#i think i got better by mid October but i didn't have enough time to do fuck all. my family moved out. lots of stuff in school also. crazy

[10hourshift]

Chapter 9

<previous -begining- next>

Español en alt

We're so back baby!! (Doesn't continue it for another month or so)

[justfonnsblog]

How they would react to seeing you in their clothes/Uniform.

Resident Evil Characters (Leon S. Kennedy, Albert Wesker, Chris Redfield, Carlos)

Edition One: He was blessed this morning.

Warnings; Fluff, leon marking y/n a bit and some kissing with a bit of suggestive things but that's it.

•。‿｡'.•。‿｡'.•。‿｡'.•。‿｡'.•

Leon S. Kennedy

He's never thought that his coat (RE4) could have looked that attractive on someone, but oh boy he realized he was wrong when he saw you.

It was still kind of early when you woke up, you tried to go back to sleep but couldn't even after multiple tries. I mean, how could you go back to sleep when there was this handsome, no, gorgeous man sleeping in front of you?

You took your time admiring his face and the parts of his body that wasn't hidden by the sheets. You smiled as you started counting the beauty marks on his soft skin, sometimes eyes lingering a bit longer on his perfectly shaped upper back and arms, since he was sleeping on his stomach. After a bit, you reached to gently move some hair out of his face to take a better look at his sleeping expression. It was peacful and soft, for a man that usually has his eyebrows pinched into an serious and intense way, it really was a nice sight to see. He always was serious around people, well except whenever he' was around you. Also, must I say that he can only sleep that well when you're around, in the bed with him.

After a moment you sit up, moving your hair out of the way so you can give his forehead a very soft peck before getting up. It was now October which meant that it was going to be kind of chilly, or rather it was. Your own arms wrapping around your petit(ish) form to try and keep some warmth, you look around for something warmer than your tanktop and little booty shorts. You quickly spot the perfect clothe, Leon's jacket, and so you walk over, pick it up and put it on snuggling into it at the warmth it immediately gives you. After zipping it high enough, you started tiptoeing away from the bedroom and into the bathroom to brush your hair and rinse your mouth, stealing a few sniffs here and then so you could smell your boyfriend's cologne on it. After doing so, you went to the kitchen to start making some coffee/hot cocoa (for the non-coffee lovers 💜) for you and Leon when he would wake up.

• •

You ended up making some breakfast after a moment, thinking, hoping that the smell would attract your boyfriend out of bed. You knew that he had just come back from a mission not too long ago, but since he was back you wanted to be with him as much as possible. You had missed him, so it was natural after all. When you were mostly done with the food and your own drink that was half gone from sipping it here and then, you heard a knock. At first you hesitated in answering or not, because instead of being at your place like you two usually do, you slept at Leon's for once.

After a bit of hesitation you decided to answer, not wanting the person to end up waking up the sleeping beauty. You pulled down the jacket to be more presentable, even though it was already down to your mid thighs, and walked over the door. “Hello, there is a package that arrived for...Mister Leon S. Kennedy.”, You heard coming from the other side of the door. You started unlocking the multiple locks that were on the door, thanks to Leon's job that made him paranoid, not that you cared or that it was important right now.

As you were doing this, you didn't know that your boyfriend had woken up, searching for you in the bed with one arm, eyes closed. When he realized that you were gone, he grunted and got up only wearing sweatpants but he didn't care. It was not like his body wasn't a body heater anyways. He was always the one to keep you warm when you got cold, since he rarely ever got really cold. He went to the bathroom quickly and when he came back out he smelled the food, leading him to the kitchen and to where you were. And when he saw you and what you were wearing, he froze for a bit, cheeks quickly warming up, lips slightly open from the surprise as he stared at you.

-

“Good morning, I know I'm not Leon Kennedy but let me take it for him. Thank you.”, You said as you smiled softly up at the man who looked like he was in his beginning 30s. He smiled back as he handed you the package which you gladly took. His eyes looked down at the big fluffy jacket you were wearing and that clearly looked way too warm for the current weather. This made his eyebrow raise as an amused chuckle escaped him and he commented. “I didn't know it was that cold already...Shouldn't you have someone war—”, He stopped talking quickly when he looked behind you. Before you could do anything, you felt two big arms wrap around your waist and pull you backward a bit into a chest, one that you knew all too well. Now you knew for sure that he was up.

Before you could even say anything to the man, Leon let out a low tired grunt into your shoulder and gave the stranger THE look, one you didn't see but clearly was meant for the man to leave asap. As soon as the mailman was nowhere to be seen anymore, Leon grumbled a small “It's cold outside, close the door...Please.”, The blonde says without making any move to pull away from you so you giggle and step backwards, closing the door with your free hand.

“Good morning big guy, what's up with you?”, You asked but then added. “Come on, let's go to the table, I made you something warm to drink.”, When he didn't pull away you knew he had no intention of pulling away from you, that'd he'd stay cuddled against your back and arms around you so you started to walk slowly toward the table, shaking your head amused. What a big baby you've got there, a very handsome one at that. Like he could hear your thought, Leon lifted his head up and stared at you from your shoulder. You turned and gave him a short kiss to which he quickly and happily answered by kissing you back, a bit more eagerly than you...well he had his reasons.

When he first saw you, in his jacket, he thought he was still dreaming. He didn't know his jacket could look so hot and you were the reason behind it. Welp, his favorite jacket will be used even more from now. He'd think about you in it every time hed look at it or get a small whiff of your smell during missions, his break and even when—ahem.

Seeing his girlfriend in the brown jacket made him feel two ways, possessive and very very attracted. Seeing you in his clothes made him realize how real your relationship was, how you were his and his only. Not going to lie, it also made his thoughts go south for a bit, till he simply let it get pushed to the side(for now) by those warm feelings, butterflies in his stomach. So of course when he saw the mailman looking at you—even if it were with no bad intentions—, he couldn't help but get possessive of you and so he did what first came to him, a glare, then become baby and get as close to you as possible. And now that he had you close he didn't want to pull away, unless...it was to get any closer to you.

You two ended up staying in front of the table for a bit, him not wanting to pull away but you ended up giving one of his arms a small tap then lovingly caressed his arm. “Le...I need to finish making the food, it's pratically done. Okay?”, You say, only for the said male to pull you a bit closer and lean to give your neck and jaw a kiss with a small displeased groan. But it quickly changed into a hitchy breath when you leaned your head to the side to give him more access, it was almost as if you were asking him to. He ended up leaving a mark or two on your soft skin so people knew who'se you were, bonus enjoying the little sounds that came out of you.

After that he leaned his forehead down against your shoulder with a sigh, trying to contain or more like control himself and all of his rushing thoughts. He finally ended up letting you go only to sit down on a chair with a small pout, drinking what you made him. He knew that his pout was an "irresistible and adorable" expression that always won you over, even if it didn't exaxtly fit his grown man's face. He would do it for you, and only you, when he wanted something. He purposely would stare at you as you finished the breakfast for the two of you, pouting everytime you glanced at him, making you know that he was unhappy with not being able to cling to you. When you didn't look, his eyes were very much looking at your outfit and the rest that perfectly (to his eyes) fitted, licking his lips a bit before rubbing his face trying not to look too much even though he already was. You knew he was staring, how could you not feel his intense stare, but you tried your best to ignore it, cheeks warming up. Oh you were so into trouble, well if you called it that. Not that you minded the trouble when it came to him.

As soon as you were done and had the two plates in hands, he moved the chair beside his closer meaning he wanted you to sit right by his side. You wanted to tease him a bit more by not sitting, but his face made your heart waver and you gave in to his demand. You smiled and sat down by him, putting the food down as his arm quickly found your waist and he pulled you close. He then hugged you to him with both arms, face snuggling into the crook of your neck as he said in a loving voice. “Thank you for....Being with me still. Don't ever...Leave me please. And also...You can wear my jacket anytime.”, At the last sentence, he leaned his head back up and glanced away cheeks becoming a small tint of pink(well more than they already were).

That only made you smile more and wrap both arms around his neck, one hand going into his hair, leaning close to his face. “You know, I'm the most thankful, thank you for choosing me when you could literally just get any other girls in the world...I love you Leon S Kennedy...”, You whispered the end, inching closer to his face till he closed the distance and kissed you first. It was full of love, tenderness, and a hint of desire. You kissed for a bit till you two pulled away to breath, his forehead ending on yours as he whispered back. “What do you mean? I'm the luckiest guy ever. Couldn't ask for better, for any other girl. Although...You're a bit of a tease.”

And here was his signature teasing grin, the slight tiredness making it even more attractive, but you still rolled your eyes playfully at him. “What? I was colldd.”, You said before laughing softly at the "are you serious, with my jacket?" face he was making. “Okay, okay I might have wanted to try it on too....But its a small reason why.”, you said while showing your fingers that were almost touching, it being that much only. He shook his head and leaned back for a kiss only for you to put your finger between his lips and yours, smiling playfully at him, eyes glittering the same way. “Woah there Le, we need to eat before it gets cold. And I say....Firstonetofinisheatinggetstochoosewhatwedotoday.”, you said the last sentence quickly only purpose before starting eating not letting him time to understand what you said.

When Leon realized what you said, he gasped in false offense at you cheating and started eating first. You didn't look at him but from how he was speaking you knew he was grinning. “You really chose the wrong opponent y/n, baby you will never win against me.”, You two really were going at it, fighting over who gets to choose what you were going to do....Even though, inside you both knew what was going to happen after and that was not only because of him, but what you secretly meant to do too that morning.

And how you guys had so much fun, how you were able to make that Agent laugh and do childish things with you only meant two things. You were meant for him and you were the light of his existence, one he never would want to seperate from...Especially not when he gets to get very close to you. ;)

———

I apologize for any of the grammar errors I might have done, English is not my first language. 🙏

Liking or/and Reblogging if you liked would mean so much to me, letting me know you enjoyed what I wrote. 🥺

[fluidstatick]

Dear Left-of-Center American,

So you're not in a swing state, you hate the electoral system we've got, and you want to cast a protest vote, or abstain entirely.

Consider this:

If you vote blue, you suck the joy out of the other guy voting red.

Walk with me --

Biden's terrible, you said, repeatedly, last week. He's always been terrible. And I don't disagree with you. He's done a lot of bad things. There's blood on his hands. That's true of every president America has ever had. (Yes, Carter too. Don't get distracted. Stay with me, here.)

Now that Biden's dropped out, you still don't want to vote. Harris has done a lot of shady things. You point to Haiti, California's prisons, her voting record on various and sundry policies that you like or don't like. But I'm looking you in the eyes. I'm holding out my hands. I'm asking you, gently, to step away from the receipts and look at the basic arithmetic of the two party system.

Yknow that person? The one that looks at you funny, like you're either pitiable or disgusting -- Yeah, that one. Maybe you can think of a few. The terven evangelical lady who won't stop sending you anons about gender essentialism and hellfire. The old man you keep running into on the city bus, who loudly scoffs to the guy two seats over "these damn liberals have no shame anymore." The college jock with the massive lifted pickup truck covered in maga stickers. The grey suited board member on c-span who stares dead-eyed at nothing while one of your comrades tries to explain to him why he should care about other people. You know the ones.

Those people vote. They love voting. If they go to church, their clergy encourages them to make godly decisions at the polls. It's a sacred privilege, but it's also fun for them. They love their superhero candidate. They're voting for International Prom King. They're simping over their man so hard it's their entire personality from May to the following January and beyond.

Those people that don't like you started planning for the 2024 election the moment they understood they couldn't scream and curse Joe out of the white house. This is every competitive sport on earth combined for them. They vote because they love the idea of helping their guy score the ultimate super mega touchdown of all time. These people gameify their elections. They're giddy about watching results pour in.

When I was very small, I listened to my lifelong democrat parents criticize Bush Sr. They didn't think I understood what they were talking about, but I knew the man was powerful and was making decisions that made things more difficult for people. I watched Bill Clinton make life easier for my parents, and Americans like them, for eight solid years. (Yes, I learned about bombs and lobbyists and oil subsidies, too. Don't get distracted.) I watched Gore lose the 2000 election, slowly and painfully over the course of weeks. I learned about gerrymandering and voter suppression and swing states and delegates.

And then. When I was in my late teens, too naive to know better, I dated a staunch conservative. The first presidential election I was old enough to participate in was 2004. I was living with the aforementioned conservative. When our voter's pamphlets arrived in the mail in mid October he handed mine to me and said, grimly, "You're gonna vote for Kerry, aren't you?"

I said "of course I am."

He tossed his voter's pamphlet in the trash and said "See, you liberals annoy me. What's the point of me doing my civic duty as an American id you're just going to cancel it out by voting for a socialist?"

(Kerry was not a socialist.)

Bush won a second term in 2004. It wasn't nearly as close as Bush/Gore, because Americans were still deeply paranoid about terrorism, preoccupied with Iraq, Afghanistan, and Syria. Kerry ran on economics. Bush ran on Islamophobia. But I pissed off my conservative boyfriend, his parents, and half of his friends. We broke up not long after that.

And my point is: If you can't convince yourself to show up at the polls in support of the Democratic nominee, and you can't imagine your deeply red state flupping blue, or your historically blue state drifting purple: Imagine looking your most obnoxious bigoted neighbor in the eye and telling them "I voted for the one you don't like. If you think about it, it's like you didn't vote at all."

Is that how voting works? Of course not. Will it piss em off? Yeah, probably.

Vote to spite an asshole with a punchable face, if you want. Just fuckin' vote.

[kilroyart]

As a yearly tradition at this point. I put on a special Halloween DnD one-shot. This year in particular there were enough people interested from outside my normal group that I had enough for two full parties. Friends of friends or co-workers that were interested in seeing what all the talk was about. I couldn't possibly have 10 people at my table, not including myself. So I split them in to two separate days, for the Saturday and Sunday before Halloween.

Now I take great care in crafting a theme for the one-shot. I think about it way ahead of time. This year I got my inspiration through an nothing in particular conversation with my girlfriend who mentioned the phrase "mimic house". It was a spark in my mind immediately and had to play it cool and not explode with enthusiasm, as she would be one of the future players. Since mid-August I plotted and schemed and researched and homebrewed.

By early September my premise was set and a whole Mimic theme was set forth. Now I knew the jig would be up if everything they encountered was a mimic in different forms. Instead I scrounged for monsters which appear mundane until they decide to strike. Vine blights, animated armors, and of course a standard mimic chest made their way in.

The mystery was set up to look like a haunting. Some noble's manor was experiencing supernatural threats. Any and all poltergeist type manifestations still work, especially if everything is mimicry. The progression was structured by finding the correct keys for the correct doors or locks. Any attempts at picking were futile, as the lock simple moved the pins out of the way making it impossible. I banked on my player's better judgement to not try battering down doors, which paid off. Find the key, unlock the door to find the next key.

At the end they found the hidden sub-basement. The house's heart dangled. Tendons would lash out and attack the players. After a bit of damage on the heart, the entire house would reveal itself to be a gargantuan mimic and run off.

The boss fight took place in the woods as the mimic house thrashed about. The wooden siding and shingles were invulnerable, but the fleshy underside was exposed. The heart itself was vulnerable to slashing and piercing damage, balancing the fight for the lv 6 party. The only way to fight it was to get underneath the house. That is also where the mimic could whip with its tendrils or thrust jagged wooden planks.

It was a great time, across two very different parties. It was also very interesting seeing how different groups approached the same problems; I have never run the same campaign twice. Everyone enjoyed the classic mimic chest, carefully hidden in the attic, and all were blown away by the surprise and scale of the mimic house.

P.S. Credit to the movie Monster House for its unconscious influence. I didn't realize the resemblance or remember the movie until early October when I mentioned the concept to a friend (who was not a player) and they brought it up. Love that movie.

[mysticalsoot]

an angel to you

my wilma debut and a happy birthday to my sister, lillylvjy!!

➸ note; i am making this post literally the day before and i am so excited so if this is posted on the 30th instead of the 31st then know lillys birthday is the 31st of october and i just got too excited

➸ pairing; witch!wilma soot x gn!reader

➸ summary; you and wilma live outside of a small town and on an off day decide to have a sleepy day in

➸ warning; fluff, fluff, fluff. maybe implied age gap? dont remember. a gay guy writing for a woman is enough of a warning i think.

➸ age-rating; 14+

➸ wordcount; 1.1k

main masterlist

the city may have been nice for a while, nice and busy and bustling, with plenty to do and see--yet there was something serene about a cottage in the woods by a small town with less than 8k occupants. it was always quiet, and cozy and the weather was stunning. how the snow fell and weighed on the leaves during the winter, or how the rain pattered on the roof, echoing through the house.

but your favorite part about it all, was wilma. she was like a moon to you, lighting your path in the dark without an overwhelming brightness. she was balance, you thought. the mid ground between mysterious and bubbly. a beautiful artist as well and maybe an even better witch.

she was greatly talented in everything she did, she could bake anything and everything, come up with any spell and perform it flawlessly and each of her paintings were better than any masterpiece that may have been deemed the 'best' throughout history. she was wonderful.

when you met her, you didn't actually intend on meeting her. in fact, you stumbled upon both the neighboring town and her cottage completely on accident. the same happened with your brother and his meeting with wilma's brother, you still wonder if both wilma and wilbur intended for you both to meet, but you never worried too much about it.

you and your brother aidan had left your home in the city to sort of travel in the more rural areas of the country, mostly searching for your ancestry. wherever your magic had come from since neither of your parents knew. they theorized it might've been your mother's side, but no one spoke of it so it wasn't clear. plus, wasn't it time to go on your own? at least in a way, you and aidan were inseparable, so leaving home was always done together.

you never found a very sound answer on your family's history with magic, although you're still searching. through your time living with wilma, you've found ways to harness your powers and control them much better. she teaches you everything she knows, and she's a wonderful teacher at that.

it's one of the colder days of the season, around mid october and most of the leaves have already fallen from the trees, laying on the ground and any surface they touch. on the porch, and the stairs, the roof and the old car that wilma still has (it's older than you both).

she had left early in the morning to go into town, you weren't fully conscious, at least enough to make out what she said but all you could gather is she had some errands to run. she kissed your forehead and left moments later, leaving you to sleep the morning away.

you were still waking up when you heard the door click open, smiling to yourself you hopped up out of bed and venturing to the living areas.

"hey, baby," wilma smiles back, a soft chuckle at your disheveled state slipping past her lips, "sleep well?"

you hum, rubbing your eyes before glancing at the paper grocery bags she holds in her hands.

"what do you have there, wilm?" you patter over to her, standing in the doorway of the kitchen as you watch her unpack. mostly herbs and spices, and some other random witchy things. new incense and candles.

"did you forget your lessons, love?" she muses, organizing everything in the cabinet she holds all of her materials.

"sorta," you hum, shrugging as you wrap your arms around her from behind, resting your face on her back as you sigh out.

"don't worry, they're tomorrow. wil's bringing aidan over," you nod softly against her, playing with the hem of her shirt as she pulls away to face you.

"can we just rest today?"

wilma nods, leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead before guiding you over to the couch so you can rest while she whips up a quick breakfast. you don't pay too close attention on what she does, glancing over at her every once and a while despite the way your eyes get heavy and begin to droop.

she smiles at you, glancing over at your resting form. you're not quite asleep but you're close enough. she makes quick work in the kitchen, flipping the pancakes and plating them quietly.

"darling, breakfast," she murmurs, placing breakfast on the table as she smiles at you a moment later. you walk over, sitting down beside her as you both begin to eat, "why dont you take a nap after breakfast, mm? we'll put on a movie and you can just rest. how's that sound?" she croons, kissing your temple as she gathers your plates.

"sounds like heaven," you mumble, getting up to follow her, helping her clean up the dishes before you both get settled on the couch. she clicks on a movie you've both watched a thousand times, letting you lay comfortably over her lap as she pulls out her sketchbook to doodle in while you rest.

you watch as she sketches quietly, a soft smile on her lips as you let your eyes droop closed again, letting sleep take you back. wilma admires you gently, hand rubbing your stomach and fingers tracing over your skin.

she lets you rest, pulling you to lay on top of her as she falls asleep with you. you subconsciously wrap your arms around her waist in your unconscious state, which earns and a smile and an awe from her.

you both enjoyed the serenity and peace of these moments, the time that you both could drown out the world with simple moments shared privately between you both.

you weren't sure how much time had passed once you began to stir, slowly waking up. you smile the moment you feel wilma's chest rise and fall below you, her still hands tangled into your hair where she must've been playing with it. you sit yourself up, curling your legs up against your chest as you silently admire her. the way her hair is sprawled around her face, or how her lips make a soft 'o' shape as she snores. you hum to yourself, before your eyes glance over at her sketchbook, open and facing up.

you take it into your hands, admiring the drawing she must've drawn while you slept. her love for you always amazed you, since you never could quite grasp someone loving you so wholly and in such a deep manner as wilma did. you were her muse in most everything she did and she absolutely adored you. she was devoted to you almost as much as you were her. you loved every second of it.

and in this moment, with her asleep beside you and a physical example of her love and devotion, you felt you might as well be in heaven, and be as loved as you could ever be.

you think wilma is your own angel, and that's the truth, anyone can see.

taglist; @lcvejoy @lillylvjy @ella-fella-bo-bella @lotusanonymouse @willgoldszn @whos-nicooo @zebonos @charlieisverybored

[localrye]

LADS I'M BACK AGAIN! Kind of! My nerves are fucked again! c': (personal ramblings ahead)

I had a big three weeks since like mid-June till early July So first I went to this hardcore fest I mentioned last month, and it was fine, but I found that fests aren't really for me. I'm glad I went because now I know. I guess I may attend again but buy only one-day ticket in the future but idk if I'll want to honestly, maybe only if some band I really like would play. Guess the only fest I'm still interested in is K-Town but that'd be different coz I would be sleeping at my friend's house in a town nearby, so at least I'd get some *peace and quiet* far away from people and only come to the fest for the bands. But yea, it was kind of overwhelming and uncomfortable. Completely unlike venue gigs, which feel intimate and comfortable and make me feel very present and like I'm a part of this scene. Fest was just chaotic, and since there was no breaks in-between sets I feel like all bands blent into one, I literally don't feel like I made any memories beside discomfort. And also almost everyone was drunk, which of course was to be expected and I know that getting wasted is the point of fests for many people and it's fine, but just not a space for me and it definitely contributed to the discomfort; I'm really glad my friend who was there with me also doesn't drink alcohol. But I got cassettes and a vinyl from bands and distros so that's nice!!

Then after I came back, I only had 3 days before leaving again to visit my best friend to go to some Pride events, a Xiao & Speedway gig and a bonfire on which I was supposed to play mandolin. Pride was nice as usual, I think I looked pretty faggy at the main parade but I'm def getting some chained harness for the next year, I'm brave enough for that by now lmao But neither the gig or the bonfire happened!!! :/ The gig was cancelled like 3 hours before it was supposed to happen coz bands' plane was delayed. And bonfire didn't happen coz one person couldn't attend and I couldn't play mando coz my fucking...... nerve issues in the right arm came back...... But it was still great, I love my best friend, we had such a lovely time, love just spending time with them!! Heals my accumulated mental damage lmao

And since I came back I've been waiting for my nerves to heal, not doing much, which is very annoying coz I got only like, 3 months since the last time I couldn't use my hand. It's really difficult to accept new disabilities, especially when they're still pretty new and you don't know what you can and can't do yet. But I guess I know a bit better now. Definitely can't spend a few days in a row writing down the chords and playing an instrument, definitely can't do any strength-based activities like lifting heavy objects multiple times a day or doing push-ups and I definitely need a longer stick for my aro flag so I don't have to raise my hands at all!

Honestly I'm still pretty upset about the gig not happening coz like I said, the fest just blurred into one, so I feel like I haven't been at any actual show this summer! (and also I REALLY wanted to see Xiao) Thank fuck Frail Body plays here at the beginning of August coz I wouldn't go at any gig before October otherwise!! But it sucks to live in the middle of nowhere, having to travel 2 to 4 hours to see a gig, pay a lot of fucking money for the train tickets and having to always figure out the place to sleep coz no trains go back to my county from the cities past like, 19:30 lmao

But anyway, guess I can try to come back on tumblr again, I miss my blog!! My hand is still doing bad, it'll probably take at least one month till it's fine again. I hope only a month!

[disease-danger-darkness-silence]

I'm rereading the Meet Death Sitting series by @bomberqueen17 because I never read the side stories and, let me tell you, it is surreal remembering that a lot of these were written during the early days of the 2020 part of the COVID pandemic. It took me back. I was so scared during those days, and angry.

When the lockdown went into effect (and Nevada was one of the first ones to implement it), my sister was in prison for a nonviolent, first-time offense: embezzling from a multi-billion dollar international gaming company. So... Unjustifiably, imo. I think theft crimes should be weighted by who you stole from and how much it effected them. And frankly, they weren't paying her enough to survive on, and she supervised TWO sports books.

She got sentenced in January and for some reason couldn't appeal, and then lockdown happened in March.

They were doing NOTHING for the prisoners.

She was in the Las Vegas prison doing hard labor in 125°+ weather and they weren't even providing a decent amount of calories to eat each day, let alone masks and hand sanitizer. She lost 100 lbs in prison, in a deeply unhealthy way.

A woman with a mental instability smuggled in a razor blade that she would hold in her cheek, next to her teeth, and when Ashley reported it, they did nothing. Ashley got transferred to a different bloc at some point because she was going to be doing food service work (she has a culinary education), but someone did get hurt by that woman. No consequences came for any of the COs (correction officers) or the warden.

Oh, and then they yanked Ash out of food prep and into heavy labor. Not sure why, because we got her records and there's no citations or anything on there. They just did it. I'm PERSONALLY assuming it's because I was calling daily demanding to talk to the warden or the supervisor on duty to demand better treatment. FFS, they were feeding them grade B, not fit for human consumption food. I was calling everyone I could think of and generally making a nuisance of myself, during a global pandemic, and while advocating for Ashley I also began advocating for her fellow prisoners. I wrote to the governor. I wrote to the Nevada Department of Corrections. I spent 8 hours a day harassing state officials (and politely talking to state workers who don't get paid enough for this shit), and I'm pretty sure her getting hard labor was punishment for her daring to have someone on the outside willing to make life a living hell for themselves and others for her.

We all nearly bankrupted ourselves keeping money on her books so she could buy extra food and special soap because she has a skin condition and they just give you harsh lye soap (no shampoo, no conditioner) at the Florence McClure Women's Correctional Center. She has an IUD that stops her periods so luckily she didn't need tampons the whole time she was there, because they ration them and if you need more, you'd better have some money to buy shitty dollar store ones at Target prices! (IIRC Ashley took her allotment and shared them around.)

We illegalized private prisons in Nevada a few years back but they acted like they still were one. You had to work or you couldn't apply for parole. They sold dollar store products at a massive markup. They didn't give her medical care for all but the last month or two she was there, and that meant she didn't have her ANTIDEPRESSANTS for most of the time. She was suicidal and depressed and anxious and most of all, she missed her daughter - my niece, who got displaced to live with my sister's ex-husband, who is an alcoholic, abusive bastard who supports Trump and used to make Ashley set an alarm on her phone so he'd remember when to beat her. That's who my niece had to go live with. He was mostly sober by then, but she was clearly miserable and every time she came to stay with Mom for visitation, she didn't want to go back.

Ashley spent 10 months in there before getting parole in mid October of 2020 - for a first-time embezzling offense that was the equivalent of stealing $5 or $10 from someone in the middle class. (Also adding, the Gaming Board DID NOT ASK for imprisonment, they wanted her on probation so she could get a job and do restitution. The guy who talked her into it? The abuser who found a domestic violence victim and manipulated her? He got probation, and it was his fourth gaming offense.)

The entire time, I was organizing book drives and fundraisers and harassing state officials to do something - some of you remember this, because some of you helped by sending her books and money, and I still cannot thank you enough. To this day, I go to bed every night thankful for you all.

But I was spending my daylight hours, and a lot of my nighttime hours, trying to fight for her. Her voice wasn't being heard so I would damn well amplify it.

A lot of the women there shouldn't have been. Nonviolent drug offenses that clearly needed psychiatric care and not imprisonment. A woman who killed her husband in self defense, caught on tape, but still imprisoned. Another woman who's boyfriend was dealing meth and she got the guilt by association thing - never came up dirty, complied in every way, and they threw the book at her. Prison should be for 1st and 2nd degree murderers, rapists, violent abusers, torturers, organized criminals, people who molest and groom children. Not these women. It was heartbreaking. I knew it was bad, but now I had secondhand experience and I would never wish that on anyone but the most heinous of human beings.

I had nightmares almost every night that Ashley would catch COVID and die, or that she'd figure out a way to kill herself. I didn't wake Raven (my partner, for those who may have forgotten) when I had them. I just read a little bit of fic, and then cried myself back to sleep.

_____________

I don't know that I ever thanked @bomberqueen17. She's been through a lot the last few years (including something I can empathize with - a parent death. I miss my dad terribly. It's been 7 and a half years and I still feel his loss). But... I never thanked her for getting me through 2020 in mostly one piece.

It was her fics that I read when I woke up after a nightmare. It was her fics that I read in the mornings as I woke up, drank coffee or an energy drink, and got my day started to begin campaigning against Nevada's DOC. It was her fics that calmed me down in between calls and it was her fics I read to keep from crying when my sister called me. I'd read excerpts to her (she hadn't seen the Witcher yet but she still laughed at the right spots) and I'd try to keep her cheered up by telling her about fandom stuff.

Like yes, I read other fics and authors. But it was her fics that made a difference and, I think, are the reason Ashley and I were fortified enough to fight for her rights.

So.... A very belated thank you, @bomberqueen17. I don't know that I could have survived that, in addition to everything else 2020 threw at us, without your writing.

Also thank you for this very succinct explanation of why significant age gaps can sometimes present a problem, in a way that isn't denigrating to those with youth. I've been trying to explain it to my 23-year-old for years, and others, but now I will just use this.

You're the best. I can't wait to read the rest of the series.

[always-thirsty-pocket]

I had a pretty crappy Halloween but an overall pretty good-ish october... i'm not ready for it to end.

Ever since I reached my twenties and my friends and I decided we were all too old to trick or treat, October was such a sad time of the year for me because I use to love it so much. It started feeling like it was just any other day, except my brother put out dumb cheap ass decorations, despite us never getting trick-or-treaters, living in poor neighborhoods all our lives. The season just felt like having a birthday that nobody remembered ( a feeling I know well enough ), I would still get into costume, but that essentially equaled me sitting in a room alone playing video games in cosplay and nothing else.

Three years ago I decided I was going to reclaim the season for myself. I originally planned to watch classic horror movies every day of the month. I got a late start, because I didn't decide this until I made an impulse buy of some Universal Classic Monsters DVDs mid way through the month. So I ended up watching well into December.

Two years ago I changed it up to include 80's slasher movies, while still trying to get to all the Universal Monster films And that year I was still watching those movies well into November at least.

Last year was a very hard time for me, the threat of eviction was looming over my head. I was actually hoping to buy a bunch of Halloween decorations for my bedroom, which was pretty huge at the time. I got my decor, but didn't get the chance to use it... I did get to watch movies though. And my tradition kept mostly the same, but I decided not to do every single Universal Monster movie, and added a few movies from Hammer films and other sources, and even some more contemporary movies, and a few TV shows like Tales from the Crypt and the Munsters. A friend of mine even sent a fairly large box full of candy, and extra decorations. It made that horrible time easier to cope through. But not long after Halloween, we were suddenly rushed out the door. And in the new house, I was still in the mood for spooks, I felt a bit robbed, and continued watching into Nobember.

This year, I am in a much better place, and so I got to start my tradition on time, and decorate up my room, I got special lighting. Instead of strictly watching movies, I downloaded a shit ton of TV shows and cherrypicked the Halloween specials, and added even more to my backlog of movies to watch. My friend sent me another Halloween candy box. I've been playing spooky themed games ( with interruptions from Mario and Sonic, how dare they release new games in October ), It's generally been a very good time, despite today actually not being a very good Halloween... I am once again, not ready for it to end. I hate saying goodbye to the October month, even though it has historically been very sad for me in my adult life. I reclaimed the shit out of this Holiday. I love it now.

I guess that's the point of this post, if anyone out there is still reading.

If you have a time of the year that isn't the greatest for you, especially if it was something you loved in the past, I think it would be a good use of your time to reclaim it, make it self indulgent and special, even if the only one to enjoy it is you.

I'm doing the same thing for christmas. My extended family doesn't care about us and my immediate family is kind of a mess so it's not a great time for me either, but the decorations, the TV and movies, the seasonal foods, and yes even the music, they make me happy. So I'm going to indulge in those too. If my room were large enough, I'd have my own pint sized tree to decorate with whatever I want.

[kingkaratejohnnylawrence]

Played Killer Frequency the other day and finished it last night, I know there's a photo of Peggy on the wall of the survivors/deceased at the end of the game but I decided to experiment a little bit and see what I could come up with, I know she doesn't have long enough hair to be tied up like that (As it's short and kind of bouncy in the silhouette you see when she's in her booth but I was bored) I was going to HC she was older than Forrest but her personnel file puts her birthday in 1959 (Forrest being born in 1940) so I made other HCs to make up for it! SPOILERS BELOW IN THE FIRST PARAGRAPH!! Had this idea that when she was in the school sports hall (tricked into going there) she was attacked by Marie Campbell (One of the killers/her sister) but her injuries were quickly treated by Teddy Gallows Jr who was kidnapped alongside her once Marie ran from the police (Peggy still thinks Teddy is a jerk) and she was taken care of properly by paramedics who came from Henderson which Leslie brought over alongside more police as Gallows Creek's officers were deceased (Sheriff Matthews and Martinez), though Martinez could be a survivor if you make the right choice during the start but I ended up getting her killed and Leslie who had to drive out 6 hours (3 hours there and back) just to get backup which meant Forrest Nash was the 911 operator for the night. Another HC I have is that Peggy's way of dealing with it was talking to Forrest because she knew he would know how she felt and also went to Roller Ricky's because skating kept her distracted and she got to see Max the dog which she deemed better than going to an actual therapist. Playing the game made me think of how similar it was to Scream so another HC I imagine is Peggy went to see Scream in 1996 and was reminded of the events that happened on the night of the murders (The 3rd of September 1987) but she wasn't too affected anymore but still told Forrest (He made a joke and Peggy laughed about it). OTHER NON PEGGY HCs: -Gallows Creek discovered the Gallows family were corrupt and voted again for Linda Cartwright to be mayor as they didn't want someone like Teddy in charge. -1987 was the last time The Whistling Man night "tradition" happened although the kids will most likely bring it up from time to time much to the annoyance of the other residents (mainly the survivors). -The only time Gallows Creek deemed it "acceptable" for people to dress as TWM was Halloween and even then a group of people somehow convince Mayor Cartwright to pass a law that the people dressed as the killer must sign a document between the 28th-30th of October with their home addresses just in case and then have it sent to the police station. -Leslie became the new Sheriff mid October and trained new recruits since there wasn't anyone else in the force and by the start of November, the police force has a total of 60 officers (She offered Forrest a spot but he declined). -Ponty's pizza still does exist of course (He still likes calling the KFAM radio station hoping to promote his place).

[reno-the-himbo-turk]

update time/day pt 1

Okay so I feel the need to post an update for everyone. Where have you been/whats been going on with the lack of activity? Okay so this answer is several fold. Firstly back in September I had to put my ESA cat down named Princess. I had her since winter 2011, she was found by my parents on the parking lot of their job. She had to be put down because she had lung cancer that was causing blood clots and she could no longer walk or jump without stumbling/falling over and her heart was not strong enough for treatment. I spent close to 2k USD on her treatment and ensuring she passed comfortably and that didn't include getting her a nice urn as I don't know what I want to do with the ashes a whopping 7 months later. I then spent the rest of September and all of October mourning heavily. Eating/Drinking and everything fell to the waist side. It did not help that my family was trying to be supportive in the wrong ways and then screaming/bitching me out for getting upset at their idea of support. November I had extra days off preplanned because of daylight savings time so I found and made myself a tattoo appointment to get her name and pawprint tattooed on me in memory. I did that and originally i'd planned on waiting until December to try and recoup more money since two grand is a lot of money. My therapist didn't think i'd wait that long and despite some for lack of a better term personal shaming in a discord server where someone was talking about "how they prefer to give time to mourn the animal and treat them as their own person" The day after I got my tattoo I took a bunch of donations to an animal shelter and figured i'd look around. That was when I saw him. This sad little kitten with a cone and only 3 little legs looking so broken in a cage and stitches where the 4th leg should've been, he pawed at me and caught my jacket when they were trying to take him out to clean the cage. I filled out the forms and met with him and he curled up right in my lap in between exploring and I knew then and there I needed to take him home with me. After that he came home with me and the healing slowly began. The rest of the adults in the house love him and the dogs are scared of him for some reason. Come mid to late November I got really really sick. I was sick for over three weeks and the doctors didn't do much of anything. First week I tried OTC, second week I broke down and went to the doctor and they said have a cough suppressant but no real meds because of (insert medical condition you have) but then offered me medical advice that goes against my medical condition. Week three I went and saw a different doctor in tears who wrote me a script for an antibiotic and sent me on my way. I sort of got better for maybe a week or two before someone else close to me got sick and then I got sick again. This time I went to the doctor right away because OTC meds were fucking with my eyesight and the male nurse/receptionist was having a mini melt down on my behalf and as it turns out there is a giant ass note in my medical file that i'm FUCKING ALLERGIC to them. The doctor pretty much told me to keep taking OTC meds but did give me an antibiotic script this time. This time it took another 3 weeks to get better. Part 2

[just-a-music-and-poetry-lover]

just a little vent

TW: suicide

During my last year of highschool (which just ended), I met a boy, let's call him John, a year younger than me during badminton practice. This was mid-October. We bonded over the fact that none of us was remotely good at it.

I'm from Portugal, John is Brazilian (both countries speak the same language, just different accents). After practice, I heard him tell a friend about speaking Polish. I'm saying this because I remember being jealous of this guy. From basically an hour of interacting with him, I knew that Portugal was, at least, the third country he had lived in. He knew a third language. I always "resented" the fact that I only spoke Portuguese and English. I already admired him.

When I got home, I had a follow request on insta. It was John. I followed back and took a look at his story. And I've never been the same after that.

He had reposted a story of someone from another school who had been at the release of white balloons into the sky. I don't know if this is universal, but here, that's mostly a homage to someone who died. The next story was just a plain text of him thanking everyone who had reached out to him because of his brother.

John's brother had died, and I never would have guessed it. If one of my sisters had died, I wouldn't even be able to go to school. Wait, the story's not over.

Curiosity killed the cat, isn't that what they say? Well, that day, I learned a thing or two about misplaced curiosity.

Since my younger sister is much more social than me, I asked her if she had heard of anyone in that specific school that had died. Then I showed her the white balloons. She told me: "yeah, I heard of that. A guy from there killed himself last week."

Let me tell you, I felt sick. I feel sick just recalling the memories and thinking about this whole situation.

Then she asked me how had I heard of it. And I said: "I think I met his brother today."

Of course, this is all terrible, especially because I've known John for almost a year now and every time I see him, I can see that no smile of his is real. After I learned about what happened, that was all I could see when I looked at him.

As someone who has dealt with suicidality for years now, this whole thing shook me. John and his brother were all I could think about. I would live every possible scenario in my mind of how that kid could've killed himself and I would vomit after that, disgusted with myself. But it was a cycle.

What did I do to deal with all of that, you might ask? I wrote poems. I never talked to anyone about the extent of how I related and how affected this story left me. Much less to John. I don't think he knows that I know. So I had to write about it. I wrote about how, in a parallel universe, I would've been the one to die and John's brother would be the one to grieve and write about a guy he never even met. I wrote about John's grief, what I could see of it.

It wasn't much, but I started picking up on things. John's brother died a couple of months before they turned 16. Yeah, they were twins. John didn't throw a birthday party. Things like that.

After writing, I started feeling better about this. Then my birthday came, and I was thrown back to square one. I met up with my cousins that day. I was already feeling shitty because of an unrelated issue, but it eventually got worse in every way.

My father joined us for part of the conversation and, somehow, it led to my old man explaning how water basically turns to stone if you hit it hard/fast enough. One of my cousins suddenly remembered something.

He had heard some people in his school talk about a guy, who was about our age, who had jumped off one of the bridges over my city's river. Apparently, at the funeral, the family had let the casket open. My cousin said: "I wasn't there, but someone who was told me that every inch of skin was bruised."

This rang a bell, but I didn't want to presume. I asked my cousin if he knew which school had the boy attended and when had it happened. It all matched. Now, not only was I haunted by the knowledge that I knew this guy's brother, was friends with him, had exchanged favorite Taylor Swift songs with him, I also knew exactly how he had died.

Bonus: do you think I ever looked at the river the same way? Not a chance. It used to be so much fun, now I can only pitcure someone jumping and falling off the bridge.

Anyway, that was the vent. You can ask questions, I'll answer if I can. Thank you for reading. No tags because this is not a call for attention.

[ms-demeanor]

Hey you obviously don't have to answer this, it's non of my business, but I'm curious. Is not living with your MIL an option for you, or are you stuck with her for the foreseeable future because one party has nowhere to go or something? Because she sounds like a NIGHTMARE.

Deep breath: So in 2018 we were living with my In-Laws because we were helping to care for Large Bastard's dad, who had cancer. In September of 2018 my mom died, and then in October of 2018 his dad died. And then in January of 2019 Large Bastard lost his job. And then in February of 2019 Large Bastard had a heart attack and a quadruple bypass and we stayed with his mom, because obviously we hadn't had time to look around for apartments or other jobs and he needed to recover. In July of 2019 (so four months after a quadruple bypass I love this absolutely insane asshole what the fuck) he was applying for work all over the Southwest and he helped his brother move to NorCal as a stop on a series of interviews he was doing in Colorado and Utah. In October of 2019 he got hired by a company in Las Vegas and he moved there in November and started renting a house from his cousin. I was supposed to follow in February and then covid hit so I was living with MiL and visiting Large Bastard and taking stuff to the house then I was there for a visit/moving weekend in May and when I showed up he was like "oh good, I think I need to go to the hospital!" and he went to the hospital with what we now know was worsening heart failure so he ended up spending may and june of 2020 in the hospital and I had sort of accidentally moved because I thought that was just going to be a long weekend trip so all I had was my remote work setup (glad I didn't quit my job in november, let me tell you!) and about a third of my clothes, I didn't even have my dog. So in July of 2019 I went back and got the dog and the rest of the stuff because Large Bastard was finally stable enough to be left alone for a whole night, and during that same month my dad moved to texas with my sister and started renting his house in LA to my cousin (this comes up later) and for a while stuff was pretty cool and, sure, his boss was an even bigger asshole than my boss and sure the country was basically on fucking fire but it seemed like he was not actively dying and we weren't living with his mom so you take what you can get, you know? Then he lost his job in September and his boss had never started his health insurance in Vegas but also Large Bastard had never cancelled his health insurance from California so when he was supposed to have follow-up appointments he couldn't get it covered - he could get ER care but not other care - so also in September he drove back to LA to see his cardiologists and stuff and was there for about a week before he was hospitalized again and told me not to come, to stay in Vegas, and there was a bunch of back and forth and basically we decided "you say in LA until you've worked with your doctors to get more stable, I'll stay in Vegas and keep things going with the house, when you're better you can come back to Vegas and find a different job" and then in December he ended up hospitalized again and they diagnosed him with cirrhosis and I decided I was going to come stay with him until he started to get a bit more stable but keep renting the house so I showed up in late December and went back to Vegas for a week at a time in January and February and then in mid February he had a consultation with a transplant center and they hospitalized him that day and he got put on the transplant list and then got put on life support and it became pretty fucking clear that we weren't going back to vegas (because he needs to stay within a certain distance of the transplant center for a pretty long time after the transplant) so I rent a storage unit in LA and start moving back everything from Vegas and then after only a month on the transplant list HOLY SHIT he gets a match and has a heart and a liver transplanted and I'm coming to see him every night after work and then making two trips to vegas each weekend to load our truck up with stuff and there's some pressure from his cousins because they want to sell the house so I manage to get stuff out by april 21st and the house is sold on april 23rd holy shit that was fast and he's still in the hospital recovering until

May, and then is re-hospitalized in June, and then is re-hospitalized in July and now it is October and he has not been hospitalized or needed to use a walker or a wheelchair in months but he still has really frequent appointments at the hospital in LA and the dude he used to work for in LA has a contract job that he takes and so we have to get our garage set up as a workshop for him because he's been evicted from the shop that he had that he hadn't been in since July of 2019 because he was too sick but that I couldn't break down and start moving by myself and in September he's finally feeling well enough to start moving that stuff and I'm clearing out shed space at my dad's house and working on cramming even more stuff into our storage unit and that brings us to now and

Basically we have to stay in southern california in order to stay close to the transplant center for at least a couple years after the surgery; if my cousin wasn't renting my dad's house I'd be renting my dad's house so at the moment the plan is to stay with MiL until my cousin puts an offer on a house of her own (and who the hell knows when that's going to happen but my dad is renting it to her at way under market so that she can save for a down payment but this is also weird because I'm the pariah child in my family so if he rents it to me it's at a much higher price but fuck, she's got two little kids and she's an elementary school teacher so it's not like I'm going to begrudge her inexpensive housing) so because at the moment I do not make enough money to afford both the cost of a 1-bedroom dog-friendly apartment within reasonable driving distance of the hospital AND the cost of the storage unit we're staying with my mother in law until either A) we can afford to rent something with a garage that Large Bastard can use as shop space and so that we can also dump the storage unit or B) my cousin buys a house or C) My mother in law dies, at which point the house we're living in becomes a fight between large bastard and his brother depending on who MiL has written out of the will this month.

So, realistically, everything in my life has been bugfuck insane since approximately August of 2018 and that (tentatively) seems to be slightly improving but we are unfortunately geographically locked into a location that we can't afford without the help of family unless Large Bastard is healthy and stable enough to get a job with a more predictable paycheck but that looks like it might be happening so we'll see?

but also oh my god i miss my vegas house and not living with my mother in law so much.

[jeannereames]

Hi, love your blog and your books, they have been good for my knowledge, they had made clear some points that were cover by the mist of ignorance, I mean, when I was at school my teachers didn't know about Alexander so when we saw him in history class there were a lot of incoherences (sorry for my poor grammar, I'm still learning english).

Hephaestion is an interesting character, we don't know much about him but I have always wonder how he was as a husband, in my research it seems that he wasn't so interest in women like others were. I have wonder if that make him a careless or a typical (in the context of the history) husband? Did he marry because Alexander say so or because he wants to ensure his place? Does he felt pity for the girl or he didn't care about her at all? Was a better husband than Alexander?

And talking about Drypetis, we know about the famous beauty of her mother and of Roxanne. But how do you think that beauty was? Certainly, not like my modern view about attractiveness of a female, so I wonder yours.

Sorry for the long post! 🙃

We know nothing about his interest (or lack of it) in women. He did marry in Susa in 324 because Alexander told him to…along with 90 other officers. That doesn’t mean he was against the idea—may have been one of the few fully in favor of it for the politics.

While fictionally I’ll make hay over his lack of recorded lovers (of either gender), from an academic point of view…it’s meaningless.

This is probably a good time to review “arguments from silence,” and why they’re so tricky.

An ARGUMENT FROM SILENCE suggests a lack of evidence is significant. BUT this only works if one can demonstrate that such evidence ought to be there…and isn’t.

That’s hard to do for the ancient world as “a lack of evidence” describes our cursed lot. My modern historian colleagues are regularly astonished by how little we have, and what we can spin out from that little.

I bring this up is because arguments from silence are too common in pop history, which too often does them badly due to a lack of understanding regarding 1) what evidence IS available, 2) what should be available, and 3) what’s absolutely unsurprising not to find.

Sometimes students will ask me, “But didn’t they write stuff like that down?” (‘That’ varying.) The answer is often, “No.” Or more colorfully, “They didn’t give a shit.” Even in the Roman Empire, they lacked bureaucratic record-keeping as we understand it. In Greece, centuries earlier, a few city-states kept some records, but most didn’t, especially prior to the mid-4thCentury BCE. It’s connected to the “epigraphic habit”: the desire to record information (in public) for posterity, and the idea that record-keeping might be a good general idea often merge.

Even so, WHAT they thought worthy of recording isn’t always what we’d like to know. This, in turn, pertains to how they wrote historical texts: what they chose to report (or not).

So, with that background…

The problem with knowing Hephaistion’s sexual interest (or lack of it) in women is how and why our sources relate such information.

In short: they mostly don’t.

This owes to their LASER focus on Alexander. Even then, what each source tells about him varies. I think we can probably be sure we know all Alexander’s wives, although Barsine’s status is not completely clear (imo). I assume she was at least a palakē, which is a formal mistress: less than a wife, but more than a hetaira. Yet given Macedonian marriage practices, perhaps she was a wife in Macedonian eyes? The Greeks regularly “demoted” Macedonian royal wives to mistresses, so I don’t trust our sources on this score.

Whatever the case, we don’t know all Alexander’s female (or male) sexual liaisons outside his wives because the sources mostly don’t care. When they do care (ala Plutarch and Curtius), it’s for some—often Romanized—moral point. Which is a looong-ass way from anything the Macedonians cared about.

And if we don’t even know his, how can we assume we know his officers’? Hell-to-the-no!

We hear about these women only if they matter to the larger (Alexander-driven) narrative. So we know the name of Philotas’s mistress, Antigonē, because she was hired by Krateros to bring pillow talk back to Alexander. We know Harpalus’s mistresses because he spent oodles of treasury funds on them, and got in trouble for it (twice). We recognize the name Laïs because she later became the long-time mistress (palakē) of Ptolemy I, mother of some of his important offspring in the Successor wars.

Ergo, not knowing the names of Hephaistion’s mistresses—or whether he had any—is not significant. Outside of special circumstance, we wouldn’t expect to.

We DO know the name of his wife from the mass-marriages at Susa in the spring of 324 because she was a princess, sister of Alexander’s wife, and her selection for him had distinct political significance. Yet that doesn’t mean he didn’t have a wife already, back in Macedon. Others of Alexander’s officers did–one reason many promptly divorced their Persian brides after Alexander’s death. I note the possibility largely as it illustrates the level of what we don’t know.

My educated hunch is that Hephaistion’s marriage to Drypetis was his first marriage. And I don’t believe he had any children (even by-blows), or we’d have heard about them as a result of Alexander’s extravagant grief. Yet this is far from saying he had no mistresses—or boyfriends, for that matter.

Regarding Drypetis and his relationship with her…it’s a complete blank. We just don’t know how Hephaistion treated her, what she thought of him, or what he thought of her. They weren’t married long enough. The weddings were in early spring, after ATG got back to Susa following the Gedrosian march/rest in Karmania. He spent a while sorting business in Susa before he went on to Opis (and subsequent unrest/mutiny there). I suspect Hephaistion and Drypetis were married no more than 6-7 months. He died in early/mid-October. She wasn’t pregnant by his death, but given how busy that period was, it could be a function of his duties and lack of time.

As for the beauty of Persian royal/elite women, it seems to have been something remarked upon by more than just Alexander historians. We lack images of Achaemenid Persians, alas, but below is a lapis lazuli bust of among the most famous: Atossa, daughter of Cyrus, wife of Darius, and mother of Xerxes (lived second half of the 6th century BCE). Note the large eyes, high eyebrows (apparently plucked), and small mouth. Given the tendency to idealizing in Ancient Near Eastern art, this suggests what would have been considered high beauty.

Beneath her is a Roman copy of Praxiteles’s original Aphrodite of Knidos—considered the ideal of Greek female beauty in the early-mid 4th century BCE (based on the incomparable Phryne, Praxiteles’s mistress).

Both have an oval face with full cheeks, and we can see Aphrodite’s nicely plump. That meant something! She had enough to eat = wealth. The modern starved-skinny model with long face, strong jaw, and stark cheekbones…that’s attractive now partly owing to what photographs well: prominent features and thinness (because the camera adds pounds). Persians and Greeks preferred rounder features, heart-shaped faces, small bow mouths, soft jaws, and fullness in the body (plump, not overweight). About the only hold-over would be large eyes.

What I haven’t really noted is coloring…other than a preference for pale skin as that signified one had slaves (= rich) and didn’t have to work in the fields outside. Hair color and eye color just wasn’t that big of a deal. Sometimes it comes to the fore: gray-eyed Athena. (Although the word is generic for blue/gray/greenish.) Similar for Apollo and Dionysos, in the Homeric hymns. Dionysos had black hair there (as did Apollo). Both “blond-up” only in the Classical era. And Hera was noted for her extraordinarily beautiful “cow-eyes.” E.g., large and dark-dark brown.

BUT, because I love to support the Gingers of the World…RED-blond hair was considered the most desired in Greece. Aphrodite was a strawberry blonde (at least sometimes), as was Helen…when anybody bothered to note it. And (quite probably) Alexander.

[pinkasrenzo]

Mid-year book freak out tag

Finally have some time to do this! Thanks @bloody-wonder for the tag💕

1. Best books you’ve read so far in 2022? The Raven Cycle books by Maggie Stiefvater, they just got me. I read them back-to-back in a week or so and they have everything I love in a book, the prose was great and totally fit the overall vibe with that kind of Night Vale-ish feel to it, sort of eerie but also cosy? Can totally see this series becoming a comfort read. All the characters have a special place in my heart and I wasn’t expecting to love all of them so much, I usually have one or two faves but I just, love all the gang and I love how they all love each other and their friendship and just. I love them. So much. Also well planned plot, mysteries where everything is connected and you can see the puzzle forming and everything clicking together, old European folklore (specifically old kings waiting to be woken)?? Sign me the fuck up. I need more. Also I had to get them in hardback and oh they're pretty.

Also, We Both Laughed in Pleasure the diaries of Lou Sullivan, it was incredibly good and moving and so happy? joyful? usually trans memoirs are always sad and bitter, especially when it's about someone living during the AIDS crisis, but this was just so full of joy, specifically joy in being trans and queer and even when it was sad there was always something comforting or hopeful. I'd recommend this to every trans man or transmasc out there (and anyone else really) cause there's so much anger and sadness out there that reading about how good it can be to just get to live your life is, something I've never seen in trans lit and it's just, it warms my heart reading about Lou's life.

2. Best sequels you’ve read so far in 2022? Leviathan Falls by James S.A. Corey probably. It started out different than the other books, had a broader focus and was a bit confusing at first as a choice but it worked out in the end and it helped in making sense of how it all came together so I appreciated it. Also seeing how the Roci crew story came to its end and how much they’ve all grown and changed since the beginning hit right in the feels. Lletting go of them made me emotional ngl and I’ll definitely re-read the whole series at some point but I couldn’t have asked for a better finale ( even with all the heartbreak and angst and tears it was just. Great.).

3. New releases you haven’t read yet, but want to? Book of Night by Holly Black, the plot is extremely intriguing and looks slightly darker? than her other books so I'm very curious how's it going to be. She's also one of my favorite authors and she's not disappointed yet so I'm trusting her to deliver some Quality.

4. Most anticipated release for second half of 2022? I know Greywaren is coming out in October so I'm waiting for it to get the whole trilogy and get more from TRC universe and I! Am! So! Hype! I don't even have a clue what it's about I just want more of anything TRC kjhgjhk

5. Biggest disappointment? Confessions of the Fox by Jordy Rosenberg probably. I was expecting heists and some good "be gay do crime" vibes given that it's based on an irl master thief and while it did deliver on the gay it didn't deliver on the crime at all. It was kinda boring? and unnecessarily long and drawn out in some parts, way too focused on the romance (and didn't even develop it properly?) and not enough on the plot, and given that it's a story-within-a-story kind of book with conspiracies and plotting and Big Mysteries tm... it was just Not It. It also kinda read more like an academic text rather than a fiction book, which I get the fictional author is an academic but there are better ways to go about it imo.

6. Biggest surprise? Lou Sullivan's diaries for all the best reasons. I said how joyful it is, but it's also not the usual narrative. His life was messy and his gender journey even more so and I don't think I've ever read something so relatable, like honestly ever. He didn't always know, he didn't write about dysphoria or being trapped in the wrong body or whatever, all his discoveries about himself are always marked by happiness and how right he feels, and how he just loves being a man, loving men and I don't think there's enough lit (gay and/or trans) that focuses on that, the happiness of being trans and gay. I started this book expecting it to be sad (cause, you know, AIDS) but I came out of it feeling happy and with all the negativity often going around trans spaces (specifically gay trans men spaces) it's,,, nice, really nice. I didn't know how much I needed this book until I read it, and I'm so incredibly happy I did.

7. Favorite new authors? I didn't read any book from a new author that made it into my faves yet? I really liked The Singing Hills Cycle by Nghi Vo but I wouldn't say it's fave material, just really good and definitely worth a read. We'll see if second half of 2022 will deliver more :')

8. Newest favorite character? Can I say the Gangsey? Definitely the gang from TRC, I love them all to bits they're my children I'm adopting all of them and Chainsaw and that's that nobody touches them I will protect them with my life.

9. Newest fictional crush? I do am very gay for Jacob Reckless (Reckless by Cornelia Funke) but that's nothing new, it's been going on for years I'm a lost cause at this point smh

10. Book that made you cry? We Are Okay by Nina LaCour made me tear up quite a bit, the way it deals with grief and the importance of solitude and growing up and figuring yourself out it's just *chef's kiss* and the way it's written it's like a warm hug from a friend in front of a fireplace and it's so comforting to read and while the title may seem misleading at first (they are Not Okay) by the end I was left with this cosy feeling that yeah maybe they will be okay after all, and even if life can be a mess sometimes it'll all work out in the end.

Also TRC (specifically the end) but that's just cause I was deep in the feels tm

11. Book that made you happy? Again, Lou Sullivan's diaries <3 queer joy is the best joy.

Also Fairy Oak - Il destino di una fata by Elisabetta Gnone came out this year and it's sort of an extra content collection for my favorite kids series and even if it's been 20? years since I read the series as a kid I still love coming back to the magic and the world in these books and getting to know these tiny little extra details about all the characters and the village I'll never grow tired of it.

12. Favorite book adaptation you saw this year? Haven't read the book but The Handmaiden was so unhinged and chaotic and Great and I loved it, can't believe it took me this long to watch it oh was it good. Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell was also great, both as an adaptation and as a mini-series, almost as chaotic and unhinged, definitely creepy and unsettling, also the fx were just *chef's kiss* so good. Great vibes all around no complaining here.

Also honourable mention to The Magicians for still making a mess of me on this rewatch.

13. Favorite review you’ve written this year? Bold of you to assume I write reviews.

14. Most beautiful cover? The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon has The Most Beautiful cover I've seen in a while, truly stunning, the colours the dragon, the style is just. Wow.

Also not as stunning but TRC has some truly gorgeous covers seeing them all lined up on the shelf is hhhhhh so. nice.

15. What books do you need to read by the end of the year? I still have A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara in my TBR and I plan on reading this summer but am waiting for my beloved kobo to come back from maintenance. I'm also curious about The Secret History by Donna Tartt after seeing so much of it on my dash, and I wanted to read more quality dark academia so ig it's the perfect book to start with jhjkj. I'm also planning on finally reading Coraline by Neil Gaiman and then I have Le Otto Montagne by Paolo Cognetti which I know absolutely nothing about cause it was a surprise gift from a friend but they promised gay and wilderness and mountains and the cover looks so pretty and winter-y so I'm def hype to read.

I'm tagging @pollyna @bismuth-209 @abramminyard @maybemountains @theblackswanuniverse if you want to do it ^^

[yamithediaperdork]

Welcome to baby land (Ben 10)

it was a tale as old as time, one that had happened before, would happen this day and despite the fall out from today's events would happen again in the future.

A young boy, fueled by fetish desires and spending hour after hour, day after day bringing himself to the peak as he looked at his chosen fetish, only to pull back last second.

Because the boy knows for what he wants, for what he's going to do.. he needs that desperate pent up denial of release to shut down his common sense. to make him nice and dumb.

His name was Ben Tennyson, and up until a short while ago he had been the hero of the universe and earth. But that was before the watch had been taken, and given to his cousin Gwen who had been picked as being a most reasonable hero. with cutting remarks that he would of never gotten the watch for as long as he had had it's marker realized who was wearing it, and being called to immature.. was it any wonder a bitter and dejected Ben cut himself off from his extended family and drove into the world of porn?

never mind he had beaten off a alien invasion, a 'pants peeing doofus' couldn't be trusted with the watch.

Fine. whatever. if they wanted to look at him as a stupid big baby.. that's what he'd become.

He didn't even like diapers at first when he started, but well.. porn has a way of warping a young boy's mind. Looking at picture after picture, caption after caption and reading the stories Ben for all intents and purposes turned himself in a diaper boy, and a humiliation junkie.

Taking birthday money he even found and brought a package of punishment diapers meant for shaming (though he got it at a discount as the shop was being put out of business) that were super thick, boasted how they could hold any mess.. and also claimed they didn't keep any stink from being contained and guaranteed diaper rash if used.

For a porn addicted loser like Ben, this was pure gold and since he paid for rush devilry he got a enema bag and a small bottle of little crampers, the enema for brats.

Ben knew what he wanted, total, public humiliation but he kept ruining it for himself with self pleasure driving the need out of his mind before he could do it.

finally, Mid October the little porn fueled loser decided enough was enough, he was gonna stop wasting his time and the diapers he'd paid for and set himself up to goon. For a week strait he subjected himself to it, and by the time he was done on Sunday night, Monday morning the little loser set himself up to fail.

waking up early, Ben used the whole bottle of little crampers even though it said to just mix 1/8 with a litlre bag for a enema kit, and groaned and whimpered as he used it, hot water and a dash of castor oil in the big enema bag, only his bulky white and black t-shirt hid the preggo belly he gave himself.

getting back to his bedroom and cramping, the soon to be ruined diaper loser looked at the pack of his punishment diapers and having not worn one till today, toyed with layering at first but they just looked too thick.

Settling on one of the bulky diapers with it sobbing crybaby design, he taped it on then tried the tapes, blushing as the package lived up to it's name.

Once taped on it would take 2 hours for the tapes to come back off, he was truly trapped. again a normal boy of Ben's age would of been panicking, realizing they had gone too fair but Ben just breathed fast, and smiled as he picked his baggiest pair of pants and was delighted that they still only JUST hid the diaper, if he bent over his padded shame would be CLEAR.

Getting down stairs and getting breakfast in himself, he was already seated as his parents came down and made small talk with them even as the delightful cramps started to build. (he'd never admit it, well at least before today's events unfolded but he'd grown to like pain, it made his heart beat fast and smile)

Still he couldn't help but squirm and groan a little bit, and got looks of concern from his parents as he finished his bowl of cereal.

"Benny you feeling alright?" His mother asked, coming over and putting a hand to his forehead. "You can stay home today if your not feeling good."

"N-No I'll be alright. just worried about a math test." Ben said, mixing truth with lies,then added: "Besides, you and dad said you were BOTH gonna be out all day today. who'd stay with me?"

"Heh, He's got a point there.. and good on you Ben. I'm proud your being mature enough not to try and get out of a test." His dad said, totally misunderstanding the happy giggle Ben let out.

His father might of thought it was Ben was so happy he was proud of him, But for diaper bitch Benny, the irony of the comment almost made him ruin the fun early.

If Ben's plan had one flaw (well one he'd admit to) it was the fact that he hadn't taken into account how much slower he'd be having to waddle his massive diaper butt to school with the added fun of having to stop 3 times to force himself not to spoil the fun early.

He'd even left a little sooner then normal, his parents had been quick with their breakfast and he 'accidentally' left his house key on the desk in his room and after making sure the front door was locked, went out the back door as you could lock it from the inside while the door was open.

'No getting out of this by running home!' Ben gleefully thought.

He barley made it into homeroom before the bell rang, though since he was known to be tardy from time to time it didn't raise too much attention, get getting a snide comment from his homeroom teacher about gracing them with his presence.

Even better, home was also his math class and that was going to be first period (which was a good thing for the ever so full little perv as his 'chocolate mud baby' wasn't going to stay in him much longer.)

Mr. Fillawick wasted little time in handing out the tests and after a standard warning that he'd tolerate NO cheating and there was going to be NO bathroom breaks, he offered anyone who had to go a chance to use the potty now.

'OK..this is it..your last chance.. you could just say you need to go, and sneak out the school.fill your diapers in the woods and get out of them once the tapes give up.' Ben thought to himself, biting his lip.

it wouldn't be destroying himself in class and getting him labeled stinky baby for the rest of the year, but it would land him in hot water with the school and his parents and he'd run the risk of being seen outside right?

He almost started to raise his hand when his inner pervert took over and he just turned it into brushing his hand though his hair.

"Alright, don't say I didn't warn you. you'll have a hour to do the test. good luck." Mr. Fillawick said and shrugged, going back to his desk and sitting down, doing whatever it was teachers did.

Five minutes later and Ben was in a mixture of heaven and hell. he was twitching and sweating a little bit, his pencil twitching in his hand even as he started to leak in little bursts against the front of his diapie.

the cramps were at the point of no return and even if Ben said fuck it and got up to run, he wouldn't of made it more then five steps.

all he'd managed to do so far was write his name on the test and the date, then the cramps had gone over board.

'Ok..Ok.. this was a mistake.. I've leaked enough boy milk to see that.. maybe.. maybe I can still just.. get out..of..' Ben thought, going white knuckled as he gripped the side of his desk with his left hand as a powerful cramp hit, a low rumbling fart coming out his backside though the sound was mostly muted.

the smell however was not as the diapers lived up to their claims and Kids around Ben wrinkled their noses and looked around looking for the source of the smell and eyes zeroing in on his as he was blushing.

"Mr. Fillawick? I think Ben needs to go to the bathroom." A redhead boy behind him said. "Or at Least can he be moved to the back of the classroom.

"Mr. Tennyson had his chance for that Mr. Randal. and I prefer he stay where I can keep a eye on him." Came the teachers amused answer.

even as the class giggled and laughed, two more rotten poots escaped and there was open cries of disgust.

"Gah, at least open a window!"

"What did you have to eat this morning, a skunk!?"

Ben whimpered and squirmed, he had the whole class basically looking at him now and the teasing and taunts had brought his pervert side back up to full power.

'It's now or never.' Ben thought, though he also knew wasn't really a option. it was more like Now or never if he wanted a semblance of control over the act.

it helped he was trembling lots now but Mr. Fillawick who'd never cared for Ben much since he was a rowdy student only watched with sadistic glee.

Ben's Pencil 'accidentally' shook out of his hand and rolled off the desk and onto the floor, and Ben made a show of just reaching into his desk to find anther one.

"Mr. Tennyson, whatever your habits in your own room may be, I run a clean Classroom." the smirking teacher said. "Bend down and point up that pencil."

"Uh..but..If I-" Ben started, putting the perfect crybaby whine in his voice.

"You'll what? fart? like you haven't been doing that already?" the teacher shot back.

Putting on a show of being embarrassed and scared (he was embarrassed but his heart was beating fast) Ben leaned over the right side of his desk and there was a gasp from the students behind him as one thing he hadn't planned on happened.

"BEN'S WEARING A DIAPER!" Hooted Crash.

"A BABY DIAPER!" a blond girl added.

"More like a BIG baby diaper!" Randal noted with amusement.

Somehow his pants must of lowered enough to flash off his embarrassing diaper! Oh god! for all of 2.4 seconds trued to stop what was about to happen but the act of leaning over had been the final trigger.

as the enema finally worked it's magic and the back of his diaper started to swell up Ben could only hear the roar of his mess and though tear filled eyes almost could swear he could see image of him in just diapers and a bib, tapping a shovel on a grave that had been filled in. the tombstone read:

RIP Ben's self respect.

as the force of the mess made Ben fall forward, landing face down and ass up, his pants failing down more so everyone could watch his diapers load up in the back (thankfully they wouldn't be able to tell what he was doing in the front!) The image of baby Ben came over and looked down with a grin at the real one.

"Welcome to baby land~ no going back now."

As Ben's life was ruined, and he was designed to never be able to get that 'excited' again unless he was crapping brains out(heck, he was going to be pulled from school and his parents would begin his new big baby life, treating him like the baby they thought he wanted to be, not knowing he was just a humiliation junkie) Charmcaster smirked in her jail cell.

Sure having to watch all the events unfold from sitting into of a toilet wasn't the way she'd hope to see the spell play out, not to mention it had been that bitch Gwen she had targeting, but this worked out in the end.

Gwen would suffer being the cousin of the big stinky baby and would likely end up having to change him and it wouldn't be too long now before her uncle broke her out. wincing as Ben started to baby babble though she did have one moment's regret.

'I mean, I'm evil and wanna take over the world but was making him a diaper perv too far?' She wondered, then smiled. 'Naaaah!'

The end

[tinywitchgoblin]

Hi, I was curious if you could ship me with one of the bad batchers? If you don’t want to, that’s okay :)) So I’m five foot tall, I weigh 110, I’m 18 years old, INFJ, October libra. I have light skin, brown eyes, long eyelashes, and thick mid length dark brown hair. I like to draw, write, read, be with friends and family in my free time, or just to be by myself sometimes. I love and thrive on coffee, as well as tea and music. Also Im obsessed with mushrooms, I currently have a fairy garden aesthetic. I like taking care of my plants and spending time in my room, or decorating it lol. Though when Im busy, I’m working at my job and doing school. I’d say Im pretty responsible for my age- I buy my own things, I hate relying on others for money, I like buying people stuff because I like giving. I make sure I get my work done asap with good amount of effort, I hate being lazy when I can be a goofball. Besides that, I’m a goofball. I try my best to make other people smile and laugh cuz it makes my day, and I try to be helpful to others when they’re stressed. Whenever my friends are upset, I will try to talk them through with whatever is going on, and do my best to ease their mind. I like to challenge those in authority, especially ones I don’t like. For instance, my assistant principal wrongfully took my phone away. I was using it for school, and he knew that. I glared at him for the entire day whenever I saw him. I wanted him to know that I didn’t like him, or respect them. And I’ll do that to anyone I don’t like. I try to act tough, but sometimes I really push myself too much. I have a lot of anxiety that I’m not doing enough, that whenever I’m taking a break, I convince myself Im lazy. I always feel like a nuance to my friends even though they’ve told me constantly I’m not. I’ve also dealt with the lost of my closest cousin, which was very hard on me, but I try to keep going for her. But generally, I’m a happy person, and I just try to get through the day. I’m working on loving myself more, and I’m slowly getting better at it.

Hello lovely! I ship you with...

Hunter!

I would have to say that the two of you first really connected after a mission and he needed to get away from all the action for a little bit, so he stayed the night at your place. You showed him your mushrooms, which he really enjoyed learning about! He asked you to tell him all about them; he really just wanted to hear more of your voice. To him, it was like running water, or a cool breeze. Listening to you talk helped calm him down, relax, and let his guard down. We all know Hunter is a pretty serious dude overall, right? I think that when he got to spend time with you, he would see your goofy nature and eventually let himself act silly as well. With you, he doesn't need to be a sergeant in the grand army of the republic, not a genetically enhanced soldier bred for batter; with you, he could figure out what it really meant to be "Hunter." He didn't necessarily have time to figure himself out before, but he does with you, and he loves you for it. Being a member of the bad batch, he also has a lot of respect for how you deal with authority you don't like. You're not like Wrecker, charging headfirst into the situation without a plan, but you still make your true feelings known. Overall, there's just a lot of mutual respect between you, and you both end up growing throughout the process.