#i simply changed and your brain cant seem to comprehend that not everyone wants to stay the same

[butchdykenormallen]

"do you want to live a life with extra bullshit? or do you wanna live your best life?"

ya see. this is contradictory. my best life is while being trans, being referred to as a male name, using my own pronouns, being happy. the extra bullshit is stuff i can leave behind. im doing this for ME. and only MEEE. i dont want to think about the rest of it when i can go to the supermarket and get called "sir" and "him" and "they" with the people i trust. i have experiences outside of you that i dont talk about because i dont have to. i love being me, and once im out of here, ill be who i wanna be without you.

[whitexwingedxdoves]

Scream            part 3

Part Three: Host Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Platonic Peter Parker x Reader Pronouns: She/Her Warning: Swearing, fighting. Summary: With the fear that Scream is still inside you, you confine in Bucky. A/N: Im so glad people are enjoying this as much as I am. Let me know if you would like to be tagged when Part 4 is out.  Master list of chapters

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You tried to brush it off climbed into the bed and under the sheets, attempting to get lost in the feeling of the silk on your skin and just when you thought you were drifting off. You cant get rid of me that easy.

The next morning you found yourself in the kitchen sat at a rather large table, poking at the bowl of chopped fruit in front of you. You thoughts were else where and despite the growl of your stomach you couldn’t stop thinking about her voice. All night you felt like you were talking to yourself trying to get her to speak again, so you knew you weren’t going crazy but she never responded. You couldn’t shake the fear that she might still be inside you some how. Laying down your spoon you ran your fingers through your hair attempting to come back to reality. That’s when Peter walked into the room, you sent him a small warm smile and sat back in your chair watching him for a moment. He sent you a smile back but he seemed a little scared of you, his reaction caused you to sigh and look away from the boy. That look alone made you feel like a monster.

“I never got the chance to say thank you for saving my life” attempting to break the tension, the froze for a moment holding an apple in his hand. He just nodded, thinking about his next move. He eventually decided to sit beside you at the table, nervously playing with the fruit he held. “What’s on your mind kid?” you questioned, carefully watching his actions. “She... Scream – she said that we were the same...” his words barely surpassing a whisper, he hung his head down a little trying to make sense of the words. “I mean, she could shoot webs...” he added clearly lost in thought. “Don’t let her do that to you, don’t let her get in your head, Peter.” Resting your hand on his arm to reassure him, you gave him another warm smile. “Trust me, you’re nothing like her. Regardless of what she can and cant do.” He responded with a nod, his smile seemed genuine but not convinced. Pulling your hand away from him to pick up your fork again, you started stabbing at the fruits in the bowl. You heard Peter push away from the table and walk towards the door. You assume he had left but you could sense someone. You looked up at the doorway for a moment at first no one appeared, so you shoved the fork full of fruits finally into your mouth keeping your eyes on the doorway. It wasn’t long until Bucky strolled into the kitchen.

He didn’t say anything at first, he just made his way to the cabinet and pulled out a glass before turning to the skin to get a glass of water. You swallowed your mouthful, your hand covering your mouth attempting to be lady like. Once he had finished gulping down the water, he nodded your way “Hey” he spoke simply yet it still managed to send butterflies into your stomach. “Hey” you smiled back at the man, your eyes wandered away like you were thinking of something. Bucky noticed your expression to soften almost instantly, which only caused his brow to cock. “What’s up” he asked leaning against the counter and crossing his arms. You just looked up at him and scrunched your face a little, deciding if he was trust worthy enough to tell about last nights episode. “Erm – Last night when I was falling asleep” You started, taking a few moments you chewed on your thumb before you continued. “I could have sworn she spoke to me again” you admitted, fear striking your face as the words left you mouth. He just shook his head before making his way over to you, taking the spot that Peter previously sat in. “No, no! You just had a long day. Pretty traumatic day actually. I’m sure it was just your mind playing tricks on you” As he attempted to reassure you, you mimicked Peter’s unsure nod as you looked up into his eyes. “Hey, I have nothing planned for today. I’ll stay close by, just incase” he added, giving you his best reassuring smile. “Thank you” you whispered back at him, almost feeling guilty for making him babysit you for the day but the guilt wasn’t anywhere as heavy as the fear.

-

As the sun started to disappear behind the hills, you found yourself in the communal area, tucked into a blanket reading one of your favourite books that you managed to find in the 1000’s of bookshelves jotted around the place. You snuggled into the corner of the sofa, engrossed in the words on the pages. Bucky had kept to his promise, he barley left your side all day, in fact the only time you were ever alone was when you went to the bathroom. He sat close by to you but not too close, he thought you looked far too comfy and didn’t want to ruin it. Peering down at the pages you were reading, keen to know what had you so engrossed. You looked up at him, though now his eyes were glued to the page, it made you laugh slightly which broke his attention. “You like Fight Club?” you asked, a smirk still plastered across your lips. “Never heard of it.” The words made your jaw drop, How had he never heard of Fight Club, hell everyone had seen the movie right? “What?” he added, noting your expression. “How... It’s Fight Club, I get not reading the book but the movie?” he just shook his head at your words as he laid back into the sofa a little more, his arms resting on the head rest. “You mean to tell me you’ve never had to question your sexuality watching Brad Pitt wear crop tops?” He just laughed in your direction, the comment clearly tickled him a little more than he had planned. “Oh we are so watching Fight Club, what the hell!” clearly excited by the idea, you shut your book and placed it down next to you.

As you and Bucky shared a laugh at your over enthusiasm over Brad Pitt’s navel, the voice came back. Oh how cute, like young love. Instantly you stopped laughing replacing your smile with confusion. Oh just stop teasing yourself, just kiss him already. The voice laughed. Bucky picked up on the quick mood change and sat up in his chair, his hands reaching to hold your arm to calm you but you turned your head towards the doorway suspecting someone was coming and like clock work, Steve turned the corner. It was starting to creep you out now but you chose not to mention it. He looked like he had some news to share which meant the voice in your head would have to wait. “I hope I’m not interrupting something” Steve teased, cocking his eyebrow up at Bucky who responded with a sarcastic smile before his eyes wandered back to you, scanning you to make sure you was okay. “So just as we were about to leave, for Carlton Drake. The news informed us that one of his rockets blew up as it was taking off – When we looked deeper at the footage... It looked like he was on there” he paused, insinuating that he had met his end... but in a freak accident, it didn’t seem likely. “We did more digging, turns out Scream wasn’t the only Klyntar he was holding onto. We don’t know how many but...” Venom. You looked around confused for a moment, you could feel rage bubble up inside you but it wasn’t yours. The pain and confusion seemed far too much for you as your eyes welled up slightly. Every other time she made an appearance you could feel how infectious her confidence was but not this time, this time she felt completely different... she felt scared.

You looked up at Steve as he seemed to still be talking “Venom” you’re words interrupting his. The men looked at you confused for a moment before you looked back at Bucky. “She’s still there.” You whispered, despite knowing full well Steve could hear you. “I don’t know what it means but, she seems scared... maybe that’s one of them.” You shook your head slightly, attempting to help the situation as much as you could. “Captain, James... Mr Stark needs your assistance in the lobby, he says its of the urgent kind” FRIDAY broke up the awkward silence in the room and just like that all three of you made your way towards the lobby as fast as your legs could possibly take you.

-

As you bust through the door to the lobby with the two super soldiers you saw Nat, Tony, Sam and Wanda all facing a rather large being. He looked exactly like Scream only he was practically monochrome. You froze in fear as the other two raced in front of you, you wanted to move but you just couldn’t. No! She screamed, causing you to grip each side of your head and wince in pain. “He’s after Scream” Tony shouted towards the men, attempting to fill them in as quickly as possible before things turned sour. “He doesn’t believe that we got rid of her”

The large figure laughed at the billionaires words. “You think it’s that easy?” He mocked, slowly inching closer. “You think your tiny human brains can comprehend the science behind extracting a Klyntar from their host?” He pushed past Tony with ease as he made his way over to you. Your body felt like ice, your eyes welling up. Suddenly your back bent as you screamed out in pain, to everyone else you looked almost possessed. Your body slowly shifting, revealing the very thing that he had come for. Scream panted for a while but every breath sounded like a growl. “There she is” he laughed his rather large hands wrapping around her wrist. “No!” she screamed using all the energy she had to pull away from him. “You left me” her voice though already distorted started to crack. “You left me, alone. YOU LEFT ME WITH HIM” she screamed in his face, his only reaction was to laugh. “You’ve always been one for the dramatics haven’t you” he mocked pulling on her wrist. She fought as hard as she could but she was weak, she had yet to master her full hold on you but you had a feeling her weakness wasn’t the lack of bonding, no it was him. It was Venom. You need to stop him. You cried out to her, attempting to relate to her in some way.

That’s when she whipped her hair into action, wrapping around his neck she kept squeezing but it wasn’t enough, a talon formed from his body and struck her across the face. The avengers stood and watched, not know exactly who to help in this situation or if to help at all but Bucky grew more and more worried as he watched that large dark figure overpower Scream. “We have to help her” He whispered to Steve, Steve peered over his shoulder at his friend with a look of regret. “It’s not our fight, Buck” he replied simply but Bucky didn’t take no for an answer. “How is it not our fight, Y/N is there... not just Scream. If Scream dies who’s to say she doesn’t die too!” his words were fumbling over each other but Steve nodded, finally defeated with the truth of the situation.

Though it wasn’t your physical being that was beaten, you felt every punch. You could feel her getting weaker and weaker but she still stood her ground, fighting back with everything she could... well until she couldn’t. As Venom’s fist came hammering down towards her face, she allowed herself to take the back seat, giving you the control again but before you couldn’t even understand what was happening, your face met with black, completely knocking you unconscious.

When you finally woke up, you found yourself in what you could only presume was a cell. Though it wasn’t bars and a metal bed, no. It looked comfortable and the walls almost seemed invisible if it wasn’t for the blue hue. What the hell happened.