#i should sleep cus i don't remember words or how to use them

[a-sleepy-ginger]

26/5/24

✿❈✿❈✿

Managed to remember an essay

Toast

Started watching witch from mercury

[ghoulelegy]

When You Trans Your Gender (Transmasc. Version)

Ficlet I wrote at like 3am cus I couldn't sleep lesssss goooooo

Summary: Terzo and Cardinal Copia help you take your first shot of hormone replacement therapy.

Pairing: Terzo & Cardinal Copia / Transmasc. Reader

Words: 700ish?

Content warning: Needles/Injections

Contains:

Fluff Safe For Work Platonic First Dose of HRT

Read Trans Your Gender (Transmasc. Version) on AO3

Or the Transfem. Version here.

When you came out to the ministry as transgender, their support was unwavering. After updating your name and pronouns to your preference, they promptly arranged a referral to the gender clinic, and after some time, you received a prescription to begin hormone replacement therapy.

And luckily, you had Terzo and Copia to show you the ropes.

Copia knocked softly on your ajar bedroom door, holding up a box containing the precious vial of estrogen. Your eyes lit up, and you couldn't help but chuckle when you noticed Buttercup, one of his rattinos, perched on his shoulder.

“I picked up your prescription, topolina,” he spoke softly, his voice filled with warmth. "You can come take it, si, si, we can help you inject it. My brother and I have experience. And Buttercup is here for the…emotional support"

Gratitude filled your voice as you replied, "Thanks, Copia. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Well, good thing I'm here then. Come, come, come, I'll take you to the infirmary."

You followed him into the room, where Terzo was waiting, a bright smile underneath his papal paint. He reached out and gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "We're in this together. Now, I'll help you with your first injection, and we'll make sure you're comfortable with everything. Okay?"

You nodded. "Mhm."

"How about I give it to you since it's your first time?" Terzo suggested.

"Sure. That'll be great actually." 

"Okay, bella, turn around," Terzo softly instructed. As you turned, he prepared the injection with utmost care and expertise. The room held an unusual intimacy, with Terzo's gentle touch and Copia's unwavering presence (he kept shuffling out a thumbs-up whenever you looked at him.) Your heart raced with a blend of excitement and nervousness. The vial of estrogen symbolized the promise of your journey ahead, and you knew you were in capable hands.

Terzo's voice remained soothing as he talked you through the process. "Just relax, principessa. This will be a small step on your path to becoming your true self." He carefully administered the injection, and you were pleasantly surprised when you barely felt a thing. The sensation of the needle was fleeting, but it triggered a memory of the day you first confided in Terzo and Copia about your true self. Their unwavering support, like an unspoken promise, had carried you through countless moments of doubt.

Your heart raced. This first injection symbolized not just a step in your transition but a testament to the strength of your strength with Terzo and Copia. It was a reminder that, despite the challenges ahead, you had them. 

You made it.

"All done now. Terzo's smile beamed as he ruffled your hair. "That was perfect."

Copia pulled you into a hug, his voice choked with pride. "You did great, topolina. "We're here for you every step of the way."

"I'll give you this," Terzo said, handing you the now-empty vial with a warm smile. You took the vial, touched by his gesture. "Thanks, Terzo." A reminder of your first shot , you thought, holding the vial close.

He leaned in a little closer, his voice gentle. "And remember, if you ever need help with future shots, just come find me, okay?"

"I will," you said with a smile.

"Also, y-you might feel a bit of a burning or uncomfortable sensation later on…yes?" Copia continued. "It should die down by itself, but if there's any problem, let one of us know, carina."

"Yes, absolutely. Do let us know," Terzo added. "Your health is important to us"

"Alrighty," you chuckled.

"Remember, we're proud of you, always" Copia softly embraces you once more, before being joined by Terzo. "And look, Buttercup is proud of you too" he holds her out in the air. You let her sniff you, before you gently scritch her face. "Mr Squeakers is sleepy I presume."

"Yep - Oh speaking of - I recently found out that Mr. Squeakers is a girl, actually. I'll love her no matter what, and in the same way we'll love you no matter what"

"Ah. Fuck you, you're going to make me sappy" you chuckle. 

-Fin-

[slasherrabbitmadness]

Victorian DILF Brahms x Female Reader

Series: Don't forget who you belong to.

Chapter 2 - Give me your answer, do

Underthecut - NSFW, Male Masturbation, Oral - Male Receiving.

Brahms sat idly in his living room, leaning back in his large leather recliner. Feet shuffling along the Egyptian carpet, thumbs twiddling as he hums Daisy Bell by Harry Dacre,

"I'm half crazy, all for the love of you." He smiles as he thinks of her. How her hair shines in the sun, like a halo above her head. Her eyes sparkling whenever she laughs, how the corner of her eyes crinkles ever so slightly. How her smile makes his heart skip a beat.

Brahms sucks in a breath, his hum-singing continues, "There are bright lights the dazzling eyes of beautiful Daisy Bell." He sits up straight, eyes on the unlit fireplace, the gold gate held an ornate Chinese dog welded on the front. He looks above the fireplace to the mantel, the rows of photos in their ash wood frames.

His face is stern as he glances at a particular photo. He, a half-smile as his hand rests on his son's shoulder. Lawrence when he was a boy of eight. Lawrence's other shoulder had a delicate white hand upon it. Gerti, her lips dark with her favourite shade of lipstick, her slight freckles littered her face, her silky blonde hair up in a beautiful age-appropriate bun.

His hum-singing fades as he continues to stare, the family photo, the family in the photo appearing as sharp and elegant as their social standing. That day, Gerti had scolded him all morning, her eyes wide and glossy, her alabaster skin held a blue and yellow hue under her eyes. Her fingers were cold and clammy.

"For the love of everything, Brahms, hurry for once." Brahms flinches as he can still hear her screeching, "Lawrence, get the cat's paw out of your mouth and stop pulling its tail!" He chuckles,

"I miss that cat," Brahms laughs to himself. Never one for pets but how that scraggly little beast could make his son laugh in the most jovial way, warmed him greatly.

His amused grin falls as his eyes lock with Gerti's. Grabbing the photo, his thumb ghosts over her image, remembering how once soft her skin was. His stomach churns as a chill seeps into his bones, shaking him in his spot.

He places the family photo back on the mantle, right next to a photo of her. Her hands grasping each other, face tilted slightly, a timid smile upon her face. "Sir, I don't need my photo taken!"

"Y/n, as my employee of a year, you are practically family." Brahms let out a shaky breath as his mind replays the conversation. "And you may call me, Brahms. You address Gerti by her full name."

"Gerti and are intimate in ways that have allowed us to be close."

"Pray tell may I watch these intimate moments?" His cheeky reply had cost him an ear full from his wife when she had found out. Brahms still never understood why women used such charged words to describe a close friendship.

Brahms left the living room, a stirring in his gut had him heave. He wanted to call upon her for aid, 'Fetch me a water with some ice, and actually bring some black tea and one of our lemons from Italy.' he clears his throat at the thought of dryness being washed back by the cold refreshment.

He had given her a few hours a week for personal time. Free to be spent however she pleased. Ever since the death of his wife and Lawerence attending Rugby School for Boys she had more free time. Much to Brahms immense displeasure.

Brahms had taken to stalking her on her days off. Wanted to see what she got up to. Where she went and specifically with who. He would linger twenty feet behind, always darting behind stalls and other tall men to hide, he even took to wearing a coat that he kept hidden in hopes she would not recognize him further.

He stared in amazement at how well she helped an old lady onto the trolley all the while juggling her belongings, refusing a 'tip' "It's the nice thing to do." in reference to helping others.

His cheeks flushed whenever she stopped to smell the flowers, literally. A quaint smile as she turned down the offer for a free one from the vendor. She often stopped to sniff the white and yellow flowers. He had noticed Daisys were her favorite.

He seethed when one day you were stopped by a handsome Youngman, his tall lean frame stood confidently as his dark brown eyes held a softness as they looked down at you. He had overheard the name in a distinctly American accent, "Dan, yeah I'm studying medicine with my colleague, I'd introduce you but..." He hated that you always walked near the campus, hated all the young men eager, too eager to chat up a single young lady.

Dan had never gotten farther than chaste conversations and one quick feather-light kiss on her cheek.

Brahms wondered if he should up and move, just to be a little further away from the university, away from the young men, away from one of them stealing her away. She was his, he had just yet to convince her. Ask her, even bring it up in any conceivable way.

One occasion made the blood sear in his veins. He should have been more away, should have been more vigilant of this Dan fellow. He watched from a distance as Dan rounded the corner and collided with her. His tall body fell over hers, his hand had just managed to catch the back of her head, softening to the blow to the ground.

"Oh, God! I am so sorry!" Dan's eyes wide in shock, "Oh, I'm so sorry."

She laughed, "No, no, it's fine," Brahms gritted his teeth.

"No, it's not." Dan pulled himself and her up, his hand holding her in a firm grasp. "I am so sorry." He scratched the back of his head, his expression doleful.

"Accidents happen." She assured, grabbing his hand still wrapped around hers. " It's okay Dan."

"You remember me!" Dan's brown eyes lit up. A Radiant smile over his face as he stepped closer to her.

Brahms seethed as the scene played out before him. She smiled, he smiled. She laughed, he laughed. The words between the two began to fall effortlessly between them both.

He watched despondently. How she could let herself relax so easily in another man's presence. How her demeanor shifted around Dan. Those stiff shoulders eased themselves as Dan placed his hand on her shoulder and winked.

Brahms cursed, the university's chapel bell rang out. Every thunderous clang shot through Brahms. Every clang was a reminder he had another place to be. The dreaded desk in the dreaded little corner of his office.

He turned one last time, eyes watched as she smiled with a warmth he'd never seen, how she leaned into Dan as his smile shined bright.

Brahms walks up to his maid's room, thanking Gerti for installing a sense of comfort in Y/N as to never locking the door.

He jiggles the door handle, "Hm..." Again, "Weird," his eyes narrow, "Bloody thing is locked." He jostles the handle, "Bloody woman..."

Click

"Ah, there we are." He hums in approval as the door creaks open. Forever grateful for the previous owner teaching him how to easily unlock a door in the house without a key "Rickety ol' tings" Brahms mocked the man's heavy accent.

He inhales as he enters her room. The simple little abode warmed his heart. Her bed and the nightgown left upon it stirred his loins. He walks to the bed, grabs the nightgown, bringing it to his nose, he growls as he inhales, her natural scent lingered on the garment.

Brahms holds the garment in his teeth as he shucks off his pants, freeing his painfully erect cock. The thoughts whirl in his mind as he plops onto her bed, sighing with content as he sinks down into the mattress and a sneer as he grips his cock.

The same bed she slept, where when the night calls for it, he knew she'd sleep naked. "Fuck..." He growls through the nightgown, ripping it from his mouth to place it over his chest. Her bed, her bed where she no doubt has touched herself, even if briefly in a beautiful sinful manner.

Does she shy away as she dipped those delicate little fingers into her dripping pussy? Does she bite her cheek to stifle her pitchy moans when that jolt of pleasure shot through her?

Brahms collects some spit in his large hand, sucking in a breath as his cold spit touches his cock. His hand pumps eagerly around his thick member, a low groan as the image of her crawling up to him floods his mind. He sighs as he pictures it as her hand gripping him, gasping at how large it is,

"Brahms, my fingers can't even wrap around it!"

"That's okay, love, use those pretty little lips and that wet little tongue to help you."

"What if my make-up smears?"

"Oh, love, that's what I want." Brahms throws his head back, thumb circling his swollen head, picturing it as her delicate wet little tongue. He grips himself harder as he swears he can feel her lips wrap around his cock.

His low groans and breathy moans fill her little room, her name falling from his lips, "So beautiful, Y/N. My love, so perfect, mhm, yes, further down your throat, moaning around it."

Brahms breathing hitches as he pictures her, clawing at his chest as tears prick the corner of her eyes, "I'm a little nervous," She says as she rubs her glistening pussy, inches over his leaking cock.

"You got this, my love." Brahms keens,

"Will it fit, Brahms?..." She bites her lip, a hand groping her beautiful chest.

"My love, just relax, I have you." He pictures gripping her hip to ease her down onto him, gripping his cock as he imagines her warm pussy gripping him.

Audible slaps from the fisting of his cock, mixing with his now desperate pleas and moans fill her room. She's on top of him, her chest flushed against his, she's commenting on how she loves the feel of his hairy chest, praised-filled moans as she comments on his pecs flexing under her.

Brahms bucks his hips into his hand, "Hold you close." He moans as he pictures rolling on top of her, her legs wrapping around his lower half, arms pulling him in close, whispering in his ear,

"Brahms cum in me, cum in me, make me yours." He grips squeeze around his cock, imaging it's her pussy clenching around him, "I love you, Brahms."

He hisses as his body shakes, muscles flexing, toes curling as he snarls out his release. The image of her accepting his seed sends heat washing over him. His cock pulses in his grip, his cum spraying over her nightgown, the remaining spilling down his fingers and cock.

His temples pulse, his ears ringing. His toes unfurling as his legs ceased in their shakes. He squeezes his cock a few more times, hearing her breathlessly thanking him, "It's so warm in me. Thank you, Brahms." He swears he can feel her nuzzling into his chest as if she was there.

Brahms coughs as he sits up, shaking his head as he gingerly throws his legs over the side, placing his feet on the door. The nightgown falls over his cock. He snorts, using it to clean himself. He stands up, placing the nightgown where he had found it. A wicked and mischievous grin spreads over his face at the thought of her wearing his spent at night.

He grunts as he retrieves his trousers, pulling them up in haste, tucking his chub back in. A content sigh as he eyes the bed and nightgown. She wouldn't be sleeping alone for much longer.

Brahms snaps his attention to the trill of his front doorbell. He clicks his tongue as he makes haste to the door. He debates on if he has time to properly clean his hand, decides to just wear a fancy white-glove he leaves, conveniently, near the front door instead.

"Coming! My Maid is out currently," He sucks in a breath as he pulls a glove over his right hand, he cocks his head quickly before opening the door. "Sorry, it'd have been answered sooner...who are you?"

Brahms stared down at the short man before him. His brown hair combed expertly to the side, his brows immaculate under his thick glasses. He wore a glowering expression, his lips in a tight line.

The man clears his throat, "Herbert, Herbert West." Brahms makes note of his American accent, "I believe this paper is for the lady of this residence." Herbert whips the paper in front of him, his expression changing to say "Well, hurry and take it!"

"Mr. West."

"Herbert."

"Herbert, If by Lady you mean, Gerti? She passed awa-"

"I don't mean your dead wife."

Brahms's eyes narrow at Herbert. He opens his mouth the speak.

"I mean, Y/n. She is the only lady living here. So Dan tells me."

Brahms's jaw slackens, "Dan." He says more to himself.

"Yes, it's an invitation to a formal at the university. He already invited her. Just wanted to make sure she got all the details, it's all there on the paper." Herbert whips it again in front of Brahms.

Brahms yanks the paper from Herbert, eyes scanning it wildly.

University of London

Residents of Handel Mansions we formally invite you to bring along the most beautiful dame for the start of our fall formal.

September 28th, 1900

Entrance fee 1 pound, with a beautiful dame on your arm the fee is waved.

Brahms stares back at Herbert who pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose, "Well," Herbert begins, "I figured be best to drop it off for Dan. He's been awfully busy." He flashes a smile to Brahms as he turns, "Dan also says to let Y/n know he wishes her luck at her new job on Robitaille's farm." He turns back around to Brahms, "Oh, it was nice meeting you, Mr.?"

Brahms pauses, clearing his throat, "Brahms Heelshire."

Herbert clicks his tongue, "I knew that." He walks down the stairs, a pep in his step, "Was nice meeting you Mr. Heelshire."

Brahms stares at the short man walking away, nodding to a man walking past. He turns back around, slamming the door behind in, the frame shook.

He stares down at the paper, eyes reading it over and over again. "A formal." He starts, "That Dan..." His breath catches in his chest, "A job?" he questions aloud.

He collapses against his door, slumping over as he crunches the paper in his hands. His thoughts raced to her, cursing himself for not intervening that day she ran into Dan. Wishing he just took the reprimand from his employer and raced in to shove Dan away from you. Creating some fantastical lie as to why he was suddenly there.

Brahms's thoughts slip to his son. Lawrence, his green eyes shine whenever he and Y/n play. He hugs her like he did his mother. How y/n always promises to play with him, tuck him at night. How were you going to tuck him in if you were to be away? How were you going to be there to kiss his little cheek as he falls asleep?

"How are you going to be there for me?"

[love-hatred-stuff]

Villain's girl } Im Changkyun [monsta x]

genre: royal/soldier au, vampire au

warning(s): mentions of war(indirect), kind of kidnapping

word count: 1.9k

He, he was perfect, but I just wasn't ready to get involved with him.

I knew I would regret it because we needed each other. But he just hurt me too much. No, actually I really didn't care about myself. Still, I ran away from him again, probably the most unnecessary decision of my life. The only thing that stood in my way was my fear of the gilding of his life. I simply wasn't worth it, was I?

before:...

I was lying on a green meadow that was on a mountain. Hundreds of Lisianthus flowers had grown next to me. I loved them, their scent, their colors and also their sizes. They had a calm effect on me because I had known them since my short childhood.

I've been looking after myself since I was ten years old. My parents? Probably dead. They had left me for a reason unknown to me, but I hadn't thought about it for a long time, because it had racked my mind for the next thirteen years after they disappeared.

Now I was lying here and as far as I knew it was my birthday that day. I couldn't exactly remember that date, but I had celebrated it over and over again on the same day for a long time.

It wasn't a big deal to me as it wouldn't change anything in my life but I was finally eighteen.

The sun had just started to rise, but I wanted to start the day like this, with a quiet hour on my favorite meadow in the morning sun that smiled at me. Unfortunately she was the only one who did that.

Often times I would lie there all night and watch the stars. I was more than lonely, for many years I hadn't met anyone except soldiers who attacked and burned villages, as well as my house eight years ago.

I lost my parents, my house, my food and everything else I owned. Even if it wasn't much, my already small property shrunk even more. But I had to take it for what I was, what I was trying to do.

Despite my health, which had kept up well, I had thoughts of suicide several times. Jumping off a cliff is, eating any branches and herbs. And after a few temptations, I gave up. I couldn't do that to myself yet.

As slowly as possible, I got up to look for something to eat. I didn't really liked to go hunting because I was very fond of animals and hated to hurt them, so I mostly ate berries or mushrooms.

Except once a week, I took my bow with arrow to get me a hearty meal.

When I finally got up on my two legs, I ran and went to my hut, which I had built a long time ago from branches and bushes.

I was there in no time, but something bothered me. Everything was still in its place, but I could make out a musty smell of smoke, which made me cringe.

I looked around silently and indeed, about half a mile away, a huge gray cloud was making its way through the trees.

My heart pounded alarm and without thinking twice, I sprinted in the opposite direction from which the possible fire was coming.

At the moment I didn't care about my growling stomach, nor my hut.

After a while of running I could hear voices in the direction I was walking towards.

I slowly walked slowly in order to be able to listen to every sound, no matter how small. But suddenly a soldier was standing in front of me who looked at me with a grin. I was wearing only a thin, white, yet dirty dress that hung airily up to my knees.

Uncomfortable, that's how I felt. I had never had closer contact with men, how could I (?).

"Well, who do we have here?" The soldier mockingly said.

I just widened my eyes, not to mention my mouth, which had been open since I saw him.

After a short time, more and more soldiers came and looked at me, but I was frozen. People were so fascinating but at the same time so nauseating. The soldier, who was still grinning stupidly at me, stepped closer and grabbed my hand.

"The little one must have forgotten how to speak. But she is breathtakingly beautiful. Take a look at her, guys!" He asked his men to examine me too, which is why they all took a few steps closer.

"Hey!" I heard it from not far away, in the woods.

The one whose voice it was now also ran towards me, which made me take some steps back.

"Don't touch her! She's an innocent one!" The soldier who was now standing in my immediate vicinity.

Fortunately for me, he now attracted the attention that had been on me. He pushed the others away from me, who then stumbled backwards. Then he grabbed my wrist and I felt a heat rise in me instantly, it was a completely new feeling.

I looked into a prominent face with defined cheekbones, which made him look very masculine to me. He looked like someone that could be royal, naturally beautiful.

He looked at me out of his intense brown eyes in which I could have lost myself in, in a matter of seconds.

He raised his hand, pushed a strand of hair out of my face and touched my cheek in the process. All I could do was to stay still like a statue and admire his figure.

His dark black hair that was a little messed up and some strands also graced his face.

A cold but pleasant shiver ran down my spine from his touch. I was fascinated by his looks, it seemed like he looked like a friendly devil. Although his features seemed absolutely flawless, he radiated a dark aura. I couldn't see it but I could sense it. He also had broad shoulders from which two muscular arms protruded. He was looking like a God next to me.

"She really is quite acceptable. Nevertheless, she has to come with me." He pulled me by the arm to the horses, which were not far away at a campsite.

Damn. I should have run faster, now I have to go with them if I don't get a chance to get out of here. I blamed myself silently.

The men were in the majority and clearly superior to me.

The Soldier's grin was quite strong and even when we were already in one of the tents, he was still holding onto my arm tightly. After we I hissed in pain.

Besides all that, I was still totally in shock as it was my first close contact with people in many years.

Suddenly he stopped and took a close look at my body, me not really thinking anything, because I first had to get used to people's behavior and body language.

With his gaze he stopped where he had gripped me tightly to probably prevent me from running away, but slowly the pressure got too big and hurt. Immediately he let go, but he took a closer look at the now yellow spots that adorned my arm.

They weren't the only wounds I had, I kept getting injured and accordingly had blood wounds or scratches all over the place. We were alone in the tent and he finally broke the silence.

"Who did this to you?" He asked, pointing to my wounds, like the blood stain on my dress, over my stomach. At first I didn't know what he meant but then I understood. He meant if I had been hurt by someone else.

"Nobody." I answered clearly and looked up into his wonderful eyes that flashed at me.

"What's your name?" Was his next question.

"Y/n. I think." I guessed to myself.

My name had never been relevant, but I still had vague memories from my childhood and how I was often addressed by that name back then. In the other moment, his gaze softened. He put a strand behind my ear again, as he had earlier. My attention went to his full lips which he twisted into a small grin.

“You are beautiful, Y/n. You will be mine I promise it. Nobody's going to get you." He said with determination.

What did he say? Was that just a compliment? If so, then they sound really nice, but actually I didn't really know what they meant to me. Although I could speak his language fluently and had a good vocabulary to choose from, I wasn't up to date.

"What do you mean?" I was taught to ask when you didn't understand someone, so I did just that.

"Means that we will take you to the palace where you can be sold." He suddenly changed his face and removed his hand from my cheek where it had lingered for a moment.

He had just changed his mind from one second to the other. He wanted me to be his and complimented me, so what now? Now he just wanted to drag me along and let me get sold? Great, I probably wouldn't find a way out on all these soldiers.

"But, to whom should I be sold?" If it was to my advantage I would accept it, then I would no longer be alone and would finally be among people who were equal to me.

"To some rich snob." He simply replied.

I was surprised at his sudden change of heart, but it was the chance for me to finally escape this hole. It had made me sink deeper and deeper until that point. I was redeemed.

"You have to change. We'll stay here one more night before we leave." He stepped away from me and took a white dress down from a kind of drawer, to give it to me afterwards.

A little baffled, I stood there and took the soft fabric towards me. It was soft and embroidered with small flowers.

"Thanks, where should I change and where should I sleep?" I asked briefly.

"Change here. There's a bed back there, behind the curtain. You will sleep with me, I don’t want you to run away." He answered less summarily.

Only after a short moment I could understand what he wanted from me. He was still standing right in front of my feet and looking down at me.

"So I'm supposed to change here and now?" I asked with disbelief in my voice.

"Yes, you should." He persisted.

I suspected he wouldn't give in, so I told him to at least turn around. Then he innocently raised his hands to shoulder height and obeyed my request. When he let his hands fall again, I pushed my dirty dress off my body, which meant that I stood in front of him, completely bare for a moment. Fortunately, he was standing with his back turned to me. But even if not, I would probably have obeyed, because I didn't know whether I corresponded to the typical image of women and had never had unpleasant situations like this before. That's why I never had a reason to be ashamed of my body. But as I stood in front of him I realized how important it actually was to be able to see someone like that.

I quickly slipped into the fresh dress, which clung to my thin body and my delicate curves. It actually looked very pretty, but I could hardly judge it because I still had no taste for fashion.

"You can turn around." I wanted to point out, but my words got stuck in my throat when I noticed that he had already turned around.

I had focused on my dress the whole time and trusted it. Obviously this was a mistake.

-to be continued-

[maxheadley]

Arguments and offers

Fire cackled as a foggy trail of blackish-gray smoke whisked up into the chimney. The air was thick and warm, a rather extreme drastic change from the blizzard howling on outside. Sebastian dozed on an dark burgundy armchair. His head tilted onto his open palm, squishing his cheek upward. Ben slightly chuckled, seeing drool trail down the corners of Sebastian's mouth. He closed the book he currently was reading and sat it on the couch next to his sleeping hellhound. He got up and made his way over to his beloved Sebastian. He smoothed down Sebastian's ruffled dark hair gently. Ben admired the beautiful man more than anything in the world. Nothing mattered to him like Sebastian. Seeing him peacefully sleeping made Ben so happy.

He deserved peace after all. After all the terrible, rambunctious, raucous past year. Finally, the two could settle down, raise their children and figure out the next step in their future.

Ben felt a relief fall off his shoulders. He could finally breathe. Sebastian could finally breathe. He walked to the window, drew back the heavy black curtains and leaned against the windowsill. Outside snow drizzled down from the cloudy sky, snow blanketed the ground undisturbed by footsteps or shovels. In the distance, Ben witnessed a couple dancing in their home. A warm light flooded through their window onto the snow, giving a yellow hue to the white color. He noticed the loving way the blonde girl gazed up at her husband as they moved slowly across the floor. The way the man shared the same unconditional expression. That was true love, Ben thought sweetly.

Eventually, Ben saw them break apart and blow out the candle of light. The last light on the street winked out leaving nothing but darkness, moon, and bright, white snow. He stared at the waning moon set upon the sky for what seemed like ages until he heard someone clear his throat. Whipping around, allow the curtains to close, he saw Sebastian stretching, reminding Ben briefly of a domestic cat. He coughed once as he stood up.

In the dim firelight, shadows were cast on Sebastian's pristine face. He couldn't quite read Sebastian's facial expression, but Ben assumed tiredness sunk into his eyes, giving him a depressed, resigned look. "I'm quite surprised you hadn't woken me up to go to bed. Are you not tired?" Sebastian asked in a groggy voice.

"Not really, no. But you can head to bed. I want to finish up the chapter I am currently abating." Ben said, walking over to the couch where Nikolai was curled up and picked up his book. book. He counted the pages. "I have about three pages to read." Ben plopped down onto the couch, laying his book on his lap.

"Ben.. How are you feeling?" Sebastian asked, putting his large delicate hands on Ben's shoulders. Ben leaned his head onto Sebastian's core, relishing in the heat that emitted there. "Cold for the most part, but emotionally, I feel empty as there is nothing presenting itself to us as problem needing fixing. I like that we're getting a break from a year's worth of drama and battles, but I miss helping and I enjoy relishing in the victory it gives me." He responded sadly.

Sebastian's expression remained bleak and complacent up until Ben's response. He made a startled gasp and stepped back. He ended up glowering at Ben. His silvery-pale blue eyes alight with astonishment and anger. "How can you say that? We lost nearly everything because of Alura and Chasm and you miss it? It cost Creedence and Ella their lives!"

Ben turned slightly to avoid kneeing his hellhound, Cheri in the face and sighed. "I know, but you're forgetting what we won. Magnus has his freedom back as well as his kingdom's freedom. You discovered you had a twin brother, you never knew about and I found out I had siblings than just Marlee. And everyone is safe from the corruption of Alura thanks to Anazul."

"Many people have given up their lives for the sake of keeping everyone safe and saving their kingdoms. Creedence didn't give up his life for you just so you could jump right back into warfare. Ella wouldn't have wanted us to continue to fight enemies without evidence. She would've wanted us to fight accordingly and have the evidence proving they are the enemy. We're finally at peace. Do you want to give that up?" Sebastian said, coldly. "Or have it taken from us again!"

Ben noticed Sebastian was shaking. His anxiety must've spiked up right alongside the anger he pressed into his words. Ben got up slowly and strode over to him. "No. No. No." He shook his head. His black hair falling over his eyebrows. "Listen. What I'm saying is I miss being active and helping with problems. We've been cooped up in this house since Mitas discovered a spell to resurrect Creedence and Ella, hoping to see if necromancy actually works." Ben took his beloved's hands calmly, brushing his thumb over the large knuckles soothingly. "And I was thinking of applying for a position in the Races Representative's Court. Being a representative for my side of the wolves would help me stay actively inclined and informed of problems involving my kind." He added, seeing how skeptical Sebastian remained.

Sebastian cued in a massive eyeroll and cast a glare in Ben's direction. "I understand that but soon we'll have more responsibilities then we know what to do with. Remember our children will come soon and they will be a handful. Not to mention, you have two little girls who do need their father. You don't have to be a representative.." He argued.

"I can juggle both responsibilities." Ben growled, a little apoplectically.

Sebastian yanked his hands out of Ben's and turned away slowly as if trying to figure out what next he should say in the argument to win. Ben knew he wouldn't. Once Ben had his mind set on something, it became important to him and he was determined to accomplish it. Ben needed this, no matter what Sebastian said.

"Sebastian, being a representative for the wolf race would help me gain the leadership experience I need to take over the Wolf Pack from Callista when she chooses me for the next out of me and Ella. I need this and you're also on the representatives council for the vampires. It's no big deal."

Sebastian glanced at him appalled. "I have to be on the damned representatives council because I am the King now! And Anazul forced Crescent to take over his father's seat. He wasn't prepared for being a council member at only fourteen, and I can tell you're not either. You still have the mindset of a teenager and don't even deny that because I can read your thoughts. You're rash and careless. You don't think about how you affect me and others."

Ben resisted the urge to flinch at the severe tone Sebastian used. He could only stare blindsided about how Sebastian reacted, his mouth slightly agape.

Sebastian must've seen the flash of astonishment, anger and disappointment that filtered into his eyes before Ben schooled his expression into being expressionless, because Sebastian bit his lip harshly. Anxiety flushed his cheeks. "I didn't mean... I meant that you shouldn't force yourself into a role unnecessarily for the sake of gaining someone's approval.. You're still-"

Ben backed away, shaking his head and turned away this time. Anger rebelled in his blood. He scrunched up his nose, breathing heavily and growled, fuming all over the place inside. "You don't think I'm mature enough for this, do you?"

"Ben, that's not what i-"

"NO! That's exactly what you're saying Sebastian!" Ben whirled on Sebastian. His eyes were wild with fury.

Sebastian flinched, looking down at his shaking large hands and hissed. "Alright, fine. I do think you're immature and you're proving my point by reacting like a complete child."

Ben wrinkled up his nose once again. "I thought you'd support me in this endeavor because that's what your supposed to do in a relationship, but you don't want me to? Because I'm immature?"

"What I'm saying is, you don't know what we are held responsible for! There's so many factors to consider in helping run the races and we have to be the face of our face. Articulate and under control. We can't react immaturely otherwise we set a bad example of our race. You would most likely hear something you don't agree with or like and react differently than a representative usually does." Sebastian informed him lightly, putting a huge amount of effort in leaving the scorn out of his words and tone.

Ben said nothing. He reacted badly in the past. But every since the Great Blood War, his conscience was made aware. He used to actively torture people and himself. He hurt others intentionally. He knew his impulsiveness would be his downfall, but having Sebastian tell him this, made everything he'd done seem worthless and he should be guilty, but he wasn't. He had no regrets or remorse for what he'd done.

And he knew it.

"You know we can hear you right?" Said Crescent's high pitched voice. Hitting puberty seemed to cause Crescent's unusual soft voice to be a tad squeaky. Ben whirled around to see Crescent standing on the spiraling staircase with Caereli a couple steps higher. Both look wide eyed, fearful and concerned. Ben couldn't help but grab his black button up coat and shrug it on. Glancing at a paling Sebastian, he shook his head. "I need to be alone." He ran out the door before Sebastian could protest.

He didn't want to hear anymore. He couldn't, so Ben ran out into the storm, leaving Sebastian standing there in the doorway, his pale eyes trailing after him with sadness and dying anger wallowing in their depths.

Sebastian perched on the coal black rooftop of his home. His feet dangled over the edge barefoot. He should've been concerned his toes were numb, and his foot felt like ice. However, Sebastian's mind was on other things.

Ben hadn't come home last night. Sebastian stayed up all night, worrying and going over the events of last night in his hand. He regretted saying what he did, a million times over. Why did he have to call Ben immature? He meant what he said. Ben couldn't be ready for the task, no matter how much he tried to convince Sebastian. But Sebastian felt the guilt weigh in on his fragile heart.

What else would he lose? He lost the only other person he'd ever loved deeply not too long ago. His brother. Would he survive if he lost Ben too? Sebastian had no answer for the questions he continued to ask himself repeatedly mentally.

Salty tears treaded down his pale cheeks. He tasted his own tears passing off his lips to his thighs below. He wiped at his face. There was no point in killing his heart by crying and wallowing in self pity. He had more dignity than that.

He used his dark burgundy sweater to cover up his freezing hands as he leaned forward. He cast his pale blue eyes down onto the streets below. Children and teenagers were running about, playing games or hanging out with one another.

Sebastian saw a young couple posing for pictures in front of the abandoned Cahya Castle. He wondered if they realized why their King hasn't set foot among it's corridors and taken use inside. He wondered if they knew what a toll those walls would take on his fragility. He wondered if he, himself would ever rightfully inhabit the old, dusty castle. The answer would presumably be no. For now. He may change his mind when his heart doesn't hurt.

Sebastian leaped from the roof, landing directly in front of two teenagers and hissed, leaving no room for emotion. "Do you two have any respect for your fallen king or do you think his death is a joke?"

The young male startled, turned around and lowered his old, classic camera. His dark green eyes wide and his mouth agape at the sight of Sebastian. The young female looked down at her pink heels, avoiding Sebastian's expressionless gaze. Clearly embarrassed to be caught by the new King, the former King's brother. Probably an extremely awkward moment for all three. The young male started, but then shut his mouth, and stared fearfully at Sebastian.

"The castle isn't your playground for pictures." Sebastian added, looking less threatening but still remained firm. He didn't want to be feared. Not really. He wanted respect, and while one may gain respect through fear, he wanted respect through love, compassion, and fairness. He did not want to be a cruel man like his abusive, corrupted father.

"We know, but she liked the setting. I couldn't coax Melonie out of it. I'm sorry, King Sebastian. We don't mean any disrespect to King Creedence or any of the Royal family." The young male acknowledged sweetly.

"What's your name, kid?" Sebastian asked, randomly.

"Reece Lilly, sir."

"Nice to meet you, Reece, and your friend." Sebastian acknowledged Reece's female friend. "But may I speak to you alone? Melonie can run along and wait for you wherever."

Melonie frowned, looking about as stubborn as she could muster into an expression, but said nothing as Reece agreed.

Sebastian began walking with the young male and studied the narrow street ahead of them. "How long have you been doing photography?" Sebastian inquired, inquisitively.

Reece, who stood about five inches shorter, glanced up at Sebastian astonished. "I-" He cleared his throat, not wanting to squeak or sound pitchy. "I have been doing this since my father found this camera exploring the Sessian Forest. He gifted me this at twelve. I'm fourteen now. He thought I should leave behind a legacy of capturing the world and it's inhabitants through photograph." Reece confidently answered, sidestepping a couple of little girls who pushed around a small, pink rubber ball teasing their fluffy, white hellhound. Sebastian chuckled, seeing the mischief in the children's eyes, and shook his head, smiling. "You're young to be thinking about a legacy to leave behind? Do you plan on dying anytime, Reece?"

Reece took several minutes to respond. He probably had to think about what kind of answer he should give his King. What would Ben say? Sebastian thought bitterly. When Reece finally responded, there was deep sadness lacing his words. "No one knows when he or she may die. There could be alot of factors moving towards your eternal death or your eternal life. God is the only one who truly knows and decides are death. Why shouldn't I get ahead and create a legacy? My father died before he could create his own."

Sebastian winced, looking down at the young boy. "Reece, your father, did create a legacy."

"Really? What is it? Did you know him?" Reece shot questions at Sebastian like a train speedily running down it's iron train tracks.

"I don't know who your father is, but I do know, his legacy lives on in his children. You. You are his legacy. You're his greatest creation and that is something you should know he is most proud of."

Reece paused, his boots crunching on the pebbles underfoot. "Forgive me for asking, but how do you know, Sir?"

Shy as Reece pretended to be, Sebastian gave him credit for asking the tough questions, the questions no one is brave enough to ask and some aren't brave enough to answer. He smiled, shoving his cold hands into his black pants pockets. "Because every parent is a creator and should be proud of their creation."

"Was your parents proud of their creations?" Reece asked, causing Sebastian's heart to palpitate for a moment.

"I only ever had my brother and his wife. My parents never cared for me, but perhaps their proud of their other children. Who knows? What I can tell you, is even if Creedence wasn't my father, and Elona wasn't my mother, they were proud of me and left me their most precious creations in my safe hands." He smiled, up the gray, cloudy sky. "And they can count on me to raise them as they did me."

Reece yelped, tripping over a large rock because he looked up like Sebastian and landed awkward on the middle of rusted, train tracks.

Sebastian chuckled, kneeling in front of the little photographer. "You alright, love?"

"Just shocked is all."

"Not too surprising, but I'd forgotten these tracks were here. No train has been here since the First War." Sebastian's eyes trailed down the train tracks noticing how it curved and fled into the mountains beyond to Lord knows where. Probably to the abandoned Nelessa train station, rotting somewhere beyond the Golnessa Mountains.

"Apparently, none of the Queens of Legend cared to remove the tracks. They're sure a hazard." Said, a very familiar voice. Sebastian scampered to his feet and whirled around to find himself facing Ben. Of course, it was Ben. It always was Ben.

Sebastian could hear Reece mumbling profanities under his breathe as he brushed debris particles off his stark white pants. Ignoring, the teenager, he zeroed in his focus on Ben. He frowned, catching glimpses of the tear stains on Ben's and the puffiness of his red eyes. He had been crying. Sebastian hadn't thought of the consequences and damage his words may have caused. Guilt racked his heart like an iron grip of fist crushing a rock to dust. He breathed, schooling his face into a neutral expression. "Ben.. How did you find me?" He immediately regretted the question as Ben could sniff out his scent among other mingling scents and track him down easily. What a stupid question, he cursed himself mentally.

"I didn't. You found me, actually. I camped in the hammock over there. I caught a whiff of your scent and the boy's before I heard your footsteps crunching among the snow. I waited to see what you were doing with him til now." Ben gestured to a turquoise and red hammock tied between to large oak trees.

"Wait! You're Ben? The infamous lover of Sebastian?" Reece said, excitedly and very picthy. His voice rose several octaves. Sebastian's ear began to ring. "I've always wanted to meet the warrior who swept my King's feet out from underneath him and brought him out of his shell! He's so involved now with his warriors, including me and it's so wonderful. Thank you so much, Ben!"

Ben flinched, his expression guarded. "Um, you're welcome?"

Sebastian clamped a hand over Reece's mouth to keep him from blabbering about and killing his ears again. "If I let you go, will you be quiet?" Sebastian asked, his voice rough.

Reece nodded and Sebastian released him, shooting a glance that said sorry to Ben, who was grinning. Clearly, he thought the encounter was hilarious. Sebastian might've smacked him if he'd been anyone else, but for some reason, Ben's grin melted his heart.

"Ben, I apologize for what I said yesterday. I was exhausted and overreacted which was immaturely of me." Sebastian tried to keep his voice steady and not stressed.

Ben looked away, pulling his gray coat closer to him and sighed, his breath making circles in the cold air. "Don't apologize for being right. You were right. I am immature and I do need to grow up. But I think putting myself in a setting of maturity and grace will help me learn to be an adult."

Sebastian saw his heterochromic pale green and bright blue eyes were glossy with unshed tears. He longed to hold his partner, to console him, but figured Ben would reject the affection. Comforting came easy to Ben, but as for being comforted, was a difficult and different game. Sebastian stepped closer, ignoring the fact he stepped on Reece's foot and his yelp. He touched Ben's cool, flushed red cheek. "I still think you shouldn't put too much responsibility and pressure on yourself, but I will support your decision whatever it may be. Because I love you and I don't want to lose you. I never want to lose you."

Ben nuzzled his palm with his cheek, closing his eyes. "I love you so much." A small, stray tear trailed down his cheek and Sebastian hastily wiped it away.

Reece said, in awe. "You two are such a successful couple. I wish I had something special like you two do."

Sebastian momentarily forgotten the teenager was standing their witnessing their reconciliation. He shot one last look at Ben, who opened his eyes and gazed down at the young teenager calmly, and smiled over at Reece. "Isn't Melonie your girlfriend?"

Reece laughed, looking embarrassed, and awkward especially among the presence of two very much in love men. "Melonie is my sister. I don't have a girlfriend, but I do have a small crush on a girl." He rubbed his slender, tan hands together as if he were warming them.

The only one likely to be extremely cold, was Ben. Being a vampire meant not being bothered by the bipolar weather, though Sebastian still had the blood of a mortal, he could feel the cold but wasn't very bothered.

"Maybe we can help you get your first girlfriend." Ben suggested before Sebastian could form a thought other than how red Ben's cheeks had turned.

"No.. I couldn't possibly ask you to do that.." Reece's cheeks flushed beet red. Either embarrassed or shocked, Sebastian could tell by reading his face. However, being able to hear his thoughts, Reece wanted very much for him and Ben to help him.

"You didn't have to ask, we're offering. Besides, I think Crescent and Caereli would be grateful to have new friends too." Sebastian intercepted Ben's lazy response.

"You seriously want to help a peasant like me? Why?"

Sebastian smiled over at Ben, who shared the same smile. "Because once upon a time, we had help getting together. My siblings were very persistent. We're happy to help someone who deserves it. Love is powerful and-"

"And it never fails." Ben finished for him.

Sebastian seen the wheels turning inside Reece's head. Ideas floating around. Thoughts of disbelief and excitement flooding Sebastian's mind. His dark green eyes met his. He parted his lips and emitted a sound, lost amidst the thoughts driving into his head. He presumed the teenager said, yes.

And Sebastian, really, genuinely smiled.

[ghoulelegy]

When You Trans Your Gender (Transfem. Version)

Ficlet I wrote at like 3am cus I couldn't sleep lesssss goooooo

Summary: Terzo and Cardinal Copia help you take your first shot of hormone replacement therapy.

Pairing: Terzo & Cardinal Copia / Transfem. Reader

Words: 700ish?

Content warning: Needles/Injections

Contains:

Fluff Safe For Work Platonic First Dose of HRT

Read Trans Your Gender (Transfem. version) on AO3

Or the Transmasc. Version here.

When you came out to the ministry as transgender, their support was unwavering. After updating your name and pronouns to your preference, they promptly arranged a referral to the gender clinic, and after some time, you received a prescription to begin hormone replacement therapy.

And luckily, you had Terzo and Copia to show you the ropes.

Copia knocked softly on your ajar bedroom door, holding up a box containing the precious vial of estrogen. Your eyes lit up, and you couldn't help but chuckle when you noticed Buttercup, one of his rattinos, perched on his shoulder.

“I picked up your prescription, topolina,” he spoke softly, his voice filled with warmth. "You can come take it, si, si, we can help you inject it. My brother and I have experience. And Buttercup is here for the…emotional support"

Gratitude filled your voice as you replied, "Thanks, Copia. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Well, good thing I'm here then. Come, come, come, I'll take you to the infirmary."

You followed him into the room, where Terzo was waiting, a bright smile underneath his papal paint. He reached out and gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "We're in this together. Now, I'll help you with your first injection, and we'll make sure you're comfortable with everything. Okay?"

You nodded. "Mhm."

"How about I give it to you since it's your first time?" Terzo suggested.

"Sure. That'll be great actually." 

"Okay, Bella, turn around," Terzo softly instructed. As you turned, he prepared the injection with utmost care and expertise. The room held an unusual intimacy, with Terzo's gentle touch and Copia's unwavering presence (he kept shuffling out a thumbs up whenever you looked at him.) Your heart raced with a blend of excitement and nervousness. The vial of estrogen symbolized the promise of your journey ahead, and you knew you were in capable hands.

Terzo's voice remained soothing as he talked you through the process. "Just relax, principessa. This will be a small step on your path to becoming your true self." He carefully administered the injection, and you were pleasantly surprised when you barely felt a thing. The sensation of the needle was fleeting, but it triggered a memory of the day you first confided in Terzo and Copia about your true self. Their unwavering support, like an unspoken promise, had carried you through countless moments of doubt.

Your heart raced. This first injection symbolized not just a step in your transition but a testament to the strength of your strength with Terzo and Copia. It was a reminder that, despite the challenges ahead, you had them. 

You made it.

"All done now. Terzo's smile beamed as he ruffled your hair. "That was perfect."

Copia pulled you into a hug, his voice choked with pride. "You did great, topolina. "We're here for you every step of the way."

"I'll give you this," Terzo said, handing you the now empty vial with a warm smile. You took the vial, touched by his gesture. "Thanks, Terzo." A reminder of your first shot, you thought, holding the vial close.

He leaned in a little closer, his voice gentle. "And remember, if you ever need help with future shots, just come find me, okay?"

"I will," you said with a smile.

"Also, y-you might feel a bit of a burning or uncomfortable sensation later on…yes?" Copia continued. "It should die down by itself, but if there's any problem, let one of us know, carina."

"Yes, absolutely. Do let us know," Terzo added. "Your health is important to us"

"Alrighty," you chuckled.

"Remember, we're proud of you, always" Copia softly embraces you once more, before being joined by Terzo. "And look, Buttercup is proud of you too" he holds her out in the air. You let her sniff you, before you gently scritch her face. "Mr Squeakers is sleepy I presume."

"Yep - Oh speaking of - I recently found out that Mr. Squeakers is a girl, actually. I'll love her no matter what, and in the same way we'll love you no matter what"

"Ah. Fuck you, you're going to make me sappy" you chuckle.

-fin-

[maxheadley]

Arguments and offers

Fire cackled as a foggy trail of blackish-gray smoke whisked up into the chimney. The air was thick and warm, a rather extreme drastic change from the blizzard howling on outside. Sebastian dozed on an dark burgundy armchair. His head tilted onto his open palm, squishing his cheek upward. Ben slightly chuckled, seeing drool trail down the corners of Sebastian's mouth. He closed the book he currently was reading and sat it on the couch next to his sleeping hellhound. He got up and made his way over to his beloved Sebastian. He smoothed down Sebastian's ruffled dark hair gently. Ben admired the beautiful man more than anything in the world. Nothing mattered to him like Sebastian. Seeing him peacefully sleeping made Ben so happy.

He deserved peace after all. After all the terrible, rambunctious, raucous past year. Finally, the two could settle down, raise their children and figure out the next step in their future.

Ben felt a relief fall off his shoulders. He could finally breathe. Sebastian could finally breathe. He walked to the window, drew back the heavy black curtains and leaned against the windowsill. Outside snow drizzled down from the cloudy sky, snow blanketed the ground undisturbed by footsteps or shovels. In the distance, Ben witnessed a couple dancing in their home. A warm light flooded through their window onto the snow, giving a yellow hue to the white color. He noticed the loving way the blonde girl gazed up at her husband as they moved slowly across the floor. The way the man shared the same unconditional expression. That was true love, Ben thought sweetly.

Eventually, Ben saw them break apart and blow out the candle of light. The last light on the street winked out leaving nothing but darkness, moon, and bright, white snow. He stared at the waning moon set upon the sky for what seemed like ages until he heard someone clear his throat. Whipping around, allow the curtains to close, he saw Sebastian stretching, reminding Ben briefly of a domestic cat. He coughed once as he stood up.

In the dim firelight, shadows were cast on Sebastian's pristine face. He couldn't quite read Sebastian's facial expression, but Ben assumed tiredness sunk into his eyes, giving him a depressed, resigned look. "I'm quite surprised you hadn't woken me up to go to bed. Are you not tired?" Sebastian asked in a groggy voice.

"Not really, no. But you can head to bed. I want to finish up the chapter I am currently abating." Ben said, walking over to the couch where Nikolai was curled up and picked up his book. book. He counted the pages. "I have about three pages to read." Ben plopped down onto the couch, laying his book on his lap.

"Ben.. How are you feeling?" Sebastian asked, putting his large delicate hands on Ben's shoulders. Ben leaned his head onto Sebastian's core, relishing in the heat that emitted there. "Cold for the most part, but emotionally, I feel empty as there is nothing presenting itself to us as problem needing fixing. I like that we're getting a break from a year's worth of drama and battles, but I miss helping and I enjoy relishing in the victory it gives me." He responded sadly.

Sebastian's expression remained bleak and complacent up until Ben's response. He made a startled gasp and stepped back. He ended up glowering at Ben. His silvery-pale blue eyes alight with astonishment and anger. "How can you say that? We lost nearly everything because of Alura and Chasm and you miss it? It cost Creedence and Ella their lives!"

Ben turned slightly to avoid kneeing his hellhound, Cheri in the face and sighed. "I know, but you're forgetting what we won. Magnus has his freedom back as well as his kingdom's freedom. You discovered you had a twin brother, you never knew about and I found out I had siblings than just Marlee. And everyone is safe from the corruption of Alura thanks to Anazul."

"Many people have given up their lives for the sake of keeping everyone safe and saving their kingdoms. Creedence didn't give up his life for you just so you could jump right back into warfare. Ella wouldn't have wanted us to continue to fight enemies without evidence. She would've wanted us to fight accordingly and have the evidence proving they are the enemy. We're finally at peace. Do you want to give that up?" Sebastian said, coldly. "Or have it taken from us again!"

Ben noticed Sebastian was shaking. His anxiety must've spiked up right alongside the anger he pressed into his words. Ben got up slowly and strode over to him. "No. No. No." He shook his head. His black hair falling over his eyebrows. "Listen. What I'm saying is I miss being active and helping with problems. We've been cooped up in this house since Mitas discovered a spell to resurrect Creedence and Ella, hoping to see if necromancy actually works." Ben took his beloved's hands calmly, brushing his thumb over the large knuckles soothingly. "And I was thinking of applying for a position in the Races Representative's Court. Being a representative for my side of the wolves would help me stay actively inclined and informed of problems involving my kind." He added, seeing how skeptical Sebastian remained.

Sebastian cued in a massive eyeroll and cast a glare in Ben's direction. "I understand that but soon we'll have more responsibilities then we know what to do with. Remember our children will come soon and they will be a handful. Not to mention, you have two little girls who do need their father. You don't have to be a representative.." He argued.

"I can juggle both responsibilities." Ben growled, a little apoplectically.

Sebastian yanked his hands out of Ben's and turned away slowly as if trying to figure out what next he should say in the argument to win. Ben knew he wouldn't. Once Ben had his mind set on something, it became important to him and he was determined to accomplish it. Ben needed this, no matter what Sebastian said.

"Sebastian, being a representative for the wolf race would help me gain the leadership experience I need to take over the Wolf Pack from Callista when she chooses me for the next out of me and Ella. I need this and you're also on the representatives council for the vampires. It's no big deal."

Sebastian glanced at him appalled. "I have to be on the damned representatives council because I am the King now! And Anazul forced Crescent to take over his father's seat. He wasn't prepared for being a council member at only fourteen, and I can tell you're not either. You still have the mindset of a teenager and don't even deny that because I can read your thoughts. You're rash and careless. You don't think about how you affect me and others."

Ben resisted the urge to flinch at the severe tone Sebastian used. He could only stare blindsided about how Sebastian reacted, his mouth slightly agape.

Sebastian must've seen the flash of astonishment, anger and disappointment that filtered into his eyes before Ben schooled his expression into being expressionless, because Sebastian bit his lip harshly. Anxiety flushed his cheeks. "I didn't mean... I meant that you shouldn't force yourself into a role unnecessarily for the sake of gaining someone's approval.. You're still-"

Ben backed away, shaking his head and turned away this time. Anger rebelled in his blood. He scrunched up his nose, breathing heavily and growled, fuming all over the place inside. "You don't think I'm mature enough for this, do you?"

"Ben, that's not what i-"

"NO! That's exactly what you're saying Sebastian!" Ben whirled on Sebastian. His eyes were wild with fury.

Sebastian flinched, looking down at his shaking large hands and hissed. "Alright, fine. I do think you're immature and you're proving my point by reacting like a complete child."

Ben wrinkled up his nose once again. "I thought you'd support me in this endeavor because that's what your supposed to do in a relationship, but you don't want me to? Because I'm immature?"

"What I'm saying is, you don't know what we are held responsible for! There's so many factors to consider in helping run the races and we have to be the face of our face. Articulate and under control. We can't react immaturely otherwise we set a bad example of our race. You would most likely hear something you don't agree with or like and react differently than a representative usually does." Sebastian informed him lightly, putting a huge amount of effort in leaving the scorn out of his words and tone.

Ben said nothing. He reacted badly in the past. But every since the Great Blood War, his conscience was made aware. He used to actively torture people and himself. He hurt others intentionally. He knew his impulsiveness would be his downfall, but having Sebastian tell him this, made everything he'd done seem worthless and he should be guilty, but he wasn't. He had no regrets or remorse for what he'd done.

And he knew it.

"You know we can hear you right?" Said Crescent's high pitched voice. Hitting puberty seemed to cause Crescent's unusual soft voice to be a tad squeaky. Ben whirled around to see Crescent standing on the spiraling staircase with Caereli a couple steps higher. Both look wide eyed, fearful and concerned. Ben couldn't help but grab his black button up coat and shrug it on. Glancing at a paling Sebastian, he shook his head. "I need to be alone." He ran out the door before Sebastian could protest.

He didn't want to hear anymore. He couldn't, so Ben ran out into the storm, leaving Sebastian standing there in the doorway, his pale eyes trailing after him with sadness and dying anger wallowing in their depths.

Sebastian perched on the coal black rooftop of his home. His feet dangled over the edge barefoot. He should've been concerned his toes were numb, and his foot felt like ice. However, Sebastian's mind was on other things.

Ben hadn't come home last night. Sebastian stayed up all night, worrying and going over the events of last night in his hand. He regretted saying what he did, a million times over. Why did he have to call Ben immature? He meant what he said. Ben couldn't be ready for the task, no matter how much he tried to convince Sebastian. But Sebastian felt the guilt weigh in on his fragile heart.

What else would he lose? He lost the only other person he'd ever loved deeply not too long ago. His brother. Would he survive if he lost Ben too? Sebastian had no answer for the questions he continued to ask himself repeatedly mentally.

Salty tears treaded down his pale cheeks. He tasted his own tears passing off his lips to his thighs below. He wiped at his face. There was no point in killing his heart by crying and wallowing in self pity. He had more dignity than that.

He used his dark burgundy sweater to cover up his freezing hands as he leaned forward. He cast his pale blue eyes down onto the streets below. Children and teenagers were running about, playing games or hanging out with one another.

Sebastian saw a young couple posing for pictures in front of the abandoned Cahya Castle. He wondered if they realized why their King hasn't set foot among it's corridors and taken use inside. He wondered if they knew what a toll those walls would take on his fragility. He wondered if he, himself would ever rightfully inhabit the old, dusty castle. The answer would presumably be no. For now. He may change his mind when his heart doesn't hurt.

Sebastian leaped from the roof, landing directly in front of two teenagers and hissed, leaving no room for emotion. "Do you two have any respect for your fallen king or do you think his death is a joke?"

The young male startled, turned around and lowered his old, classic camera. His dark green eyes wide and his mouth agape at the sight of Sebastian. The young female looked down at her pink heels, avoiding Sebastian's expressionless gaze. Clearly embarrassed to be caught by the new King, the former King's brother. Probably an extremely awkward moment for all three. The young male started, but then shut his mouth, and stared fearfully at Sebastian.

"The castle isn't your playground for pictures." Sebastian added, looking less threatening but still remained firm. He didn't want to be feared. Not really. He wanted respect, and while one may gain respect through fear, he wanted respect through love, compassion, and fairness. He did not want to be a cruel man like his abusive, corrupted father.

"We know, but she liked the setting. I couldn't coax Melonie out of it. I'm sorry, King Sebastian. We don't mean any disrespect to King Creedence or any of the Royal family." The young male acknowledged sweetly.

"What's your name, kid?" Sebastian asked, randomly.

"Reece Lilly, sir."

"Nice to meet you, Reece, and your friend." Sebastian acknowledged Reece's female friend. "But may I speak to you alone? Melonie can run along and wait for you wherever."

Melonie frowned, looking about as stubborn as she could muster into an expression, but said nothing as Reece agreed.

Sebastian began walking with the young male and studied the narrow street ahead of them. "How long have you been doing photography?" Sebastian inquired, inquisitively.

Reece, who stood about five inches shorter, glanced up at Sebastian astonished. "I-" He cleared his throat, not wanting to squeak or sound pitchy. "I have been doing this since my father found this camera exploring the Sessian Forest. He gifted me this at twelve. I'm fourteen now. He thought I should leave behind a legacy of capturing the world and it's inhabitants through photograph." Reece confidently answered, sidestepping a couple of little girls who pushed around a small, pink rubber ball teasing their fluffy, white hellhound. Sebastian chuckled, seeing the mischief in the children's eyes, and shook his head, smiling. "You're young to be thinking about a legacy to leave behind? Do you plan on dying anytime, Reece?"

Reece took several minutes to respond. He probably had to think about what kind of answer he should give his King. What would Ben say? Sebastian thought bitterly. When Reece finally responded, there was deep sadness lacing his words. "No one knows when he or she may die. There could be alot of factors moving towards your eternal death or your eternal life. God is the only one who truly knows and decides are death. Why shouldn't I get ahead and create a legacy? My father died before he could create his own."

Sebastian winced, looking down at the young boy. "Reece, your father, did create a legacy."

"Really? What is it? Did you know him?" Reece shot questions at Sebastian like a train speedily running down it's iron train tracks.

"I don't know who your father is, but I do know, his legacy lives on in his children. You. You are his legacy. You're his greatest creation and that is something you should know he is most proud of."

Reece paused, his boots crunching on the pebbles underfoot. "Forgive me for asking, but how do you know, Sir?"

Shy as Reece pretended to be, Sebastian gave him credit for asking the tough questions, the questions no one is brave enough to ask and some aren't brave enough to answer. He smiled, shoving his cold hands into his black pants pockets. "Because every parent is a creator and should be proud of their creation."

"Was your parents proud of their creations?" Reece asked, causing Sebastian's heart to palpitate for a moment.

"I only ever had my brother and his wife. My parents never cared for me, but perhaps their proud of their other children. Who knows? What I can tell you, is even if Creedence wasn't my father, and Elona wasn't my mother, they were proud of me and left me their most precious creations in my safe hands." He smiled, up the gray, cloudy sky. "And they can count on me to raise them as they did me."

Reece yelped, tripping over a large rock because he looked up like Sebastian and landed awkward on the middle of rusted, train tracks.

Sebastian chuckled, kneeling in front of the little photographer. "You alright, love?"

"Just shocked is all."

"Not too surprising, but I'd forgotten these tracks were here. No train has been here since the First War." Sebastian's eyes trailed down the train tracks noticing how it curved and fled into the mountains beyond to Lord knows where. Probably to the abandoned Nelessa train station, rotting somewhere beyond the Golnessa Mountains.

"Apparently, none of the Queens of Legend cared to remove the tracks. They're sure a hazard." Said, a very familiar voice. Sebastian scampered to his feet and whirled around to find himself facing Ben. Of course, it was Ben. It always was Ben.

Sebastian could hear Reece mumbling profanities under his breathe as he brushed debris particles off his stark white pants. Ignoring, the teenager, he zeroed in his focus on Ben. He frowned, catching glimpses of the tear stains on Ben's and the puffiness of his red eyes. He had been crying. Sebastian hadn't thought of the consequences and damage his words may have caused. Guilt racked his heart like an iron grip of fist crushing a rock to dust. He breathed, schooling his face into a neutral expression. "Ben.. How did you find me?" He immediately regretted the question as Ben could sniff out his scent among other mingling scents and track him down easily. What a stupid question, he cursed himself mentally.

"I didn't. You found me, actually. I camped in the hammock over there. I caught a whiff of your scent and the boy's before I heard your footsteps crunching among the snow. I waited to see what you were doing with him til now." Ben gestured to a turquoise and red hammock tied between to large oak trees.

"Wait! You're Ben? The infamous lover of Sebastian?" Reece said, excitedly and very picthy. His voice rose several octaves. Sebastian's ear began to ring. "I've always wanted to meet the warrior who swept my King's feet out from underneath him and brought him out of his shell! He's so involved now with his warriors, including me and it's so wonderful. Thank you so much, Ben!"

Ben flinched, his expression guarded. "Um, you're welcome?"

Sebastian clamped a hand over Reece's mouth to keep him from blabbering about and killing his ears again. "If I let you go, will you be quiet?" Sebastian asked, his voice rough.

Reece nodded and Sebastian released him, shooting a glance that said sorry to Ben, who was grinning. Clearly, he thought the encounter was hilarious. Sebastian might've smacked him if he'd been anyone else, but for some reason, Ben's grin melted his heart.

"Ben, I apologize for what I said yesterday. I was exhausted and overreacted which was immaturely of me." Sebastian tried to keep his voice steady and not stressed.

Ben looked away, pulling his gray coat closer to him and sighed, his breath making circles in the cold air. "Don't apologize for being right. You were right. I am immature and I do need to grow up. But I think putting myself in a setting of maturity and grace will help me learn to be an adult."

Sebastian saw his heterochromic pale green and bright blue eyes were glossy with unshed tears. He longed to hold his partner, to console him, but figured Ben would reject the affection. Comforting came easy to Ben, but as for being comforted, was a difficult and different game. Sebastian stepped closer, ignoring the fact he stepped on Reece's foot and his yelp. He touched Ben's cool, flushed red cheek. "I still think you shouldn't put too much responsibility and pressure on yourself, but I will support your decision whatever it may be. Because I love you and I don't want to lose you. I never want to lose you."

Ben nuzzled his palm with his cheek, closing his eyes. "I love you so much." A small, stray tear trailed down his cheek and Sebastian hastily wiped it away.

Reece said, in awe. "You two are such a successful couple. I wish I had something special like you two do."

Sebastian momentarily forgotten the teenager was standing their witnessing their reconciliation. He shot one last look at Ben, who opened his eyes and gazed down at the young teenager calmly, and smiled over at Reece. "Isn't Melonie your girlfriend?"

Reece laughed, looking embarrassed, and awkward especially among the presence of two very much in love men. "Melonie is my sister. I don't have a girlfriend, but I do have a small crush on a girl." He rubbed his slender, tan hands together as if he were warming them.

The only one likely to be extremely cold, was Ben. Being a vampire meant not being bothered by the bipolar weather, though Sebastian still had the blood of a mortal, he could feel the cold but wasn't very bothered.

"Maybe we can help you get your first girlfriend." Ben suggested before Sebastian could form a thought other than how red Ben's cheeks had turned.

"No.. I couldn't possibly ask you to do that.." Reece's cheeks flushed beet red. Either embarrassed or shocked, Sebastian could tell by reading his face. However, being able to hear his thoughts, Reece wanted very much for him and Ben to help him.

"You didn't have to ask, we're offering. Besides, I think Crescent and Caereli would be grateful to have new friends too." Sebastian intercepted Ben's lazy response.

"You seriously want to help a peasant like me? Why?"

Sebastian smiled over at Ben, who shared the same smile. "Because once upon a time, we had help getting together. My siblings were very persistent. We're happy to help someone who deserves it. Love is powerful and-"

"And it never fails." Ben finished for him.

Sebastian seen the wheels turning inside Reece's head. Ideas floating around. Thoughts of disbelief and excitement flooding Sebastian's mind. His dark green eyes met his. He parted his lips and emitted a sound, lost amidst the thoughts driving into his head. He presumed the teenager said, yes.

And Sebastian, really, genuinely smiled.