#i miss my original thing :( i'm ready to return to being insane about it

[superfluouskeys]

wip actually wednesday! ♥

I was certainly not tagged by non-tumblr-user @menzosarres in my personal favorite form of social media, being snapchatted a tumblr post, but anyway, I have chosen to bother you all with more original thing because it's been awhile and also I want to and it makes me happy :) I'm also sharing two snippets bc see above :) and also the sections are related but my transitional sections in this part are a bit of a mess rn LOL.

I really need a better sorting system this is starting to become egregious.

part 1 || part 2 || part 3 || part 4

I'm doing a cop-out and saying if you want to do the thing pls feel free to consider yourself tagged!

==

���Back already, Sister?”

Tamsin startles.  Althea turns with poise and grace.  The owner of the voice is not nearly so imposing in her stature as Althea, but no less regal in her countenance.  Her flaxen hair is arranged delicately around her shoulders, accentuating the delicate shape of her face.  She wears a dress of deep red that appears to Tamsin a bit more fashionable than what Althea prefers, fitted at the waist and flared out down to her ankles.

“Sister Maren,” Althea nods cordially.  “There was an unexpected development.”

Maren’s sharp eyes fall upon Tamsin.  “So I see.”

“May I introduce Tamsin of Godsplace?” says Althea.

Tamsin glances nervously between them.  “Uh.  Pleased to meet you.”

She attempts a surpassingly awkward curtsey.  Maren’s thin-lipped smile exudes haughty derision.

“Yes,” says Maren.  “A pleasure, I’m sure.”

“So, as you can see, I’ll need to take her to get settled in and find someone who’s available to initiate her.”

Maren hums, a short, affected sound.  “I can teach her,” she says, with a sharp-eyed glance toward Tamsin, “if you want it done properly.”

Althea laughs.  “I think I’d prefer that our newest student survive her first week.”

Maren’s brow twitches in subtle annoyance at the jab.  “Suit yourself,” she says primly.  “But don’t come crying to me when Sister Helie teaches her whatever it is she’s calling proper form these days.”

“Did you need something, Maren?” Althea asks her evenly.

Maren scoffs.  “And here I thought I was coming to greet an old friend,” she replies mildly.  “Yes, as it happens, but I didn’t know you’d have company.  Come and find me, when you can spare the time.”

She turns to leave without waiting for an answer, her red skirts twirling dramatically around her.  Before she gets very far, though, she stops abruptly and turns back toward Tamsin.  “Oh, and,” she begins, and then curtseys low, curling her hand into a fist somewhere near her heart.  “Well come and well met, little sister.”

Tamsin watches her go in stunned silence.

“Well,” says Althea, with muted amusement.  “What a welcome.  Let’s get you settled, shall we?”

She sets off with surety, and Tamsin is left to scramble after her.

“Is she really a teacher?” Tamsin wonders, for lack of a better way to begin.  Tamsin does not have much experience with teachers, but the small handful of schoolteachers in Godsplace are all kind, if somewhat harried women, all but one among them (who but recently began as a sort of apprentice) much older and married with children.

Tamsin supposes Maren could be much older than she appears, but she certainly doesn’t have the air of patience Tamsin would expect from a teacher.  Tamsin wonders if teachers are very different here at the Academy.

“You doubt her suitability?” Althea wonders, still with that lilt of amusement about her voice.

“Oh, no, I only—“

“It’s understandable, but I assure you Sister Maren is an excellent teacher, and has an excellent heart besides.  Her style, however, is…not for the faint of heart, shall we say.”

“That was sort of what I was wondering about,” says Tamsin.

“Oh, you’ll see soon enough,” says Althea. 

==

Whatever Tamsin is expecting, Teacher Helie is not it.  She is noticeably slight of frame, particularly set against Althea, not quite plump but with an air of softness about her, and the silvery blonde of her hair and eyelashes gives her the look of one lightly dusted with the morning dew.  She greets Tamsin in the same way Maren did, except that it is not the same at all.  The curtsey, the gesture, and the words all bear the conviction of deepest sincerity.

“Tamsin cannot see the Gift thus far,” Althea tells Helie, “and it’s my impression she still doubts me when I tell her she possesses it at all.”

Tamsin ducks her head, embarrassed, although the words are true.

“Oh, dear,” says Helie gently, reaching out for Tamsin’s hands, “we Forgotten must never bow our heads in shame!”  Her voice matches her countenance, soft and sweet, and with the lilt of an accent Tamsin does not recognize.  When Tamsin takes her hands and looks up, she notices that Helie’s eyes are unusually pale, as though painted with the same brush as her hair and lashes.

Helie smiles kindly and squeezes Tamsin’s hands.  “Every Gift, big or small, is precious,” she says, with the same heart-wrenching conviction as well come and well met.  “And I believe that no Gift is an accident.”  She leans in, almost conspiratorial.  “The Gift wants to be used, you see.  Even the tiniest sliver of magic, in the right hands, may one day take the world by storm.”

“See?  Just as I’ve been saying,” says Althea, pleased, but restrained as ever.  “And with that, I shall leave you in Sister Helie’s capable hands.”  To Tamsin’s surprise, Althea then mimics the greeting the others have bestowed upon her.  Althea’s version is not sarcastic, but neither is it effusive.  Althea makes the gesture seem somehow ordinary, as though it were the way one should always expect to be greeted.  “Well come and well met, little sister,” she says with a regal curtsey.  “If there’s anything you need, your teachers can likely provide it, but nevertheless, please do not hesitate to seek me out.”

“Ah,” Helie sighs musically when Althea closes the door behind her.  “Forgive me for saying so, Tamsin, but you must really have left an impression on Sister Althea.”  She chuckles lightly.  “Normally she doesn’t like to be sought out by anyone.”

Tamsin picks at her skirt self-consciously.  “She could have just been saying that to be polite.”

Helie laughs.  It is a bright, joyful sound.  “Believe me when I tell you, Sister Althea doesn’t 'just say' anything.  And certainly not for the sake of politeness!”

Helie leads her to the front of the classroom, and pushes some of the frontmost desks out of the way.  “Now,” she begins.  “I’m sure Althea’s told you, but just to reiterate, it’s not at all unusual to be unable to see the Gift at first, particularly if you were raised in an environment where magic was not commonplace.”  She taps her temple.  “Our eyes can play tricks on us, you see.  We see what we expect to see, and our very minds are wont to ignore what doesn’t make sense to us.”

Tamsin considers this.  The statement somehow sparks both comfort and anxiety.  She wonders how much of her life she has somehow misremembered.  She wonders if perhaps there were signs that she had the Gift and she simply didn’t have the eyes to see them.  She wonders, with a sudden and intense twinge of remorse, if she could have escaped sooner, or if she’d have even thought to try.

“For those who cannot see, I find it’s best to start with feeling,” Helie continues.  “Now, don’t be discouraged if this doesn’t work right away, either.  Many of us are inclined to ignore what our bodies tell us, too.”

Tamsin lets out a breath of something like laughter.  “You make it sound a bit bleak.”

Helie considers this with a subtle furrowing of her delicate brow.  “Bleak?” she echoes.  “Oh, not at all, dear.  Perhaps you’re thinking of the time you’ve lost?  Wishing you’d realized earlier?”

Tamsin averts her gaze.  “You’ve read my mind, I’m afraid.”

Helie shakes her head.  “Whatever happened in the past, Tamsin, you’ve made it all the way here.  That is no small feat.  Where you are now is already so very different from where you started.  We Forgotten sacrifice much, but what we gain is…immeasurable.”

She holds out her hands, palms upturned, but it feels somehow different than before.  Tamsin watches her for a moment, hesitant, until Helie nods her encouragement.

Tamsin takes her hands.

She looks up, trying and failing to hide her disappointment.  She had expected something to happen.

“Close your eyes,” says Helie.

Tamsin closes her eyes.

“Take a deep breath.”

Tamsin breathes.  Her chest is tight, and she realizes only now that she is trembling.

“Another,” Helie directs.  “Breath by breath, let go of your fear.”

Tamsin breathes again.  But another voice echoes in the back of her mind, the man from the Town Square back in Godsplace.  Do you know fear?  How will you find peace?  Burn her, burn her, burn her—

Tamsin staggers back from Helie, heart racing, gasping for air, and with tears in her eyes.  “I’m sorry,” she stammers.  “I’m sorry, I really tried, I—“

“Oh, dear,” Helie soothes, with hands gently patting her arms.  “I see now.  Your power frightens you.”

Tamsin scrubs at her face, but the tears will not stop flowing.  It’s like the whole journey has come crashing back into her all at once, the horror of the screaming girl in the Square, the sorrow at the loss of a dear friend to an archaic tradition, the muted fury at the way her mother treats her, the terror at what would befall her at the whim of Teddy Page, and then--!

And then, perhaps worst of all, the hope!  The horrible, heart-rending hope that someone had come to save her at last, that everything would be different from now on--and the shame, that a nothing and a nobody should dare to want such change for herself, let alone allow herself to have it.

Tamsin covers her face, unable to stop her crying.  Helie continues patting her arms, and she speaks in a soft, soothing tone.  “It’s all right now, Tamsin,” says Helie.  “It always hurts the most before it starts to heal.  And can I tell you something else?”

Again Tamsin attempts to dry her eyes.  She sniffles miserably.  Helie withdraws, and digs a handkerchief out of her pocket, which she offers to Tamsin.

“Some people think foreswearing home and family and all that came before is the hardest part about becoming Forgotten.  And for them, that may be true.  But it’s not just about dedicating yourself to your craft, or to your sisters.”

Helie pats her shoulder again, more firmly this time.  “It’s about letting go,” she says with a smile, “of what is holding you back.”

The gravity of her words stuns Tamsin into a state of calm, and she is able to dry her eyes at last.

“Shall we try again?” Helie asks her.

Tamsin nods.

Helie moves away, back to the center of the space, giving Tamsin room to follow her.  Tamsin watches the way she holds herself, the way she presents her hands to Tamsin, like there is some sort of strength flowing through her arms, even though Helie doesn’t look remotely like the sort of person one would consider physically strong.

Tamsin tries to imitate Helie’s posture, squaring her shoulders and taking a deep breath before she approaches to take Helie’s hands.

“I can see what you’re thinking,” says Helie with a wry smile.  “You don’t want that to happen again.  But it might.”

Tamsin falters.  She withdraws her hands, and so does Helie.

“You have a lot of pain,” says Helie kindly.  “I’d guess it’s pain you barely even knew was there.  It won’t just go away like that.”

“Then…” says Tamsin uncertainly, “what should I do?”

“Let it all in,” says Helie.  Again, she presents her hands.  “The pain, yes.  But also the joy.”

Tamsin nods.  She takes Helie’s hands, and closes her eyes like before.

“Breathe in,” says Helie.  “Feel your fear, your sorrow, your anger.  Then breathe out, and let it go.”

Tamsin breathes in.  It’s like being outside in the dead of winter.  Her chest aches, and she is still trembling.  Dozens of burnings flash before her eyes, each one the same, each one an injustice.  Her cheeks burn with the shame of her namelessness, her ingratitude toward the woman who didn’t have to raise her, even in spite of everything Mrs. Burkow did and said.  Whatever Tamsin imagined in the recesses of her mind, she had always expected to lead an unremarkable existence.

But Tamsin is no longer unremarkable.  And it no longer matters that she has no family and no name.  Tamsin is here because Keeper Althea saw something in her that no one else ever could.  Tamsin is here because she has the Gift, because Althea believes she has the Gift, and so she must have the Gift, because, because—

Tamsin gasps, and she almost withdraws her hands, almost opens her eyes.  She feels…something, like a tingle beneath her hands, like some sort of invisible energy is radiating from Helie’s palms, real enough to touch.  She holds on tighter, as though she could get more of the feeling just by pressing down, but the tingle remains subtle, distant, like the fleeting remnants of a wonderful dream.

“Do you feel it?” Helie whispers, but there is a smile in her voice.  She already knows the answer.

“Yes,” Tamsin breathes.  Again there are tears in her eyes, but she isn’t embarrassed.  These are tears of joy.

[askmerriauthor]

Star Wars: Visions thoughts and discussion

Been on a bit of a Star Wars binge lately. Getting ready for the Book of Fett and the return of The Mandalorian soon, just finished playing the Jedi: Fallen Order game, and recently "Star Wars: Visions" dropped on Disney+ (not to be confused with the, like, half-dozen other Star Wars properties that use "Visions" as their title). If you've got the streaming service and haven't watched the series yet, I can honestly suggest you should do so. The whole thing is a series of very short episodes and is entirely non-canon to the setting, so you don't even need a hard understanding of Star Wars to enjoy it.

In fact, it's actually better if you don't know anything about Star Wars going in. Spoilers and brief episode discussion after the jump.

Episode 1: The Duel As soon as I saw a lightsaber umbrella and a R2 droid in a hat, I knew this one was going to be a must-watch.

I REPEAT. LIGHTSABER. UMBRELLA.

Solid kick-off for the short series. Dig the aesthetic, dig the classic samurai vibe (even if it's more of an homage than a direct application of the style), dig the simple story. The particular animation style they chose here was a little wonky but I quickly got used to the visuals and loved a bunch of the design choices too much to care. This one was very action/style-focused and clearly chosen as the leading episode for that reason, which I don't fault them at all for.

Episode 2: Tatooine Rhapsody I'm sorry, I don't recall giving Star Wars permission to be this fucking adorable, how dare you.

The tale of a Padawan survivor of Order 66 who makes a new life for himself not with the power of the Force, but with the power of Rock and Roll and Friendship. Bitchin'. Super adorable, semi-chibi art style that's honestly ringing, like, a dozen different bells in my head for trying to figure out all the different styles it's drawing from. Good fun, if a bit bland in the end. The biggest problem is the music. The story relies on "using music to save the day", which is fine. But when you use that trope you need an absolutely face-melting banger of a performance, which this just doesn't have. An enjoyable entry all the same though. Not bad, not great, cute designs; the quirky story of how Jabba the Hutt got a new slave band to play at his den.

Episode 3: The Twins This entire episode is animated by the team who brought us Kill la Kill and that should really tell you everything you need to know.

You know how if you get a bunch of little kids together, they'll start playing make-believe games where they just invent stories and plot twists and super powers like "I have whatever you can do, but infinity plus 1 better!" shit like that? That's what this short is. It has only the vaguest allusions to the setting proper and immediately hurls every semblance of consistency, logic, and sense out the window with both hands. It is 1,000,000% style over substance.

Okay, y'know what, no, that's not enough to describe the utter insanity this episode is. All I can find online is pictures of the main villain character pulling a General Grievous impression or the protag snaring lightsaber whips on his lightsaber, but that is fucking tiddlywinks compared to where this episode goes.

There is a scene in this short where the protag, who is ghost-riding the hood of his X-Wing upside down in space without a space suit, super-charges his lightsaber into a giant rainbow of FUCK YOU GEORGE LUCAS with the power of familial love and fabulousness, using said rainbow super saber to CUT AN ENTIRE STAR DESTROYER IN HALF WHILE ACCELERATING TO HYPERSPEED, all to save his twin sister's life by making her explode in a somehow non-harmful manner.

This short is utterly nonsensical drivel and yes I would like more right the fuck now, please and thank you.

Episode 4: The Village Bride Wait, we're actually trying to tell a reasonable story in this series? Sorry, I was still on a sugar high from the previous episode. Lemme sit down.

The Village Bride is great. Excellent short that's just dripping with atmosphere and a slow, purposeful pace to its writing. It's short and sweet with little focus on the Force-using characters themselves, which actually serves to its credit. Even in the Star Wars universe, the Ainu people can't catch a fucking break. Easily one of my favorites in the whole run.

Episode 5: The Ninth Jedi The fact that two characters in this short have Sasuke's haircut was extremely distracting. But I actually really enjoyed this entry overall.

Despite playing extremely loose with the established lore around how lightsabers work, this episode over all others really embraces the original setting and tells a slow-burn story about the potential revival of the Jedi Order. A little meandering at times, but it's a solid piece and well worth exploring. Of all the shorts in the series, this one has the greatest potential to actually continue on as a standalone series or be folded into the canon franchise. Main protag is an adorable bean and I love her.

Episode 6: T0-B1 This episode is simultaneously a love letter to Astro Boy and a giant middle finger to Star Wars lore purists.

The tale of an imaginative Droid named T0-B1 who dreams of becoming a hero like the Jedi he's heard so many stories of. This short gets extra credit for being so unyieldingly stylish and charming. On the surface of its presentation and story choices it seems like it doesn't know anything about Star Wars lore, but it's actually packed full of some pretty deep cuts that show the folk behind it do know what they're talking about and just don't fucking care what purists have to say. The entire thing is just "Yeah, I'm ignoring your lore, but I'm doing it in a fun way that makes the setting more interesting, and I'm so genuine about it that you can't be mad at me". I can respect that. Plus the old dude in that screenshot is an armless Jedi who's retired to be a botanist and that's just fucking cool.

Episode 7: The Elder I'm Episode 1, but better.

This one. This shit right here. This is the good shit.

I'm sure y'all have heard before that Star Wars is directly inspired by Kurosawa and samurai films in general, but The Elder really digs into that hard. Where Episode 1 styles itself after a samurai tale, Episode 7 is a samurai tale. Subdued, methodical storytelling, slow-burn pace, charming dialogue amid believable characters, and a truly intimidating villain who provokes a brief but striking duel. This is my vibe. I crave more of this. Far and away the best short of the entire series.

Episode 8: Lop and Ocho Oh for fuck's sake, there's going to be so much porn of this bunny girl character, isn't there?

This entry is another that kind of meanders with the story it's trying to tell and plays very loose with the lore. It reimagines a lot of what we know of the Jedi/The Rebels and Sith/The Empire into a feudal faction-based conflict akin to what you'd see in a period samurai drama. Modernization and callous industry crushing the spirit of the people and breaking apart families. A decent work overall, but nothing really all that impressive in the end. It takes too long to get going and then peters out halfway through its pay-off for some reason.

Episode 9: Akakiri The fact that I had to look up this episode's name and scenes online and still could not remember anything about it should tell you a lot.

The series ends on a downer with the dramatic tale of a fallen Jedi who sacrifices himself and succumbs to the Dark Side. Turning evil for... the greater good? Wha? Had some pretty neat visuals, but I genuinely cannot remember a damn thing about this episode or its characters. Big swing and a miss in terms of impact.

[itsakpopalypse]

Lost In a Dream

moodboard made by @memoiresofaneternaldreamer (thank you again for inspiring this fic with this beautiful moodboard and collabing with me, you're the ABSOLUTE best!!!)  Original post is here please go give love also!!

Cold sweat mats your hair to the back of your neck and around your hairline. Your breath comes heavy and hot, barely flowing out between quivering lips. 

 Kihyun.

His fingers so gentle, so soft, lips pulled back over pointed teeth gleaming in low light, flickering fire in the corner- playing orange and yellow on his skin. The air is full of him. The world is glitter and holographic rainbows and silken sheets and desire. It’s unheard of, the spark within you, far from mundane and far too perfect to explain.

You’re rolling at his gentle direction, granting him the entirety of your bared soul and silky skin from your shoulders to the widening of  your hips. His hands follow a path made for them, slowly trailing across  your burning body. “Petal, the sun will rise soon. The fog will wipe this from your mind.” His voice is resigned but sure. You know he’s right and the panic builds in your chest at the reality.  Flowers and moss surround the bed, the smell in the air is so fresh, it always is like this near him. Alive. Clean. Meaningful. The air nearly sparkles when he speaks. 

“Don’t leave me.” You whisper into the pillow, lips touching feather soft against the nape of your neck have you reeling, his fingers loop into your hair to pull it away, granting him further access to the expanse of skin beneath. His breath is warm and damp, you can feel the desperation in his touch. 

“You have me.”  He replies. True to his kind, you will  get no solid answer. “You have me and I have you. What is a little distance when your heart beats between my ribs?” 

You roll over, pulling him to hover above you so you can see the sincerity  you know is there. 

“I want you whole. Real. Not pieces stuck in my imagination. "

"I am real. This is real.  The only thing you are imagining is that-" his finger points to the door which is opening, streaks of morning light cutting through the darkness. "That is a distraction. " 

You can feel tears teasing your lashes. "I don't  want to. I don't  want to." 

You are a petulant child and you fight  the slow  slip into reality, you grasp the fullness of his cheeks,thumbs  brushing under his eyes.  

His eyes are warm and his smile is gentle,  and he holds your soul inside his as he murmurs soft promises and bids you farewell. "You must wake. But you're still mine. "

The soft rumble of his voice pulls you away. The edges of heaven slip  out of your grasp and the real world crashes down like cold water. Reality is hateful and dull, leaving you weighed down and burdened. Your skin itches with memory. You cannot see a face, you cannot  recall the substance of the dream  but you're on fire with longing. Someone is missing you as you miss them. Someone is out there. A sweetpea sits beside your bed,one that was not there when you fell asleep. Delicate, pleasure, bliss, departure after having a good time. 

It never made sense, but you had been receiving flowers with similar messages for as long as you could remember.

Soulmates weren't  anything new, but most people remembered the face from their dreams. All you remember  is fog and velvet kisses. Promises and a whisper.   It's not fair, honestly.  It's unheard of. Everyone sees their soulmate and when they meet them, it clicks. You're scared to tell anyone  you can't  see their face when you wake, so when asked you avoid it or act as though you're too shy.  The flowers also, were inexplicable. 

There's services to contact to look based on description  but you don't have one to give.  So you deflect and hope when you see them you'll just know.  

You begin getting yourself ready for work, knowing another boring day awaits, and wish you could return to the world that lives in your mind.  

------

“Y/N! There’s a customer downstairs, can you check in please?” Your boss calls from the hallway, poking his head in to catch your attention. You look up from the plants your misting gently. 

“Got it Sebastion.” You reply with a smile, setting down the spray bottle. “I’ll be right back.” You whisper to the plants, fingers gently tracing the edge of a leaf as you leave your favorite part of the job for a few minutes.

“Hello, welcome to Dream Blossoms, can I help you make a selection?” You ask as you approach the customer. He turns, and your momentarily struck. He has light pink hair, shaggy around his eyes which are warm and smiling. The corner of his lips tick up in greeting, and some warm tingle runs down your spine. You can’t explain it. It’s not the bolt of lightening you have heard is from soulmates, but the tingle is far too strong to go unnoticed. 

When he speaks, his voice is quiet but firm and it draws you nearer, your feet following a path you don’t yet know yourself. 

“Hello. I do think I could use your help.”  The base of your neck feels hot, like someone is breathing on it. It isn’t unpleasant, as it would normally be, instead it’s welcoming. 

��“I am looking for a flower that expresses sorrow. Maybe one for longing… “ He pauses pursing his lips thoughtfully in a way that is far too attractive and makes the apples of your cheeks color. “Something about incandescent happiness.”  His hands are in his pockets, but when he turns his body toward you, the draw pulls harder. 

“I can throw something together, is it, for a lover?”  You pass by him, and notice vaguely that the air near him smells less like a person and more like freshness. Clean and lively, and so so inviting. 

“It’s. For someone who is very special. They’ll understand it all together. Perhaps you can incorporate forget-me-nots?” His eyes wrinkle when he smiles, and for a moment, the very edges of his teeth seem sharper than they should, and his eyes, did they change color? 

The dreams must be getting to you, in your lack of sleep you are imagining insanity.

You eye him for a moment, desperate for a read on him. Deciding the bouquet is likely for his soulmate, you continue in your job, pushing the strange longing away.  “Okay, give me  a moment I think I can convey a feeling for you.” you incline your head to the chair in the corner flanked by orchids. “Have a seat please.”

You’d need white tulips, lily of the valley, blue bells,  cutting and arranging various flowers to fit his description. Something appeared off. Unbalanced, without a thought, you grab some white sweet pea and add it into the bouquet, pulling the entire message together .

Upon returning a short while later, you gesture to the man. “Here, I think this should be right.”

He hurries to your side, something sparkling in his eyes as he looks over your work. He looks more excited than you’d expect, his skin brushing against yours a few seconds longer than you would expect. It feels natural and you want to sigh when he pulls his hand back and clears his throat. “It’s lovely. Can you.. Tell me why you chose what you did?” 

“Of course. White tulips are best for a sincere apology, lilly of the valley indicating the return of happiness, and the blue bells for devotion, and you asked for the forget-me-nots so I assume you know they have several meanings. It’s sort of what inspired the others I picked. “

“Remembrance, connection even over time and distance, loyalty… Yes.” He nods, there's something sly in his smile, but you continue. 

“Yes.”

“And the sweet pea?” He steps a little closer, “ Why that?” He seems nearly out of breath when he asks, leaning close to you, invading the bubble you kept to yourself. You shouldn't  be okay with it, but you allow it, unable to bare backing away from the warmth that radiates from his being. He feels like life and happiness  and it sends a rush down your limbs that you can’t describe, and he hasn’t even touched you.

“It was more of a haunch. You’re apologizing but trying to show your affection. It didn’t seem like it was something too heinous, more like you had been lost to them but are coming back. Did I assume too much?”

His smile widens, his eyes wrinkling and cheeks nearly covering his eyes. Oh. It’s a beautiful sight, and one that doesn’t belong to you, you remind yourself. 

“It’s better than I could have hoped.” He replies and after paying, gives you a final smile and wave on his way out. 

You wish you understood the way your heart followed him through the doors. It was silly, and wrong. You shook off the feeling and got back to tending the flowers. Your dreams must be altering your expectations.

---

“You nearly had me.” He whispers into your neck, trailing gentle kisses across your collarbone. “This will all be better soon, I promise.“

You heave a sigh into his hair. Casting your gaze to the bouquet on the silver side table, engraved and ornate. Fireflies dance in the air around you and the skylight lets in the moonlight. You don’t know where he has taken you but you know you trust him with your everything.

“Why must we go so slow. If you found me, isn't that all there is?”

The tinkle of his laughter fills your ears, a  sound you will never get tired of. “Not so simple, Petal. You are a woman of much distrust. I have to snatch you up the way my kind always must, if I’m to have you.” His nose scrunches as he meets your eyes with another light giggle. 

"Remind me why you won't  just tell me? After all this time and you've finally  found 'day' me, but you won't just tell me who you are to me?"  

 You know you're pouting but it doesn't  feel fair. You're getting to an age where people are going to wonder if you're undeclared… if your someone is already  gone somehow. A cruel twist of fate before you'd even met. 

You don't  remember those things, of course, only the concepts around them, since your days slip from your mind at night the same way your nights slip your mind during the day.  It's unfair,  but loving Kihyun is worth it, will always be worth it.

"I'm sure you'd respond  wonderfully to 'Hello, I'm Kihyun. I'm  a fae living in the  woods past a ‘glamour and I help bring the flowers.  Oh, also I'm the man of your dreams.’" He poked your cheek gently with a laugh. "Oh! Literally. "

You scrunch up your nose in distaste but can't help the small huff of laughter. "Okay. Fine. If I heard that line I would likely never speak to you again. Cheesy." 

"You love the way I am. You have to. That’s what soulmates mean.”

You shudder as the room begins to fade, and fear clouds your eyes-you reach for him. “Not again. I’m not ready to forget you.”  

He gives you the same saddened, resigned face as every night. “You must wake. But you're still mine." His fingers begin to lose warmth against your cheeks as everything blurs.  “You’ll be with me again soon. When this is over there will be no end to us.”

The streaks of light cloud your vision and you rub your eyes. The smell of fresh flowers sours. 

You wake, and all is gone. 

----

“I never thought I’d see you sneaking around. Aren’t you supposed to be the good son?” 

Kihyun turned to meet his brother’s eyes, unsurprised he had been followed by the light footed prince. He wore a teasing smile and his dark prowling outfit, no doubt on his way into a colony somewhere to experience the nightlife without the guards. Byeongkwan was a bit more… Outgoing, than himself. 

Kihyun preferred to follow the rules, but the current situation was getting desperate. He was tired of the empty ache in his stomach when you weren’t there. He was tired of waiting for you to figure out something that was a bit too mystical for the human mind, and he was a bit too excited to hold you in the day time. It wouldn’t kill him to bend the rules a bit, just this once. After all, he was going to visit an artifact maker, not overthrow the Sirens.

“Yes well. Priorities.” He replied finally, watching his younger sibling’s smirk grow as he stepped into Kihyun’s space. Byeongkwan’s eyes sparkled and he genuinely looked full of glee at the discomfort Kihyun felt about disobeying. It wasn’t like he couldn’t do what he wanted… he was next in line for the throne… but there was a way things were done, to keep the glamour safe, and he wasn’t used to messing with the tried and true methods. 

“Priorities,” Byeongkwan replied, stepping back with mischief in his eyes still, hand raising to show the dangling chain he had unsurprisingly picked off of Kihyun. 

Always did have incredibly quick hands, that one. 

“So it’s related to your lady, then isn’t it. Y/N.” He sat in the windowsill, holding the necklace up for inspection. The royal jewel pendant on the end glittered with a rainbow prism when the light filtered through it, something akin to moonstone but with more magick, more fire. 

He squinted at his brother and held his hand out to receive the necklace. “Yes yes, you are a master of whispers and a knower of all secrets. I am suitably impressed. You can return it now.” 

Byeongkwan sighed, placing it directly in Kihyun’s palm. ”Taking it to the enchanter, hm? You want her to know. Everything. I think it’s nice.” He smiled, wholesome and for once without a hint of teasing. It would have been a pretty smile, if he hadn’t ended it with one flicked up eyebrow, closing Kihyun’s hand around the pendant. 

“Don’t lose this again.” He leaned in closer, this time with a glint that left Kihyun a little worried. “They won’t like this, and they already know.” His lips didn’t move, and his voice was too low to be picked up, it was likely he had used an enchantment of some kind, one without an incantation, which meant he genuinely believed they were being watched at this moment.

It took everything in Kihyun to not react or look for the source of the spying. Instead he smiled back in his most warm way. Nodding as he stepped back.

“She means everything, I won’t let this opportunity pass me up.”  Kihyun watched Byeongkwan’s smile take on the knowing edge that made him as dangerous as he was. The message had been received on both sides.  Kihyun needed to see you tonight, after dropping this necklace off. 

----

 “Loosen up, Y/N. You never know, you might meet your soulmate here! It’s not unusual for you to run into them in places like this.” Your friend laughed as she made a gesture to the rest of the dimly lit bar. It was open mic night and the person singing now was… less than fantastic.

Your head hurt and you wanted to leave. It was smelly and crowded and there were too many bodies in the tight space. “Right. Soulmate.” You nodded, knowing that wouldn’t happen. You couldn't even see his face how would you see him? You didn’t want to let out your secret so you forced a smile and lifted your drink to your lips. It was sweet, something that your friend had picked. It didn’t feel great going down, somewhat burning and the tingles it left in your fingertips were the only blessing. Perhaps with a buz it wouldn’t seem so sad that  you were in this place when you wanted to be at home under your fuzziest blanket in your biggest shirt. You tugged at the hem of your dress, something a bit tighter than you were used to,  but more than fitting for the scene.

“Yes. Soulmate. We are getting to be an age where we should and could meet them anywhere!” Your friend loved the idea, her smile sparkly and genuine. You matched it best you could and nodded to the change of singer, an older woman in her mid 50’s singing off key to Journey.

“Maybe there's yours.”  you teased and your friend rolled her eyes, laughing off your joke as she motioned that her glass was empty and made her way through the crowd and from your table to get a new one. 

You focused on the inside of your glass, uninterested in the crowd pushing in, when the song changed again and a voice that could only be described as hypnotic hit your ears. You looked up, shocked to find the man from the flower shop on the small stage, and somehow, his eyes found you as he sang. It stirred something in your chest, aligning the same as the other day. This time you would blame the combination of loneliness and alcohol, though. What you couldn’t explain away was the way his eyes burned into you as he sang, drifting closed only to hit notes that seemed far outside the average person’s vocal range. 

Something about him was too enthralling to miss a second of, so you drank him in thirstily, unable to quench the longing in you. When he finished and the entire bar erupted into applause, you swallowed thickly at the lump that had formed in your throat. You heard someone sit opposit you, and fully expected your friend, but were met with someone else's eyes. 

This guy… you’d seen him here on other nights. He was attractive, but he was a bit smoother than your tastes desired. His middle part exposed a regal brow set with a stud, eyes piercing and strong beneath them. He was far prettier than someone who belonged here, and he prowled the joint enough that you knew what he came here for. 

“Did you enjoy the song?” He asked voice so deep it resonated in your chest, banging around like a caged bird. His eyes flitted from the low neckline of your dress back up to your lips before settling on your eyes. 

“I think everyone did.” You replied as nonchalantly as you could. “He belongs on a real stage.”

For some reason, that amused your guest. He grinned, eyes sharp suddenly, leaning forward, all aloofness suddenly gone. 

The room felt fuzzier somehow, when he neared. “He certainly doesn’t belong here. You are right about that.”  He seemed to say it more to himself than to you, and it was strange that you felt the air a bit tinglier than before.  You glanced at your still half full second glass… you shouldn't be feeling this much this quickly.  You'd eaten.. and you'd been here over an hour…

"I.M. I think I saw your friends looking for you. Maybe you should go and meet them.”  It was him. He had come your way, the man from the shop, who sings so beautifully.  However, this time when he spoke, instead of a gentle voice, it had a sharpness to it that was unfamiliar. He seemed... Irked? Jealous? His handsome face was tight and lacked the soft smiles you had grown to love far too fast. Any trace of the pleasant wrinkles and endearing nose scrunches far gone. 

The man in the other seat, I.M as he had been called, was smirking knowingly at the Flower Guy. They stared silently at each other, one stoic, one amused. It wasn’t a cruel smile but there was an edge to it, like they were silently exchanging a conversation you weren’t privy to.  After a moment, his smirk turned to a full, bright smile, and he turned back to you, grasping your hand gently and placing a soft kiss on the top. “Pleasure to meet you, I’m sure we will see each other soon.” His deep voice had not lost its charm. 

You nodded back, “Perhaps.”  Was all you could think to say, your cheeks were burning but it wasn’t because of I.M’s low tones or flirty smiles, or even the way his lips had grazed your hands. It was the intense, unwavering stare of the Flower Guy. You felt nearly aflame under his gaze. As I.M departed you bit your lip, almost afraid to meet his dark eyes. 

When you did, you were pleased to see the darkness had seeped out, instead replaced with a different type of intensity, but his lips were turned up at the corners now. You’d have sighed in relief but you didn’t want him catch on.

“Petal. Pleasure to see you here.” His voice was soft again, as it had been the first time you met. It sent tingles down your spine. Or was that still the drink? You didn’t know. The air was too full, too full of oxygen and you were nearly heaving from the high of it.  

“Is it? I don’t even know your name, nor do you seem to know mine.” 

An eyebrow lifted in response, tongue darting to the corner of his lips momentarily as he considered his response. “Mh. I know your name, Y/n. Petal fits you better.”

Oh. Oh. Why did that make the inside of your chest feel so full? Your head was still light and silly. It didn’t make sense, but the closer Flower Guy got, the more grounded you felt. 

“Whole.” You murmured to yourself, slipping between your too loosened lips.

“What was that, Petal?” His teeth looked sharp again gleaming behind his lips. It must be a trick of the light dancing on their tips, and the fire water flowing in your veins. 

“Nothing. Just thinking about something.” You replied, licking your lips and hoping he wouldn't inquire further. 

Your phone buzzed on the table, blessedly giving you reprieve from his eyes. 

I’m leaving with Matt. You good? 

Your friend had rekindled with her on again off again fling clearly, and while you didn’t begrudge her a good time, you also weren’t sure you were going to sober up in time to be safely home. It was best to call for a car service, because you weren’t sure walking was a great idea in your state either.

“Everything alright?” His voice dragged you out of your thoughts, a finger gently unwrinkling your brow- you hadn’t even known that you had furrowed. 

“Yeah. My friend is leaving, so I should probably try to find a way home too. I didn’t come here for me.”  Flower Guy started to look concerned, his own brows so beautifully creasing. “I’d rather curl up in bed anyway, dreams are the best part of my day.” Your teeth dug into your bottom lip, realizing the whimsy in your voice was perhaps uncalled for with a new acquaintance. 

Inexplicably, it seemed to please him though, his eyes darted to the table top and he covered his smile behind one hand, clearing his throat before smoothing his face into a more neutral position and asking you. “Soulmate dreams, then?”

“Ah.” you frown, unsure how to answer. “I suppose. I can never remember. But I wake up happy. Happier than ever.”

Something indiscernible crosses his face and he smiles again, it’s one of the extra dazzling ones where his cheeks cover his eyes and his nose scrunches. “Oh. I should assist you in getting to your bed then. So you can be happy.”

Your eyebrows shot up in shock. He-What? His hands were already rising in defense, shaking them back and forth as though to push your thoughts away, his face panicked.

“NO! Oh. No. I meant.”  His cheeks puffed as he sucked in too much air and scratched the back of his neck. “I meant it in the way where I help you get a driver and make sure you get home safe. From outside. I won’t go in... to your bed. Where you sleep that's. Uh. That’s not what I meant and…” He was cute flustered, cheeks tinging pink and words rushing out on top of each other. You couldn't help but laugh, placing two fingers on his lips to stop the babble. 

“I got it. Thank you.”

He nodded, clearly still embarrassed. It didn’t stop his lips from pouting out slightly into the pressure from your fingers, so soft and…

No. Not a safe line of thought.  You had to admit that while you had initially found him attractive, every time you saw him it intensified. You were starting to wonder what made him smile. What made him infinitely happier. Was it the person he had gotten the flowers for?

 Why were you still touching him??

He didn’t speak more as your fingers dropped from his lips, instead he stared at your hand in your lap and stood, clearing his throat again. Then he took your hand in his own to help you to your feet. It would have been suave, and gone perfectly, had not some very intoxicated patron bumped directly into you and set you off balance as you lifted yourself, so instead you stumbled and fell on Flower Guy fully. He caught you, gripping you in a sheltering way to his toned and warm chest. 

When you looked into his eyes to thank him, the room seemed to slow. Nothing made sense for a moment. The entire universe took a moment to stem the tides of time and the only thing you saw was the shine within his gaze. The truth lay there, something about fate.

“Ah! Y/N!” 

.....And just like that, the spell was broken, you righted yourself, pushing gently against Flower Guy’s chest to do so. 

“Simon.” You nodded in the direction of the interruption.  

“Why are you here? You hate going out.. You have always hated going out. It’s part of why we didn’t work.” Simon looked smug and you just wanted to turn and walk away. He didn't deserve your time, after sleeping with other people in clubs because you were ‘no fun’.

Before you could defend yourself, Flower guy smirked, that hardened expression back. Instead, he replied for you. “That’s why we are headed home. If you’ll excuse us.”  You weren’t sure how he had so quickly read the vibe, but you were thankful, and now he had rescued you in some way or another, three times within the night. 

Simon stood back, fumbling to reply as Flower Guy entwined your fingers and cast you a sultry smile, the type you had yet to see, but very much hoped you’d see more of, because it forced your heart into your throat.. “Let’s go, Petal.”  Before leading you out onto the sidewalk.

He hailed a cab and still got inside, but not until assuring you he was only doing it so he could pay and take it to his own home. 

You thanked him as you got out in front of your building, and asked him for his name.  He only smiled and said. “Next time, Petal. Third time is always a charm.”

You weren't sure why, but as the door to the cab slammed shut before you, you knew your dreams were going to be more... intense this time. 

----

 "You're impossible.  Irredeemable. I do not condone it." Kihyun is half serious and his scolding comes with the lightest of taps on your rear, as though punishment for your so called crimes.  It doesn’t last though, and as gentle as it was to start with, he runs his hands over the spots he swatted  reverently.  “It’s naughty. You are in trouble.” His lips pout prettily with the words and you want to be serious but you can’t.

You're laughing, cuddled into his embrace, you don't take offense because his voice has that teasing note that means you're about  to be complimented. 

"Am I?" You ask with softly pouted lips, gazing up into his eyes through your lashes.

"Yes. You're in a lot of trouble, Petal. You draw others to you like wil o’ whisps to a lost traveler. AND those you draw are of my people, dangerous and seductive. " he is trying to frown, and you can tell worries lie behind his eyes, but he's  too full of love for you make  to you feel any true shame. 

"Seductive? Are you being jealous?" You crave his jealousy. You know what nights it brings you when he is on fire with  it. The way it makes his movements less careful and adoring, more desirous and heady. 

You love it when he devours your love like the sweetest dessert. 

"Jealous? Perhaps. Worried? More than I can say. Impatient for you to come to me? Ardently. I want to steal you away.  Scoop you up into my arms and drag you to the veil. When I  finally get you,  you'd better be ready."  Danger sparks in his eyes. The exact type of danger that makes your skin too tight and your fingers itch to wrap around him. You love it when he pushes you to the brink of desire… 

"You're a silver tongued seducer on your own. Why would  I ever turn to another?" You question, breathless and leaning in to him as a reed sways in the wind. 

"You won't." And you know he's right.  The words drip off his sweetened silver tongue so full of promises you know he will keep. After all… fae can't  lie.

He's  laid his soul bare for you so many nights, that games aren't what  he wants. There isn't  a riddle in the way between you. Just circumstances.

 All deception would do is complicate your arrival  and his impatience is too overwhelming. 

"Because I'm still yours."  You remind him, as the fog begins to roll in with the sun, and he nods, bittersweet and determined. 

"I’ll make it right." He whispers.

You gasp awake, clutching your heaving chest and wondering why your skin felt alight.  You swallowed and gazed at the sun coming up.  For some reason, you felt so loved. Someone out there felt things for you that you could hardly fathom. You still couldn’t see a face, but some missing piece clicked now. You felt the emotions. Longing, happiness, affection, impatience.  Something was different, this morning. 

When  you saw fresh  sweet peas by your bed again you couldn’t bite back your grin.

 It would be a new day

----

The line at the cafe was a bit shorter than usual and you considered yourself lucky, hustling inside before your shift at the flower shop.  Your apron was hanging out of your jacket pocket and you were very ready for your daily cold brew. The wind wasn’t quite cold enough to bite your fingertips and force you to switch to your winter drink. 

The jingle of the bell behind you didn’t catch your attention until you smelled that strange floral freshness that drew you in. Flower Guy, it had to be, no one else could elicit the same response, your heart quickening pace and your fingertips buzzing. Should you turn around and greet him? No isn’t that strange, considering you shouldn’t recognize him by smell?? 

Stay cool, y/n, stay cool. Instead you go up and order your drink, lightly sweetened and stand off to the side pretending not to see him out of the corner of your eye. Hiding behind your hair as you lift your phone as though you are texting someone. He’s watching you, and biting his bottom lip to hold back a smile. His head tilts to one side and you notice his hair has changed a little. It’s still soft pink, but now it also has an undercut, and the way it’s swooped away from his brow bone has your heartbeat quickening, even without a solid look at him. His eyebrows lift and he seems about to say something to you, but instead goes to the counter to order since the line has moved. You notice him settle in standing beside you as he waits for his drink. 

“Petal. I told you there would be a third meeting, didn’t I?” His voice is as honeyed and smooth as ever, and you have to bite back the little noise you so desperately want to make.  

Trying to act as though you are surprised it’s him, you look up and smile gently. “Oh. Hello. You also told me that on the third meeting you would tell me your name, didn’t you.”

He does that beautiful, breathtaking smile again, the one that causes creases to form beside his eyes and lights your soul up like the sun. 

“I did. And I will. Let’s sit for a minute.”  He tilts his head to indicate a nearby table. You check your watch, unsure if you have time to sit before work. 

You have never been late before though, and your boss wouldn’t scold you if it wasn’t very late…

You meet his eyes and nod, taking a seat as he slides across from you. “I’m glad I saw you here… I was going to go by the shop soon in fact, because there’s something I needed to talk to you about. I thought it would entice you into coming somewhere with me.”

You want to blurt out that everything about him is enticing, alive, and enchanting but you manage to control it. Instead you laugh a little and look at your hands on the table, where his fingers slowly, and with plenty of time for you to stop him, gently lace in between yours on the table. Your palms don’t meet, and it’s not quite holding hands, but it means something and you can tell. 

You don’t want to be conflicted but you are, because those flowers were for some one. 

“What about your…” You search for the right word, eyes darting from his fingers to his lips to the fringe that tickles the side of his brow. “Person? The one you got the bouquet for.” You clarify.  

He giggles. 

Giggles. 

“What if I told you that was a ploy to talk to you?” Mischief sparkles in his eyes and he brushes up and down your index finger with his thumb, the tiniest touch is making your chest feel tight and full and you are realizing it is getting harder and harder to deny that this feels what people explain. This feels like soulmates? But it was a slow fall, not that instant dunk into a freezing tank of water, instead, it was like you had been in water that was warm, and it was slowly getting hotter and hotter, and you had  barely realized it before it began to boil. 

It didn’t fit the descriptions, but it meant something, it had to. 

“I would-" but you were cut off by the ringing of his phone. He gave you an apologetic smile and checked it. The frown that crept onto his face told you that it wasn’t good. .

“I have to take this.”  He said, but he looked torn and hurt by it. 

“It’s an emergency. We’ll catch up next time. Maybe fourth time is the real charm, for us.” You said with a small smile, trying to convince him you were okay with it. He squeezed your hand in his reassuringly before scuffling out of the coffee shop, forgetting his drink on the counter as he did. You got up to grab both drinks and saw a small blue box on the chair he had been in.  As you returned to the table to investigate, you saw there was  “Petal” written on it in neat handwriting.  This was for you? 

You picked up the box and put it in your jacket pocket, and hurried out in the direction he had gone, hoping to catch him in the parking lot with the coffee. 

The wind was blowing your hair into your face and making it hard to see, but you were rushing too much to care. It took a moment to go through and realize that he was long gone, and you held the two coffees and chewed your lip, trying to figure out what to do. 

“Look! A lost flower in the big city.” A deep familiar voice was too close, causing you to jump forward and spin to meet their gaze. I.M  Strange, but he seemed to know your Flower Guy.

You greeted him with an uneasy smile.  “Oh, hi, did you see… I-I don’t know his name?”

A smile slowly stretched across his face, eyes sparkling with some mischief.  “Your darling? I can help you find him. For a price.”

You squint for a moment, something about the situation felt a little.. Off?  “What kind of price?”

“Oh don’t worry. It won’t seem like much. But I may have need of a favor from you. No money or tricks. Just a no questions asked favor.” I.M looked  more honest but you still felt uncertain. Flower Guy hadn’t seemed to like him so much, unless that was just jealousy… You didn’t have much of a choice, something inside you nagged at  you that Flower Guy needed you for something. An inner calling that began beneath your ribs and wrapped into each one like a vine. The constriction was suffocating. You didn’t know why, but you knew you needed to go to him… Was it worth the price? 

Deciding that it was better to give a favor to this man than to have something bad happen, you nodded. “Alright. One favor. Within REASON.” 

The smile that slid onto his face made you question your decision but you stayed resolute.  Something was wrong, and you needed to help. 

He extended his hand to you in a deep bow, you scoffed but took it, and he lead you away. 

----

The greenery around you was lush and vibrant, and the smell in the air was the same as that ozone smell before a storm. You felt uneasy but at home all at once, and it made your skin itch as you drew your arms across your chest in defensive posture. 

Coffees long forgotten, the box in your pocket felt heavy for some reason, the air around you grew still. You eyed I.M as he turned around finally, eyes unreadable. 

“We approach the faerie ring. Once you get inside, we will have to activate it, and that will get us through the veil.” He was explaining, but it didn’t make sense. 

“The what? What are you saying?“ Your head was shaking and your hand instinctively went to your pocket again. The box was.. Vibrating?

He fully tuned to face you, heaving a sigh. “All right I will make this fast and lover boy can flesh out the details when everything is better okay? Let’s start here.” He waved around to indicate the area. “This is a portal. I protect the portal.” He points to the small grassy patch that while untouched with light, is brighter than the rest of the forest floor. It is  a perfect circle lined with flowers of exotic beauty and the air around it shimmers a bit in the dim lighting. “Your lover boy and I are both fae. I don’t need to explain that do I?”

“Ah. Maybe? I don’t know. Magic is real?” You squinted in confusion but his face fell to full deadpan in response. 

“Soulmates are basically magic, but fae are a stretch? Don’t be silly. Just like. Ground rules. Don’t give anyone your full name. Fake name or partial name only, understood? Also We can’t lie but we are really good at deceiving with words so be careful. The rest is less important. Anyway. Your darling is in there-” He points back to the ring again. “And he is probably in trouble. He gave you something today right?” 

You nod. “Well, he was going to but he got a call and left. Which you saw. He dropped it on his way out.” You fish the box out of your pocket. “It’s buzzing. Is this magic?” 

I.M looked slightly envious for a moment, tongue darting out before he replied. “Yeah. Open it. Now. You’ll need it.” 

���I wanted to ask him about it before I-” You began but when his eyes met yours, steely and serious, you decided to listen. Opening the box gently, you pulled a chord inside. It was silvery but a bit heavier than one would expect for how thin the chain was. It was a necklace of some kind, with a stone hanging from the end pendant style that seemed to be shining with inner light. It was almost opalescent, rainbows sparking inside. When it touched your skin you gasped, and electricity leapt through your body in arcs that should have left you stunned but instead left you gasping and awakened. 

The air got even more shimmery, and when you looked  at I.M he looked startled, his mouth fell open and he pointed at you while you slowly rolled your shoulders against the thrumming in your veins.  

Slowly, your regained your normal footing, realizing things felt different, inside and out. You felt different. 

“Sly.”  I.M said with a giggle. “You are one of us. Or partially. Guess my favor is even better now.”

“I don’t.” You began before things began to shift and bend around you, almost as though you yourself had a bubble around you refracting light… “I.M, touch me.” 

His eyebrows raised, but he did as you asked, lifting his hand only to have it forcefully blasted back as he reached your bubble. Sparks arched from the place he touched, sizzling as though it would burn him if he tried again.

“You absolute… This is great, turn it off so we can go and get him?” 

You nodded, concentrating on bringing the bubble in closer to your skin, then pressing itself back into the gem. You didn’t know HOW you knew to, but you knew it was the thing to do. 

As you stepped inside the fairy ring, reality itself seemed to shift. You closed your eyes and when you opened them, you were in a forest much thicker, much more foriegn. 

The wildlife was exotic, and shimmers danced into your vision.

Flashes of silk and skin kept playing in your head. Ki.. His name bounced on and off the tip of your tongue in the most irritating fashion. But you knew how he tasted, how he felt flush against you. How his lips felt pressed against the crown of your head. You knew he brought you flowers.

You knew he was yours. 

But it wasn’t time to revel in memories, so you turned to I.M who was still regarding you carefully.  “By now, they’ll have him cornered. Come on.” 

You nodded and followed but still called out to ask him who has him and why. 

“Usurpers. Your sweetheart is the 1st prince of the Seelie court, and word got out about you. You being human and all. It caused the already more tricky members of court to stage a coup. That’s where we come in. “ He waggled his eyebrows and it occurred to you that  he genuinely was a good person, if a little feisty. You liked him more each moment. 

“And how do YOU know about this plot?”  

His smile was jagged at its edges as he cut through a passage and lead you further along. “Oh. I know people, you know?”

You didn’t know, but there wasn’t time to dig into I.M’s world too deeply when you were still recovering memories as they slid into place on their own.

Laughter in sheets and silvery moonlight, nicknames and promises. Years of it, years of being his without knowing. 

You two kept mostly quiet as you slid through the tunnels. The air felt colder, but not quite damp, still, some pressure on your skin akin to humidity, but with more life set you on edge.

I.M motioned for you to come close, and pointed out into the opening ahead.

There was a ring of creatures, shades of blues and purples some with wings and some without, all surrounding Ki-, the man, your man. 

Your prince

You corrected. He didn’t look overly concerned, in fact, he almost seemed confident even surrounded as he was. You couldn’t make out the conversation but there were weapons pointed at him, and panic filled your gut.

“What can I do?”

“We’re cloaked best we can be. You’re going to have to get right in the middle of all of that and activate the gem. Do you think you can?”

His laughter soft and happy in your ear, breath bouncing off your skin sending shivers down your spine. The way his fingers traced the sides of your face. Your soulmate, yours all along.  

 You nodded with firm conviction. You would have to.  “I can do whatever I need to.” 

I.M smiled back at you, gave your hand a reassuring pat and pointed. “Then go get him.”

----

You sucked your breath in and held in on approach. You could hear your heart beating in your ears but you knew there wasn’t a choice. Thinking quickly,  you pretended to fall, the noise drawing the attention of the entire group.

 Kihyun looked up at you eyes widened,  alarmed and upset.  His head began to shake and mouth formed an “O”. The panic in his eyes made you feel guilty, but he didn’t know your plan.  

“Who is that? Is that her?”  A blue skinned creature that stood roughly 6ft tall asked with a graveled voice. 

Kihyun’s eyes were steely and angry, he looked ready to make a move and you wished you could calm him. There were too many of them and they were heavily armed. You needed to goad them into getting you closer to him.

“Aren’t we lucky.Now they can watch each other die.” A smaller one with sharp jagged teeth said, chuckling. 

“If you even-” Kihyun began before a harsh slap rang out and he fell to the ground. You lunged towards him without thinking, only to be stopped suddenly.

“Please. Let me see him.” You begged, you needed to be sure he was okay.

When a pale fae with purple hair and sharpened claws grabbed your arm you winced, he was dragging you to your feet and into the middle.  “You’ll see him. You’ll see him bleed out.” 

You were pushed towards where he was getting back to his feet, he stumbled but he caught you in his arms, trying to wrap his body around you and check you for injury. 

Electricity traveled inside your veins immediately, and for a moment you were lost in memories, lost in dreams... 

Silver moonlight in pink hair. Giggles and secrets and kisses. Hot skin on cool nights and promises made between glistening lips. The feather soft beat of his eyelashes against your cheek as he sings softly to you. The way your heartbeat syncs into his and drags you home. Home is him, and it’s all real. It’s a blur, but then it’s part of you, he’s part of you.

You see him, much younger, much more excited.

“You belong here as much as I do, this power is as much yours as it is mine. You are one of us, even if it’s just a little bit.”  His scrunched nose makes you weak with happiness and you feel the air sparkle with your combined magick. That little bit in your veins is enough to feel the words he says are true. 

“So I really won’t remember you in the morning? We only just met!”  You want to stay in this place with him.

“You won’t. Because I am not human, and neither are you. Or at least not all of the way. We’ll make it work, I’ll find my way to you.”

When you opened your eyes again, Kihyun was panicking, saying something to you, but your ears were still ringing. You smiled reassuringly and touched his face, cupping his cheek with one hand as you squeezed tight to the necklace in your pocket with the other, and the shimmering light enveloped you both.

He was smiling, then, and holding onto you as the fae outside began trying to attack, only to be bounced back by the shield that surrounded you.

“Hi,” you said to him, ignoring the ruckus, “It’s nice to see you again, Kihyun. My Kihyun. My soulmate.” 

His eyes were watering and he was laughing, holding your face in both his hands as he realized you had returned to him. “It worked. It worked and you remember don’t you?” He peppered kisses across your forehead and cheeks, with giggles. “This is real! This is real and you’re mine.”

You didn’t think before you acted, only knew that he had to be closer to you. Gripping the back of his neck, you tugged his face closer to yours and tilted your head to press your lips to his. Softly, at first, and then firmly when he breathed into the kiss and tightened his hold, hands pressing into your lower back and pulling you up into him. You swear you had never felt so full and so alive at once, his lips the perfect blend of soft and harsh. This was the kind of kiss people wrote songs about, the kind of fairy tail nonsense that was fed to you as a child. But here, in his arms, there didn’t seem to be a single thing in the world more magical than the press of his lips desperate to  know you as well in reality as they had in dreams.

You eventually pulled back, albeit unwillingly, your foreheads joined as you both caught your breath.

He glanced up, reluctant to look away but knowing the threat was still present. You followed his gaze when a huge smile lit his face.

“You didn’t have to wait so long to help out, but you always did have a flair for the dramatic.” He’s speaking to a smaller man outside the bubble, silver hair and a sneaky smile. He’s handsome too, with round eyes that tilt up at the ends. 

“We had a plan. You should trust us more.” He insists as I.M joins at his side, there’s others in hoods and robes also all around, apprehending the group

I.M looks slyer than ever, “You still owe me, highness.”

“I’m not-” you begin, only to be cut off by Byeongkwan who is smirking and Kihyun.

“You will be, pleasure to meet you, sister in law.” He winks at you and turns to make a hand sign at the group around him. “We’ll take care of this. You guys head back.”

You slowly let go of the jewel in your pocket, retracting the shimmering light. Kihyun refuses to let you go, clutching onto your hand and lacing your fingers. 

You walk off knowing that things will be okay, that whatever is next, together you’d figure it out.

----------------------------------------------EPILOGUE----------------------------------

The sheets are silken. The bedside table is silver. The room has a skylight.

You smell life and flowers and  Kihyun and the scent of your skin combined. 

There’s no fog to usher you back into the day, there is nothing rushing you away from this dream. 

You snuggle deeper into his hold, he murmurs in his sleep from you shifting, eyes fluttering open to regard you blearily. 

“Hello Princess.” His voice is lower and thick with sleep, you’re nearly overwhelmed with love,the way your skin tingles and your breath quickens at his touch.

“Hello, Prince.” You respond as his lips brush yours lovingly, starting soft and deepening as you tightened your grip. 

His fingers danced along the skin of your collar bone, drifting down your arms to stroke your skin lovingly. The heat between you was always present, but as he grunted into the kiss and rolled you onto your back, teeth glistening in the dark, you knew that this was going to be a longer night. And you had all night...

This time, you weren’t lost in a dream, you were lost in him, and that was perfectly alright....

[cyanwings]

i'm sorry you aren't feeling good, my bean! 33, 20, 18, 2, and 1

@jimmy-valmer

It’s okay! I mean, it sucks big time cause I feel like a truck ran over me from the body aches but I’ve handled worse. I’m a WARRIOR!!!

ON TO THE MIGHTY MEMESS~!!!

ANIME QUESTIONS MEME - Accepting!

1. best anime you’ve watched

So for the record, I’m excluding “Avatar: The Last Airbender” & (2003) “Teen Titans” shows cause people consider them animes when they’re only anime influenced so they’re out. But, this is SO hard! It’s like picking my children, it just feels impossible to do! Though, if I HAD to pick just one, it would have to be…… ( 2003) Kino’s Journey!

Why? Well, let’s ride right into the world of “Kino’s Journey” or in it’s original title “Kino no Tabi.”

“ The world is not beautiful, there fore it is.”

Let’s start with the story, which tells of the journey of a traveler named Kino and their motorcycle, Hermes, while they visit a long range of countries as they meet different people along the way. The actual fact is: there isn’t one solid story but 12 short stories that link together not by episode order but by events. And yet the fact that each one of this stories manages to give a deeper meaning than the whole plots from many animes amazes me till no end! Kino finds herself in the midst of these societies - some of which have downright appalling practices. Each episode approaches a theme of society, like censoring, violence, communication problems, right or wrong, the ability some people have to bite the hand that just feds them, and so on. And every time I watch each one, I found myself enjoying this series more than I should have.  

As Kino travels throughout the world and becomes acquainted with the people who inhabit it, it becomes clear that each of her encounters is essentially a separate journey into the labyrinth that is the human psyche to explore one of the many elements that make it up. The issues touched upon in the series ranges from the tendencies of humans to blindly believe in prophecies to the consequences of not having a self-conscious.

There is a wide range of characters as expected from an anime that tells about travels all over the world. While some of them are forgettable, some of them also stay in your mind. Although it is clear that neither Kino nor Hermes is the main focus of the series, together they play an essential role in its series. 

In terms of being a likeable character, Kino has become my favorite anime character ever! They inspire me in so many ways and I’m always glued to the screen every time their role comes into play. Although they appear apathetic at first, they’re a caring and understanding person. Kino travels through different countries to experience their customs and understand the citizens, but they never stay longer than three days, as they’re afraid of settling down, and would decrease of being a traveler. They’re also intelligent, skillful, extremely wise for someone so young and still as unpredictable as a teen could be. Though not fond of killing, they will do so if necessary without feeling remorse. Especially, towards those who attack them or the innocent. Kino has truly become one of the most unique characters I’ve ever seen.

Hermes, Kino’s talking motorcycle, acts as the perfect companion to his owner. Not only are his conversations with Kino very enjoyable to listen to due to the his humour, the series also allows for further exploration on his character. I won’t lie that I found it odd that we were suppose to just roll with the fact that he speaks but as the show grows over time, you do learn to accept it and that’s not the most unusual thing you’ll be seeing in the series either. He’s also the closest thing that Kino has to a friend and it just makes their relationship heartwarming a lot of the time. In addition, considering the theme of the series is the nature of humanity, his presence as a non-human makes their discussions even more interesting. You have no idea if he’s truly real or just in Kino’s head. But, whatever the case may be, he’s a fun character to journey with!

The dub is honestly one of the best that I’ve heard and I’m usually REALLY picky when it comes to English audio in anime. It was done at A.D.V films, which are the people responsible for other great dubs like “Princess Tutu”, and they do an AMAZING job!

Kelli Collins voicing Kino was the highlight of the entire dub! Her acting glues you into her role to her character and you’re just amazed of how well she fits the Kino. Especially, giving the young traveler a sense of maturity to such a young teen. It’s a shame she hasn’t been active since then and didn’t return for the reboot of the series. ( Even though it was a disaster so maybe it was for the best. ) Kino’s voice actress succeeds as the perfect person to voice such a outstanding character and how she brings her to life. I honestly can’t even picture anyone else to play the role but her. Hermes on the other hand is a hit or miss with viewers. Cynthia Martinez voicing Hermes comes off with a cartoonish boyish voice who I could definitely see annoying it’s viewers.  But to me? It honestly works! The way Hermes asks certain questions and their responses makes sense that they act childish or ask very out-looking questions of the situations at hand. Not not say he’s immature. He’s actually the voice of reason but, Cynthia shows great promise with the role. And you’ll see why once you go into this series head on.

Overall this series holds a special place in my heart. It doesn’t have that nasty fan service or anything too over the top like a Shōnen show but, it helped me get a better understanding on how humanity works and even thinks at times. In life, we don’t know which path to take but that’s the journey of it. You just get up and travel to find out what’s up ahead for you. To see the world for what it is with all it’s good and bad parts. Kino searches for life’s answers, life’s questions, and the interpretations connected to them. Destination is a state of mind; Drift along for the ride~!

2. worst anime you’ve watched

Oh gawd, this is just torture! Just when I think I can finally be rid of trash like this I have to go back and look in the bin again lmao

Let’s see…. I think I would have to say…. “ Master of Martial Hearts.” Why didn’t I say the famous “School Days?” I could but I wanted to do a different hate this time since this one made me beyond pissed off! “School Days” at least had the main lead get what’s coming to him cause we all know the douche bad deserved what was coming to him so I was fine with the insane out come. But this? HELL NO!

I found this series out by amazing reviewer, JesuOtaku, back when Youtube was starting to get popular and I always agreed with her reviews. I’m SO glad I saw her review first before stumbling upon this nasty series. First, we got under aged girls, and women in general, getting their clothes completely ripped apart as they fight one another cause why not? Screw plot! And it’s just an endless scenes of just wtf??!! I didn’t watch the series but I saw enough of it through her long review. AND…what pissed me off the most is the ending. Dear gawd! THE ENDING! This series only has 5 episodes but once you check out the last one? It deserves two middle fingers straight at it cause F*CK THIS SERIES!! No seriously, don’t even check it cause it’s just horrible. Just awful!! It’s just the worst anime to me and always will be!

    18. favorite villain

This is gonna sound strange but I instantly KNEW who my favorite villain was gonna be and I couldn’t be more ready! When there’s a great hero there’s also a great villain. Out of the horrible characters did I choose? Johan from (2004) “Monster.”

“ There’s nothing special about being born. Not a thing. Most of the universe is just death, nothing more. In this universe of ours, the birth of a new life on some corner of our planet is nothing but a tiny, insignificant flash. Death is a normal thing. So why live? ”

–Johan

The story focuses on Kenzo Tenma, a young Japanese doctor working at the Eisler Memorial Hospital during in Germany the 80′s. He is a very skilled highly brain surgeon. However, Tenma grows increasingly dissatisfied with the political bias of the hospital for treating it’s patients, and seizes his chance to change things after a strange massacre brings the twins Johan and Anna Liebert into his hospital.

Johan has a gunshot wound to the head and Anna keeps muttering about killing. Tenma decides to operate on Johan instead of a politician who arrived afterwards. Johan is saved, but the politician dies. After this Tenma loses his social standing, lost his promotion, basically everything, and not soon after that the twins escape. The top heads of the hospital are found dead the same night the twins escape. Tenma is then promoted to chef of surgeon.

After that the story advances to nine years later. A known criminal is found on the street, hit by a car. He comes under the care of Dr. Tenma, who observes him muttering about a “Monster.” Tenma extends his kindness to that criminal, and thus the criminal begins to open up to his doctor.

Following his trail to the construction site of a half finished building near the hospital, Tenma finds the man. The man, who has developed a sort of doctor-patient friendship with Dr. Tenma, warns him against coming closer, and pleads with him to run away. Tenma refuses, however, and the identity of the man holding the gun pointed at the criminal in the abandoned parking garage is revealed to be the boy whose life Tenma had saved nine years ago - Johan Liebert. Johan shoots the criminal, tells Tenma that he could never kill the man who had saved his life, and then walks off into the night while Tenma is still too shocked to stop him. I’m not gonna spoil anymore to the plot cause it’ll ruin the experience but WOW! What a series!

On the surface, Johan is a well-mannered, charismatic and compassionate young man. He possesses a favorable of traits and can easily overwhelm individuals with his seemingly flawless nature, as others describes him as being not of this world. This makes it easy for him to make new allies and manipulate them into doing various deeds for him. With such skill in creating this facade of perfection and pureness, Johan can hide his true motives with ease.

Johan delivers destruction and suffering to those who happen to fall prey to his schemes. Johan exhibits psychopathic tendencies. For example, most of his murders, both in childhood and adulthood, have been premeditated and calculated.

Johan often shows a complete disregard for life by pointing to his forehead, inviting Dr. Tenma to shoot him.

He also has a tendency to make his victims experience the worst possible loss and suffering rather than actually killing them himself;

Everyone NEEDS to check out “ Monster ” cause it does not disappoint! Even just check out just for it’s villain and the amazing english dub! Trust me, it’ll be one incredible wild ride!

  20. favorite costume/character design:

My girl, Mina Ashido from “My Hero Academia” / “Boku no Hero Academia”!

“The old you’s not going anywhere with that emo look on your face! If you overcome that gloomy self of yours… let me know. Or else I’ll start spreading rumors about high school debut man.”

—

Mina Ashido

    33. most underrated anime in your opinion

Since I already talked about “ Kino’s Journey” & “ Monster”, I’ll decide another great underrated anime people need to see and that’s “ Princess Tutu.”

“ May those who follow their fate be granted happiness; may those who defy it be granted glory.“ - Miss Edel

In a fairy tale come to life, the clumsy, out-going, and gentle Ahiru (“Duck” in the English Dub) seems like an unlikely protagonist. In reality, Ahiru is just as magical as the talking cats and crocodiles that inhabit her town—for Ahiru really is a duck! Transformed by the mysterious Drosselmeyer into a human girl, Ahiru soon learns the reason for her existence. Using her magical egg-shaped pendant, Ahiru can transform into Princess Tutu—a beautiful and talented ballet dancer whose dances relieve people of the turmoil in their hearts. With her newfound ability, Ahiru accepts the challenge of collecting the lost shards of her prince’s heart, for long ago he had shattered it in order to seal an evil raven away for all eternity.

Princess Tutu is a tale of heroes and their struggle against fate. Their beliefs, their feelings, and ultimately their actions will determine whether this fairy tale can reach its "happily ever after.”

The title may seem off putting to a lot since it sounds like some girly anime but don’t judge a book by it’s cover~! This series has so much going for it and it’s honestly just outstanding! It may be predictable at the beginning ( Had the same trouble with the first season of “Avatar: The Last Airbender” ) but, it becomes something you just never expected; A complex and tragedy story.

You honestly feel for every single one of these characters once their parts are given into play. And the fact that they use real classical music that compliments the dance scenes so well done. You feel the dramatic effect once our main leads come into the spotlight. The intense just rises from the music and for the dubbing too. I said back in my “Kino’s Journey” part of the ask that this was dubbed by A.D.V. Films and it’s one of my favorites ever! It’s not just one or two actors that shine, every single person portrays their characters with flying colors. I was just amazed of how incredibly well done they did!

I could go on and on about the characters but they’re all such a surprise that I rather not spoil it. This is genuinely a heartwarming show to experience for yourself. Classical music, beautifully choreographed dances, and memorable characters make for an experience worth having in all of Princess Tutu’s world. A modern fairy tale for the ages.

[hellosaltysaladcollectionstuff]

Back to Sundance we go for another year of discovery. What's on the line-up this year? Out of the 110+ films showing at the 2019 Sundance Film Festival, I've chosen 10 that I'm looking forward to seeing the most. To keep things well balanced, I've chosen 5 feature films and 5 documentaries from the line-up. There are so many films playing at the fest, and so many I'll end up seeing (30+), that this is a quick list to get everyone acquainted with some of the work premiering in 2019 (I just want to go see everything). There are new films from filmmakers like Ritesh Batra and Lulu Wang, and incredible documentaries that are also worthy of our attention, plus many other films. You never really know what will good or bad, but here's my first few picks.

This is my 13th year in a row returning to Sundance, starting back in 2007. I'm so excited to be attending Sundance once again, and can't wait to dive into the films more than anything. There's so many I am curious to watch from this year's line-up. For now, here's my Top 10 most anticipated films before the fest begins.

Alex's Most Anticipated \Sundance 2019/ Feature Films:

Hala Directed by Minhal Baig

I've been following filmmaker Minhal Baig (mostly on Twitter @minhalbaig) for a while now, and she is ready to finally break out big and show everyone how talented she really is. Hala is her second feature film following her debut 1 Night, and it's much more personal this time. The story is about a Muslim teenager named Hala - played by Geraldine Viswanathan - who lives in Chicago with her immigrant parents from Pakistan. There she copes with the unraveling of her family as she comes into her own. It's a coming-of-age story but told from an entirely different angle that we rarely see, as Sundance explains that Baig "brings a vital and layered female perspective to the coming-of-age genre." They add that she "crafts a character and story with immense relatability and unexpected consequence." I've been looking forward to seeing this ever since I first heard about it, and I'm excited that it's finally ready to premiere at Sundance. Congrats, Minhal.

Photograph Directed by Ritesh Batra

Back in 2013, I fell in love with a little film called The Lunchbox, starring Irrfan Khan and Nimrat Kaur. After making two other English-language films, Our Souls at Night and The Sense of an Ending (both from 2017), filmmaker Ritesh Batra returns to his roots and his hometown in India with Photograph. Set in Mumbai, the film is about a struggling street photographer, pressured to marry by his grandmother, who convinces a shy stranger to pose as his fiancée. The pair develops a connection that transforms them in ways that they could not expect. As a photographer myself, I'm already intrigued. But I've also got a good feeling this might be a magical, lovely new film from Ritesh Batra and I'm looking forward to seeing where he takes us. If it's anywhere close to as sweet and as honest as The Lunchbox was, it will be another instant favorite.

Little Monsters Directed by Abe Forsythe

There's always one or two films in the Midnight section that I have to see, just because they sound so crazy and fun. Little Monsters is exactly one of those that I'm going to stay up late to watch. Described as a "film dedicated to all the kindergarten teachers who motivate children to learn, instill them with confidence, and stop them from being devoured by zombies." The massively talented Lupita Nyong'o stars as that teacher, taking on an extra bloody role that will hopefully allow her to show off more of her badass side. Plus there's always room for more zombies movies, right? Why not, they're always entertaining. "Armed only with the resourcefulness of kindergartners, [they] must work together to keep the monsters at bay and carve a way out with their guts intact." I'm fairly certain this will be a good one, especially with the late night audience.

I Am Mother Directed by Grant Sputore

One of the few sci-fi films playing at Sundance, which means I have to see it no matter what. But it also looks and sounds compelling. I Am Mother features a robot designed by Weta Workshop in New Zealand, and marks the directorial debut of an award-winning commercials director from Australia named Grant Sputore. And yes, the story seems quite promising. A teenage girl is raised underground by a kindly robot "Mother" - designed to repopulate the earth following the extinction of humankind. But their unique bond is threatened when an inexplicable stranger arrives with alarming news. This reminds me a bit of Moon (which premiered at Sundance 2009) mashed up with other sci-fi concepts. The robot's design is familiar but sleek, and the handful of images they've released so far all look better than expected. Don't let me down, Sputore.

Velvet Buzzsaw Directed by Dan Gilroy

So, this looks awesome! And totally insane! And weird, and captivating, and funny, and twisted, and sly, and wicked, and frightening. Velvet Buzzsaw is the latest film written & directed by Dan Gilroy, a screenwriter who turned director (or perhaps became a true auteur) making his debut with Nightcrawler in 2014, and following that up with Roman J. Israel, Esq. in 2017. This time he attacks the art world, with a film that seems to be about pieces of art coming to life and killing people. Something like that. The cast also is quite impressive: Jake Gyllenhaal, John Malkovich, Toni Collette, Rene Russo, Daveed Diggs. And this looks like the perfect follow-up to Ruben Östlund's Palme d'Or winning film The Square, with both films mocking and lambasting the absurdity of the modern art world. I'm so there. Watch the official trailer here.

More Feature Films I'm Looking Forward To Seeing: Lulu Wang's The Farewell, Rashid Johnson's Native Son, Paul Downs Colaizzo's Brittany Runs A Marathon, Nisha Ganatra's Late Night, David Wnendt's The Sunlit Night, Makoto Nagahisa's funky We Are Little Zombies, Noble Jones' The Tomorrow Man, Bert&Bertie's Troop Zero, JD Dillard's Sweetheart, Patrick Brice's Corporate Animals, Tayarisha Poe's Selah and the Spades, Daniel Scheinert's The Death of Dick Long, and May el-Toukhy's Queen of Hearts.

Alex's Most Anticipated \Sundance 2019/ Documentaries:

Memory: The Origins of Alien Directed by Alexandre O. Philippe

A documentary about the making of Ridley Scott's original Alien! Say no more, I'm already there, I wouldn't miss this for anything. This is the latest doc film made by Swiss filmmaker Alexandre O. Philippe, who has been making docs about cinema and filmmaking for a while - including The People vs. George Lucas, and 78/52: Hitchcock's Shower Scene just before. I'm curious how much this will cover and how much it will uncover. It seems to focus more on how they came up with the original ideas and designs for the film, less so the filming or release. "Philippe's real interest lies in the deep resonance of myths and our collective unconscious. The strange symbiotic collaboration between Alien creators [Dan] O'Bannon, Scott, and H.R. Giger suggests a greater synchronicity across history, art, and storytelling, a synchronicity that gives us the Furies, creatures of Renaissance painting, and even chest-bursting aliens." Sounds damn good, right?

Moonlight Sonata: Deafness in Three Movements Directed by Irene Taylor Brodsky

Another documentary that sounds exceptionally unique. The short Sundance description grabbed me right away: "A deeply personal portrait of three lives, and the discoveries that lie beyond loss: a deaf boy growing up, his deaf grandfather growing old, and Beethoven the year he was blindsided by deafness and wrote his iconic sonata." It's a multi-generational portrait of people dealing with deafness, capturing the complexity of silence and hearing. And I am more than intrigued to find out how filmmaker Irene Taylor Brodsky (of Hear and Now previously) examines these themes and weaves these three stories together. Sundance talks it up even more in their description of the film: "Brodsky explores the meaning of deafness, loss, and the power of silence as her son discovers his unique voice and her parents confront a new chapter of their lives," adding that it's "buoyed by a perceptive soundscape and luminous animation." I really want to see this doc.

Midnight Traveler Directed by Hassan Fazili

There's always a remarkable doc discovery, or two, hidden in the Sundance line-up telling an unforgettable story from somewhere else around the world. Read about this film and you'll instantly get a feeling that it's going to be something special. Midnight Traveler is a documentary made by a filmmaker from Afghanistan, Hassan Fazili, who flees his home country and takes us on a perilous journey with his wife and two young daughters as they travel as refugees across Europe searching for a new home. It seems to be a very personal, inside look at the life of a family just trying to surviving on the run from certain death. "Chronicling every step from inside the action", Fazili's camera captures "not only the danger and desperation but also the exuberance and tenderness of this irresistible, loving family." Just look at that shot of them all in the snow above! They seem so loving, wonderful, and authentic. I want to see this just to meet and learn about them.

Apollo 11 Directed by Todd Douglas Miller

I'm a space nerd. I'm a big time fan of NASA. I'm surprised we haven't seen a documentary like this before, but I guess In the Shadow of the Moon is close (focusing on all of the Apollo missions). And I loved Damien Chazelle's First Man, which is also about Apollo 11, so I'm totally ready for this next. The documentary is purported to be an exhilarating cinematic experience, something that demands to be seen on the big screen. NASA has been digging out old footage and photographs and other artifacts from the vaults, putting all of the original footage from the Apollo 11 mission online + uncut audio recordings and more. Produced by CNN Films and Statement Pictures, this film "features never-before-seen, large-format film footage of one of humanity's greatest accomplishments." Oh yes. Can't wait to experience this. Watch the teaser trailer here.

Hail Satan? Directed by Penny Lane

A documentary about the rise of the Satanic Temple religious movement? I'm certainly curious. And it's the latest doc film made by Penny Lane - a quietly talented, quirky, fun filmmaker behind other fantastically weird documentaries like Our Nixon, The Pain of Others, and Nuts! (about a guy who sold people a goat-testicle impotence cure - it premiered at Sundance 2016). I don't know how deep this is going to go, but I am intrigued to find out. Sundance references this eye-brow-raising part of the Satanic Temple's history in their description: "Through their dogged campaign to place a nine-foot, bronze Satanic monument smack dab next to the statue of the Ten Commandments on the Arkansas State Capitol lawn, the leaders of the temple force us to consider the true meaning of the separation of church and state." Sounds like something I have to see for myself, at the very least because no one else is making films about this fascinating topic anyway.

More Documentaries I'm Looking Forward To Seeing: Kenneth Paul Rosenberg's Bedlam, Steven Bognar & Julia Reichert's American Factory, Ben Berman's Amazing Johnathan Documentary, Ljubomir Stefanov & Tamara Kotevska's Honeyland, Petra Costa's Edge of Democracy, Garret Price's Love Antosha, Hepi Mita's Merata: How Mum Decolonised The Screen, Karim Amer & Jehane Noujaim's The Great Hack, Ursula Macfarlane's Untouchable, and Alex Gibney's latest The Inventor: Out for Blood in Silicon Valley.

For all of Alex's Sundance 2019 reviews and updates: Follow @firstshowing

For more Sundance 2019 previews around the web, highlighting early picks and potential breakouts, see: The Film Stage's 20 Most-Anticipated Premieres, and Indiewire's 21 Must-See Films At This Year's Festival. You never know what might be a big hit, and it's vital to have a pulse on the buzz – even before the festival starts. There's plenty of exciting and hopefully superb gems hidden in the 2019 line-up, bring on the films.

You can follow our Sundance 2019 coverage and updates in this category. The festival kicks off January 24th and runs until February 3rd, with lots of films to see every day. Let's jump right in and start watching.

from FirstShowing.net http://bit.ly/2FGN8w1