#i promise it won't take me as long to finish and post part four

[vivalas-vega]

new perspectives // part twelve // jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

sooo... it's been almost a year since I updated this fic 🫣 whoops lol but here we are!!! this part does include a glimpse into what's going on w jupiter/heavier topics but I don't get too much into bc a) that's not what anyone signed up for w this fic lol and b) I think any more of a reaction from jupiter would be a little out of character - and I think there's enough love/fluff/silliness in this fic to offset it. but anyway, as always let me know what you think and I promise the next update won't take a year!

new perspectives // part twelve // jake 'hangman' seresin x reader

prologue - one - two - three - four - five - six - seven - eight - nine - ten - eleven

I do not have a taglist, if you'd like to be notified of future works please follow @vegaslibrary and turn on post notifications

word count: 3.7k

warnings: language, drinking, mentions of war/violence/death (but nothing I personally think is too far outside of canon-typical), some angsty inner-monologue type stuff, slight suggestiveness

Time felt like molasses to you lately… the sand in the hourglass wasn’t sand anymore, it was a thick, sticky liquid moving with no sense of urgency. You no longer had any sense of urgency, and it was just about the most horrifying thing for you to go through. Through the chaos of your evacuation and return home you hadn’t really noticed you didn’t have full function of your arm, there was a tingling pain that shot down all the way to your fingertips and so you had to undergo surgery to repair the damaged nerves. A complex thirteen hour surgery, with an even longer recovery time.

Your prognosis was good, fantastic even. Everyone assigned to your case at the hospital was overjoyed with the results, knowing that usually patients that were in your condition were lucky to achieve ninety percent function back but you were well on track for a full hundred percent… but, that didn’t change the fact that you were standing in the middle of your living room, two months after returning home, still unable to do anything other than redecorate the house. Or bake cookies from scratch. Or go through dozens of bananas for suture practice before using them in bread. 

Your mental health therapist had already signed off on your return to work, stating that so long as you kept up with your weekly appointments for the foreseeable future she had no reason to believe you couldn’t perform your job to the fullest extent of your capabilities, but your physical therapist wasn’t as lenient. Heather was incredible, she had worked with every single one of your patients who required the extra step in their healing process and you loved her then, but this was now… and now she was the only person standing in between you and a scalpel. 

Her conditions were clear, you needed to be at a two or lower, with no pain management medication… and you were holding steady at a four. Which, to you wasn’t much, and you regretted uttering the number as soon as you did but now it was out there, and Heather knew when you were bullshitting her. There was nothing to do but do your exercises, attend your twice-weekly appointments and wait… and waiting was not something you were good at.

The house had been organized top to bottom three times, along with yours and Jake’s closets (you’d made some executive decisions on his behalf that you were still arguing about), and you’d finally acquired and hung art all throughout your home. This was good, all things you’d been meaning to get done before everything changed but never had the time to do, and you were glad to have checked them off your list but you didn’t want to be here. You’d finally finished your home and turned it into what you’d always dreamed of but it felt more suffocating than relaxing when you couldn’t leave.

And you could, but what would you do? You’d been to the beach more times in the past two months than you had since moving to San Diego, you’d taken up residence at Penny’s bar and damn near annoyed her into not opening before five ever again, you’d visited all the museums and touristy things you’d never gotten around to, and now you were officially bored. Mind numbingly, insanity inducingly bored. Jake had offered to take some leave and stay home with you but you’d assured him that if you were both stuck together in the house unable to do what you lived for it might threaten your marriage, and you couldn’t deal with that on top of everything else.

You simply wanted to work. You wanted to get back into the swing of things and truly return to your life but you couldn’t. You were thoroughly stuck, and you had no idea how to move through it. Up until now there hadn’t been a single obstacle placed in your path that you hadn’t blown past, and it was driving you mad that there wasn’t a damn thing you could do right now. The only thing in your control anymore was doing your stupid exercises every day, and praying to anything or anyone that would listen to make your body comply with Heather’s stupid rules. There wasn’t even anyone you could talk to that understood your job because they always said the same thing. You know better than anyone how important recovery is post-surgery and how long it can take, it’ll happen when it happens.

“Sparkling water,” Bob said softly as he placed a glass in your hand and you gave him a grateful smile. “How’s it feeling today?”

“Still the same,” you answered and he nodded, very clearly trying to keep the sympathy off his face and you appreciated the effort. It was Friday night drinks and at least one upside to your house arrest was you hadn’t missed a single one in weeks. When you were working it was normal for you to attend maybe once a month, if you were lucky. 

“Hey, perk up over there,” Bradley yelled at you from the pool table and you turned towards him with a slightly confused and slightly annoyed face. “You’re next and I don’t want you souring up the whole place.” 

You let out a laugh, “I’ll sour it up if I damn well please,” you shot back, but you wouldn’t. You hadn’t, you’d kept your mood light and jovial any time you did group outings because you knew they all worried. They had the same love and passion for their jobs as you did, and if they’d been benched for even half as long as you were they’d lose it entirely, and you knew they were kind of waiting for you to snap.

Jake ran into the bar a few minutes later, slightly sweaty and still in his flight suit and you slowly swiveled in your chair as you looked him up and down, not even attempting to hide your thoughts as you sipped your water through the straw. “Hey sweetheart, sorry I’m late,” he huffed out, pressing a kiss to your lips that you reciprocated before pushing him backwards. His arms were particularly massive in this moment and based on his appearance and the fact he didn’t bother to change, you figured Maverick had him do push-ups for some infraction in the air… and you’d never been so pleased to have a rule-breaking husband.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, confused as to why you put a hand on his chest when he tried to step back into you but his concern turned into a full-blown smirk when he realized your eyes hadn’t left his arms. “We’re in public,” he said, almost chastising, but you just shrugged.

“And?” you replied, reaching out and gripping the firm muscle before pulling him back into you for another kiss, letting your hands roam freely over his arms. “What’d you do to piss off Mav?”

“What didn’t he do?” Natasha muttered and you chuckled. 

“You know what? I don’t really care,” you said. “Do it again on Monday,” you added and Jake laughed, kissing your temple.

“Honey, if you want me to do push-ups for you, all you have to do is ask.” His smirk wasn’t going anywhere, and his eyes were a little dark as he looked down at you and it took everything in you not to ask him to drop and give you fifty right in this moment.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” you decided to reply and he gave you a kiss on the forehead before going to get himself a beer. You chatted with Bob and Mickey about the exercise they’d done and they filled you in on what Jake had done while you laughed in disbelief. You knew your husband was good, but you sometimes wondered how the hell he was still around, in a general sense and in the Navy.

“Eliza!” you shouted when you spotted her fiery locks approaching and you grabbed her by the shoulders, “tell me everything.”

She chuckled, looking between you and Bradley, who had been moving to greet his girlfriend before you intercepted. “Uh, hello to you too.”

“Yeah, hi,” you dismissed. “Tell me everything,” you repeated and she just gave you a look before kissing Bradley and settling under his arm.

“Everything is exactly the same as the last time you asked me to tell you everything,” she replied and you huffed. “Patients are patients, attendings are attendings, and the walls are still standing.”

“Oh? Nothing about a Dr. Phillips from Baylor?” you asked pointedly and her eyes widened as she looked up at Bradley accusingly.

“I didn’t say anything!” 

“Why don’t I believe that?”

“He didn’t,” you interjected, “Dr. Stevens called me particularly distressed today about a patient and actually begged me to come down and do something.”

“God damn it,” she groaned and you just raised your eyebrows expectantly. “Look, the new guys an ass but I’m handling it.”

“Unbelievable,” you muttered. “I’ve got some hack in my ER terrorizing my residents and I still cannot get cleared to come back.”

“We’re managing, and we’ll continue to manage until you get back… whenever that is. There isn’t any rush,” she said and you suddenly felt like crying, and to push past that feeling you went down to the bar and ordered yourself a drink, something you’d done very infrequently since returning home. It wasn’t that you couldn’t, your mind had just been a little preoccupied but a little liquid numbing didn’t sound like the worst thing in the world right now.

You took your glass and wandered out onto the beach, picking a spot far enough away from the bar to be free of its noise, and sipped as you stared out at the ocean. You felt completely out of control and powerless, something you’d only truly felt while you were gone, on the other side of the world. With each passing day you felt those same feelings starting to arise and trigger flashbacks, unpleasant sights and sounds you wanted to keep in the past.

You’d spoken about everything that happened at great length with your therapist and you had worked to process it all and figure out how to move forward, but that plan included going back to work. You felt like she truly understood you and how your brain worked, and she understood that the best thing for you in this moment was picking up a scalpel and doing what you do best… but your arm would not cooperate and you, somewhat pathetically, glared at the scar on your bicep.

“What are you doing out here?” Jake asked, plopping down next to you and noticing the way you nearly jumped out of your skin, “hey, I’m sorry… it’s just me,” he said softly, eyeing your expression before putting an arm around your waist. “What’s going on?”

“Having a bad moment,” you replied and he nodded. You didn’t have them often, but when you did Jake always felt incredibly unsure of how to handle it. While you’d talked at length with your therapist about what happened, he got the bare minimum. You didn’t want to worry him, and he didn’t want to push you too far which put the two of you in a bit of an awkward situation when the bad moments came up.

“Was it what Eliza said? I know this is hard but you know better than anyone that these things just take time.”

“Please don’t,” you sighed and he gave you a confused look. “If someone tells me I know better one more time I might actually snap,” you explained. “I just… There isn’t anything for me to do and I don’t know how to just do nothing. I don’t know how to do this… I can’t do this.”

“Hey,” he said, tilting your head towards him and brushing the hair away from your face. “I know this sucks, and I wish I could fix it for you, but… there isn’t anything you can’t do, sweetheart.”

“I couldn’t save them,” you said, with a surprising lack of emotion in your tone as you gazed outwards and Jake was taken aback by the sudden admission, but he didn’t show it. “I couldn’t. Protocol was for me to get to safety… but, I went to the command center anyway, I saw what happened, and there wasn’t anything I could do but hide.” You paused for a moment. “You know, I never had to worry about it. About all the other stuff, I always had a soldier flanking me, watching my back… but it was just me, and what I had wasn’t enough, but it didn’t matter anyway because when I thought it was over and tried to help who I could I still got caught.”

Jake’s eyes were wide as he listened and you finally turned to face him, “I never had to worry about it before. I took an oath, Jake. I took an oath to save people. Some would argue I did the right thing, but I took an oath to do no harm and did the exact opposite, and what was it worth? I couldn’t save anyone.” You looked back out over the water and Jake felt like he was underneath the waves crashing just a handful of yards away, processing what you had just told him and figuring out how to respond. 

You had taken a life, and maybe if you were showing even an ounce of emotion Jake would have known what to say. He would have been able to read that emotion to figure out what you needed, but there wasn’t any. You were still, and calm. He didn’t even know if his own experience on the matter would be relevant enough to help you. He had two confirmed air-to-air kills. He had taken lives, too… but from a distance. There was a layer of separation between him and what he did.

“J, you didn’t do anything wrong-”

“That’s not the point,” you cut him off, but your voice was soft, almost gentle. “I know I didn’t do anything wrong, I did exactly what I was told to. My life was prioritized because of my ability to save others, so I prioritized myself just like they told me to… and it wasn’t worth a damn because I still couldn’t save anyone.” Silence lingered for a long moment before you spoke again. “This isn’t… I was prepared for losing people, this isn’t about that, it’s… helpless. Since the moment I saw what was happening from behind the command center I have felt completely and utterly out of control. I couldn’t do what I was meant to do then and I can’t do what I’m meant to do now. All I can do is wait and I can’t really do that either,” you chuckled humorlessly. “There’s a lot I can’t do, Jake.”

“Come here,” he whispered, tugging you into his lap and you leaned against his chest as you kept your focus on the water. “You will get back to doing what you were meant to. I know it’s taking longer than you want and I am so sorry, but rushing things could leave you worse off than you are now. Your body needs time.”

“Time is overrated,” you replied and he laughed softly, his body shaking you against him. “I’m tired of feeling out of control.”

“So, let’s focus on what we can control, yeah?” he asked and you nodded half-heartedly. “We can do your exercises every night, we’ll keep giving our friends suture covered bananas, and maybe we can find a way to make the most of this time off… we could go on a little road trip?”

“That sounds nice,” you hummed. “Maybe Palm Springs, or Joshua Tree,” you suggested.

“Hell, let’s do both,” he replied and you laughed. “You can come to work with me next week too, we have a bunch of different simulators and things… could help with regaining dexterity and strength.”

“You just want to show off your skills,” you teased.

“Yeah, maybe I do,” he chuckled. “It still might help… and it’s something we can control.”

“Will Maverick be okay with it?” 

“Honey, Maverick will be showing off for you way more than anyone else,” he replied and you let out a laugh. “Feeling better?”

“Yeah,” you nodded. “I just wish they’d let me do an appy, at the very least.”

“You hate appys,” he laughed and you shrugged.

“Desperate times,” you sighed, twisting around in his lap. “I love you, you know that?”

“Well,” he said, already leaning into the dramatics, “I’d sure hope so.” 

You scrunched your nose at him, “you know what? I take it back,” you said and his jaw dropped. “You’re too arrogant,” you added, standing and you suddenly regretted even teasing him because now he was standing too, and chasing you. “Wait, no!” you yelled, trying to dodge him and your laughter echoed all along the beach as you ducked under his out-stretched arms.

“Wow, aren’t you supposed to be like… super fit or something?” you asked, hand on your hip a good few yards away. 

“Oh, you’re just asking for it now,” he laughed, lunging for you again and this time he got you… and miscalculated and sent both of you tumbling into the oncoming waves. The water was freezing and it took you both a minute to figure out which way was up, and when Jake finally broke the surface he heard his favorite sound in the world… your bright, almost maniacal laughter. 

“You are such an idiot!” you screeched, clinging onto him as the waves bobbed you along and he didn’t have a response, too caught up in staring down at your face as he carefully moved the now wet hair out of your eyes… and you forgot to be pretend-mad at him because he was giving you your favorite look in the world. The one that told you he loved you way more than he could ever try to verbally express. You leaned up to press your lips against his and let yourself get lost in the moment, lost in the feeling of him and the gentle sway of the ocean and the fact that while so much was out of your control, there was a lot that wasn’t and that’s all you needed to focus on. 

You let him tug you out of the water when the cold became a little too much to ignore and as you trudged onto the sand you let out a gasp when you realized your toes were sinking directly into the earth, “my sandals!” you yelled, turning and looking back at the ocean as if they’d just be floating there on top for you to pluck out… and of course, they weren’t. 

Jake tried not to laugh, but he couldn’t help himself, “you look adorable,” he said, and you looked down at yourself. Your jeans were completely soaked and clinging to your legs awkwardly, and your white button-up looked frumpy as water dripped from the hem… and you had no shoes. 

“Yeah, well you don’t look much better,” you pointed out, trying to wring out your shirt as you walked back towards the bar. His flight suit was still hanging around his hips, the sleeves in desperate need of a re-tie and his white tank top may as well have not been there at all. Frankly, he did look much better as he tried to shake the water out of his hair with his fingers, but you didn’t want to admit that to him. Not when you had no shoes. 

“I just littered,” you mumbled as Jake pulled the door open for you. “I just littered in the fucking ocean.” 

“Hey, you have all this free time now… we’ll sign you up for some beach clean up to off-set the damage,” he replied and you rolled your eyes.

“Sorry, did we not get the memo for the wet t-shirt contest?” Javy asked, looking at the pair of you skeptically. 

“Ha ha,” you said sarcastically. 

“Huh… pink lace,” Bradley said and your eyes widened, as you looked down at your shirt. “Not what I would have pictured for you, Seresin,” he added and Eliza stifled a laugh while Jake punched him in the arm. 

“You think that’s funny?” you asked, taking a step towards him and he put his hands up in surrender.

“No,” he said quickly. “Incredibly not funny, I didn’t-” he tried but it was too late. You launched yourself onto him and clung as tightly as you could, letting the water from your clothes seep onto him for as long as you could as he tried to push you off. 

“Seresins!” you heard, cutting through everyone’s laughter, and you slowly let go of Bradley and turned to see Penny standing with a no-nonsense expression and crossed arms. “You are tracking water all over my bar!” 

“I’m so sorry-”

“That’s our bad, we’ll-”

“Where are your shoes?” She asked, looking down at your bare feet before tossing towels at you that you both caught with sheepish smiles.

“Ocean ate them,” you replied and she shook her head.

“No shirt, no shoes…” she trailed off as she walked behind the bar and put her hand on the bell. 

“Oh come on-”

“Penny, that’s not even on the sign!” you tried but it was no use. The sound of the ringing bell rang throughout the bar and you nodded in defeat as everyone cheered, turning to retrieve your purse from Bob to start up probably the biggest tab you’d ever have at the Hard Deck. 

“Rules are rules,” she said as she took your card and you gave her a half-hearted glare.

“It’s not even a rule,” you shot back and she just smiled as she placed a pair of sneakers on the bar.

“I want them back eventually.”

“Thank you, Penny,” you sighed, returning to the pool table and sliding them on.

“We absolutely deserved that.”

“Yeah,” Jake said, leaning down to give you a kiss. “We absolutely did.”

[writingintheshadowsforever]

Hi Let Me Explain

Quick Note: This might be a long post so I don't blame anyone who doesn't read the whole thing. This is an explanation, an apology, and an update all in one.

Hi everyone I'm back this time for real. I won't make any promises to posting three to four times a week. I won't make any promises on what series or request will be updated first. I will reassure all of you than none of my series or requests are forgotten about. I have them saved somewhere and plan on finishing them. The plan here is to take it one day at a time. One fic at a time. As I start my journey to finding the joy in writing again.

You see I've been doing a lot of self reflection these past couple of weeks. I've been at war with myself on rather or not to let a dream go. That dream to become this big time bestselling author one day. I didn't want to admit that dream which has always been my biggest dream since like high school was doing more harm than good. The dream of being a published writer is destroying my love for writing. So I need to let it go before I find myself hating writing altogether.

Its never easy to walk away or let go of your dreams especially for creatives. I sort of feel like its harder for any type of artist in whatever field to admit that they want to move onto something else. Because we grow up having to listen to parents and teachers telling us. Its not a plausible goal and to pick a safer path or at least have a backup goal. And most of us decide right then and there no matter what we're going to prove all those people wrong. No matter what obstacles we have to face, how many times we fail, or how long it takes. We are determined to find success with our craft and make them eat those words.

Some of us refuse to even consider another interest or path. Some of us put all our eggs in one basket. Some of us let our craft become our entire identity meaning. Later on if we want to walk away or maybe just put on the back burner for a while. Its like losing who you are as a person. You feel like you've failed yourself and at life for letting go. I say letting go and not giving up because I will never give up on writing or more specifically storytelling.

Storytelling made me the person I am today. I wouldn't be here today without my love for storytelling. It got me out of some dark places as a kid and still does today. Storytelling is the only real magic in this world.

As a writer who feel like the heart of storytelling is dying because of capitalism. I can't let it go. I can't let my love for it die which is why for now I have to let the dream go. It doesn't mean my dream still won't come true one day. And its not like becoming a bestselling author is my only dream. I have other dreams that have take the backseat, and I think its time to move them to the front seat.

For now on I write for the joy of it. I write to get those stories out of me. When it comes to my writing I don't ever want it to be about money or fame. Starting now I'm going to stop stressing over traditional publishing and rather or not I'll ever be good enough.

I'm sorry everyone for being gone so long. For a while a part of me started to contemplate giving up on writing altogether and even deleting this account. I was starting to hate writing because I was so stressed trying to figure out how to achieve success as a professional writer.

I once had a stranger who I didn't know at all tell me that one day I was going to be a great writer. Never met or talked to this guy a day in my life. I felt like it was a sign from God, the universe or whatever you believe in. Either way it was some divine intervention moment letting me know I was one day destined for a long and great career as a professional writer. But do you have to be a professional writer to be a great writer? Is it the same thing? Can someone be great at something but never find traditional success? Those are the questions that have been running my head every time I thought about letting go. I still going to struggle with those questions, but I hope one day I find the answer. What makes a great writer?

After going through my old fics the ones I'm going to get started on are:

Queen Ramonda x Reader Enemies to Lover

Part 2 to being Namor's daughter and choosing Wakanda over Talokan

Steal Your Heart

Not Who You Think I Am

New Marvel Stuff

New Addition

My Hero Academia imagines because its my new anime obsession

[whiteraven87]

Driven by Love: Rebirth from the Ashes - 15. The Fight Continues

-----------------------

The Unstoppable Series - Masterlist

Part 3: Driven by Love. Rebirth from the Ashes

Prologue

Nightmares

For Her, I'd Do Anything

Shared Nights

I Thought It Was the End

Scars

Say it again

Pleasant Views

Oh My God

Together

A Shared Trip

The Boss's Girl

I'm Back

She's mine [18+]

The Fight Continues

I Bloomed

Something's Going On

No Brakes

City of Sin

Title Defense

FIA Gala

Home and Christmas

Just Us

A Dream I Don't Want to Wake Up From

Return to Scotland

The Woman Who Blossoms

Return to the Paddock

Media Circus

Total Domination

Marathon

The Limits of Restraint

The Unexpected Guest

Fear of Loss

The Truth I Didn't Want to Say

I Won't Let You Go

A Promise I Couldn't Keep

The Truth I Couldn't Tell Her

The Last Evening

The Darkest Day of my life

Epilogue

---------------------------

Warnings: slow burn, age gap (23 years), woman racing in F1, boss/driver relationship, sex scenes,

---------------------------

15. The Fight Continues

Brazilian Grand Prix, November

POV Miriell

Since that day, I felt as if a massive weight had been lifted from my shoulders. Years of struggle, uncertainty, and fear that I carried within me were slowly beginning to fade. With each passing day, I realized that I was truly loved and accepted—unconditionally. Toto never stopped proving it to me. He was always there, even though he knew I could take care of myself. My strength didn't scare him—on the contrary, he admired and respected it. And yet, he still wanted to protect me.

The season was coming to an end—four races remained, and the championship battle was intense. Max wasn't backing down; I could feel his breath on my neck. But I had no intention of giving up the title without a fight.

During race weekends, both Toto and I were entirely focused on our work. Every moment was spent in briefings, data analysis, and strategy preparation. We were professionals—we couldn't afford distractions.

But in the rare moments we had to ourselves, in the evenings or short breaks between sessions, our closeness found its way through small gestures. In lingering glances, in a soft brush of fingertips, in a subtle smile that spoke more than a thousand words.

But on the track, only one thing mattered—the fight.

Brazilian Grand Prix

The race in Brazil was chaotic. I started from pole position, but Max overtook me in the first corner, aggressively blocking my racing line. I knew this was going to be a long and difficult race.

For the next laps, I pushed hard, driving on the edge of risk, trying to find a gap in his defense. Red Bull had excellent pace today, and I was fighting not only against him but also against tire degradation. The team informed me over the radio that I needed to manage the rear tires, but I couldn't afford to back off.

Toward the end of the race, the strategy didn't play in my favor. I pitted two laps later than Max, giving him just enough of an advantage to control the pace until the finish. I tried to chase him down, but I was missing just a few tenths per lap.

"P2, Miriell. Good job, you're still leading the championship" I heard James' voice over the radio.

I pressed my lips together. I wasn't angry—I couldn't be. I had given it everything, but today, it just wasn't enough.

"Copy that. Thanks, guys. We keep fighting."

I crossed the finish line in second place, listening to the triumphant cheers in the Red Bull garage. Max performed celebratory donuts on the straight, while I simply returned to the pit lane.

Post-Race Briefing

The atmosphere in the debriefing room was tense but professional. We analyzed the data, discussed strategy, and considered what we could have done better. Toto was calm, composed, but I could tell he was dissecting every detail not just as a team principal, but as someone who knew me better than anyone else.

As the others started to leave, Niki approached me. He crossed his arms over his chest and gave me a thoughtful look.

"Great driving. The fact that Max had the better strategy doesn't change the fact that you were damn fast today."

I sighed, leaning against the table.

"I was fast, but not fast enough."

"It's just one race, Miriell. You still have the lead. And besides..." he smirked slightly "you know there's nothing sweeter than winning on the final stretch."

I looked up and returned his smile.

"You're right."

Toto walked up to us, looking at me with that characteristic mix of concern and professionalism.

"I know you're disappointed, but that was a good race. You fought until the very end."

I nodded.

"This isn't over."

"No, it's just the beginning" he replied with a hint of a smile.

I knew he believed in me. And I knew I had to believe in it too.

Three races remained in the season. Everything was still possible.

----------------------------------------

NEXT -> 16. I Bloomed

----------------------------------------

"I put my armor on, show you how strong I am."

Read the story here:

AO3 Unstoppable Series

Wattpad: Part1 I Part 2 I Part 3

🇵🇱 Dla Polskich czytelników [for Polish readers] [PL]:

Seria Niepowstrzymana AO3

Wattpad PL: Part1 I Part 2 I Part 3

[justsingersandbeats]

OFFICIAL HIATUS POST

Heya! Mun Chorus, aka Choco, here. It's... been a while, I know, and I'm sorry this update isn't a good one.

Lately I just haven't felt the motivation to work on this blog. To be honest, I haven't exactly had the same kind of interest in JSaB as when I started this blog. And this blog is old. Old enough that the story feels, in some ways, dated to me, and I have better ideas that I want to work on and build.

I think a good part of it is that I'm just tired. JSiAB has had upwards of 150 story posts over four years. That doesn't sound like a lot, but I draw multiple panels for each one. I think it's safe to say I've had to make at least 300+ drawings for this blog alone, and that takes a toll on a guy. It takes a long time for me to finish even one drawing, plus I've had limited time to draw for many months.

I've had other projects and ideas in my head, but every time I've wanted to work on them, reason says I should just finish what I started, and instead of working on them, I go back to drawing JSiAB. It feels like it's holding me back from pursuing the other projects I want to do. So there are four years' worth of ideas rattling around in my skull. Which is not a good feeling, lemme tell ya.

So, for now, I think I want to take a public break. I think it might be good for me to just tell you all I'm not going to draw for this or make any major pieces for it.

If you still want content, I can give character facts or short writeups if you ask (like what's everyone's Stardew marriage candidate or something, which is a question I put thought into) but the plot won't be progressing for a good while.

I can't tell you when I'll return to this blog, but if it's any reassurance, I hate leaving projects unfinished. And I do love the characters of JSiAB. I promise that at the very least, I will publicly explain the rest of the story someday, even if I don't draw it out.

Apologies, and see y'all sometime!

[links-in-time]

Links in Time : The Beginning of Something

Part 11

Notes.

I am so loving writing this fanfic. In truth I've almost finished it and I'm just resisting posting the whole thing in one big dump! I have fallen in love with my OC and their relationship with Wars is going to begin to develop a bit in this update so if you are a Warriors Stan there is a lot more of your boy to come.

"You know if it was just me I would have climbed up Mount Hylia and paraglided down into Gerudo Canyon Pass," Wild informed the others as he crunched down on an apple. "Much quicker than this." He said through a mouth full of apple.

They had left Gartan and Karu on the plateau. Gartan had said that there were more old hideouts where Yiga could still be operating from. He and Karu wanted to eradicate the Yiga from Hyrule as much as possible. Before Maari and the boys left camp however, Gartan clutched at Wars sleeve as he passed by.

"You will all keep her safe, won't you. I trust my daughter too look after herself, but she can sometimes be impulsive. Will you try and protect her?"

Wars looked down at the hand gripping his sleeve, then up at Gartan's face. He didn't know much about familial love, or the concern of a father for his child. But Wars could see it in the man's face, his eyes imploring.

"We will. I will try to keep her safe. I promise." Wars assured him, nodding his head.

Walking back down from the plateau the way they had come Wars thought about the promise he had made. He hadn't told the others yet. He would have to wait for a moment when Maari was out of earshot. Something told him Maari wouldn't appreciate the idea of being watched over. But her father was right. She was impulsive. But Wars kind of liked that about her.

"Except you're not on your own and none of the rest of us have gliders, so we have to take the long way around," Time replied to Wild's earlier comment.

Wind groaned at the thought of more walking. Sky patted him on the back comfortingly.

"I'm sure it's not much further to the desert," he said brightly.

"Oh no it's still a long walk. We have to get around the north side of the plateau. Then cross the suspension bride, then make our way along the canyon. And then cross the desert," Wild replied.

Wind's face fell and his head dropped.

"Come on kid," Twi slapped him on the shoulder. "Just one foot in front of the other and we'll be there in no time!"

Spirits were high as they followed the roads leading to the canyon entrance. Wild pointed out the colleseum on top of the hill where he had fought a great Lionel. As well as the construct camp where newly repurposed constructs were helping to build a new stable.

As they approached the suspension bridge the day was starting to drag behind them. Midday was approaching and Wild knew they still had a long way to travel.

"Once we reach the canyon, how far to Gerudo Town?" Four asked.

"It'll probably be night by the time we reach the desert gateway. There's a stable at the end of the canyon. We could spend the night there." Wild suggested.

"I heard it's better to travel the desert at night. It's cooler at night and I don't know about the rest of you, but I don't have any elixers with me to help with the heat." Maari pointed out.

"Is that right?" Time asked. Wild paused in his tracks.

"I didn't think about that. I usually change clothes or use elixers to deal with the desert heat. I hadn't thought about the rest of you, sorry" Wild apologised.

"It's okay," Twi remarked. "Maybe it would be a good idea for us to travel at night."

"You mean, no sleep?" Sky groaned.

"You saying a knight of skyloft can't go a night without sleep?!" Legend teased.

"Hey, just because I like my sleep doesn't mean I can't go one day without it. I only meant that without rest after all this walking we might not all be on top form." Sky reiterated for the others.

"It's only one night of walking. We can rest when we get to Gerudo town," Wild assured them.

"It might still be a good idea to stop at the stable. Someone there might have seen the Yiga come through recently." Maari suggested.

They agreed to stop at the stable and take a short rest before nightfall. Maari couldn't wait to see the desert. She had read many tales about the Gerudo women and the vast sea of sand which lay beyond the mountains. She had heard about the terrible Molduga that roamed the sands stalking their prey from below. The amazing sand seals and how the Gerudo would ride them. Mostly she was excited to meet the Princess Riju. She had heard a lot about her from Paya, but the clan leader had only spent a short time with the princess and only had a few tales to tell.

"Wild, you've met Princess Riju haven't you?" Maari asked, as the group meandered along the canyon.

"Met?! We fought together against the Demon King. We went through a lot together. Riju is extraordinary." Wild replied, his eyes turning wistful with memory.

"Do you think she'll let you all into her city?"

"Hmm, hard to tell." Wild lowered his voice so only Maari could hear. "Don't tell the others but I ussually to have to disguise myself to get into Gerudo Town."

"You mean you dress as...? Maari asked, but Wild hushed her.

"Shh, not so loudly. They'd only tease me relentlessly."

"Well I think that's cruel. You found an ingenious way to sneak in without being detected. I'd say that's pretty smart," Maari encouraged him.

"Thanks," Link uttered, a slight blush flushing his ears.

"I bet you're looking forward to seeing Zelda again. How long has it been?" Maari asked cheerfully.

When she turned to look at Wild however his smile had disappeared.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine," he said curtly.

"Are you?"

"It's nothing. It's just... You're right it's been a while since I've seen Zelda. A lot's changed in a short amount of time. I don't think I'm the same man I was a few years ago. And I'm not sure Zelda is the same anymore either. I guess..." Wild seemed to struggle to find any more words.

"Are you nervous about seeing her?" She asked, laying a hand on Wild's shoulder.

"I guess so."

"Do you mind if I ask, we're you two... We're you ever a couple?" Maari asked cautiously. Link sighed and turned his gaze skyward.

"After we defeated Ganon and saved Hyrule from the calamity, we were just so happy to have each other back safe. We did a lot together after that. Then when Zelda disappeared again, I nearly fell apart. My quest kept me going and so did my friends. But when I got her back again something was different. I don't know how else to describe it. I just, I hope we can still be friends."

***

There were a few travellers at the stable when the group arrived. Some researchers looking to deliver some more items for Zelda, a hunting party who claimed they had been paid handsomely to slay a Molduga and come back with its teeth, as well as other travellers on the road.

Since there were still a couple of hours until sundown the gang decided to take the weight off their feet and rest around the stable until nightfall. Wild cooked up some supper for them all while Maari went to talk to the stable keeper.

"Excuse me Sir, I was wondeiring if there have been any Yiga sightings recently. Or stories of anyone nearby going missing?" She asked, leaning against the counter.

"Yiga ey? Hmm, can't say I've seen any myself. Then again they could have walked right by in disguise and I wouldn't have known it." The man replied, stroking his goatee as he thought.

"I suppose that's true," Maari sighed.

"Though some folks came through a couple days ago, said one of their party had disappeared on the road. Walked into the woods to relieve himself and never came back again. Damn shame if you ask me. Hyrule was just starting to feel safe again. Now there's talk of monsters lurking about too," the man shook his head in dismay.

"Hopefully my friends and I can do something about it and make you feel safe again Sir," Maari tried to assure him.

She thanked him for the information and strolled away from the stable. Wars, sky and Twi were sitting on a collection of boulders a short distance away. Maari walked over to join them and watch the last of the sunlight disappear into the west.

"Hungry?" Twi asked, holding up a few slices of bread filled with cheese and salad leaves. "Wild made you a sandwich, or that's what he calls it. He said you would probably be vegetarian so he didn't put any meat in it."

"That's very thoughtful, thank you Twi." Maari took the sandwich gratefully and took a few bites.

Sitting down between Sky and Wars on a sandy boulder Maari gazed into the hazy light filling the canyon. The sun had almost disappeared but the heat of the day still radiated from the sand beyond.

"Any of you ever crossed a desert before?" Asked Maari.

"I have, couple of times," Sky replied. "Didn't like it one bit. It was unbearably hot, sand gets in places you don't even want to know about. And don't get me started on the crazy monsters that like to live there."

"Sounds charming!" Maari replied sarcasticly.

"Good thing you suggested crossing at night Mar," Wars remarked. "You were right, hardly any of us are equipped for desert travel. I've already ditched my armour and mail. Feel cooler without it already."

"Heck of a lot less safe though," Twi pointed out. "We get attacked by something you better watch your back."

"Wind barely wears any protection, I don't see you fretting over him," Wars replied, gesturing in the younger hero's general direction.

"Yeah well Wind isn't as clumsy as you. He's smaller and nimble too," Sky pointed out. Wind or Maari could out manoeuvre Wars or a bokoblin any day." Sky nodded.

"You reckon?!" Asked Wars, raising an eyebrow as he gave Sky a sly smile.

"What do you think Maari? You've fought beside the Captain, do you think you can take him?" Twi asked, barely disguising the eagerness in his voice as he joined their conversation.

"What d'you say Mar? We've still got a little time until sunset."

Wars turned his teasing gaze on Maari and for the first time she clicked the nickname he had given her. She wasn't sure she liked it but she didn't dislike it either. Perhaps a little friendly bout would help her decide.

"Alright pretty boy, you're on. Come and show me what you've got!" Maari encouraged him, getting to her feet and walking over to where there was a more open space away from the stable.

"Wait, what?!" Wars stammered, a little taken aback that Maari had actually accepted the challenge.

"You heard her Cap, go show the lady what you've got," Twi teased, punching Wars on the shoulder.

Wars looked to his left at Sky, but the other hero just shrugged. Wars sighed, but quickly hardened his expression. He drew his sword and shield, leaving the reast of his gear with the others.

"Alright then, what are the ground rules?" Wars sighed, as he approached Maari, adjusting the straps on his shield.

"First to draw blood?" Maari suggested, only half joking.

"How about we avoid shedding any blood and just try to disarm the other or get inside their defences?" Wars suggested, trying to be a little more pragmatic about the situation.

"Agreed. Don't hold back Captain, I certainly won't."

Maari drew her sword and held it out to the side, lowering her stance as she waited for Wars to be ready. As the light began to fade and the lamps around the stable were lit, Maari and Warriors faced off against each other. Time, Wild and the other heroes joined Twi and Sky to watch what was happening.

"What are those two up to?" Time asked, taking a swig from his water-skin.

"Maari challenged Wars to a duel," Sky announced.

"He goaded her into it s'more like it," Twi corrected.

"Suppose it's good for us to have a little friendly competition from time to time," said Hyrule.

"How about a friendly bet too?" Legend suggested.

Though some of Wars' moves were predictable, Maari wasn't used to facing an opponent with a shield. It made him much more difficult to attack, and he kept using it to try and knock her off balance. He was surprised by just how quickly she could move. One moment he was about to swing his sword at what he thought was an opening, then she would duck and spin away from his attack. And each time she would retaliate with a strike of her own that he would barely have time to block. Lunging attacks were no use as she parried them easily, however he found that if he kept his shield up and his weapon tighter to his body, he gave her fewer opportunities to attack.

This technique worked brilliantly. Until Maari decided she had had enough of Wars slamming his shield into her back. Dropping low she kicked upwards and to the side, knocking Wars' shield from his grip and sending it spinning across the sand.

"Damn it!" He shouted.

Maari's move earned some cheers from the crowd which had gathered to watch the fight. The other Link's were all rooting for their favourites, shouting out suggestions for moves and counter moves.

"What's the matter captain, can't hide behind your shield any more."

"Dont need it," he huffed. Suddenly remembering the promise he had made to Maari's father about keeping her safe. He wasn't sure if this counted or not. "I don't need it to beat you."

"We'll see about that."

Wars now held his sword in two hands, throwing extra power and precision into his swings. Maari had to adapt slightly and also used both hands on her katana. So far as the audience could tell they were pretty well matched. They came together with a clash of steel, blades grinding together as they battled for control of the lock. Their faces were inches apart, eyes locked onto each other's.

"You want to surrender know and save yourself the embarrassment of me beating you?" Maari asked between breaths.

"I'd rather you beat me fair and square. Wouldn't you?" He asked.

Maari noticed he asked the question without his usual note of humour. Wars was being serious. He was taking this fight seriously, which meant he took Maari seriously too. Maari smiled a little but the surprise change in her opponents deminour distracted her enough that Wars managed to hook his hilt under her guard. With a quick twist of his wrists Wars flicked the blade out of Maari's grip and it went spinning away before clattering to the ground. Wars grabbed her right arm and held her close as he brought his blade up to her throat.

"Close, but I'm afraid I think I win this one Mar," he sighed, smiling as he tried to slow his breathing.

"I think I'd call it a draw," Maari replied.

Wars frowned then Maari glanced down at his chest. He followed her gaze to find one of her ring daggers in her left hand, pointing straight at his heart.

"Ah, I see your point. A draw?"

"A draw," Maari agreed.

Carefully they each withdrew their weapons and collected their fallen items. Maari sheathed her sword while Wars checked for dents in his shield. They returned to the crowd and were surprised to hear people clapping and congratulating them both.

"So not even a Sheikah warrior is a match for a legendary hero," Legend boasted, crossing his arms and beaming from ear to ear. "Alright, all those who picked Maari, pay up!"

"You placed bets?" Wars asked, wishing he was surprised by the Vet's behavior.

"And now five of them owe me money," Legend confirmed.

"I'm afraid it was a draw Legend," Maari informed him.

"Wait, five?" Wars asked, also crossing his arms. "Five of you bet Maari would beat me! Alright, who are the traitors?"

Maari watched as Wars visibly put back on his mask of brovado and questioned his friends in his usual joking manner. Bashfully, Twilight, Sky, Four, Time and Wild raised their hands.

"Really?" Wars whined.

"Oh come off it," Twi countered. "You thought she was gonna beat you. I could see it in your eyes."

Wars looked a little bashful and a little flush rose in his cheeks. Maari decided to save him from any further abuse. She laid a hand on his shoulder and addressed the gang.

"It was a very close fight. I've rarely fought anyone outside Kakariko, so it was a challenge for me. The Captain is a skilled fighter. I'd certainly rather have him by my side in a battle than on the opposing side."

At last the sunlight faded and the group stood silhouetted by lantern light, preparing to make their nightime desert crossing.

< Part 10 : Part 12 >

[totaldramafan-lauri]

As I was sitting there eating my birthday cake, talking with my family...I realized something.

It hit me just how.....fffffffflipping nervous I am.....

Holy crap, I am terrified of doing this....

I-I mean, it's nothing new.....I was really nervous submitting practically ALL of my previous fics too. Heck, I remember right after posting Bruises, I took a break from all my socials for a whole day just to get my mind off it. There's always that feeling of "dear god I just realized how AWFUL this is, why am I doing this, no one's gonna read it", but....this is a special case.

This will be my first time EVER submitting an unfinished fic. That's the big thing for me. My mind is currently going through every single worst-case scenario trying to tell me how bad of an idea this is. "People are gonna be unsatisfied". "They're gonna be super critical of how slow it is". "They're gonna say it was a waste of their time". Most of the BIG STUFF hasn't happened yet, and that's why....

...part of me is thinking....Maybe I just should've been more patient. Maybe it would've been best to just....wait to post the completed story all at once. That probably would've been the best thing to do, and would've been a victory lap for this finished project....

....b-but I know I can't do that anymore. I-I promised people I'd do this. I-I CAN'T go back on that, or I'd look like the biggest coward....Now that I know there are people that are interested in this thing, I can't take it back and be like "actually, never mind, I'm waiting til it's all done". Especially since I dunno when that'll be right now...

I-I told them I'd post the first three chapters (although they might have to become four chapters on AO3 if Chapter 3 needs to be split for character limit reasons, it's still roughly the first half of the story that's done, no matter how many chapters it is).

I-I just really don't wanna let people down by this thing not being good enough....

I know I'm probably overreacting.....I-I know that....p-people who won't be into this, aren't gonna read it, cuz AO3's tagging system is the best thing ever. The only people that are gonna be clicking should be my fellow simps, who won't mind long fics, who won't mind slow pacing, who will see it's incomplete, and who will most likely read my notes. There's also the fact that I still don't like Chapter 1, but I'll be sure to let people know it gets "better" after that. That chapter no longer being on its own is a good thing about this....

I-I'm gonna be OK.....I-I'm almost ready....I-I can do this....

I can...do this......

[scenes-in-between]

Trust No 1 (Part three)

“Who authorizes you? I mean, what gives you the right? Who ARE you?!”

“I’m the future, Agent Scully. And I risked my life being here.”

“Well then why do it? I mean, why meet me?”

“Because you can reach Mulder. Mulder needs to know what I know or he may have no future. Perhaps no one will. Another car is parked on the main road, half a mile out. If I see that you haven’t contacted Mulder in the next 24 hours, I disappear and you never see me again. Do you understand, lady?”

Scully stalks away, seething. All of the theatrics, all of the waste, and for what? A two-minute conversation that raised more questions than it answered? What was the point of any of it?

Scowling, she pulls her phone out of her jacket pocket - because apparently it was absolutely necessary to blow up her clothes and her gun and inspect her watch, but Mr. Mysterious had no qualms about letting her keep her phone? - and punches the speed dial for Monica Reyes. Monica picks up immediately.

“Dana! Thank god. We’ve been trying to reach you all day. Where are you?”

“At the end of a very long and very stupid wild goose chase,” she grumbles. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get in touch earlier. How’s William?”

“He’s just fine. John’s in the kitchen right now heating up a bottle for him.”

“Agent Doggett stayed with you?” she asks, surprised.

“Not the whole day,” Monica says. “After that couple left, he went to the office for a while, but then he came back a few hours ago when we still hadn’t heard from you. Seriously though, where have you been?”

Scully answers with a groan, then gives an abbreviated account of the day’s events as she continues making her way back to the main road. Her foot catches on something in the dark and she stumbles, cursing. Of all the times to be without a flashlight…

When she gets to the part about the car and the remote detonation, Monica says, “Holy hell, Dana! Do you need one of us to come get you?” 

“No, he said there’s another car parked up the road. I’m heading toward it now.”

“But are you sure that’s safe?” Monica presses. “What if it’s rigged to explode, too?”

“Whoa, wait, what’s rigged to explode?” Scully hears Doggett say in the background, and she shudders at the thought that she spent the entire day driving around on top of a bomb. However, the fact that she’s still alive right now is a fairly good indicator that she’ll be able to get home safely.

“If he wanted me dead, he had ample opportunity,” she says. “No, what he wants is for me to contact Mulder, which I can’t very well do if I’ve been blown up. I’ll be fine.”

“You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

What she’s not sure of is exactly where she is right now. It became harder and harder to track her relative location after she left the interstate. The very notion of spending who knows how many more hours on the road fills her with a mix of exhaustion and dread, and she’s angry all over again at the phenomenal waste of time today has been.

“Maybe you can help me figure out where I am, though,” she says. “It was too dark to read the street signs, the last couple of turns he told me to make, but I was on Route 17 going north for a while, somewhere between Norfolk and Fredericksburg. It’s not much to go on, but it’s all I’ve got at the moment.”

“I’m on it,” Monica tells her. “Can I use your computer?”

“Of course.”

“Here, you can talk to John while I pull up MapQuest.”

Ahead, Scully can just make out the bulk of a vehicle in the darkness. She reaches to unsnap her holster out of habit and grimaces when her fingers catch nothing but the fabric of her waistband.

In her ear, Doggett barks, “What in the heck’s going on? Where’ve you been all day, and why is Monica talking about things being rigged to explode?”

Scully sighs. “I’m going to let her fill you in on the details because I would just as soon not go through it all again right now. Short answer is that I’m fine, just tired and frustrated. I’ll be on my way home soon, hopefully. I want to thank you, though, for helping to look after William. I really do appreciate it.”

“Well, you’re welcome, but I didn’t do all that much. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

She approaches the car, again wishing she had a flashlight. It’s too dark to see anything through the rear windows, but the front of the car at least appears to be empty. Cautiously, she reaches for the door handle; it’s unlocked, and the interior light comes on when she opens the door. There’s a piece of paper on the driver’s seat.

“Son of a bitch,” she murmurs, picking it up.

“Agent Scully?”

“You can tell Agent Reyes that I don’t need her help after all. I’ve been left a map.”

“A map?” Doggett asks. “So where are you?”

Thirty miles. She is all of thirty miles from Fredericksburg. It is going to take her less than two hours to get home. It could have taken her less than two hours to get here. Of all the stupid, pointless, absolutely and completely asinine...

“Just a bit southeast of Fredericksburg,” she says tightly, glancing at her watch. “I should be home by nine.”

“All right then. Be careful.”

“Yeah.”

***

This isn’t the first time Monica has been asked to watch William, but it is the first time she’s had to try and put him to bed.

And he is not having it.

She’s never seen him like this. She’s never felt him like this; William’s energy is always vibrant -- she’s known that since the night he was born -- but it’s usually contained, like the potential energy in a compressed spring. Tonight, it’s like a storm, howling around him as he wails in her arms.

“I don’t know what’s wrong. Should we call Dana?”

John chuckles at her, evidently unconcerned, because of course he can’t feel what she feels.

“There’s nothing wrong. And there’s nothing she could do even if there was. He’s just tired.”

“No, John, I’m telling you, something is--”

“Here,” he says, holding out his hands. “I’ll show you.”

She passes the squirming baby to her partner and steps back, nerves jangling. John gathers William against his chest and starts to walk around the living room, gently bouncing him while murmuring softly. At first, Monica can’t hear what he’s saying over the sound of William’s cries, but as the boy gradually quiets, John’s words become clearer.

“There you go, easy does it, your mama’s gonna be home soon, don’t you worry, atta boy…”

He’s asleep within minutes, energy storm subsided. Monica shakes her head, a little abashed at having so comprehensively misread the situation. 

“You were right,” she says quietly.

“Eh, nothing I hadn’t seen before, that’s all.” He doesn’t meet her eyes, his gaze still trained on the top of William’s head as he slows the bouncing to a gentle sway. “Luke certainly did his share of fussing.”

She didn’t know him then, of course. She’s only ever known him as a grieving father; this is the first time she’s gotten a glimpse of what he was like as a dad, and it makes her unexpectedly emotional. 

“I’m gonna see if I can go put him down,” he says, and she nods, watching him go before turning to pick up the few scattered toys and take William’s dinner bottle back to the kitchen.

***

By the time she has retrieved her own car from where she left it parked this morning, after stewing on the whole drive home and running through the day’s various cryptic conversations over and over, Scully has come to three conclusions.

Number one: nearly everything that man claimed to know about her, he could have learned by bugging her apartment and going through her garbage bins. What did he really give her that was concrete? Knowing her clothing size seemed eerie at first, until she remembered the receipts she’s thrown away from a handful of recent shopping trips. Her childhood clown phobia? She and her mom were laughing about that in her living room a month or so ago. The rest of it -- resting heart rate, ATM pin, college boyfriend, et cetera -- was only specific enough to seem unnerving without actually proving that he knew any of it.

Her emails to Mulder would require some additional access, but that could be as simple as someone following her to the cafe. It’s probably one of the “regulars” that she -- blithely, it would seem -- dismissed as a potential threat.

Number two: while her apartment has definitely been under surveillance, apparently for quite a while, Mulder’s has not. The “one lonely night” the man mentioned? She’s reasonably certain he was referring to the night she asked Mulder to stay after the IVF failed, and that was not their first time together. If, as he said, the events of that night surprised him, then he could not have known about what they had already been doing at Mulder’s place. Or, for that matter, what they had been doing at her place before that night. So now she also knows approximately when the surveillance actually began.

Number three: if this man genuinely does have useful intel about super soldiers -- and that is an extraordinarily big “if” -- then it may in fact be worthwhile to call Mulder home. The idea terrifies and thrills her in almost equal measure. On the one hand, there is nothing she wants more than to have him home. Nothing. But on the other, if she has miscalculated, and calling him out of hiding only ends up getting him killed, she will never forgive herself.

In the end, it is Agent Doggett’s words from yesterday that settle the issue for her. If we know who these super-soldiers are we can go after them. This is somebody giving us a way that can make it safe for Mulder to come home. 

How else are you going to get him home?

It’s a risk, possibly a big one, but ultimately, it’s one she has to take. He has been gone for almost seven months. This is the first time in those nearly seven months that there has even been a chance he might be able to come home. If she lets this chance go by, how much more time will pass before they get another one?

She walks into her apartment having made up her mind. There is a giddy, fluttery feeling in her stomach that is only temporarily eclipsed by ravenous hunger as she steps through the door and the smell of Thai food envelops her. Reyes and Doggett look up from where they’re sitting, at her kitchen table, takeout cartons amassed between them.

“Hope you don’t mind, we got takeout,” Reyes says, standing. “We didn’t know if you’d have a chance to eat, but if you’re hungry, there’s a bunch left.”

The last thing she ate was a bag of almonds from the gas station, hours and hours ago. To say she’s hungry is a massive understatement.

“Mind? I could kiss you both right now.”

Doggett’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline, and Reyes laughs. “I’ll get you a plate.”

Scully nods. “I’m just going to change and wash up.”

On her way to the bedroom, she grabs a plastic bag from the closet. The likelihood is slim that there will be much in the way of usable trace evidence on the clothes she’s wearing, but it would be irresponsible not to even look. She opens the bedroom door quietly so as not to wake William; by the soft glow of the bedside lamp, she can see him sleeping peacefully in his crib, and she smiles, some of the tension from the day melting away. Though she would love a shower, she's too hungry, so she settles for changing into sweats, carefully folding and bagging the "borrowed" outfit, then washes her hands and face before heading back to the kitchen.

Doggett and Reyes have tidied up their dishes and are in the process of putting on coats and shoes.

"We'll let you get some rest," Reyes says, though she’s looking at Doggett when she does. “Whatever else you might have to tell us about what happened today can wait until tomorrow.”

“Unless,” Doggett adds, in a tone that sounds like he’s continuing an argument from earlier, “there’s anything you think we need to know now. Or if you don’t feel safe staying here alone, knowing that this Shadow Man may well have eyes and ears on you.”

“Is that what we’re calling him?” Scully asks, arching one eyebrow. “Look, I appreciate the offer, but I’ll be fine. As violating as it feels to be surveilled by some NSA creep--” she emphasizes the words, fully assuming that she’s being listened to right now “--I don’t have any reason to believe that William and I are not safe here.”

“Well I still don’t like it,” Doggett says, frowning. “Why don’t you let us post a couple agents out front, just in case?”

“I really don’t think that’s necess--”

“That’s a good idea, actually,” Reyes interjects, then drops her voice to a murmur. “Especially in light of what happened this morning. We know you can take care of yourself, Dana, but we also don’t know exactly what we’re up against, here. Maybe the answer is to try and watch the watchers, find out who they are, see if we can figure out who else the Shadow Man is working with.”

Scully sighs but has to admit that’s a sensible course of action. Either the knowledge that she’s being watched over will deter this so-called Shadow Man and his associates, or it won’t, in which case they could be exposed and identified.

“All right,” she agrees.

“Good,” Doggett says. “I’ll take first watch until I can get someone else over here.”

As soon as they leave, Scully makes herself a plate of food and takes it to her computer desk. If the Shadow Man is able to access her emails even when she sends them from the internet cafe, it seems pointless to wait until morning to write to Mulder. The giddy feeling from earlier comes rushing back as she types.

Mr. Hale,

I am overjoyed to tell you that circumstances appear to have changed. Exercise caution, but put the plan in motion. I cannot wait to see you.

All my love,

Dana

She clicks “send” with her heart in her throat, wondering where Mulder is and when he’ll be able to read her message. How long it might take for him to make the necessary arrangements and begin the journey home. He could be in her arms as early as tomorrow, a notion that seemed impossible just 24 hours ago.

She powers down the computer -- according to their plan, his next communication will come via text message from a burner phone -- and picks up her plate to finish eating in the kitchen. A glance out the window as she stands up reveals Agent Doggett sitting in his truck across the street, cell phone held to his ear. She sighs, regretting the additional work and worry she’s given her former partner but also deeply grateful that he’s got her back, he and Reyes both. She appreciates them more than she can say.

With any luck, all of this will soon be over. Mulder will come home, the Shadow Man will give him the information they need to take down the super-soldiers, and things can go back to… well… “normal” for them, anyway. It’s maybe too much to hope for, but right now, she will allow herself to be comforted by the fantasy, at least for a little while. When she finally crawls into bed, later, she falls asleep with her cell phone on the pillow beside her, imagining the sensation of being wrapped securely in Mulder’s arms.

***

“Holy shit,” he breathes, reading her email for the third time.

The library’s just about to close, and he had checked his email one last time before leaving, more out of impulse than any actual expectation that there would be anything there. The surprise of a new email was immediately eclipsed by the surprise over its contents.

Home. He can go home. He and Gibson both, even. No more hiding in the desert. No more ache of longing binding his stomach and keeping him from sleep. It almost sounds too good to be true, but she called him Mr. Hale, the code phrase they established before he left so he’d be able to tell a genuine summons from a trap. This is the real deal.

Which means the threat is past. Maybe Skinner cut a deal, hell, maybe Kersh did. Who knows? Who cares?! He gets to go home!

The grin on his face is massive as he logs off and heads for the door.

***

“You’re leaving," Gibson says, before Mulder has even closed the front door behind himself. "You promised you wouldn’t. But I guess I shouldn’t have expected you to keep that promise.”

It's still weird, Gibson knowing what he's thinking about before he's even said anything, but it doesn't throw him for a loop the way it used to.

“No, we’re leaving, Gibson. Both of us.”

Gibson scoffs. “You know I’m not going anywhere. It’s not safe. You might be able to outrun them if they catch us, but I--”

“Scully said it’s safe. And yes, I’m sure the message really was from her.”

Gibson stares hard at him and Mulder thinks as forcefully and loudly and clearly as he can.

We can both be free. I swear. I will protect you.

“I believe that you believe that,” Gibson says finally. “But I don’t think either of us knows for sure whether that’s really true.”

“Look, I know you’re scared. And you’re right that there are no guarantees. But for the first time since I left Washington, there is at least a chance that it’s safe for us to get out of here. If we don't take it, I don't know when another one is gonna come along. Do you really want to hide here for the rest of your life?"

"If it doesn't mean dying horribly and having my head karate chopped off by an alien replicant? Yeah. I'm fine with that."

Mulder’s thoughts flicker, involuntarily, to Dr. Parenti’s severed head in a jar, to the gash in Skinner’s forehead, to his own memory of being hurled across Parenti’s lab by Billy Miles.

“Exactly,” says Gibson. “I’m not letting that happen to me.”

“I trust Scully,” Mulder says, thinks. “She wouldn’t call me home if it wasn’t safe. She’s too smart and too cautious to take a risk like that.”

This, at last, seems to convince him, if only somewhat. He may not trust Mulder’s judgment, but he apparently trusts Scully’s, at least enough to finally sigh and say, “Okay. I hope you’re right.”

Despite Gibson’s reluctance, it takes almost no time at all to pack. They don’t have much to take, not bothering with spare clothes. Mulder shoves the stuff he printed about Mount Weather into his backpack, along with a little food, the fake IDs from the Gunmen and all of their remaining cash. They’re out the door and on the road in less than twenty minutes.

On the way to the train station, Mulder stops to gas up the motorcycle and buy four prepaid cell phones from the convenience store. Two hours later, as they’re getting ready to board the train that will take them eastward, Mulder types Scully’s number into the first phone and sends a single-word text message.

“Midnight.”

Once the message sends, he opens the back of the phone, pockets the battery, and tosses the phone in a garbage can.

[ironstrange1991]

Strange Love (Part 3)

Pairing: Doctor!Strange x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: Tony is concerned about the state of Y/N and decides to ask Doctor Strange for help. Gradually, something more than friendship begins to sprout from the relationship between the two.

Word Count: 5k

Warnings: Mentions of past traumas, slight angst

A/N: Sorry for taking so long to post this. If it's any consolation, know that the next five chapters are already written and I hope to start posting them weekly. (I won't promise, though) Let's see what happens.

Chapter 3: Whole Again

“She's not getting better”  Tony Stark was starting to get worried about you. It had been almost a month since the tragic events in the basement and since then you had barely gotten out of bed, had barely eaten, and had not spoken to anyone.

“Maybe she needs more time, Tony” Pepper said trying to be understanding “Look at everything that happened, it's traumatizing.”

“Where's Strange?” Natasha asked “No one has seen him since that day.”

Tony shrugged “Kamar-Taj. Looks like it's in Nepal. Said he need time to get to know himself now that he have absorbed the other Stranger's powers. Honestly, it sounds very much like a mid-life crisis”

“She and Loki...” Natasha didn’t finished

“I don't know. It is possible that they broke up.”

Tony did not approve your relationship with Loki, but the abrupt way you pushed him away after Doctor Strange's death worried him. Several times Loki had tried to talk to you, but you refused to see him.

"Maybe we should take her to a doctor," Pepper suggested. "Maybe a therapist, someone she could talk to."

“No therapist in the world will be able to talk to her about the things that happened” Tony said discouraged  “I saw it and I'm still trying to believe it”

“All this has been out of the media until now and we want to keep it that way. Talking about these things with anyone outside can be dangerous”  Natasha said apprehensively.

Tony wasn't surprised by the calculating way Romanoff looked at things, and he had to admit that she was right.

“I just want her to get better, but my hands are tied. I do not know what to do.”

  ...

The hours passed before your eyes forming days, weeks, a month...

The memories haunted you, you couldn't believe everything that had happened, you were sad, but it was a strange sadness, it was a bitter and dangerous thing.

You were sitting in an armchair watching the fireplace on, it was daytime but all the curtains were closed.

Someone knocked on the door and you jumped. The door opened, it was Tony.

“I'm loving the new decoration of this place” He said looking at the apartment “Low light, no air, broken glass... I liked it.”

You did not answer.

He approached you “You've been here for four weeks, it's starting to make me nervous” He looked at you, his eyes wide open  “I'm... terrified actually.”

You continued in silence.

“Listen... I can't say I understand what you're feeling... at most I can make a poor comparison with when half the universe was dusted and I lost important people for 5 years... I had to deal with all this pain, but I imagine it's not the same thing for you.

You stared at him with red, swollen eyes. He sat on the couch next to you.

“What I'm trying to say is that I've lost several times... you know that better than anyone, but... at some point we have to move on. You are alive and I am sure that right now you didn’t want to be, but you are. So please listen to me, you need to go back living.”

He sighed putting his head in his hands, his elbows on his knees “It's all so strange out there, everything is so quiet, I've barely been able to work... I... I'm very worried about you. Please y/n, you know I love you, right?”

You looked at him and tears were streaming down your face  “Tony...”

He hugged you and you collapsed on his shoulder in tears.

 “It's okay, put it out.” He let you cry until you calmed down and then he touched your face, pulling your hair behind your ears and stroking it. “It's going to be okay. I know it’s hard but I am here for you. Always.”

He managed to convince you to take a shower and brought food, you sat down at the table, but at the first bite your stomach turned and you pushed the plate away.

He watched you sitting at the other side of the table apprehensively “You didn't like it, ok, I can order something. How about pizza? It’s your favorite, isn’t it?”

You shook your head.

“You need to eat or you'll get sick, please y/n, I'm trying here.”

He gave up trying to get you to eat after a while. He wanted you to come down, but you could barely walk and you were always so tired.

He didn't argue anymore and took you to your room when he realized it was the only thing you wanted. You lay down hugging the pillow. He sighed and sat on the bed leaning against the headboard and pulled you onto his lap. He stroked your hair, touched your forehead a few times.

“You'll get better”  He said apprehensively more to himself than to you “I'll make you feel better.”

   ...

“She's burning with fever” Tony said worried “I don't know what to do.”

“Tony...” Pepper was apprehensive “Maybe its time to take her to see a doctor. Grieve its hard and painful but this… this isn’t only grieve, she is giving up”

Tony ran a hand over his tired face “I'll take care of it“ He said getting up.

"You're not thinking about doing what I think you're going to do," Pepper said in disbelief

“She needs a doctor, you just said!”

Tony knocked on the door of the Sanctum Sanctorum and it opened by itself.

"Strange" he called into the empty, silent hall.

“Stephen Strange is not here at the moment”  Wong replied “Can I help you, Stark?”

Tony ran a hand over his nervous face “Hi Wong, I... I need to talk to Strange, it's... important.”

“Have you tried his cell phone?”

“Funny that you have a sense of humor with that face. Listen, I don't have time for cell phones, I need Strange, NOW”.

A portal opened in the middle of the hall as Tony spoke and Stephen Strange entered  “Stark?”

“You see” Tony said teasing Wong “That's what I was talking about. Cell phone, how absurd!”

Wong walked away leaving the two of them alone.

“What do you need, Stark?”

“You look different”  Tony said making fun as he stalled “You look a bit.. strange.”

“I've heard that joke more times than I could tell and it never gets funny”.

"You'll have to admit it's funny." Tony turned on his heel.

Doctor Strange looked at him apprehensively “What do you need?”

“She's not getting better” Tony said darkly “She doesn't eat, she doesn't get out of bed. This morning she had a very high fever.. I don't know what to do.”

Strange stared at the floor sighing “Tony, I don't think I'm the best person to help her right now.”

“Yeah, I know... that face of yours won't help, but she needs someone who understands and she needs a doctor. You are both. Please… I can’t lose her”

Stephen sighed “I will see her tonight.”

Tony sighed relieved “Thank you, Doctor.”

   ...

You were lost in some dark dream and you couldn't wake up and it was cold, very cold and your whole body was shaking.

“The fever is very high. She won't wake up until we get her temperature back to normal.”

Stephen... you could hear his voice, but he wasn't there. It couldn't be him. Stephen Strange was dead. It was all so dark.

    ...

“The serum will help hydrate the body and the intravenous medication will take effect faster, normalizing her body temperature.”

Stephen Strange was staring at her unconscious on the bed. He couldn't help but feel guilty that he hadn't been able to resolve the situation without going to the extreme end it had.

 “What happened to her, Strange?” Stark asked.

Strange sighed “Trauma manifests itself in different ways. She's been through a lot lately.” Strange could see the exhaustion in Tony Stark. He could fall sick as well if he wasn't careful.

“You should rest, Stark. You need to." The doctor touched Tony's shoulder “Or you will get sick too.”

Tony looked at you lying unconscious.

“I'll stay with her. I can’t leave her alone” Tony insisted.

“I will take care of her. I won't leave her side. I promise”

Stark nodded with another worried look at her and left.

Strange stood at the window watching the night. Something inside him seemed to react to all this strangely. Since receiving his powers, he felt more dangerous, more irritable, it was almost as if together with them he had absorbed traits of the other Doctor Strange's personality and that scared him.

Now as he watched her sleep he noticed that he felt a strange warm in his chest. Feeling uncomfortable with the intensity of that feeling , he left the room leaving the door open and sat in an armchair in the living room.

Those things inside him stirred in response to his unease. He spent the night there, taking turns between the living room and the bedroom. He measured the temperature from time to time and sighed more calmly when he noticed that it began to drop.

It was after 3 am when she finally woke up. He continued to sit in the armchair, watching cautiously. Something inside him said it was a mistake that he was the first person she saw, but there was no other person besides him at her bedside.

   ...

You looked around the dark room and soon noticed something in your hand, a needle connected to an IV bag. You ran a hand over your face and struggled to sit up in bed, but your body didn't respond as you expected, so you saw him watching you from the armchair at the back of the room.

“Strange...is that you?”

He stood up and then you could see his face.

“You woke up. Stark was getting worried.”

Your  heart soared at the sound of his voice and you had to force yourself to understand that this was the Doctor Strange of your  universe. The Doctor Strange you was completely in love with was dead.

 “What happened?”   You asked and your voice cracked as reality hit and memories came to your mind.

He approached the bed “The high fever and severe dehydration made you shut down. You blacked out for hours.”

You nodded without taking your eyes off him. It was impossible to see him the same way now and extremely painful to accept reality.

“Are you feeling better? I can increase the serum so it will end faster.”

Was he there as your doctor? He got up fiddling with the IV and then went to the bed side table and got a stethoscope.

“I will… “ You flinched at his approach and he pretended not to notice. He listened for a while and you watched him. His eyes were deeper and with light circles under them, he looked tired.

“Your lungs are fine, normal heartbeat” He said looking at you awkwardly “It was probably just a malaise due to your fragile emotional state.

You forced yourself to sit up again and he helped you and then to your surprise, he sat down next to you on the bed.

“What happened to you? You disappeared”  You asked, your voice was hoarse.

“I'm fine, do not worry.”

The sound of his voice could still make you tremble, if you closed your eyes it was as if the other Strange was still beside you.

“What... did they do to him?”

“We buried him...” He looked away. “We had to use another name, but I insisted that he had a decent funeral.”

Your eyes filled with tears.

“It wasn't your fault. He was obsessed and corrupted by loss. No one could have saved him.”

“I could have saved him.”

“Giving up your life, and all the people who love you. Y/n, that would not be fair.”

You went silent.

“I also carry some guilt for what happened”.  He sighed “If there wasn't a Doctor Strange in this universe he could have stayed.”

You stared in surprise, You didn't imagine he felt that way “It doesn't make sense!”

“No, it doesn't, but we can't change the way we feel, can we?”

You closed your eyes, a tear running down your cheek.

 “You're gone.”

“I went to Kamar-Taj to seek... knowledge so to speak. I spend some time there”

“And did you find what you were looking for?”

He stared his own trembled hands “Not Enough.”

“He gave his powers to you. He was the most powerful Doctor Strange in the multiverse and don’t ask me how I know that, I just know, and right now that is you”

“I wish he had also delivered the knowledge he acquired over the centuries... I don't know what to do with all this.”

“You have to protect us, it's your job. I know that something big is coming and I thought it was him, but its not, is another thing. I think you need to put yourself together Doctor and protect our reality, our universe. May be that was the reason of this all”

He sighed nodding and Tony knocked on the door entering the room. Stephen got up and stepped away from the bed.

“Hi.”

“You woke up” He smiled approaching you “It's good to see you better.”

“I'm sorry... I didn't mean to worry you.”

“Worry? I wasn't worried. Did the Doctor think I was worried?”

Stephen smiled, that was so rare  “He was worried. He was desperated”

“Look, she's smiling, it's an evolution” Tony smiled relieved and you felt guilty for having made him go through all of that.

“She needs to rest” Strange said authoritative is his Doctor mode  “No leaving the house for the next few days. I'll prescribe a medication and a vitamin, soon you'll be feeling much better.”

“I thought you'd give her some kind of potion, you know, some wizard thing.” Tony teased

Doctor Strange walked away writing in a small notebook of recipes ignoring Tony and looked at you smiling “If you need me, you know where to find me.”

“I accompany you Doctor to…”

“It won't be necessary”  He opened a portal and went through it.

Tony stared in disbelief “This guy doesn't care about good manners of etiquette.”

“Tony...”

He sat down next to you and looked at you apprehensively.

“I'm sorry for everything that happened.”

“There is no need to apologize,  you weren't to blame for anything.”

You went silent and so was he. An anxious silence.

“I wasn't going to ask... but I can't stand it...”

“What?” You said without understanding what it was about.

“How did you do that? You not only got rid of Friday's commands, you took control of her functions... I was curious to say the least.”

You sighed, thinking that the best thing was to tell the whole truth”

“Before coming to NY I only had dreams and these sensations and sometimes I heard voices. It was how I knew about you, all of you.”

He nodded.

“Since I got here these skills seem to have expanded exponentially. First it was with Loki, I mentally called to him without even knowing what I was doing and then the visions started and now... I didn't know I could do it, I just did it.

"Telepathically you mean." He didn't seem to believe what he was hearing.

“Yeah. I... managed to access the AI ​​code with my mind. I managed to get into her programming and recalibrate her to respond to me as well.

He smiled seeming to find it all unbelievable “You hacked my AI with your mind... I shouldn't, but I'm proud.”

He made you chuckled. Only Tony could make that after everything.  It was amazing how Tony always managed to make you feel better.

“You saved my life” He said regretfully “I... don't know how to thank you.”

“Your life wouldn’t being in need of saving if I hadn't put everyone here at risk at first place.”

He sighed getting up “You see, that's what you do, you blame yourself for everything, for things that weren't your fault.”

“I should have gone with him..”

“And would you have left me?”  He said challenging you “You say you love me, that I'm everything to you, right? Wrong, because at the first opportunity you were going to walk away and leave me here.

Your eyes filled with tears “I'm sorry, I know I'm wrong... I... I love you Tony, I don't...”

He agreed “Apologies accepted. That said, I'm not going to accept this talk of fate anymore, you understand? We stay together, you and I, whoever wants to separate us is the enemy, do you understand that?”

You nodded and there you stayed cuddled in  your bed and you felt that there were nowhere else where you could be safer.

…

Two weeks have passed since the day Doctor Strange needed  to go to your rescue. He had visited you at other times as a doctor. It was always awkward situations, but you were grateful to him for all the support he gave you.

 You finally felt ready to get out of that apartment. You showered, changed, and went downstairs to the workshop where Tony was absently working. You missed your afternoons working together.

“Need help?”

He smiled.

You helped Tony repair the combat-damaged nanotechnology device. You both spent the whole afternoon there, talking and eventually the subject would have to come up.

“I haven't seen Loki since the last time he came here and you refused to talk to him. I was worried that something might have happened between the two of you.”

You sighed.

“You don't have to say anything if you don't want to, I know it's none of my business, I'm just... I'm worried about you, I'm walking on eggshells here.”

You sat on the floor turning the screwdriver that was in your hand

“He... well, I... asked him for some time. To think, to put everything in order in my head, your know”

Tony looked surprised “Some time, nice...very grown up of you. And what did he say?”

“He was upset, I think I hurt him. I haven't spoken to him since then. And I don’t think I will.”

Tony sighed “Ah this is... complicated. I imagine that as a prince he isn't used to losing. You know that guy wanted to rule an entire planet.”

“I don't... “ You hesitated a little to speak.

Tony walked over and sat on the floor next to you.

“After everything that happened with Strange, the way I felt for him... I don't think I could just erase it all and pretend that nothing happened.”

“Strange explained to me a little of this... thing that happened to you. What madness!”

“Yeah” You chuckled nervously “Everything's still here Tony. It's a little difficult to tell what's real and what's not. I couldn't go on with Loki while I was feeling this way. It wouldn't be right.”

He put his hand on your shoulder “You did the right thing. Stopping, thinking, putting everything in place before taking the next step.”

You shook your head “Then why do I still feel like I failed him?”

Tony looked at you regretfully “Loki will get over it. And soon you'll feel better and you'll be able to pick up where you left off.”  He grimaced  “It's so weird that you have a relationship with the guy who tried to kill me years a go”

You let out a small laugh and were surprised to still be able to laugh “It seems like an eternity ago. Things would be easier if our problem was still Loki trying to rule the planet”

Tony grinned, looked relieved, and again you felt bad for putting him through all that in the last few weeks. “You're right.” He got up and gave you his hand. “Enough of talking, let's get to work.”

…

That night Tony insisted that you should have dinner together. Rhodes was present and you talked normally about anything that didn't involve the tragic fight in the basement.

“I was with the Secretary of State yesterday” Rhodes began “He is adamant about the Accords.”

“Accords? The Sokovia Accords?” you asked confused.

“No” Tony replied “ The Sokovia accords is gone. This one is a little more... flexible so to speak.”

“The current accord requires all persons with special devices or abilities to identify themselves as such and respond to the government in cases of conflict.” Explained Rhodes.

You stiffened. "Doesn't seem so different from the other"

“Don't worry” Tony said to you immediately “Nobody knows about your... abilities and I intend to keep it that way.”

You agreed. Rhodes seemed to disagree. “She needs to be registered, Tony.”

“She won't fight, she doesn't need to.”

Rhodes sighed “What about the wizard?”

Your heart skipped a beat at the mention of Doctor Strange and you mentally scolded yourself. It needed to stop. He was someone else entirely. Well, not really. Things got a little messy inside your head.

“Sorcerer” Tony replied  “I think it's the correct term, I don't know.”

Pepper was silent, perhaps worried about the direction of the conversation. She kept looking at you like she was checking your reaction all the time.

“Ross wants him to register himself right away.”

“Oh he's going to love this” Tony put his hand on his face “Technically he was never part of the Avengers, so...”

“Tony it doesn't matter, everyone saw him fighting in NY. Everyone knows him.”

Tony sighed “I'll try to talk to him.”

“I think it's a big waste of everybody's time” You said without holding back. They stared at you. “The order of the Masters of Kamar-Taj protects this city, this planet, this dimension and universe long before the Avengers dreamed of joining. Doctor Strange will not agree to sign this... document. And he doesn’t have to, he is above it all.”

“Ross is not kidding...” Rhodes said preoccupied

“Will they try to force him?” You asked sounding more petulant than you intended. “Strange is not Rogers, they won't want to get in trouble with him.”

Tony rolled his eyes “Yeah, because now he is a super sorcerer with super magical powers”

“Tony, can you stop joking, this is a serious matter” Pepper asked annoyed. “ The idea was to have a calm and decent dinner and you both…” She stared to Tony and Rhodes “… are ruining it”

“Okay, no one will fight with anyone, I'll talk to him.” Tony promised

“And enough of this conversation.” Pepper demanded.

…

You were too restless to sleep and didn't want to be alone, but it was late at night.

Contrary to any notion of self-preservation, you slipped out of the tower and took a taxi to the nearest cemetery. Not all NY cemeteries was open at night, but some few were and you needed to find him, to say your last goodbye. You walked through the graves not knowing what you were looking for in the dark, but there was something in your mind pulling you forward so you knew you were in the right place and then you found him.

Stephen Strade. The headstone was new, the grass growing where the soil had been turned. It could be a coincidence, but something in your mind told you were in the right place.

You looked around at the empty cemetery illuminated only by the moon that was full and yellow that night. You sat there on the floor. The memories coming through your mind, all the times he swore he loved you and his melancholy apology.

Your heart overflowed with desperate sadness and you began to sob and you talked to him like he was still by your side.

“I'm sorry Stephen… I am so, so sorry.”

You were so distracted by your own crying that you didn’t hear someone approaching, it could be anyone.

“It's a little late to visit cemeteries, don't you think?”

You stared at Doctor Strange dressed casually in jeans, a gray tshirt, and a long-sleeved shirt on top.

“I could not sleep.” You said wiping the tears from your face.

He approached you  “Next time let me know and I can medicate you, I'm sure it's safer than walking around NY past 1am.

“I wanted to see him.”

“How did you know he’d be here?”

“I didn't know, but I... felt”

Strange agreed.

You got up, beating the sand off your clothes “It doesn't make much sense, does it? He is no longer here with us.”

Strange sighed closing his fists“I'm not so sure.”

You stared without understanding.

“Come on, I'll take you home.”

You hesitated. He seemed to understand and extended his hand to you “Come on”.

We entered the Sanctum Sanctorum and everything was quiet. The place was a little scary at night.

“May I offer you some tea?”

You agreed and he went ahead and you followed him. Arriving in the kitchen, you sat by the table. Strange used his magic to make tea and it was fascinating to watch him to do those things. He sat across from you handing you a cup.

You sipped and remained silent.

“Tony called me earlier today and said you got better, he seemed confident.”

You smiled nervously “ I've been trying to show that I'm fine in front of him, in fact I'm trying hard to get better for him.”

“Why?”

You went back to taking a sip of your tea “I don't want to worry him. Tony has a lot to worry about, I don't want him to worry about me too.”

“But he does, a lot. He likes you. You are very important to him.”

You smiled “And he is important to me”

Strange agreed, his both hands was crossed over the table “I never understood your relationship. What you are to each other. I know it’s none of my busyness”

You couldn't help but smile. Talking about Tony made you feel good “I love him. More than I ever loved any man. He is the great love of my life...”

Doctor Strange looked perplexed and you pretend you didn’t notice his confusion.

“... he's my father, my brother, an uncle, I don't know... Tony is all that and none of that at the same time, he's my best friend, the person I trust the most in this world.”

He smiled, trying to seem understandable, but he clearly doesn't understand what you were getting at with your answer. “I'm glad you found each other and that you feel that way about him.”

You agreed and he sipped his tea in silence and then as if he couldn't help himself, he asked “And Loki...”

You looked away.

“I'm sorry” He said embarrassed “I don't want to intrude, I just remembered that Tony mentioned that he hadn't seen him in a while and...”

“I haven't seen Loki in weeks, I needed some time.”

He sighed and you were wondering if it was a smile you saw on his face for a second.

He finished his tea “It's not hard to imagine his reaction. He is Loki after all”

“I hurt him, I'm not proud of it, but I think it was the best thing to do for now. I'm still very confused by everything that happened.”

He agreed.

"You seem to have come out of this a little better, assuming you're as good as you look."

“I'm not good at showing feelings.”  He said sighing “Or we can put it this way: I'm very good at not showing feelings.

You nodded understanding very well what he meant.

 “I spent a few weeks at Kamar-Taj. I read what I could about what seemed to suit my situation, but...”

You waited. Your tea long forgotten and cold.

“There is nothing in any book that explains what he did. However he did it, it has never been done in our universe until now.”

“Are you referring to when he gave his powers to you?”

He shook his head no “A simple transfer or drain spell. Highly dangerous, but simple. The question is this…”

He showed his hand and closed his eyes concentrating and in a second it turned into a tentacle right in front of you and his eyes turned red. He forced it back to normal getting embarrassed. “I don't know what this is. I can control it. I am really good at it and some masters told me this could be a valorous weapon against enemies, but I am afraid…”

You sat silently wondering whether or not to mention what you witnessed at the London Sanctum. In the end you decided it was best to be honest and tell what you knew. “In London, in the Sanctum, he fought this thing. I saw it.

“Did he defeat it?”

You denied “He absorbed it. It entered his body.” You sighed “He believed that these things died when he did that, but it seems that they became part of him, a living part inside of him. Suddenly you are not only one, your are a legion.”

Strange agreed “I would like to know how to get rid of it. It's been exhausting trying to keep these things under control.”

“He said it was a curse. I think you will have to learn how to live with it.”

Strange sighed and then changed the subject. “You told Loki what happened between you and...

“Almost everything.”

He was silent and you wondered why he insisted on talking about Loki.

“So you didn't say that...”

“That I slept with him? Yes, I did. That I fell in love with him? No, but fuck it, it doesn't matter anymore.”

To your complete surprise, he smirked. A cocky smirk “Hard to imagine those words coming out of your mouth.”

“You don't know me that well, Doctor”

“I would like to know.”

You were surprised and felt your face heat up. A tension enveloping you both. It made you uncomfortable and you felt the need to get up and step away.

“I think I better go. Tony might be worried.”

He got up too “Oh sure, we don't want to worry Tony Stark.”

You smiled a little sheepishly “Thanks for the tea and the conversation, Strange

“Come whenever you want, I like the company” He smiled “And please, call me Stephen.”

You agreed your cheeks a bit more red than before.

He opened a portal to your apartment.

“Good night, Stephen.”

The portal closed as you passed it and you stood there feeling something you wasn't quite sure what it was.

Reblog please! Leave a comment if you liked it. Interact! I will love to read all of your comments and opinions. It inspires me to keep writing!

BACK TO SERIES MASTERLIST

MAIN MASTERLIST

Tag list: @doctorstrangelovemusic-blog @rachelessfreedom-world @a-tong @ppatricia34me @strangesgirls @dreamxonxx @benaddictcumberpatch @iamsherlocked1479 @evelyn-kingsley @veryladyqueen @notglucose @wickedscribbles @agathassscribbles @rmoonstoner @fanartka @katehawke @nicoletk @azu21 @captaincarmel416 @harlekin6 @singhfae @coffedraven @withalittlehoney

@dontmindme262 @dementeddoll @yourmajesty13 @strangeions @bloodyflowerrr @insanelyobsessedwithdilfs @sherlocksgirl91 @dragonqueen89 @newtsniffles @cute-angi @whiskeyho @sherlux @xourownsidee @kakashibabe02 @hobimysolecito @geeky-politics-46 @lykaonimagines @d0ct0rstrangewife @classickook @iobsessoverfictionalmen @bobateadaydreams @aphroditesdilemma

@thealleydog @anadlockfan @pinkthick @loverofallbroken

[serial-serializednovelreader]

A Beginning at the End...

I made a post the other day about MBS getting cancelled and honestly that was just a quick vent post and didn't have much of my actual thoughts and feelings about what why I was so upset. So I want to tell a story about my history with the book and later adaptation, just so I can give it a bit of a sendoff and celebrate my love for the series as a whole.

To begin, I believe I'm neurodivergent in some way (undiagnosed for reasons I won't get into), so you can imagine that I wasn't very welcomed by many of my classmates. While it was a small class and I was close with them, I didn't feel that they really understood me. I often felt alone and found my home in books, as cliche as that sounds.

On a Friday in elementary school, a book on my teacher's shelf called The Mysterious Benedict Society caught my eye. I pulled it out and asked her if I could borrow it. She hesitated a bit before saying yes, as long as I promised to take care of it as it was a very special book to her. I, of course, agreed, not knowing how special it would become to me too.

I immediately began reading and fell in love with the world of the novel, finishing it within a weekend. I loved how clever Reynie was at solving the puzzles he was given, how Sticky rattled off facts like a machine, Kate's positivity and agility (I wanted to be her sooooo badly), and Constance's stubborn nature. And of course, the world-building, themes, and overall plot were superb.

But most of all, it was the kid characters I loved, because I felt they were like me in some way (the neurodivergent coding makes a lot of sense now!!), that if I knew them in real life they would be friends with me. And this only increased when I read the rest of the series. The only unfortunate part is that almost everyone I knew had never heard of these books, let alone read them. The few who actually did I didn't get to stay in touch with due to outside circumstances.

Over the years, I've reread the series several times and I still can't get over just how GOOD this book series is. First off, they're funny. There are so many good moments where I STILL laugh, no matter how many times I've read them. The characters are well-thought out and the main four kids are dynamic characters; they each have a realistic and clear arc over the course of each book (which I hope to make a post about someday!). Book Curtain is a bit of a cartoon villain I'll admit, but his funny moments add to the charm and is still a credible threat as a villain. The themes are interesting, and understandable for kids while being even more hard-hitting for adults. The plot structures are fun and while a bit predictable definitely keep you on your toes.

So in 2019, when I found out that the fourth book, The Riddle of Ages, was releasing I was SO excited and of course bought a copy as soon as I could. It was really emotional for me, as it showed the characters aged up and coming to terms with growing up and what that could mean for their friendship. I needed it, especially with the transitional period I was going through at the time.

Around that time, another bombshell dropped: it was actually getting a TV show adaptation (on Hulu at the time)!!! This was a dream come true for me, who had imagined it so many times (and had actually wanted to play Kate lol). I was a bit wary of what they would do with the characters, but honestly I was just happy it was getting an adaptation at all. That at least some people knew about it and wanted to see it come to life.

When it finally came out on Disney Plus, I watched it every week like clockwork. I loved both seasons and how much detail they put into it. While the show changed a lot of things from the book series, I actually loved what they did with it. Kate's arc of not wanting to be a team player is even more prominent from the beginning, Show Curtain, SQ being Curtain's adopted son, I could go on, but those are just *chef's kiss* 👌👌. More than that I could just feel the LOVE that went into the show from the actors, writers...just everyone!! Even the choices I didn't like still worked for me just because I could tell how much care was put into the series. The community on here shared the love even more through posts, fanfiction, art, etc. Finally I felt like I had validation for the series I loved so much and that people were seeing how great it was!

Then I found out it wasn't being renewed for a third season... and it hurt a lot. I felt (and still feel) that it's just another example of a streaming site looking over the quality of the show for pure numbers. What has helped is the MBS blogs I follow/lurk around (shoutout to y'all <3 I know I need to engage more) and the actors of the kid characters, who have all spoken out about how they're sad it's ended but also enjoyed the journey and love the time they had with getting to play the characters, which cheered me up a lot.

So in the end, I'm still upset the show was cancelled. And I'm still holding out hope that maybe it'll get renewed somehow, or picked up by another studio. But no matter what, it'll never take away the love I have for the book and TV series and the community surrounding it, so I'm glad I'll always be able to celebrate that.

TL:DR: I have a lot of history with the original book series and while I'm still sad about the show ending, the love I have for the MBS series as a whole and the community surrounding it won't go away. I'm happy there was an adaptation that got so much love from everyone involved and that people got to enjoy it.

[leporschespam]

Getting to Know Your BL Mutuals

rules: answer the questions and tag some people. include the tag ‘g2ky BL mutuals 2022’ on your post so we can find everyone’s answer. 

(optional ofc <33)

i was tagged by @braceletofteeth <33 thank you!!

wow this got really long,, good luck yall

What were the BLs that took you by surprise last year? 

i won't lie, i wasn't surprised that i enjoyed kinnporsche, but to the extent that i did (and of course still do), that was kinda surprising. they had me paying to watch a livestream of gay™ the musical, and i'm not even mad. it was my first thai bl, so, oh lord, my standards were raised.

last twilight in phuket - controversial, but i think i prefer it to i told sunset about you (though itsay is so so good). i didn't know 13.43 mins could make me feel so much, but there we are, and i'm very happy to be in that situation.

What were the BLs that you felt a bit disappointed with last year? 

oh i have some very controversial opinions on this–

- there's one that everyone really loves that i didn't finish, thought it was trying to be bigger than what it was (if that makes sense), and just found it really... boring. it got to one plot line and i'd had enough– though i'm willing to give it a re-try because, granted, i was in a kinnporsche mourning period when it came out. im not even gonna name it because i swear everyone i follow loves it (welp-)

- to my star

again, controversial, but i haven't seen this being talked about as much as the last one. i haven't seen s2, but oh my god, i'm sorry but i was so bored, and this was before kinnporsche so my standards weren't even insanely high, yeahhh

- blueming

it wasn't *bad*, but the way everyone hyped up made me think it was gonna be something really special, yeah i was definitely disappointed

- cutie pie

didn't finish. arranged marriage is never my favourite, but i'd heard so many people say how good it was, and sometimes you have to trust the crowd. i didn't find that here. i may well re-try it, along with the unnamed show further up, but yeahhhh. best part was perth, and he genuinely might be the only reason i try it again.

What was your favourite BL last year? 

unsurprisingly, kinnporsche :)

i'd been without a favourite show for a little while, which is so so unlike me. i tend to need something to consume me and kinnporsche just did that. first ep and holy fucking shit, *that* is what i'm talking about. i hadn't actually heard of it until an edit came up on instagram, and i instantly downloaded iqiyi, found ep 1 and 2 were out, binged those, and fell in love really

when i say it became my favourite show just from the first episode, i truly mean that. it was the biggest power move of a first episode and ughdhdh perfect <33

i've tried (and will continue to try) to convince my mates to watch it. i have been successful once with the whole show. a few of my mates just know vegaspete as KFCock, but yknow a win is a win, they are aware of their existence, which i'll gladly take.

Favourite BL/GL couples (not just of 2022) 

grouped by show/film~

kinn and porsche (kinnporsche)

vegas and pete (kinnporsche)

kim and chay (kinnporsche)

arm and pol (kinnporsche - they're canon idc)

chan and big (kinnporsche - also canon, you cannot convince me otherwise)

moon-jo and jong-woo (strangers from hell - absolutely canon)

oh-aew and teh (i told sunset about you – but not after ep 3 of i promised you the moon, nawww i'm so mad)

art and golf (till the world ends)

joke and long (till the world ends)

sam and mon (gap)

arisa and ying (the stranded)

nat and gun (the stranded)

jack and krit (the stranded)

jia-han and birdy (your name engraved herein)

kuina and ann (alice in borderland)

jae-young and sang-woo (semantic error)

tae-sung and hae-bom (cherry blossoms after winter)

park and pong (big dragon – i've watched 4 eps, i'm staying for them and them only. yai and mangkorn? no- park and pong? fuck yeah!! i haven't finished it yet, i'm doing one ep per night, so four more to go. i'm surprised it's getting a season 2, but i'll take it for park and pong instead of the main two ✋️✋️)

that was long– anyway it turns out i definitely need more gl recs, which i expected, but yeah, please gimme recs

If you had to suggest a BL for someone, what would it be? 

allow me to suggest a few~~

kinnporsche

- mafia, but *sometimes* make it wholesome. and then add a hearty dose of PAIN. perfect :D,, i know i've already said it, but i'll say it again it's consumed me, and i'm so grateful. i had some of the worst exams when it was coming out, and kinnporsche genuinely got me through each week, kept me smiling, made everything just a bit more bearable, and i am forever grateful for that.

strangers from hell

- what do you mean it's not a bl. of course it is. whatever moon-jo and jong-woo have going on is most definitely *not* heterosexual. also there was way more chemistry between those two than jong-woo and ji-eun. if you're looking for a comfort psychological thriller, this is it :D - i mean it's the most wholesome show i've ever watched, just two guys bonding over shared interests and falling in love (aww)

till the world ends

- on my knees begging someone to watch it– it's really pretty, made me cry, from a very small film company and eee i love it

i told sunset about you (& last twilight in phuket)

- so so aesthetic and pretty and ughfhhf– last twilight in phuket is maybe one of the prettiest thing i've seen. itsay is also so so pretty. HOWEVER, for the sake of your own sanity, don't watch i promised you the moon. i mean ep 1 is really good, but after ep 3 and maybe ep 2? hell naw

semantic error

- this may have been my first bl? idk, anyway, it'll forever have a soft spot in my heart, it's wholesome enemies to lovers 😌😌 also i'll say series > film – the film is literally 3 hours long, which i wasn't prepared for so that's kinda on me, but yeah

cherry blossoms after winter

- i had shitty mocks when this came out and it made every thursday so much better. it's really wholesome and very much screams comfort.

the stranded

not explicitly a bl, however there's one canon mlm couple, another borderline canon mlm ship, and basically canon lesbians. it's kinda like a thai teen version of lost (idk if any of yall have seen that) but yeah :)

What was your non-BL favourite last year? 

oooooooh~~

i think it's gonna have to be happiness

mwah, beautiful, stunning — childhood friends with unrequited love to fake marriage to found family to requited love, and zombies like that is the SHIT!!

south korea just owns zombies honestly, because everything i've seen is so good, even the not so well rated ones (this,, train to busan, all of us are, #alive - to some extent)

other mentions 😌😌

:: little women (the kdrama) is another elite show, highly highly recommend it. my trust levels went all over the place during it, but hell yeah

though i do feel robbed about a certain ship. not even a hug :|

:: money heist korea is another one!

forgive me for not having watched the original,, but anyway i've heard that tokyo's really annoying in the original which sucks :/ oH nairobi is bi, because i said so

the end~

tagging (ofc optional <3)

@songtaegguk @achilleanskops @badboyvegas @kinnporsche-n-chill @subtextsays

[bradtomlovesya]

Ⓦⓗⓔⓝ ⓣⓗⓔ ⓢⓗⓞⓦ ⓔⓝⓓⓢ (Part 1)

Summary: After seeing Brad using that red shirt on that concert you become oddly horny. (I suck at summary, sorry)

Clarifications: This is part 1, Part 2 will be posted tomorrow.

Thank you for the idea, baby @brad-is-my-dante Ily <3

Warnings: Smut +18, dom!Brad x sub!reader, Spit kink, Unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), English is not my first language.

Word counter: 2k +

We were in the car going to the hotel. The first concert of the tour had started and Brad was more than happy about it and so was I. I really wanted to hug him and hold his hand as normal but I had to keep my distance the rest of the way or I would end up sucking his dick right now without caring about the driver or anything else.

That perfect red button-down shirt only made the moisture in the middle of my legs grow more and more. I wanted it, I really needed to get to the hotel room and make him fuck me like only he knew how.

“Are you okay? You haven't said something all the way” he said, getting me out of my thoughts.

“I'm fine, I'm just a little distracted, sorry” I responded with my gaze on the car window. Couldn't we get there faster?

“Okay…” He answered not very convinced.

The rest of the way was complete torture, I could only feel my desire growing and growing every time he breathed or moved his legs and let me see his perfect cock marked in his pants. Got damn! I could swear that I had never been so wet in all my life as I was now.

The moment we entered the hotel room and he closed the door, he couldn't hold back and chose to speak.

“All right, tell me what's up? You've been distracted since the concert ended and I'm worried, did something happen and you don't want to tell me? Didn't you like the concert? Believe me I can handle the criticism but I really thought you liked it”. He said as he pried more buttons off his shirt and pulled them out from inside his pants.

I swallowed hard and took my gaze off from the bare part of his torso "I-It's not th-that" I stuttered.

“What is it then?” He crossed his arms and his muscles were perfectly marked on his shirt. Some veins on his arms stood out and his scowl only made him look sexier.

“I can't take it anymore, sorry.” I ran my hands through my hair. “But this is your fault for wearing those pants, that red shirt, and those fucking rings. Fuck! your fingers.” I complained. “I've been distracted because I was trying not to give in to my urges but my panties are already too wet so could you please fuck me at once?”

The brown boy was only silent for a moment and then he laughed out loud. "It was that?" He asked. "You made me worried, Y/n! I thought you wanted to break up with me or something and apparently you just wanted sex." He laughed in denial. "Tell me what you want" he approached me "Tell me what you want and I will do it." He murmured with his lips brushing my cheek.

“Sorry, but seriously it's your fault for being so fucking sexy”. I felt his hands on my waist and my legs shook, I had never been so desperate. “I want your dick in my mouth, please.” His lips kissed my neck. “Please.” I repeated pleadingly.

“It's okay sweetheart. If you want to do it so much…” He acted difficult. “Sure you can.” He brought his hands up to his belt and slowly took it off, lowered his pants and directed her gaze to mine. His eyes were full of desire. "Come here" He held his member over his boxer shorts. "On your knees.” He demanded.

“On my knees” I nod and he puts a sofa cushion on the floor so my knees wouldn't hurt and I kneel in front of him.

“Go ahead, all yours.” He brought his hands to my hair and pulled it up so I was looking into his eyes. “I know we're both going to enjoy this, Y/n.” He said my name slowly and that only made me warmer.

I wasted no more time. I pulled his boxer down and his hard erection hit his stomach. There was some pre-cum that made me lick my lips as I watched him. I took his member in my hand and went up and up and down slowly while running my tongue over the tip. It tasted salty but coming from him, I loved everything.

“Damn, princess! That pretty mouth really knows how to do its job.” His face contorted with pleasure and his mouth parted as he felt my tongue on the tip of his penis. “Open your mouth.” He said seriously. I obeyed and closed my eyes waiting for him to introduce his big member into my mouth but that never happened. A hoarse laugh in his throat made me open my eyes again. “Did you expect my member? No, darling. If you want to, you will have to do it yourself.” He lowered his head and spat into my mouth. “Swallow.”

“Thanks.” I mumbled as soon as I swallowed her saliva.

“What did you say?” He asked with a frown.

“Thank you, sir” I corrected immediately and bit my lip. “Can I go back to work?” My pussy lips felt completely wet and sticky, there was no way I could stop it and I didn't plan on doing it. I was finally going to have what I was waiting for all night.

“Yes, sweetie. You can continue.” He nodded with a beautiful smile. I took his member again in my hands and this time I put it in my mouth taking what I could more. At least what my gag reflection allowed me. “Fuck!” He moaned loudly. "That's it, that's my girl.” He spoke between gasps with his head thrown back in pleasure.

I went up and down my hand with a cautious speed and used my saliva as a lubricant to make it easier. I thrust his cock down my throat and moved up and down deeply until I felt the need to breathe. I pulled it out of my mouth with a pop sound and a trickle of saliva still connecting us.

“Oh... Babe”. He sighed. “You look so innocent all the time in front of my friends and family. Everyone could swear that you are a total and complete angel”. He held my face by my chin with his thumb and forefinger. “And the truth is that you are an angel with the wishes of a demon. You make me sin but you make me touch the sky, isn't it strange?” He bit his lip. “Now be a good girl and open your mouth so daddy can fuck that pretty throat of yours.”

I opened my mouth and his member slammed into my throat making me have a gag reflex but I controlled it. My lashes bathed wet from my tears as I watched the muscles in his abdomen contract due to the force He was doing. The buttons he had unhooked gave me a perfect view of his god-sculpted abdomen. His eyes were closed and tight as he continued saying obscenities and fucking my mouth like there was no tomorrow. His veins pulsed and his dick felt harder than before so I assumed he was going to come and he did. He hit the back of my throat and painted everything with his cum. I waited for him to finish and swallowed it all so as not to waste anything. Also, I wiped his cock with my tongue and when he pulled it out of my mouth with a loud growl, I put my hands on the ground to breathe and steady myself.

“Are you tired?” He asked me with his heavy breathing and now his eyes looking directly at me.

“A bit.” I muttered. “But I'm fine.” I smiled with my eyes on his.

“Good because I'm not done yet.” He smiled and reached down to gently take me by the arms and lay me down on the bed. “Do you think you can handle it?” he asked as he kissed my neck and took bites.

“Yes, I can.” I gasped when he positioned himself between my legs and squeezed my butt tightly pulling me towards him. His hands lifted my dress and yanked my underwear off. “Bradley!” I looked at him with wide eyes.

“I'll buy you new underwear, I promise.” He murmured her with his face tucked between my legs and kissing the inner part of my thighs. “Love, I've never seen you so wet.” He spread my legs and ran his tongue between my folds in a slow way to collect as much of my fluids as he could.

My hands instinctively went to his hair to tug at it and my back arched in pleasure. His fingers found my entrance but they did not enter. He patted the area with four of his fingers and two of these he moved around the entrance.

“Bradley, stop teasing…” I moaned loudly when his thumb pressed my clit and he began to draw circles on it, keeping enough pressure to make me see stars and wanting to close my legs but he pressed them with his free hand to avoid it. The cold from his rings was felt throughout my core and many moans escaped my lips.

“I love the sound of your moans, especially when I'm the one causing them.” He slipped two of his fingers into my vagina and bent them a little to touch my G-spot.

“Fucking hell! Bradley..”. I moaned his name and closed my eyes. One more finger slid easily into my femininity thanks to how wet it was. His fingers moved fast and hit every point that made me moan and feel like an orgasm was forming in the lower part of my stomach. My forehead was sweaty and my hands were tugging at his hair getting several grunts and moans from his part that sent vibrations right to my center. One of his hands went up to one of my breasts and squeezed it with a little force causing me another loud moan and that my nipples went hard under the fabric of my dress. “Don't stop, never stop!” I cried

“I won't, baby” he murmured, licking and sucking on my pussy. His fingers were soon replaced by his tongue moving in and out of me quickly and deliciously.

Once again two of his fingers entered and moved roughly inside me. Her tongue squeezed and sucked on my clit and her other hand squeezed my other breast. That was the last thing I needed to cum on her lips with a loud moan of his name.

My vision turned white, my eyes slammed shut and my legs shook like Jelly. I held my breath for a few seconds trying to normalize it but it wasn't long because I felt something slide into my vagina all of a sudden making me moan even louder due to the over stimulation.

“I'm sorry my love. But I had to go in now or I would end again but this time on the room floor thanks to your exquisite moans.” He held still as I got used to his length.

His hands were on my waist and lifted my body so that his cock could fully enter me and contort my walls as only he knew how to do it. "You can move." I fixed my eyes on his.

"Finally!" He groaned, digging his fingers into my hips and starting to move with slow but rough speed. He came out halfway and entered me completely again in one fell swoop. "This cunt belongs to me and absolutely no one can make you feel as..." A heavy thrust. "As good as I do!" He exclaimed as the speed of his thrusts increased. "Take off that dress, please" he begged me with parted lips.

I took my hands to the buttons of my dress and took them off and then pulled it over my head. I also unzipped my bra and his eyes immediately went to my breasts. His eyes were pure pupils, they were completely filled with lust.

He lifted my legs over his shoulders and managed to go even deeper with each thrust. He lowered his face to my height and kissed my lips with pure love and ferocity. "Fuck! You don't know how much I love you!" He hid his face in my neck and sucked on my skin leaving a hickey that would be visible later.

"I love you too!" I exclaimed. At that moment I was a sweaty, moaning mess. I changed our positions so that he was under me. I inserted his member into my wet cunt and jumped over and over again, inserting his member into me just the way I liked it.

"Shit shit shit! Y/n!" He dug his fingers into my ass hard and covered my walls with his cum. It didn't take me too long to reach my ecstasy and I ended up on his cock doing a mixture of our cumshots.

"This was a thousand times better than I expected" I mentioned with my face hidden in the crock of his neck and his collarbone. "I didn't remember you were that huge!" I giggled.

"You have a bad memory then" He teased and kissed my head. He came out of my vagina and went for wet towels to clean us up.

Once we were clean, we crawled under the covers completely naked.

"I'll have to wear that red shirt more often. I like the effect it has on you." He put a lock of my hair behind my ear and kissed my lips sweetly.

"I'm Y/n and I approve of this message" I teased and bit his lip. I closed my eyes and it didn't take long for me to fall asleep. I love that red shirt, I really do.

[0aurelion-sol0]

So, a bit of an update:

- I've promised a lot of posts (mainly ST posts I'm talking about here, the reviews of various things, for now, are completely abandoned) over the course of this blog yet I have never posted them after that. As you may know or may not know, I have lots of thoughts but so little time and energy to get into it given what happens in my IRL life all the time. I have tried to finish those before certain things started going and certain points of time before but I just never could finish them in time or get myself to do it. So I decided to regroup into one big post everything that I am not going to say and wants to say. I am not going to tell you when it'll drop because, again, I likely won't drop in time. Just know, I'm still working on it but between not liking what I write, the way I write it & not having enough time and energy, it is taking longer than it should be...

*(There will however be a four-part theory posts that I needed to, to develop better what I had in mind. Again not telling when I'll post it but I'm still working on it.)

- Also the fact I disliked a huge part of the story as of late and what this side of the fandom has become, it's hard being 100% invested in what I do for this particular series but it has been the meat of this blog, for almost 3 years now, and I have met lots of wondeful people here that I still love talking to everyday when we can so I'm in a way still compelled with it for the moment as you see. Especially since there's only one season left that could change everything I think about it, make it go back to what I thought it was or stick to what I'm thinking it is now.

- Anyway, I still intend to take a break from social media including Tumblr, (to a lesser degree since I still want to reblog and post stuff I find interesting from time to time & share some thoughts), which started with me deleting various social medias I had over the few months I was less things & do other things than ST plus IRL. I need it for myself, especially to grow, mature and learn.

- I also intended for this blog to be more organized but as you see, I haven't been able to make it work the way I wanted it to. Again, it's still something I want to do so as of now, less batshit, reblog stuff all the time or post stupid stuff just to fill some tags on Tumblr (which I also hope I'll get better at it). It's like a new year resolution that's a little late with many others I need to follow but I really need to follow them and make some efforts myself or it won't work.

- And to finish, let's change the way this blog look since it's been a long time and keep it this way for also a long time. X) I hope you'll like it! Hoping it works and stay that way because Tumblr just always finds a way to f*ck it up somehow...

We will see after that what I'll try to do and what I want to do but until then, this is what we are aiming for; which is already a lot for me. XD

[astraphel]

WIP Roll Call | 7.10.21

I’ve gotten a few new followers after @httptamaki​ shared my fic, so I want to give a list and brief descriptions of some of the fics I’m working on right now! I can’t promise a timeline or word count, all of these will be as long as they need to be.

Also, all of these stories are subject to change. The pairings will stay the same, but the ways to get there might change :)

Attack on Titan

Levi x GN!Reader

I forgot about this one! I have five full pages of notes for a vast overarching story involving Levi meeting someone during the four years they're investigating Marley. Honestly, I'm excited to revisit it!! I wouldn't say this is imminent by any means, but it's my most fleshed-out long fic idea at the moment. All I will say is that the Reader will be a bookstore owner in Marley. I will include smut, but the story won't revolve around it.

Avatar: The Last Airbender

Hama Fic (Unnamed)

So, in my opinion, the way they wrote Hama as a villain did her dirty. So, I'm writing a fic where she gets brought home to live her twilight years in the place she was taken from, that she gave up everything to protect. This story will take a lot to write because I want her progression to be realistic. I'm indigenous and have elders who survived residential schools. I'm also looking at Holocaust survivors who sought indiscriminate vengeance after the war ended. It'll be a very angsty story because fanfic lets folks explore the more gritty things that studios like Nickelodeon can't. Hama's story is a part of that, for me.

Demon Slayer

Haganezuka Hotaru x GN!Reader

Notes I have for this one have a scenario where you live in the swordsmith village but earn your keep by making pottery for people to use and sell. Since you and Haganezuka are both busy with your crafts, you have a more spontaneous arrangement.

Uzui Tengen x Wives x GN!Reader

Another shameless self-insert. I love fics that include Tengen's wives! You get caught in a storm and need to take refuge at their estate, which was the nearest safe place you could find. The storm will be devastating, requiring you to stay longer than you anticipated. Shenanigans unfold as you slowly realize they have a lifestyle that you've never seen before...but are intrigued by.

Legend of Korra

Sozin's Comet's Return

I've been thinking about and planning this fic for like two years. It's set 30 years after the end of Korra, making her about 40 when the comet returns. It'll be a gen fic about an event with some intrigue, but mostly I want to have fun with worldbuilding and think about how things have changed 30 years after the portals opened. One point of inspiration I'm taking for this is that I was a small child when we got the internet at home, and now in my 30's, it's in every aspect of our daily lives. So, I'm considering ways to show how the portal being open has changed the region decades after.

Mob Psycho 100

Serizawa Katsuya x GN!Reader

There aren't many Mob Psycho 100 characters I want to write for, but Serizawa makes the cut! I am trying out Plottr with this one, using their mystery outline to see how it feels to use tools like that for writing. I want to have a romance plot with the Reader and Serizawa, but it won't be the only point of interest. There's not a lot hashed out yet, but I know I want Serizawa to lose his virginity to the Reader.

My Hero Academia

Aizawa x Trans!Hizashi x GN!Reader

A steamy one-shot with Erasermic. I've been thinking of what I want to do with these two. Y'all realize your feelings, and things progress from there. I might do some poly dynamic vibes or introduce the idea. Depending on how much fun I have with it, it might either be a long fic or multi-chapter. No promises!

Chimera Eros: Chapter 3

(Amajiki Tamaki x GN!Reader)

The next iteration of the Chimera Eros series, I just finished the outline for the chapter, and it's gonna be a fun one :) More soft sweet praise from the Reader and cute subby Amajiki, as usual.

Sub!Hawks x GN!Reader

I've posted about this before, and I have a complete outline for it. You and Hawks have a scene you like to play out when you find the time. The Reader has a somnophilia kink, so you challenge Hawks' stealth skills to creampie you in your sleep. If he wakes you up, there will be punishment - and you're a light sleeper.

Outlaw Star

Aisha Clan-Clan x Sub!GN!Reader

A dom/sub scenario where Aisha controls who you sleep with and makes special requests of you while you do it (such as bringing her creampies when she finds a suitable human). Aisha is the namesake of this blog, so I want to do her justice in anything I write for her!

Yu Yu Hakusho

Botan x Keiko x Yusuke

I have a whole page of filthy notes for this one, and I honestly forgot about it until today, LOL. Botan and Keiko have some fun while Yusuke is away, and both feel guilty and confess. After some contemplation, he presents an idea for them to make it up to him. This will be ABSOLUTE FILTH.

Jin x Toya x AFAB!Reader

This one is also a one-shot idea. These are a couple of my favorite good boys from Yu Yu Hakusho, so I want to give them some love!! I would like for the Reader to get DP'd by them, so I'll go with F or AFAB rather than GN for this.

Kurama Horror Fic (Unnamed)

This is one I've posted about on here before. Still, I want to write a horror story involving Kurama's relationship with his mother. Excerpts from other posts about it:

"My concept is...what if Kurama wasn't supposed to save his mom? We know with Yusuke there's a sense of "you're not supposed to be dead yet," in Spirit World, which leads to the series starting. Everyone has their time to go."

I want things to get to a point where Shiori finds out about who Kurama is in a way that he can't control, and they both struggle with the realization. It's a horror, so I'm not going to lean into the way she was characterized in the show, tbh. Not in the sense of it being a crackfic, but just...considering realistic reactions to learning something so abstract about your own child.

[helloalycia]

worth the wait [two] // daisy johnson

summary: same as the first chapter – it was too long to post in one so this is the remainder of it!

part one | part three | part four | part five | part six | masterlist | wattpad

"What do you think?"

I raised an eyebrow as I poked my head inside the van, glancing around at the cramped space that had stupidly been turned into a living space. There was also, weirdly enough, a computer in the corner which made absolutely no sense.

"I think I have no idea what I'm looking at," I admitted, before looking to an excited Skye beside me. "What is this?"

She bit her lip to contain her grin as she patted the van's door proudly. "This is my new rig."

I almost laughed. "You're kidding."

Her smile lessened. "I'm not."

Now I definitely laughed. "Skye, c'mon, be serious. Whose van is this?"

Her smile disappeared as she clenched her jaw with annoyance. "It's mine. Sorry it isn't fancy enough for you, your majesty."

When I realised she was serious, I lost my smile and looked between the van and her. "Skye, where the hell did you get a van? You can't even drive!"

Clearly holding in her anger, she began to push past me and slide the doors shut. "He said you wouldn't get it," she mumbled to herself, but I heard.

"He?" I questioned with raised eyebrows. "Who the hell is he?"

"Miles," she snapped, stopping moving and looking to me. "Miles is the one who got me the van. He said it was a bad idea to show you and clearly he was right, Y/N. You took one look at it and laughed. He was right."

I smiled tightly, trying not to get worked up at the mention of Skye's new friend. She'd befriended this 'Miles' guy within the past few months and wouldn't stop meeting with him and his friends. He was in the grade above us, but just like her, he'd skip class and do God knows what.

Ever since she'd been hanging around them, she'd been standoffish and distant. She wouldn't contact me as much when she ran away, and she'd been skipping school more often than usual. They were clearly a bad influence on her, but she reassured me she was in control of her own life and knew what she was doing. Being the idiot I am, I fell for her pretty smile and convincing eyes, but this was getting too far now.

"No offence, Skye, but I wouldn't start listening to a guy who can't even make it to class on time," I said to her with a hint of annoyance. "Why do you need a van anyway?"

"Why not?" she countered with her arms crossed. "I thought you'd be happy that I'm finally taking responsibility. Growing up."

My expression softened. "I've never once said that you had to do either of those things."

"You don't need to say it," she mumbled, looking down at her shoes with a frown. "I know you think it. Everyone does."

I stepped forward, resting a hand on her shoulder and finding her eyes with mine. "Where is this coming from? Skye, I have never thought that. All I've ever wanted for you is to be safe and happy. I'm just worried."

She shrugged me off. "Well, now you don't need to be. I've got this."

"You're seventeen, you should be in school studying, not staying in a van," I said tiredly. "You've been missing so much. How are you gonna graduate?"

She avoided my eyes. "That's another thing... I've been thinking and, well, I don't think I want that."

I widened my eyes with disbelief. "What?"

Still avoiding my eyes, she continued, "I don't think I want to graduate."

I was too surprised to find words so quickly. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"How can you not want to graduate?!" I asked suddenly, finding my words. "It's what you do! It's what we all do!"

She met my eyes with apologetic ones. "It's what you do, Y/N. I don't want to be at a place that makes me feel like shit. I can't keep pretending I fit in when I don't."

"This isn't you," I told her sternly. "We were supposed to graduate together. You're not stupid, Skye. I can help you study. You can't just give up."

"I'm not," she said with certainty. "I finally know what I'm doing. That's all."

I squeezed my fists together to contain my frustration. "And what's that?"

"The Rising Tide–"

"For fuck's sake!" I cut her off, before hitting the van door with frustration.

"Miles has taught me a lot!" she defended. "They do a lot of good, Y/N! I just want to be apart of something bigger. Something that can help me help others. And something that can help me find my family. My real family."

I clenched my jaw, knowing I was too late in convincing her otherwise. Whatever Miles and the others had told her about their stupid hacking group had worked – she was dropping out of high school and there was nothing I could do to stop her.

"You're gonna be going to university and we both know I can't afford it," she said gently. "We couldn't stay together forever, Y/N. And my foster family definitely don't care what happens to me. I don't fit in anywhere."

I looked to her with glassy eyes. "You fit in with me. You always have."

She pursed her lips as she stayed quiet.

"I'm sorry I didn't make that clear enough," I added bitterly.

"That's not it and you know it," she muttered, shaking her head. "I have to do this. I have to figure myself out. Alone."

I felt stupid for letting her do everything she did leading up to this point. If I had just tried a little harder, maybe things could have been different.

"You're not alone though, are you?" I asked rhetorically. "You've got your new pals at the Rising Tide. It's their damn fault you're doing all this."

"They're not as bad as you think!"

"You've changed because of them!" I argued back. "They created a barrier between you and I. It's because of them that you've... that you've..."

"What?" she snapped, glaring at me. "That I'm finally thinking for myself?!"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and straightened up. "Forget it, just– forget it. I've got a midterm to study for."

She snickered harshly. "Of course. Don't want me slowing you down."

I stayed quiet and turned around to leave. I couldn't see past my anger as I left her with her stupid van. 

Of course, the two of us had been friends for a lot longer than that silly argument, so I was quick to realise how much I actually cared about her and her life, and wanted to apologise for how harsh and unsupportive I sounded.

The next day after school, I decided to head over to her foster family's place to hopefully talk to her. I'd had enough time to think about it and knew I was a lot more levelheaded now that I'd had some space.

I knocked on the front door and waited before an older blonde woman answered. I recognised her as Skye's foster mum, Sally.

"Hi, Mrs Collins," I greeted with a smile. "I'm looking for–”

"Mary doesn't live here anymore," Sally cut me off instantly, surprising me.

I had almost forgotten that Skye's foster family knew her as the name she was given by her orphanage – Mary Sue Poots.

"She doesn't?" I asked with confusion. "But I thought–"

"Goodbye, Miss Y/L/N," Sally interrupted, before slamming the door in my face.

I blinked with confusion before turning around and walking down the steps. It had been a while since I last visited Skye at home. In fact, she made sure I never visited her at home. I guess now I knew why. But then where the hell was she living?

As I walked around the neighbourhood trying to think about where Skye could be, I saw a familiar van parked up on the side of the street and put the pieces together.

Guiltily, I approached the van and sucked up a deep breath before knocking on the side. It didn't take long for the door to slide open and reveal Skye herself.

"Hey," I said quietly, noticing her surprised expression. "Can we talk?"

She licked her lips nervously and nodded, before moving to the side to let me in. I climbed inside and watched as she shut the door before settling on the seat in front of me. I looked around and realised the little details I hadn't noticed yesterday. The little things that made this place Skye's and nobody else's.

"I'd offer you a drink, but I don't have any," she joked to lighten the mood, and I couldn't help but crack a small smile.

I breathed out before meeting her eyes. "Skye, I'm really sorry about yesterday. I shouldn't have reacted like that. If I had known that this was your home, I–"

"You didn't know," she said, shaking her head with embarrassment. "I didn't want you to know. It's my fault."

I pursed my lips, watching as she looked away with pink cheeks. It hurt me to know that she was embarrassed when I didn't care about any of this, I just cared about her.

"I want you to know that I respect your decision to join the Rising Tide," I said gently, making her look up. "If it's what you want, you should go for it."

"It is," she said with certainty.

I chewed on the inside of my mouth before asking, "Is there no way you can finish high school though? Graduate with me?"

She shook her head. "I don't want to, Y/N."

"But that's the bare minimum," I pleaded. "Hacking isn't a lifestyle. You need to work, too, and I can promise you that most places won't look to hire a high school dropout."

She leaned back in her seat and shrugged nervously. "Miles isn't graduating either. And he's got some friends who haven't graduated. They're all doing fine."

I looked down and pinched the bridge of my nose to contain my frustration. I promised myself I wouldn't argue with her, but the mention of her other friends was like a trigger.

"What now?" she asked with annoyance, realising I was annoyed. "You clearly have something to say about them."

"It doesn't matter," I said, biting my tongue.

"Sure it doesn't," she played along.

"It doesn't," I agreed.

"Yeah, and the Hulk isn't bright green," she said sarcastically.

I looked up and glared at her. She stared back challengingly, practically daring me to speak. So, I did.

"Your new hacker friends are the reason you're making these choices," I told her straight. "They're the reason you're making a huge mistake. The reason you're dropping out. And for what? So you can hack like them?"

She rolled her eyes. "I know you look down on us, but we're more than that."

"Skye, I don't give a shit about them!" I shouted without meaning to. "I only care about you!"

"Then stop talking crap about my friends!" she returned angrily.

"Why do you care about them so much?!"

"They gave me a place to stay when I had nowhere! They made me feel like I belonged!"

I frowned, anger replacing with hurt. "I always offered you a place to stay. I only ever wanted you to be safe. You never needed to be different with me. You belonged. Always."

She swallowed hard and looked away from me ashamedly. "Well it doesn't matter anymore. I'm leaving."

I breathed out deeply. "School? Our town? Leaving what?"

"All of it," she said quietly. "I don't expect you to understand."

I looked down to my fumbling hands, a tear slipping from my eye. I had never felt so angry at someone before in my life. She was treating me like I was a stranger, as if I wasn't somebody who knew her inside out. She was treating me like she treated everyone else except her new friends. And I couldn't deal with it anymore.

"Fine," I said, before moving to open the door. I jumped out her van and didn't spare her a glance as I said, "Have fun with the rest of your life. Sorry I didn't care enough."

She didn't say anything and I didn't expect her to. With a broken heart and headache, I left and didn't bother turning back.

—

"What do you mean she's run away?"

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Mr Lock said apologetically. "Her foster family got the note this morning. They're doing what they can to find her. She always turns up, you know that."

I knew her family didn't care if she was gone or not, so I knew Skye definitely wouldn't be found. Unlike usual, Skye hadn't contacted me before leaving, so something told me she wouldn't be turning up.

Our argument was over a week ago and I hadn't seen her since. It had been eating away at me the way we'd left things, but I couldn't find it in myself to face her. I had no idea what to say anyway. And I wasn't sure when she was planning on leaving, so I didn't think it was important right now. Clearly, I was wrong.

"I just thought you should know," Mr Lock said with a nod. "The police will come by soon to get a statement from you."

As usual. Except this time, I actually had no idea where she was.

I nodded, my mouth going dry. "Thank you... can I go now?"

He nodded hesitantly. "Of course."

I left his office and headed straight outside behind the bleachers where nobody could hear or see me. The first thing I did was try to ring Skye, but there was no answer and no way to leave a voicemail. I tried several times, hoping she'd pick up, but she didn't. And that's when I remembered the burner phone.

Immediately pulling it out, I turned it on and saw the message from her appear on my screen. I was quick to open it, my heart racing like it did every time she ran away. I knew she wasn't coming back this time though.

Hey, Y/N. I know you probably hate me, but I felt like I owed you this. I said I was leaving and I have. I can't tell you where. And I'm not good at goodbyes. I've had too many of them and I couldn't bring myself to say it to you. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I never wanted to, but I guess some things are inevitable, huh? I've managed to do it all my life, this isn't any different. I'm just sorry if I hurt you in the process. Anyway, this is pretty long and I don't even know if you read it, but yeah. I'm sorry. I wish things could have been different.

The text ended there and I found myself rereading it to myself over and over, her words imprinted in my mind. I knew we'd argued and exchanged hurtful words, but I never in a million years thought she'd leave without saying goodbye. I thought I meant more to her than this. But no. I was just another foster family she ran away from. And I wasn't so sure I'd see her again.

[perfectpaperbluebirds]

@sicktember #1

Prompt # 1: Fever

Title: Damn Nick Fury

Fandom: Avengers/MCU

To kick Sicktember off, I'm starting with some classic Avengers sickfic. This is actually part of a longer work that I posted many moons ago on AO3. Still one of my favorite whump fics that I've written.

Clint Barton breathed slowly and deeply as he drew back his bow, sighting in his next target. He was so far unnoticed by the cultists they were fighting, perched high in a tree as he was. Below, Natasha was baiting and dodging them with ease, dispatching one every now and then to keep them occupied. Clint's task was to pick them off as she did so.

Another arrow met its mark.The archer sniffled wetly as he reloaded while cold water continued to trickle down the back of his collar. He had made Fury aware a day or so ago that he had a mild cold, as was his duty as an assassin. If he wasn’t at one hundred percent, his commander needed to know. However, Fury had insisted he and Nat take this mission, since no one else was available. The soaking rain they encountered when they arrived was unexpected. However, it turned out the rain had actually made it easier to obtain the objective of this particular mission. Meanwhile though, it was making Clint thoroughly miserable. Compared to other missions it was going quickly, but the five hour stakeout leading up to the current fight had not been pleasant in the continuous downpour, even up in a tree.

Wiping his nose on his shoulder, Cint again loosed an arrow. Only five more cultists to go. Then they could loot the bunker, get the map they needed, and go home. A drip of water hit him right in the eye, and he growled to himself, inwardly cursing Fury. He had started to shiver an hour ago, though he made sure his hands were steady as ever. He couldn’t wait to take a long, hot shower and sleep for at least twelve hours. He only needed to hold out a little longer.

The tickle in his throat had gradually become a low, irritating ache. He coughed softly. The sound did little to make his throat feel better, but it did make the nearest cultist look up at him. Before the man could do anything other than widen his eyes, Clint’s arrow ended him expertly.

Hawkeye sighed wearily. Four more to go.

~~~~~~~~~~

Thirty-six hours later, Clint and Natasha were relaxing on the couch in Avengers Tower. Natasha had her legs tucked up under her and was reading a book while Clint had his head pillowed in her lap with his arm flung over his eyes. Suddenly, his breath hitched warningly. Natasha lifted her arm in a practiced way to give him room to turn and bury his face into a tissue:

"HehyYIIZSHHhoo! hihtESHHHiew!"

She looked down at him with an irritated sound. "That is the third time you've sneezed in as many minutes. I'm making zero progress in this book. You're going to be finding yourself a new pillow in a minute here. Plus I'll kill you if you get me sick."

He sniffled wetly and blew his nose before replacing his head in her lap with a weak cough. "Aww, you would ndever kill mbe, 'Tash. I'mb the only one who puts up with your crap. But I'mb sorry. I can'dt help the sneezing. It's mbaking mbe mbiserable too if that helps."

She sighed in an annoyed way, but couldn't help looking down at him fondly. "You're lucky I know you well enough to understand what you're saying. And you're also lucky that it just so happens to be true that we tolerate each other better than most, so you're safe from assassination for now."

"Blame Fury. This cold wasn't so bad until I had to sid oud id the rain for hours." He sniffled thickly again, barely turning his head away as he followed it up with a cough.

Natasha made a face, swatting his shoulder lightly. "You're gross. Cover your mouth when you cough. And I don't *have* you let you lay here, you know. You have a perfectly comfortable bed only a short elevator ride away."

" 'm cold though. And if I go ubstairs there's ndo one to mbake mbe tea." He swiped at his reddened nose with the tissue, trying to look extra pitiful.

"You're extra whiny when you're sick. Not a good look on you, Hawk." She carded her fingers once through his hair. "And you're just cold because you're a little feverish."

Instead of replying, Clint halfway sat up again and brought a tissue to his nose, breath scissoring and nostrils flaring.

Natasha groaned as Clint once more exploded into a sneezing fit:

"Gihh-ESSHHshuuu! hehKSHHHshuu!" He coughed, then sneezed again: "ERRSHHhuh! Hih'EZSHHyue! --guhhh." Clint miserably rubbed the space between his eyebrows, slowly lowering himself once again to Natasha's lap.

"Apparently my partner has managed to catch the world's sneeziest cold. How did I get so lucky?"

Once again Clint was kept from replying as Natasha's communicator began to ring. She glanced at the screen, then at Clint.

"It's Fury," she warned.

Clint quickly sat up. She answered the device, turning it so they could both see. Fury's single eye met theirs, looking as serious and commanding as ever.

"Good, you're both here. Barton… your nose looks red. How are you feeling?"

"Aboud the sabe I guess. Sneezy."

"And feverish," Natasha said with a warning look at her partner.

"How feverish?"

"Ndot very. One hundred or so," Clint mumbled.

"That's… not ideal. But I don't have any other option… if at all possible, we need you both out in the field again ASAP. We've discovered a small Hydra base, but it's a crucial one. Some of their brainiest goons are posted there, working on something big. From some communication we intercepted, it sounds like their project is almost finished. I need eyes out there immediately. Recon only for now. Think you can handle that?"

The assassins glanced at each other. "We're good to go," said Clint firmly, though the sore-sounding rasp in his voice betrayed him slightly.

"I hope so. Don't disappoint me. I expect you in the air in an hour or less." With that their director ended the call.

Barton and Romanov glanced at each other once more, this time with a weary sigh from Clint before they stood and went to get ready.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Barton! What's your situation?"Natasha's voice crackled over the com.

"Being... chased by three. Heading... to the roof… of the base," Clint gasped around labored breathing.The metal steps made a sharp clanking noise as the archer sprinted up them, nocking an arrow as he went.

"Can you handle them on your own?"

"We'll… see...," he panted, sweat rolling into his eyes. "Backup… would be nice...."

"I'll be there as soon as I can. I've got 4 of my own. Hang in there, Hawk!" The line went dead for the time being.

"I'm gonna … kill Fury…," he mumbled breathlessly as he reached the roof. He darted to the far side of the area and spun around, taking a knee and aiming his bow at the stairway he had just vacated. The sounds of the three Hydra agents sprinting up behind him were unmistakable, but he was as ready as he was going to be.

"This was supposed to be... an easy recon mission, but noooooo…. It's another... full-on assault," he continued to mumble, trying to catch his breath as the shouting on the stairs got louder.

As an extra stroke of bad luck, it was pouring rain here too. Clint flipped the water out of his eyes with a toss of his head, his hair and clothes hanging on him limply. He hadn't stopped shivering since they'd gotten off the jet. His teeth were now chattering and his fingers were blue with cold. His throat was absolutely burning now, raw and inflamed, the pain exacerbated from running. He couldn't suppress a hoarse barking cough just as the first baddie poked his head through the opening. Clint dispatched him immediately, but the two still coming up were not dissuaded.

The second goon got lucky. Clint's hand slipped on the bow a fraction, and the Hydra agent got hit in the shoulder instead of the heart. The archer knew he was in trouble now. With trembling hands, he managed to kill number three with a final arrow, but the one he had wounded, by far the biggest of them all, continued to advance menacingly.

Hand-to-hand combat was evidently imminent. On any other day Clint could have made short work of this, but this miserable, feverish cold had him operating at around fifty percent capacity and falling. Clint pulled out his knives with shaky hands and another rasping cough. When his opponent was a foot away, Clint tried to leap up to get in the first hit. Instead he slipped and staggered, and the Hydra agent's fist, with all of his weight behind it, caught him in the ribs. Clint heard a dull cracking sound as he was flooded with pain, but he couldn't pause. He spun and ducked, trying to avoid the worst of the blows while trying to get in some of his own. At least ⅓ of his opponent's swings met their target though, and in minutes Clint was battered and bruised, barely clinging to consciousness.

He knew he only had enough stamina for one more try. In a split second, while the Hydra agent was off-balance winding up for another swing, Clint leapt once more, and at last his knife met its mark.

As the baddie crumpled to the ground, so did Hawkeye, wheezing weakly, every breath agonizing. He activated his com as his vision threatened to gray out:

"Roof... clear. Good...Nat?"

"All clear down here too. Mission complete. Nice job, Hawk. Let's turn this bunker inside out and go home."

"Mmph."

"You good, Barton?" she asked, concern suddenly in her voice.

"Gonna need... medevac… Won't… make it down… stairs…."

If Natasha replied, he did not hear her. He let his head fall against the cool, wet metal and let the grayness overtake his vision.

~~~~~~~~~~

48 hours later found Clint lying on a bed in S.H.E.I.L.D. medical with broken ribs and and a confirmed case of pneumonia. He was drifting in and out of consciousness from the drugs they were giving him, but his ears perked up when he heard Natasha arguing with someone nearby.

"He's stable. Not on oxygen. Fever is controlled. He can tolerate oral meds. There's no reason he needs to stay. I promise you, he won't recover while he's here. You need to discharge him home."

The haughty-looking orderly she was speaking with huffed angrily, muttering about shortness of breath and heart rate and changing oxygen requirements.

Clint let himself drift off again to the sound of their voices, trusting his partner to deal with the situation. A cool hand on his cheek awakened him a little while later. He blearily opened his eyes to meet Natasha's, for of course it was she that had roused him.

"We're busting you out of here," she whispered with a little smile. "They're bringing a wheelchair now."

"Thangk god," Clint groaned. "And thangk *you*, 'Tash. You're a lifesaver."

"Eh, you've saved my life plenty of times too. I think we're pretty even."

It took some maneuvering to get a very breathless, battered, and achy Clint out of the bed and into the wheelchair, but they managed it with minimal damage. Once he was settled in the chair, Natasha wheeled him away to their rooms.

Inside Clint's suite, they again had to coordinate getting him from the chair to his bed. Natasha was grateful Clint's pain tolerance was high, because she knew the transfer was far rougher without the assistance of the medical staff. He didn't make a sound throughout the process however, though his face was drawn in pain. As soon as he was settled though, he let out the breath he'd been holding in a rush, which quickly became a nasty coughing fit. He had trouble catching his breath for several moments even after the fit ended. He gasped and wheezed and clutched his ribs, sweaty and reddened and miserable. Natasha could only watch helplessly, stroking his hair to try to help him relax.

"Damn Fury," he croaked weakly when he could finally speak. "This fugcking sucks. "

"Language, please. But I can't argue with you there."

"I'mb gonna kill himb for sending me od thad mission."

"I think he got his just desserts since now his best archer is out of commission for a few months. But at least it seems like the sneezy part of your cold is better."

"You h- had to s- hih- say sumbthing, dih- dn't you?" Clint croaked, gingerly bracing his ribs as his breath scissored and his red nose twitched:

"Gih'tsschh! Ghhnxt'chf! Oh Fugck. Ow! Ow ow ow...." Clint groaned, gritting his teeth, eyes squeezed shut in pain. "Not doing that again."

"Yeah, stifling is probably not wise. Poor sick guy," Natasha murmured, carding his hair with her fingers as they waited for Clint's pain to subside.

After a moment, Clint opened one eye, looking suspicious. " 'Poor sigck guy?' Who are you and what have you done with mby partner?"

Natasha smirked as she sat on the edge of his bed. "Would you prefer I call you a whiny asshole?"

"Yes. Maybe. I dunno," Clint mumbled with a weary sigh and a grimace of pain as he exhaled.

"Well too bad for you, because right now *my* partner is sick and miserable and I plan to baby him at least a little until he's feeling better."

"Guess I'mb nodt complainig," Clint mumbled, stifling a cough, which only made him clutch his ribs in pain. "Hurts whed I cough. Hurts whed I try not to cough. Fugck me."

"Language, seriously. But what can I do to help? You need water, food, drugs, anything?"

"Nodt hungry or thirsty. Too sood for drugs. I just want to sleeb, 'Tash."

"That sounds like a good plan. I'll leave you be then. But I'll be back to check on you soon." She stood up right away, fussing around and tidying up his nightstand area before moving toward the door.

" 'Tash?"

She turned expectantly.

" 'm still cold," he mumbled thickly, looking pale and weary now.

Her face softened affectionately. "Well you're still running a fever, hotshot. You're gonna feel cold."

He groaned pathetically. She moved to his side once more.

"Aww, you're shivering," she murmured, stroking his cheek.

"Told you, I'mb freezing…."

She sighed, looking at him fondly. "Is this you trying to say that you need some extra body heat in bed with you for a while?"

He looked at her pleadingly.

"Okay, okay, no more puppy eyes. I'm coming. But if you get me sick--"

"I know, I know, you'll kill mbe. I'll try ndot to share."

"That's all I ask." She kicked off her shoes and slid into bed beside him, doing her best to jostle around as little as possible. They carefully arranged themselves so that Clint was tucked against Natasha, most of his weight resting against her, while her weight was against the stack of pillows behind them. This position seemed to cause the archer the least pain, and in fact he relaxed against her right away, his breathing deepening.

" I'mb sorry I'mb so warmb. You'll probably swelter," mumbled Clint sleepily.

"It's not the first time I've slept with you when you're running a fever, and I'm sure it won't be the last. As long as you're warm enough."

"Am now," he breathed, nearly asleep.

"Then that's all that matters to me."

[aelin-queen-of-terrasen]

Hi! I feel like we were robbed of a reunion between Aelin and Nox in KoA so could you write it, please?

Sorry for the delay, nonnie! Hope you'll like this! 💖

cinders : chapter one

post-koa rowaelin fanfic • fic masterlist • full masterlist

══════════════════

Honor among thieves, Aelin remembered the phrase with wry amusement as she was kicked out of her seventh tavern that night. Thief or not, she had no qualms about her honor or the lack thereof, not when she was drunk out of her mind with not a copper in her pocket to spend.

All night, she'd cheated at cards, started four brawls and failed to pay for the ale she consumed at most establishments she'd graced with her presence. Come dawn, there would be no tavern left that she hadn't been banned from. Idly, she wondered what would happen if the barkeep found out he was kicking out adarlan's assassin—or the queen of terrasen, for that matter. He probably won't believe her, considering she looked worse than an average drunkard roaming the streets of orynth in middle of the night with a swollen eye and a busted lip. Her wrist hurt from where she'd fallen down and landed on it during one of the aforementioned brawls but she paid it no heed, already looking for another place she could waste her night away in.

Aelin steadied herself with the support of a nearby wall, head spinning and her knees buckled.

She pressed her cheek against the cool surface of the cemented wall, wondering how long she had before someone in her court would notice her absence and drag her back to the palace like she was an invalid in need of protection instead of mala's heir and the queen of one of the most prosperous kingdoms since the rebuilding finished months ago.

The scrape of boots behind her made her turn, hands already positioned in easy reach of the daggers hidden beneath her cloak.

"So this is how our queen passes her time now?" a familiar voice drawled out behind her, amusement in his tone.

That voice—her head spun as she tried to place it. Aelin turned towards him, the movement too fast for her inebriated state and nausea rose in her stomach. She squinted her eyes at the figure standing a few steps away, his own hood covering a better part of his face. The figure looked tall and lean, dressed like one of the common folk. Maybe she could outmaneuver him—

He threw his hood back and her heart stumbled. "Nox?" her voice was slurred, wonder and disbelief warring within her.

"You caught me," he said, voice filled with amusement. "When I imagined us meeting again, this is not what I had in mind."

Her eyebrows rose to her hairline. "You say that as if it was a sure thing we'd meet again."

"I had to. Do you know how awful it is to claim friendship with the saviour of Erilea and have them dismiss your words as a lie?" Nox said, sketching a mocking bow.

He pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. Her lips twitched up in amusement as she said, "I apologise for the inconvenience my popularity may have caused you."

Her head still spun, and she cautiously took a step forward, the moonlight illuminating her old friend's face completely. He looked just like she remembered, moderately handsome with those dark hair framing his face and a lean figure. He grinned, though there was something subdued about it now—some weight that hadn't been there before, no doubt a product of the war they'd all been a part of. When he said nothing, she added: "Lysandra told me she met you," Aelin said. "I tried to find you, after the war—but you'd vanished."

His grin widened into a wolfish one—too reminiscent of her beloved cousin's, "I helped drug the lords of terrasen—Lord Darrow would've sent me to the gallows." He stepped forward to provide support when she almost tripped over her own two feet.

Aelin let him wrap his arms around her, leaning into him. God, she'd missed the former thief and his troublesome grin, the friendship he'd offered her in a competition filled with enemies and a palace teeming with insincere people, the lighthearted air he carried with him.

"Lord Darrow needs to remove that stick shoved far up his ass," she said when she'd steadied herself again somewhat. "I tried to find you."

"I know. Thank you—for saving my life." Nox squeezed her shoulder gratefully. "You didn't have to warn me, you could've just let me stay but you didn't."

He pulled away when he smelled the ale on her breath and frowned. "You shouldn't be out here alone. I think we should take you home." Her stomach sank at the thought of the towering palace, images flashing inside her head one after another—a kitchen, low voices, blood on the bed, the healer's face, a figure clutching her abdomen in pain. Home. Home shouldn't be a place she'd be afraid of.

Her stomach churned at the thought of having to return. Aelin frowned. "I don't want to go back."

"I think you should," he said. "I saw two search parties roaming tonight."

She didn't dare look at his face, lest she might snap at him. He was yet another person who was so interested in telling her how to act. She wasn't an immature who needed instructions from others. "Fine, I should go," she conceded. "You could come with me, you know—there are a lot of open jobs around the palace—"

"I think I will," he nodded. "I don't think you should be out here alone, whatever prompted you to come here."

He looked at her expectantly, waiting for an answer. When none came, he shrugged but the offer hung in the silence between them until she answered, "It's not so simple." Then needing to change the topic of the conversation, asked, "Where have you been—back to the same former profession?" The world spun a little, and her vision grew blurrier. Her voice sounded like a garbled mess, even to her own ears. It was a wonder Nox could make sense of her words.

"And if I did? Not all of us are secret heirs to enslaved kingdoms with kick-ass powers," he grinned.

Aelin tried to answer him but her mouth wouldn't open, her eyelids felt so heavy, half drooped and her legs gave out beneath her. Nox, as if he hadn't noticed the real extent of her inebriated state before, shifted her so she was leaning on him for support but it was a struggle to keep her upright. The palace of Orynth was only streets away now when someone—one of the guards, perhaps?—shouted something, though she couldn't make out the words.

She looked up from her half-asleep state minutes later to the sound of a familar pattern of footsteps.

Nox stiffened, two daggers identical to the ones they'd practiced with in Rifthold sometimes in his hands.

"Relax," she told him, though the words were so slurred, she couldn't be sure he understood. "Lorcan is one of the bloodsworn of my court."

Said bloodsword had his own sword out, looking furious, if not somewhat tired, though the determination shone on his face—he looked like a man on a mission. He walked towards them, movements rigid as ever, every muscle in his body tensed. Nox sheathed his daggers, though he positioned himself in front of her. Aelin rolled her eyes, wondering why everyone she befriended acted had to be a protective bastard?

"Step away from her," said Lorcan through gritted teeth.

The thief of Perranth did no such thing and she barely refrained from another eye roll. Stubborn, overprotective mother hens. "Really, Lorcan, this is one of my friends. You can put your sword away; no one is about to murder me here, I think." Her bloodsworn didn't look so amused at her attempt at humor and this time, she didn't supress her eyeroll.

If Fenrys were here, he'd have teased Lorcan for being the overbearing mother hen Elide claimed he was. Lord Lorcan Lochan—the name was a constant source of amusement for her—may not like her, but he was loyal to his queen and diligent in his duties.

And Fenrys wasn't here—seperated from her for the first time since the two of them had escaped Doranelle months ago—he was looking over the preparation of the last few details of the peace treaties in Rifthold and helping Dorian settle into his position, assisting in the rebuilding efforts there. Elide and Lysandra were at their own estates, looking over their own territories. Her cousin had accompanied Lysandra to Carraverre with a promise to return as soon as she had a routine in place. And Rowan was the farthest—in a different continent, in the city which had caused her so much pain and suffering, Aelin was still haunted by it's memories.

So it was that Aelin was left to spend time with the least favourite member of her court—Lorcan.

She wondered when her mate would be back, wondered what he'd say if he'd found her here tonight instead, wondered if she could hide what she'd heard from him—how he'd react if he found out. He won't leave her, not him. He'd tell her servants' gossip was nothing to be worried about, he'd comfort her the best he could. But over the years, he'd realise how right they were and he wouldn't say a word of his disappointment—no, he loved her too much to hurt her like that. He'd come to resent her for it though, and then immortality won't seem like the blessing it does now.

Aelin's thoughts were steered away from the dark direction by Lorcan's words. "Been dallying with the commonfolk, have you?"

"Don't be an ass," she snapped at the implication. "He's a friend from Rifthold. I won't hurt my mate like that."

Lorcan had the good sense to look apologetic as he rubbed at his face. "I know you won't—I didn't mean to say it." It was as good an apology as she'd ever receive from him.

Poor Nox had turned pale at the sight of a tall, brooding fae but he said with all the nonchalance he could muster, he said, "I saw her outside one of the taverns I frequented and I recognized her. I offered to escort her back."

Lorcan extended his hand, and the scowl on his face made her decide she'd be better off not pissing him off more. He scanned her head to toe, jaw clenching at the sight of the bruises on her face. "You're hurt," he didn't wait for a confirmation. His fists clenched and unclenched repeatedly, "Right now, you'll come with me to the palace, you'll go to your room and you will sleep, like you should've been doing. Tomorrow, we'll talk about this."

His features were schooled into a cool mask of indifference. She almost snapped at being ordered to bed like a child but the concern in his voice made her reconsider her words. Still, she couldn't help it when the words escaped. "I'm not some petulant child," she said in quiet voice.

"You're certainly acting like one now," then his features softened a little. "Let's go home."

Neither said a word until Lorcan had escorted her into her chambers. At her behest, Nox was given a guest room to stay in (much to Lorcan's displeasure) while one of the healers from the royal wing tended to her. She wondered if it was this woman she'd heard talking with the cook, or if she'd even heard anyone at all. Maybe it was all some horrible nightmare she'd dreamed up? She wished it had been some nightmare—or if not, then at least that she hadn't heard the words at all and lived in blissful ignorance for however long she could.

He turned to leave and Aelin started, "I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have—"

He snapped. "Tomorrow. We'll talk about this tomorrow. This—" he pointed towards the bruises—"is nothing to what could've happened if someone had recognised you. You have no idea what you risked!"

"I know what I risked and what could've happened," she bit back. "This isn't the first time I've wasted my night away in tavern after tavern." Her head hammered with pain at the volume of their words but she paid it no heed in her fury. He had no right to call her out; she didn't need his permission or someone else's. What did he care if come dawn, she was found dead in a ditch somewhere? He would be able to live with Elide and still be free of the blood oath. It could be no loss to him. "I'm under no obligation to answer to you," she said.

"I'm a part of your court. If you put yourself in danger, you will answer me," he said.

"I was in danger long before I took the throne. I can handle myself."

Lorcan had either noticed how drained she felt and decided to postpone the conversation or he saw no benefit in arguing with an unreasonable drunkard further because he nodded with a terse nod and an omnious: "We're not done here," and left her room, closing the door behind him softly. She wished he'd slammed the door shut instead, yelled at her or left her on the steps of the palace to the care of some maid—almost wished he'd drawn out his sword on her instead of leaving her alone to the silence of her chambers.

Involuntarily, she recalled the sudden, sharp pains in her abdomen last week. Her cycles had been a little irregular since the war but she hadn't given it much thought until she'd stumbled upon the two gossiping servants—those cursed words she wished she'd never heard. She had come back and tried to sleep, tried to discredit the rumours as speculation but those words had haunted her until she'd escaped her room for fresh air and found herself in a cheap tavern. Those horrible visions had flashed in front of her eyes until she was too intoxicated to remember her own name. Sleep offered no solace at all, and everytime she shut her eyes, she saw a stillborn child, a bed covered in blood, an empty cradle and she'd woken up covered in sweat and her breathing harsh, heart beating wildly against her ribcage.

The bruises on her face turned darker by the morning, but the salve she applied brought her some relief from the pain. Aelin left her chambers only when necessity called for it, the bruises cleverly hidden under her golden curls arranged tactically. The third meeting with the lords of all great houses was dreadfully boring. Lorcan's piercing gaze and Darrow's inquisitive look when she didn't greet them with her usual aplomb did nothing to ease her anticipation for her confrontation. He made no allusion to it as she attended to her duties, though she wasn't naive enough to hope he'd forget. Thus, it was with no surprise that she welcomed him into the sitting room of her private chambers that afternoon when she retreated for a small break. Indeed, he looked comically out of place in the ornate, colourful chamber with his black tunic he wore.

Lorcan's dark eyes upbraided her bruises, then satisfied with the healing progress, sat down and fell into silence. She didn't dare break it—he wanted to have this conversation. She was determined not to give up.

"We need to talk," he said when he realised she won't initiate the conversation.

"We do," she agreed to his surprise, until she added: "How is Nox?"

"Nox? Made drinking buddies with the thief, did you?" he asked. His lips curled in disdain—at her actions or her choice in friends, she couldn't tell.

"Dark hair, pretty face, smiles too much?" she asked. "I'd like you to find him a job 'round here. He has skills we could use, and I'd like to have more friendly companions here."

He looked tempted to retort, but stopped in time to recognise her attempt at distracting him. "I'll see to it. Now, will you tell me why you thought sneaking out of the palace, disappearing for hours and then showing up drunk and half passed-out, with a known local thief, bruised and battered was a good idea?" It didn't sound like a good idea when he said it like that, but she hadn't planned most of it, had she? Finding Nox had been a coincidence, and she hadn't foreseen running out of coins, getting kicked out of taverns or starting those brawls.

"I survived for years in much unsavory conditions than this," said she. "I don't need you to be an overprotective mother hen to me."

He arched an eyebrow. "So you want to be difficult about this?" he leaned back in his seat and relaxed his muscles, "I know you didn't just leave because you wanted to get drunk. Something happened, and you can choose to tell me now, or we can wait here until you confess. I have infinite patience and nothing better to do." She was tempted to walk away from this conversation, little good though it would do her. He pressed, "I'll wait for your answer right here, Aelin. If you want to—that is, if you think it'll help, I'll listen." And he looked so awkward, so uncomfortable, had Aelin looked up at him then, she would have been amused to see one of the most powerful fae warriors squirm in his seat, looking alarmed at whatever it was he saw in her face.

"I'm sorry! I told you I am," she asserted. "I wish you'd leave me alone."

Lorcan didn't think she was apologising for sneaking out without telling him—hell, it seemed like she wasn't apologising to him at all. He didn't know what she meant. Maybe she didn't know either.

He awkwardly patted her arm in an effort to comfort her, though he failed miserably. He hadn't seen that haunted look in her eyes since that first month after she'd escaped that iron coffin. It had taken months of careful manuevering from Rowan to coax that light back into her eyes. He wondered what haunted her now, what bothered her so. How long would it take for her to recover should she break again—this woman who had accomplished the very impossible, turned the tide in many a war, who had defeated armies through sheer will alone? How many times could she break before it would be impossible to put her back together? He wished Rowan were here to console her—or even Fenrys or Aedion. They won't do such a lousy job at it and she certainly won't confide in him. He shouldn't have thought otherwise—

"Pardon me for the interruption, Your Majesty, Your Lordship," the maid said, "but you have visitors."

Lorcan was disinclined to allow Aelin to present herself to company now when she looked one word away from shattering but he knew better than to try to stop her. The wilful woman hardly ever listened to him though, and she was walking out of her chambers before he'd even risen from his seat. He grumbled under his breath, following after her until a sharp squeal erupted from her mouth.

Lorcan was running towards the throne room, already drawing out his sword. It was pure relief that greeted him when his eyes fell on the grinning visitor, his sharp canines gleaming under the sunlight filtering inside through the windows. He nodded in acknowledgement towards the fae warrior and he returned with a look of his own before a noisy storm of gold and green flew past him and slammed into the still awaiting arms of the warrior. A lesser male might have fallen from the force of the collision, but he wrapped his arms around her waist, as unwilling to leave her as she was.

"Welcome back, Your Majesty," Lorcan said wryly as the squeals of delight from his queen grew louder.

King-consort Rowan Whitethorn swept his mate into his arms. "Missed me so much, did you?" he chuckled.

"Understatement," she mumbled into his chest, pulling herself closer. "Tomorrow, I'll pass a decree that you're not allowed to leave me behind ever again."

Rowan mumbled promises to not go anywhere without her anytime soon. Without a care for everyone else in the room, his lips pressed hers with an incessant need, though he drew back when she winced. It was with no small amount of horror that Rowan looked at her, reallylooked at her, memorising every line on her face, the width of her grin and the delight suffused in her brilliant ashryver eyes and stopped short at the busted lip and the bruise around her eye, brushing it with a featherlight touch of his fingers.

Aelin stiffened, and he saw in her expression that she hadn't planned to inform about this misadventure of hers, whatever it was.

He shut his eyes, attempting to regain some measure of composure. "Explain," he demanded, a lethal calm seeping into his voice.

Rowan didn't miss the way his wife stiffened further at his voice, and he noticed her eyes. The emptiness in them was almost too much to bear, too painful a reminder of what she'd endured the previous year and he looked away, though his voice softened.

"Fireheart, what happened? Tell me," he urged in the softest tone he could manage, "Please?"

It was the last word he spoke—the one filled with so much concern, love and devotion that she failed to keep her tears at bay. It was a valiant attempt she made, to blink the traitorous evidence of her grief back into her eyes but then she looked at him again—her mate, her husband, her best friend.

She let Rowan pull her into another embrace; and then, Aelin Ashryver Whitethorn Galathynius came undone in his arms.

══════════════════

soooo new fic. hope y'all liked it!

tags: @little-crow-corvere @abookishfreak @louisleblancdiggory @courtofjurdan @queenofgreenbriar @clockworkgraystairs @julemmaes @mymultiversee @queen-of-glass @strangely-constructed-soul @mijaldraws @http-itsrebecca @aesthetics-11 @lord-douglas-the-third @flowersinvegas @aelinchocolatelover @faerie-queen-fireheart @sad-book-whore @hizqueen4life @the-gods-killer @booknerdproblems @annejulianneh111 @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @b00kworm @mysweetvillain @curlyredqueen06 @moondancer-204 @thesurielships @witchling-leonor @ladywitchling @amren-courtofdreams @ifinallygavein @jlinez @faequeenaelin @df3ndyr @in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @superspiritfestival @xx-fiona-xx @stardelia @maastrash @miihlovesnoone @sanakapoor @maddymelv @rattlethestarsdarling @ireallyshouldsleeprn @morganofthewildfire

let me know if you'd like to be tagged.