school and then hidden away in your room. Two hours passed before you heard a peep from around the house, and it came in the form of a knock on your door. Your heart stopped; your breath hitched.

“Yes?” You called out, nerves consuming you in anticipation.

“It’s Dave, mind if I come in?” Dave replied through the door. You looked down at your clothes, contemplating if you should change or not. All that preserved your modesty was a pair of yoga pants and a tight-fitting tank top.

Fuck, you thought. You straightened yourself up and took a deep breath, putting a pillow on your lap under your laptop and took in a deep breath.

“Come in,” you stated, bracing yourself for his entry. Dave quickly opened the door, and it took everything in you to remain conscious. How would a man look so good in merely a dress shirt and trousers?! Dave made his way to you and sat on the foot of the bed while you scooted back a little bit more on the bed and propped yourself up against the headboard.

“What can I do for you today, Dave?” You inquired.

“I think you and I need to have a little chat,” Dave replied. You bit your lip.

Fuck, I do not like where this is going.

“What about? Is something wrong?” You replied nonchalantly.

“Yes. You’ve been avoiding me this last week, and I’d like to know why,” Dave stated, cutting right to the chase.

Fuck.

“Oh….Um….Well, you see….” You stammered out, not sure how to answer that without sounding like a complete idiot.

“I mean, I have a few guesses, but I wanted to hear it from you.” You sighed, hearing his words.

Here goes nothing.

“Yeah…..I have sort of been avoiding you, and I’m so sorry if it came off as rude,” you began. “It’s just; I’m not sure how to handle this situation.”

“What? The fact that you and I have fucked, and now you’re my children’s nanny?” Dave blatantly asked. You bit the inside of your cheek at his words, but his words didn’t stop there.

“The fact that I’ve had you bent over, with my cock deep in your soaking wet pussy, letting a stranger fuck you in a public place?” You clenched your thighs at his words, the action not going unnoticed by Dave, as his eyes shifted down to your legs covered up by the pillow. You gulped and nodded,  eyes downcast.

“I see…..Well, I guess I can only assume that you wanted to pretend like that never happened. However,” Dave paused. You lifted your eyes and met his gaze. “What if I don’t want to go on as if nothing happened?” You felt the fire in your soul flare. Were you really hearing his words? Dave got up and moved until he was sitting next to you on the bed, shutting your laptop, setting both the pillow and the computer down next to you.

“See, Princess, I kind of really liked how you felt around me. Feeling the tight walls of your pussy clench around me, milking me for every last drop.” The pet name made you bite your lip and fidget with your hands. You didn’t want to let his words affect you, but they were, and you felt yourself grow hot at the memories. You felt Dave place his hand under your chin and bring your face up to meet his stare. You hadn’t realized how close he was to you until that moment. Should either of you lean forward, just the smallest amount your lip would meet. You inwardly shuddered at the thought.

DAMMIT NO! You scolded yourself.

“Dave, you’re married!” You finally croaked out, snapping your head back so fast it almost hit the headboard. You watched wide-eyed as Dave threw his head back and laughed.

“That didn’t stop you before, baby girl,” he coolly replied. You felt your blood start to boil. He was married, and yet here he was acting like he wasn’t.

“I didn’t know you were married that night,” you shot back, crossing your arms.

“No, but you know now, and I can tell that you still want me,” Dave smirked.

Damn him.

You shook your head, adamant not to fall under his spell, but your willpower was waning.  Dave leaned in close to your ear. “C’mon, sweet girl, you’re going to resist, Daddy?”

“Dave….” you whined, your breath hitching feeling his breath on your ear. Dave smiled and moved your face to capture your lips with his. Heat engulfed your bodies as you moaned into the kiss, grabbing onto his shirt and pulling him closer to you. Dave took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, slipping his tongue into your mouth and battling for dominance. You whined as you felt him bite your lip and then pull away, your lips swelling from the interaction.

“That’s what I thought,” Dave said as he got up and walked out of the room, leaving you hot and bothered.

“Fuck!” You cursed out as you brought your fingers to your lips, feeling the ghost of his kiss. “I am so fucking screwed.”

Dave was annoyed, to say the least. You’d been avoiding him for the last week since your encounter in the hallway, and he’d had enough of it. He’d spent all week watching you on the cameras, watching as you touched yourself when nobody else was home, listening to your little whines and moans. He’d spent all week listening to you pant out his name, and he’d jerked himself off to the image of being there with you. He had begrudgingly given you space this last week and studied you. He wanted to know what made you tick and see if he’d be able to get away with the plans formulating in his mind.

Carol was due back in a week, and he damn well wanted to have you before his wife was back in town, and his chance at more fun would fly out the window. Today he would take what he wanted and tease you, even if it ended up with him getting blue balls in the process. Dave had chosen today when he knew you’d be caught off guard, and boy was he glad he’d done that. Your little make-out session in your bedroom was just the beginning, and he could tell that you’d eventually give in to him. He watched you on the security feed as you laid in bed, annoyed that he’d left so abruptly, and was pleasantly surprised when you picked up your phone to call your friend Melody. Dave got onto his computer and decided to tune in to your little conversation to see what you two were chatting about.

“Hello?” Mel answered.

“Mel, I’m so fucked,” you started. He could hear Mel on the other end of the phone laugh at your words.

“What happened?” she implored.

“Dave…..He…UGH. He needs to stop being so damn sexy!” you proclaimed. Dave smirked at your antics while Mel laughed.

“I mean, he looked fine as hell when you met him; you can’t just turn that kind of sex appeal off,” she replied. You groaned, and he watched on the screen as you slapped your forehead.

“I know! It’s so bad because I want to jump his bones. Like ALL THE TIME,” you said exasperatedly. “And I hate that he’s married, Mel. It’s so fucked. I don’t know how things in their marriage are like, but Carol seems like such a nice woman.” Dave’s ears perked up at the mention of his wife.

I wonder where this is going to go, he thought as he heard you sigh into the phone.

“I know. It’s pretty fucked that he slept with you that night at the bar, but at the same time, that wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know,” she consoled. “For all you know, they might have like an open marriage or some shit like that.”

“Yeah, who the fuck knows, man. But uh, you should probably know something…” You trailed off.

“Did you sleep with him?!” Mel exclaimed through the phone, both sounding concerned but also excited. "Girl, you know I wouldn’t judge you if you did, ‘cause hot damn, I’d love to be in your situation with a hot boss and all, but the whole Carol thing is just weird.”

“No, no, I didn’t sleep with him, but damn do I want to,” you replied with a laugh. “No, he just came into my room a bit ago, and fucking called me out on why I’d been avoiding him. AND THEN THE MOTHERFUCKER KISSED ME!!!” Dave could hear Mel gasp through the phone and then burst into laughter.

“Oh man, what?!”

“Yeah! He came in all serious and then was like, ‘Have you been avoiding me cuz we had sex?’ and he started fucking dirty talking, all like describing how it was when we were at the bar,” you continued.

“OH MY GOD. HOT DAMN GIRL! That’s some fucking Big Dick Energy if I ever,” Mel cackled. Dave shook his head. You girls were too much, and he liked your friend.

“I KNOW! And then he like got all close to me and just - ugh! I even called him out about how he’s married, and you know what he did? He fucking said that he knew I wanted him even after finding out he was married. It’s like he’s a goddamn spy or has eyes watching me or something!” Dave let out a chuckle at your words. Oh, if only you knew how close you were with that statement.

“Oh, man. That’s so hot,” Mel laughed.

“Yeah…But then the son of a bitch went and kissed me!” you said as you threw your head back with a groan. “And Mel, it was so fucking hot. Ugh. It seriously took everything not to rip his clothes off.”

“Oh my god!”

“I KNOW! And then the fucker had to be like ‘That’s what I thought,’ all sexy-like, and then he walked out!” You cried as you flung yourself into your bed while Mel cackled even more over the phone.

“Hot diggity damn, girl. I say you march into his office or room or wherever he is and take what you want. Better yet, tease the fucker back,” Mel suggested. You pondered her statement for a moment and grinned.

“Give him a taste of his own medicine? Fuck, I really should!”

“Do itttttttt,” Mel encouraged. “But you should be careful. Like maybe a little teasing and stuff, but until you figure out what’s going on with him and Carol, don’t cross that line, you know?”

“Yeah, good point. I don’t want to be a homewrecker, but like fuck, he makes it so hard,” you whined.

“I know, chicka, I know. Who knows, maybe he’d leave your wife for you,” she joked. “Wouldn’t that be a twist!” Dave quirked an eyebrow at her words.

I mean fuck, I never had that thought before, but the girls do love her, and we have a lot of chemistry that not even Carol and I had when we first got together, Dave thought to himself.

“Oh my god, Mel. Don’t say that! Dammit, I’m going to Hell,” you groaned out as you laughed.

“It’s ok; I’ll make sure to save you a seat!” “I feel like such a teenager right now, though, dude. Like I don’t know how I’m going to survive.”

“Take it one day at a time, but make sure to keep your head on straight. I’ll support you no matter what, you know that. If you want to pursue things with him and be happy, then go for it. Just make sure that you don’t get hurt in the long run, you know?” Mel said.

“I know, I don’t want to have to deal with another heartbreak. Especially after what happened with Tom,” you breathed into the phone with a sigh. Dave felt a ping in his heart. He knew all about your situation with your ex-boyfriend Tom and how badly that had ended. He knew all about the abuse that you’d been through at the hands of that asshole and had seen the police reports and photos of your battered face. Thankfully Tom was rotting away in prison, but only after he almost killed you. Dave felt his blood boil at the thought of someone hurting you.

“It’s going to be alright, girly,” Mel consoled. “I don’t think Dave is like Tom at all, and Tom is rotting away after what he did to you.”

“Yeah, I know….I’m just scared,” you whispered into the phone. “Anyways, I have to take a shower and run a few errands in a bit, so I’ll let you go.”

“Ok. You be careful, ok? And take care of yourself,” Mel said as you bid each other farewell and hung up. Dave watched you sit in bed for a moment and contemplated going into the room and comforting you but thought better of it.

I’m getting a little in too deep with her.

Shit.

⟸ Previous Chapter ❖ Next Chapter ⟹

[heliantyr]

ALRIGHT!

Time for questions! I’m going to put 1-9 here plain and simple, and then the rest will be under the break just so that you don’t have to scroll to oblivion if you don’t want to see this! Let’s go!

1: Name

     My name is Jude, or Coreta if you wanna use my pen name! A few of you might also know me as Virchude since that’s my main blog!

2: Age

    I won’t tell you plainly, but I am still in high school.

3: City that you live in

     I’m just gonna tell you which state! I live in the lower peninsula of Michigan!

4: What do most people not know about you?

     I’m almost certain that none of you know this, but I am the youngest of  my dad’s (kinda) six kids.

5:  What do most people know you for?

     If we’re talking just here, I hope to all get out it’s my headcanons, but in real life it’s the fact that I get offended rather easily...

6: Hobbies!

     I do a lot of pointless writing (meaning I never finish anything)... I also draw a lot of random junk, I rad a shit ton of fanfiction, I sing/write songs a lot... uuhh and do nothing.

7: What are your passions?

     I have a very large passion for helping those around me who have suffered like I have mentally and emotionally. I also really like debating (more like arguing) with people about politics!

8: When was the last time you had a significant conversation with someone you love?

     Just yesterday my mom, older sister, and I ended up accidentally sitting down in the living room and ranting about how shitty out lives are... so.......... yeah

9: have you collected anything? What is it?

     I have a small hat collection (that I hardly ever wear), and I’m beginning a plant collection! There is also a ever fluctuating collection of cups and bottles in my room T-T

10: List ten things off your bucket list (I may not remember half of these TvT)

*Take a trip back to Colorado with my friends

*Start a business

*Travel to at least 8 countries

*Go to Andorra

*Be known for some great feat

*Have one of my works (whether art or writing, etc) become famous or greatly known

*Meet one of my favorite actors/band members (doesn’t matter who)

*Learn to swim...............

*Make drastic strides towards saving the planet

*Meet more people from my dad’s side of the family

11: What was the last thing you learned?

     Seeing as I got out of world history an hour and a half ago, we learned about the Cold War and how the USSR fell apart because of silly putty

12: How many relationships have you been in?

     Counting the ones that didn’t mean shit, 4. Only counting the ones that actually meant something, 2.

13 + 14 I am not answering.

15: Favorite food

     Menudo. Fuckin love it

16: Favorite drink

     hm... either tea or ginger ale, but out of a shot glass TvT A TWO LETER OUT OF A SHOT GLASS

17: What is the best birthday gift you have ever received?

     I went to NYC over my birthday weekend this year with my school’s choir, and our tour leader on my bus got me a pastry in Little Italy! It meant so much because I didn’t even know her! 

18: Are you optimistic or pessimistic?

     I’m usually pessimistic unless my friends are also being pessimistic, cuz then I’m frigin sunshine and rainbows!

19: Do you sleep during class?

     Not very often, and only if what I’m doing isn’t actually important.

20: What is the most expensive thing you own?

     If not my actual bed, my laptop, which is $200.

21: What is the cheapest yet most useful thing you own?

     ..... I... Don’t know... uh I got a huge fukin thing of cocoa butter lotion at the dollar tree... and it’s kind of multi use?!?

22: How many time a day on average to you check your phone?

     .........don’t look at me like that.

23: Text or call?

     Text. I wanna call people, but what if they don’t pick up? Or it’s really awkward? or I can’t hear them? or vise versa? or-

24: Opinion on long distance?

     Sounds like torture. I honestly couldn’t do it.

25: What is your definition of success?

     Feeling satisfied or content with what you’ve done.

26: Favorite song?

     um. At the moment, Killer Queen by Queen.

27: Favorite artist?

     Music wise, Patrick Stump. Art wise, Van Gogh.

28: Celebrity crush/crushes?

     That’s a long list. But my main two recently have been Sebastian Stan and Tom Holland...

29: When was the last time you read for fun?

     Aside from fanfiction? Last Wednesday night I stayed up reading Shakespeare’s sonnets to myself...

30: Favorite flower?

     chrysanthemums!

31: What is the best gift you could receive right now?

     A confidence boost that lasted at least the rest of high school...

32: Any guilty pleasures?

     Day dreaming about random shit.... random weird shit about people I know...

33: What is one thing you’d like to change about yourself?

     Hm... I think I’d change my mental health. I just wanna be perfectly okay for once.

34: What do you search for in a friend?

     being able to understand me, relate to me, and be weird with me. Also mutual interests. And reasonable barriers.

35: How many times have I said “I love you” in the past month?

     You expect me you count???? A shit ton! Do you know how many times a day I have a family member leave the goddamn house????

36: Where dd you last go other than your room/home?

     School.

37: Why do good things happen to good people?

     Because that’s not how life works. Our society constantly has people suffering, no matter who they are or what they’ve done.

38: In your opinion, what hurts more? Being left out, or being stabbed in the eye?

     Seeing as I’m just about used to the pain of being left out, I’d say being stabbed in the eye. I am such a wuss T-T

39: How many green shirts do you own?

     1. It’s a St. Patty’s day shirt.

40: Do you like anime?

     noooooooooooo.......... not at allllll.... TvT I’m tired!

41: What do you invest the most time in?

     Either videogames or fanfiction.

42: What is the name of the last book you read?

     The Hobbit (even though I haven’t finished yet)

43: What’s the difference between loving and liking someone?

     No clue... Still trying to figure that out.

44: Where are you most productive?

     My art classroom

45: List three things you enjoy doing with friends:

*Complaining about life

*being gay

*Pretend to kidnap one of them my dragging them around the floor during lunch

46: List three things you like to do alone:

*Listen to music

*Think

*Read

47: Do you think that world peace will ever exist?

     As long as there are living things on it? Never.

48: Do you have any allergies?

     Absolutely none! I knew this kid in the third grade who was allergic to nuts, milk, AND gluten!

49: When was the last time you cussed at someone?

     My friend and I got into an argument about who the best actors are during english....

50: What was the last promise you made?

     .......Is it bad that I don’t remember?

51: What was your last dream about?

     I had a hedgehog (which I really frikin want), and I was taking care of them, and hen this asshole in my grade was in my living room and I had to be nice to him.

52: If you won a trip to Hawaii and could take 5 people with you, who would they be? 

*My best friend Kiara

*My friend Raph

*My other friend Molly

*My other other friend Faith

*My dog

53: How many countries have you visited?

     1, if you count the fact that I live in one!

54: What is your favorite medium of art?

     Music. It moves me so easily.

55: When was the last time someone complimented you?

     My friend Laura jokingly complimented my hair during english (we were looking at old english compliments) and she winked at me TyT

56: If you switched bodies with someone, how would you recognize yourself?

     uh... hol up, wha? 

57: Do you consider yourself mature?

     At times, yes.

58: How many days in your life do you think you’ve wasted on tumblr?

     so frigin many, but there’s more to come!!!!

59: What is your favorite quote?

     “I was so good at sports when I was in high school, that I started a band.”

                                      -Patrick Stump

60:  If you started a new religion and you had to create 3 rules or commandments for your new followers to live by, what would those 3 rules be?

*Be kind to all (see how that’s turned out???)

*Spend life learning. Try to find the lesson in your experiences.

*Mental growth is more important than anything

61: What is your greatest accomplishment?

     Being alive today.

62: Do you believe in the death penalty?

     No, not really.

63: What are your goals in life?

     To be a better person than my mother is, and to help others on a mental level.

64: What do you think your soulmate is doing right now?

     I honestly have no clue... maybe something weird?

65:  If you could live anywhere, where would you live? The place can be in an imaginary, fantasy, or the real world.

     I would have to go with.......... oo that’s hard................... the bnha universe      T-T I want powers!

66: What were you like in 2013? 

     I was an awkward, abusive, shitty little child.

67: Do you have a job?

     Nope! I’m planning on possibly finding a part-time one soon, though!

68: Tell us a story about your childhood best friend.

     His name was Parker, and he was a year older than me. He was my first friend other than my older sister, and I loved him so much. I don’t remember much, seeing as the last time I saw him I was five... It was early fall, just when the leaves start to fall. We had one of those trees in my front year that dropped the seed thingies that twirled around. Parker and I would always toss so many of those in the air until out hands got cold... I really miss him.

69: If you could change one thing in society, what would it be?

     I would get rid of corrupt governments and people in positions of power.

70: How many all-nighters have you pulled before?

     Never have I pulled one for school, but I find myself staying up til the crack of dawn the day before school starts, usually. Or on nights when I can’t but help contemplate everything to the point of not being able to sleep at all.

71: Is tumblr your favorite website? If not, then what is it?

     Tumblr is one of my favorites, but Ao3 has my ass.

72: What is the craziest thing you would do for a million dollars?

     Nothing. I tend to be very hard to bribe. But if I reaaallly needed the money, I wouldn’t be able to kill someone, I’ll tell you that.

73: Does money equal happiness?

     It can for some people, but not for all.

74: How many times have you experienced true happiness in your lifetime?

     I don’t know, a few? I’m never truly happy until my thoughts leave me alone. 

75: How many times have you experienced true sadness in your lifetime?

     More than happy, I can tell you that.

76: What’s the funniest joke you have ever been told?

     My generation is going to save the planet.

77: When was the last time you looked at the news?

     We actually watched a news clip during history today!

78: If you could say one thing to the world, what would you say?

     Stop being a dick!

79: What is your favorite animal?

     A hedgehog!! 

80: If you could earn a million dollars for pretending to be dead for three years, would you do it?

     NO! I have people who would miss my sorry ass, then murder me for coming back!

81: What is one thing everyone is bad at?

     Having a lot of friends. A lot of the time (in my personal experience), the more friends you have, the less time you can spend with them, and the less close you are, until eventually you can’t keep dividing your time!

82: What time do you normally sleep? How many hours do you usually get? 

     uuuhh... yes, and not enough!

83: Does age necessarily equal maturity?

     No, but that does not excuse digusting things like p*****ilia.

84: What is your favorite clothing store? 

     ....The Hot Topical.

85: In the winter- beanies or gloves?

     why not both?!?!?!?

86: Would you rather have wings or a fish tail?

     Wings. I can’t swim, and I panic underwater.

87: If you had the power to erase someone from the world so that nobody remembered them but you, would you do it?

     That depends, does it fuck up history? Cuz in that case, no!

88: What do you fear the most?

     Being abandoned by everyone.

89: How many digits of pi can you recite?

     3...

90: If you could travel back to one year and relive it again, what year would it be?

     2015, so I could leave a better version of my for my friends that I leave at the end of the year,

91: Describe yourself in one word.

     Invasive

92: Describe your last victory.

     I had a conversation with that asshole from my dream without arguing with him.

93: What is the weirdest thing you have ever seen?

     SO! This one time towards the end of the school day in the seventh grade. This one kid (let’s call him V) was sitting next to his friend (C). I look over as I go to shoulder my bag, and V is running his hand down C’s thigh. V catches me looking, and goes “WHAT?! he did it first!” like that made it better! (and it kinda did because that’s still one of my best stories!)

94: What is something you will never forget?

     Something traumatic

95: Would you rather forget all of the past, or remember everything in vivid detail?

     Vivid detail. Then maybe I could win arguments with my sister!

96: Have you ever broken a bone before?

     yeah... I fractured the growth plate in my foot in the sixth grade... by walking.....

97: Is it harder love someone, or hate someone?

     love is so hard....

98: Coffee or tea?

I drink both, but tea ftw!

99: What are some little things you do that have changed your life in a positive way?

     I have become more friendly with my dog, and he actually likes me now!

100: How many hours do spend on tumblr a day?

     quite a fukin few....

[teamkaiforever]

BETWEEN YOU AND ME

(requested by anon)

Kai Parker x Reader word count: 4 771 / reading time: 17 minutes warnings: mentions of smut (?!) is that even a warning? idk but just to be safe. summary: Mystic Falls is under attack; Kai and Reader are keeping a secret from her friends, though secrets have a way of coming out. *gif by me ________________________________________

Y/N dragged her feet across the floor, left her coffee mug on the desk next to her laptop and glanced at her boyfriend who was currently asleep in their bed. It was barely 6am, the first sunrays were seeping through the semi-closed curtains but none of it seemed to catch her attention. No. That was all Kai, who barely had a sheet covering his bare naked body. There were spots of blood on the pillow and a couple of other places as they had ‘wrestled’ the night before which would be nightmare to clean but none of it bothered her. Instead, just before she pulled her chair to sit down and give her history assignment one last look before sending it in, she tiptoed as quietly as she could and bent over him. Her fingers ran though his messy hair for a moment, her lips touched his briefly and almost instantly he returned the kiss. Before she knew what was happening, Kai had grabbed her and tossed her under him on the bed. His body pressed against hers firmly while their fingers intertwined on either side of her head and he continued to kiss her as if he was starving. For all she knew, he was. It was just how her life with him was. They had gone for not being able to stand each other to not being able to stand being away from each other in a couple of months. Though their romance was still a forbidden love because if her friends caught up on what she had been up to, or the real reason why Kai had softened up the past few months… things would not end well for any of them.

   “Kai—“ she barely managed to whisper, instantly getting lost in his eyes. His lips curled up into a wide smile and he brushed his nose against hers for a second before kissing her briefly again. Y/N used his momentary distraction and rolled on top of him. “Slow down –“

   “Not possible.” he grinned, intertwining his fingers with hers while she held his hands against the soft pillows. “You know, you look so fucking hot in my t-shirt. I’ll never get over it –“

Y/N shook her head smiling. “Yeah, well. You have the best t-shirts. So soft and they smell so nice. Mine are awful. Awful…”

Kai laughed under his breath, sitting up in the bed while her hands hooked around his neck and his slid down her waist. “Why are you up so early?”

   “Cuz –“ she tried to pull away from him but he wouldn’t let her. “—I got school work to finish. You know, some of us are still in high school.” she pushed his hands off her and got to the desk, taking a sip from her coffee as she leaned in against it. Kai braced himself on his elbows, his eyes remained focused on her the entire time, following every curve of her body and something told her he knew she was not wearing underwear… “And because there is a crisis. Remember? Cade? Katherine? Sirens –“

   “And you know I want you as far away from this as possible. It’s not safe –”

Y/N ran her fingers through her hair, folding her hands on her chest right after. A long moment passed in silence and Kai’s eyes pierced into hers. Keeping things from him was her least favorite thing to do, mostly because her boyfriend caught up with her lies and secrets pretty quick. And whenever she didn’t spill the beans on her own, he had his own way of torturing the truth out of her. “That’s kind of hard to do when Sybil is my new history teacher –“

   “What?!” Kai jumped up from the bed. Her gaze instantly drifted down south towards his semi hard lenght. Damn, what wouldn’t she do to freeze time and spend a few decades all alone with Kai. Just the two of them, skin to skin; travelling across the world and just being happy without worrying about any of this. “Why haven’t you told me this before? No, you are not going anywhere today.”

Y/N bit her lip, placing her hand on Kai’s chest while trying not to think what would happen if she were to stay there with him all day long. “I can’t hide. That’s not me and you know it.”

   “It’s too dangerous –”

   “You are out there.” she placed her hands on his shoulders, unconsciously feeling his biceps. Damn, she bit her lip. “You think I don’t worry 24/7 about you? My own friends want you dead –”

   “I can take care of myself and that’s different. You are a human, I’m a heretic.” he argued. “I can easily take all your friends down with a flick of my wrist. Sybil and her weirdo babysitter sis too.”

   “Or she can siren you to –”

   “To what?” he tried to meet her eyes but she kept avoiding his gaze up until the point she tried to push him away. “Y/N?”

Her gaze met with his. “You know what she did to Damon. I don’t – I don’t know what I’d do if she messes with your head and –” her eyes watered a bit and she wiped her nose with the back of her wrist. “Kai, it’s too dangerous not only for me to go out there –”

Kai gripped her wrists and pinned them behind her back, leaning towards her. “You are the most important person in my life, Y/N. Sybil cannot erase you from my head, or my heart or my soul. You are seared on them for good and nothing’s going to change that. Ever.” he gazed longingly into her eyes. “You are my everything… I love you more than you could possibly imagine but you should’ve told me about Sybil. I am your boyfriend –“

 “No.”

 “Excuse me?”

 “You are not my boyfriend.” Her eyes remained focused on his, watching the nervousness grow in them. “You are my soulmate, the love of my life –“ his lips crashed against hers in an instant and she could feel his length rub against her inner thigh. So close, but so far away. “—Kai –“ she took a shallow breath, keeping her eyes closed for a moment longer remembering the feeling of his lips on hers. “I’m gonna be late –“

  “For where?” he nibbled on her earlobe. “The bed is in no hurry, neither is the desk, nor is the wall. I’m going to be your private tutor for the day because there is no way I am letting you out of my sight until this is all over. That’s an order. You do what I say when I say it –”

Y/N’s lips curled up into a smile. “So over protective, and so so fucking hot when you get so bossy. Makes me think all those naughty things –”

Kai’s expression changed between grin and a serious look within seconds. “Oh? No, no. S-stop it with the googly eyes and the lip biting or the first lesson today will be a disciplinary one.”

Y/N raised her eyebrows. “Awh but daddy, if we stay home I will have to be tied up. Otherwise I’d crawl over the desk to my smocking hot teacher and spend the rest of the day learning new high notes in which I can moan his name –”

Kai shook his head interrupted her with a kiss. His mind had been drifting away since the second he had woken up shortly before she had ‘woken’ him up, and a part of him really wanted them to stay at her place and spend the day ‘studying’. The other knew he cannot miss the strategy session at the boarding house –

   “Alright, alright, I am not going to school today.” she muttered, feeling a little out of breath. Kai almost sighed in relief when he noticed her expression flash with something he couldn’t pick up on. There was something else he didn’t know, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. “I am crashing the strategy session at the Salvatore house.”

 “You are?” he grinned. “So, you mean to tell me I get to spend the entire day with you?”

 “Yes –“ she pushed him off her and headed towards the walk in closet. “—and no. You can’t make those eyes at me. You can’t look at me like that and get my heart racing as if I’ve been running a marathon –“

  “Can’t I?” he braced himself against the door, taking in every inch of her body as she got dressed. Y/N grabbed her black ripped in the knees skinny jeans but he shook his head. “Short black skirt? P-please? No underwear… F-for me?” She shook her head smiling and grabbed the skirt instead along with a slightly puffy white buttoned up shirt, getting dressed as quickly as she could. “Perfect.”

Y/N bent over to put on her ankle high Converses. “Kai, I am serious. You can’t let your wondering hands go places. You can’t make comments and you definitely can’t –” she looked up at him, but he had a spaced out look in his eyes. “Malachai!”

  “What?” he said innocently. “Just enjoying the view –“ he caught his t-shirt just as she threw it at him. “I know, I know. A house full of vampires. Gotcha. I’ll behave, promise.” he put the t-shirt on and whooshed himself around the room to get dressed. “I’ll go pack your lunch. Be back in a jiffy –“

Y/N shook her head smiling, fixed her hair and grabbed her laptop before putting it in her back and taking Kai’s phone and hers from the night stand. Her mind spun around at the thought how Kai would be right there by her side all day, struggling to control himself while she would be fighting herself not to steal a heart-eyes glance or get a little taste of his lips, however brief it might be.  Something told her if someone was gonna crack it would be her, though who could blame her.

   “Focus Y/N –“ she muttered to herself, walking in the small kitchen/living room where Kai was already done packing her lunch and two to-go coffee cups. “What are you going to eat?”

Kai spun around and in a flash had her pinned against the doorframe. “You –“ he brushed his fingertips against her cheek, tilting her chin up before his lips collided with hers. His body pressed against hers and for a moment she forgot how to breathe… and whose air she was breathing in the brief seconds she managed to get some air. “Just one –“ he whispered before kissing her again. “—one more kiss.”

  “S-stop –“ she tried to push him off but her heart just wasn’t in it. “Kai, you want to leave me breathless before we leave so you have to give me mouth to mouth every spare second we get alone at the boarding house, don’t you?”

  “No.” he shook his head, his lips curling into a wide smile. “Yes, yes. Okay. You got me addicted to your lips and everything about you. I need you in my bloodstream asap or I might die –“

Y/N gripped his shirt and pulled him down for another kiss before pushing him off her. Quickly she tiptoed to the counter to grab her coffee and lunch bag when she felt him playfully slap her ass. “Hands to yourself.” she scolded him. “No puppy eyes, no quivering lip –“

   “Fine, fine.” he sighed. “Let me just grab my phone and we’ll –“ Y/N pulled his phone from her bag. “You think you are so smart, don’t you?” Y/N shrugged her shoulders, passed him his phone and walked out the door without saying a word, heading towards the elevator with him at her tail. They stood in silence while waiting for the doors to open, stealing glances at the other as usual whenever they were in public.  “So do we carpool or –“

  “Sure, why not.” she took a shallow breath, meeting his eyes. “Saving the planet is always on the agenda, but remember –“ the elevator’s bell interrupted her. Kai gave her a slight nod and they walked in. As soon as the doors closed and it was just the two of them, Kai’s lips and hands were all over her making her forget whose air she was breathing… until the doors opened again and he pulled away as if nothing had happened.  Y/N stared at him and took a shallow breath. “We keep us between you and me. We ran into each other on the way there.”

   “Gotcha –“ Kai smiled innocently at her, holding out the building door for her.

It took them less than 20 minutes to get to the boarding house, all the while during the car ride he wouldn’t let go off her hand. His gaze barely left her during the entire ride and on the few occasions the red light stopped them, he used his opportunity to steal a kiss or two. Though the closer they got to the Salvatore house, the harder things got and by the time he parked the car in front of the house their act had started. Who knew who might be watching out the windows. Y/N ran her fingers through her hair, lifting herself on her toes for a moment to check if there was someone in the living room and rang the bell. Kai stood awkwardly next to her, taking a step away when he heard someone coming towards the door.

   “Hey, Y/N –“ smiled Caroline, opening the door. Y/N smiled her friend, whose smile faded away quickly when she saw Kai was there. “Are you stalking her or something? You keep showing up everywhere she is –“

Kai walked inside without waiting for an invitation. “Relax Clarisse. I ran into her on her way to the Grill. Isn’t your motto ‘All hands on deck.’ No, wait. It was ‘Protect the humans in Mystic Falls’ or something?” he glanced at Y/N, who rolled her eyes and made her way to the sofa. “Can’t let our golden girl die before graduation right?”

   “We don’t have a motto.” Caroline closed the door, taking a step towards them. Kai poured himself two fingers bourbon and sat on the opposite end of sofa, though his eyes kept drifting towards his girl. “I’ll go get Damon, you stay away from her –“

Kai raised his hands in defence while Y/N pulled her laptop onto her lap and glanced at her friend. “No rush. I have to proof read this history paper for the –“

  “—history teacher from Hell?” interrupted Kai. Y/N pursued her lips to try and hide her smile before glaring at him. “Sorry –“

  “Whatever Sybil is up to at the high school, grades come first. Whitmore or Harvard or Cambridge – they won’t care about the Devil and his minions being let loose on Earth and me being in the middle of it.” muttered Y/N, her gaze drifting towards Caroline who was almost out of the living room in that moment. “Cannot get into law if my grades are flunking –“ she winked at Kai, who scooted a little closer to her. Her finger pressed the power button on the laptop and she mouthed at him ‘Stop looking at me like that.’, glancing back at the screen.

Kai grinned at her and took a sip of his drink, watching her eyes widen the second she glanced at the screen a moment before she closed the lid. “Everything okay?”

Y/N stared at him and turned her laptop towards him, opening the lid before making sure she couldn’t hear footsteps. Not that it mattered seeing how her friends could move faster than the light. “What is this?” she said in a hushed voice, pointing at her desktop wallpaper where instead of a picture of the waterfall near by the Wickery Bridge where was her and Kai’s secret make out spot out of the way, was currently a picture of a shirtless Kai in her bed with barely any fabric covering his –

   “That’s me.” he smiled innocently at her, though his eyes sparkled with fire and mischief. “You like it?

    “I know it’s you—“ she shook her head unsure of she should smile at him, kiss him or slap him for his little surprise. “—but how it got here?”

Kai scooted towards her, whispering in her ear. “I wanted to surprise you when you opened your laptop in the morning. I had no idea you’d end up coming with me here –“

  “Color me surprised.” she pecked his lips. “And to answer your question – I love it. But if I had been at school – you could’ve sent me to the principal’s office. Detention doesn’t look good on college applications.”

Kai grinned at her. “As if I’d let that be a permanent mark in your file.” he leaned in closer. “Chocolate –“ he whispered in her ear. “How do you always smell like chocolate? It’s driving me nuts –“ Y/N turned her head sideways when he whooshed himself away. Her gaze drifted away and as soon as her friends popped up, she slammed her laptop shut. “Damon –“

Caroline glanced between her and Kai. “Everything okay? How’s your paper?”

Y/N looked up confused. “What?”

  “The history paper for the teacher from Hell?” Damon waved his hands before her eyes. “It was such a big deal you had Stefan wrapped up into helping you. It better be good –“

  “Oh, it’s – hot like a supernova. Definitely gonna bang that one later –“ Y/N muttered, catching Kai’s amused look for a second. “Ace it, I mean.” smiled Y/N, putting her laptop back in her bag. “You know me. I am never the one in trouble –“ her glance drifted towards Kai for a split second. “—though someone else is.”

Damon and Caroline glanced at each other and then at Kai and Y/N. “Who?”

   “Sybil.” stated Y/N, glancing at her friends. “Who else?”

Damon poured himself a drink. “Yeah well, after what she almost pulled yesterday our little siren is lucky I haven’t ripped her head off for hurting my favorite little Gilbert.”

Kai glanced at Damon and then at his girl who kept avoiding his glance and somehow found a way to scoot away from him even further on the sofa. “After she pulled what yesterday?” his eyes remained fixed on Y/N. “What happened?”

Y/N brought her knees up to her chest. “Nothing –“

   “I wouldn’t call you almost getting barbecued to the stake like a Salem witch nothing but –“ Damon muttered. Kai’s eyes widened and Y/N jumped up from her seat, taking Damon’s glass from his hand. “Be my guest –“

Kai jumped up right after here. “That’s why you were covered in dirt and ash last night—“ he muttered to himself, gripping her wrist. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

   “Cuz I knew you’d freak.” she yanked her wrist back while Damon stood between them confused. “Plus, I wasn’t hurt –“

   “You weren’t hurt?!” Kai exclaimed. “You could’ve died!!” Caroline and Damon glanced at each other while Y/N ran away from Kai and he kept going after her. “Don’t walk away from me.”

   “I have legs, I can and will walk away –“ she said in a hushed voice. “—because we are not having this conversation here.”

Caroline stepped towards them. “What’s going on?” she turned towards Damon who shrugged his shoulders, squinting his eyes a little. “Why is he so upset?”

    “I don’t know and I don’t like it.” Damon muttered watching Kai and Y/N have a silent starring contest. “You don’t think they –“

   “No, no way.” Caroline’s eyes widened. “Not after he put her sister into a magical coma.”

Y/N ran her fingers through her hair. “Malachai, please –“

Kai shook his head. “You kept this from me. I thought we were done doing that.”

She tried to touch him but he pulled away. “I’m sorry.”

   “You – you are sorry?” he gripped her hand and put it on his chest completely forgetting where they were. “Feel this? The air is being pulled out of my lungs and my heart being slowly torn right out of my chest, by you. Do you even realize what even the thought of me losing you is doing to me?”

Y/N shot him a warning glance but he didn’t seem to care they were in the middle of the Salvatore living room and her friends were there. Not only that but Bonnie just walked in with Matt. “Behave. Keep us between you and me. That’s all I asked.”

   “Doesn’t apply to your safety.” he tucked in a strand of hair behind her ear. “This comes above all else—“

Damon grabbed Kai’s wrist and yanked him back, then turned towards Y/N. “Explain. Now. You got five seconds before he loses his head.”

   “What’s going on here?” Bonnie wondered, dropping her jacket on the sofa. Matt raised his eyebrows, glancing at Kai and Y/N who pushed her way past Damon and took her boyfriend’s hand in hers. “Why are you two holding hands?”

   “Kai and I –“ she glanced at him and sighed. “Last night after the whole incident I went to the Grill to get a drink and ran into Kai. He took me home and… that’s it.”

   “That’s it?” Damon shrugged his shoulders. “What was he talking about then saying –“

   “We kissed.” Kai protectively pushed Y/N a little behind him. 

  “What?!” Bonnie, Caroline, Matt and Damon exclaimed in unison.

 Damon growled.”I’m gonna rip his head off –”

   “I kissed her… because I like her and she likes me. I know you don’t like it or me especially after everything I’ve done. I deserve that, I am not a good person and I own that. But being with her these past few months… It’s something. And under other circumstances this warm and fuzzy feeling I get whenever I’m around her would be absolutely revolting to me, but I love it more than anything.” he sighed, gazing lovingly at her. “I love her –”

Damon started laughing and for a few moments it all seemed perfectly fine up until the point he pushed Kai ten feet away and turned towards Y/N. “Have you lost your mind? You want a boyfriend, I will find you a boyfriend. How about that boy who took you to prom a few months back –“

   “Who? Jake? Y-you know Kai is the one who actually took me to prom and I made Jake up, right?” she said quietly. Damon’s eyes widened and he grabbed her shoulders, pinning her to the wall. Caroline rushed towards them but Kai was faster and pushed Damon off Y/N. “Jesus –“

     “Nope. Just me.” Kai grinned. Y/N mouthed ‘Shut up’.

Caroline pulled Damon back. “Let her explain. Might not be what we think.” she glanced at Bonnie who was currently pouring herself a drink, clearly having a hard time taking in what was happening. “Y/N might be the youngest of all of us, but don’t forget who was the one who outsmarted Katherine –“

    “Youngest, best-est, brightest… Hottest. –” grinned Kai, completely avoiding everyone’s looks. He only had eyes for his girl and her cheeks burned red at his words. “My girl–”

Damon groaned while Caroline closed her eyes, pressing her lips together trying not to comment on Kai’s words. “Tell me you are on vervain –” the vampire asked.

    “You think Kai compelled me to love him?! Are you insane?! You wanna know the truth? Here it is – ” Y/N said, holding tightly onto Kai’s hand. “You vanished, Damon! You and Enzo. Elena was in a sleeping curse, Jeremy is God knows where and everyone was busy looking for you. I lost everything and everyone in a blink of an eye because of Sybil… Except Kai, who was there every time I was alone at the Grill, or when I needed someone to talk to who didn’t mind listening to me ramble for hours. Kai who made sure I got home safely every night and kept me safe from all those guys who kept getting too handsy.”

Kai poked her in the stomach. “Awh, don’t skip on the best part. The first night I followed her home to make sure she got there safely and my little fireball here pulled a knife on me.” he grinned. “I swear I’ve never been more arous—“ he cleared his throat. Everyone except Y/N almost collectively groaned at his words. “—ed than when she gripped my hand behind my back and shoved me face-first against the door, and then put the blade under my chin and tilted my head towards her. Something happened when our eyes met and I just… knew it was her I had been looking for all my life without realizing it.”

    “Awwhh –“ she hugged him with one arm, both of them looking at each other with heart eyes. “You never told me that.”

    “So what?” Bonnie snapped. “Just because he acted like a decent human being for once, you decided he is a good boyfriend material? He is a murderer!”

Y/N sighed quietly and stared at her friends as if to say ‘Really? You are going with that one?’ “He is the man I love –“ she stated, feeling Kai squeeze her hand for a moment before he leaned in towards her, inhaling her scent. Damon growled. “I know you all have complicated history with him, but the Kai I know is not the Kai you see. He is not the same person he was back when he came out of 1994 –”

    “Yes, we remember he turned from an evil caterpillar into a slightly less evil butterfly –” interrupted Damon with his usual snark. “But he still is who he is –”

    “He is not the person he was after 1903 where you left him –“

    “To protect Jo and everyone else!” Bonnie took a step towards her. “He killed his entire family –“

    “And whose fault is that?” Kai said. Y/N kicked him in the shin. “I am just saying, I never would’ve –“

Bonnie shot him a glare that made Y/N’s blood freeze and the second she saw her friend’s hand shoot up, she stood between them. “There is nothing you can do or say to change that. I am old enough to live on my own, old enough to make my own decisions. You hurt him, you hurt me.”

Kai grinned and wrapped his hands around her from behind. “My girl. So fiery.” He pulled her up a little until her feet kicked at the air and he heard her laugh. “Love it.” he kissed her cheek as he let her feet back on the ground. “Love you –“

     “I love you too –“

Damon groaned. “Ugh… my ears are bleeding.” Y/N rolled her eyes and took a step towards him, wrapping her arms around him. There was one thing Damon couldn’t resist – her hugs. Perhaps because in a way it made him feel close to Elena again, or maybe he just didn’t want to break little Gilbert’s heart. “You have lost it. Positively and when you end up dead, and you will, just make sure Elena knows I was against it and tried to make you see reason.”

    “You can’t be okay with this?” Bonnie protested. “What if –?”

    “I’d never hurt her.” Kai said quietly, glancing at every single of his girl’s friends. “I’d die before that happens or before I let anyone else hurt her. I’d gladly sacrifice my life to keep her safe.” He caught Damon’s gaze. “You know I’m telling the truth. You might not trust me about anything else, but trust me about this –“

Damon groaned wrapping his arms around her, studying Kai’s face. “Just… no more kissing and googly eyes and the L word mention around us, okay?” he kissed her head. “Or I might forget and just rip his head off for even daring to breathe the air around you.”

Y/N pulled away with a smile on her face. “Thank you.”

Kai leaned in to whisper in her ear. “What did Sybil do when she messed with his mind? We might need to send her a ‘thank you’ card.”

    “Only thing keeping me from killing you right now is because Elena would never forgive me if I killed her little sister’s… whatever he is, even if he is the one who put her in a coma.” muttered Damon. “Don’t push it.”

________________________________________ MASTERLIST- SMUT ‘17 MASTERLIST- FLUFF ‘17 / MASTERLIST - FLUFF/ANGST ‘18

[rottenrainbowbabe]

Pink Prophecy

(Hey! I wrote the first chapter of my filthy frank fan fiction. It takes place before the release of the pink season album and the chin chin vs. frank fight. Please enjoy! Sorry if there was any grammar mistakes I might of missed. Thank you if you are reading!)

Introduction -

The prophecy states that a Lycra creature will become a warrior that will be the savior and protector of the universe. The civilians respectfully adress him as “ピンクの戦士 (pink warrior)” and have faith in him to restore normalcy in their lives ever since a self proclaimed god has ruined the lives of many innocent people. A false black lycra god by the name of Chin Chin. Chin Chin has become notorious for stealing chromosomes from civilians and demanding sacrifices in a greedy amount in order for his powers to grow. He enforces people to worship him as the one and only god of the omniverse. However, He who does not follow the commands of Chin Chin will suffer punishment for their disobedience and ‘traitorous actions’. Injustice and chaos have spread across realms, all because of the greedy and wicked Chin Chin. Who and where is the champion that the world needs? Who could bring back peace to the universe?

Chapter 1 - “Wow, people really want this album, right?” A raspy voice spoke up, looking over at his pink “friend”. Frank pushed up his sunglasses as he stood over pink guy, who was looking over at how hyped up pink season was all over the internet. “Well i gotta hand it you Pink guy, it seems like your music is pretty powerful…” he patted the pink creature on the head. Pink guy faked a smiled, pretending to appreciate the gesture. Pink guy wished that the hand patting him was actually from the real deal. He knew that this Frank was a phony, set up by the dark lord himself into tricking the filthy frank viewers into thinking that everything was ok. He had to play along so fake Frank wouldn’t become suspicious and snitch out Pink guy and his other friends to Chin Chin. Although sometimes, he likes pretending that it’s his real friend in order to fill in that empty, lonely space in his heart. The lycra closed the laptop, putting it aside. “Hey uh… Frank…do you know where salamander man is? Haven’t really seen him at all today..” pink guy in reality didn’t exactly speak English, it was gurgled out gibberish, but everyone could understand him well. Frank paused for a second before nodding. “Yeah man, he should be outside in the back just getting some air I think.” Pink guy gave him a slight glare before he made his way outside to the backyard to search for his friend. Salamander man was sitting on the ground, staring at the sky in admiration. Pink guy got down onto his knees and hands, crawling to him. “Yo, haven’t seen you at all today man, what the fuck you doing out here?” Pink guy asked him. Salamander man turned his eyes onto Pink guy, smiling. He made a long 'nyess’ noise as he looked back up at the sky. “Yoo, I’ve been just chilling. It’s fucking nice out.” Pink guy looked up as well, looking at how beautifully bright and blue the sky appeared. “I guess it is pretty nice out here, it’s better than being around filthy fakeass…” pink guy responded. Salamander man stood back on his feet as he stayed crouched down, rubbing his nipples as usual. “I was thinking, since this whole war shit is going on, do you suppose we should start recruiting soon?” Pink guy sighed, nodding. “We gotta. The omniverse is in big danger. Chin chin’s kinda already after our asses, especially mine.” Salamander man stayed quiet for a bit before speaking up in a quieter tone. He knew they have had to travel several times in order to stay out of Chin chin’s way. “We must be careful. Who knows what the dark lord has up his sleeves. We already gotta deal with fake frank.” Pink guy clenched his fists a little, becoming serious. “I know, i know..that cunt always manages to have it his way somehow.” He mumbled as he stood back on his feet, his eyes still looking upwards. “I wish he saw things the way I saw them. Life is a precious thing. I believe it is something worth protecting..” Salamander man nodded in agreement. “Nyess.. but i think the dark lord is too much of a dumbass to figure out why. He’s too caught up with wanting to be an almighty powerful god.” Salamander man stated as he started to slowly make his way back into the house, “C'mon, let’s not let this shit consume us.” Pink guy was silently still before he deeply sighed, following right behind Salamander man. Safari man was in the dining area, sitting alone as he looked down at the floor, upset. Ever since Frank left, Safari man was much less happy and he liked to distance himself sometimes. Salamander man and Pink guy walked in, eyeing him. “Hey Safari man.. you doing okay man?” Pink guy asked him, both approaching him slowly. Safari man stiffly looked up at his friends. “Ah, hello you two. And…To be honest with you, i have seen better days, my friend.” He spoke softly in Japanese. Salamander man patted his back in a comforting manner. “We’re here for you dude. We’re gonna get through this bullshit together.” Salamander man hoped. Pink guy nodded. “Yeah man, i know we’ll find real frank soon. We’ll be together again..” Pink guy added, offering his friends a smile. However, Frank abruptly barged into the kitchen, making the trio flinch. “Hey! Where the fuck is the safari bitch?!” He shouted, stepping into the dining area. “There you are! Where’s the food i told you to make you dumb cunt?? I’m fucking starving!” Safari man began to feel much smaller, hunching over in fear. “A-ah! Gomen'nasai (I’m sorry)! I got dis-stracted but i will do that right now!” He cried out. Fake Frank had been kind of abusive to the crew, always screaming at them to do shit for him, especially safari man, who was the weakest of the crew. Pink guy stood in front of safari man, protectingly. “Yo, back the hell off! You can do that shit yourself, you lazy asswhipe! We’re not here to be your servants!” Pink guy retorted at Frank. Frank glared at them, throwing his hands into the air. “Fine! I’ll do it since i have to live around you ungrateful fucks! Just remember who pays the bills here!” He turned away, stomping back to the kitchen. Salamander man laughed at Frank’s idiocy. “What a fucking asshole.” Pink guy looked back at Safari man, who was wide eyed with shock. “Hey, don’t let him push you around like that. The real Frank wouldn’t do this shit.” Safari man sighed. “You are right. If the real frank were to ask me to make him something to eat, I’d have more guts to deny him, Ahaha!” He joked. Frank could be an asshole sometimes, but he knew when enough was enough. If Fake Frank didn’t like the meals he was prepared, he would throw the food at their faces while verbally embarrassing them. The true Frank would of just called out that it was shit, and would simply get up and cook it to his liking. “Well, if next time he’s being a dick to any of you, let me know. I ain’t afraid of that fake son of a bitch.” Pink guy said, pointing at Salamander man and Safari man. They nodded, thanking Pink guy for his courage. Pink guy walked out of the dining room area, into the kitchen where Frank was cooking. Pink guy remained silent, just wanting to leave the area, until he felt Frank pull on his pink suit. He tuned around quickly, eyeing him oddly. “What Frank?” He said, annoyed. Frank sneered at him, getting his face closer to him. “I suggest that y'all stop talking shit. Don’t think that I’ll hesitate to fight you, just 'cuz your my friend.” Pink guy pulled away from his grip. Friend. The word echoed in his head. That Frank was no friend to anyone who lived in that apartment. He was a crooked imposter and will always be one. “I know dumbass..” He muttered, leaving the kitchen as fast as possible. Pink guy deeply sighed, heading to the room where frank use to make his videos originally before he was banished into the rice fields. He crawled onto the bed, lying there as he contemplated what he should do. “Hm..I could always just..” he looked over for his laptop, turning it on. “I could always either work on music, or watch some porn.” He said, typing in “milf gets gangbanged by midgets”. He’s into some strange stuff. He scrolled down, not really find anything good. Just some things he’s already seen. Pink guy exited the porn site, clicking onto his musical program instead. “Music it is then.” He hummed, tapping his chin in a ponderous manner. He was still working on Pink season, which would service the return of frank soon hopefully. He wanted to make it as good (or as shitty in some people’s perspective) as possible, not only for himself or for the fans, but for Frank’s wellbeing. He started working away, thinking up beats and lyrics that suited up to his taste. Suddenly, Salamander burst in the room along with Safari man, who’s face was brightened up. “Pink guy! We have great news!” Safari man exclaimed. Pink guy stopped writing down on his notepad, quickly looking up. “What’s up? What happened?” Salamander man rubbed his nipples faster, grinning. “Frank’s playing a recorder from a distance and i can sense it! He’s trying to communicate with me!” Pink guy’s eyes widened, a smile growing on his face. “Are you fucking serious!? That’s amazing!” Pink guy stood up on all fours on his bed. “You two, you guys need to head out to find him. Salamander man frowned. "But, then you’ll be alone..” Pink guy got off the bed, placing his hand on Salamander man’s shoulder. “I’ll be fine. If we all leave, fake frank will become suspicious. Plus, i have to work on the coordinates for Frank. I can later travel realms one at a time to try to find you two, and I could give them to you once I’ve finished so frank can return home! So, how about it?” Salamander man and Safari man looked at each other and then back at Pink guy. “That sounds like a plan. Please take care of yourself. Don’t let Fake Frank get to you too much.” Pink guy smiled, hugging his friends. “I’ll make sure of it. You two stay safe ok? Always be on the look out for Chin chin’s henchmen.. you never know.” Pink guy let go, taking one last look at his friends, waving goodbye to each other. Salamander man and Safari man left to travel to wherever the recorder noises where coming from. Pink guy had to cover for them and lie to Frank if he questioned where the two went. It was going to be a long couple of chromosomes before they got to see each other again. But in the end, Pink guy believed it was all worth it. To have his friends reunited was something he was wishing for badly. To be able to see Frank again. To be at peace in the omniverse once more.

[girltomboy]

I for some reason today have extreeeaaamme neck and back and shoulder pain. Probably from sleeping with the window fully open? Since it's not really as hot anymore these days. Anywayssss YESTERDAY oomf messaged me to go on discord and play with them, so I did and I played for the first time in like 2 weeks. Since my bf doesn't want to play with me anymore :) I appreciated that tho. I hate playing alone, which is why I didn't even play at all in such a long time.

I think my sex drive is a bit different but I can't tell what changed it. Maybe Mars retrograde lol. But really, I used to get a lot more turned on/ more intensely. I'm not complaining, cuz I still DO get turned on, and when I masturbate it takes me a bit longer to finish, but the orgasms are just as good as before. It's just that I used to feel a lot more differently BEFORE the actual masturbation. Nowadays I just feel a hint of horniness and I'm like fineeee. Maybe it's the fact that I haven't been leaving the house at all, I spend my entire days in bed watching TV or sitting on my phone/laptop, not moving, not going outside, etc... Idk if it could be my meds? I don't see why, but it's possible. I'm gonna look on reddit to see if it's common.

[inked-convulsion]

Why my weight gain wasn’t completely my fault

When I gained a massive amount of weight during my last relationship, I pointed the finger at the guy I was together with at the time. Yes, I'm supposed to take responsibility for my own habits that led to my weight gain - but hear me out.

Even till today, I relate a certain 'skinniness' to being attractive. And it's not just being 'skinny', it's being skinny with curves in the right places for myself. Before screaming "non-feminist" at me, that's my personal standard for how my own body should look, and given my current size - especially my figure during that time - I am not happy with my body.

My ex did not like that I may be considered attractive by other people - it would be too much of a distraction for other guys and he couldn't bear that other guys may be interested in me physically, so he made it a point to police my body as much as he could, including doing things like restricting my wardrobe choices (no low-cut tops, no mid-riff baring clothes), and trying to stop any of my efforts to get back in shape.

I was just over 21, living in a place where I could not comfortably do what I want without hearing "feedback" about my activities in the house, sleeping on what was essentially a bedsheet half the size of a small single mattress, had no other social life outside of him and his friends, and surviving on a salary of under MYR3k while covering the living expenses for two - I paid for his phone bills and food (not to mention majority of his "transportation") while he whisked his money away on cigarettes and devices that he did not need the moment he had his hands on money.

And I was never enough.

He never said it explicitly, but I was always to blame for his insecurities - because I come from a better family, because I had a double degree and was earning a stable living because of it, and because I wasn't working hard enough to make him un-see all of that so that he could feel more confident about himself. While I had actual, objective discussions about various topics with my colleagues, I couldn't do any discussion without him talking over me and saying my opinion meant nothing because he had more experience "in the industry" and "met more influential people" than I did. My rants about feminism and depression were all "attention-seeking" activities - women will always have it better because they can use their sexuality to get what they want, and if I wanted equality, I would also be okay with a guy hitting me back if I ever hit him.

While I tried to discuss possible money managing plans with him, he would only tell me he had enough money to tide us over. Call me selfish, but I was - and still am - in my early 20s, I didn't want to spend this period of my youth with only enough money to survive from one day to another while worrying about whether I would have to resort to hoarding crackers from the office for something to eat by the end of the month. I wanted to at least have enough money to be able to enjoy something nice once in a while without feeling so goddamn guilty that I burned through a couple of meals for a cup of bubble tea. I wanted to wear slutty clothes while my age still allowed it and feel attractive to myself before age started to settle in.

I didn't want to be confined to a small room smelling of cat piss and shit the moment I come home from work, sleep in it, then leave for work the next morning. I was paying for petrol and tolls whenever he decided that we should go somewhere for a road trip or day trip, and I was the one driving while he either slept through the journey, or criticized my driving whenever he was awake long enough.

I'm going off topic - why I gained so much weight.

He seldom defended my decision to try to diet - his family members would always make fun of fat or chubby women, but keep telling me that no matter how much I eat of [insert name of food here], I won't gain weight. As the clothes that I felt attractive in slowly became too tight to wear, I wasn't allowed to exercise. The only few times that we did, I either got stood up, or I was left alone to walk around without socks like an idiot while he "rested" at a nearby bus stop.

"You could've fought back and defended yourself."

Yes, I could have. Try on my shoes during that time, though: jealous boyfriend, limited and uncomfortable sleep, overwhelming financial stress, lack of affection and appreciation from him, overwhelming stress to perform to expectations at work (which he very conveniently invalidated because "sitting in front of a laptop all day surfing Facebook isn't real work"), and a serious lack of social life because he didn't like that I talked to basically anyone but him.

My spirit and soul were frazzled beyond belief, and any attempts to discuss my psychology with him would be peppered with stoic criticism and/or invalidation, 'cause he just could not or would not try to see why I needed a social life and a better body and less financial burdens. Even if I did fight fiercely at first, it always became more and more emotionally draining to just try to fight for something that he would always oppose to time and again, citing everything between sky and earth as a valid reason not to go through with my plans/opinions. We would end up fighting, with me crying if I even had the energy left inside to cry. I was constantly thinking about how to kill myself without having him blame me for his future psychological breakdown if I ever kill myself in his house.

So to avoid any more emotional drainage, I just avoided the fighting - I would just let him say what he wanted to say, cuz fighting was futile anyway.

That one time I went to the gym with my colleagues (who are not surprisingly all male), and despite feeling quite good about finally being able to feel sore muscles and sweat buckets, I came home to a sarcastic "so was the 4P fun?" It crushed me, because this - and a lot of other incidents - showed how much he hated me having a life outside of him, and how insecure he was about me even being in the line of sight of another guy. He kept brushing it off as a joke when I told him how hurt it made me, and it was my problem that I took it so seriously and that if I had no feelings or ulterior relationships with those guys, I wouldn't be affected. Needless to say, I didn't go back ever again for the remainder of our time together.

Since the gym was out of the question, I wanted to go running or jogging. He wouldn't let me go without him because it would be dangerous to be alone where the crime rate was fairly high, but he also had a million reasons to not go with me: he didn't sleep well cuz I was taking up most of the bed the previous night, something I said made him lose sleep, his job was so stressful so he wanted that day to sleep in, it was too hot, it was raining, etc. In the end, I just gave up trying to find a suitable day to do it. He only came through a couple of times, but they were either cut very short, or it would end up in disaster. We went out "jogging" around his area one weekend after I insisted during the weekday to do so, but since he was so opposed to the idea, I didn't pack any socks as I wasn't anticipating anything to come through but a day at home. When the weekend came, he insisted that we go jogging because he went running without socks before and he was fine. I ended up walking 50% of that journey alone "because of pain in his joint" under the sweltering afternoon sun, downhill and up again, pass foreign workers who stared and smirked at me uncomfortably. By the time our "workout" was done, my feet were bleeding through my shoes - the rough inside of the shoe has rubbed and broke a huge blister near by big toe, not to mention at the back of my feet. I was then further blamed for my own "patterns" for going ahead with something when I knew this would be the outcome.

In the end, I just stayed at home all day, occasionally using his mother's old weights to no avail. In university, I told myself I would never let myself become 60kg ever again, but at the peak of my weight, I was 80kg. The figure I was so proud to have was nothing but load of fat, and blood circulation in my arms would be uncomfortably cut off even by my looser tops. I couldn't bear looking at myself in the mirror, clothed or unclothed, and it didn't help that his stance on sex was only because of physical need.

All in all, it's my own responsibility to bear that I stayed on with a manipulative control-freak who did not want to see me happy. But all this has given me a fresh appreciation for the things that my current boyfriend does for me, even if it's the things that I don't like, such as telling me that a McFlurry is a bad idea. It's given me a fresh perspective on what love and a healthy relationship actually is - not sticking with anyone through thick and thin even if the circumstances are extremely biased toward the benefit of one and the undernourishment of another, but actually appreciating each other and supporting each other through thick and thin, helping each other to the best of our ability, and even if not improving for oneself, improving ourselves for the sake of the other.