#i need this out there. i need the words to exist. i'll die if they don't
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i don't think people were meant to understand their childhoods and see their parents as people. i don't. i don't think people are meant to see them as anything but infallible, perfectly just, correct gods, who were right, who were right, who were always right
they were meant to be five years old and confused and sad because why is mommy hurting me but okay with it, okay with it, strangely, painfully, because they are five years old and this is what they know and they don't have to know anything else.
they weren't meant to know mommy has ptsd (she tells you about her childhood and you think that sounds so sad but you don't understand ptsd and trauma and the pain she is in, okay?). they weren't meant to think mommies are supposed to be nicer than this. they weren't meant to say i am choosing to forgive my mom because i love her and want her in my life because of course they love their mommy. they're five years old. it was never in question.
they were meant to be five years old living the worst years of their lives over and over again not understanding that it can be different, never tasting anything other than pain, going to sleep until it was time to hurt again, dreaming pain and being pain, another wound inflicted but they were so used to it that it became okay because this is what living is. this is what living is.
they were meant to be five years old locked in a closet, a tiny closet, full of guts and blood and dog shit and the mangled remains of their own child body, an impossibly tall ceiling (they are five years old. when is the last time you've seen a five-year-old? they're so small. they're so small. they're so small.) they were meant to never leave, never open that door, never wake up at ten and twelve and and and and—
people weren't meant for this. it hurt, you know? i know you do. there are worse things than pain.
i think the absence is killing me.
#i need this out there. i need the words to exist. i'll die if they don't#dissociative identity disorder#did system#actually cptsd#cptsd vent#ventposting#parental abuse cw#by valentine
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Honestly a lot of the time, it's not even about people having to agree with me, it's about needing to know that they actually heard and listened to what I had to say even if it didn't persuade them
Just... some basic indication that there's enough respect to give a shit about what I said, and also to make sure that they disagree because they actually disagree and not cause they just didn't bother listening
It's all I really ask
#I forgot what this was about part way through writing about it; but then I remembered it's about Ukraine#like I just need to know that you actually understand what's happening there and what people are going through#you want me to care about your thing? show me you have any any any grasp of what's going on in Ukraine#it's uh... it's too many friends where if I'm just honest... this is about them#people I adore but people where... I don't know if they ever even once listen to what I have to say#...though maybe it's better this way... at least if they just ignore me I can say they just don't understand what's going on#that they're just being fed lines by other people or don't care#...if... they... knew the shit Ukrainians go through and still didn't care... would be a lot harder to respect them#would take a certain level of callous to do that and... these are people I care about very much so#...but I don't know; eats at me... you know#...and even on less serious topics... boy I wish you'd ever listen to me#if it weren't for the fact you say you like me... I'd be pretty damn sure you can't fucking stand me and I do nothing but annoy you#...I don't know if you've... ever... listened to anything I've said on any subject#when you do; you usually correct me... even though; brilliant as you are... you're erm... not always right#I don't get it... I don't get you... every word I say seems to be wrong... I'm so stupid and you're so smart#and yet you get real upset when I want to die... so you must actually like me and our communication styles don't match up#thank god you never seem to read my tags... or... much of anything else I say#truthfully I'd follow you anywhere; and you can treat me any way you want#but man I don't think my thoughts or opinions matter to you even a little... I think I just exist to be your rubber duck#...that's how it feels anyway#but all that aside... just wish you'd listen to me on Ukraine cause it actually matters#this post started out about some other people too... and sure... I like them well enough; and they're maddeningly wrong#like sputnik levels or wrong#drives me nuts; like you're not stupid and you're not cruel so why do you act so stupid and cruel?... turn you brain on#but uh... I actually just don't care about them that much#where as you... I could put it into words... but I won't#it's just a shame... like forget any of the stuff about me; it's just you're so kind... wish you'd care about what's going on in Ukraine#...I gotta stop or I'll go on all night; and I'm already too tired#mm tag so i can find things later
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Cave boy Danny. What if he offhandedly mentions his parents being THERE (as in not dead) and being Doctors (not the same kind of doctors Bruce's parents are) and things like that and doesn't realize that the batfam starts thinking that this? This is what's different with this Bruce. He didn't lose his parents and thus does not grow up wanting vengeance, and his parents are similar in personalities but in a different field!
Now Danny is still as casual young Bruce as ever but the others are just freeking out around him.
Things are strange for a while. Danny knows that his actions have caused the Waynes to be....wary around him. Even Jason- who honestly threw a whole ass parade for Gotham in celebration of Joker's death- seemed to be tense around him.
Danny can't really say he blames them. He still doesn't know why Phantom reacted the way it did- a bit alarming. His ghost side marked Joker as a threat from the moment it laid eyes on him- a threat that could not and would not be reasoned with.
His ghost -half attacked, knowing that Joker's existence threatened his core. A core that was created from the desire to keep his friends safe at the moment of his death. (He had known he would die the moment the portal's electricity hit him- and Danny had not been mournful of his end but rather horrified that Tucker or Sam could have followed him to the afterlife. His last thought as a human was Please let me live long enough to keep them safe.)
Never has that happened before- not even when faced with Vlad or Dan. It was strange to watch Phantom attack and not be in equal amounts of control within his body.
Phantom has always felt a part of him but also not. Danny had once tried to explain it to Jaz, only to end up frustrated when she tried to paint Phantom as a different personality that shared the mind-space with Danny.
Danny knows Phantom isn't like that.
He's not another person- Phantom is Danny in the same sense that Danny is alive but dead. For the same reason, Danny is the flipped color scheme of Phantom. They are one, just viewed differently.
Or maybe they saw the world differently?
It's hard to say and even harder to put into words.
The closest Danny could come to explain was an example Tucker gave him. Someone is the same but acts ultimately differently online, even when they aren't trying to catfish someone.
It's the fact they are behind a screen that gives them just the extra amount of courage. Tuck had said.
Ancients, he misses Tuck. His ship is not ready to venture into his Ghost Zone- hell, if Danny is honest, it's barely able to move. He is trying his best to get it working, but it's slow going. Too slow, even with Wayne's generosity.
"Master Brucie," Alfred started, pausing just within the doorframe of Danny's room until invited in. He does that now, keeping to his manners as though Danny was a guest of the Waynes. Not someone who he can be so familiar with.
It stings to know his killing had lost him the right to be treated as a stranger when Alfred had always treated him as young Bruce Wayne the moment he was found.
"Yes?" He asks, trying to smile. It falls flat, but it's worth the effort.
Alfred's face stays impassive, and Danny tries to tell himself that he doesn't care. He's not a young Bruce Wayne. He wants nothing to do with the Wyanes'.
"There are more gifts for you." The bulter says. "Shall I bring them to your room?"
Danny has received a lot of fan mail since his actions were leaked to the public. Everyone knew that Joker was taken out by Danny Kane. And there wasn't a single person in Gotham who hadn't been hurt or known someone injured by the madman.
He is being praised as a hero.
For murder.
Danny can't find it in himself to feel guilty about it. Joker needed to die. He had too many chances to change, and too many people got hurt.
"That's okay. I'll go downstairs and look through them. I feel like watching a movie anyway." He shrugs his shoulders while strolling to the door in his lazy stride.
Alfred steps out of his way, bowing ever so slightly. "Very good sir."
Sir.
That stings.
Danny doesn't bring it up or mention that Alfred keeps a safe space between them. Not enough that it would be rude, but definitely one of a servant following a master instead of a man who thought him the younger version of his son.
When they arrive at the room, he is surprised to find a white shipping cart filled to the brim with packages and letters waiting for him. Standing beside the cart, flipping through the envelopes, is Tim.
He has yet to see much of Tim. Not since Danny proved his doubts weren't as unfound as Danny actively tried to convince the other teen of.
No time like the present.
"Hey, Tim." He calls just to mentally get the other prepared for his approach. As expected, Tim whips around with a narrow eye-ed glare that does nothing to hide his distaste for Danny. Alfred follows them into the room but stays by the door at an appropriate distance. "Anything good?"
"Good, how?" Tim bites, and Danny fights to not roll his eyes.
"I don't know. Maybe a letter from my mom saying I'm a good boy or another football from dad-"
"I beg your pardon?" Alfred cuts him off- which, okay, that's never happened before. The butler has never overstepped his position- even when they thought him harmless little Brucie- to talk over him.
Danny turns to find the man pasty white, looking both cautiously overjoyed and wishful. "Did you make a joke about your parents, Master Brucie?"
"Ugh, Yeah? Why?"
"Young sir, are- are your parents alive?"
Danny is floored by the choked-up emotion in that one sentence that all he can do is nod. Tim drops the package he was checking over, his jaw slacked, and staring at Danny like having parents was the answer of the universe.
"Thomas and Martha Wayne are alive in your universe.." Tim all but breaths. "They are alive and have more than one kid."
"Why is that a big deal?" Danny asks, unable to himself. "What happened to Bruce's parents here?"
"Master Thomas was a doctor," Alfred says, ignoring Danny's question. But he now hears the answer in the past tense when referring to Bruce's parents. "Is he still in your world?"
"Yes, and so is my mom." PHD doctors, but they don't need to know that.
"That's why you like this." Tim slumps into the chair closest to him. Danny is mightily alarmed that he seems pale now. "That's why you don't know anything about Batman. He was never inspired. You....you really are a civilian."
Danny will deny that he fleed the room when Tim burst into tears till the day he died. He does not look back even when Alfred yells for his return. He has outstayed his welcome.
He slips into his room, grabs anything not nailed down with any form of technology, and then activates his intangibility. He sinks down down, and down, to the caves. He knows where the Bats work, knows where to go from his nights where he tried to work on ship.
He flies in that direction, knowing he will never see the Waynes again. Not after realizing how much pain his lies have unwillingly caused.
Master Post Link
#dcxdpdabbles#dc x dp crossover#cave boy#part 7#Tim is sad that Danny is what Bruce could have been#evil or good Bruce always lost his parents#Alfred was also shocked.#Danny is running
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I've come to temporarily break my hiatus to bring up something deeply important. Because after a recent event, if I have to go another day without talking about it, I don't know what I'll do.
Fandoms have an enormous issue when it comes to bigotry and people feeling comfortable enough to be openly bigoted.
And I want to make it clear: everyone is capable of it. In fact, most people do it more often than they don't. But because this strange myth has been built up that if you aren't "blatantly saying slurs" or "killing others" it can't possibly be bigotry, we have done nothing but become dangerous behind closed doors.
If your friend has odd beef with a person of color in the fandom and holds them to standards they don't hold their white friends to, that is bigotry. If your friend feels some sort of way about the trans person in your friend group and tries to come up with reasons for why they specifically can't stay, that is also bigotry. If your group insists that a person with a personality disorder is making it up just for attention and uses that as a reason for why they can't be around them, that is bigotry as well.
I've never been upfront about it because... why do I, as a human being, need to be upfront about my identity when people randomly decide what I am? But I am in fact a person of color who is queer and disabled. Whenever I join a fandom group that is mostly white people, I am liked until this is discovered. And then I watch as people get brutal about things I do or say. Things that they don't do to other people in the group, and I also watch as they take my words and either twist them for convenience or ruin my reputation for it.
As a marginalized person, both in fandom and out, you are held to a unique standard that does not apply to other human beings around you. It makes doing what you love very difficult, because unfortunately as a marginalized person, people will always subconsciously side with the person trying to oppress or attack you. This has happened to me my entire life, from school to work spaces to even internet spaces claiming to be safe places.
People will say that they care about you and like you and even form a friendly bond with you, but the moment a person of privilege decides they do not like you very much, they can and will side with the other person even without proof of their issues with you. It's exhausting and ruins lives in places that should be fun and safe.
I am on my umpteenth experience with this exact cycle and I would be lying if I said it didn't make me feel like I couldn't live or breath in places I should be allowed to be involved in. It's a very real problem that refuses to end because no one has the courage to challenge it. I am speaking not only on my own experiences, but for the many other people of color or queers or disabled people who simply cannot join these so called "safe spaces" because of our identities conflicting with people who have been taught that we are lesser and not worth love or care.
If this is a problem you face, please know that I see you and I love you. It's hard to keep surviving in a world that wants to hurt you and leaves you abandoned and alone. I want you to know that the world is scary, but we all exist. You should be allowed to experience joy and fun without feeling like you're being suffocated and wanting to die.
You matter. The people around you that make you feel like you don't are nothing by comparison. You matter and I truly hope that we'll one day find each other and become the safe space that we deserve.
The marginalized people in your fandom are more important than your fictional characters and plotlines that you put above us. We're here and we're not leaving. Learn to live with us and protect us.
If we're truly your friends, you would care when your privileged "friends" want to remove us.
Additionally, please do not take this rant and make it only about white people who are part of these marginalized categories. This is a post about EVERYONE. Including the people of color around you. Do not remove us from this conversation. Care about ALL OF US if you support this at all. Thank you.
#RK Chat#I wrote this with my hands shaking knowing that a lot of people will want me dead for this#I wrote this knowing that people will stop supporting me or my art of they knew I was POC#I can't keep pretending this is okay#As a person whos at the end of my rope both in my real life and my life online I cannot be silent anymore#But I refuse for this to possibly be my last year and not speak my mind on a situation that has been killing me for years#Care about the people outside of people like you. I'm BEGGING you.
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Have some art + fic rn cuz i had this idea plaguing me for a whlie in my first playthrough of the game and i needed to have it realized.
I don't want to edit my writing just yet so i'll do that later, but for now have some mentally unstable Siffrin 👍
I'll come up with a title ltr, prob when i edit this and post to ao3 (so if this gets reblogs just check out the og post for latest ver.)
For now the warnings you should know of are just character death, lots of Siff hating himself, and i think suicide ideation? I wrote this a few hours ago n still don't want to go back just yet but basically its nothing that doesn't already exist in the game
Fic starts under the cut! Roughly 2000 words
(edit: i forgor some colors don't exist/can't be seen 🤡, fixed now!)
Siffrin can’t seem to fall asleep at all anymore. The night right before the loops he can only pretend to get some rest before facing the king. He isn’t quite sure what the reason is. Being stuck in one place for too long? Useless? His urges to reach out for Isa’s touch that keep him awake at night, yearning for connection that is immediately are followed by disgust in himself? The pure exhaustion at the thought of repeating the next day again? None seem to be the answer. Maybe its a combination.
He only knows that he’s exhausted. Exhausted, yet unable to rest. Even if he were able, would he want to risk what ever dream or nightmare his head might concoct? A blend of memories and deaths to remind him that he can’t escape?
Not being able to sleep makes them worse at the loops too unfortunately. They got along fine for the first few loops after his first sleepless night, though the mistakes ramped up. They cursed their body, cursed themself for being so weak. Simple and stupid mistakes getting them killed via boulder when they forgot and slip of the hand resulting in the weakest of Sadnesses offing him.
Loop of course taunted about his failures, like they always do. He couldn’t fully blame them, knowing deep down he deserved it. There was a pull he sometimes had though, to rest with them, even for just a little bit. He’s hung out with them before, when it gets overwhelming, never for very long. Despite that, to actually sleep with them is a different story. Different vulnerability that, he wasn’t comfortable with. Too weak, he didn’t need another thing for Loop to tease him about. No matter how tempting it would be to sit in the tree and doze off. He wouldn’t doubt that, if he could rest at this point, he would doze off until the next loop.
He can’t have that. He can’t let his family die again.
The next loop began, the stage set, and Siff opened his eye, despite every ache in their body telling them not too. They can’t listen to their body right now though. They need to travel the entire house in the next few loops for anything he might have missed before. One more sweep.
He carries out his lines, plays the role he’s meant, rehearsing the other actor’s lines in his head before they speak up. Familiar steps, expressions, directions. When they get to Isabeau, they slip up again, Isa’s concern blooms. But they’ve seen this before. It’ll be fine. Their gut twists at forcing Isa to be concerned, but theres a warmth in it too. That Isa cares. Cares about them. It’s strange, when Odile gets close to the truth, stars when she FINDS OUT the truth, there isn’t any warmth. Just, fear. But knowing Isa won’t find out, just cares and makes them promise to talk about it at a time they know won’t come, it’s a guilty pleasure. At least, for now. Before it becomes meshed with all the other lines Siffrin has come to expect from The Fighter.
While navigation the House like normal, they slip up occasionally, interacting with objects that spark Odile’s concern. They don’t bother reversing the mistakes, he hasn’t slipped up that much. There’s no way she could know. Siff crumbled on the first floor at the counter they jabbed themself into again. Unable to see it and always stupidly forgetting to be cautious there. Stupid.
And they kept making mistakes. Their exhaustion pulling at their body, their nerves eating them alive. There’s no warmth with new lines of concern from their actors. Just spikes of panic followed by their attempts to reassure them. To continue on.
By the final snack stop before the King, their actor’s change the script again. Siffrin tensed, their hand tracing the handle of their dagger in case of emergency. Odile… odile doesn’t call out suspicious connections to time craft this time. Everyone just.. Just asks him to nap.
The third floor they had fumbled the most, their quick grabs at the keys became more clumsy against his will. His hands can’t stop shaking. The aches won’t cease their whining in his body. Change, of course they noticed, they aren’t blind. The script is similar, repeating the words that simultaneously warm his body and send nausea through it. They’re a family. They care.
Absently, Siffrin notes Mira’s asking him if he’ll accept a comb, again. At least that’s familiar. At least one of them new the script to stick to. And, he really wouldn’t mind it again. The loops reset his hair back to the tangled and knotted mess it was when he startled back to awareness in Dormont. Everytime. Sometimes they briefly wondered if Mirabelle would comb their hair out back in town too. They would never ask though.
Their family quietly chated as Mirabelle combed through his hair. Gently, dare they think lovingly. Careful not to hurt him. Like he’s fragile and weak. Pathetic. They are pathetic aren’t they. For wanting this. Selfish for forcing them. Their hands continued to tremble, as much as Siff tried to suppress it.
The Fighter changes the script first. First to notice. Notice a slip up. They tense, not for any particular reason just, they don’t know this script. The Fighter’s face is concerned but softens. Isa. Isa asked hesitantly it he could see their hands. Siff let him, letting their pathetic shaking hands be engulfed in Isa’s large ones. He hesitantly rubs their knuckles, Mira continues to brush the tangles out of their hair. Siff’s eyelid got heavier, their body screaming to just let go, just relax. They haven’t reached the king yet, the head housemaid, they can’t yet.
When they heard Odile close her book, another off script action, they jolted up and looked her way. Odile was about to speak up, but hesitated at their startled form. Her concerned and piercing expression remained.
“Siffrin, did you get any rest at all last night?”
They stop and meekly speak up, “I slept..”
“That’s not what I asked.”
Siffrin grimaced, tensing up. “I got.. Some rest. Why do you ask?”
“The fumbling around and absent performance don’t suggest you did.”
She had them there. Their fingers twitch as they internally remind themselves their dagger is still on their person. Even if their hands are occupied with being held by Isa’s. They take a breath.
The other actors contribute, sharing their nerves about facing the King. Needing to be ready before confronting the Threat, that could be their final standing place. No. No they won’t fail. They won’t die here. He might, but he won’t let his family.
Odile is actually the first to suggest Siffrin rest before they face the King. They can’t have any weak links before such a moment. Weak members. Weak. They were clumsy this loop. Their other family members share in the sentiment. They probably think he’s weak too. Their concerned smiles are hard to say no to though. The aches and exhaustion overwhelming his body probably wouldn’t let him refuse such an opportunity either. Surely. Surely they went through the first couple floors quick enough that another fifteen minutes before the king wouldn’t be too long. Right?
It’s a thought that didn’t seem to cross his family member’s faces when he gave into their requests and laid down. Mira scooted over, getting started on the next clump of tangled hair. Isa offered his lap as a pillow, and Siffrin’s slow mind just. Accepts the request. Not noting the dark shade flooding The Fighter’s face as they dragged their body to his lap, their head and partial upper body relaxing immediately. They rest their head on their blind side, one hand interlaced with The Fighter’s, behind them Mira finishing off the last of their tangles. The concern from their family’s faces hasn’t completely disappeared, but it’s eased. And that is enough to release the remaining tension in his body. It’s enough.
Their family makes a few jokes that their brain muffles. Some laughing. Bonnie’s working on their snacks in the corner, still. They’ll be ready when they wake up. Their legs adjusted and placed in someone else’s lap, they think. Whoever it was, rubs circles into their calf. His eyelid grows heavier, their breathes come easy. Deep breaths. Someone rubs their back.
It’s nice. Really.. really nice. One could easily forget they were even about to face the King at all. Face the end. They close their eyelid. It’s warm. One breath in. And out. Just.. just a quick nap. Where they are loved. They.. they are loved right? This is what this means… at least right now…
Yeah. They hope this is right.
Sleep engulfs them for the first time in several loops and their breaths slow.
The chatting continues around him, not lacking some glances exchanged between the adults in the room. But mostly, just relief fills the air. Mira stayed by Siffrin’s side, threading her fingers through his now completely combed out hair. The flush in Isabeau’s cheeks still hadn’t fully left, every movement reminding him of his crush resting so peacefully in his lap. Like a sleeping cat that once it has claimed you as it’s cushion, you are bound by the universe to not move for any reason. Odile didn’t pass up the opportunity to tease him, met with Isa’s shushing and hushed whisper “what if he wakes up and hears you!!”
Siff had done a lot today, and everyone would have assumed he was completely calm about fighting the king if not for his uncharacteristic clumsiness. Mirabelle supposed it made sense though. A night of rough sleep right before facing the most dangerous threat facing the country? That would make anyone mess up.
After another twenty minutes, Bonnie comes over with the freshly prepared snacks. Made extra special since they were more ahead of schedule than expected. Last hurrah before the king, everyone needed to be at their best.
Mirabelle smiles, heading over to were Bonnie had announced the snacks. Isa attempts to move but flounders at the idea of moving Siff. Mirabelle giggles at his flushing face as Odile moves their legs out of their lap. Well, time to end their nap she supposes. Their sleepy family member probably won’t be too thrilled about waking up but it is snack time.
Mirabelle collects her choice of snack and crouches over to Siff, moving their hat from where it had obscured their resting expression. Isa looked both upset to have the time his crush sleeps on their lap come to an end, and relieved. He lets out a chuckle as Mira gently shakes their shoulder.
“Time to wake up, Siffrin! Bonnie has snacks for everyone.” Mira moves a few hairs out of their face. “Siffrin?”
Isabeau adjusts, and joins in. “Siff? Sorry to wake you bud but..” He pauses, seeing Mirabelle’s face shift. Odile’s gaze sharpens as Mirabelle’s leans over them, placing her ear to their chest.
“They- th-they aren’t” Mira cries out. “They aren’t breathing! No no no-”
Isabeau moves Siffrin off his lap with shaking hands. Odile rushes over to their side, checking their wrist and neck for a pulse. Bonnie’s face crumbles in the corner, alarm replacing the happy air.
Isabeau shakes Siffrin’s still body, Mirabelle readies a heal craft as Odile begins to try resuscitating them.
but
the
world
goes
blank
Siffrin first feels the gentle breeze around them. The grass moving in tune, sometimes brushing up against the small areas their clothes don’t cover. They hear Mirabelle in the distance and when they open their eyes, she’s right above them, apologetic for waking them. Siffrin blinks. It’s been a while since Mira’s been the one to wake them up.
“Good morning! Well, more like good afternoon, I gue- wow. Are you okay?”
That’s new. Why would her lines-
“You’re crying.. Is something wrong, Siffrin?”
He blinks and brings a hand to his face. Sure enough, his cheek is stained with tears. He doesn’t remember crying, he just woke up too. From..
“Must’ve happened in my sleep” He says absently.
Mira frowns, “Oh no! What did you dream about…?”
Siffrin shrugs and repeats lines he remembers that will reassure her the quickest. She sighs and returns back to town. They’ll be waiting for him.
He takes a moment to think about what happened in the last loop. He.. doesn’t remember dying. Must have been when he went to sleep. That. That probably should worry him, that falling asleep could end a loop, but he doesn’t feel any regret about it. Actually, it’d be nice if all his loops ended like that. Just, dying with his loved ones around. It would take too long though, even if it could happen again. This loop needs to be faster. Last loop they didn’t even reach the king, and they have questions.
He grumbles as he sits up, a part of him yearning to go back to that warmth. Oh if only the universe could have let it be permanent. A permanent death that didn’t even hurt. That’s wishful thinking though, the universe isn’t so kind. And they have work to do, his family- actors. They need what he knows. He can’t rest forever yet.
The show must go on.
#in stars and time#my art#my writing#MDN art tag#isat#in stars and time spoilers#isat spoilers#isat siffrin#isat mirabelle#isat isabeau#isafrin#isat bonnie#isat odile#mirabelle#isabeau#siffrin#isat fanart#fanfic#fanfiction#fanart#isabeau x siffrin#siffrin x isabeau#isasif
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What would've should've been
Pairing: Theodore Nott x fem!ravenclaw!reader
Summary: Theodore Nott didn't truly know what love felt like until he found you. But now all he can do is sit and imagine what should've been.
Warnings: Mentions of death/killing, Battle of Hogwarts, use of Y/N
Word Count: 2.3k
Before You
Theodore Nott isn't the happiest person in the world. Scratch that, he might be the most subdued, emotionally complex guy to have ever existed. Hardly anything made him smile, next to nothing made him laugh. That's just how he was, is, and how he will always be.
It isn't completely his fault. People are never born 'sad' or 'emotionless'. Theo was brought up this way. It was ingrained into him as a child, silently impacting his life forever, and he didn't even realise it. Well, that was until his mother died. At the hands of his father.
Theodore's mother was a gentle soul. Sweet and caring, she always looked after her son. She gave him everything a child needed, wanted, and then some. The one thing she couldn't provide for Theo? A stable father, who wasn't an alcoholic, abusive pig. Though she did try, the fear she had of Theodore's father never ceased throughout their marriage. She just had to try to shelter Theodore from this cold, uncaring lifestyle.
She could only protect her son so much. When Theodore was just nine years old, she couldn't take the abuse from his father anymore. So she tried to escape. From her house, from her husband, from her life. Yet she failed. And he found out. Theodore Nott Sr. was not happy with this. So he did the only thing that he thought could ease his troubles. He killed his wife. The mother of his child. The child that had heard the Unforgiveable Curse uttered from his father's lips. The child who watched the flash of green light emitted from his father's wand. The child who had to watch his own mother, the only person who truly cared for him, die.
When he started Hogwarts, Theodore wanted a somewhat fresh start. Free from the burdens of his home life, he made friends.(Arguably, they were friends who his father would have approved of. If his father even cared.) At school, Theodore worked hard, and tried to mask the emotions he had always been told to oppress. Anger. Hatred. Vulnerability. So none of his friends truly knew what his life was like. Except for Lorenzo.
Theo told Enzo Berkshire everything. It was easier, having someone understand why you were like you were. Someone who you trusted with your deepest, darkest secrets. Someone who cared about you. That's how the two became best friends. Practically inseparable, 24/7.
During You
Having a connection with someone was something Theodore didn't truly seek throughout his lifetime. Especially now, in his fourth year at Hogwarts. Apart from Enzo, he was fine with keeping to himself, keeping a low profile and staying out of everyone's way. That was, until he saw you.
"Enzo, I don't want to go."
"Please, Theo, I want you to come. I'll be lonely without you." Enzo pleaded with his friend.
"I don't want to go to the Yule Ball. And besides, I didn't ask anyone to go with me." Theodore replied, still resisting the idea.
"So? No-one really cares if you're with someone or not. It's supposed to be fun." Enzo says with a sigh as he flops down next to Theo on his bed.
Theo scoffs. "Says you! How many girls asked you to go with them? 15?"
Lorenzo turns slightly pink at his friend's comment. "23..."
Theo lets out an exasperated sigh. "Exactly," Theo says, but after a moment he decides, "I will go to the ball with you Enz. Only because it's that, or sit around here or in the common room with all the first years."
So, that was how he ended up standing at the side of the Great Hall, sipping a glass of pumpkin juice, and watching all of his friends dancing with whoever they brought to the Ball. Theo didn't really mind. Once again, he was merely waiting in the wings, not really expecting anything grand to happen to him. At least, that's what he thought would happen. Until he saw you.
You were with some of your friends on the dancefloor. Laughing and smiling, you were carefree, living your life to it's full potential. Theo couldn't bear to take his eyes off of you. It's not like you would have seen him anyway, with him lurking in the shadows.
After he had spent what felt like forever watching you, Enzo came to his friend's side, offering a new glass of pumpkin juice, which Theo gladly accepted.
"Who's that?" Theo asked his friend, nodding his head in your direction.
"That's Y/N. Y/L/N I think. She's in Ravenclaw. She's actually quite clever, I sat next to her in arithmancy last year." Enzo pauses for a second. "Why do you want to know?"
"I don't know," Theo shrugs, nonchalant. "I just... don't remember seeing her before, that's all."
"Oh. Well, she's really kind. And sweet." Enzo smiles before rushing of again to resume dancing, leaving Theo to mull over his thoughts. Thoughts of you.
A week later, whilst sat in Potions, Theodore couldn't help but watch you, sitting across from him in the classroom. Strange. He had never noticed you before, but now it seemed you were the only thing plaguing his mind. He hardly took any notice of Professor Snape that lesson, watching you as you took notes with your brow furrowed, and how you twirled your quill around in your fingertips if you seemed distracted.
Over the next few weeks, Theodore Nott grew to know lots about you, even if you didn't yet realise it. He knew your favourite subject (Charms), your favourite sweets from Honeydukes (Chocolate Frogs, because you collected the cards). He even knew how you liked to spend your Sundays (sat in the courtyard with a book and a hot chocolate). Theo was drawn to you, for some unknown reason, and not even he could figure out why.
In the weeks leading up to your exams, you spent an increasing amount of time in the library, studying. Funnily enough, so did Theodore. He wanted to do well academically, even if his friends preferred skiving off and messing with first years. So, that was how he came to speak to you for the first time, five whole months after he was first captivated by you.
"Can I sit here? All the other tables are either occupied or slightly sticky and I don't want to mess up my books"
"Uhh, sure!" Theodore said, shocked that you had even come over to him. "No," he told himself. "She's only over here because nowhere else was free. Don't get your hopes up."
"I'm Y/N, by the way." You smile at him, and wave your wand to get your books laid out on the desk in front of you.
"Theodore. But you can call me Theo." Theodore said, as he found himself smiling in return.
The two of you started to talk about anything and everything; school, exams, your hobbies, interests, just your lives in general. And that's how Theo realised that, maybe he wasn't such a cold, uncaring teenager after all.
A week or so later, the two of you were sat under the shade of an oak tree overlooking the Black Lake, studying for, you guessed it, exams. That moment was when Theo finally plucked up enough courage to ask you something.
"Hey, Y/N?" he asked, taking a deep breath.
"What?" you replied, looking up from your book.
"I was wondering, would you maybe like to, and it's OK if you don't, I don't mind, you don't have to say yes or anything because it's completely your choice-"
"Spit it out, Theo!" you giggled, humoured by his rambling.
"Right. Sorry." Theo said, trying to calm himself down. "Umm, would you like to go to Hogsmeade with me next weekend? And could we possibly go to the Three Broomsticks? You know, just... us?"
Your eyes widened, before you smiled at the boy's worried expression. "Of course! Theo I'd love to."
You wrapped your arms around him and gave him a small kiss on the cheek before returning to your book, leaving Theodore grinning as if he'd just won the lottery. Which, with you, he basically had.
After You
It had been a while since Theodore Nott had been back at Hogwarts. Since he had gotten the Dark Mark, at his father's force, he had stayed working for The Dark Lord, being a Death Eater. He hated it. It was a life his father had forced him into, a life which wasn't truly his. And now he was back at the one place which had been a home to him, but now he was here to destroy it.
Theo tried to look for you. The one person who he trusted, and the one person who trusted him. Theo wasn't here to fight. He wasn't here to kill. He couldn't do that here. His safe place, where his father couldn't physically torture him. Where you were.
Before his sixth year at Hogwarts, Theo was held under the Imperius curse by his father, and the searing skull tattoo, the tattoo that would hurt him forever, was imprinted into his left arm. When school started again, he couldn't bear to tell you, his girlfriend, what had happened. But he did, because between you two, there were no secrets. When you found out, all you were was supportive. You helped Theo though his pain and anguish, but what he didn't know is that when you first found out, you cried for hours. Crying about his future, your future, angry at the world you live in for being so cruel. Crying was really the only thing you could do.
After Dumbledore's death, Theodore did what he thought would be best for your relationship, best for you.
"You can't be serious, Theodore?" you said, trying to keep your voice levelled and clear, holding back the tears.
That hurt Theo. You never called him Theodore, unless you were really frustrated. Which hadn't happened until now. "Y/N please, I have to, it's for your safety."
"My SAFETY? Theo, I couldn't care less about that right now. Please, don't do this." You couldn't hold back any longer. The tears were now streaming down your face.
"I don't want to, but-"
"But what, Theo? I love you!"
"I love you too, but-"
"Then surely that's all that matter?" you say, exasperated. "We love each other. We can run away together, and live in hiding until it's safe for us to come out, to be together."
"No, we can't, you know we can't, we'll be found and then... you'd... You'd be killed." Theo says in a small voice. "And I can't let that happen to you. Please, Y/N, just listen to me. As soon as this is over, we can get back together. We can live together, start over together. But it can't happen now. Not yet. Please, Y/N, wait for me."
You can't stop crying now, and you lean over to Theo and kiss him. "OK. When it's all over. I'll be waiting for you, Theo. You'll definitely come back to me?"
"Of course I will, Y/N. I promise I'll find you."
And of course, that's what he was currently doing. Looking for you. He had been waiting a year to see your face again, hoping you hadn't forgotten about him. However now he couldn't find you. Running through the corridors, shouting you name, dodging curses and rubble, Theo's only goal was to find you. And he did.
There you were at the top of the Astronomy tower, a split lip and wearing a torn blue jumper, you were aiming all sorts of hexes at a Death Eater. Theo was so relieved, and began firing spells at your opponent, until he was knocked unconscious. At that point, Theo kicked the limp body over the balcony, not caring what would happen.
"Y/N." Theo smiled. "I told you I'd come back."
You pulled Theo into a hug and kissed him. "Theo!" you breathed.
"I love you more than anything, Y/N." All Theo could do was look into your bright, tearful eyes, relieved that he could see you once again before-
"AVADA KEDAVRA!"
That fateful curse.
A flash of green light.
Your body fell limp in Theo's arms.
Your eyes lost their brightness.
"NO!"
Theo tried to pull you up, tried to hold you tight, but it was no use. You were gone. Theo looked up to see your murderer, looking him in the eyes. His father.
Your death at the hands of Nott Sr. ensured Nott Sr.'s death at the hands of his son. That was the first and last time that Theodore Nott would ever use the killing curse, and it only made sense for it to be on the person that used it on the two people who he had loved most in the world.
When the Battle of Hogwarts was over, most of Voldemort's supporters were dead, captured, or had fled the scene when it was evident that they were losing. But two Death Eaters stayed behind, simply because they couldn't bear to leave the castle like this. They felt it was partly their fault. Those two Death Eaters were Theodore Nott and Lorenzo Berkshire.
Whilst everyone gathered in the Great Hall, Enzo wandered the, now ruined, corridors of a place he loved so dearly. What he didn't expect to find his best friend, leaning on the crumbled wall of the Astronomy tower, cradling someone in his arms. Not to mention the fact that his father lay on the ground mere feet away.
"Please, Y/N, you can't be dead, you can't. I came back for you I-"
"Theo?" Enzo inquired, sitting on the floor next to his best friend, who was in fits of tears.
"He killed her, Enz. He killed her so- So I killed him. I had to."
"It's OK, Theo." Enzo replied, putting an arm around his friend's shoulder, and letting him cry.
The pair fell into a comfortable silence, with the sound of everyone in the castle talking and grieving the loss of friends and family. The two could have been down there with them, celebrating the demise of the people who made their lives hell.
But instead, all Theodore Nott could think about is what should've been.
#slytherin#slytherin boys#theodore nott#harry potter#harry potter universe#lorenzo berkshire#theo nott#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x reader#y/n#theo nott x reader#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin x reader#x reader#fem reader#x female reader#ravenclaw#slytherclaw#battle of hogwarts#hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry#hogwarts houses#wizarding world#sad fanfiction#fanfiction#fanfic#enzo berkshire
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The Flower That Bloomed Nowhere
What is it, and why you should read it.
(Art by purple)
The Flower That Bloomed Nowhere is a currently updating webserial by author Lurina. It's one of my favorite things I've read in a long while and I'd like to convince you all to give it a chance.
My elevator pitch is this: A time-loop murder mystery directly inspired by Umineko, with a lot of similar vibes to the Locked Tomb Trilogy - partially due to it's meditations on grief and mortality and partially due to it's far-future magical sci-fi world where we follow a fucked up lesbian necromancer on a task she is determined to see through to the end. A deeply complex, unique, and believable world that plays hosts to one of the best interpersonal dynamics I've read.
In a future so far-flung that it is past the heat death of the universe, humanity has constructed a new society that is post-scarcity but not post-stratification. Utsushikome of Fusai is one amongst a class of prodigious young medical arcanists (essentially grad students) who are invited to visit a recently legitimized conclave of top-of-the-line researchers studying immortality. Accompanying Su is her best friend Ran, a fellow arcanist. Over the course of the novel we begin to slowly unravel exactly what ulterior motives have brought them to this conclave and how events in their childhoods and years of working toward their shared goal has warped their relationship into what we now see. This relationship is the crown jewel of Flower's narrative, and getting to peel back the layers of it as you read is a delight.
Like Umineko, Flower is a murder mystery that prevents itself with in-universe Rules that dictate the murders' parameters, meaning there's a lot to chew on for anyone who likes solving mysteries. For those that don't, like myself, Flower offers instead a richly developed world and plenty of open questions about the sociopolitical and metaphysical implications of its own worldbuilding.
Below the cut, I'll go into more detail about the series (without spoilers!) for those of you whose interest has been piqued.
The Flower That Bloomed Nowhere is currently ongoing, updating every few weeks. It's several hundred thousand words, so if you're looking for something substantial to keep you entertained, you've got it. As you might expect from the length, the pacing is decently slow. I don't see this as a bad thing at all, because within this pacing Lurina dripfeeds the readers enough new and interesting information at a regular rate that it never feels like your time is being wasted. But if you can't handle slow burns, I wouldn't recommend this one for you.
If you enjoyed the Zero Escape series and liked that they stopped solving murder puzzles to infodump about fringe science, I think you'll get a lot out of Flower. Characters are frequently interrupting their life-or-death scenarios to have lofty, philosophical and political discussions. It's a ton of fun if you like reading characters argue.
'People have to sleep.' 'People have to work.' 'People have to die.' But those were just vague rules, phrasing I'd used because it had been easier in the context of that conversation. What really mattered, on the day-to-day level, was the idea that it was all for something. If someone invented a elixir that made people not to need to sleep, it would, in retrospect, recontextualize all nights everyone ever wasted sleeping as wastes of time. Not something that occurred for some inherent purpose, but whims of circumstance, a tragedy of when you happened to be born. If you accepted that all unfair things in the world could be removed, if only someone knew how - fatigue, labor, death - then to exist in the world we had now, with all its grotesque imperfections, was to know that you had been violated by fate.
Along those lines it's just got a sense of humor I really enjoy. Pretty dry and cavalier. It manages to keep the mood light without feeling like it's undermining it's own stakes. I'm particularly fond of Su's penchant for telling incredibly depressing suicide jokes that just Do Not Land.
The peer pressure cut into me like a hot knife. I hesitated a little, biting my lip. "Well, uh, okay. I'll just tell a quick one." I swallowed, my mind quickly scrambling. "Okay, so, there's a woman who runs a dispensary for second hand goods. She sees a man come in who's a regular customer. He's kind of a mess-- Has a big beard, a bad complexion. He buys a razor, and tells her he needs it to clean himself up, because he has a date." I could see that I now had Ophelia's attention and that Kam was looking pleased with herself, but Ran was watching me, too. I could see the look in her eyes. It screamed at me, with such vividity that it could be sold at an art gallery: You better not be telling a suicide joke right now, or we're going to have a talk. But it was too late. The wheels were already in motion.
As I mentioned up top, the relationship between Ran and Su is just one of my favorite interpersonal dynamics ever. Period. The author is playing some insanely complicated 5th dimensional yuri chess and I am absolutely here for it as someone who likes characters who are deeply devoted to each other in a way that is deeply deeply fraught. I cant emphasize enough how obsessed I am with what they have going on.
Additionally, as stated, the worldbuilding in Flower is top tier. The author clearly understands how every part of her world functions, which makes the moral quandaries and politics presented all the more impactful because they're very believable. It's hard to talk about Flower's world without spoiling too much of the specifics that get slowly revealed, but it doesn't fall back on any typical sci-fi standard fare and feels like a breath of fresh air amongst recycled and repetitive worldbuilding tropes.
A lot of really fun side characters. Strong voices for all of the supporting cast (♥♥Kamrusepa♥♥) and even though not every character gets their own arc, they all clearly have plenty of interiority. Once again, another thing that makes Flower feel very believable despite it's absurdities.
Autism
"Did you notice anything out of the ordinary with anyone?" She eyed him. "Anyone who seemed tense?" "Saoite, I'm not sure if you've noticed, but half of our class is so autistic that they constantly seem tense. You might as well ask me to find a specific turd in a sewer." "Just answer the question, please," she replied flatly.
Guys it's really good just trust me I don't want to spoil you for the more intricate plot beats but they're doing some crazy shit here. It's never a bad time to support an independent author's project. If you're sick of corporate mass-media and stuff needing to be marketable, getting into independent works owned and supported by individual creators is a great way to push back against that. I highly recommend it.
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𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐁𝐈𝐃𝐃𝐄𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐂𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒.
All sentences and quotes have been taken from different media about starcrossed lovers or forbidden love, full of angst, some bold words, some nasty ones, possessive nature and letting someone use you as a replacement. So, some toxic energy in this one. Change pronouns, locations and names as you see fit.
I love you,and I will love you until I die,and if there's a life after that,I'll love you then.
Do people always fall in love with things they can't have?
And there is a difference between having your heart break and having your soul shatter.
I'm falling in love with you.
I'm going to fuck the shit out of you. I have waited for this for such a long time. Consequences be damned.
These violent delights have violent ends.
I’m only human. And you are …all-consuming.
Don’t go into this lightly. If you’re mine, you need to understand I will burn the fucking world to the ground for you.
I will never let you go, do you hear me?
will keep you safe. And I will find a way for us to be together.
If you make me cry at my own coronation ball, I’ll never forgive you.
If you were any less the man you are, I would beg you to take me with you.
If you were any less the woman you were, I would beg you to come with me.
I've known lust. This is something worse. This is a barbaric need to possess, to eliminate, to own. This is madness.
This is lust.
She’s your very own forbidden fruit.
You said you didn't want this.
We all desire what we cannot have.
Have you noticed how the boy looks at you?
Do you think I didn’t notice? The way you look at me when you think I’m not watching?
You are dangerous desire, and I am your prisoner.
We can’t do this on so many levels.
I can't even whisper her name, my heart would burst out of my chest.
But I would fight against the stars for you.
I have ruined your life.
Some lines you just don't cross.
I want to take you under the moonlight.
Having something forbidden is exciting, don't you agree?
The closer we get—the more I let you in…the more dangerous this gets.
Don’t you get it? You’re what everyone wants! But I’m not going to let them win.
Make it so I never have to dream about this again—make it so we can have this…forever.
Desires are what can most easily ruin us, lovely.
We were doomed from the start.
Nothing is as deadly as the love of a powerful man.
But this kiss? It's ruined me. This is the type of kiss I never knew existed.
You sure about that, Dad? Because he's done everything to me.
Are you scared of me now?
You loved me - then what right had you to leave me?
I have not broken your heart - you have broken it; and in breaking it, you have broken mine.
One moment, you give me everything that I want, and in the next, you snatch all of that away.
It's hopeless. We can never work out.
The world didn’t want us together so I forged a new one where we would.
How could a peacock lust for a lion?
You're tattooed onto my skin, and the more I try to erase you, the deeper you sink in.
I’ve always liked you, from the first moment I saw you.
It's absurd how crazy love can make you...but even more absurd how stupid jealousy can make you.
That you and I are meant to be together, but never meant to be.
Why does fate seem always to conspire against us? To deny us life's simple pleasures?
We'll meet after this war. I'll certainly find you wherever you'll hide.
War makes fools of men and women wanton.
What offends you most, Father? That she's Catholic, or that she's poor?
If my father discovers you here, he'd cut off your little nuts and eat them. He can't stand you.
You tempress, I see you once and all I can think of is having you.
Feelings are forbidden, does not mean we cannot enjoy one another.
The more you deny me, the more I desire you. You are a plague in my mind.
Ever since we met, no one else can compare.
How can I be with someone else, when I’m with them, it’s you I see.
You can have me, think of whoever you love. For tonight.
You can pretend I'm her/him. I don't care. I just want you.
#roleplay memes#sentence meme#( cali meme. )#rp memes#rp prompt#rp musings#roleplay prompt#forbidden love#starcrossed lovers
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I believe Aang was right to end the war by sparing Ozai. But the only (imho) valid reason some people say he should have done it is because they wanted Aang to realize that pacifism is flawed.
I'm gonna disagree with you here, because a lot of the flaws fans talk about pacism and how ATLA in particular handles it as a concept are 99%:
1 - People being ignorant/racist and not knowing the difference between pacifist monks and "make love, not war" hippies.
2 - People being ignorant/racist and refusing to understand that there are different kinds of pacifism, even within the same cultures/people groups.
Aang is very clearly not the type of pacifist to go "You can NEVER react with ANY kind of violence towards someone else, even if it's to defend yourself/someone else" (which does exist, both IRL and in the show, just look at the owl spirit in "The Library").
We see him fight, and even be quite aggressive in said fights, in a lot of episodes. We also see he has no issues with invading the Fire Nation. More importantly, for the longest time the Avatar State was a result of him being pissed off enough at some kind of injustice that it makes him lose control, meaning he is very clearly affected by the horrors of war to the point of RAGE.
What makes him a pacifist is the way in which he doesn't WANT to lose control, doens't WANT go from aggressive to full on cruel, and, yes, wants to defeat his enemies, but not kill them.
And as I keep repeating, the show DOES make him question that last boundary he set for himself. He gets told by a past Avatar, who was also an air-nomad before anything, that, when there is such a large threat to everyone's life, including his own, he has to put aside his own spiritual needs and take a life - provided there isn't another option. But there was, so Aang took that, even after he decided that, yes, if there was no other way, he WOULD kill Ozai.
What people don't like is that Avatar, although questioning some types of pacifism, is far more interested in questioning the way people are WAY too eager to use violence to solve their issues, and, more importantly, expect someone else to get their hands bloody.
Fire Lord Sozin starts the war because he, according to himself at least, wants what's best for everyone and would like to share the Fire Nation's glory and great life with the other nations. He tries to do by invading foreign territories, killing his best friend, and commiting genocide. The fucker even has the dragons, an obvious Fire Nation symbol, to be hunted to extintion.
When Jet is angry at the Gaang for ruining his plan to free a village from the Fire Nation's control by blowing up a dam, Sokka asks "Who would be free? Everyone would be dead."
Zuko is banished because he spoke out against a Fire Nation higher-up's plan to use soldiers as fresh meat to bait the enemy into a more vulnerable position, thus assuring the nation's victory in that battle. He openly says "These men love and defend our nation, how can you betray them?"
When Zhao wants to kill the moon spirit, Iroh tries to stop him by pointing out that the Fire Nation needs the moon too (seriously, if it wasn't for Yue's sacrifice and Zhao's death, the Fire Nation would have had to create a word for "Big-ass wave that wrecks everything and kills people" like Japan did).
When Aang is deliberately trying to trigger the Avatar State because he doesn't want anyone else to die in the war, Katara, who had her life ruined by said war, is against it because while she opposes the Fire Nation, she cares about Aang and, in her own words, seeing him in so much pain and rage hurts her too. When Aang can't force himself to go nuclear, an Earth Kingdom ruler attacks Katara and makes both her and Aang, two very traumatized child soldiers, think he is going to kill her.
More importantly, when Ozai wants to burn down Earth Kingdom cities, he says "A new world will rise from the ashes, and I'll be supreme ruler of everything", to which Zuko concludes that, if they don't save the world before his dad takes over, there won't be a world to save.
And what does he say to Aang when he is about to kill him? "You're weak, just like your people. They didn't deserve to live in world, in my world."
Avatar does questions pacifism, and is critical of it on ocasion (again, watch "The Library"). But it's biggest theme is being critical of VIOLENCE, of resorting to it immediately without considering any other option and acting like it doesn't have long-lasting negative consequences, both to the person suffering it to the person inflicting it (see Azula's breakdown, Zuko's angry outburts only making him more miserable, Jeong Jeong growing to resent being a firebender, Zhao accidentally burning his own ships, etc)
The show is constantly highlighting that, yes, sacrifices need to be made for the greater good - but that CAN'T be normalized because it inevitably leads to a never-ending cicle of cruelty, as well as suffering to the one who has to do the dirty job (because lets not forget there's a big difference in how a soldier that is constantly in battle sees the war and how a king that just gives the orders but never goes into the actual combat sees the war).
The show embraces pacifism, despite knowing some versions of it are flawed, because the narratives themes are:
1 - EVERYONE is capable of great good and great evil
2 - No group has the right to impose it's own lifestyle onto others
3 - If everyone is either dead, mentally (and physically) scarred for life, or preparing to kill someone as revenge, then being killed by someone who wants to avenge that person, who will themselves be killed for revenge later, then the "greater good" you're sacrificing everything for doesn't actually exist because NO ONE will have a good life in a world that is stuck in the cicle of violence.
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&. 𝐟𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐬𝐚 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.
( dialogue prompts taken from furiosa: a mad max story (2024), directed by george miller. feel free to edit and change as you seem fit. )
❛ as the world falls around us, how must we brave its cruelties? ❜
❛ we should go back now. ❜
❛ i'll come with you. ❜
❛ the stars be with you. ❜
❛ who's coming for us? ❜
❛ who do we have here? ❜
❛ what do they call you? ❜
❛ now, you have had a hard day, haven't you? you must be exhausted. ❜
❛ there's only one thing i need you to do and that is rest. ❜
❛ you don't have to say a word, i promise. ❜
❛ tomorrow, i'll take you home. ❜
❛ keep an eye on her, keep her safe. ❜
❛ you're bleeding. ❜
❛ i'm not gonna leave you. ❜
❛ whatever you have to do, however long it takes, promise me you’ll find your way home. ❜
❛ no, no, no. don’t look away. we mustn’t look away. ❜
❛ why would you run from me? ❜
❛ you’re gonna have to show me who you are. ❜
❛ you don’t have to watch if you don’t want to. ❜
❛ you may wanna close your eyes. ❜
❛ you will rule with me in the splendor of a new wasteland. ❜
❛ i’m afraid for you, sweetheart. really afraid. ❜
❛ witness me! ❜
❛ you’re all fools for coming here. ❜
❛ when things go bonkers, you have to adapt. ❜
❛ she looks nothing like you. ❜
❛ she has her mother’s perfections, and none of my deficiencies. ❜
❛ she’s perfect. not like the genetic absurdities you have for sons. ❜
❛ would you like to stay here in the citadel? ❜
❛ if i let you stay and you grow to become a strong, healthy woman, you could become one of our wives. ❜
❛ no! she’s not for sale, she’s mine. ❜
❛ you behave, i’ll behave. ❜
❛ where have i seen you before? ❜
❛ we're going to build ourselves a war rig. ❜
❛ he done the most runs on the fury road. and brung back the booty every time. ❜
❛ eyes left. they’re flanking us. ❜
❛ you’re going to pull over and get out. ❜
❛ where did you think you were going? ❜
❛ there is nowhere else. this is the wasteland. wherever you thought you were going does not exist. ❜
❛ i lost my convoy. i lost my crew. i’m gonna have to start again. and i’m driving off thinking i ought to start with you. ❜
❛ you may be raw, but you have about you a purposeful savagery. ❜
❛ you give me time, i’ll teach you everything you need to know about road war. ❜
❛ if you survive everything we take on together, you’ll have all the skills you need to get wherever you wanna go. ❜
❛ keep it. you’ll need it. ❜
❛ for you. for your travels. you’re done here. you’re free to go. ❜
❛ food, water, wheels, whatever you need. i'll help you put it together. give me a couple of days. ❜
❛ i want what you want. a full belly... and a fistful of bullets for a tank of gas. ❜
❛ we’re not leaving without our tankers full of gas. ❜
❛ you wanna get out of here, follow me. ❜
❛ let’s kill him. right now. ❜
❛ this place at the end of your map of secrets... where is it? ❜
❛ i wanna help you find this place. wherever it may be. ❜
❛ come with me. ❜
❛ there is no hope! not for them, not for you! certainly not for me! ❜
❛ it’s the price we all pay to survive in the wasteland. we cannot be soft! ❜
❛ stay! you’ll find peace here. ❜
❛ if you find him, he’s mine. ❜
❛ gentlemans, it’s time. time to do war. ❜
❛ here, no time for long goodbyes. we’ve done some mighty things together. goodbye. ❜
❛ you’ve found me. ❜
❛ you could have necked me in the night, but you didn’t. ❜
❛ i have nothing. i am nothing. ❜
❛ remember me? ❜
❛ you crawled out of a pitiless grave, deeper than hell. and only one thing’s gonna do that for you. and not hope. hate. ❜
❛ no shame in hate. it's one of the great forces of nature. ❜
❛ so... this is the day i die. i’ve always wondered how. ❜
❛ my childhood. my mother. i want them back. ❜
❛ i'm right there, i’m right there with you. i too craved nothing but revenge. ❜
❛ if the shooter goes around the back, the shootee won’t know the precise moment of the execution. ❜
❛ what you want, dear, are my cries of anguish. anguish without end. and if i could give you that, i would. ❜
❛ if you can’t do me quick, you’ll have to do me slow. ❜
❛ i’ve been waiting for someone like you, someone worthy of me. ❜
❛ no honor, no rule of law to sort things out. just two evil bastards out here in the wasteland. ❜
❛ you do this, you do this right, you become me. ❜
❛ i am nothing like you. ❜
❛ you are me. already dead. ❜
❛ to feel alive, we seek sensation. any sensation to wash away the cranky black sorrow. ❜
❛ the question is... do you have it in you to make it epic? ❜
#furiosa#sentence starters#inbox memes#ask memes#rp memes#roleplay memes#roleplay prompts#dialogue prompts#random dialogue#movies
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What about Monster!AU for prompt 5. Male reader and price please :)
Sure thing anon, made it a mage reader again, was trying to study for a 'lovely' surprise test but inspiration decided to strike me :/. Play the game HERE
Prompt: “My feelings aren’t real and my heart’s a fucking idiot.”
CW:NSFW, switch/power bottom Dragon Price, Male Mage reader, Oral, Anal, shower sex, semi public sex, reader is oblivious for a bit.
Price swears his hair and scales are going to go completely gray because of you.
You've been avoiding him for a week now, and all the base knows why — Price can still hear your desperate voice begging and bargaining with whatever will listen "I'll buy you dinner please-just stay alive- I love you- damn it you slimy bastard don't you dare die on me-" as you try to keep him alive, magic flowing from your arms to heal the gaping hole in his side despite the bullets raining overhead; a valiant knight protecting him like he's a prince instead of a dragon.
And Price can remember the way his heart had fluttered at your words, at the way you had hugged him so firmly to keep him safe as your magic raged all around you like a wild force of nature, at the way you looked at him so tenderly— eyes burning with mana like the gaze of a god he's your most prized possession —right before the blood loss made him black out.
But now that Price was out of the hospital, his side permanently marked with your magic and a hefty load of paperwork on his desk, you were acting like you never said anything. Anytime someone brings it up you just ignore them, ignore him, throwing yourself into training as much as you can. And it's getting on his nerves, his draconic blood making anger and malcontent burn in his bones because you'd looked at him like a mate but now it's like he doesn't exist beyond training and missions.
He knows it's against the rules, knows he shouldn't hope for much when he sets out to find you, but he does. It's not hard; though his sensitive nose easily picks up the stench of magic, it's the lingering mana burrowed into his skin that tugs him in a direction, even the foreign parts of him wanting you. He finds you alone in the training room, the ground around you scorched beyond hell.
"We need ta' talk lad." Price rumbles as he closes the door behind him, the deep thrum of his voice hiding the anxious pressure he feels in his chest.
Your head whips to look at him. Price cherishes the way your eyes soften when you see him like a glittering gem. Then a sea of ice settles over your eyes, and you turn your head back to the target dummy as if looking at Price makes you sick. "Nothing to talk about captain."
"That so?" Price asks like he doesn't believe you, because he doesn't. Ancient instincts tug on his mind and he follows them. You know he knows what's plaguing your mind, both of you are aware of the elephant in the room and Price can see the way your shoulders progressively tense as he draws near. But you're a stubborn fool, you refuse to show how his presence makes your heart beat faster despite how each of his steps rings like a gunshot in your ears.
Your mind fails to conjure up words but you force an "Hmh," out of your throat, trying to ignore how Price is so close to you, the heat of his body radiating into yours. His remaining wing stretches out, scales and leathery membranes barely brushing over your shoulder, but the intent is clear; the claim is clear.
You try to ignore him, ignore yourself, clinging to the sensation of your sharp mana digging into your veins as you summon another bout of magic to shoot at the training dummy, whisps of formless energy quickly forming into your preferred element.
His hand settles on your hip, not enough to make you loose focus just yet. "Because last ah remember," He leans in closer, the smell of black coffee and cigars on his breath. This close he can smell you instead of your magic, his chest rumbling against your back with a happy purr. "you promised me dinner if I lived."
You nearly choke on air, your magic sputtering out like an old car engine. "I-" You whirl around, your noses almost touching from how close you are. "-that's not what I'd meant!"
His heart should break at that, but before it can his sensitive ears pick up how rapidly your heart's pounding in your chest, reptilian eyes noting how you're flushed more than usual, breathing rapidly without even noticing it.
"Really now?" That greedy part in his bones urges him on, begging and pleading for him to just take you. His other hand settles on your shoulder, keeping you in place, close to him just like he wants. "Then ah suppose all that 'bout me bein' a slimy bastard was also not true?"
You want to flinch away but can't, your own body a traitor to you, a deep frown tugging on your lips. "Price, I wasn't-"
"And-" He cuts you off by leaning even closer, his forehead resting against yours and fuck, your head fits perfectly between his horns, like you belong there. "-I must've misheard you when you said you loved me?" He raises an eyebrow, voice both teasing and serious, holding his breath.
Just that small contact of skin on skin has your resolve crumbling like sand, "Listen, just-" You suck in a sharp breath, the situation both bliss and hell for you. “My feelings aren’t real and my heart’s a fucking idiot. Okay? And just-" You try to stammer the same lies you'd tell yourself every time you'd catch yourself thinking of him more than just your captain (which was way too often).
Price's clawed hand grips your chin and manually closes your mouth, his smooth scales cool against your warm body. You forget to breathe, your eyes flickering all over his face as he smirks, voice deep and guttural like the rumble of moving tectonic plates. "Then I'm an idiot too."
The world goes completely silent as he kisses you, holding your head still so he can claim your lips for himself, his deep purr shaking both of your chests when you submit so easily to him, like getting a gulp of fresh air after years of drowning.
You're so lost in his taste and his scent and just him you don't notice when Price roughly pulls you into the showers, tail and wing and arms holding your body; as if your brain could even conjure the thought of leaving. Bursts of awareness assault your mind every time you part for a breath and to displace a piece of clothing, his sharp claws tickling your skin as he can't wait and just cuts through your remaining clothes.
Clawed fingers grip your hair and tilt your head back, exposing your throat to sharp fangs and you submit easily, trusting him not to hurt you too much. Low sounds rumble in your throat as Price marks you, biting one spot until it bleeds your mana rich blood, greedily drinking up the crimson droplets and soothing the wound with his tongue just enough for the sting to become pleasant before biting again. Bite, lick, bite, lick, bite, lick— chest rumbling with satisfaction he pulls away, "Oh, look at you," He growls, your throat turned into a warzone, "So handsome, like a charming knight."
You snort and grip his hips, the water of the shower raining down the two of you. "Yeah?" You ask as you turn him around, pushing his chest against the wall as you drop to your knees. "Gonna let me lay you?" You ask, kissing down his spine, your rough hands groping and fondling his ass.
"Wanker," Price growls and lifts his tail, revealing his hole to you. You almost cum on the spot from the sight of it, looking every bit what you'd imagined he'd look like. But you don't get to look for long before his tail wraps around your throat, soft underbelly scales scraping against your bruised throat as he pulls you closer. "Only, if you prove your worth."
You don't need a formal invitation, pushing your tongue out as you slobber all over his hole, your hands keeping his asscheeks spread so you can worm your tongue into his hole, feeling him clench around your tongue, his moans ringing like angel song in your ears. His claws tangle in your hair, pushing your head even closer to worship him better. And you do, like a pious believer you lick and suck and nibble around his hole, your nose buried in the space between his ass and tail, barely able to breathe but it's a small price to pay.
Finally he grows greedy for more, his tail releases a fraction and he shoves you, making you fall back on your ass, your cock standing like a flagpole. You only manage to rise up on your elbows before Price jumps on you like the beast he is, thigh powerful thighs bracketing your own, his clawed fingers scraping against your skin as they settle on your shoudlers.
"Now then," Price rumbles like an ancient mountain, reptilian eyes hooded with lust. He feels on top of the world with the way you look at him, like a desperate mutt, your cock hard like a rock between his legs. "Stay still, mighty knight, an-" Price lifts himself up, positioning your cockhead at his puckered rim. "-relax."
The running water muffles your combined groans, his walls hot and tight like the fire in his chest. His weight bears down on you, wing stretching out in a show of pleasure, his tongue hanging out of his mouth as he pants. "Fuck," Price growls, grinding his hips down into yours. "Feel so good, lad."
You grunt, your hands fitting on his hips like they always belonged there. Magic sparks across your arms as pleasure steadily erases your ability to think, but his thick scales keep him safe, a pleased groan leaving his chest as he starts bouncing on you, chasing his own pleasure. You can do nothing but hang on, your hips rising to meet his downward thrust, Price's lips swallowing your moans. You don't have enough sense in your head left to care if anyone was to come in and see you, your mind fully consumed by him.
You cum way too soon, your orgasm sneaking up to you, lightning rushing down your spine and magic sparking across your arms as your brain leaks out of your ears, shooting cum up into his greedy walls.
"Good- good lad." Price grinds his teeth, never stopping his bouncing, lewd sounds ringing through the showers from the way your cum squelches inside him. He rides you past the sting of overstimulation right back to hardness. His hand grabs yours, placing it over the scars on his abdomen where your magic had stitched him back together, greed and lust fueling his desires. "Protected me so good, yeah?" His hips never cease moving, that draconic endurance coming in handy to absolutely wrecking you. "Let me take care of you,"
And like a proper mate, you let him do as he pleases.
#Gnome's Prompt Game#cod mw2#x reader#gnome correspondence#trinkets from the hoard#male reader#captain john price#top male reader#john price x male reader#john price x reader#cod x male reader#cod smut#cod modern warfare#monster cod au#monster 141 au#mage reader
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This may make some of my newer followers disgusted by me but I feel like this perspective should be addressed. I have had problems with hypersexuality since genuinely as long as I can remember. Like, I'm talking about six and seven years old. Before I even understood what was wrong with me. I'm not going to get into details because the truth is that the details that I have are blurry at best and any attempt I have ever made to uncover more has only led to panic attacks and alcohol relapses. At around 13 I discovered porn online. Not like I didn't know it existed, but, I had never interacted with that kind of content previously. I had a serious porn problem until I discovered radical feminism, honestly. It opened my eyes to what should have been in front of me. Things I knew deep down but wanted to forget because it's okay if I'm imagining it happening to horrible me, right?
And, I'm not talking about the most baseline forgivable. I mean hard kinks. I mean that I was self-destructive to the point that I begged my boyfriend to go farther than he seemed to want to at times. And I honestly wanted to die and for him to be the one to kill me. When I was being choked I feel like I was going to reach the gates of Heaven. That peace was nearing because death is the ultimate freedom. I was so masochistic. I was such an alcoholic, dealing with anorexia....what I have never been clinically diagnosed with but I could only describe as violent OCD. I thought I could control what terrified me by playing pretend. Needless to say it did not work and it did not help in any capacity. But, if you asked me back then I would have told you it did. And I would have mostly believed that.
I channeled all of these problems into sex. It was all I could think of. I masturbated CONSTANTLY. It's like I was on fire all the time. The online communities I lingered on and even some female friends irl to this day told me that it was completely fine and healthy to cope with these problems, especially the childhood....whatever with things like CNC. That it was just my old man that didn't do it correctly. I think about a lot of this almost daily and guilt isn't a good enough word to describe it. If there is a word beyond that or shame I don't know it, but, I feel it. At this point in my life my sexuality.....is almost a dead weight. A big part of me thinks I will never be cured, that my need for pain and my need for sex will trickle back the same and I'll explode.
I say all of this not for pity points, but because I think that fucked up women deserve to have a place here and for things like this to be discussed more openly. People can't be born pure and many people learn by terrible mistakes. Or maybe I'm the odd man out. Either way.
#ive made a few posts abt this and delted bc 1 no one interacted lmfaoo and#2 it was just way too personal#radblr#radical feminist safe#radical feminists do interact
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Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 5
Propaganda
Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):
#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show
Young hot rocker dilf
Loyal to his dead wife <3
Does in fact smoke weed
BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)
His band was a Christmas cover band btw.
Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy
Anti government (ofc)
Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)
Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??
Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch
One incredibly buff arm
Has a pet rat named after his son <3
Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged
OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE
HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON
A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)
HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS
IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED
Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence
Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!
I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.
Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so
HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.
Glenn is the goofiest sexiest character there is and I will die on this hill! I will ride into battle for him! what Dndads created is truly unique and Glenn is a key part of that and for that he deserves to win. I said it before and I'll say it again - GLENN SWEEEEEP
Can we talk about how he says ‘baby’ casually? Like he just calls people that?? That’s HOT. THAT IS HOT!! He’s also bilingual and knows Japanese!!!! He’s a big dumb idiot with a lot of charisma!!!!!! HE WORKED AT A BDSM PLACE FOR TWO SEPARATE ONE SHOTS. HES SO SAD BUT PLAYS IT OFF LIKE HE’S CHILL ALL THE TIME!! HE DOESN’T THINK OF HIMSELF AS SINGLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T DIVORCE HIS DEAD WIFE!!! He’s like.. the perfect guy. We need this win.
I’d also like to add the fact I made this. Which is the first 11 episodes edited to (almost) only have Glenn in them <3 which is a level of insanity I hope to reiterate. These took hours to make. I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.
Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.
Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.
Amber Gris (The Adventure Zone: Ethersea):
Middle aged woman who punches sharks to death. My hero
If you love me you'll vote for amber gris I swear to everything holy on earth amen
Amber is butch, instant win
Amber Gris has a negative charisma modifier and she pissed her pants on purpose in order to trick a guard and knock him out. She tied up a dude. She once killed an evil magic shark (they're out for murder. not like real sharks) by punching it and then picked it up and smashed it into another shark, also killing it. She talks in a southern accent. She calls people guppy because it indicates a lack of respect. She has a big pair of magical green arms that come from her stomach. She got a fancy jacket and immediately ripped its sleeves off. She has a gay thing going on with one of the political leaders in the city. She gets in fights with people and doesnt do vulnerability and tries to lay low and not get in any social trouble she doesn't have to. She jumped through a portal into a new world because she could. She's now the god of said world, alone with only afformentioned political leader, who was previously possessed and she had to fight. She spends her time in a bar called the Cloaca. She calls people she doesn't like claspers, because it means shark penis. She and her friend, an old man named Uncle Joshy, sneak attack each other and yell VIBE CHECK! She tries to talk fancy to impress people and she's really bad at it (verily).
She’s everything and more. She’s irreverent. She punches sharks for a living. She becomes God. What more do you need in a butch.
amber gris propaganda: she is straightup the physical embodiment of "women want me, fish fear me." also she's an appalachian post apocalyptic sea captain. that's just objectively cool.
AMBER GRIS IS PUNCHES SHARKS AND IS (one of) THE MOST BADASS BLACK WOMEN PCS IN DND SHOWS IVE EVER SEEN. SHES INCREDIBLE AND A WIN FOR DYKES EVERYWHERE
amber's creator said she was based off of the type of working-class woman you commonly see in appalachia where "this is the sort of woman that you see walking past CVS, and you know that a truck could hit her and it would just split around her as she continued to go pick up whatever she had to do that day." and that's pretty hot
guys Amber becomes lesbian god of the new world with her childhood “”friend””
#amber gris is LITERALLY a middle-aged butch #she would win this entire tournament in a just world
Last time Amber got horny was when she killed that shark
"it was a savage bummer though, don't-- trust me, there's nothing that great about a history. You know? I got one. What did I do, killed a bunch of sharks? Last time I got horny, god and christ I can't even tell you-- well, it was when I killed that shark. But! Hey. We're all just kinda figuring it out."
Moonshine Cybin (Not Another D&D Podcast: Bahumia):
She's a hot elf with mushrooms growing on her. She has 1 level of barbarian. She's bisexual. She shapeshifted into a dragon and ate a god.
how tf does the post not mention Moonshine’s giant boobs her greatest asset
Moonshine has canonically gone down on a woman for a solid hour without asking for anything in return. Moonshine edged a dryad just by kissing them. Moonshine faced down someone being controlled to kill everyone in his path and told him if he still wanted to hurt her, she would take his blows as a friend. Moonshine makes jambalaya for her family and friends. Moonshine mispronounced someone’s name for a month and that woman still wanted to hook up with Moonshine. These are just a few of the reasons why Moonshine is sexy.
shes illiterate
canonically huffs dirty water from a bong
has big tatas
wears a belly chain with a demon trapped in it
almost became the queen of hell
ate a god
turned into a pregnant moose & gave birth
The woman she went down on for an hour asking nothing in return is still hung up on her, 200 years later. Moonshine is unmatched
To be clear the woman whose name Moonshine mispronounced for a month and then hooked up with is the same woman she went down on for an hour, and the same woman who is still flustered over her 200 years later. The rizz is unparalleled. She’s also incredibly kind and accepting of others, and goes out of her way to bolster her friends. The party always requests one big bed.
moonshine cybin is a druid who learned counterspell through sheer force of will. moonshine cybin turned one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse into a dolphin, flew him 60 feet up into the air, dropped him on the ground, and then spit spores into his face to kill him. moonshine cybin turned into a dragon and bit the head off of a double god. moonshine cybin was willing to confine herself to an eternal hell to save the world. moonshine cybin is a dragon rider. you know what you must do.
Amber and Moonshine Together
Look at them. They should not have to fight when they could be gay instead. Imagine the power they would have combined... Every lesbian in a hundred mile radius of the post would swoon. It may be an odd alliance, but from an Ethersea fan to Bahumia fans, i believe this will strengthen both our odds. I have always been insane about Amber Gris but through this poll I have also learned about Moonshine and come to love her too. Take my hand... We can do this together...
OKAY HEAR ME OUT MOONSHINE AND AMBER WOULD GET ALONG SO WELL
appalachian sapphic solidarity!
Art of Amber and Moonshine from @pirateknight.
#Round 5#Glenn Close#Glenn Close DnDads#Moonshine Cybin#Amber Gris#Not Another D&D Podcast#Bahumia#The Adventure Zone#TAZ Ethersea#Dungeons & Daddies#Dungeons and Daddies
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Time to be delulu yet completely serious on my bnha 423 opinions.
Good points: The resolution between AFO and Yoichi was satisfactory, love as a reason for evil and evil deeds, the rooftop trio having one final moment full of emotion, the moment of Kurogiri thinking about Tomura and the LOV, Deku having a quirk of his own born out of determination and hard work, Deku as the protagonist of bnha in general, Tomura's last actions and words.
Bad points: Rushed arc conclusions, moments that felt kinda repetitive or lacked the punch given that we've seen/lived them before, not the best compositions we've seen from Horikoshi on the panels, Tomura's arc being rushed to a martyr ending— for impact???? ( or it ending on another cliffhanger that is gonna turn to be different from what we expected ).
I'll go in depth, so please check under the cut.
GOOD POINTS:
Yoichi and AFO:
The last conversation among these brothers was everything I was expecting. The love was there and it transformed them. It made AFO a monster and Yoichi a ghost.
For me, this time the AFO ending needed to be quick because we've already said goodbye to him too many times. This was supposed to be about AFO's refusal to give up on his brother and the unresolved relationship of those two.
I really liked how Yoichi reminded AFO that he needs to face the consequences of his actions and that he's love won't be able to save them.
Villain love:
Love as a reason for pain and destruction is perhaps one of my favorite tropes. So many stories approach love as this purely morally good feeling, when in the end it is just like any other feeling, you know?
People go to war for love all the time. They kill for love. Die for love. Do unforgivable things for love. Human existence is sooooo complex, why would love be the exception?
Horikoshi has been REALLY careful with the AFO backstory and his motivations. He didn't want an antagonist that felt empty. He made AFO human without redeeming him, okay? Because our ability to sympathize with some of AFO's traits doesn't make him less evil. To put it simply, it means that evil things are also human at heart.
Even those acts that you can't forgive or forget are motivated by something.
Kurogiri and the rooftop trio:
We knew from the beginning they were not the main characters of this manga.
We've gotten their story through glimpses and moments. Their time together had always been somehow rushed. Too many things to say, not enough time and they are on opposite sides of the war after all.
We knew that Kurogiri would go back because we knew he would protect Tomura during the final fight. We knew that he'd help the heroes defeat AFO. We knew he'd have to make his choice and say his goodbyes to his old friends.
Kurogiri, Tomura and the LOV
"He's friends are waiting" along with the image of Spinner asking Kurogiri to bring Tomura back to them was the highlight of this chapter for me. (You all expected it, right?)
Something about the way it reads like a father who wants his son to live because he is being waited for. He has friends who love him and would do anything to protect him, see him safe and sound. Something about the symbolism of Spinner putting Father (aka Kotaro's hand) on Kurogiri's face as he asked for it.
This chapter acknowledged that Kurogiri and Shirakumo share the same character core. They are always the protectors, the ones who would sacrifice themselves to see their charge survive. Similar to how Mic was waiting for Shouta so Shirakumo made sure that Shouta would survive, Kurogiri wants to do the same for Spinner and Tomura.
This alone would require an entire post to elaborate.
Deku's quirk:
The debate between endgame quirkless Deku or endgame OFA user Deku is settle.
I really liked that Deku got a quirk on his own that was born out of his own determination to be a hero. It's a nice representation of all he is as a character and what he stands for. Similarly, I enjoyed a lot the fact that it was short-lived. I'm the type who likes it better when things require a sacrifice or when miracles have their own conditions.
Deku doesn't feel overpowered to me. You get that sense that he really deserves everything he has and that it hasn't been a nonsense gift from the narrative. There's also the human condition, the limitations that keep him grounded.
Bnha and Deku:
Deku defeating AFO 'cause villains and heroes help him, his friends being there for him and being there to cheer for him as he fights, his sensei being there despite the fact that Aizawa at first thought Deku wouldn't make it— all the details that make bnha what it is.
They were good.
The UA kids really keep the story consistent when it is about them. They don't give up on anyone, they fight for each other, they stay to witness things for themselves. I love them <3
Tomura's last actions and words:
Careful here. Listen to what I'm saying.
If the narrative had pointed out to this ending, this would have been a good way to execute it.
Tomura coming back along with the vestiges to pack one final punch to defeat AFO— I know many fans that would be moved to tears and would be super excited to see it. Tomura was on point in this chapter, dialoguing with Deku without the hatred in his heart, his face being clearer and almost tender.
He felt defeated, like he had accepted his death already. There's also the connection to Kurogiri and Nana (who defended him) and his words to Spinner, that are meant as a general message to depict how much Tomura values the LOV.
Even the fact that AFO kept him around 'cause a part of him loved / cared about Tomura feels fitting, but I'm not sure if I correctly read the leaks in that part...
Anyway, we got the old trope of the antagonist who used his last moments to help defeat the real villain. It serves as his redemption and the expectation is for the public to feel sorry bad for him.
BAD POINTS
Rushed conclusions:
In my opinion, this chapter was too fast paced and therefore was not as emotional as it should have been.
It doesn't give the feeling that it's fast because the battle is intense. It gives the feeling of too much information packed on one chapter, so nothing really shines on its own. It's way too informative, not enough action narration.
Like I said before, the fatal mistake of a story is to be boring. Art has to provoke you, it has to engage with you, question you, awake things in you. This chapter tho, many things happened at the same time and it grew a bit murky.
Repetitive moments
Again, personal opinion here.
I think certain bnha movies were a mistake. Not because they were bad or boring or whatever, but because Horikoshi wrote parts of bnha real ending into them to the point you'd say "we've already seen that" while reading bnha 423.
Deku and Bakugo teaming up to defeat AFO was so expected. Not as in "the narrative is making sense", but as in "we saw it on heroes rising".
I feel the same with the students all appearing to help Deku fight AFO. That's a typical shonen structure where the friends making space for the protagonist to reach the main villain. It was already happening, so why bring AFO back?? I think the story is over-explaining here, making everything way too obvious. We could have had AFO's resolution with Yoichi before and the students moment after. In truth, it feels like Horikoshi closed some character arcs before he should and left plot holes without explanation, so he needed to reopen to accommodate.
Panel composition:
I admire Horikoshi when it comes to panel composition. He has some amazing panels that make the story really flow, but bnha 423 isn't there.
There are too many elements clustered and empty spaces that don't feel with purpose (in manga, even the blanks must have a purpose). This chapter should have been at least two, so you wouldn't have to rush Bakugo appearing, Yoichi and AFO resolution, Kurogiri saying his goodbye to the rooftop trio and facing AFO for Tomura's sake, Deku remembering where he started and where he is, Tomura last words and the Tomura and Deku resolution...
Those are too many important plot points to illustrate in a hurry.
Also?? The panel of Tomura and Deku punching AFO is so unserious. Totally wrong place to be funny sjbdjdnd why does it even feel like the vestiges are punching air???
" Tomura's ending " :
I'm not the first to say it feels anticlimactic and as if it isn't the ending at all.
The major problem is that through the manga, Horikoshi has focused a lot on Tomura as a character, carefully developing him, giving him tropes that are often reserved for the hero or the main character, making sure we empathize with him, we understand him, hyping up Deku's journey to rescue him.
We got an entire arc from the LOV perspective. This is not the type of one sentence ending you give to an antagonist you spent so much ink and sweat on. The nonchalant way of Tomura accepting his death? The little reaction from Deku? What was the purpose of the manga building up the LOV friendship to the moment where Kurogiri told AFO that Tomura's friends were waiting for him, if you'd make him just disappear on thin air?
This reads absolutely like a bunny within a hat.
That's being optimistic.
If we want to be cynical, maybe this is all there is. I don't find it readable to end the story with Tomura dying. All that effort to save him and it ends in "oh well, he decayed along with AFO"?!
If you think about it, Toga status is unknown because we don't even know where she went or if she's still alive, Touya status is also unknown although we know he wanted to live and that the ice prevented him from further damage, we haven't seen Spinner, we don't know if Kurogiri vanished with that last attack on AFO and now we saw Tomura decaying into the wind.
Yo kill half the surviving LOV would be a bold move that wouldn't follow the narrative. The reward for the hero students should be being able to save their counterpart, so the world can regard them as the greatest heroes 'cause they save the unsalable and blah blah blah.
There's also the fact Tomura hasn't been saved yet. Tenko? Nana and Deku saved him from Kotaro. The crying kid? Saved from AFO by Deku and the vestiges and the others. Tomura? Nop, he's dying/dead. The one person Spinner really wanted to save was Tomura. He didn't know about the crying kid or Tenko. He wanted to save his friend, the "irredeemable" villain, the young man he played videogames with and fought alongside and vowed to follow.
If this is the end, it's incomplete.
So we might hope it is not the end.
#bnha#mha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#league of villains#lov#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#shigaraki tomura#tenko shimura#deku#midoriya izuku#afo#all for one#bnha 423#mha 423#bnha leaks#mha leaks#kurogiri#rooftop squad#spinner#shuichi iguchi#bnha manga spoilers#shan's bnha opinions#shan's mha opinions
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If you need any convincing that Noel and Liam Gallagher are incestuous freaks (affectionate), here's the basic information you need
First of all. The kisses
Loch Lomond kiss, where they just... made out on stage in front of cameras. Cool. There's a gif with every photo from every angle.
Another kiss, this time in Japan. Here's the actual video.
And here's the same video but together with nice quotes from their 2016 documentary:
Here's a 2005 award event where they kiss again and also look quite in love
And here's Liam straight up groping Noel during concerts:
General stage antics and more groping:
Just one more groping
Ok. Let's talk about the music, then
Oasis has a song that Noel wrote called "My Sister Lover". The title speaks for itself, really. It includes amazing lyrics such as "You're my lover, I'm your brother"
But there's more! Noel used the same chorus of this song (with different lyrics) for a song he released in his solo album, 20 years later. It's called "Lock All the Doors". The very first line says: "She wore a star-shaped tambourine, prettiest girl I’d ever seen". And guess... guess who famously played a star-shaped tambourine? Liam! And Noel was the one that gifted him the fucking tambourine!!
Liam wrote a song for Oasis called Guess God Thinks I'm Abel
I'll just link everything that's been said about this song, because it really is batshit insane that this song exists
(It's common in the north of England to refer to things and people as "our". When either Liam or Noel say "our kid", they're talking about each other)
Liam has the tendency of thinking every song Noel writes is about him, including the love songs
Here he says "I'm his muse", along with some other interesting quotes
Ok, now we're on to suspicious quotes!
They had sex last night, according to Liam
This one is my favorite:
Of course this one is just all the weird quotes jammed in one post, you can feel yourself going crazy as you read it
Noel assures us that Liam knows about his arse
Other people confirming that they act like a couple. And them being fucking weird about each other’s marriages.
This one has Noel saying Liam is deeply in love with him. At the bottom, Liam's tweet.
Actually Liam always tweets things that basically confirm they're relationship. Like when somebody asked him if he ever rimmed Noel. Yeah.
This radio interview is where the most lovely quotes come from. Only Noel was supposed to be interviewed but then they both showed up PISSED DRUNK. Transcription in the same post
Even More weird quotes
This one involves the word impregnate
Noel making a suspicious comment about his daughter and son, Anais and Donovan
I think to be convinced you really just need that, but I'd like to add some niceties.
Just genuinely enjoying each other’s company
This is from the Oasis; 10 Minutes Of Noise and Confusion documentary. As Noel is kissing Liam's cheek, Liam is saying "He’s a fucking cunt and I hate him and I love him and he twists my melon, man. He’s the best songwriter in the fucking world.”
Some sweet quotes, and some less sweet ones as well
From the Supersonic documentary
Hugging after playing football
Just being silly
To finish off, two wonderful video edits with endearing moments
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BAGGAGE | JJK (08)
Summary: Drowning in debt and blood, Jeon Jungkook knows he's better off alone, lest he brings people down with him.
But one drunken night changes everything.
In a blink of an eye, Jungkook found himself drowning not only in debt and blood, but also in dirty diapers and judgmental stares from you, a.k.a his long-lost love and the guardian of the son he didn't even know existed.
Genre and warnings: best friends to lovers, co-parenting, idiots in love, mutual pining, angst, fluff, implied smut, kissing, minor character death, slight getting back together, cursing, blood, stabbing, loan sharks, OC cusses excessively so watch out, Jang Min and OC being intimate, non-graphic smut (barely a smut)
Pairing: dad! Jungkook x adoptive mom!Reader
Word Count: 3.1k
←Previous Chapter (07) | Next Chapter (09) →
****
Present, 2023:
When a nurse approached you, you were close to dozing off on the waiting bench. You didn't understand the nurse initially, your eyes drooping a little as the last forty-eight hours inevitably took a toll on your mind and body.
"You can visit Mr. Jeon now." The nurse said gently, yet it startled you.
"Oh." You abruptly stood up. Your legs wobbled and cramped after long hours of sitting. "Thank you."
"But you can also go home for a while." The nurse frowned at your strained voice. You looked exhausted. The nurse feared your lack of sleep would make you agitated.
The nurse didn't feel like breaking another fight of yours with Jungkook.
"No need." You shook your head and forced down the lump stuck in your throat. "I promise him I'll be here when he wakes up."
"If you wish." The nurse relented and simply led you straight to Jungkook's room. You had to pause for a while, though, steadying your breathing and cupping your trembling hand on the door knob.
It's going to be alright. You cheered yourself. You can stop yourself from beating the shit out of that reckless bastard.
Thankfully, your mini pep talk worked as you spotted Jungkook obediently sitting on the bed, lost in his thoughts, but he immediately snapped his head up the second he heard the door open.
You two briefly stopped in your tracks, eyes meeting and throats constricting.
You were the first to move. You averted your gaze and went beside Jungkook. On the table was the basket of fruits you brought before. You picked up an apple, flopped on the chair beside the hospital bed, and wordlessly peeled the apple.
The silence soaked through the room, leaving Jungkook feeling suffocated as if someone was gripping his throat and ants were crawling his skin.
You finished peeling and cutting the apple into bite size. You put it on a plate and settled it on Jungkook's lap.
Jungkook merely looked at the fruit, throat dry. He forced himself to speak, "I can't eat that."
"Why not?" You narrowed your eyes, feeling your temper heat up. Calm down, you reminded yourself.
Jungkook looked pitifully at the apple. He couldn't remember the last time he ate a fruit or a proper meal. It was always canned crab or a small meat bun.
"The doctor told me not to eat solid foods for a while. It will aggravate my stomach wound."
"Oh, so now you suddenly give a fuck about your health? Didn't you say you want to die, you suicidal freak?"
Jungkook flinched slightly at your sharp voice. You seemed to realize your aggressiveness, prompting you to school your expression to calmness. This is not how it's supposed to go. You thought. You promised yourself you’d talk to Jungkook like a real adult.
"I'm sorry." So you apologized. You rubbed your face in frustration. Your eyes hurt. "I didn't mean to lash out like that."
Even your apology felt rehearsed—like you didn't mean it. However, Jungkook didn't mind your anger. He thought it was warranted, so he sighed softly and said, "It's alright. You're just tired."
Jungkook's eyes zeroed in on you. You were still wearing your clothes from before. "Did you not go home...?"
"No." You shook your head and licked your lower lip. "I promise I'd be here when you wake up, didn't I?"
Something inside Jungkook felt like it was unraveling—like his heartstrings were knotted and unbelievably tight to the point of discomfort. But now, he felt his heartstrings were falling into the right place.
Jungkook couldn't help but hum. He swore he wasn't emotional, but the hospital's white walls, his aching body, and you honoring your promise made him want to cry.
"I was being silly." Jungkook was ashamed. "I-I shouldn't have asked you to stay."
He was sure you had other commitments. You had Soobin to look after. Jungkook wasted your time, and now he was feeling guilty about it.
You probably thought the same way because you scoffed.
"I would have stayed, anyway. I looked for you even when you didn't want to be found, remember?" The implication behind your words was clear. If Jungkook hadn't forgotten to update his emergency contact, you might never have heard from him again. He didn't even want to take your calling card. Jungkook only did so to shut you up.
"I'm sorry."
It was a general apology. You scoffed again.
"I'm sorry for what? You've done a lot of fucked up things, you know."
"I know." Surprisingly, Jungkook did not refute it. The apple on his lap was discoloring; if you look at it, you will realize that the darkening fruit resembles Jungkook’s relationship with you. Leaving it untouched for a long time made its appearance look worse.
You and him had not talked in years. Your relationship was good as severed, so why? Why did a tiny part of Jungkook still hope he could remedy it if he came clean now?
"I lied." Jungkook started. But it was vague. You both knew he lied about many things.
Jungkook expounded, hoping to lessen the hatred in your eyes.
"I didn't do this..." He gestured at his body. "I never wanted to live, but I swear I wasn't trying to kill myself that time."
It worked. Your fiery eyes died down a little. Or maybe not. It was just not directed at Jungkook anymore.
"Who did this to you," you demanded.
Jungkook's heart was turbulent. He was used to seeing your current expression: protective and ready to snarl at anyone who dared mess with him.
Jungkook realized just how well you had treated him back then. It broke his heart knowing that he was the one who broke your trust—that he was why you wouldn't look at him like this anymore (save for special circumstances like this.)
"I don't know." Jungkook lied. Old habits didn't die simply because he wanted to. Jungkook couldn't be completely honest with you, not because he didn't trust you but because he was embarrassed by how his life became this fucked up.
So he lied. He lied because this was the only thing he was good at.
"It was a random guy. I don't think I was his target." Jungkook twisted the truth by saying that the guy who stabbed him mistook him for someone else.
"Son of a bitch!" You were indignant, thinking that Jungkook was a poor victim. You suddenly felt guilty for lashing out and insulting him.
You had always been like this. You’d run your sharp mouth, and only after things had calmed down would you try to salvage the mess you’d made.
"We should call the police! Why didn't you say so earlier? This is un—"
"No need.” He cut you off, feeling the weight of his guilt for lying to you. "I don't want to make this a bigger mess. You know those kind of people. He’d probably come back to mess with me if I snitch about him..."
It was half-lie and half-truth. Jungkook refused to make an enemy of Lee Sung. Besides, no matter how one looked at it, it was Jungkook's fault he was in this predicament. He was the one who owed money to someone he couldn't pay. No one forced him to loan for money. It was all on him.
"But..."
You wanted to protest, but Jungkook acted as if he were in pain. He dramatically cradled his stomach and whined, "I'm tired."
At least the thing he said wasn't a lie. Jungkook was indeed worn out. He thought he could talk to you; a silly part of him even believed that honesty would save him.
But nothing will. Jungkook was utterly useless. He realized now that he couldn't even tell you the truth about him being stabbed. It was humiliating.
You conceded, but for a different reason.
"Alright," you said. You could barely hold on, too. You picked up a blanket to cover Jungkook’s body, and as much as you wanted to say you did it absentmindedly, you knew it wasn't the case.
You meant for Jungkook to feel comfortable while he slept in the hospital bed. It was pathetic, really. Verlaine warned you about this before. You remembered the professor shaking his head when he said, "The problem with you is you're loyal." There was a pause as if he needed to study you from head to toe first.
"You're loyal to a fault."
The context back then was different from today, but the gist was the same: your forgiving heart was your downfall. Sometimes, you choose to set aside your pain whenever you see the people around you in pain.
"I'll be back later." You tried to ignore Verlaine’s opinion. You were headed to the door. "We still have a lot to talk about."
You barely talked. You had yet to tell things about Soobin. Surprisingly, Jungkook did not react violently. He nodded his head in concession.
"But you need to go home." Jungkook gripped the blanket, desperately hoping he could still feel the warmth of your hand there.
He couldn't.
"Let's talk soon. When we're not tired."
Your hand lingered on the door knob. You had a bad feeling. You didn't want to leave.
But...
"Okay." You yielded, too.
The door opened and clamped shut after that. Jungkook waited 10–-30 minutes to make sure you left before he forced himself to stand and leave everything behind.
****
Considering that you were sleep-deprived, you knew it was unsafe to drive. You had no choice but to call your boyfriend’s assistant to bring you home.
“Hello~~” The assistant, Lee Sung, greeted you like his usual enthusiastic self.
You merely raised your brow as you settled on the back seat. You closed your eyes and said, “How’s Soobin? Jang Min?”
You broke your promise to little Soobin. Your son probably missed you like crazy—This was the thing about Soobin; he had never been separated from you for more than a day as he suffered from separation anxiety. Luckily, Lee Sung brushed off your worry.
“Soobin-ah is sleeping. He never once called for you since he’s busy playing with the boss. Speaking of, should I drive you to the boss’ house? Soobin-ah is there.”
Lee Sung’s boss was naturally your boyfriend, Jang Min. You had been dating for a year now. You never really left Soobin to Jang Min, save for emergencies like this. Thankfully, Soobin seemed to like staying with Jang Min.
“Yes,” you answered Lee Sung, even though you knew the answer should be obvious already. “I’ll stay at Jang Min’s tonight.”
Lee Sung’s jaw tensed up, but he didn’t say anything. He just stepped on the gas harder. You didn’t mind; you were itching to shower and see Soobin, too.
The drive to Jang Min’s house was pretty short. You silently hopped out of the car. Your boyfriend was already waiting at the front door, cigarette in hand.
“Hi.” Jang Min extinguished the cigarette stick and threw it away. Normally, you snorted and refused to embrace your boyfriend, not when he smelled like smoke. However, you couldn’t care less now. Your whole body ached for comfort, and Jang Min’s warm chest was the perfect relief.
“Hello, Cолнышко мо.” Jang Min kissed the top of your head, and you melted. You liked this. You liked it when Jang Min called you “my little sun” in his native language. He was half Russian and half Korean. Jang Min said that endearment suited you best: “You brighten my day like the sun.” Jang Min used to say as he kissed you silly.
“Did Soobin give you trouble?” Unlikely, but you still asked.
“No.” Jang Min kissed you again. “He just slept a lot. He misses you.”
“Really,” you snorted. “Lee Sung-ssi said Soobin barely talked about me.”
“Not true. You know your son loves you a lot. As I do.”
Your eyes fluttered shut when Jang Min kissed you for the third time; his big hands roamed around your body.
“Wait.” you bit your boyfriend’s lips to get him to stop. Jang Min just moaned and continued kissing you.
You sighed between kisses. You were forced to push your boyfriend’s chest. “Stop. I’ve got to see Soobin first.” You felt guilty and offered another peck to Jang Min’s lips. “And shower. I need to shower so badly.”
Jang Min looked a little disappointed, but his eyes were indulgent. He let go of you but not before squeezing your ass, “I missed you. Let’s see Soobin first, then I’ll help you bathe.”
Like Lee Sung said, Soobin was sleeping, so you didn’t dare disturb him. You watched your son sleep for a few minutes before taking up Jang Min’s offer to help you clean yourself up. Thankfully, Jang Min already ran you a bath while you were in Soobin’s room. You stripped off your clothes and got into the tub at once.
“Relax,” Jang Min whispered as he kissed your exposed shoulder blades. You shuddered but calmed down when Jang Min started lathering shampoo into your hair and massaging it.
Good. This feels so good.
Jang Min did everything for you—he washed your hair and massaged your sore body.
“Are you doing good?” Jang Min was filthy rich. His tub could fit four people at once. He couldn’t help but join your bath; his wet body engulfed you into a tight embrace.
“Hmm,” you answered simply. You rested your head on Jang Min’s chest, stiff when you felt your boyfriend’s cock on the soft plush of your ass. You liked Jang Min; you really did. But you weren’t in the mood for anything physical tonight.
Jang Min felt it, too. He stopped kissing your trembling skin.
“Are you okay?”
It was a simple question that had a complicated answer, but you hadn’t developed a habit of lying. Your worn-out state also made you more vulnerable; you had no filter when you responded to your boyfriend.
“No.” You splashed water on your face to feel more alive. “I’m worried about him.”
“Jungkook?” Jang Min asked mildly but repeatedly trailed possessive kisses on your shoulders.
“Yeah. Did you know he’s been stabbed?”
“Stabbed.” The word rolled off Jang Min’s tongue. You couldn’t see his expression as Jang Min settled behind you, but you still elaborated on Jungkook's story.
“Jungkook…Jeon Jungkook, is it?”
“Yes.” You clicked your tongue, feeling like your boyfriend was focusing on the wrong thing. You had said many things, but Jang Min could only repeat your ex-best friend’s name.
“I see.” Jang Min’s fingers trailed your upper body, cupping your boobs. “You said he was your best friend and Soobin’s father. Do you wish to reconcile with him, or do you merely want to inform him that you take care of his biological son?”
This was an uncharted territory for you two. You only mentioned to Jang Min that you were meeting with Jungkook, but you hadn’t told him anything more. Frankly, you didn’t even know what you wanted Jungkook to do, and maybe that was why you started off on the wrong foot. You barged into Jungkook’s life after years of no contact. Lee Sung actually helped you locate Jungkook, and you disregarded your rationality and just went straight to Incheon to see Jungkook.
“I don’t know what to do. I just know I am worried about him.” Because even though Jungkook didn’t intend to kill himself, someone else might do so. Jungkook said it himself—he didn’t have any will to live. What if, one day, he just decided to stop thriving?
“Hmm,” Jang Min’s eyes were dark. “Your departed sister wished for Jeon Jungkook-ssi to meet up with Soobin, right? Why don’t you talk to Jungkook-ssi again tomorrow? See what he thinks about co-parenting.”
You almost choked on your spit upon hearing that. While that was the most obvious thing to do, you had to admit that you had never thought about it. You had never thought about sharing Soobin with anyone else—especially not with someone like Jungkook.
You felt silly now. You were overtaken by your emotions and only focused on telling Jungkook he had a son. Looking back, you realize you did such a thing to spite Jungkook. You couldn’t lie; it was satisfying to see him lose his mind, knowing that his betrayal had consequences that could be felt until now.
A baggage.
Your heart trembled, realization dawning on you. You wanted to use Soobin to hurt Jungkook, but your fragile heart couldn’t take it if Jungkook really saw your little Soobin as baggage.
“I’m scared, Min-ah,” you admitted. You tried to focus on feeling Jang Min’s hands touching every part of your body. It didn’t work. Your heart was inconsolable.
“Don’t be.” Jang Min bit your earlobe. “I am here if he doesn’t want Soobin.”
You balled your hands into fists. Right. Soobin had you and your boyfriend. But Jang Min laid some options for the disoriented you. Jang Min was so considerate that he opened up about letting Jungkook stay with you and Soobin if the situation called for it.
You were surprised. You tilted your head to see Jang Min’s expression. No trace of humor could be seen on his face, though.
“Are you serious?” Your mouth parted wide
Jang Min shrugged off, “Why not? He’s Soobin’s father.”
“Ah, yes?” You arched a brow. “But cohabiting with him? Did you miss the part when I told you I was in love with him?”
“Are you in love with him now?” Jang Min shot back, his hand spreading your folds.
You moaned. You were tired, but you couldn’t help but roll your hips against Jang Min’s thighs.
“N-No,” you answered at once. You were turned on. Jang Min trusting you was hot.
“Then I don’t see a problem with it.” Jang Min's hand moved with a slow but confident caress, sending a wave of ecstasy to your body. “You are still mine.”
You completely let your guard down; all thoughts of Jungkook were set aside as you drowned with the pleasure Jang Min willingly made you feel.
It was a long, passionate night for you, but come morning, you were again plagued by the thought of your ex-best friend. Jang Min couldn’t bear seeing you distressed, so he let you go and promised you that he’d look after Soobin.
“Thank you.” You bid your boyfriend goodbye and then went straight to the hospital. To your surprise (and anger), you had come to learn that Jungkook, that fucking bastard, ran away again.
**** ←Previous Chapter (07) | Next Chapter (09) → Hi! This is an ongoing fic and I just write this for fun. I know I am the author, but I still have no idea how this story will progress. There MIGHT be more upsetting tags in the next chapters, so if you are not up for surprises and major tags, please, please--drop this fic now. And as usual, if you have tags suggestions, please don't hesitate to reach out to me.
You can point out obvious errors in the chapter too because this is not beta-read.
What do we think about this chapter? I rushed writing this today! I still have work and a meeting in an hour, so I'll see you guys soon! Thank you!
#jungkook fluff#jungkook angst#jungkook x reader#ficswithluv#jungkook x you#jungkook x y/n#jungkook x oc#bts fic#bts angst#bangtan
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