#i mean a pretentious hipster place

[wolfavens]

briteBeans  │ ★★★★✩

close to uBrite campus, coffee stale, open late tho. GO DRAGOOONS!!! 🐉🐉🐉

[laundrybiscuits]

Eddie’s doing some dumb trick with a couple of wooden spoons, clever hands making them move through the air in improbable ways, and Steve’s about to bite his whisk in half. 

He’d thought for sure that Eddie would be going home the first week; Edward Munson, 29, bartender/musician from Brighton with mismatched tattoos and wild hair, seemed like exactly the kind of pretentious asshole who would flame out early with some ill-advised hipster experimentation. If Steve (28, social worker from Indiana, USA) had been a complete asshole, he’d have said that Eddie didn’t have the fundamentals. That he was all sizzle, no steak. 

It’s a good thing Steve’s not a complete asshole, because Eddie’s been blowing the technicals out of the water so consistently it’s actually pretty fucking embarrassing. His signatures and showstoppers are making a very respectable showing too, except for the time he tried to incorporate some fresh pandan extract and fucked up the liquid ratio, leaving him with a dripping mess that Mary’d declined to even try. 

Afterwards, Steve had seen him leaning against a tree and struggling to light a cigarette. Steve went over for no particular reason, flicking on his lighter and holding it out like a peace offering. Eddie looked at him warily, but bent over the offered flame. 

“Can’t believe I made it through this one,” Eddie said after a moment, white smoke curling out of his mouth.

“Yeah, I feel like that every week.” Steve leaned against the tree next to Eddie. It was a big tree, the kind that’s probably been growing in this field since before England was even England. 

“Nah, but—c’mon, you know what I mean.”

“You had some bad luck with your showstopper. Happens to the best of us, man. Your signature hand pies looked sick as hell.” Steve’s own hand pies had turned out pretty well, so he was feeling generous. It had only been the third week; plenty of time for Steve to snag Star Baker, though even by that point, Steve had been getting the creeping feeling that he was being a little too American about the whole thing. Everyone else seemed to think competitiveness was some kind of deadly sin. It was—actually kind of nice, to get the same kind of nerves he’d always gotten before high school basketball games, but know that he wasn’t really fighting against anyone except himself in the tent.

Anyway, the very next week, Eddie had done some kind of kickass gothic castle with a shiny chocolate dragon and gotten Star Baker for the second time. Steve had clapped him on the back, appropriately manly. Eddie had pulled Steve into a real hug, arms tight around Steve’s shoulders and his whole lean body pressed up close and warm. It had only lasted a moment, and then Eddie had bounded over to Mel and Sue, both of whom he’s been thoroughly charming since the get-go. 

Steve thinks that when this season—or, uh, series—airs, no matter where Eddie places, the entire country is going to be just as charmed. Eddie’s going to get whatever kind of cookbook deal or streaming show he wants. Sponsors will take one look at that handsome face and charismatic grin, and a whole world of possibilities is going to open up for Eddie. 

Steve’s not in it for any of that, of course. He’s here kind of by accident, because Robin pushed him to apply, and it’s a goddamn miracle he’s been holding his own. Hell, it’s a miracle he’s in this country at all. When Robin had started looking at the Cambridge MPhil program in linguistics, she’d said wouldn’t it be great if and he’d snorted, yeah right, like I could ever get whatever job I’d need to move to another freaking country, but then—well. Things had happened the way they’d happened, and now Robin’s almost finished with her degree and Steve is taking time off from the London charity he works at in order to be on Bake Off. 

He’s told all this to the cameras, plus the stuff about how baking started as a way for him to connect with the kids he used to babysit in Indiana, blah blah blah. He thinks it’s probably too boring for them to air, but he gets that they have to try to get a story anyway. 

Eddie Munson, on the other hand, is probably going to be featured in all the series promos. Steve is rabidly curious about what Eddie’s story is, but he hasn’t worked up the nerve to just ask. It should be the easiest thing in the world. They’ve got kind of a camaraderie going, the two of them; a bit of a bromance, as Mel’s put it more than once. 

It’s true they get along pretty well, and the cameras have been picking up on it: on the way Eddie’ll wander over to Steve’s bench like a stray cat whenever they get some downtime, how they wind up horsing around sometimes, working off leftover adrenaline from the frantic rush of caramelization or whatever. There’s the time Eddie had hopped up on a stool to deliver some kind of speech from Macbeth, of all things, and overbalanced right onto Steve, who had barely managed to keep them both from careening into a stand mixer. Sue had patted Eddie on the shoulder and said, “Well, boys, that’ll be going in the episode for sure.”

They both get along with the other contestants just fine, of course, but they’re two guys of about the same age with no wife and kids waiting at home. It’s only natural that they’re gravitating together, becoming something like friends, Steve figures. It’s pretty great that he’s getting at least one real friend out of this whole thing.

It would be even greater if Steve could stop thinking about Eddie’s hands in decidedly non-friendly ways. With all the paperwork he’s signed, he can’t even complain to Robin about how Eddie looks with his sleeves pushed up to show off the tattoos on his forearms, kneading dough and grunting a little under his breath with effort. Steve had almost forgotten to pre-heat his oven that day. 

Two benches away, Eddie fumbles the spoons he’s been juggling with a clatter, and he bursts out laughing, glancing over at Steve like Steve’s in on the joke. Steve grins back, heart twanging painfully in his chest, and thinks: well, fuck. Guess this is happening.

[scoobysnakz]

heyy girl i think if u haven’t what abt u write a dbf miguel x reader ik i see so many but theyre so gd to read they get me so invested every time🤷🏽‍♀️

summary: you’ve just come home from college for christmas but there’s a stranger in your bedroom

a/n: dbf as in dads best friend or dad boy friend? 😭 i’d do either but for this i’ll do dads best friend bc… yh. also tysm for the request it means sm 😚😚😚 also I guess this is a fic now? Bc I kinda hate one shots bci can never cut down on lore and stuff.

❤️

You hadn’t realised how easily college had managed to seep its way into every aspect of your life, pulling you away from both your family and social life, until you came home for Christmas.

Everyone looks so different, your mum is more colourful and chirpy, your father is healthier and your brother is surprisingly mature. But what takes you most by surprise is the lack of silence that has taken them by storm. When you had come home for the summer most of your stay had been filled with an uncomfortable but unfortunately familiar silence following you around but now, you can’t shut them up.

The entirety of the drive home from the train station is full of chatter, and for once they include you. They seem so genuinely invested about you that you don't even question the randomness of their questions, ranging from the journey home and the local shops that surround your campus.

“I heard that there's one of those pretentious, hipster coffee places nearby,” your dad claims from the driver's seat, not bothering to look around at you.

“Vegan?” you offer dryly, unsure of it he knows you work there or not.

“That's it!” he clicks proudly, resulting in both you and your brother sharing a sigh.

Part of you hopes that it’s because of you; that maybe they realised how much they loved you while you were gone and now feel overjoyed at your return. There’s a feeling of doubt floating around in your mind, telling you that this is just a random occurrence, but you push it to the side, wanting to focus on the positive and unrealistic.

***

Your brother helps you lug your suitcase into the house claiming, ‘It’s the least I can do’ which is surreal coming from someone who hasn’t written to you the entirety of your time away. You hand him your antler clifton all the same, glad you didn't have to carry it across the drive as well as up the stairs.

The warmth from the house welcomes you in, the softness of the heated air a stark difference from the harsh bitterness from outside. The sweet smell of cinnamon and gingerbread candles lures you in so soothingly that you don't even notice the extra pair of shoes neatly paired together with the rest by the front door.

“I'll leave it here,” your brother mutters before sliding across the floorboards towards the living room on the heels of his feet- not as mature as you presumed. You smile half-heartedly with a small nod, jealous of how easily he can dismiss himself.

And suddenly you’re alone again, left to your own devices as your parents go start dinner and your brother now yelling into his mic from the living room. It hurts slightly, moments ago they were all over you, so invested in you and your life that you forgot what they're truly like. It's the way it always been and you're a fool for thinking otherwise.

You scold yourself for being so naive as to believe that they'd changed, that they weren't as self-absorbed as they used to be, before pulling yourself away from your sea of negative thoughts.

You stare at your suitcase, bright white light shining on it from the lamp hanging above your head, and decide to leave it there, too tired to carry it upstairs to your room.

The steps creak under your weight as you slouch up the stairs, one hand idly dragging across the chipped bannister. You can't count how many times your dad’s tried to repaint it, how much money he's spent on overpriced glosses and varnishes, how many hours he's spent sanding the thing down.

As you cross the landing, thick carpet dampening the sound of your steps, you the bathroom door left ajar and the soft heat emanating from it. Which is… weird because both your parents and your brother are downstairs. But you shrug it off, too fed up to care, and drag yourself over to your bedroom, head drooping downwards with fatigue.

Casually, you push your door open, expecting the room to be empty and your bed freshly made as it often is when you come home for the holidays. Except it isn't.

Soft jazz music hums throughout the room, playing from a speaker you can't quite place, and the smell of an intoxicatingly strong aftershave clings to the air. Your walls are still decorated with the wallpaper you had when you left but it's covered in various posters. Some are boring and presumably scientific based on the array of symbols, whereas others are insanely niche but you don't really put too much effort into trying to understand them- you're too distracted by the man standing in the middle of your room, half naked and dripping with water.

He's tall, intimidatingly so, but the soft dimples that form in his cheeks as he smiles down at you soothe your nerves- slightly.

“Hey,” he grins down at you, head now cocked to the side and pats his ear causing water droplets to drip onto your carpeted floor.

You blink at him, completely dumbstruck and unsure of what to do. “What the fuck?” you breathe shakily, palms clamming up as your brain desperately flickers between arousal and fear.

The man’s brow furrows at your anxious tone and his smile falters slightly. “I think I should be the one cursing here,” he jests, tone annoyingly light, “you’ve just walked into my room without knocking or anything.”

“You're room?” you scoff, arms folding across your chest. “You're the stranger here, not me.”

He grins at your attitude, those dimples presenting themselves again. “I’m offended, has it been that long since you've last seen me?” he questions, large hand splayed across his chest feigning offence.

You pause for a moment and let your gaze scan him for a moment. He looks familiar, dark slicked back hair and mahogany eyes that are simultaneously scrutinizing and sympathetic.

“A la mierda, querida, have you really forgotten me?” he teases.

And then it clicks. You feel so embarrassed now, for not recognising him. Miguel, your dad’s best friend who you haven't seen for years, is finally visiting again.

He does look different now, though. He's still tall and his face is as chiselled as ever, though there are creases in his skin from when he's smiled too often or squinted too hard at the sun, but he's bulked up a considerable amount. His biceps look bigger than your thighs, tensing and relaxing with every slight movement and shining with the shower water in the yellow light of the evening sun. In fact, his entire body is covered in muscles, and what you can see of his lower half is toned, covered in dark tufts of hair, yes, but the curvature of each muscle is still visible.

He clears his throat and you realise that you’ve been staring longer than intended, shame burning hot on your neck.

“Sorry,” you mutter, “about not recognising you.”

He shrugs off your apology, which irks you slightly but you push past it, and smile once again. “I look different, old age is catching up on me.”

That's definitely what's different.

> next

[oh-allie]

shakespeare and swooning

alhaitham x g/n reader

synopsis; you read one shakespeare play and now you want to impress your "buddy" alhaitham with your newfound knowledge !! what could go wrong?

fluff, g/n reader, TOTAL CRACKFIC, OOC alhaitham, SWEARING, kind of a modern au ???? i mention "ringing tighnari" but that could just be imagined as using the akasha terminal !!!! didnt write this with a modern au in mind

warning ‼️ PLEASE dont expect this to be accurate, if youre a big classic literature fan then dont attack me for not being a NERD ☹️ just imagine a poser using their fancy words (because they think its cool)

you know how libraries are supposed to be a place of study and tranquility? no the fuck you don't, or at least you don't care, because running through the house of daena with shakespeares, "romeo and juliet," in your hands is NOT very tranquil.

multiple poor akademiya students look at you, PISSED OFF because your shoes are going clu-clonk on the marble floors, which wouldn't be an issue if you weren't scurrying through the library.

is that kaveh ?? he's giving you the same look he gives alhaitham every day ..

... but this is IMPORTANT !! you're on a MISSION right now !! you just finished reading the first act of "romeo and juliet," and you're convinced your brain has expanded tenfold in size.

you're now rushing to your good pal haitham to share your knowledge! how kind and gracious!

you're stopped before his house, you've known him for long enough and gotten close enough for him to let you come in whenever. you know kaveh isn't home, and haitham would never purposefully work overtime, so you're certain you can get his attention and show off in peace.

why are you so adamant about showing off to alhaitham? is it REALLY showing off, or are you trying to, heehee, impress him?? its too late to be flustered at this thought because you already unlocked the door with the spare key kaveh leaves behind one of haithams ugly ass decorative plants and you've taken off your shoes and oh god hes right there and the sunlight from the door is lighting up his face in that way that only happens to him and hes looking at you with a suprised, slightly annoyed, but incredibly fond look and oh no what was your plan again?

"greetings, alhaitham! ☝️🤓" you say, finding a surge of confidence remembering the story you read.

"... hey. what are you doing here?" his response is quick but before you respond he continues, "did you just say greetings?"

"indubidibdibdly! hath you be surprised?" you pretentious hipster. you think youre SO cool, but unfortunately your little crush doesn't seem very impressed either.

"okay, what are you doing? you're being weird." he's not even looking at you, and he's back in his chair before you can rush over and sit on the couch. "is something wrong? should i get tighnari to give you a checkup?"

you'd be touched by the care of the suggestion if he wasn't so cheeky in his tone.

"wha, what, no?! no what the hell- stop ringing tighnari."

"are thou o'er wrought with admiration?" you grin, somehow still under the impression that you sound cool.

he gives an eyebrow raise to that. not bothering to mark his place in his book, he stands up.

"i lie testy in why you act so unpregnant, my dear."

"what"

HUH ? what did bro just say ? testy ???? unpregnant ?? MY DEAR ??? backtrack again, UN-WHAT ??

"be still my beating heart, thou hast taken mine with absolute cunning." is he making fun of you i genuinely can't tell ... its like hes speaking in moon runes right now.

"haitham, heheh, WHAT are you DOING ??" you can't help but laugh at his funny little words, magic man. even if you're clueless to what he just said to you.

"whatever doth thou mean?" he's totally making fun of you !! after ALL your effort to impress him too?

"well, usually i do all the ranting and you sit pretty and listen, so it's weird that you're talking so much, especially like THAT?" fym sit pretty ....

"when words are scarce they are seldom spent in vain." that sounds familiar, but you can't think about it longer before he continues, "shall i compare thee to a summers day?"

"ALRIGHT, i recognize that one, dummy." you laugh, "were you really not impressed by me?" you whisper, the rush of embarrassment you shouldve felt in that library is finally catching up with you.

he stares at you for a second. you just wish you could find out what hes thinking up there, if you could even understand it.

and then he lets you into his mind, with a simple "i love you." as if alhaitham, renowned scribe of the akademiya, top student, couldn't find the words to describe how he felt for you.

or maybe that was what he felt for you. he loved you.

"... you called me unpregnant."

a/n; i read romeo and juliet like... 3 years ago.... so.. uam... 😇😇 totally accurate! hope this crackfic style of writing isnt too niche so this doesnt flop because EMBARRASSING....... do people even like al haitham anymore like guys lets go back to the good old days before the FRENCH came in..... (this is just me projecting cause i havent played genshin in a while and i still lovelove sumeru)

[netflixonyourcouch]

So much has been made of the Halsey response

Thank you Halsey, first and foremost, for an amazing album. I don't want that point to get lost by discussing what is admittedly the NOISE surrounding this album.

The main culprits: Pitchfork and Fantano. The long and short of it, for those who are unaware: both Pitchfork and Fantano cruelly and unfairly attacked Halsey's intentions, accusing her of essentially milking their illness for the album and exhibiting "main character syndrome" or some shit. There is no way around it, these were personal attacks, and designed to shock and make a statement against her instead of engage with the project in good faith.

So many people have come out on both sides to either support Halsey or defend Pitchfork/Fantano's right to criticism.

Let me tell you something. You white-washed, hipster ass, elitist ass motherfuckers who think indie music is so superior to pop music (and liking Charli's BRAT doesn't count, you bandwagon bitches) need to get a life. All of you. You're NOT the smartest in the room, you're not smarter than Halsey fans, you're not more cultured, more correct, or even more logical. You pride yourselves on that because you've already made up your mind about pop music and refuse to bend, and I'm here to tear down that smug sense of superiority.

You fucking chumps have the gall to say, "What? People aren't allowed to criticize music anymore" Blah blah blah. Stop going to one end of the extreme every fucking time someone wants to put your bullshit "criticism" in its place. You all sound like fucking Republicans lmfao, ignorant as fuck. Republicans cry about "free speech being cancelled" because they can't say racist shit anymore. Yall cry about criticism being "dead" because you can't openly denigrate pop stars anymore.

You can't say ignorant, close-minded, sexist, rockist bullshit and act like nobody is allowed to call it out. Genuine criticism ISN'T THE ISSUE. Petty, personal and short-sighted attacks on Halsey's character IS THE ISSUE. Until you stop at the stop sign and ACKNOWLEDGE THIS FACT, I don't wanna hear anything else about defending the "right to criticize." Present criticism in good faith and then we'll talk.

I can talk about this shit BECAUSE I'VE BEEN THERE. I used to run in the same little cliques as yall. I'm so glad I'm no longer like you fucking pricks anymore because you are all insufferable people. I feel frankly embarrassed that I was ever that pretentious and condescending and I pray that all of you wake up and understand the error of your ways. THERE IS STILL TIME, the irony is that your refusal to keep an open mind about pop music means that you're NOT the so-called "music experts" that you think you are. If you were true music experts you'd be experts about ALL MUSIC not just white people with guitars. Again, CHARLI DOESN'T COUNT. CARLY RAE JEPSEN DOESN'T COUNT, YOU SOUND LIKE THE WHITE PEOPLE THAT SAY THAT SAY THEY CAN'T BE RACIST BECAUSE THEY HAVE 2 BLACK FRIENDS. It's the joke about being US sports teams calling themselves "World Champions" when they are only playing in an American league. You're not an expert on "music" while simultaneously ACTIVELY IGNORING A BIG CHUNK OF MUSIC.

You're also attempting to outsmart all the backlash by saying "Just because Halsey talks about their sickness doesn't make it a great album!!!" Let me address that claim and then I'm done with your faux-intellectual fucks, who again I'd like to remind, are not as smart as yall think. Some of you cobbled a few more brain cells together, I'll give you that, and think that this is the ultimate "gotcha" but it's not. Let's start with the elephant in the room: 1. Many of you who are saying all this shit against Halsey HAVEN'T EVEN HEARD THE ALBUM YET. So until you listen to it, I'm not even entertaining any of your fucking arguments because it's coming from a place of literal ignorance. You don't even know what the album sounds like!! 2. If you DID listen to it, it's a strong chance you didn't digest it. NO I'm not saying it's this ultra challenging piece of work that's difficult to understand, I'm instead arguing you skimmed it, didn't listen closely enough or went in with a strong bias to where you're not even in the position to hear its greatness.

Yes, it's a technically right statement that simply talking about a deep or emotional topic doesn't automatically make a work of art great. The reason why that doesn't apply here is that she DID make a great album. I like her last album more but there's no denying that this is right behind it, and in some parts even better. Not every song is my favorite, but there's no way around it, there are some PHENOMENAL songs on here: I Believe in Magic, The Arsonist, The End, Dog Years, Ego, Darwinism, and Lonely is the Muse are all better than your standard indie singer-songwriter stuff.

Finally, I've seen this over and over again: People like to overapply the rules to artists they don't like. I've seen it with Taylor too, who I admittedly don't like, but people tend to be super uncharitable toward her too. You'd NEVER disparage Sufjan for talking about his struggles with Guillain-Barre or try to say, "Just because he talks about Guillain-Barre doesn't make it a great album!" It simply wouldn't happen. So stop this rules-for-thee-but-not-for-me hypocrisy bullshit and try to get a fucking clue, please.

In short. I won't sit silently anymore as people in the indie community try to self-assure themselves that Halsey fans are the crazy ones for calling out cheap, personal attacks under the guise of "criticism." Yes, I'm sure you all are assuring yourselves that "stan twitter" is the problem and "people can't criticize music anymore" but I need all of you to wake up and get a clue, THERE IS STILL TIME, if you love music try actually opening your mind for a change and LOVE MUSIC instead of parading around your indie music bias as if it's the only correct take there can be. Try to get some more pop music in your diet before you criticize pop music. I wouldn't expect someone who likes two hip-hop artists to give good constructive criticism on hip-hop any more than I'd be able to give good constructive criticism on a jazz album just because I like Thundercat and Flying Lotus.

This was long-winded and aggressive but I'm sorry, I'm tired of pretending it's okay that hipster motherfuckers do this shit. I can't do it anymore.

[kimbapisnotsushi]

Hello, here to help you through the midterms! I would like to hear about Tsukki if you haven't shared hcs for him a thousand times already and/or Fukunaga :)

my babies!!! i'd be more than happy to, let's get it :))

tsukishima:

avid romance defender. he may be kind of mean when it comes to rejecting confessions and girls and doesn't totally get why he's so popular for it but as a bookworm he's very aware of the issues that the genre in literature (and across other mediums as well) faces and WILL have a whole rant locked and loaded if you ask him

thinks strawberry shortcake needs to stay in its purest form to be any good and absolutely will not accept any variations like "white chocolate strawberry shortcake" or "raspberry strawberry shortcake" or anything that alters plain ol' strawberry shortcake

nerdy enough that he has a map tacked up in his room with pins in all the places he wants to visit someday

does not know how to use emojis or kaomojis or even just the simple :) at all and if anyone gets a message from him with one they can safely assume his phone was stolen by yamaguchi, hinata, noya, or suga

everyone is really surprised when they find out that he and lev actually text quite a lot and tsukki is like "look if i don't help him with hw he is NOT going to pass first year"

during tokyo training camp he tries to sneak into the high school's library LMAAAAO

has the most pretentious-ass music taste you will ever find but DOES like a handful of mainstream pop songs

(personally i think he's a yorushika fan but that's just me)

likes getting hw done at cute coffeeshops/cafes especially when his room feels really overwhelming

fukunaga:

once told tora very seriously that he knew a great trick for freaking people out and then proceeded to whip out a mandarin from seemingly nowhere and bit into the whole thing like an apple and tora's resulting reaction was what made fukunaga think about getting into comedy

he did it to lev too except he used a banana and lev's been scared of him ever since

knows, like, every single classic-52-deck card game in existence for some reason

do NOT play poker with him he has an excellent resting face you WILL lose

also really good at sleight-of-hand and simple magic tricks

probably has the most knowledge/experience in non-japanese cuisines let's be real

also has a bucket hat collection that ranges from "cool and stylish" to "walking shitpost"

he's got one with cat ears attached to the top that he's very fond of

uses the team as trial-and-error for his recipes and once accidentally gave them all food poisoning

(nobody blamed him ofc but he felt really bad and made them all cupcakes after)

likes going to hipster artsy events like open mic nights at coffee shops and bookstores and free gallery viewings and band battles and whatever

has to resist the urge to pat inuoka's and lev's heads like a dog sometimes

[waywardstarfishkid]

Outragiously long and stupid rant incoming!

I like never make posts on here but I wanted to scream into the void about heartbreak high. Since s1 I've seen like really strange takes and half the time I'm like is it because people don't know how Australian school is different or is it a lack of critical thinking.

Like in s1 I only saw people either hating or loving spider and don't get me wrong either of those is valid but the way people were explaining it was strange to me.

For me I didn't like spider but not because he was some unrepeatable arsehole I actually think he was a great representation of a lot of Australian guys I knew growing up. Like he says dumb shit but then when things are serious he does the right thing like he helped malakai with the cop (then said fucking stupid things after) and he helped amerie at the festival, he wanted to help harper and let her in even though it would mean he and American would have to stop hooking up.

In comparison I swore people liking dusty who in my eyes was way worse than spider. He acted all woke like he said the right things and then did shitty things like shaming harper and deciding to frame jojo.

Like theyrr both shit but I would trust spider with my drink over but maybe not dusty.

Then ant I understand if you like ant and spider together but I think people maybe don't understand how touchy guys are with each other in Australia. Like gay straight bi whatever guy friends hang off each other and I think it's actually healthy to show that. I also saw someone complaining about spider and ant doing gay shit but only as a joke but I never saw that like I don't think any of it was a joke it just wasn't gay. Like spider calling him pet names them cuddling and stuff is just affection which is actually great especially for men who often don't know how to have affection that's not sexual.

Also can we agree that ant just doesn't care about the gender he's hooking up with like I don't think he's bi I think he's just into who he's into (is that pansexual? Sorry).

I was a bit disappointed with all the bisexual characters ending up in straight relationships but that's mostly because I really wanted an ant malakai and I liked Rowan Malaysia before it went to shit. But at the same time I dont like how people critiquing it often feels like Bi erasure. Like I'm a bi woman whos first gay relationship ended because my gf (lesbian) cheated on me with a lesbian because she constantly thought I was cheating on her with my guy friends and for a long time I just dated guys because I didnt know many bi women and lesbian girls kept being horrified that I would go near a dick (not all of them my ex was very understanding and actually encouraged me to embrace my sexualising when I was just a baby bi) but my point is I totally understand how having a straight relationship when bi can actually be more understanding (at least in mine and my friends experiences) and it's totally valid even though the relationship is straight.

Also people angry about not as much quinni (I agree more quinni she and cash are my loves) I'm actually happy they took a back-seat with her on the relationship front like her and Sasha were a big deal/quinnis first relationship and I think it wouldve really messed quinni up with how it ended. I also love that they're not just centring her storyline around being the gay girl you know like she I a multifaceted queen.

Also for the Sasha redemption, I get why people are calling for it but unlike spider and dusty like Sasha didn't really do anything wrong (except for how she treated quinni but they talked at the end of s1 and seem to be moving to a place of good friendahip) shes mostly just annoying and pretentious like the other idiots actually fuvked up. I don't really want a Sasha redemption I just want to see more of her character make her a bit less of a two dimensional hipster, which I honestly think they only didn't fo because they had a lot of characters to juggled Sasha had to take a back-seat so Missy could shine (and I love Missy so I'll allow it also her and malakais friendship means everything to me the indigenous representation that shows not just the aspects of country and family but also shows them as fully formed characters I LOVE)

Sorry for the obscenely long rant this is just all my thoughts from s1 and s2 so ignore it by all means and also if you disagree that's fine and you are probably right lol.

[missielynne]

I didn't send the anon about Jay and Sam being desperate social climbers but realized when I read it that I totally agree with it and it's part of why I connected with Jay and Sam much more in S1 than in S2 and S3. It would be less annoying if just one of them was a 30s-omething pitifully intent on impressing "cool" kids while the other offered snarky perspective, but the fact that Jay and Sam are BOTH so pathetically desperate for social clout and to be accepted is kind of pathetic imo. I also feel like they're regressing? Like Jay was always just excited to connect with anyone, but it's only more recently that he wants those people to be "cool" or whatever and would even join a cult, and Sam did always want approval but she also used to be depicted as someone who ultimately embraced her true dorky self rather than trying so very very very hard to fit in with people who clearly don't even like her much. It's hard to even imagine this version of Jay and Sam leaving NYC and making the bold move to Woodstone in the first place. I agree with you that it was fun to watch these two "hipsters" freak out (I'm in NY and promise that 99% of people are NOT like these pretentious hipster influencer types the writers give us!!!) but I hope the show either gives Jay and Sam a few real friends (not the 'popular' kids, just normal people lol) or has them accept their social situation for what it is rather than making them this pathetic. Maybe it's because I'm an introverted geek who can't relate lol.

Right! I am more in the "find Sam and Jay friends who are more like them who live nearby" (like Mark) camp. They really need it bad. I mean if they drag in the occasional rich hipster to get business, that's fine but give these poor people some normal friends for crying out loud. (Maybe even some goth-ish friends or friends who are into ghosts. that would be cool.)

I guess part of it is that they're still struggling to get the business off the ground and that's why they feel they have to kiss up to the weird hipsters who don't like them (along with the fact that there seem to be no regular people like them anywhere nearby). Maybe once they business really going they won't be so desperate for friends or attention and can hold out for people who like them for them.

It's funny cause in the BBC version, Mike and Alison are super introverted and sure we see a couple episodes with their friends but they don't need people coming over all the time.

It's like we need a middle ground where yes, Sam and Jay get real genuine friends, but I also think that getting them to be comfortable with just themselves is also really important and I'd like to see that too somehow.

[canenotabeltofunction]

Not to sound like a pretentious hipster but art is not meant to appeal to everyone. Making art purely to appeal to as many people as possible defeats the purpose of creating in the first place. And so much of this has to do with consumerism and a lack of connection to other people.

Because of consumerism art has become something that needs to be as easy to consume by as many people as possible. Books are often heavily filled with tropes and caricatures of characters (ie: enemies to lovers, brooding male lead, sunshine female lead, etc). Songs and poems can’t have personal touches to them- it has to be as vague as possible so as many people can want to hear it. People are forced to make what the masses want rather than things that portray some kind of message. The intention behind the art becomes meaningless and overshadowed by the need for it to be profitable. And most of this is not the fault of the artist but more so in the need to survive in a capitalist hellscape.

The real reason for creating art gets lost. And with it so many people seem to have lost their ability to consume art properly. If it hasn’t been watered down or requires us to think about what it means to us or it doesn’t immediately make us happy then it’s labeled as “bad”.

I would rather listen to a song about a man singing about the ginger with a butterfly tattoo that broke his heart in college than someone sing about some outline of a girl and saying the things that they think will make me relate the most. Because one of those has real pain, real pain from a real person. Just because I was not heartbroken by a ginger woman with a butterfly tattoo I have been heartbroken and I am going to connect more deeply to this guys pain because it’s REAL it comes from a REAL place.

Unfortunately I feel like at least with what I see online, many people have forgotten how to do that. We want to consume it as quickly and mindlessly as possible- we don’t WANT to think about what something means.

And people forget that art isn’t always supposed to make you feel good. Sometimes it’s supposed to disturb you, sometimes it’s supposed to piss you off. Obviously there are times that I want to just watch a fun little movie and not think about the deeper meaning. But just because a movie disturbed me or because I don’t agree with the message of something doesn’t mean it was bad.

Even creating art for the purpose of making things people will like has some depth when you are doing it out of love and the desire to spread happiness or comfort or to make people smile. But often that even gets overshadowed by the need to make things as quickly as possible and removes that emotional aspect.

But overall this is your reminder that your art is meant to be personal. Because making art that is genuine may not connect to as many people but for the people it does it will be in a deeper way.

[chappell-roans]

did u see this whole millie bobby brown disclosure? Her saying that she doesn’t watch movies because she thinks it’s too long and she can’t just sit and watch. and this is sadly typical behavior from nepo babies and those kids that were essentially made to be actors by their parents. they don’t feel real love for the craft but get so many opportunities than other actors that study cinema and are very knowledgeable barely get.

but i think only actors that love cinema are able to transcend and work for a long time. a lot of people were calling Austin Butler pretentious but I find his knowledge of cinema admirable. chalamet also got called pretentious once for referencing a lot of movies but I find that normal because studying cinema as an actor should be your job? it’s part of the preparation? A look at the career both of them have… it’s easy to know when an actors loves the craft by how they speak, Florence’s hot wings interview was very insightful and you can tell she pays attention to every element of filmmaking.

For instance, I remember watching an interview w Tom Holland and I find him a charming guy but I really dislike how he once joked and made fun of a very valid question about studying process for a role - it doesn’t seem that he takes the craft that seriously and I find the instances of where he didn’t know who certain directors were and when he said Scorsese couldn’t direct a Marvel film so crazy considering how he has been the pioneer of so many “blockbuster” in its time, and his lack of cinema knowledge shows in the quality of his choices for roles.

I feel a lot of actors don’t realize that by saying things like they they get a lot of doors slammed in their face.

I'm late replying again sorry but all of this, yes. I tried not thinking about it too much but it definitely irks me. And I think there are a loooot of people of tbh all ages that feel this way. But it does particularly suck for someone making movies to feel this way? (I did see some conversation on twitter between people who actually work on film sets and they said this is common, particularly among like crew members like gaffers, lighting, etc etc.)

YES. This is why when "pretentious" discourse goes around because like Jacob Elordi talks about Marlon Brando (not his method acting, but just his acting) or old movies, people make fun of him and say he's just a try-hard hipster. But maybe... he loves acting and wants to improve his craft? Like, I agree. It's something that should come from a place of love and wanting to get better. We can't all be Hugh Grant and annoyed at the world all the time lmao. And like you said, same with Austin, Timothee, hell, remember the Jeremy Strong "dramaturgical" discourse that people freaked out about for a week because he used... a common theater word? Lmfao.

It's like, when letterboxd does their asking an actor or director their four favorites, there's always people in the comments saying they don't believe that an old French movie or hell even a 70s movie (that isn't The Godfather or Star Wars, bc apparently Jaws is pretentious?? LMAO), could be someone's fav and they're lying to look good. But if someone lists a bunch of animated Disney children's movies, La La Land, and Scott Pilgrim then they must be telling the truth. Maybe they both are? But god it's so frustrating to think that having taste beyond the basics is pretentious. Like, people call CHRISTOPHER NOLAN MOVIES PRETENTIOUS. Just because something is mildly to extremely clever or smart doesn't mean it's pretentious :)

Rant over lmao.

I need to watch Florence on Hot Ones still but I loved seeing bits of her on the press tour for Oppenheimer and I saw a clip of her and Zendaya talking about the craft of cinematography (linked) and how like Flo told her story about the camera breaking on Oppenheimer, and Z talked about like how she loves sitting in the tent w the Dune cinematographer and learning how everything works. Like, they love filmmaking!!! And I love that! This is how actors become better, and can produce, and even direct successfully. (Z I think definitely will. She'd had plans to direct at least one Euphoria ep but of course shitshow that it is, it hasn't happened yet.)

But yeah agreed about Tom Holland it's all soooo. Idk. You can very much tell when someone really loved movies and the process of how they are made, or not. And that's the truth whether someone's favorite movie is Godzilla v. Kong or Breathless. But yes!!! I truly don't understand why they say things like that, like... unless you want a door closed, don't close it for no reason! Lmao. Ayo Edebiri has talked about this recently.

I really don't get that w Scorsese of all people too like... all his movies are fucking popcorn movies. It's all cinema but who the hell is thinking Goodfellas is boring? Or The Aviator? Hell, I just watched Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore. It has a batshit opening and is suuuch a fast-paced movie for what it is like, about a woman coming to terms w loss and making it on her own w her annoying kid (affectionate) and domestic violence I just ?? I don't get it myself! And pretending Scorsese actually has a war against Marvel is stupid as fuck. I wish he did! Someone should.

[maplesunflowers]

30, 45, 10

BroTP? Headcanons?

I always thought Alfred and Feliciano would make an AMAZING BroTP. I just see them creating so much chaos and just being general menaces to society.

Most iconic canon line?

Am I Catholic or Protestant? God I don't know!

is the first to come to mind.

How long have you been in the fandom? What's your lore?

Hahahaha, strap in folks! This is gonna be a doozy!

Also gonna put this under "Read More".

Trigger Warnings for talk of bad mental health.

Okay so, I'm an OG Hetalia fan. I got into Hetalia in 2012 after my household got Netflix. Around that time I was going through a REALLY bad depressive state due to a super bad heartbreak (won't go into details, but don't fall for pretentious ass hipsters kids) and Hetalia managed to be the thing that got me out of my depression because it was the only thing that was able to make me laugh. (Which is why Hetalia is my # 1 piece of comfort media BTW)

In 2013 I tried making an ask blog but it didn't take off and unfortunately it caused my mental health to get really bad. because my friend at the time had made an ask blog too that managed to take off and as a result they started to kinda push me to the side. I would tell them how I felt them push me away and they'd be like "Oh sorry" but it didn't feel like they made any effort to fix it. (Plus I was the reason they got into Hetalia in the first place so that made me even saltier). I ended up abandoning my ask blog and pulling away from the fandom after my mental health took a nosedive.

I've always been lurking around in the Hetalia fandom, again it's my Number One comfort media, it means SO much to me. It wasn't until the Pandemic that I really dove back into it. I decided it had been long enough and that I wanted to officially rejoin the fandom. I originally made this blog as a side blog on my OG account but anxiety made me delete it because I was afraid of people I knew knowing about my Hetalia blog. So I just ended up making a whole new account.

[courtneykistheway]

Start of a new blog...

I've decided to put all of my writing happenings here, on tumblr.

A.) It is free. I know I 'should' be charging people for my oh-so precious thoughts and ramblings. It's what's proper and keeps the creative economy going, in the sphere of the internet. But I don't want to. Honestly, I hate charging for anything and wish we could live without the need for money, so here we are. (I want to be in a place eventually where I can charge money for my full-length novels. I tried a poetry book once, didn't go well. Anyways, not that I want to charge, but I'm not very good at working normal jobs due to my stupid, creative, mentally-something brain. Books would be ideal, but I mean. I do think I have the right to be mad about it. I should just be able to give people my books without worrying if I can feed myself from it, ya know? But yeah. Again, here we are, at an emotional limbo that's tied to finances, yet again.)

B.) I post too many things on other platforms in regards to my writing that doesn't make sense for the platform, the posts bomb, then I beat myself up for not being able to 'perform' properly.

C.) There's less people. Tumblr has always felt like a pink bubble to me. I can say what I mean, using as many words as necessary to achieve my intention.

D.) I really just want to share snippets of my writing. I can't do that other places in a social-media aspect.

E.) I can't see views on here, and because of the way I've used this app for the past decade, I don't care. I don't expect to get likes on literally anything I post here, and due to the personal nature, I don't really want to.

F.) I'm a pretentious hipster and only want the people that took the time to come to my thought box to see my real thoughts. It is what it is, I know this about myself at this point. Oh. Well.

[pining-mx-diva-dumpster]

Isolationist

Sometimes I think I might’ve been too smart for my classes because in my intro to religion’s class, I decided to talk about Herman Hesse’s Siddhartha. Everyone looks at me with a blank stare and I’m like damn this is just like highschool again. I’m a pretentious artsy little hipster, which means I watch shit like Paprika and say I’m cultured.

I’ve always been super above grade level when it came to reading but I never really wanted to apply myself because that would’ve just spelt more isolation. I wanted to fit in like all insecure high schoolers. So I never really wanted to tell people that I listened to history podcasts or watched video essays breaking down concepts like liminal spaces in horror.

I isolate myself from my peers not because I don’t want friends but because I don’t know how to keep them around if they don’t respond to me or always place me on a last priority. When I have friends I backtrack a lot, I make sure they feel prioritized and safe with me cause I’ve never really had this with the people I hung out with from high school. I think they just saw me as a sort of pet. Which is why I protect myself with books and studying. If I can just be surrounded by words maybe it’ll be enough to sate my desire for companionship.

[unhingedwomandiaries]

Look, I've been dying to check out one of these absolute bin-fire mystery kilo clothing sales for ages. You know the type - where they chuck random textile roadkill into these massive plastic barrels and charge you basically bugger-all to dig through it like some feral raccoon with a clothing addiction. When one of these fashion apocalypses finally landed in my postcode, I was SO IN. Three quid for an early bird ticket? That's basically paying to breathe at this point.

I dragged my two partners in crime along because A) misery loves company, and B) splitting train fare means more money for potential trash-treasure hunting. We stumbled about town at 10 a.m., looking like we'd been dragged backwards through a charity shop, hitting all the hipster morning spots. Chocolate shop? Check. Dying candy shop? Check. Pretentious artisanal bakery that nobody actually needs? Double-check.

When we rocked up to this clothing carnage, the queue was already longer than my list of teenage grudges. Blokes were strategizing like they were planning some military invasion, all desperate to grab the best Nike tat before scurrying off like frightened woodland creatures. There was even this absolutely mental blonde wandering about, waving a tenner and begging to cut in line like some sort of deranged queue terrorist.

The local press were lurking too - because apparently this was going to be the hard-hitting journalism that would save print media. As if.

When those doors finally opened, it was pure, unadulterated chaos. Body-on-body violence that would make Black Friday look like a sodding tea party. I'm talking grown adults throwing actual hands over a manky dri-fit tank top from some random American baseball team nobody's ever heard of. "Shakopee Sno-Devils, 2001 Finalists!" Mate, I don't give a flying toss about 10-year-olds playing baseball in Minnesota, and neither do you.

While the unwashed masses were beating seven shades out of each other, I made a tactical beeline for the handbag section. The real battlefield of this entire operation. I spotted a Hermès box and nearly wet myself with excitement. But of course, the bag was long gone - snatched by some more aggressive fashion vulture.

My final haul? Two skirts, two shirts, two scarves - all for 43 bloody pence. One scarf was actually a cheeky Gucci number, which is just peak capitalism, innit? Some rich muppet once spent a month's wages on this, and I'm walking away with it for less than the price of a Freddo.

The whole scene was like some weird social experiment. Everyone documenting their "incredible finds" on social media like they'd just discovered the Holy Grail of clothing. We ended up grabbing food at this vegan place with the most ridiculous name - "Bento" my arse. My mate ordered something called "Sexy Mock Legs" which looked like the remnants of a vegetarian crime scene. Just smooth, alien-looking fake meat that no sane person would voluntarily put in their mouth.

We're a weird bloody species, aren't we? Hunter-gatherers turned into sad little haul-uploaders, all chasing the same pathetic delusions. Such is life in this absolutely mental modern world.

[outside-lookingin]

The end of tumblr

Back in 2018, tumblr got caught with their pants down and bums exposed when it made the news, the BIG NEWS one of their blogs posted child porn. All the higher up execs and staff panicked, risk of losing their place on every platform avail, they banned nudity and pornography from this site in an attempt they were ‘doing something’ about it. Tumblr has always been a place where anything goes. Well, ALMOST anything. Despite tumblr’s community guidelines we all agreed to, blogs were breaking rules daily and if you trotted off into the dark side of tumblr, you found hideous things. Scary things. You found things you’ve never seen before or wanted to see. To this day some images have stuck with me. Some images so unbelievably gruesome and disturbing, I wish I could forget. Some blogs that posted certain nonsense were deleted. Or a post was simply removed. Then some blogs weren’t and by some magic twist of fate slipped under the radar basically forever and got away with murder. Then some other blogs were deleted with no warning or no good reason.

Then a light at the end of the tunnel? As of this year, tumblr has reinstated nudity. This unfortunately has not saved their site. The good blogs that left after the great ‘females presenting nipples ban of 2018’ didn’t come back. The posters that post haven’t been posting as much. It’s been too little too late. Oh, now you’re sorry?! Four years later?!! Nice. The blogs that were labeled ‘explicit’ stayed explicit and weren’t given the option to be rebirthed to have a site again. If you’re an explicit blog, you’re dead to tumblr. You don’t even exist.

I’m sorry to say after all that tumblr has done to try to save their site, they are hanging on by a very short thread. In an attempt to regal feelings of old, this site gets goofy, but in the most pretentious way. As a feeling of a stale corn flake that no longer serves it’s purpose. We had the click for frogs thing for no reason which was stupid. Or an old windows 95 desktop blocking half of the damn page. To keep it all hip and cute for the kiddies, now we have a tumblr store selling random, useless and stupid items. What? Nonsense. And as a cherry on the shit sundae, there is now tumblr live. What in the hell is tumblr live? Well, it is nothing more then a bunch of random and i mean RANDOM yo-yo’s who have no idea what tumblr is or who don’t even like tumblr who are streaming for no good reason whatsoever. Oh, so that’s what that is. And every week after you snooze the annoying banner of icons of the most hipster jerks you’ve ever seen in your life, tumblr live turns on again for you and it appears like some horrible thing. So you go back in your settings and have to turn it off again. You have to turn it off every week so you don’t have to look at the most horrible thing you’ve ever seen in your life: Other people. Ewwwwwwwww. What? We don’t want to see other people. We want to see what we like to see. Which is whatever we want why we’re here! Art! Old time hollywood! Movie gifs! Other shit! What the fuck does live streaming nobodys have to do with tumblr! You know how tumblr’s Q&A is basically Q&A with people you’ve never even heard of in your entire life? Same thing except much worse.

Even after all these changes, additions and ‘improvements’, would you believe that child porn blogs still exist on this site? You’re kidding? Nope, I am not. You might be asking yourself, how do you know such things? Well, I happened to have followed the wrong blog which I no longer follow which reblogged garbage. I also became aware of another blog I followed that also posted and reblogged garbage and from there saw who they reblogged garbage from and so forth and so forth. Tumblr cannot possibly handle this. Or can they? How many blogs are on this damn thing anyways? Well, after an extensive google search which was literally 3 seconds, over 500 millions blogs exist on tumblr. But how many REAL blogs is that? 500 million blogs nearing 600 million? This counts blank blogs, spam blogs and blogs that haven’t posted for ten or more years. So now how many blogs does that leave? Would you say 100 million or less actual users?

I still can’t help but feel tho with so much to oversea, there is still a right way and a wrong to handle this. What would be hard about having a special ‘team’ separate from the regular tumblr team to seep out the garbage? SO, you’re just going to keep letting pedophiles post trash?

After me reporting dozens of these blogs and even an e-mail to the CEO, these blogs are being erased one little bit at a time and some not at all? Why would tumblr have time to get rid of trash when they have to worry about designing stupid stickers or cashing in so hipsters can buy 20 checkmarks that mean NOTHING. Tumblr’s priorities are in the wrong place. You need a solid foundation first before you go off bullshitting and fucking around. And to make a functional foundation you need A: Having a functional site. B: Have it run fast. C: Fix your damn bugs. D: Make sure you’re not having a whole host of the wrong blogs. And ‘speaking’ of the wrong blogs, for a site that doesn’t allow porn there sure is a lot of it I come across. Not only porn gifs from random blogs, but full on porn blogs that reblog nothing but porn. Well, imagine that. I remember the welcome back e-mail from CEO Matt Mullenweg, who told us that now we can not think of nipples as a bad thing anymore, but allowing porn on a blog site basically doesn’t work. It SEEMS to be working pretty good for some peeps? Tumblr can’t seem to weed out it’s own troth of minions violating it’s community guidelines. How do you fix this? We don’t need a tumblr filter again. We remember what a disaster that was. Liars. You would appeal a post that had nothing to do with adult content at all and a promise it would be reviewed by a real human, only to receive an e-mail a half a second later informing you your post IS adult content and will not be restored. BOY, those tumblr staff real humans sure are quick, aren’t they? But why regal the things of old. The point is, this site is dying and not as exciting as it used to be.

Some blogs that suffered a cruel fate or having their blog labeled explicit or deleted and started a new blog found they were being targeted on the new blog and still being punished by having their archive wiped out or random posts disappear. What is that about?

Knowing there is a whole community of sick blogs that got tumblr in trouble in the first place and that got us punished means nothing has changed other then a four year gap where nakedidity (it’s a word) meant your ass. The fact that it took as long as it did for word to get out this site has blogs that post illegal crap is incredible it took that long. And now at this point we find that there are still illegal posts that a four year hiatus on tits did NOTHING.

[whimsicallywiddershins]

True. Yeah, there are some rich assholes that get there with private planes. But the majority people there drive. And yeah, they are using generators, but so does everyone else who ever goes camping with a trailer. I know it's stolen land but the land itself is BLM land so all of the public is allowed to be there. (I've actually been camping on the Black Rock Playa in the spring, it's quite pretty and a great place to learn how to drive a clutch lol) And calling them rich for paying for a ticket and getting special equipment? Um, what do you think skiing and snowboarding is? Or surfing? Or ocean fishing? Or even just camping jeez.

Yeah, most Burners are hipsters that call eachother silly names and go do drugs in the desert. They are pretentious and have all of the worst hipster characteristics. But that doesn't mean it's OK to laugh and point at wish them misery. Jeez. These are normal people who save up every year to go to Burning Man, not a bunch of billionaires and millionaires disturbing a mass grave. Cut them some slack.

Burning Man is an art festival where the tickets are $300-$500 for a nine day event.

If you know someone who has been to comic con or disney world or a taylor swift concert for more money for fewer days, be sure to let them know that you consider them to be a member of the one percent and therefore expendable in your quest for total class conscious.