#i think kids call teachers 'mom' because they're still young and don't have much contact with adults that aren't parents/their family
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a thing that irks me about wgxn as lsz's Best Parents Ever and lsz himself calling them his fathers iiiis that aren't... parents and basically ancestors... kinda important in chinese culture? yknow, like *gestures at some of the characters' complicated relationships w/ their parents, their legacy and last wishes*? lsz discovers he's a wen and doesn't immediately go "ah well, doesn't matter, they were Problematic and i feel more like a lan anyway", but rather goes to the nighless city with wn to bury the ashes of their family and build a cenotaph for wq. that means he still wants to honor his ancestry, especially since he's the last surviving member of his clan. would lsz just... conveniently forget about all that -- about his parents, whoever they were, who died in the war -- for lwj? hm
#there was a post or perhaps a thread or maybe even more than one#about how the juniors would SURELY mistakenly refer to their sect leaders as mom/dad and i was like. g#i think kids call teachers 'mom' because they're still young and don't have much contact with adults that aren't parents/their family#members. so when you want to call an adult and your brain malfunctions you either go mom or dad (so: the usual)#but if you're a disciple of a sect you have a Bunch of older people around you each of which has their own name -- sect siblings#teachers etc not to mention other sects' members -- so i feel like it would be much more difficult to make that mistake#especially since i'm not quite sure disciples at that age would see the sect leader a lot unless he's personally teaching them#but ig that doesn't happen very often if he's busy with other things. there are other disciples and elders who can pass their knowledge dow#idk it just seems kinda... western? american? i can't say. to assume an adult who's important has to be a parent/parental figure which is#ALMOST the same as parent really! and can be referred to as 'dad'/'mom'#like. no! not really! a 'teacher' is not just your ms smith who taught you english and always praised your handwriting!#it can very much be the person who pushed you to become the person you are right now because they saw your potential#and without them you wouldn't be where you are. this kinda person you send gifts and cards every year for decades after graduation#because you're this thankful for everything they've done for you.#shrimp thoughts#this is not to say that he doesn't feel grateful for everything lwj's done for him -- he saved his life -- but that still doesn't have to#equate to Being his father. wzl didn't call wrh his father either and look how dedicated he was
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(sorry this got longer than I thought)
You know what fic I'd love to read?
One where Carole dies but doesn't get anything in order before her death (as is many times the case) and Mav is installed as Bradley's temporary guardian after her death but everything goes wrong very fast
Due to Mav's less than heterosexuals tendencies, Bradley ends up in the foster system. One day a social worker with a police officer just shows up and takes him away from school and he doesn't know what's going on. He ends up in his first not so good foster family the same evening. Mav can't even visit as he is deemed a bad influence and has an ongoing investigation if he is 'fit' to be Bradley's guardian.
He doesn't stop asking about Mav for months. Keeps trying to run away to him (he's about 50 miles away because foster homes are sparse so no dice) and finally his foster 'mom' is fed up with the constant asks to at least try and call Mav so she tells him Mav didn't want him and doesn't want Bradley to contact him.
And because Bradley is twelve, he believes it.
(It's not that Mav didn't try. There was a whole appeal process but Mav had a deployment right after and he couldn't explain to the social workers that no, Bradley would stay with someone trusted while he was gone, because that someone was Ice, the source of his suspected homosexual tendencies. They literally told him he's not allowed to contact Bradley and once he came back from deployment, Bradley was already in a different foster home, a few counties over and lost in the system.)
Bradley spends the rest of his childhood in the system. His first family is dubious and the following ones are a mix of constant hope and disappointment. He has at least two different families foster him every year, until he is sixteen and ends up in a group home. There are only two families that he actually comes close to calling family - a young married couple that stops fostering when the wife is diagnosed with chronic autoimmune disorder, and a couple of teachers that have to drop one of the two kids they foster when the financial requirements to foster raise and decide that Bradley is going to be that kid.
No one ever even thinks about adopting him. He's got good grades and stays on top of school, but that's about what is going well in his life. Some families he's with are average - they let him be and maybe don't care as much for anything that involves him as long it doesn't stir trouble at the fostering agency and Bradley is healthy and safe. Some families are worse - sometimes he is one of the five kids and is expected to stay and be a live-in nanny, sometimes they're only doing it for the money and he has barely anything, barely any food, barely any attention, barely any clothes, barely any school supplies, just so he doesn't cost too much. Sometimes, things get physical - it happens less, the taller he gets and by the time he starts fighting back, he has enough reputation that no one believes it and no one wants to foster him anymore. And group home it is.
By the time he's seventeen, he's enlisted. Just so he leaves the system as fast as he can. It all works out because the Navy fits the bill for his university and NROTC when the time comes - even if he's told he's not a good candidate for the USNA, even if he was told his grades and his achievements should be more than enough, even if despite the circumstances, he managed to meet the same requirements.
Finding out that it was Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell who protested his application and pulled the plug on it is Bradley's second heartbreak.
Bradley bites down any complaints he has about life and enters UVA at 21, with a military scholarship and NROTC bursary. At that point, he doesn't even know if he still wants to go into aviation, it brings so much bitterness in him. But then his grades and his overall achievement are so good, everyone says it'd be a waste if he didn't go to one of the most competitive pipelines. The Navy pays for his private pilot licence when he hesitates, and sure enough, it does feel good.
The pipeline is where he meets Jake Seresin. Jake Seresin, who has two brothers and two sisters and who has jars of homemade jam and chocolate-covered plums sent in a little package from his mom at least once a month. Jake Seresin, who uses all his leave to attend weddings, holiday parties, birthday parties, even a dog's funeral. Jake Seresin, who comes from every Thanksgiving with spare pumpkin pie, who has a new handmade Christmas sweater every year.
Jake Seresin, who, for some reason not known to Bradley, is impressed with how effortless learning to fly is for Bradley, with how much Bradley knows, with how much he leads in the lectures and the flight lessons - most guys find Bradley annoying and cold and Bradley would've agreed with them if any said it to his face. The Navy is the only good thing Bradley's had since his mom died, he has much more time to focus on being good at whatever Navy throws at him and maybe that makes him strange and aloof. But not Jake.
Jake Seresin, who is a competitive asshole that can't shut his mouth for his own good. Who has no idea of personal space, who fills the silence better than a jukebox, who will drill and drill the topic until he gets an answer he can comprehend, who doesn't care what people think of him as long as he knows his worth.
Bradley might have a bit of a crush on him, but it's an annoying crush kind of crush - one he doesn't really want to have, one he doesn't really know what to do with. Jake Seresin, who probably would never look at Bradley twice, especially in that way.
They get separate F-18 training bases and Bradley forgets for a moment Jake Seresin ever existed.
Then, summer of 2011, Jake Seresin gets restationed, right into Bradley's squadron. And he's still his annoying self, inserting himself into Bradley's private space, private time, and doesn't let Bradley have a say in it, at all.
Maybe Bradley doesn't want to have any say in it, deep down.
A few months later, DADT gets repealed. It doesn't change much for Bradley, he's not going to talk to anyone about his personal life. But it seems it changes something for Jake.
Because he asks Bradley out on a date.
Bradley's never really dated. Didn't really have the time to when he was a teenager, moved so many times, and then he enlisted, and then he was in college and NROTC. He slept with people, but he's never dated anyone.
So he gets to know Jake Seresin. Jake Seresin, who despite bringing all that food back with him any time he visits his parents, can't cook at all and who would hang onto Bradley's arm or shoulders whenever Bradley cooked. Who can sew so well that he saves all of Bradley's old shirts. Who can't keep his mouth shut, no matter the circumstances - not in the theatre, not when they eat, not when they just watch a movie at home, not even in bed. Who seems to know every single tune under the sun but can't play a single instrument. Who has elaborate, detailed plans for his life - an admiral by forty, two kids by thirty-five, a nice little house in driving distance to some body of water, a German shepherd or a border collie for a family dog once the house is there, a personal two or maybe four-person plane by the time he's forty-five, maybe co-owning aeroclub by fifty.
Bradley's never before thought about the future.
He never tells Jake even half of the things he's seen and lived through when he was in foster care, never tells him about his pulled application from USNA, never tells him about Mav. He doesn't think Jake would be able to understand, the way his family seems perfect and loving and caring. He doesn't want him to know how many things is wrong with him.
But Jake knows he's got no family, that his dad died in the Navy, his mom when he started middle school, that he's been in foster care for all his teenage years. Knows that Bradley has no one to come back home.
"Don't be a fool, sweetheart," is what Jake tells him. "You've got me."
For the first time in his life at the age of 29, Bradley requests Christmas leave.
Bradley's never had a big family, but there was a time he once had a family - or so he thought, when he was twelve and the illusion shattered - so he thought he'd be okay.
And at first, he is fine. Jake rotates him around like a prize piece, introducing him to his siblings, parents, aunts, uncles, nephews, cousins, grandparents, but it's just two or three people at once. Whenever it seems like too much, Bradley drifts away to the kitchen where he can just stay silent and listen to Jake's mom talk to the various people that come by while he slices homemade ham or he steps out onto the backyard and talks to the kids of all the ages gathered around the makeshift playground.
But then they're right before dinner starts - there are over thirty people in the open space of the house, now that everyone arrived, and Bradley feels hot, suffocating in the crowded space, in the clutter of gifts and food and colorful Christmas sweaters.
And then, before he can take any of it in, he hears Jake, saying in his typical loud and teasing tone, that Bradley can play the piano, and look at that, he could play something Christmas-y before the turkey is done, and next thing he knows, there's over thirty pairs of eyes on him and plenty of people asking questions and making teasing remarks and it all seems so tricky--
He can't imagine himself, in that room, with all those people, feeling comfortable. So he walks out.
Bradley doesn't know how to be a part of a family. There's no reason to try and lie to himself and everyone else.
They don't see each other for years after. The next time they do, it's only the eight weeks at Top Gun. The Jake that Bradley knew isn't there - this Jake is bitter and sarcastic and sharp with his tongue. This Jake wins Top Gun and never looks back at Bradley when he returns to his station base.
The next time they see each other is at the Top Gun recall when Bradley is going through a life roller coaster.
Not only is Jake being the biggest ass not just to him but to everyone, for the first time in twenty years, Bradley sees Mav. Sure, maybe he's not moved on from Jake - he still remains the only person Bradley ever dated - but he's managed to dodge Maverick, and Iceman by association, in all those years he's been in the Navy and now he's forced to pretend all is fine.
And Maverick doesn't make it easier.
He tries to approach Bradley like they're long-lost friends, saying all those things about how he missed him and how Bradley looks so much like his dad. Like he didn't leave him in the foster system when he was a kid and didn't fuck up his application for USNA.
So he pretends he doesn't remember Maverick because that's the easiest given that Maverick is supposed to train him.
On top of that, Jake mixes himself up into Bradley's shit life situation when he overhears Mav trying to get Bradley to 'remember' and 'renew their relationship' and keeps pestering Bradley. Maybe he can tell you more about your childhood, why the hell are you so rude to him, he wouldn't make up knowing you, you know, maybe he's got some of your parents' stuff and can share---
And hearing the love of his life that he let get away because Bradley didn't know how to be part of his family side with the first person that told Bradley he's not enough to be someone's family - well, it's not exactly helping the state of Bradley'e mental being.
So maybe he explodes at Jake, a little bit, in the end. You want to talk to the man who left me behind when I was twelve and the only time he looked back was to tell me he didn't think I was good enough? Then so be fucking it.
Instead of butting into Bradley's life, Jake shuts up and starts avoiding him. Bradley supposes he has what he wanted.
Bradley doesn't care what Maverick thinks or if he changed or if he wants something from Bradley.
He still turns around when he's shot down. It's not like he's got someone to come back to anyway. Not because he cares about Maverick.
"I'm not you," Bradley tells Mav. "I don't leave people behind."
The admittance - that he knows and remembers Mav and wants nothing to do with him, wants to be nothing like him - works. They survive and Bradley doesn't see Maverick again, not when they're in the med bay, not when they're in the hospital in San Diego, not when he gets discharged.
He sees Jake instead, waiting on him at the reception of the unit he had been on, patiently waiting for Bradley to sign his discharge papers without using his broken wrist.
"What, do you have someone else to take your broken ass home?"
In truth, Bradley was just going to take a taxi. Instead, Jake takes the plastic bag with Bradley's clothes and silently leads them to his truck before he asks for Bradley's address.
And in all this mess, the first thing Jake asks him is, "Are you going to stay in San Diego?" because they have the offer to stay there and make their place in Top Gun-adjacent brand new squadron.
"No, I'm going to go back to my base," Bradley tells him. There's nothing for him San Diego, but there's plenty for Jake and he doesn't want to be a barrier.
"I think you should stay in San Diego. With me."
He wishes it was that simple but the truth is, Bradley is still the same.
"I can't be the person you want to have in your life."
"But you already are the person I want in my life."
"I think this is going to end up badly."
"Only if you let it."
Bradley's never really could say no to Jake.
It all seems so easy, when he falls asleep on Jake's shoulder watching Top Gear, but at some point, Bradley knows, they will get to the point when it'll all crush again.
There is also the whole thing with Maverick, their now CO, who appears to be some kind of ashamed now that he finally knows that Bradley remembers what he did - or rather what he didn't do. He avoids Bradley like the plague and it seems to be affecting the squad - because they all love Maverick and Bradley is the weirdo who can't have fun or be friendly. He's just waiting on someone to call him out as the party pooper contrasting to their fun CO and deem the problem, as always, just because he can't pretend to be happy to be around him.
Jake hasn't said anything about the Maverick thing explicitly but he gives Bradley those looks whenever Maverick is nearby and sometimes he makes those quips
#dunno how that would resolve#probably ice would intervene at some point#just to clarify mav is feeling extremely guilty#hangster#bradley rooster bradshaw#tgm#i wish my mind could just transfer this idea into like a movie montage#but instead id have to spend hours of writing to bring it to life 馃槶
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Change - Ch. 1 | S E V E N
Pairing - Bill Denbrough x reader
Word Count - 4,475
A/N - it鈥檚 been a bit hasn鈥檛 it? I鈥檓 so sorry for the semi-long wait! it鈥檚 getting near the end of my basketball season so I鈥檝e been busy with senior night (which went great but was very emotional) and trying to wrap the season up while also juggling the mounds of homework my teachers have thrown at me. anyways, here鈥檚 an update for you all! I really hope you like it! and for those reading Wonderwall (my Steve Harrington rewrite) I鈥檓 currently working on an update for that as well!
if you all would like to be added to the tag list, let me know!
C H A N G E
Change Series Masterlist
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S E V E N -聽 Pictures
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Y/N was silent as she held onto her cousin's arm, standing close to him due to the bit of fear coursing through her body. Her eyes flickered over the missing poster in front of her, the name Edward Corcoran and the words 13 years old standing out almost as much as the thick bold letters spelling out missing.
Edward had been her age, a kid just like her and all of the other members of the Losers' Club. What had happened to him was still unknown, but Y/N couldn't stop thinking about that clown that not only her, but Bill, Beverly, Stan, and Eddie had seen as well.
"They say they found part of his hand all chewed up near the standpipe," Stan muttered as he shuffled awkwardly where he stood. His words made Y/N gulp and she gave him a questioning look as to why he would say something like that as she let go of his arm. Stan only gave her a look in response, confused by what she was doing.
"He asked to borrow a pencil once," Ben commented, and Y/N felt like she might be sick. Something about knowing that they had known Edward made the situation that much more real. After all he was a boy that had used to walk the same hallways as her cousin. He wasn't the first one to disappear like this and it didn't seem like he was going to be the last.
A commotion coming from the steeet caught Y/N's attention and she turned her head to lock eyes on Richie who was currently playing one of the band kid's instruments while the kid desperately tried to wrestle it out of his hands. The corners of her lips tugged up ever so slightly as she watched Richie, her eyes then flickering over the parade going by before a movement out of the corner of her eye had her turning back to the others.
Bill was walking towards the flyer and he hesitated before gently lifting the paper up to reveal another missing flyer for a girl named Betty Ripsom. Bill sighed before letting his eyes flicker over to his friends, his gaze instantly locking with Y/N's.
"It's like she's been f-f-forgotten because Corcoran's missing," Bill said, his words making Y/N frown slightly and look to her feet while Bill hung his head and put Edward's flyer back down.
"Is it ever gonna end?" Stan questioned.
"What the fuck, dude?" Richie's voice could be heard yelling out in frustration as the band kid tore his instrument away from the boy before running away.
"What are you guys talking about?" Eddie asked as he came up behind Y/N. The girl jumped in surprise and Eddie flashed her an apologetic look as he licked one of the ice cream cones in his hands.
"What they always talk about," Richie replied in annoyance as Eddie handed the boy the other ice cream cone.
"I actually think it will end, for a little while, at least," Ben told them.
"What do you mean?" Beverly asked, everyone's eyes now on the young boy.
"So I was going over all of my Derry research and I charted out all of the big events. The Ironworks explosion in 1908. The Bradley Gang in '35 and The Black Spot in '62. And now kids being. . ." Ben trailed off as his gaze fell on Bill. He quickly looked away and sighed as he said, "I realized this stuff seems to happen-"
"Every 27 years," Ben, Y/N, and Bill all uttered in unison, Y/N and Bill both making eye contact as those words left their mouths.
It was silent as the group stood there before Y/N shook her head and whispered out, "Shit." All eyes turned to the girl who put a hand to her head almost in pain before she turned and began to walk away, the action causing them all to look at her confused.
"Y/N?" Bill called out, his voice soft and filled with concern.
"I. . .I just need to sit down," Y/N replied with a wave of her hand as she walked down the street. The others all shared a look before quickly following after her, not wanting her to be alone.
Before long, the group had ended up sitting down at a park bench set up in the middle of town. Beverly, Stan, Mike, and Ben all sat on the green bench while Richie, Eddie, and Bill were seated on their bikes. As for Y/N, she was sitting on the ground by Bill's side.
She was resting her head against Bill's leg, something that hadn't gone unnoticed by Bill or Stan, and was pinching the bridge of her nose as she tried to wrap her head around everything that she had been told over the past couple of days and everything that she had witnessed since she got here.
Derry was definitely a little stranger than the last time she had been there that was for sure.
"Ok, so let me get this straight. It comes out from wherever to eat kids for like a year and then what? It just goes into hibernation?" Eddie finally asked
"Maybe it's like. . .what do you call it? Cicadas. You know, the bugs that come out once every 17 years," Stan suggested while Y/N removed her hand to scrunch up her nose and look to her cousin.
"I don't think it's that," Y/N muttered with a shake of her head. Cicadas and kids going missing were not the same thing at all.
"My grandfather thinks this town is cursed. He says that all the bad things that happened in this town are because of one thing. An evil thing that feeds off the people of Derry," Mike explained.
Y/N's stomach grew queasy again and she let out a soft groan as she laid back against Bill's leg, the boy reaching down to brush some of the hair out of her face almost automatically before the two shared a small smile.
"But it can't be one thing. We all saw something different," Stan pointed out.
"Maybe. Or maybe It knows what scares us most and that's what we see," Mike suggested.
"But I don't. . .I don't fear my father," Y/N argued.
"Did he do or say something that scares you?" Mike asked, wondering if it wasn't Y/N's father that scared her but something else that he might've done or said.
Y/N's face fell at that and a flash of pain flickering across her face before she looked down, the sudden realization of what fear her father was supposed to represent hitting her harder than she had expected. For one of the things she feared most in the world was being the reason her parents split up and for being the reason her family wasn't a family anymore.
It didn't take much for the others to know that she had realized what her fear was, but Eddie knew she wouldn't want to talk about it and was quick to speak up, "I-I saw a leper. He was like a walking infection." Everyone's gaze turned to him and Y/N gave him a thankful smile which he returned.
"But you didn't. Because It isn't real. None of this is. Not Eddie's leper or Bill seeing Georgie or Y/N seeing her father or the woman I keep seeing," Stan insisted, the others all looking down as they tried to believe Stan's words. For it was better to think that they were all hallucinating than to know that something out there was changing into their worst fears.
"Is she hot?" Richie suddenly asked in pure curiosity that made Stan scrunch his nose up in disgust and glare at his friend.
"No, Richie. She's not hot. Her face is all messed up," Stan explained with a tad bit of aggression while Richie frowned. "None of this makes any sense. They're all like bad dreams."
"Nightmares," Y/N whispered, her face pale as she ran a hand through her hair. By now she was thinking of all of her fears and what It could do to her that she was more frightened now than she had been five minutes ago.
"I don't think so, I know the difference between a bad dream and real life, okay?" Mike told them, the seriousness in his voice making them fall quiet.
"What did you see? You saw something too?" Eddie asked.
"Yes," Mike muttered, his head falling as his eyes glazed over as if he were seeing the memory before his very eyes. "You guys know that burnt down house on Harris Avenue? I was inside when it burned down. Before I was rescued my mom and dad were trapped in the next room over from me. They were pushing and pounding on the door trying to get to me. But it was too hot. When the firefighters finally found them. . .the skin on their hands melted down to the bone."
A heavy silence fell among the group and Mike let his eyes flicker over each of them before firmly saying, "We're all afraid of something."
"Got that right," Richie said causing Y/N to look to him.
"What about you, Tozier? What are you afraid of?" Y/N asked, her voice soft as she looked to the boy. He glanced down at her for a second before sighing and looking back at the stage behind them which had a clown on stage.
"Clowns."
- - -
Bill let out a small sigh of frustration as he struggled to keep the blueprints on the wall from moving as he pinned them up. Before he could yell at one of his friends to help him, a small and gentle voice said, "Here, I'll help."
Bill didn't even have time to blink before Y/N was sliding up beside him to hold the paper up while he was able to pin the blueprint to the wall. Once it was secure, the two brought their arms down and looked to each other. "Thanks," Bill whispered before the two smiled softly at each other.
"Okay, lovebirds! If you aren't going to fucking kiss then sit down!" Richie exclaimed in slight amusement and annoyance, a few chuckles escaping his lips at the sight of Bill and Y/N blushing a deep red before they walked away from the blueprint.
Mike pulled the door to Bill's garage down while Eddie flipped on the projector that Bill had him set up. The Losers then all crowded around the projector while Bill put a slide in. Y/N and Bill locked eyes for a split second before Y/N quickly turned away and sat down beside Eddie on the floor, the boy sending a small smile in her direction which she quickly returned before they looked to the blueprints which had a projection of an old Derry map on top of it.
"Okay. Look. That's where G-G-Georgie disappeared. There's the Ironworks and the Black Spot. Everywhere It happens it's-it's all connected by the sewers and they all meet up at the-" Bill began as he pointed towards the spots marked on the map.
"The Well House," Ben said in surprise.
"Well House?" Y/N questioned, not knowing what they were talking about.
"That's the house on Neibolt Street," Stan explained, his voice shaking slightly as he spoke.
"You mean that creepy-ass house where all the junkies and hobos like to sleep?" Richie questioned while Eddie began to panic. The boy quickly pulled his inhaler out and took a hit before breathing heavily beside Y/N. The girl frowned and was quick to put a hand on Eddie's back, gently rubbing up and down his back in a comforting manner and helping the boy to calm down.
"I hate that place," Beverly admitted. "Always feels like it's watching me."
Eddie was finally able to calm down enough to sit back up straight and he leaned into Y/N's touch slightly, seeking the sisterly comfort she seemed to be giving him and that he used to receive from her when they were younger.
"That's where I saw It," Eddie told them. "That's where I saw the clown."
"Tha-tha-tha-that's where It lives," Bill concluded, the statement being enough to make Eddie use his inhaler once again.
"I can't imagine anything ever wanting to live there," Stan muttered.
"Guys," Y/N said in warning as she noticed Eddie's panicking state, but the boy was already jumping to his feet and turning to look at his friends.
"Can we stop talking about this?" Eddie asked. "I-I-I can barely breathe and-and-and Y/N's not even able to calm me down like she always does. It's summer. We're kids, I can barely breathe. I'm having a fucking asthma attack and fuck doing this!"
Eddie turned around and quickly grabbed ahold of the blueprint map that Bill and Y/N had just put up and ripped it off the wall. "What the hell! Put the map back!" Bill yelled while Eddie shook his head.
Y/N sighed and quickly got up from her spot before walking over to the boy. "Eds, it's okay," Y/N assured him while the boy watched her wearily.
"Woah! Woah! Woah! How come she gets to call you Eds without you biting her head off?" Richie complained.
"Because she's not an asshole like you!" Eddie exclaimed while Richie frowned and muttered something under his breath.
It was at that moment that the projector flickered on and off, the slide changing to a blank one and causing the group to look to Bill who was staring at the projector confused. The projector did the motion again and a picture of Georgie and Mr. Denbrough appeared in the place of the map. Although this time everyone had noticed that Bill hadn't been the one to change the slides.
"What happened?" Bill asked confused as the slides moved again, family pictures of the four Denbroughs appearing before them. "What's going on?"
Eddie slowly began to back away while Y/N merely looked at the pictures in confusion before looking back at Bill. "Bill, what's happening?" Y/N questioned.
"I don't know," Bill shook his head as Mike came over and tried to stop the projector only to find that he couldn't. His eyes then flickered up to the screen and he muttered, "Guys. . ."
Y/N turned back around and watched as pictures of Bill and Georgie appeared on the screen before there was another family picture of the Denbroughs. Although this time it began to zoom in on Georgie in the picture with each click of the projector.
"Georgie," Bill muttered before the projector began to move faster.
"Uh. . .Y/N," Stan said in a panicked voice as he noticed that his cousin was still so far away from him.
However, everyone fell silent and seemed to become mesmerized as they watched the picture suddenly shift view over to Mrs. Denbrough. For a moment it seemed as if her hair was moving with each click of the projector and it didn't take Y/N or the others long to realize that it was moving with each click.
The hair quickly covered his mother's face before slowly starting to move away. With each click, the new face began to be revealed and Y/N felt her breath hitch in her throat once she realized the clown was suddenly coming into view.
It was like she was frozen in terror, the only thing registering in her head was her friends yelling out as they desperately tried to stop the projector.
"What the fuck?"
"It's It!"
"What the fuck is that?"
"I don't fucking know!"
"Turn it off!"
"Yes, turn it off!"
Mike was the one to react and he quickly kicked the stand the projector was on, sending the projector tumbling to the ground. The picture appeared again only the clown was now gone and all that was left was the empty background of the picture.
Y/N was breathing heavily as she finally blinked out of whatever trance she had been in. Her body was shaking as she looked back at the others with wide eyes only to find them all looking behind her with wide eyes before Bill looked to Y/N in fright and yelled out, "Y/N, get away!"
Y/N felt her whole body tense at that and for some stupid and unknown reason she decided to turn around only to find that there was nothing there. Her shoulders relaxed slightly and she went to turn back at her friends only for the clown suddenly to appear out of no where, it's body now ten times bigger and crawling out of the projected image.
A scream fell from Y/N's lips as the clown turned to look at her and she heard Stan cry out her name among the scream of the others. That was enough to have her moving and Y/N tried to scramble away only for something to grab onto her leg.
Y/N quickly slammed into the ground and turned only to find that It had ahold of her leg. Another scream left her lips and tears were filling her eyes by now as she felt an immense pain in her leg.
It let go of her for a split second and Y/N tried to crawl away as best as she could while It just watched her in amusement. She didn't know what her cousin or her friends were doing at that moment, but for a split second she thought that they had left her and that she was going to die.
Y/N was crying as she crawled across the floor only to get trapped in the corner of the garage while It stared directly at her, his hand outstretched in her direction as he went to grab for her.
"Y/N!" Bill's voice yelled out before he was suddenly grabbing onto the garage door and flinging it up, allowing the light to pour into the garage. The clown disappeared almost immediately and the last thing to be heard was an ear piercing scream from Y/N as she huddled more into herself in the corner of Bill's garage.
Once nothing came for her, Y/N allowed her eyes to flicker open only to find the garage was now empty. This alone was enough to make her break down and Y/N began to sob as she hugged her knees close to her body, the others all standing there breathing heavily as they tried to process what had just happened.
Bill was the only one unfazed and shoved past Stan who was staring at his cousin with wide eyes, a look of pure horror on his face as he had almost seen his best friend die before his very eyes and hadn't been able to do anything about it.
Bill was in front of Y/N in seconds and the girl didn't even hesitate before lunging forward and into Bill's arms, the boy holding her tight while she cried into his shirt. He tucked her head under his chin and cradled the back of her head against his chest as he gently rocked her back and forth, whispering softly to her that she was okay while she cried in his arms.
"It saw us," Eddie whispered once Y/N's cries has quieted. She was still holding onto Bill tightly, the boy having not loosened his grip at all either, but the two turned their gazes to Eddie who was gripping onto his inhaler. "It saw us and It knows where we are."
"It always knew," Bill muttered, those words making Y/N quiet once again. Bill looked down at the girl and his mind was instantly made up on what had to happen next. He gave the girl one last squeeze and even kissed the top of her head before reluctantly pulling away from her, ignoring the heartbroken look in her eyes as she desperately tried to keep hold of him.
Bill stood up and glanced at Stan who took the hint and rushed over to his cousin before helping her up onto her feet. Bill was just about to walk out when he heard a hiss from behind him that had the boy turning around to see Y/N turn her leg for them all to see. He, along with all the others, paled at the sight of two long scratches down the back of her leg, blood rolling down her leg and making Eddie stumble back slightly from the sight.
"Shit," Richie muttered, his eyes filling with concern as he looked at Y/N and gulped.
Y/N's injury only seemed to fuel Bill's rage and he shook his head before storming out of the garage with a new purpose. "Let's go," Bill demanded.
"Go? Go where?" Beverly asked.
"Neibolt," Bill explained and, not wanting to admit his feelings for Y/N and how desperately he wanted to kill that clown for harming her or his brother, added, "That's where G-G-Georgie is."
"After that?" Stan asked appalled as he held his cousin up steady beside him. "After Y/N just got hurt?"
"Yeah, Y/N's hurt and we should help her. Besides it's summer, we should be outside. . ." Richie said.
"If you say it's summer one more f-f-f-fucking time," Bill muttered before letting his eyes flicker over his friends. Each one of them obviously wanted to stay right where they were and it made Bill even angrier than he already was. But then his eyes had landed on Y/N and his face softened ever so slightly as he noticed the utter pain in her eyes as she tried to limp forward and to him.
Shaking his head and knowing that not only would his friends not come, but that he couldn't allow Y/N to face that clown again, Bill turned around and grabbed his bike before beginning to bike away.
"Bill?" Y/N called after the boy, shoving Stan's grip away from her as she desperately tried to limp forward as fast as she could just to stop the boy from leaving by himself. "Wait!"
But Bill was already gone.
- - -
It took a minute for Y/N to convince Stan to let her on to his bike and another few minutes of convincing Eddie to allow her to leave with only a bandage lazily thrown over her wound, but the group was eventually biking after Bill side by side until they reached the Well House. Y/N could see Bill walking up the old stairs and her eyes widened before she yelled out, "Bill!"
Bill turned around in surprise, his eyes locking on Y/N who struggled to get off Stan's bike before she limped over to the stairs as fast as she could, wincing as she did. "Bill, you can't go in there," Y/N pleaded as she reached the stairs. "At least not alone."
Bill looked to the girl with surprise still evident on his face but it quickly washed away once he heard Beverly cry out, "This is crazy." Beverly and the others were behind Y/N in seconds and Bill frowned as he looked at the group.
"Look, you don't have to come in with me, but what happens when another Georgie goes missing, or another Betty or another Ed Corcoran or one of us? Are you just going to pretend it didn't happen like everyone else in this town? Because I can't. I go home and all I see is that Georgie isn't there, his clothes, his toys, his stupid stuffed animal but he isn't. So walking into this house for me. . .it's easier that walking into my own," Bill told them, his voice steady although he had tears in his eyes.
Bill then turned and finished walking up the stairs while Y/N watched him go with a sad look on her face. Her leg was on fire, but she didn't care at the moment because all that mattered was Bill.
"Wow," Richie muttered.
"What?" Ben asked.
"He didn't stutter once," Richie pointed out.
No one made a move to go after the boy and Y/N glanced at her friends before shaking her head and limping over to the stairs. It was a struggle to get up the stairs, but now that the adrenaline was coursing through her body and the initial pain of the injury was gone, it was bearable enough for her to be able to get through the pain for this.
Bill heard the footsteps before he could get to the door and he turned, his face softening at the sight of Y/N limping up the stairs. He didn't even hesitate before going over and holding a hand out for her. She took it and he helped her up the rest of the stairs before she stumbled slightly into him. Bill was quick to steady her and the two stared at each other in silence before Y/N gave him a small nod and whispered, "I'm with you."
Her words were enough to make Bill smile and his heart couldn't help but skip a beat as his feelings for the girl grew even more. He couldn't even find it in himself to tell the girl she couldn't come, for the way she looked at him dead in the eye and the seriousness of her voice was enough to tell him that she really would be by his side through this all, that she wouldn't let him do this alone even if she was hurt.
Y/N eventually tore her eyes away from Bill and looked to the others almost pleadingly and it didn't take much more than Bill's words and Y/N's pleading stare to have them start moving toward the stairs.
"Wait!" Stan cried out, instantly stopping everyone in their tracks. "Uhhh, shouldn't we have some people keep watch. You know, just in case something bad happens?"
Y/N didn't blame her cousin for not wanting to go into that house. After all, a small part of herself was telling her to grab her cousin and get on his bike before pedaling far away. But something was stopping her from doing so and she actually found herself wanting to go in there and kill that clown herself.
"Wh-Wh-Wh-Who wants to stay out here?" Bill asked and everyone in the group except for Bill, Beverly, and Y/N raised their hands. Richie was the first one to notice this and sighed as he lowered his hand.
"Fuck."
* * *
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What I'm about to tell you is a true story. Please read until the end and share it to others to raise awareness.
鈿狅笍 TW: R*PE, SU*C*DE 鈿狅笍
鈿狅笍 18+ 鈿狅笍
I was 5...
You're one of the people from church. You're a funny guy, I always enjoy your jokes and stories. One day you said you want to show me something good and I should follow you. I wish I haven't...
"Suck it, it's just a big lollipop."
"Yummy milk will come out, I promise."
"You wanna put it in here?... I'm afraid it won't fit."
"This is a secret for the both of us only, okay?"
The "milk" wasn't yummy at all and I've always wondered what would've happen to my fragile body if he really put it in. Now, it scares me...
You were never contented, you invited your friends one by one. They all did the same thing.
I regretted and wished I at least told my parents, but I didn't. I was a kid and I didn't know what's happening. He said it's just a game and it's normal. "It was done by many." And so I thought.
It goes on until...
I was 7...
You had the audacity to start your own family and moved to another town.
Even so, your friends remained. It got to the point where I became famous to the boys in our neighborhood without me knowing why. Sometimes, they call me "slut." And here I am with no idea what that means and why they call me that. It goes on until I was a teenager.
Every summer break, an uncle visits my grandma and stays for a week or until classes resume (he was a college student then). I play with him during summer break. It was fine until he found me asleep in my grandma's bed. My grandma was out to buy groceries and we are the only people in the house. All I remember is that I woke up with me lying on his stomach whil he's masturbating. I pretended to be asleep until he finished. At this point I don't know what to feel anymore. I felt empty...
Again, I never told my parents becuse I am a shy kid and I don't talk much about how I feel with anyone, even with my parents. The harrassment stopped when we moved to another town when I was 9.
I'm doing fine, I'm living how a child should be. Enjoying my time playing and studying. I was an honor student. Until I accidentally saw my uncle's lewd magazines when I was 11. I suddenly remembered everything done to me when I was younger. I got confused. I don't know what to feel. All I know is that is how I started learning to masturbate at such a young age. I remembered that I don't like doing it but I can't seem to stop. Sometimes I cry while doing it and I don't even know what to do with it. I'm not even feeling pleasure to it.
I live on with that ever confusing state with a young mind.
I was 12...
We now live with our grandma, back to the town we lived when I was young, because both my parents now work overseas. I don't know what happened to the boys who harrassed me when I was young and I don't care as long as they don't bother me anymore. Or so I thought...
My grandma has a brother and he's older than her. He even uses a cane to help him walk. One time he carassed my thigh while we were sitting. I was so shocked I don't know what to say or do. I've been taught that elderlies must be respected and obeyed or I'll get spanked. When he finally stopped, I immediately ran to the bathroom and cried...
I was 13...
This was the most haunting moment I've experienced. It still haunts my mind every now and then.
My grandma hired a maid. Our maid is young, she was only 17. We got close to each other and I treated her like my big sister. Like how sisters are, we both share our lovelife stories. It was fun, it's a typical teenage life, I even had my puppy love for the first time. He treats me well and he's a gentleman. Unfortunately, we broke up because his mom doesn't like me. Up to this day, I still don't know why she hated me.
Moving on... I liked our maid very much that I go with her even when she goes out during her day offs. One time on her day off, she went home because it's her sister's birthday. I was allowed to go with her and have a sleepover. I was happy. But today, I always wish I haven't gone there...
When we got to their house, they ordered alcohol. I'm not gonna lie, I drank too. It was my first time. In this drinking session, I met her family. That's when I met her brother, he's 24 and works as a driver. Their house is small, shabby and only made of woods and palm leaves. So when it's time to sleep, we all shared one room. They also don't have a bed so we just slept on the floor. I was so wasted that night. It was my first time drinking and I am in no good condition. As everyone was peacefully sleeping, her brother crept beside me and slowly pulled me to the corner. I don't feel good and was half-asleep but I saw him already half naked on top of me. I was about to talk but he covered my mouth with something. I don't know what he did to me but I felt really dizzy. I thought I might fall asleep of the dizziness so I banged my head. It was painful but I managed to slightly open my eyes. I'm still dizzy but I see him sucking my chest. I thought I'm making a lot of noise but nobody is waking up, neither can I talk. I am so confused at that moment. Why is nobody waking up? I was weak but I keep on struggling. But as I was struggling, he caught my hands and tied it behind me. He pulled my hair, shut my mouth with a cloth and banged my head on the pillow. From then on, all I felt was pain. He pulled down his pants and my pants, and he aggressively pushed his way in. It was horrible and painful...
I couldn't do anything. All I know is that I'm in pain and I want it to end. But when he finished, he showed me a cloth and said "Wow, look at all this blood."
I cried.
The morning after, I was silent. I feel so empty, my eyes is empty. I can still feel the pain. Our maid told me to pack up 'cause we're going home. As I was packing up, I heard voices from the window. I saw our maid's brother (the one who r*ped me) and the younger one. The younger one is pointing at his older brother saying "Wtf, she was just a child! That was too much, I can' t do this anymore. I'm so done with you!" As I heard that, I quickly returned to packing my bag. I thought to myself "I am so done with this family, I wanna go home." How could they? So someone was awake while I was suffering and he didn't even dare to stop his brother? DID HE JUST WATCH HIS BROTHER R*PE ME???
When we are about to leave, our maid's brother whispered to me, "Don't ever tell anyone about what happened last night or I'll kill your family."
We're finally back home and I don't know what to do. I was so afraid. I was young and gullible. I couldn't say anything to my parents or grandma 'cause I'm scared. But that night, I couldn't fall asleep. I decided to talk to our maid, that' s how much I trust her. But in the end, she scared me 'cause she boldly asked "Was it good? Did you enjoy it?"
I was speechless. They're all f*cking animals.
It weighed on me like a big boulder on both my shoulders. I kept saying it was just a horrible nightmare but the pain still lingers. Sometimes I slice my wrists or take unprescribed pills to end my suffering. But it just added to my pain.
On one of my worst nights, I contacted my puppy love and told him what has been happening. I know we broke up but we still managed to have secret connections that time because we still like each other. But guess what? He was disgusted by me and he never talked to me ever again since that night.
I lost all my confidante.
A few months later, my mom finally went home for a vacation leave. I cried to her. I just pretended I missed her so much that's why I'm so emotional but her maternal instict got to her. She asked me what really is wrong and that's when I broke down and told her everything. I even told her to keep it a secret 'cause I'm afraid they will really be killed by him.
Of course, she refused.
She contacted my father about it. My father was devastated. She then went to our maid and talked to her, I don't know what about or the details, but she was fired.
After they talked, they went to our maid's house. I don't know the details, all I know is that my mom is so angry and she is taking it to legal matters. She will file a case for what he did.
Sadly and regrettably, it didn't happen. The *ssh*le fled somewhere before he was taken by the authorities. Prior to my r*pe case, we didn't know that he was already wanted because of a m*rder case in another town. Up to this day, he is still missing and wanted.
I was 14...
Hisghschool.
When my puppy love never talked to me again, I lost all my confidence and self-love. I don't know how to respect my self anymore. I feel so dirty. I am a dirtbag, that's what I am. Because of that mindset, I ended up flirting around with boys. I've had many exes whom I let my heart be wasted on. I have never been single. If a boyfriend broke up with me, I find another to flirt with me. I lived my teenage life being a flirt, but I never let them touch me and sometimes that's one of the reasons why they broke up with me. I was trashed by others, they look down on me, but I felt nothing. I lost myself.
As I was fooling around, I met a graduating college student. He was one of our practice teacher. Before he became a practice teacher, we already know each other. We used to chat over the phone. We have a lot of similarities when it comes to interests and so we got close. Despite the age gap, I liked him. We hang out every now and then but he always keep me a secret. He never wants anybody to find us out. He wants to stay low from the crowd.
I know you're gonna say that after everything I've been through, I never learned my lesson. Yeah, I know. You can hate me but it's all in the past now and I've been better.
Going back to the story, I know it was a red flag keeping our relationship secret but I never mind it. I kept my mind clouded from thinking that I finally found someone I can get comfortable with. I am still such a gullible kid I wanna punch my past self.
Until he took me to a motel one time. He said we're just gonna hang out there because in that place, no one will see us. It is a huge red flag, I know what people do in a motel, but I went with him anyway. I really like him, you can say I was really blinded by this so-called love.
When we arrived, we just started watching tv. I feel awkward, of course, we're in a f*cking motel. It's the first time I felt nervous when he get closer to me. My intuition was right 'cause he started touching me. I am shivering inside, the nightmares from before is still lingering. But I distracted myself by thinking "This is for the best, this is your chance to fight your fear." (Yeah right,'for the best' my *ss.) but I still can't do it. I told him I can't and we should stop but he never listened. He started kissing me and kept touching me. I stood up and yelled "I said stop!" He became angry and that's the first time I saw him angry. He slapped me and threw me back to bed and told me "I know you want it too you dirty little slut. It's all your fault!" I was shocked. He's never like this before. I knew this was gonna happen. Regret came all over me and I started blaming myself all over again. "Yes, this is all my fault, I should just let it be. I am really just a dirtbag..." That's what I thought at that time. I felt empty all over again.
And since then, I became his s*x slave, I was afraid he'll become violent on me again if I refused. He even go for threesome sometimes. Worst, he lets me watch him have sex with other girls and tell me to masturbate on the corner. It hurts me a lot.
To this point, I began questioning myself why I always end up with these kind of guys but I also end up answering myself with "because you're a slut, a whore, a dirtbag, who wants to be with a girl who's already touched by many guys?"
I tried to commit su*c*de by cutting my wrists just to end my suffering but I ended up still living. I failed so many times that even in dying, I still failed.
I've been his s*x slave for how many years, I can't even remember. It all ended up when I finally stood up for myself and cut all communications with him. It's also an advantage when I moved out because he doesn't know where I live anymore.
He kept messaging me on social media but I always block him. I also changed my phone number. He finally stopped when I was a college student and knew better. I told him I caught STDs and I have proofs of him fooling around with minors. He was scared of STDs and his reputation being ruined. What's a f*cked up guy who always fools around but scared of STDs? Thankfully, he's a stupid f*ck who believed my lie. It's been years and he doesn't bother me anymore.
I told my story not to gain sympathy but to raise awareness and help encourage others who's experiencing the same to keep on fighting.
After everything I've experienced, I learned how to fight for myself in the end. I learned how to respond to these kind of people. I also didn't end up hating all men because I learned that there's still good men out there through my father. Besides, some girls are also capable to r*pe/s*xually assault.
This is what r*pe, s*xual harrassment/assault does to a person. We get scared, we get nightmares, we get confused, we blame ourselves. But remember, we are still capable to fight. You f*ck up the minds of the children you harrased/assaulted. It f*cks up their perspectives as a child. It's hard to fix. As I grow up, it was hard for me to regain my confidence and self-love. It was tiring and I even tried to commit su*c*de.
To all the people who experienced the same ('cause not only girls experience r*pe, don' t you ever forget that!), whether it be you're a girl or a boy or part of the lgbt, keep fighting for your life! Never give up. It was hard but I know we can get through it. I, myself, still have nightmares sometimes but I am now able to respond to it without breaking down. And most importantly, NEVER BE AFRAID TO SEEK HELP. If you need help, ask for it. There are still people who are kind-hearted. Therapy helps too! So please, don't keep it all to yourself. If you can't take it anymore, ask for help.
You can also message me if you need to. Spread love and not hate! Have a safe day.
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