#i should put him somewhere as a background lol
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frmisnow · 5 months ago
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BORDEAUX !
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summary. after you realize that the man you had a drunk one night stand with, was in fact your new ceo. you settle on avoiding him as best as you could- but why do you feel so drawn to him?
notes. welcome to a new verse (aka. series), usually most of my series are more fluffy w a touch of smut (besides two whores, one job lol) but this one is gonna be a lot more angsty and smutty! so i hope y'all are into that kinda jam 🍷⭒⋆。˚
warnings /includes. (1.7 k words / suggestive!) non idol! ceo! jungkook x non specified! reader, alcohol, shitty ex :/, jk is an alcohol nerd?, reader kind of uses him to kill bad memories ?, making out
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the air was heavy with the scent of alcohol and smoke melted with the faint music somewhere in the background: jazz, how unfitting for this kind of environment. the enviornment which people go to specifically to escape reality, for a few minutes, maybe a few hours.
the alcohol wasn't bad, at least judging by the wine and it offered a sense of peace or rebellion, stupid fucking rebellion. your ex used to despise wine with all of his heart, he hated the scent of it, didn't want you to drink any of it near him.
he didn't like when you drank alcohol over all, he was stern on the idea of keeping you innoccent. you chugged down the glass like a shot at the sheer memory of the behavior you used to put up with.
the glass hits the table with a dull thud and you could almost hear his voice, scolding you for how reckless you were. you reach out for the bottle, pouring yourself another glass. and this time you savor the taste on your tongue, the rich flavor.
you feel eyes burning into your face, no- not burning, observing. it didn't feel uncomfortable but you could firmly feel them on you. the man's presence cut through the fog of alcohol and self-pity that had settled over you, and for a moment, you simply stared.
you should have looked away, but you didn’t. instead, you lifted your glass to your lips, taking another sip of wine, feeling the liquid slide down your throat, heavy and warm. he watched you, his expression unreadable, but his eyes never leaving yours.
he stands up making his way to you, and suddenly the crowd and all the shitty memories fade away, it was almost like he had a bigger effect on you then the alcohol did and that said a lot.
finally, he spoke, his voice low and smooth, like velvet draped over steel. “mind if i join you?”
the question was formal, did he work in business? no, that would be stupid to assume based of just a question. you nod, slowly but surerly, motioning towards the chair next to you.
he takes the seat next to you, signaling for a nearby waiter, requesting another glass, before turning his attention back to you. his gaze is intense and unwavering, as if he’s trying to see straight through to your soul.
“rough night?” he asks, his tone conversational but his eyes still focused intently on you.
his thigh touched yours, the proximity with somebody you didn't know should make you feel uncomfortable but it strangely didn't. "yeah," you mouth. the whole truth was too complicated, too raw, to lay out infront of a stranger.
a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips, before he speaks again, his voice was soft, almost soothing. "you're downing that glass like it's water."
you look at the almost empty glass that your fingers had been circling around while talking to him, he was right. you didn't even remember how many glasses you had, three perhaps?
"you have a pretty voice," you mumble, finshing what was left of liquid in the glass.
he raised an eyebrow at the compliment, surprised by the sudden comment from you. he can't help but chuckle a little, amused by the drunken confession. "thank you," he replies, sounding sincere.
you both barerly talked, you were two strangers in a cheap bar, why bother talking about boring jobs? the night was young.
the music in the background shifted, a slower, bluesy tune now. the more you looked at him, the more you could firmly feel his thigh pressed into your own. his fingers, tattooed, why hadn't you noticed that earlier? took the wine bottle from earlier, tilting it around to look at the label. he seemed to know the brand, humming in approval.
"it's a good vintage." he says, still holding the bottle but his eyes are on you, studying your face in the dim light.
and this actually managed to crack a smile out of you. it wasn't meant to be a funny comment, in fact he seemed serious about it. was he an alcohol expert? the fact that you knew absolutly nothing about wine made it better.
he takes a sip from his own glass, his eyes never leaving yours. he can't help but find your lack of knowledge about wine oddly endearing.
please, talk me stupid about alcohol. i want to know what rebellion tastes like. the words linger on your tongue but you don't cave into the urge of saying them. i want you to teach me what he was so afraid of showing me.
"i have a whole collection of rare and expensive wines back at my place. some you would never find even in the best bars," he pauses, his hand brushing slightly against your arm.
"are you trying to make me come home with you?" you ask though it's not a question you necessarily need an answer to, you knew what he had meant.
"and if i was?" his eyes stay on yours, tilting his head, "would you come with me?"
stupid fucking question.
the second you step into his apartment, the door closing behind you, he is already on you. his hands are on your waist, holding you firmly in place as his tongue invades your mouth, tasting the mixture of your saliva and the rich flavor of the wine.
when you both take time to breathe, you ask, "so where is the wine you were talking about?" your tone is clearly intoxicated, your eyes a little hazy as he doesn't let go of you and you both stumble towards his living room together. the action seeming strangely domestic.
"it's right there." his voice a tad bit breathless, he motions towards a large display of alcohol, his eyes scanning the selection before settling on a particular bottle.
he reaches for the bottle, the arm around your waist still keeping you close to him, the alcohol clearly making the both of you more touchier then you would be sober.
jungkook holds up the bottle, letting you get a good look at the label. it was an expensive brand, even you could tell that, the words written on it swirling in an elegant script.
you hum, "italy," leaning into his touch sub counciously whilst he drew little circles over the clothed skin, twisting the bottle, "when did you get this?"
"i have a guy who brings me the good stuff from time to time."
your eyes wandered over the display, you wanted to kneel forward to look over the bottles but didn't want to get out of his embrace either.
it felt good, doing everything your ex would scrutinize you for. he'd be disapproving off even letting you look over all of these.
his head made a little motion towards almost like a silent 'go on' like he could firmly hear your thoughts.
the bottles seemed rare, visably very espensive and whilst you looked over the alcohol, he looked at you.
"what do you think?" he asks after a few minutes, tone soft and quiet like he didn't want to disturb you.
"i think i've had enough to drink already but it's all really pretty," you trail off, "you're really pretty"
jungkook smiles at the comment, reaching forward to run his fingers through your hair, the gesture seemingly absentminded yet surprisingly tender, "is that the alcohol talking?"
you shrug, grinning, "i honestly don't know"
he studies your face for a moment, his eyes roving over your features. he reaches out, his fingers grazing your jawline, the touch light and gentle. "you know, you're very pretty yourself," he says, his voice almost a murmur.
the color of the red wine in your hands is now the exact color of your cheeks and your mind is empty as you lean forward to kiss him once more.
this time when your lips meet, it was rather delicate and slow. as you both sat on the ground next to the large display and kissed eachother like it was the end of the world.
and you don't stop when you felt like you couldn't breathe, placing your hand on his chest, feeling the pulse beneath the shirt. this was what drowning memories was all about.
your ex didn't kiss like this. he didn't hold you like this and he most certaintly will never get the chance to redeem himself ever.
you find yourselves sinking to the floor while jungkook craddles your face as if you were something precious, something worth cherishing.
your ex kissed you just to check of the foreplay box, jungkook kisses you because he wants to.
"i want you," you mumur against his lips as you both take time to breathe.
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you wake up to harsh sunlight filtering through the blinds, you realize you're lying on a coach. his coach. the cool leather fabric is a stark contrast to your bare skin, that's when you notice — you’re only in your panties. red lace with little bows.
the rest of your clothes are scattered on the floor, your shirt draped over the armrest, your skirt crumpled beside it.
you try to piece the events of last night together, did you sleep together? ... you can't quite remember. you sit up slowly, your head pounding with the dull throb of a hangover.
jungkook's presence was no where to be found, the apartment was dead quiet. he left you here, naked and confused: what a dick.
you do your best to gather the clothes, slipping into them, you search for your phone, finding it next to the alcohol display. you take another look at the various bottles, now sober.
you shake your head at how easy you were yesterday, checking the time on your phone until your heart drops — the meeting. the meeting you could not afford to miss.
you let out a groan of frustration, fighting the zipper of your skirt, great- you were going to meet your new ceo looking and feeling like a mess.
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you step into the large building with your heart still pounding, why did the metro station have to be so far away from your job? running as fast as you can had been your only option.
you push through the glass doors of the conference room, instantly sitting down, you did not want the people to look even more then a second at the wrinkled skirt of yours.
the important man stands facing away from you, writing something down on a white board. he seemed pretty tall, confident posture.
and then he turns around.
your expression drops. it's him. it's the man from last night.
🍓 tag list — @chansloverr , @marimarvelfan , @bxcndd
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ilys00ga · 9 months ago
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𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝘂𝗻𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗲.
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➞ pair: yoongi x female reader.
➞ word count: 1k
➞ synopsis: "yoongi and reader making a meal together for yoongi's parents" with a little bit of a domestic twist.
➞ genre: established relationship, husband!yoongi, dad!yoongi, just fluffy fluff fluff, they cook together, dad!yoongi, nothing goes wrong, dad!yoongi, just pure happiness, they also call it tooth-rotting fluff lol, did I mention: DAD!YOONGI ???, they have a babygirl uwu <33
➞ A/N: first off, thank u anon for sending me this super cute prompt, I loved it and had sm fun writing it!! second, EID MUBARAK TO MY FELLOW MUSLIMS OUT THEREEE <3 this is my lil gift for yall on this eid. it wasn't supposed to be this long tbh, and I haven't written anything for over a month, so, sorry if this is kind of messy and all over the place??? im trying to get my sht together again. but I really liked the prompt and!!! had to write it!!!! kkk enjoy bbys <3
ps. any form of feedback is reallyyyy appreciated. I live for compliments :) !
★ MASTERLIST.
ᵎᵎ 𖦹彡⋆。˚・ ─ ・ ⋯ ・ ─ ⊹ ♡₊˚๑
It was one warm spring morning.
Yoongi was back from a long series of concerts just a couple of days ago. Grateful to be finally home with the two people that mean the absolute world to him. Your cat was purring on his chest as the two of you laid on the bed, enjoying the quiet of Saturday that had just begun, when his mother called to announce that, later that evening, she and his father would be coming over.
One thing led to another, and there you stood with your husband in the kitchen. One was chopping ingredients up by the stove, the other handling a mixer. Your two years old baby girl, Nara, was sitting in her high chair somewhere away from the oven and any other harmful thing. What used to be your favorite playlists playing ever so softly in the background as you fixed yourselves your favorite meals, together, was replaced with the mindless blabbering of your sweet baby girl instead, playing with the wooden spoon you had given her to play with some minutes before.
“Is this good?” Yoongi dipped the tip of his finger into the mixture he’s been working on, and carefully brought it up to your lips. You hummed in satisfaction as soon as the flavors hit your taste buds, a little bit taken aback at how he nailed your mother’s secret recipe only in the first try, “Great. You’re getting so good at this, Yoonie. I think you should take over kitchen duties very soon.”
He snorted, “If that means I’ll never have to do the laundry ever again, then sure.”
Feigning annoyance, you hissed at him, “You’re so lazy.”
“No one likes doing laundry, honey. Not even you.”
"You're so annoying."
Your daily bickering banters were disturbed by the sound of his phone ringing from the other room. He left to take the call, leaving you with your noisy little baby. The chef hat she had on her head–Yoongi's idea, by the way, along with the tiny apron she wore as well–was almost too big on her. It made her look a thousand times more adorable that you immediately started grinning and cooing when she looked up at you.
"And what about you chef? Are you having fun?"
She balled her fists up and raised them in the air, wiggling in her seat to let you know that she wanted to be picked up. Being the ever so whipped mom that you were, you scooped her up in your arms right away, and peppered kisses all over her chubby face. Her giggles seeped through your skin and locked into your bones, aching with a sickeningly utmost adoration.
“Mom said they’re almost here.” Said Yoongi upon entering the kitchen, putting his phone atop the table and smiling as soon as his eyes fell on the two of you—his girls.
“Are you being a good chef assistant, baby?” He cooed, kissing her cheek, then leaning in to leave a peck on your lips.
“She’s been blabbering her life off the whole time you were gone." you hummed.
“Mom is going to have a good time conversing with her this evening.”
“We’re almost done cooking now.” You reminded him, “Honey, check on the oven please.”
“Right.”
A wave of heat hit his face as soon as he opened the oven, but he smiled once he checked on the muffins, “they are done.”
When he took the tray out and swiftly put it on the counter, Nara erupted in a fit of loud blabber, flailing the arm that clutched on the wooden spoon in the air and almost smacking your face in the process.
It had your husband giggling, of course. He couldn’t help but join in and engage with her blather, how could he not when he got such an adorable chatterbox for a child? “Huh, Nini? The muffins are done! Yeah!”
He took her into his arms, allowing you to go check on the stewpot that was still boiling on the stove, before bringing her to have a look at the tray of the mouth watering muffins, and cheered, “look!”
Your heart, yet again, swooned, almost oozing out of your ribs with how tight your chest grew to be at the sound of your baby’s joyful squeals. She was all excited as her daddy showed her around the process of cooking the dinner for her grandparents.
Nara was having the time of her life. For some reason, she's always loved being in the kitchen. Yoongi once made a comment about her becoming a successful chef, which then turned into a long, heartwarming talk about your daughter and her future. The gentle smile Yoongi had on his face throughout that was one to die for, especially when he sulked about not wanting your babygirl to grow up. His pout was so intense, you ended up engulfing him in a bone crushing hug for almost half an hour.
It was moments like this one that you wished were pictures so you could cut them up and hide them. Somewhere deep inside your heart. Forever. That's how you often found yourself observing and admiring every single interaction your husband made with your baby, and that’s how you ended up listening attentively as he continued to talk so passionately and earnestly with her, while simultaneously attempting to work with his free arm to the best of his abilities.
She, at one point, got so ecstatic that she accidentally thrusted her arm forward and hit him in the face with that spoon. But he only turned to look at you with an affectionate smile.
Struggling through a fit of giggles, you slipped the wooden object from her grasp and gave her a big kiss; making sure to squish her doughy cheeks—a trait that she definitely got from her father, “No more hitting mama and papa for you!”
The little girl’s squeaks only got louder as she reached out with her arms towards you, addressing you with more words of her very own and special language.
“Family hug?” you asked, glancing at a grinning Yoongi.
“Family hug!” He wrapped his free arm around you, bringing your body closer so that Nara could get a hold of you as well, then added, “but let’s make it a short one or else my parents are going to come to a burnt dinner.”
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stellar-haikyuu · 7 days ago
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dependable ace ☆ ushijima wakatoshi x reader
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synopsis: when reader develops a fever after training camp ends, she quickly realizes why ushijima is a dependable ace—just in a different way. details: fluff, sickfic, ~1.3k words, f! reader, relationship leaning toward romantic. warnings: none, other than this isn't proofread lol. also what's with me putting my readers through sickness in my shiratorizawa fics...
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It was rather unfortunate that you developed a fever on the last day of the team’s training camp. 
With the inter-high tournament approaching rather quickly, you wondered if the stress and exhaustion from keeping up with the team had finally caught up to you. Then again, you didn’t exactly have the best immune system to begin with.
That morning, you were still fast asleep in your assigned room as everyone prepared to leave. Goshiki had knocked on your door, asking if you were alright. All you could do was hum weakly in response.
At some point, more voices started to appear from different directions. You assumed the coaches and the other members had come to check in on you, but their words just blurred together.
However, one voice cuts through the fog with startling clarity.
“She is not feeling well. What should we do?”
You force yourself to open your eyes. Multiple blinks later, Ushijima’s face finally comes into focus. For a moment, you wonder if it’s a fever dream—there’s something different about his usually stoic expression. It’s much…softer.
The chatter of the team fades into background noise as you focus on the team’s ace. Something about him just keeps you grounded in all the haze.
Your breath hitches when he suddenly makes eye contact with you and calls your name.
“Can you understand what I am saying? Would it be alright for me to carry you to the bus?”
Carry me?
You blink at him, nodding slowly. There’s not much you can do about it anyway—it feels like a hundred bricks are weighing your body down.
Someone gently peels your blanket away and Ushijima squats down in front of you.
“How should I carry her?” He looks at the rest of the team for help. Suggestions are thrown around, but in the end, everyone agrees that the best way is to ask you.
The thing is, you don’t know the answer to his question. 
You take a few deep breaths to think. As your eyes wander, you notice the sunlight slowly creeping across the room, nearly reaching your futon. Some of it shines on Ushijima, bathing him in an ethereal glow.
In your feverish delirium, you blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. “Doesn’t matter…I trust you.”
The world seems to stop as the words leave your mouth. His eyes widen a fraction before he nods once, resolute. “Alright.”
He slowly moves forward to pick you up, his movements careful. You try your best to be helpful, adjusting yourself when he slides one arm under your knees and the other under your back.
“Ah, bridal style.” You hear a snicker from somewhere. “Not bad, Wakatoshi-kun.”
As Ushijima pulls you securely to his chest, you feel the rumble of his voice. “Bridal style? Then…is this inappropriate?”
“No, no, that’s just what it’s called. Don’t worry, lots of people do it, not just married couples.”
“Ah. I see.”
You glance up at his face, taking in the solid line of his jaw and his calm, focused expression. For a fleeting moment, the thought of being Ushijima’s bride runs through your mind. How lucky his future wife would be…
The thought lingers longer than it should, but your imagination is cut short when Ushijima lifts you effortlessly. The sudden motion and slight shift in your orientation make your head spin, drawing a soft groan from your lips. Instinctively, your hands reach out to steady yourself.
Ushijima stiffens for a brief second, and you realize that your arms are wrapped around his neck.
Although you’re pretty sure your entire body is a furnace, you feel more heat rise to your face. Thankfully, no one comments on what you did.
“Her body temperature is very high. We should move fast so she can recover as soon as possible.” 
He directs the rest of the team, following a clear, continuous train of thought. You hear something about retrieving your belongings, checking for forgotten items, tidying up the room, things to buy at the convenience store, and lots more you can no longer process.
At some point, you nod off. It’s the absence of his deep voice that jolts you awake, just as he starts walking out of the room. 
You shift in his hold, braving another glance at his face. He notices and returns your gaze, but none of you say anything for a while.
(And well, it might be better not to, since he’s about to descend the staircase.)
It’s rare for someone to be carried by the Ushijima Wakatoshi, so you try to etch this memory in your mind forever. You focus on his strong arms and how they have not wavered once since he lifted you. 
When he reaches the parking lot, the cold morning breeze hits you. You involuntarily shiver, wishing you had worn your team jacket. 
“You are cold,” Ushijima comments. “Even though your body temperature is rather high.”
“Y-Yeah. That’s how a f-fever works,” you chuckle at his observation. You can’t help but pull yourself closer to him, arms tightening around his neck. “S-Sorry.”
“You do not need to apologize.” He continues walking and the bus quickly comes into view. A pang of disappointment hits when you realize that this moment with him will soon end.
As he brings you onto the bus, you tense at the temperature. A chill runs up your spine as you realize the air conditioning is at full blast. A shaky breath is all you can manage when Ushijima looks at you with…great concern.
“Tendou told me that cuddling increases body heat. Would that help you?”
You freeze, rendered absolutely speechless at his offer. “W-what?”
“He said that it makes a cold person feel better. Do you agree?”
You cannot bear another second dealing with your body’s baffling thermoregulation. On the other hand, you want to fulfill a selfish wish to keep him closer to you for as long as possible.
“Yes,” you respond with no hesitation, sucking in a breath.
Ushijima nods at your consent. As he takes the paired seat in front, he gently lays you down next to him. To your surprise, he takes off his team jacket and silently offers it to you.
The generous action nearly makes you swoon. You thank him softly with a promise to return it later.
Ushjima waits patiently until you finish putting his jacket on. As expected, it’s quite big, but you’re just grateful for the extra layer over your pajamas.
“How would you like to...” There’s a tinge of uncertainty in his voice that you’ve never heard before. You can’t help but grin at how endearing he is.
“Um…” You turn towards him, shifting a little closer. Initiating the contact is a lot more daunting than you thought. Slowly, you lift your legs to rest them over his thighs. Then, you lean into him and wrap your arms around his torso.
“Is this okay?” Your voice comes out a little breathless. “If it’s uncomfortable, I can-”
“I am fine with this.” Ushijima responds, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows. “Would you like me to do anything else?”
His earnest desire to make you feel better tugs at your heart. “You can wrap your arms around me too.”
Ushijima hesitates for a moment, unsure of where to place his arms. You guide him gently, adjusting until the two of you settle into a comfortable embrace.
You close your eyes, sighing in content as his warmth finally envelops you. Throwing caution to the wind, you rest your head on Ushijima’s broad chest. The steady rhythm of its rise and fall is relaxing. 
“I feel better,” you mutter.
“I am thankful that is so.”
Would Washijo-sensei kill you if he sees this? Whatever, you can always blame it on the fever.
As the seconds pass by, you start to hear the thumps of his heartbeat. The rate is a little rapid, but you suppose it’s because he just spent the past few minutes carrying you. It doesn’t matter though, it’s soothing either way.
Before falling into slumber, you hear him speak in a low voice. “Thank you for your trust in me.”
“Of course, Ushijima-san,” You whisper in response. “You really are the dependable ace.”
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masterlist
karasuno fic event: stellar's stationery (ongoing)
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bahrtofane · 10 months ago
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here we go again - pt.1
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pt. 2 , pt.3
jude x fem!reader , trent x fem!reader
empty promise after another leaves you walking in the cold. alone. on valentines day. youre never speaking to another player again.
word count : 1K+
watch it : mild fluff, heavy on the angst, situationships, toxic relationships, Jude is kinda an ass in this one sorry, not very happy ending
happy valentines day LOL
—--
you and Jude have a complex history, complex relationship. 
you aren't officially together but at the same time you are exclusive. it's odd, but it's what works at the moment, (even if you wish he would just grow the balls to make you his already.)
you get he's a busy guy, top player both club and international. you aren't going to force him to choose you or make him get with you while his career is soon about to peak. 
your wishes for more soon fade into the background as he presses gentle kisses into your skin. he called you a few hours prior, wondering if you wanted to keep him company while he binges movies and orders you a pizza. you said yes, maybe a little foolishly. but it's hard to stay away from him. 
he's addicting. maybe it's a rush of being with someone whose whole existence is so grand. maybe it's the fact of knowing you have what millions of others crave for. you don't know, you try not to read into the intricacies. bad habit. 
so here you are, face pressed up against his chest while you lay side by side on this stupidly large couch, action movie playing, your pizza done, belly full and body warm. 
"what are you thinking about love?" he mumbles. 
"you." you shrug.
"me ?" he chuckles. 
you hum, wiggling deeper into the pile of blankets. 
"i've been thinking about you. and us." he confesses, almost shy. the movie playing in front of you has long fizzled out of your attention. 
hey might as well rip the band aid off. 
"me too," you hum, "why aren't we official again?"
you feel him sigh dramatically, "because my career."
you squint. there goes the same lousy explanation. "you could put more i don't know, thought into us."
he shifts under the blankets , "valentine's day is coming up. dont worry love i have it all planned out." he assures you. 
"oh yeah ?" you tease
"just you wait, the best valentine's day ever." he kisses the top of your head soundly.
—--
worst fucking valenties day of your life. you don't remember being more livid a day in your life. you cant remember the last time so much pure rage burned through you, hot enough to hurt. you didn't think it was humanly possible to clench your fist so tight youve dug into your palm hard enough to draw blood. 
your head hurts, your legs hurt, you think your arm is starting to bruise from where you were shoved into a table on "accident" but what would Jude know. he was so busy taking pictures with models and laughing at corny jokes while you kept yourself company. texting and calling didnt work and he didn't even try to give you any attention the whole night, you can't keep doing this with him. 
"you can't just run off-" Jude shouts from somewhere behind you. 
"or what Jude. or fucking what." you seeth, not bothering to face him, storming out into the night. 
It's your fault for trusting him all those nights ago. your fault for falling for the same shit over and over. 
he sprints to catch up to you, "i don't know why you're being like this."
you stop dead in your tracks, "oh i don't know, let's think. you didn't tell me your escorts would be there. and to top it all fucking off they have to nerve to be on my ass the whole night, not letting me get anywhere near you even through we walked in together?"
he doesn't respond and you half the mind not to punch the shit out of him, walking further away from the club you just came from, heels clanking against the sidewalk so hard it hurts, pulling on your dress so you dont trip and fall. maybe you should let it go so you can fall flat on your face. that would be a better ending to the night than seeing his face. silly stupid you thinking this would work. 
"happy fucking valentines day huh Jude. you take me to a damn club, you ignore me the whole night, and you spend all your time surrounded by other women who might as well just suck you off right then and there." you yell, hell if anyone hears. you want them too, you want him to be as humiliated as you feel. 
Bellinghams date thrown away the moment you step inside, ignored and tossed for some common whores. oh you can't wait to see where your face ends up online after tonight. you can see the headlines now. 
he grabs your arm, making you face him, "love listen-"
"no, you dont get to fucking do that anymore. you cant keep sweet talking your way out of things when you fuck up. why can't you just pretend to care" your voice shakes, you can feel tears brimming in your eyes.
"i'm not trying to talk my way out of it, i'm trying to explain." he tries.
you yank your arm out of his grip, "i'm not listening anymore, im done. all i asked was one day for us, just valentines day to make things work. and you showed me you dont care enough for that." 
"please, let me fix this." he pleads.
"its too late."
"i wanted things to work so fucking bad, and you humiliated me Jude. i imagined a nice dinner, hell i would have settled for take out and a few kisses. that's how bad i want things to work, that's how bad i wanted you." you tremble. 
"please my darling. let's talk about this. come back inside and i'll show everyone that you are mine," he holds a hand out to you, waiting. silently pleading with each breath he takes. 
the street lights dance across his skin as for a moment you almost believe him. for a moment you think about stepping back inside with him. you can't do that to yourself, not again. 
"no, iim done. don't follow me, don't call me dont text nothing. i want nothing more to do with you." your firm, final. swallowing the lump that builds in your throat, youd be damned if he sees you cry after this fucking shit show.
he stops in his tracks at this, not bothering to try and stop you. 
it hurts more than it should to leave him behind you, but you honest to god can not keep up with his lifestyle. 
all those articles and rumors were right you suppose, he's an arrogant stuck up bastard with too much money to know what to do with, too cocky for his own good and destroys anything good that comes his way. you hope he's happy without you. 
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wildemaven · 1 year ago
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he makes life better | joel miller
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-> pairing: no outbreak!joel miller x reader
-> word count: 1335
-> content warning: 18+ blog; bad day, annoyed with work, dealing with flat tire, joel being sweet, lots of fluff
-> note: this is for my sweet friend @gnpwdrnwhiskey hoping this brings a smile to her face 💞 this isn’t beta’d either so it’s probably filled with mistakes lol.
masterlist
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Joel ❤️: How’s your day going Honey?
I’m so ready for my shift to be over. I’d rather read the dictionary, front to back, than deal with the shit they have me doing today. 
RING
“That bad, huh?” Joel’s voice brings you an instant smile when you answer his call, silently stepping away from the mess that you were dealing with at work. 
“You have no idea. It already feels like it’s been the longest week, today has just added to the shit show life keeps throwin’ at me lately. Went to leave for work this morning and I had a flat tire. Ugh! I’m sorry for complaining.” You vent to him, tucking yourself in a secluded corner. You were going against policy by taking a personal call while on the clock, but you didn’t care about company policy or the outcome of you were to get caught at the moment— Joel was your only focus right now. 
“Hey, none of that. Don’t apologize for being stressed. Why didn’t ya call me ‘bout your tire?” Joel asked. 
You know he would’ve dropped everything the minute did call him, which is also why you didn’t. He had been stressing over starting at a new job site, one of the biggest ones he had been hired for. The last thing you wanted was to add to his already busy day of things he had to deal with. 
“You’d already left for work and had that new job you’ve been talkin’ about. Didn’t wanna bother you with it. I called AAA and had them put the spare on for me so I could drop it off at the tire shop. Now, I’m unexpectedly the owner of 4 new tires.” 
“I don’t care how busy I am— you need something, you call me, no matter what. Got that, Honey?” 
“Got it, Joel. Thank you.” You smile into the phone at his concern for you, always finding ways to make you fall even deeper in love with him. 
“Good. Hey, I gotta go. Tommy looks like he’s about ready to break his back. I should probably go help him before he actually does and my insurance takes a hit. I’ll see ya tonight then, sweetheart?” 
“Yeah. I should be outta here in 3 hours.” The end to your long shift, almost over. 
“That sounds great! I love you, Honey. I’ll see ya later.” You can faintly hear Tommy cursing in the background. 
“Love you too, Joel.” You tell him before the line goes dead. Giving yourself a few minutes of quiet before heading back to join your team and the never ending line of customers. 
The rest of your shift goes by fairly quickly. Joel’s phone call must have been just the moral boost you needed to sprinkle a little bit of extra positivity into your day.
The minute the clock hit 5 pm, you wasted no time clocking out and logging out of your computer for the day. Deliberately bypassing your usual exit path to avoid any chatty coworkers, Joel and home your main focus of the rest of your day, you weren’t going to waste any time stuck in drawn out conversations. 
Your purse thrown over your shoulder, work apron crumpled in one hand and the other holding your empty tumbler that once held the warm delicious coffee you had hoped would sustain you through the day, now wishing it was filled with something a little stronger to help you unwind when you got home. 
It’s a struggle trying to juggle your things as you search for your keys, lost somewhere in the depths of your purse along with the rest of your life's necessities. You pause in the middle of an empty parking space near where your jeep is parked to give the search your full attention. After some thorough digging, you locate your keys and let out an exasperated sigh, one step closer to being home. 
Taking a step forward as you press the unlock button on your key, you look up to see an unexpected sight. A familiar truck in the parking spot next to yours, and the most handsome man leaning on it. He looks like he came straight from the job sight, too. His peppered grey hair disheveled, but his soft curls were still intact even after a long day. The sleeves of your favorite green flannel are rolled up over his flexed forearms that are crossed against his chest, the fabric stretched over his broad shoulders. 
The sight of him is enough to melt away any of the bullshit you had endured over the past week, a completely welcomed surprise. 
“What are you doing here?” You ask him, letting your feet carry you the rest of the way to him. 
“Heard you were havin’ a shitty day. Couldn’t let my lady end it on a bad note.” He croons, pushing himself off the side of his truck, opening his arms to you. 
You melt into him, your face nestled into his shoulder. His rugged scent of musky vanilla and natural pheromones is permanently infused into the fibers of his shirt, it’s your favorite thing ever. His strong arms wrap around you as he presses a soft kiss to your temple, prompting you to straighten up, looking into his amber eyes. 
“Hi, Cowboy.” You beam at him. 
“Hi.” He says, leaning in to gently mold his lips over yours. “I’ve got a surprise for ya, Honey.” 
“This was enough of a surprise for me. What more could I need?” Stealing another kiss from him. 
“If I tell ya, it won’t be a surprise then, will it?” He says, tilting his head slightly as he looks at you. 
“I guess you have a point.” 
“We’ve gotta get going though, it’s time sensitive.” He grabs for your things and walks you around to the passenger door, holding it open as you climb in. “We’ll grab your jeep in the mornin’, if that’s okay with you?” 
“Whatever you say, Cowboy.” He leans back in for another kiss, before making his way around into the driver’s seat. 
*
The drive isn’t long. Down some familiar roads that lead to a dirt one off the main highway. His truck travels down the gravel road lined with a barbed wire fence. After a few minutes he’s pulling off to the side and killing the engine. 
“You brought me to my favorite place.” Looking over to his side of the truck, where he’s already looking in your direction. Your heart grows at how he thought to bring you here, knowing how much joy it brings you every time. 
“Thought you could use it. Look, here they come.” He says pointing to your window. 
Off in the distance, the small herd of cows were in pursuit of their evening meal and water break. Mamas with their little rambunctious calves trailing behind, trekking along the same path they travel each evening. 
It’s a calming sight. Their heads bobbling with each dramatic step. Tails whipping over their rear ends to swat away the annoying flies. A few stopping mid trek to look in your direction, letting out a long drawn out moo. Their friendly hello, it’s good to see you again, then back on the move. 
The sky is painted in pinks and purples as the sun dips below the horizon. Your day feeling less shitty as you sit silently in the cab of Joel’s truck. His hand resting on your thigh while his thumb draws soft circles over thick denim seam. 
“Thank you for this. Didn’t realize how much I needed it. I love you, Joel.” You tell him, rolling your head over the headrest in his direction. 
“I did it because I love you, Honey. And s’what I’m here for.” There’s a low rumble in the air as he turns the key over, shifting the truck into drive. “Now, how ‘bouts we head on home and I spend the rest of the evenin’ show you all the other ways I love you?”
“Take me home, Cowboy.” 
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gh0stsp1d3r · 8 months ago
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ℳ𝒶𝓎𝒷𝒶𝓃𝓀𝓈 𝓈𝒾𝓈𝓉ℯ𝓇
Chapter 6- just like your father
Series masterlist
Warnings- once again not too much rafe): I’m trying to get more rafe in the next parts, the readers drunk the whole time basically lol
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“Now a live update from the sheriffs department.”
“Yeah, after six weeks, the five teens that had been missing from Kildare county have returned, been reunited with their families.” Rafe went closer to the tv, sitting down and staring out. “We’re still waiting for details about their journey. But I’m sure they have quite a tale to tell.”
“We also got word that the father of one of the teens, John B Routledge, who’s been presumed dead for a year now, has also returned live and well. Wonders never cease. Right now, we’re just trying to get those kids settled back into school, with their families. They’ve been through a lot.”
“The teens were down in Kildare island with two other Kildare teens, Sarah Cameron and Y/N Maybank.” The sheriff spoke.
Rafes eyes widened at the mention of you and his sister.
“Sarah’s the daughter of disgraced real estate magnate, Ward Cameron, who confessed to the murder of Peterkin two months ago. y/n is the daughter of Luke Maybank, who is also presumed missing after escaping prison.”
Rafe watched as both of your pictures were put on screen, he recognized yours to be one of you you posted to your instagram, you at the beach. He was in the background, he noticed upon looking closer. Then, a picture of your brother, you and your dad.
You looked at the tv screen, scoffing at the picture they put up when they said your dad’s name. A picture of you, JJ and your dad. It was JJ’s first day of school, you remember that day as if it was your own first day of school.
You gripped the can harder, heavily sighing and leaning back in the chair. Yeah, you’d need more than one drink today.
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“When I was there, Rafe was talking about how the cross was his. Not- not Ward’s.” You told them all, hiccuping after and covering your mouth.
“Are you- are you seriously drunk right now?” Pope asked, all of them noticing the way you slurred your words.
“Fuck off. I’m an adult. Can do whatever I want.” You said with a childish giggle.
“It’s like 10 am in the morning.”
“Yo!” Kiara sapped her fingers. “Can we please get back on the topic?”
“Right. And he’s coming into Wilmington tonight at eight. It’s being shipped by train from like… R.. Ra… Raleigh I think? I dunno.”
“You get any other information?” Pope asked.
“Uh, y/n got the cargo number.” Kiara spoke, picking up the paper.
“Okay, well, that’s a start.”
“I mean, they’re definitely fencing that shit off as we speak. So we should probably get a move on.” JJ said, watching you down the rest of the can, and grab a 4th one next to you from your spot on the floor.
“Sarah, you hear from John B?”
“No, I mean, he’s probably off somewhere with his dad. But the problem is they have the Twinkie.”
“Our transportation.”
“I have a car, you know? It’s a hunk of shit, but it works.” You shrugged.
All of them raised their eyebrows at that. “It’s back at Ricky’s. I should probably go talk to him anyways.”
They all were hesitant, you could tell.
“I’m- I’m your only fuckin’ option, so, my car or nothing.”
“She’s right.” JJ told them, already hopping on his bike.
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“Ricky?” You shouted when you opened the door. He wasn’t home, you sighed, taking the keys off the counter and stumbling back outside.
“He not home?” JJ asked, furrowing his eyebrows.
“Nope.” You told him, locking the door. You go into the car, trying to get it started. But it never turns on, you groan in annoyance, fumbling with the keys, and trying again.
“Goddamnit!” You laughed, slamming your fist onto the dashboard and going out.
“It’s… not working.”
“Not working? What’s wrong with it?”
“I don’t know! It’s not fucking starting.” You shrugged.
JJ threw his hands up in defeat.
“Alright. That’s okay. We can.. try my dads.” Pope said.
“And I’ll try to see if my parents will.” Kiara spoke.
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You ended up going with JJ and Kiara to her parents.
“Jesus, Cleo was not wrong. It does look like the White House.” You mumbled when you entered. You drunkenly stumbled up the steps, JJ rolling his eyes and eventually just helping you up once you almost fell.
“We just found out it’s… it’s gonna be in Wilmington tonight.”
“Okay, and the cross is Popes family-“
“Popes family heirloom.” Kiara finished.
“Shit, this house is nice. Think we could just…?” You told JJ, grabbing an expensive bracelet sitting on the counter and pocketing it.
An idea popped into his head when you did that. If they don’t wanna give them the keys, he can take them.
“He’s alive!” Kiara argued. “JJ.” She turned, the cutlery clanking as he put it away guiltily, getting caught messing with it.
“Do rich people really need to use like… fancy everything? Like fancy plates? Is that necessary?” You mumbled, mostly to yourself as you took another sip.
“A little help?”
He put his hand up, counting off his fingers.
“Wards alive in the Carribean. He’s living off the loot he stole from us, and, uh, yeah, he’s flying across to Wilmington.”
“I was-“ you covered your mouth when you hiccuped again. “With them during the whole thingie. Basically I fell into the water…” you imitated water splashing with your hands.
“And it was like ‘ahhh! Now I’m stuck with my ex boyfriend who’s also crazy on an island, ahh!’ And then we went to some vacation home he has, and I saw Ward and he was like ‘sup, y/n. I’m alive.’ And that’s what happened.” You nodded to yourself, all of them staring at you dumbfounded.
“Give me a break, man.” Kiara’s dad spoke.
“Yeah, you’re right. What do I know? Just saw it with my own two eyes.” You shrugged, rolling your eyes and taking another sip from the bottle. “So did Kiara and JJ but, whatever.”
“I’m skeptical, okay? I am skeptical, y/n as in I think it’s all bullshit. And I think you’ve been led astray, Kiara. And you, JJ, Y/N- let’s get this out in the open.”
“Just take it down a bit-“ her mom tried.
“No. Let me tell you something, you need to understand that I do get it.”
“Sure you do.” You and JJ said in unison, you both laughing at that.
“Do you hear me?”
“Sure. Sure.”
“I like you, guys, and I bet you’re fricking fun to hang with, and to ditch school with, go down to the break, and.. drink beer,” he directed that last sentence to you, eyeing the can in your hand.
“because I was once just like you both. I didn’t think that anything mattered, thought I could make up any bullshit story and these stupid kooks would believe it. But then I learned about hard work.”
“Yeah, well, hard work doesn’t get you shit if you’re like us. I mean- shit, compared to me, you have no clue what hard work is like.” You spat, pointing to yourself. He was getting to close to JJ for your comfort.
He narrowed his eyes at you. “And about what really mattered. All I care about, all that I care about is my daughter. That’s it. And all I know is that she was a lot better off before she met you and your friends.” He said, this sentence directed to JJ.
“Dad, I was never better off!” Kiara argued, you looked at JJ, shaking your head when you saw his reaction. You were gonna kill this guy.
“I was miserable.”
“Miserable? No, no. No!” He shouted, turning to you and JJ.
“No, these pogues have ruined my daughter’s life.” He shouted in your face, you stood in front of JJ, trying your best to protect him.
“Didn’t mean any disrespect, Mr. Carrera.” You told him, turning to usher JJ out.
“Y’all have a good day.” JJ spoke, both of you heading to the door.
“Yeah.”
“What are you doing?” Kiara asked.
“Protecting my daughter.”
“Can we please-“
“Wait a second. Everybody says it, they are liars and thief’s!” Her dad shouted.
You and JJ stopped in your tracks.
“They’re just like their father! I mean, one of them is already drunk off their ass!”
The two words neither of you wanted to hear.
You looked at JJ, who held back tears at the words. You held your own back, throwing the rest of the can, looking at it pour onto the hardwood floor.
You grabbed the keys from the tray, you looked around again, shrugging before grabbing a jacket on the coat hanger, as well as some shoes.
“Wanna talk shit, you’re gonna get bit, right?” You mumbled to yourself, shrugging and following JJ down the steps.
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“Is she.. talking with Topper?” Pope asked, all of them turning to you and Topper at the bar.
“He didn’t want me to say anything, but he’s a fucking mess.” Topper said with a laugh, you laughed with him.
“Yeah, well, he was an asshole. So…” you said, taking the shot you ordered.
“Believe me, I know.” He told you,
“Hey, Jayj.”
“What?”
“I bet you Topper has a way to transport the cross.” Pope spoke.
“Actually, Popes right. He does have a rig.”
“No.” Sarah argued.
“Yes.”
“Yes, come on.”
“No, absolutely not.”
“What are we talking about?” You asked them, coming up behind them suddenly.
“Sarah, you already got him whipped anyway, right? So why don’t you just take one for the team?”
“What would John B say?” She said.
“I think John B will completely understand. Think about the circumstances, it’s about treasure.”
“We can handle John B. Just talk to him.”
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“Why do I feel like I’m gonna regret this?” Topper spoke, all of you happy when you saw her hug him.
You ended up falling asleep on the boat. Your eyes shut as they all came up with plans.
You can’t even escape him in your dreams. Because when you fell asleep, a fond memory of the two of you popped up in your mind.
“Shit, slow down.” He laughed, grabbing onto your hand as you ran down, pushing past people and making your way down straight to the floor.
“Can’t believe I let you drag me into this shit.” He said with a laugh when the band came on stage and cheers erupted.
He watched you while you paid close attention to the band. And when your guys song came on, he was told to sing with you, he hesitated but eventually did.
“Got the music in you, baby. Tell me why. You've been locked in here forever. And you just can't say goodbye. Your lips, my lips. Apocalypse.”
You both sung to each other, you staring at him with the most love and adoration he’s ever seen, and him staring at you with the most love anyone’s ever seen him have.
You both leaned in, but before your lips connected…
You woke up, quickly sitting up and groaning, wiping the sleep from your eyes.
“Jesus. Think I drunk too much earlier. I’m going crazy.” You told them, all of them turning to look at you now.
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Taglist
@cassie0sstuff @rafesgiirl @fals3-g0d @tiaamberxx @callsignwidow @saintnourah
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abyssalaquarist00 · 19 days ago
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hiiiii im rly enjoying ur occultist posting :3 i have a wuastion that it seems you might be in a position to answer: does it make sense in your opinion for him to be wearing a turban or is that just orientalism? and/or do you have a headcanon for him related to that? from what i understand it rly isn't that common for arab muslim men to be wearing them at all times, and while the characters' backgrounds/worldbuilding is ofc v vague, it kinda seems to me like they just went off a bunch of stereotypes without bothering to put further thought into it and that's why he's designed to be wearing one but if there's a way to adopt that design into sth that makes sense and deepens his character a little bit i wanna hear it :3
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i finally get to talk about this
thank you for the question!
the turban style is less common today but it WAS a popular style in the middle ages. its believed to have originated in mesopotamia give or take 4000 years ago.
Golden Middle Age has a good video on this! we also have some examples in historical art (check out ibn sinna, the islamic golden age and also like almost every ottoman ruler)
i personally theorize that lovecraft's abdul al-hazred was inspired by ahmed al-buni (author of shams al-ma'arif/"knowledge of the sun") and other golden age scholars considering that al-hazred canonically lived sometime during that era. i like Lets Talk Religion's video on shams al-ma'arfi.
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here are some of my headcanons for DD al-hazred and how he might wear his kufiyeh. while lovecraft's al-hazred is yemeni, i headcanon DD al-hazred to be from like. a fantasy al-andalus (with fantasy yemeni and syrian ancestry). (ive kind of always seen the DD world as Not earth)
so, for history's sake it's accurate headgear! there's many ways to wear a kufiyeh, and nowadays the turban is less popular among arabs but i think thats really recent and it could be dependent on the amnt of industrialization.
here's a photo of the omani sultan's family in the 1950s
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(source, this site contains historical pictures of oman and includes pictures of prisoners and slaves. worth noting for educational and informative purposes, proceed at will)
i do have some things about the rest of his fit, that i mostly chalk up to the fact he went to school in fantasy england but still prefers to wear a robe and kufiyeh (i can relate except not the england part). the things that i can say are Really Delightful for me to see personally
the dagger
the waist wrap
robes
leather braces (im not sure if this is an arab thing to be honest. i think this might be a goth thing for me)
BUT i do have some critiques also
waist wrap should be UNDER the robes, over the tunic
that tunic also looks weird to me wrt that cordage. thats kinda giving me orientalism
the necklace??????
no opinions on the pants or the shoes. again chalking up some of the design choices to him adopting things from his time in fantasy england + i think he's fairly well traveled. im sure he has a sirwal and a pair of these bad boys that he will Not be wearing into the dungeon
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i wouldnt want him to be wearing these in the dungeon either but they get an honorable mention because this evolved into a historical/cultural fashion post.
i like his DD1 design!
now DD2 on the otherhand..........
idk whats happening there, thats a whole different story. he shouldnt be an egg imo. i kind of dislike his dd2 design LOL. but he's otherwise a pretty solid design even with the critiques i have.
on topic of kufiyehs, i like kufiyehs that are tassled bc theyre so fun and fashionable. that's a personal preference and i have drawn him that way before (its somewhere on my blog)
i have the nablus kufiyeh from hirbawi and it's my favorite.
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i hope this covers everything!
i'll be happy to answer any more questions if you have any :-)
also some research tips if you're curious to look more into it:
i highly recommend looking up archival / antique photos of different countries to get a sense of what that particular culture's fashion looks like. these countries also often have museum pages or heritage websites available in english (machine translate is also an option)
i would avoid french and british art. you can actually filter by place and time on most digital collections like the met, the british museum, or university of chicago (UC doesnt get specific though rifp)
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lalasworld2x · 6 months ago
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Brahms x Reader Headcanons
This takes place after you find out he’s a grown man lol (but you don’t kill him of course)
• There aren’t any romantic feelings at first just because you’re still interested in Malcom, but you can decide if you guys have a falling out or if you just lose interest lol.
• It might take a bit to convince him to do house chores as well, as he’s lived his whole life in the walls and just has the mindset of “people have always done it for me, why stop now??”
• If you ever get mad at him, he’d probably try and finish all the house tasks before you get a chance to just so there’s now a reason for you to not be mad at him.
• He still likes to stay in the walls quite often, like a safe space for him.
• At the start, he used to get really overwhelmed by being out for so long, so you’d sit and comfort him for as long as possible. This just made him fall for you harder.
• He loves to cuddle in bed. He’s been touch starved so long, he just wants a warm bed and a warm embrace for hours on end ☹️💔
• Sometimes the closeness is never enough for him, like he just needs to be as close to you as possible. It’s not enough until he is literally molding into you, like angler fish lmao. If this makes you uncomfortable, he will back off but it will be a bit hard for him.
• He can definitely be demanding and sometimes very selfish, you may unfortunately have to still treat him like a child. I bet naughty corners would still work tbh… make sure you set clear boundaries and speak up for yourself.
• Although it’s definitely understandable if you were afraid to stand up for yourself, we already know he’s willing to hurt you and those that you love just to make sure you’d stick around.. I’m not gonna lie, it would actually probably be helpful to learn at least a bit of self defence in case he ever does try to put his hands on you. I’m sure even being strong enough to hold him in a head lock would scare him enough to back off and respect you more.
• This man does not gaf about body types or anything, he loves em all! Lean, muscular, chunky, curvy, slender, average- anything and he loves it!! He just wants someone to take care of him
• His immune system would probably be on the border of decent and not very good. He’s lived his life in the walls which is certainly not clean and nurturing space, but he also hasn’t really gotten out enough to get sick or hurt himself. Obviously he had a life before being forced into hiding, but he did spend like a decade tucked away. Would probably help you to get him vaccinated lol. ANYWAYS my point is, he might get sick fairly often, especially if you do actually start bringing friends and family over and you get to have an actual job. He would LOVE to have you coddle him. Tuck him right into bed, make him hot soup, coo over him, etc.
• Just because you would hate to be stuck at home with him all day I’m sure, you set some boundaries and convince him that he will be okay if you apply for jobs or go out to get materials and such for your own job if you work from home. And you should absolutely have the right to bring friends and family over now that he’s no longer a doll. This might upset him for a while, but you both come up with ways to make this arrangement comfortable for you.
• He compliments you all the time. You makeup, outfit, hair, posture, ideas, expression, the way you look when stretching or exercising, your interests- anything and everything!
• He will make small crafts for you as gift, mostly paper. He may even learn some origami for you with a book he found. He’s a bit shy when gift giving so he’ll leave it in a spot he knows you will find it and go somewhere else to hide and watch your reaction.
• He might be a bit shy to try new foods, but if he knows that you really enjoy them, it might encourage him a bit. He would love to indulge in your own culture more, so he would be less timid about trying traditional foods from your cultural background!
———————-
I know this one is kinda shit, I was struggling to think of things that I haven’t already seen other creators write before and I did NOT want to steal peoples ideas 😭😭
Masterlist
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damiansgoodgirll · 1 year ago
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just something cute for jude bellingham because i saw a video on tiktok and i imagined what his reaction would have been lol
jude bellingham x reader
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honey, it’s july
“last christmas i gave you my heart…” jude heard singing from the living room. he knew you had a huge love for christmas time but he couldn’t understand how you were so obsessed with christmas since it was only july.
he loved summertime.
the hot weather, ice creams, beaches, cool places like ibiza and greece, the formula 1. he was the happiest person during summertime.
you were the complete opposite.
hated the warm weather, preferred mountains over water, you would live in alaska if it was for you. the only positive thing about summer were the ice creams that you loved.
you got immediately onto christmas spirits the moment you saw a page on tiktok showing the countdown till christmas and you honestly couldn’t believe that in only 5 months it was going to be the best part of the year once again.
you were currently scrolling through instagram but you couldn’t help yourself when you put the christmas playlist and the wham singing in background.
you hummed to the song “quietly” but not so quietly, because you were sure that jude heard you.
“babe…” you heard him calling you from behind “why is the christmas playlist on? it’s only july…” he asked you with a very oblivious look on his face.
“who cares?” you asked.
“you should put on j balvin, bad bunny…i don’t know, calvin harris, something a little bit more summerish…not mariah carey or the wham” he laughed.
“you’re such a grinch…” you smirked at him.
“i know i know, now can you please change the playlist?” he asked you with his doe eyes, thinking you would fall into his trap.
you nodded and changed mariah carey to ariana grande’s last christmas.
“honey, it’s july” he said exhausted but amused by your loving christmas spirit.
“it’s snowing somewhere!” you half screamed and jude bursted out laughing.
“if you’re like this now i’m probably scared of how you’re gonna be in december…” he joked.
“december? no no, it’s christmas on november 1st!” you said. this was going to be your first christmas together as a couple and he had no idea what it was going to be like with you.
“oh god…i’m honestly worried” he joked again.
“ well, you should be happy because i make the best hot chocolate and the best christmas cookies ever! you’ll thank me, trust me”
“we’ll see, we’ll see” he said smiling at you while he gently picked you up and put you in his lap.
little did he know that you already started buy presents and decorations for the house.
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vashtijoy · 11 months ago
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Hi! Pre-emptive sorry for the long ask- I don't know if you've answered this before but I was scrolling through your blog and in one of your posts you note that the brief bit we see of Akira's hometown has high rise buildings, which implies it's a city. I could've sworn there was in game dialogue calling him a country boy though or referencing him being from a rural area? Is there something in the Japanese text to suggest these are meant to be taken as jokes (I.E. protag is from a city, but it's not as big as Tokyo so he's playfully considered 'rural') or is this a case of the game devs simply not considering what buildings they had in the background of that scene?
Hello! First of all, I think it's insanely unlikely that the game devs just forgot Joker was meant to be from a shack on top of a mountain and accidentally put him in a city. Maybe they didn't have time to design a farm and shoved him in a random cityscape instead? Well, maybe. I would at least have pasted in a couple more trees.
So what do we know about this?
Sojiro calls Joker 田舎もん inakamon, short for 田舎者 inakamono—someone from the countryside; someone provincial. This is what's translated as "country boy", or "country bumpkin". Chihaya uses it about herself, and Chihaya I think is certainly meant to be very rural. The Adorable Woman and Rural Young Man in Shibuya Station use inaka a lot:
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His name did not originally use inakamono or similar, by the way—he's the 上京してきた青年 joukyou shite kita seinen, "the young man who's moved to Tokyo". Note the moving-up kanji there, 上, lol—this is not a sideways move, it's a definite move up.
so what is the inaka?
In short, the inaka can be the remote countryside—but it can also just be your hometown, of any description. It can be legit anywhere that isn't Tokyo. Here's Tofugu:
My mouth was hanging open and I know I was being rude, but it was really hard to pull myself together. The woman I was speaking with was from one of the top Japanese Universities. She has had international relationships, traveled the world, and done work that most foreign anime fans would kill to see. Someone with her experiences, to me, should be open-minded about other cultures and lifestyles. Just the same, I can't help but to be bothered by what she said: "I feel like anything outside Tokyo's 23 wards is inaka." [...] Often, people usually just use what they read in the dictionary, but I learned fast that "countryside" in American English is much different than in Japanese English. For me, countryside means farms. Countryside is driving to see your closest neighbor, riding tractors for work and pleasure, and being able to immediately tell who's from your town just by looking at them. When I say this to Japanese people and ask them to explain inaka, the joke is always the same: "Inaka is anything outside of Tokyo." Osaka and Kyoto, for many, aren't inaka, but Sapporo, which is one of the few parts of the country where this legendary thing called "insulated housing" exists, is inaka. [...] So you might be wondering how "bad" it really is out here. Truthfully, I'm living in a city, at least by American standards. Great bus and train systems, tons of malls and movie theaters, some of the major stores people visit Tokyo to see, game centers, golfing… and a few rice paddies. Not many, but there are some. Imagine a fashionable mall, famous manga store, well-respected school with a strong baseball team, and major supermarket, all within walking distance, with maybe one field of rice. Honestly, the place is so city that I don't think I would willingly eat any rice that grew in that field. I swear, it's in front of a bus stop.
So, tl;dr: if you aren't in Tokyo, Osaka or Kyoto, you're probably in the inaka—at least to someone's mind. You can be somewhere that looks to us in every way like a city, and be in the inaka. And if you pick up sticks and move to Tokyo? Then you have a good chance of being jibed about being a "country boy".
so what is joker's inaka like?
[Joker] 田舎に帰りたい inaka ni kaeritai I miss the country... [lit. I want to go back to the inaka.] Ryuji ハハ、都会の洗礼ってか? haha, tokai no senrei tte ka? Hah. Not used to the big city yet, huh? [lit. Haha, so this is your first time in the city?]
We don't get a huge amount of detail in-game about Joker's home. Besides Sojiro's "country boy", Ryuji has a couple of comments. Here's another:
Ryuji あれ? お前ン家ってわりと田舎? are? omae n uchi tte wari to inaka? Wait a sec, your hometown isn't near the countryside, is it? [lit. isn't your place relatively countrified?] Ryuji いや、大自然でランニング練習とか気持ち良さそうだなーって。 iya, daishizen de ranningu renshuu to ka kimochi yasasou da naa tte I was just thinkin' it'd be great to run an' train somewhere out where it's all big, naturey open space. [lit. no, I thought it seemed like it'd feel great to train in the great outdoors and stuff.]
(I think something may be off here with that translation of daishizen, which seems to connote "the great outdoors", "a vast wilderness", etc, as well as just meaning "nature" (the sort you get out into) more generally". The word has been split up as if Ryuji was just saying "big nature" for some reason, like if you thought "the great outdoors" meant "the outdoors is great :D".)
But we can see from Ryuji's statement that Joker's home is wari to inaka, "relatively countrified", "kind of countrified"—it's more the country than Tokyo is, but it's probably not the ass end of nowhere, either. It's somewhere Ryuji pictures getting out into nature—but even if that's accurate and not just in Ryuji's city-boy head, that again doesn't connote "ass end of nowhere"; a lot of very built-up places are startlingly close to farmland or to nature, as with the putative rice field at the bus stop that we read about earlier.
the artbook picture
There is, of course, a picture of Joker's home in the artbook:
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That doesn't scream "rural" to me—though it's also not the built-up area we see him in with Shido. It backs onto a cliff, it's very green. It's clearly a row of houses on a street, maybe in a fancy suburb on the edge of the city?
It's a nice house, at any rate. Joker moving into Sojiro's attic, with his clothes in a box, will have been a harsh step down.
Another detail from this image before we move on:
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Look at this board. We can make out what it says. We can even, just possibly, make out a town name there...
日立自治会 掲示板 hitachi jichikai keijiban Hitachi Neighbourhood Association noticeboard
自治会 jichikai—neighbourhood associations. As you'd expect, they tend to be organised at the very local level—so Hitachi is likely to be a small district within a larger city, rather than (say) the city of Hitachi in Ibaraki Prefecture.
his city has a name guys i can't believe it lmao
the coup de grace
But there's one question I think really puts the nail in the coffin here: WTF was Shido doing in the middle of nowhere?
It's totally plausible that Joker came from a remote farm in the country, or a tiny village in far northern Honshu. But what is there in that to attract Shido? Like... Shido seems kind of an indoor guy, y'know?
He goes where his business is. He goes where the money is. It's difficult for me to picture him going to random rural areas with nobody to schmooze, with what I'm sure he'd consider to be poor facilities and shitty hotels.
Even if he did stoop to visit somewhere like that, by the time he was on his off hours getting pissed (in both senses) and attacking women, wouldn't he have gone back to civilisation?—back to the city?
conclusion??
This place Joker is wandering after dark doesn't look like The Country. It looks quite built up. I'd say it's the centre of a regional city or large town—with those nice houses we just looked at set off in suburbs along its edge. Look at this place:
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It really does look like a less cramped version of Yongen-jaya, down to the trees. I don't think they spent too long on this area, but I also don't think it's inaccurate.
By the way, that "Hometown Neighbourhood" was originally 実家近くの住宅地 jikka chikaku no juutakuchi—"residential area near home". So this is not where Joker lived with his parents; it's an area close by. Like he says, he's on his way home late.
Where was he? We never find out. He has what looks like a school bag, well before his nasty crime days. Maybe he was visiting a friend we never hear about again. Maybe he was at cram school. But he's gone to this built-up part of town to do something there.
My guess would be that he lived in some prefectural capital or other. That's why Shido is there. I'd also guess that it's one of the Kanto prefectures, since the further you go from Tokyo, the less likely it becomes that Joker would have been sent to Tokyo for his probation, whether Sojiro was a friend of a friend or not.
As ever, all of this is for information only, and if you want to do something else superior in every way, you definitely should. At the end of the day Joker's a silent protagonist player insert, who can be from absolutely anywhere and as gay as you like. Let a thousand Jokers bloom.
revision history
Click here for the latest version.
v1.0 (2024/01/17)—first posted.
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13thdoodle · 1 year ago
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[ ECTOBERHAUNT 2023 BANNER ]
I'm doing the banner for this year's @ectoberhaunt event~ The theme is Science vs Magic
I had so much fun making this~ Sam get the fantasy AU fit while Tucker gets Cyber/futuristic style
Sketch Progress
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I like the idea of Sam being a druid bc nature connection tm
And Tucker would vibe very well with fancy future stuffs. i was gonna draw him with a bigger puffer but I couldn't figured it out. I like the one we got here too so yay
Okay so I was a bit pressed on time while working on this so I couldn't do as much research and references as I should.
On Sam's part, the somewhat floating book was inspired on how genshin impact's catalysts have their books/weapon just floats and it looks fancy n magical n Sam deserve that honestly
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Her glowing tattoo are highkey inspired of this beautiful Sam with tattoos art by @the-stove-is-on-fire Mine is nowhere close to that but that's my main inspiration for this
I was gonna give Tucker his usual orange sweater but I noticed a lot of neon or cyberpunk outfit relies on dark backdrop to pop.
And since the background color is gonna be bright yellow, I gotta put the dark color somewhere else. And his sweater would be the perfect spot to balance out all the brightness with a bit of darkness
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And it matches with Sam too so it works out great uwu
The magic circles on their back were mostly there to balance out the composition bc it looks too empty as is, gotta spice it up a lil bit uwu But a direct halo would look.. too out there? I mean I can but like.. Sam is magic/fantasy based, why not lean on that n go for magic circles :D
Tucker's random bits on the background took the most out of me bc like.. its hard qwq I literally try to look up aesthetic bg to figure out how to work with his?? Eventually I just settle on less is more and added shadow under the bits to make em pops out against the orange
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source
And for the color choices, I wanted the two of them to have purple, yellow, and green on them. The green color on to symbolize Danny bc I'm an Everlasting Trio shipper lmao
I wanted Sam to have some yellow and green on her magic, which kinda.. got covered with the whites honestly. But the greens stays with the vines so we'll go with that Tucker was harder to figure out, so I settle with him with blue and greens instead of purple qwq
In the end, only the green end up staying lmao It ends up unifying both sides so hell yea it all works out lol
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frozenjokes · 4 months ago
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Cake (Sir Chloe) // Animatic Script
been thinking about this for a while allow me to indulge in the thing I’ll never make
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*small note, everyone but Scar and Cleo are ghosts, and do not bleed (except Cub)
Eyes on your neck
Camera pans down on Scar, quite a bit worse for wear. His arms are bound behind his back and if his legs are in frame, they are also bound and he is sitting awkwardly, face stony
I should put you down like a sick dog
Pan up to Cub, looking down on Scar. He speaks the lyrics with some conviction, but they both know this ain’t happening. The key to Scar’s binds is strung around his neck
Look at yourself
The scene shifts, background distorted and tinted pink or orange. Cub’s conviction is gone, but he’s confused, not afraid. He looks at the camera (to Scar), but his eyes don’t quite focus.
Thinking you deserve / what you don't got
Back to Scar, speaking smugly. He flexes his claws, no longer bound. / The focus is back on Cub. The distortion on the background fades slightly but not completely. It seems to occur to him something is wrong, that he made a mistake. (key gone lol) Just as he’s starting to turn to run, hard cut to the next line.
Craving
Pan out on a wide shot of Cub in Ren’s bedroom, Ren on the left at the doorway and Cub on the right in bed, jolting upright. His neck and back and cut to pieces, and blue blood is basically everywhere (he’s a bit of a leaky faucet)
I don't need / a reason for cake
Bust shot of Cub, looking up at something behind Ren. He says nothing. / Shot of Ren standing in the doorway. He cocks his head, maybe starts to say something before Scar comes out of nowhere, ripping through him. Ren’s form dissipates, but Scar isn’t looking at Ren.
The salivating
Side profile of Scar speaking, almost unhappily, but equally dazed.
It keeps me / awake
Front shot of Scar continuing to speak, possibly gesturing above himself to a crude image thought bubble of him and Cub running away to Cleo’s boat at the edge of the island. / Cub stares at him, mouth gaping just slightly. He closes it, looking some amount focuses or determined.
Just another ache, ache
Scar and Cub running together, hand in hand. The shot faces their backs, buildings of the shopping distinct rushing by. Cub pushes Scar suddenly out of the way and is hit by a potion that flies in from off screen. Zedaph floats into view, but doesn’t have time to react before Scar mauls him out of the air. It is animal-like.
I'll hit it off
Front shot of Scar picking Cub up and continuing on, stony.
with an open mouth
Cub notices through the daze of the weakness effect Doc, obscured by brush. He fails to warn Scar before he is dropped, a net from Doc’s gun taking Scar the fuck out
Talking the way / I want it
Doc scoops Cub off the ground, assuming him to be kidnapped. The effects of the potion are beginning to wear off. / Cub murders the fuck out of Doc, either with a dagger to his stomach or just uses his hands. He’s got claws for a reason (the reason is aesthetics but)
I'll hit it off with an open / mouth
In the swamp, Scar and Cub (foreground) stalk Cleo (background) where she’s standing guard by her boat on the muddy beach, speaking urgently into their walkie-talkie. Cub drifts into the edge of the clearing, about to attack, but some kind of clarity and/or pain strikes him. His neck leaks a little blood, thematically probably. He hesitates. / Bust shot of Cleo looking up and seeing him. She is not scared or surprised, facing him determinedly
Talking the way I want it
Cub lunges for an attack, slamming into Cleo’s large shield. Cleo deflects him again and again, he can not get past her despite his ferocity. (ghost skill issue. they’re a mother fucking pirate baybe)
*ending instrumental*
Scar comes out of the treeline, looking appropriately deranged and haggard. Somewhere he got a sword, which he probably shouldn’t have. Cleo raises their sword when they see him along with their shield. epic sword fight ensues. Despite having Cub on her back, she is kicking both of their asses, keeping up with Scar’s sword while holding Cub off with her shield, minimal injuries. Scar’s been starving to death for like a month and also a bit out of practice so he’s taking major Ls. Cleo knocks him clean off his feet and into the mud, turning around in time to meet Cub with her shield for the final time. But Cub finds the bottom of their shield, wrenching it up with both hands and sending Cleo tumbling backwards, right onto Scar’s arced sword.
Scar gets up, rolling a sufficiently stabbed through the stomach Cleo off of himself. He’s wearing that signature good times smirk and mighty pleased with himself. He ignores Cub completely as he walks toward the boat, not looking back. Cub looks almost lost, he doesn’t know what to do. He certainly doesn’t look happy about Cleo, that’s his friend :(
Cub is sitting on the boat while Scar readies them to set sail. (Background) Cleo, in the foreground, is lying face down in the mud. Cub is staring at Cleo as she stirs. He looks away. It’s clear he does so on purpose. Cleo pushes herself up with her arms, sword still sticking through her. (she’s a zombie lol) Cut to black as the music trills.
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bigdsgirl · 3 months ago
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Love Next Door Episode 12
look i had to watch sports and do chores (sigh), but I am HERE now. and i have THOUGHTS. because lovelies, we fucking MADE IT!!!!!!
these two dweebs, just kiss again. <3 with your banana milk <3
god these two are children i am cackling, they cannot admit what is happening!!!! lmfao!!!
seung-hyo is dying and i love it
not him offering her food. DEAD. I will not survive the episode.
and not her being like hey!!! only i get food offered by my man!!
WERE THERE ANY BUGS????? lol omfg.
the way they continue to revert back to their sassy selves each time they transition or deal with wild news 😭😭😭
"I've always been with you" BYE I AM DUST
not the going through their history through small touches. BYE.
okay now smooch. please for the love of god.
NO GIRL not the hair!!! KISS AGJLDGJAFGK
omg he is so happy with them cuddling <3 this man is over the moon.
i will be the using the shot of them on a bench as a background somewhere, mark my words. or it's going to be the center of a bullet journal spread because AHHH
omg mo-eum girl, rock the interview! you got this babe!
as a hiring manager at my work, girl you killlling it
oh hi mr. seung-hyo's dad! and other guy! are we about to brawl? kinda feels like it.
goodness that man is just... so fine. silver/grey hair is gorgeous.
this man is so confused lolw hat is happening
YEAH TELL HER YOU LOVE HER! AND HE CANNOT SWAY HER!
YEAH SHE IS SO PRETTY HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE HER???
HAHA OMFG HES GAY! GO OFF KING!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this. is. a. comedy. i. love. it.
well this changes everything and i love it <3 just two queens that are besties who work together <3
bahaha he's so embarrassed. i'm dying. the GROAN ma'am i love it
finally communicating, i love that. also she has a point! it's not her secret to tell! omg. and he's like "i married a baddie my god" and boy you are right.
omg "mom I'm an influencer now" omg she called it an influenza. I am using that now. ☠️
omg no not the blind date for seok-ryu
i have a feeling it will be the journalist and i will lose it
omfg his FACE when mom asked about the blind date. i will fucking die this is a comedy of the highest tier
cowards!!! you tell your biggest fan!!!
oh she knows. and a superfan would know! go off queen!
WE ADMITTED IT LETS GOO!!!
"I feel like my body and soul is refreshed and massaged" GIRL SPEAK ON IT!!!!!!!!!!!
not the flashbacks with everyone being like YOU ARE IN LOVE!!!!! and Mo-eum just in the background 😭🤭
Not her saying she's out of his league and that's why people never put seung-hyo and mo-eum together I LOVE HER
dear god if yeon-du is not her step daughter by the end of this show, I will be committing crimes of revenge. they are a FAMILY.
HELL YEAH MOM! Yeon-du should be her daughter!!!
ALERT! ALERT! GORGEOUS GREEN SHIRT ON HIM!!!!!!! I AM LOSING IT!!!!!!
he was built to be a dad, i luv him.
"arizona si, chicago no", what in the sam heck are these shirts, hilarious
he says look, i want to scream this from the rooftops that we are together. <3 and boy, I get it.
oh no girl. girl he is planning forever with you. oh no oh no.
oh girl, seok-ryu looks so cute in those PJs!!!
hahah oh girl you are going to regret saying what you said. he says no one can know? got it, 12 feet apart at all times.
oh girl what the fuck why you do that!!!!! that's his phone!!!!
I am glad he is standing up for himself. because i agree, her behavior is not appropriate at all!!!!!!!
movie! date! making out at the movies! lets go!
adventure day with the fam let's freaking do it!!!!!!
are we CAMPING???? YAY! I love a good camping trip!
oh they are such a good team <3 cute cute!
Mo-eum is such a cool cat, i love her
jfc they are such a family already!!! barbecue! water gun fights!
did this show just say trans rights? I am electing yes with the umbrella shot 😎
we love a trip sponsored by electric cars. fancy!
the 🤌yearning🤌
omg the water spot on the shirt hot him bothered! ope! omfg not the giving her his FLANNEL!!!!!!!
my girl looks so good for her movie date!!!! eep!! oh goodie, time for her..... to experience the "no one can know". lol he's working on architecture project, of course. omg everyone is cuddling except them!!!!!!!! WAHH NOOOOOO
what a gorgeous sunset for these gorgeous people. ugh she is the cutest lil kiddo. omg. wait. wait. is it time??? are we gonna.... ya know, talk about it??
WAIT CAT I SAW A CAT!!!!!
god she loves this girl so much, how can you not want her as her step mom?????
holy shit. holy. shit. she said it. SHE SAID IT.
i am stunned. what a beautiful confession. MO-EUM MY GIRL.
yeah let's cancel the agreement!!!! it wasn't a mistake!!!
NEVER???????????? SIR????? 😔
No no no no please, you three deserve happiness and its with each other! please!
god damn it. Now she's gonna take the job in antartica so he doesn't feel bad.
HAHAH the hand reaching. girl just GRAB IT!
LOL the "you go in first"
oh no not the doc visit.
OH THANK GOD ITS NOT ALZHEIMERS! YESS!!!!!!! GOD BLESS!!!!
Due to stress and anxiety??? well I hope that is the case.... I am not a fan of this. hmm hmm hmm.
LOL HES SO HAPPY!!! My lil baby <3 he's such a drama queen.
like father like son :)
oh girl. oh girl. I laugh because you did this to yourself. you asked him not to bring it up!
ope a family dinner oh my goodness. my girl Tae-hui stirring the pot like the queen she is
omg seung-hyo is so nervous and she is SO JEALOUS
these two are children omfg, just communicate
PARENTS OVERNIGHT TRIP????? SO THEY WILL HAVE THE HOUSE TO THEMSELVES???? LETS FREAKING! GO!
love the fanny back good sir
lol them arguing and seok-ryu dying, i feel the same
OH BROTHER IS LEAVING TOO????
oh we about to fuck. shit. up! let's go!!!!!!!!!
the parents being so silly and jealous of each other
oh he GOT THE LENS -- that lens is way too big but i love the enthusiasm lmfao - he STUDIED
GIRL TIME! YAY!
boy call her she might kill you -- i hate to say it
omfg! bestie boy time too!! except these boys need to stop being awkward <3
God bless Mo-eum, she is the truly best friend to both Seok-ryu and Seung-hyo <3
Mo-eum baby you deserve the world <3 i hope he grovels so hard when he realizes how much he mucked up
god this show just nails friendships at all stages, acquaintances, work friends, new friends, new neighbors, long term besties as youth, young adults, later in life. just ALL OF IT!
NOT Tae-hui giving him WEDDING CUPS FOR THE TWO OF THEM??????? A QUEEEEEEEN.
omg he mad a pet house??? for the kitty?? the she saved??? that she is allergic to??? omfg. i am a mess. the baby house he made them, and the upgrade now!!!
WAIT THEY ARE THE BABIES OF THEM??? AHH!!!
SHE WAS HIS FIRST CLIENT!!!! HE MADE IT! FOR HER!!!! WAHHH
date night at the crib! screaming!
he is so happy she was jealous <3 h
he couldnt focus at work??? omfg girl you are wrecking him
"comic books in my room" ooooooo is that what we are calling it now??? heh!!!!
first time in here as a your BOYFRIENNND
he's admitting he went for HER! not the book!
omg he's admitting how nervous he was!!!!!!!
BOY IS IN PANIC MODE FROM DAY ONE!!!!!!!!! WAH!
YAY COMMUNICATION!!!!!!
she said, bad thoughts are fine 🤭 and approved bad deeds? boy we are in it NOW! the DOOR IS SHUT! EEK! THE LIGHT IS OFF? OH HELL YEAH! LFG!
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mockerycrow · 11 months ago
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I SEE YOU EVERYWHERE (Soap x GN!Reader)
soap masterlist
a/n: i wrote this after listening to this song. not proofread LOL enjoy. 984 words! also i’m sorry about how i’m basically non existent. i’m trying, y’all </3
[WARNINGS: MWIII spoilers, major character death, grief, mentions of catholicism. pure angst, hurt/little comfort.]
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Sixty-seven days ago. Two months it’s been, approximately nine whole weeks. Estimating around ninety-five thousand minutes and over five million seconds. 
It’s been sixty-seven days since.. You know. You always wake up feeling like it happened sixty-seven seconds ago instead. Your eyes flutter open and you take a breath, inhaling a certain kind of heavy and thick into your lungs. Your chest expands uncomfortably in the morning, your ribs squeezing your lungs a bit tighter than before. Accompanied with the tightness of your chest is this tingling feeling, so slight it’s almost like background noise, just like how the past few weeks have felt. They’ve flown by in a flash, but at the same time, are oh so slow. 
Sometimes, you wake up expecting to see him standing over your sleeping form to wake you up after staying up a tad bit too late because he insisted you do so. So he wasn’t lonely because ‘The LT denied me’, in his words. Sometimes, your eyes are sick and twisted towards you. Your eyes are faster than your brain and you see him. You see his shadow so thick you’re convinced until you reach upwards, your fingers pushing through the dark smoke that enters your lungs after you’ve blinked. 
You’re sure the others have noticed the toll it’s taken, despite your efforts to hide. You know they’re hurting in their ways, too. Being in a tightly packed task force like this, you’re bound to know each other's tells. Part of you wonders who is hurting the most. Is it Gaz? The man who’s been the most logical out of all five four of you. Is it Ghost? The enigma of your group? He’s always been quiet, hard to read. Harder since.. Everything. Maybe it’s Price. He’s the one who actually saw, really. The one who watched him…
You feel something in your throat bubble, so you push the thought away. 
Then you come back to it. Maybe it’s you who’s hurting most, being his lover. The person he insisted that was his other half he had been looking for. Maybe that’s you being hopeful and cheesy; maybe it’s you being selfish. You aren’t sure. Honestly, you aren’t sure what you should be feeling, nor are you sure how your teammates should be reacting. There’s five stages of grief and everyone’s path looks different. 
Denial – you aren’t sure who you think denial is at first. Symptoms are fear, avoidance. What happened, you can’t avoid it. Not really when he was so integral to the team. Is. He never stopped being. After a few days of people watching, you’ve decided it’s you. You wanted to put it onto someone else at first, maybe Gaz—perhaps Ghost. They’re still.. Living. Going through the motions, at least. But you had to look at yourself late at night, around two forty-five am to ask, “are they the one’s waking up thinking he’s standing over them?”
No. They are not. It’s you. Of course it’s you.
Next—anger. You debated this one, of course it was tied between Ghost and Price but after Shepherd died, of course the Captain took that title with no question. There is a major difference between peaking into the gym, watching Ghost gasp for air after a night full of boxing and then hearing through Laswell the General has been killed. Major difference, indeed. It’s not often your Captain loses his cool and when he does, it’s for good reason. He deserved it, you only wish Price was more cruel.
Bargaining? It’s a no brainer, you decided as soon as you thought of it. Gaz. None of the men cry much, but it wasn’t a surprise when you found Gaz sitting on the steps outside of the temporary base, smoking a cigarette with misty eyes paired with a lost look. A look where he wasn’t completely there; lost somewhere, maybe in thought, maybe back in that moment. In the moment where he had to ignore his mutilated body to focus on the bomb. On the fact that Makarov was getting away. He lit a second cigarette.
Maybe it doesn’t quite fit him, but Ghost was the last one to decide for. Depression is what you ended up assigning him. There’s not many words for how you could describe him. Ghost’s been flighty, quiet yet hostile. He never means to snap at any of you of course, you all know it. You can tell from the heavy, long look he gives you after snarling at you like a cornered dog. He’s just sad and scared, something you can understand on a deeper level. With him, it feels like beckoning a wolf with bits of meat—a wolf who isn’t afraid to bare his teeth. You’re willing to get bit.
Then… what’s left?
Oh, yeah. 
Acceptance. Left for the one who is forever missing.
In a way, it feels wrong. You know he’ll never be able to move on like the rest of the world can. It feels even worse when you realize only a select amount of people will know about his death—the world won’t know who he is. Work in the dark to serve the light, hm? What a fucked world. After spreading his ashes across the hills, it feels like he’s become one with the Earth. Maybe that’s his form of acceptance; going back to what housed him. The green roots and blue skies. The rain that pours down over the ruined cities you’re crawling through, the beautiful stars and planets above you during a late night in God knows where. You see him everywhere.
You hope God is taking care of him, as you rub your fingers over his cross necklace. The last thing you have left of him; his dog tags sitting in a memorial on base. You may or may not believe, but Johnny sure did. And you know, somewhere deep down, he’s alright.
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julilovesyou444 · 1 year ago
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the only exception ~ tom kaulitz
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background: you and Tom had been hooking up for a while now, probably close to around half a year. you had a big crush on him but were very aware that he didn’t do relationships, so even though you were ‘physically’ with him, you never let yourself get super emotionally attached. Tom couldn’t say the same for himself, though. He wanted you, and only you.
warnings: nothing much just kissing and swearing lol
a/n~ sorry for being m.I.a!! I had to visit my dad in serbia and it sucked because I hate my dad and he hates me lolllll speaking of I wrote a fic that was requested where like the ready has daddy issues and tom like helps her through it but I think I made it wayyyy to like serious I think the word is? and its very long so I’m considering scrapping it idk, also I’m getting to all ur requests that I wanna do dont worry !!
~
“hello?”, i said, picking up my phone. it was tom, my long-term fling. I can’t remember exactly how I met him, or exactly how we started hooking-up. I had heard about his band before we met, and I thought they were cool, but i didn’t quite understand just how popular they were. Until after meeting Tom, i didnt know about his ‘reputation’ either. I didn’t know until after the first time we hooked up. He had made us trade numbers, and i was expecting a call at least a day or two after we had seen each other, but nothing. I decided to do some research, just to find out that the boy i was crushing on was in fact a hardcore player. A womanizer, if you will. Part of me wanted to never go out with him again, the smart part of me. But another part of me wanted him so badly, so overwhelmingly bad that I went with my heart instead of my head. I liked Tom, I really did. I couldn’t help it. But I didn’t want myself to get hurt, so I expected just about nothing from him. We fuck and then it’s over. Whenever he would ask me to stay the night or do any of that stuff, I would politely decline and leave. Sometimes we would go out and do non-sexual things, but they always ended sexual. I learned to become okay with that, and I ultimately stopped expecting us to do anything that was hooking up.
“Hey, are you busy?”, he asked.
“Hmm, i dont know, maybe, depends on why you’re calling.”, I teased. he chuckled.
“Uh-huh… well I was thinking, that if you’re free, I could take you out somewhere.”
“take me out, huh? is that code for fucking?”, this earned me another laugh.
“no, no, it can be, but I want to actually take you out.”, he chuckled.
“are you asking me out on a date?”, i asked, a little confused.
“…yes?”
I was quiet for a second, apparently a second too long.
“look if you dont want to, we don’t have to, I just thought-“, he started.
“no, no! sorry! I was thinking but yes, I’m free and we should go out!”, I interrupted. I heard him release a breath he was holding, probably one he didn’t intend for me to hear.
“okay, yea, cool. when can I pick you up?”
“hmm let’s say in about 30 minutes? does that work?”
“perfect.”
“mhm, I’ll see you then.”
“bye.”, he said just before I hung up.
tom kaulitz. taking me out on a date?? what????
I got up almost immediately and started to get ready. I wanted to look as cute as possible. I ran over to my wardrobe and searched through it for a good five minutes. I found this super cute, also pretty tiny, pleated denim skirt and this purple and black top that had a lot of lace detailing and these little puffy princess sleeves. I put on some jewelry, makeup, and these black boots I had. I left my hair down, i noticed that when I did, Tom always complimented it. I grabbed my purse and threw some gum, lipgloss, my phone, and my little digital camera in there.
I glanced at the clock and saw that he should be here any minute. I stepped outside and waited for about 3 minutes, which would’ve been fine, if it wasn’t as cold as it was. I didn’t feel like going back in, just in case he showed up right as i did. I was shivering a tiny bit and got some goosebumps, but to my relief, and pulled in front of my house not too much later. I got in, the warm air of his car heaters hitting me.
“shit, you look freezing. how long were you out there for?”, Tom asked, looking genuinely concerned.
“I’m cold but I’m fine.”, I laughed it off.
“okay, do you need a jacket or-“
“No!! I’m serious! I’m okay.”, I laughed some more.
“okay, okay! just checking.”, he smiled. I watched as his eyes did a quick scan over me.
“you look pretty. your hair looks really nice too.”, he said, his eyes averting back forward as he began to drive away.
“thank you. you don’t look too bad yourself.”
he playfully rolled his eyes but he couldn’t help but smile as well.
“sooo… where are we going?”, I questioned.
“you’ll see.”
“Oh, c’mon. I hate surprises.”
“You’ll like this one, trust me.”
I sighed and faced myself back forward. Some radio station was playing softly in the background as we raced down the highway.
the drive to the mystery place wasn’t far, only a 20 minute drive, which I filled with a lot of talking. mainly about random stuff, Tom telling a few jokes which never failed to make me laugh. He pulled into a parking lot which only had a few other cars. I looked around, it looked like we were at some kind of fancy park. A garden maybe? He leaned over the center console and grabbed something from the backseat.
Tom dropped a large black zip up jacket in my lap.
“My jacket, so you aren’t freezing your ass off the entire time.”
“Oh, thank you.”, i said quietly. He got out of the car and made his way to the back. I followed his lead, getting out of the car, putting on the jacket but not zipping it. I walked around to the back of the car where the trunk was open. There were two big woven picnic baskets. Tom grabbed both and I shut the trunk door as he began to walk off. I caught up with him.
“Do you want me to carry one?”, i motioned to the baskets.
“It’s okay, just follow me.”, he said, continuing his venture into the park. I followed close behind.
We didn’t walk for long, it was a really beautiful park. There were lots of flowers and little benches everywhere. Lots of really big and beautiful trees too. We stopped in front of this big pond, the water was so clear you could see the miniature fish swimming. there was a swan that swam around too.
Tom opened one of the baskets, revealing a big blanket. Without a word, I helped him spread it out over the fluffy grass. He sat down on it and patted the little space next to him, indicating for me to sit down as well. I did. He grabbed the other basket next to him and moved it to be in front of us. Tom opened it and inside were a ton of snacks. All of my favorites. I was shocked to say the least.
“Oh my god, how did you know?”, i said, mouth slightly agaped. He looked proud of himself.
“You mentioned some of your favorite snacks once or twice.”, he nonchalantly shrugged.
“This is lovely, Tom.”, I replied, sounding as genuine as I ever had. His eyes met mine and I gave him a little smile which he returned.
“What is all of this for?”, i added.
“Just wanted to do something nice for you, I guess.”, he mumbled and looked away.
I gently placed my hand over his, his head turned to mine.
“I appreciate it, I really do.”, i smiled. my thumb caressed his hand for a second.
“I like spending time with you, y’know? even when we’re not…”, he trailed off. I laughed, taking my hand off his, an action that didn’t go unnoticed by Tom.
I grabbed one of the many snacks he packed and started to eat. In between bites, I would ramble about different things. He always would just listen to me talk, admiring me as he did. This went on for a while. Tom started eating some. Somewhere in the midst of this, my position changed. I now had my head laid across his legs, my legs stretched out and my hair splayed all over his lap. i stopped eating and just started talking. Tom gazed down at me. Eventually he lit a cigarette and started smoking. He held the cigarettes between his pointer and middle finger, moving it down for me to take a puff. I did, peering into his eyes as I did so. They weren’t filled with their normal lust, but they looked like they had something else in them. I couldn’t figure it out.
Tom talked some too, mainly making crude jokes. I always laughed, no matter how stupid. I think he enjoyed that.
He took a hit and then leaned over, his mouth hovering over mine. I opened and allowed him to blow the smoke in my mouth. He sat back up and watched as slowly blew it out.
“I know this isn’t a normal thing to do when we ‘meet up’, but i really like it.”, Tom said, his fingers intertwined with the ends of my hair.
“Really?”, i asked. I knew for a fact he enjoyed my body, but I wasn’t aware he liked spending time with me when we weren’t doing one another.
“yea… why’s that so shocking?”
“Um, i dont know. I guess I thought you really only wanted sex from me.”
“Oh.”
“Yea..”
“Uh, I guess that’s just what I wanted at first. But the more I started seeing you, the more I wanted to see you again.”
“Oh?”
“Yea, and whenever I would invite you to stay over or do anything like that, you would always say no. Kind of assumed you were the one who only wanted me for sex.”
“I don’t, I just assumed you were trying to be polite or something. It’s stupid, I guess.”
“No, it’s not. At this point, you know me and you know the reputation I have, so i understood why you thought that.”
“Sorry…”, I muttered, feeling a little embarrassed.
“Don’t be sorry.”
We sat in silence for a few moments, but it wasn’t awkward.
“I was thinking about maybe doing this kinda thing more often with you, I mean, we can still do our normal things we do, but maybe we can start doing more of this too.”
“What? Like go on dates?”, i furrowed my brows.
“Yea, something like that.”
“I feel like that’s something only couples do.”, i sorta laughed. He was quiet, which made me sit up, I looked over at him. He was staring at his lap in my absence.
“Is that… not a possibility?”, he murmured.
“But… I thought you dont do commitment? and relationships?”
“Yea, i dont usually.”
“I can’t go on dates with you and act all boyfriend-girlfriend unless you are actually going to commit. I’m not going to do that to myself, Tom. I can’t let myself get hurt like that.”, i said quietly but sternly. I had to be sensible, i didn’t want to be just another girl that got fooled by Tom Kaulitz.
“I know, but i want to try.”, he looked up at me with pleading eyes.
“What changed? What’s different now than from when I first met you?”, I asked, still unsure.
“I hate talking about my feelings.”, he huffed.
“I’m not gonna judge you or anything, I just need to know.”
“You changed me. You did. I didn’t want to date any of the girls I hooked up with for one night because they just weren’t worth it and they didn’t mean that much to me. You’re one of the only girls I’ve consistently seen for more than a month. I haven’t gotten with any other girl than you for like 4 months. I don’t know what it is about you, but I can’t ignore it. And I want more of you. More than just the physical aspects. Dont get me wrong, I love those parts of you too, but i want you for more than just your body. Dude, I can’t stop saying stupid ass jokes to you just because I want to hear your laugh. So yeah, I haven’t ever really commited before because I didn’t really do relationship. But, for you, it’s different. You are the only exception.”
“What? Really? I had zero idea you felt that way at all…”, I replied, astounded.
“Well I do feel that way and have for a little while now.”
“You aren’t playing with me, right?”, i asked, still not believing it.
“Really?? I practically just confessed myself to you and you still don’t believe me?”
“Okay, I’m sorry! You’re right, this was just, unexpected from you.”
“So… what do you think?”
“I want you too, Tom.”, I managed to say. A smile grew on his once nervous face. He cupped my face in his hands and began to lean in.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Mhm.”, i responded. He kissed me so passionately, I felt like I was floating. My hand went to his jaw, my thumb subconsciously tracing little hearts on his lower cheek. I could feel him smile into the kiss. I pulled away, my forehead still connected with his. I started giggling a little, looking away and hiding my face.
“Oh, c’mon. Dont be shy, now.”, Tom pulled my back towards him so I was leaned against his frame, his arms wrapped around my torso. He left little kisses on the top of my head.
“Wow.”
“Hm?”, he hummed.
“Can’t believe I was your only exception.”, i said with a cocky smile in attempt to poke fun at him.
I could feel him roll his eyes.
“Uh-huh, whatever. Its true.”
“I kinda never thought this day would come.”, i said, my finger trailing up and down his, that rested on my stomach.
“Yea, me too, I guess. But I’m glad that it did.”
I smiled, turning my head around to kiss him again.
A new beginning.
His first real relationship.
It was me, I was his only exception.
Something about that phrase made me feel like the most special girl in the world.
~
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sleepyjaneart · 3 months ago
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WWE!Epic the Musical headcanon
Ever since I found this musical out back in July and Jorge's inspiration on fighting games, I've been nursing this idea for WWE headcanons and I need somewhere to vomit all my thoughts out. I have a couple of sketches and references and I'm putting it all under a readmore cause it might be long.
So this all started with Ruthlessness being an absolute BANGER and I love all the animatics that came of it! But I noticed that, in all of them, their Poseidon was always so ANGRY (which, duh) but I also interpreted that Poseidon was also having some vicious fun in a "watch this, I'm about to make this guy's life miserable lol" kinda way. Also, the chorus right at the start chanting Poseidon's name felt so much like one of those super dramatic, fireworks and crowd yelling, WWE entrances that my mind couldn't help but run with the idea.
(this is where I should clarify that I have never watched WWE or wrestling in any form in my life, though it has always looked fascinating to me. I am only going by what I know from cultural osmosis and it would be so cool if people more savvy could add in their ideas to this)
And as much as I wish I could say "I'll just make my own animatic ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ" the fact is that those are incredibly hard to do and I barely draw nowadays so... long text post it is!
So, I'm still playing around with Poseidon's design but I would like to keep it pretty simple. He's one of the major gods with some pretty straightforward domains, so he doesn't need a whole lot to show that he's lord of the seas and earthshaker. I like the idea that the lower in the god ladder it goes, the more work the godlings have to put to make their domain idea come across. Also, with this being WWE inspired, the outfits will look a bit more modern (picking Jorge's idea of more modern = more magical/god-like) but I also don't want them to look too out of place when facing mortals.
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Taking inspiration from wrestlers like Mark Henry or athletes like Eddie Hall (especially the latter), I'm imagining a thickset, heavyweight fighter that looks like he could tap earth or water and it would send everything shaking.
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The entire song is him talking shit at Odysseus so we need some Randy Savage vibes in there; maybe a big flashy coat and sunglasses to start when he first calls out Odysseus. Also, this immediately comes to mind at that part:
OHH-DYSSEUS OF ITHACAAA!
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Do you know who I am?
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And thinking of backgrounds and chorus; this is when the laestrygonians gather too so we would put them up as the audience to watch and cheer for their favourite champion and Poseidon is just constantly rilling them up.
He hurt MY SON! And what do we do to those who disrespect us!? (crowd boos)
(Polyphemus would be there with a "Poseidon is my dad" shirt, of course)
During the "POSEIDON!" chorus at the start, it would also be when the stage would be set: giant pillars raising from the water, connecting together to form a fighting ring, the crowd all gathered around it on the bay. A path also shaping towards the ring from where Poseidon stands as he struts through, waving his arms and hyping the crowd, listening in to the noise.
He doesn't even enter the ring right away, he just saunters around it. The first part is a one sided conversation that he's putting up more for the crowd than to Odysseus, him and his crew small and trapped in the middle of this bewildering scene. Eventually he enters and just knocks them around. These mortals are pathetic but they need to be made an example of and the crowd is eating it up.
And then at the "The line between naivete and hopefullness..." is when Poseidon allows some seriousness in as he's climbing up to one of the posts to then jump off for an elbow drop as he whispers "DIE".
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And just when he thinks he's saving the best for last, he gets blown back against the chords, and sees Odysseus speeding out of the arena and out of sight. He leans back on the chords, anger and frustration through a smile.
Remember me...
Anyway it's 2am and while I have other characters I'd like to headcanon here, I'm tired and for all I know people think i'm insane for this. This idea bug wouldn't leave me alone and I hope putting it out there will help put it to rest. So If you read all this, thank you!!
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