#i love meg and cas and i really couldn't tell you all my thoughts on them simply bc my thoughts

[fanfic-corner]

Lesser Known Destiel Fics pt 3

You guys really liked the last list... so here are some more lesser known Destiel fics! This time, we're doing ones with less than 10k hits :)

You Deserve To Be Loved by sandean_cas (1k)

Castiel senses Dean's longing and meets him on the bridge.

Loving Castiel by dinluke (1.9k)

“How did you find me?” Dean asks. Castiel squints and looks at him like he’s the sun.

“Your, uh, yearning was pretty loud,” he says sheepishly.

Mister Scarecrow Hates Halloween by Carrieosity (3.1k)

Castiel hates Halloween, so being roped into working in costume at a pumpkin patch has him seething in misery. And now, of all things, the object of his unrequited crush is walking toward him, and Cas is praying the costume will hide him just a bit longer.

Boneless Wings by PallasPerilous (4.3k)

For those of you perving along at home, Dean could absolutely provide a list of the hundred or so ways that having a boyfriend with giant fucking actual wings is super hot and/or awesome.

This is not that list.

Grace by july_19th_club (5.1k)

A man dies. What happens next will shock you.

a covenant of salt by museaway (5.1k)

They didn’t put up a tree on Cas’s first Christmas in the bunker.

Enhanced Extraction Techniques by goldenraeofsun (5.7k)

The Empty takes Meg’s shape, Samandriel’s, Duma’s, every one of the thousands of angels Cas killed up in heaven. But in the middle of lecturing Cas in the form of Balthazar, it explodes in a burst of light and sound.

Dean Winchester stands in the aftermath.

New All Over Again by Castielslostwings (5.7k)

Dean and Cas as childhood sweethearts separated as teenagers who have been searching for each other for years without success. Against all odds, they reunite in the middle of Times Square at midnight on New Year’s Eve.

The Cry of Elisha after Elijah by intothesilentland (5.8k)

The kicker is, Dean had been trying to live.

Really live. And not bite out in anger at the fraying of his heart: Cas, gone, Jack, gone—all that was left was him and his brother, and Dean had been trying to live, in spite, in light of that.

In a world like the unsteady first steps of a child, apprehensive arms and hands cradling the air around them, ready for a slip, excited for a step, Dean had been trying to walk forward, too. Though every step had meant every pain.

Upon his death, and arrival in heaven, Dean sets out to find the angel. He has to tell him. Cas has to know.

(un)conventional by imogenbynight (6.1k)

Spec Lit Con--Speckly Con, to it’s regular attendees--is an annual weekend-long event held in Chicago, dedicated to science fiction, fantasy and otherwise speculative literature. This year Dean's favorite author, C.J. Novak, is appearing as a panelist. Naturally, he shells out the cash for an all access pass.

Event Horizon by Winglesss (6.4k)

Castiel couldn't have helped his sister. That's why being offered a chance to help somebody else dealing with suicidal thoughts he took it without hesitation.

When he gets the first text from someone who needs his help, nothing goes as he expected.

My Own Little World by tale_to_tell (6.8k)

Castiel stumbles into a local café in order to avoid the rain, and during the process he meets a very attractive barista by the name of Dean Winchester. It doesn't take long for Castiel to fall in love with Dean's wit and charm.

Too bad that Dean has a boyfriend.

Lost and Found by whelvenwings (7.7k)

“Chuck Shurley? Sure, I’ve read his books. Kinda Vonnegut, but like, Kilgore-Trout Vonnegut, you know?” Dean took another gulp of his whisky, and smacked his lips like an adult. The guy sitting beside him at the bar, however, did not look suitably impressed. In fact, he was staring down into the bubbles of his cider, not even noticing the way that Dean was smiling at him, giving him the eyes.

“I thought his stuff was pretty good, in a kinda metamodern way,” Dean added airily, and a little more loudly.

The guy only nodded gloomily. Dean almost clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth in frustration. C’mon, dude, I’m trying to impress you. Twenty minutes of talking and all Dean had to show for it was a weird first name, a series of dour stares and the strangest need to know more about this – Castiel.

In the House of the Rising Bun by starryiedd (9k)

Dean Winchester only has three rules concerning the cafe he and his brother Sam own, "House of the Rising Bun".

1. Any and all opportunities to make a pun will be taken.

2. Free regular coffee with your student ID (If you want some of that fancy nonsense you gotta pay, sorry kids).

3. Anyone and everyone is always welcome.

Between Dean running the shop full-time and Sam helping out whenever he isn't in class, there really isn't a whole lot of time for romance for either of them. But that all changes when they gain a new regular - some writer from London - who may or may not have the bluest eyes Dean's ever seen.

Once Upon a Time in a Christmas Bakery by noxsoulmate (10k)

What would Christmas Time be without a little fun in a Christmas Bakery?

akasha by quillquiver (14k)

Five years ago, an angel fell off the coast of Cannon Beach, Oregon.

Dean’s coming off a vamp nest in Boise when he gets the call on his Other Other Cell: two dead, definitely his kinda thing. But when he arrives in town, what originally looks like a cut-and-dry case soon turns up more questions than it does answers: What kind of monster uses medical equipment to exsanguinate its victims? Why is this monster here in the first place?

And what the hell is up with the witch at the end of the street?

Something Icky This Way Comes by almaasi (21k)

Charlie Bradbury is a professional investigator of supernatural happenings, and Dean Winchester is her work partner and best friend, currently bunking in their office. Requiring insight for a particularly bizarre case on the night before Halloween, they call their go-to FBI lab guy, Castiel – who Dean hates. Totally and completely despises. And yet somehow they’ve always gotten along perfectly well in the heat of the moment. Anyway, there’s an ectoplasm-producing rabbit high on catnip floating around the office, and the creature’s predicament really needs to be addressed, or Charlie’s Halloween party will have to be cancelled. And nobody wants that. Least of all, Cas.

Serendipity by whelvenwings (23k)

Stuck on opposite sides of the country, Dean and Cas make big sacrifices to be together at a special time of the year. However, when they realise that their joint idea of paying a surprise visit to each other's faraway home has left them still trapped miles away from each other, they have to find some way to meet in the middle - and it has to be before midnight if it's going to be perfect...

Lucky Winner by natmoose (31k)

Dean wins a trip to Paris. In and of itself, that’s an amazing thing, but the problem is: he isn’t in a relationship with Lisa anymore, and the trip requires a romantic partner. The obvious choice is Cas, his roommate and best friend of 3 years, but coming with that are some very very complicated feelings and things Dean absolutely doesn’t want to deal with.

But Dean isn’t selfish and also really wants to give his overworked best friend a well deserved holiday, so the only and best solution is to take Cas to Paris, romantic theme be damned. What Dean doesn’t know is that their whole trip will be documented by a photographer from the company - so to avoid their vacation being cut short, Dean and Cas will have to convincingly play a couple.

4545 by anyrei and queerwerewolf (120k)

Albert Einstein predicted that, while he didn’t know with what weapons World War III would be fought, World War IV would be fought with sticks and stones. He wasn’t far off.

Humanity is surviving in a world without daylight, in a society where emotions are a luxury no one is allowed to have. But how important is surviving when you have nothing to live for? Two hunters find the answer to that question when they stumble over a miracle in the shape of a strange, blue-eyed man in a beige coat bearing… chocolate? Whatever that is.

I hope you enjoy reading these hidden gems! Thank you to all the amazing writers who share their work with us, and happy reading!

[verobatto]

Unrequited Destiel...

The Legend of The Sun and The Moon

I just wanted to explain in a few words to those that are asking why Dean didn't reply to Cas or why is Jensen talking about angelical way to feel things.

I know they're a lot of post saying WE TOLD YOU THIS AND THAT, and is true. Because if you read my Destiel Chronicles from the beginning, you will see I ALWAYS CALLED THE UNREQUITED LOVE FROM CAS AND DEAN'S POV.

Some of you disbelieves this idea, but is the only way to intepretate why Destiel is the slowest slow burn ever.

No more intro, let's suffer together...

Season 4 and 5 JUST A FLIRTING GAME

Once Dean was pulled out from Hell, Castiel wanted to talk with him. He didn't wait a second. Things blew and it was messy, and even Bobby was scared that that thing would hurt his idjit. But it was just Cas, trying to speak with Dean, desperately trying to reach him in his true form. Why? Because he wanted to talk with him. He had to explain Dean's mission but also, he felt fascinated. And even more after their first meeting face to face when he was finally able to find a vessel.

And Dean just it took him just a little of his time to feel the same fascination. The almighty angel, that could see right through his soul.

But also the angel that said things like...

And we have the handprint too, such an intimate sign between these two.

Castiel showing him, honestly showing him with words and actions, his special interest on him:

"My superiors begun to question my sympathies. I was getting too close to the humans in my charge. You."

How would Dean take this here? The poor guy just decided to check out the angel, and speechless as he was at that moment, couldn't reply to it. "Is he flirting with me? Does he know how gay this sounds?"

Then Cas rebel against Heaven for Dean. Dean pushed him, the whole he pushed Cas to help him. If you rewatch season 4 Dean is constantly asking Cas to help him. Because he already know Cas was different. Because he felt Cas was his friend, his ally, and something else it was growing up in his chest.

While Cas pushed him against the wall, cut his forearm and drew the sigil, Dean's face is full of awe. He can't believe this soldier powerful angel is doing this for him.

And then... "We're making it up as we go."

Gif credit @cyxnrose

The beginning of season 5 is a very busy Cas searching for God, but also, the flirtation begins. Dean is like a cute boy flirting with his crush. The second meaning jokes, trying to figure out if Cas catch it is hilarious. But he will understand 'Cas doesn't understand that reference.'

From Dean's POV in these two season, we coul under he thinks angels are junk less.

Season 6: The profound Bond and the Longing

The romantic feeling from both sides began to flow even more when Castiel goes into the black side, and the first Destiel break up appears infron of our eyes in the middle of a very romantic scenes.

Gif credit @starlightcastiel

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

The last gif is out of discussion, bot men looking at each other with sad eyes, longing and as if their conversation isn't over. Dean being disappointed at Cas and Cas trying to make him see his point. Everything he does, he does it for Dean.

And now we know why it is.

Season 7: Mourning Dean and the Jealousy

Even with Showrunner Sera Gamble trying to focus Dean's morning into a Wincest subtext, we had put king Ben Edlund came to the rescue in episode 7x09.

Putting things in order, we were faced with Dean's source of depression: Castiel's death.

So, after that, when Cas really comes back, the reunion is another romantic movie. The MEMORY LOST trope.

And then... Castiel's pseudo wife...

The trope is getting better with the spicy Jealousy in Dean's eyes.

Gif credit @impalaofgrace

So he can't completely enjoy Cas is back because:

1) He doesn't remember him: so, how can be mad or anything else if Cas doesn't remember any details of their break up?

2)The guy has a wife! Okay, so, he has a wife, he easily got a wife from... Nowhere?

And then Meg comes and he is Jealous all over again!

Dean is a really mess of feelings, but in the end, when Cas recalls everything, and when I say everything, i mean Dean, because the majority of his memories was him, Dean just pulls out from his car Castiel's bloody trenchcoat and gives it him back!

So, if there was any doubts about why was Dean mourning and depressed for, we have the confirmation!

Then, let's turn the page, because now is Cas the mess... Depressed and suffering, because he almost destroy heaven, but, do you know what cares the most to Cas and when he cheers up? Yes...

When Dean says... "I RATHER JAVE YOU, CURSED OR NOT" Castiel immediately changed his face, he smiles, and kept staring at Dean with heart eyes. He was happy because Dean was forgiving him. Because since he recovered his memories, the biggest cause of it was Dean's rejection. Dean not being able to forgive him. That was the main cause of his sadness. That's why he avoided reality, he didn't have a cause, because his cause was Dean and Dean was mad at him. But now? Cas is happy again. That's why he decides to come back to battle. "I'll go with you."

Season 8 Purgatory of love and Pining!Dean

Okay, is in this season, Carver era, when Dean's POV has a turning point about Castiel and his true feelings for him and is in this season, when Dean starts pining strongly for the angel, and feeling his love is unrequited.

The cause of it, is Purgatory. The Purity about Purgatory resided in the capacity of that place to resides in abolish every human necessity to let the mind to focused in what really matters. In this case for Dean was SURVIVE AND CAS.

So we can say that what remained pure in Dean's heart was TO FIND CASTIEL.

That's why he prayed to him every night, and that's why in the moment Cas CONFESS he ran away to protect him, something in Dean changes forever.

Gif credit @agusvedder

If you pay attention to Dean's face reaction here, is the expression of the man that realizes in that precisely moment his feelings for Castiel. Even Cas stares to a side, because there was Benny watching them, and the thing he was about to say it was too intimate. I did it to protect you.

Dean, the Big Protector, is being protected by Castiel. So, in Purgatory, Dean Winchester find out his not platonic love for his best friend.

Then we had the entire season with pining!Dean and deception.

Dean's mind invented one excuse for Castiel running away from him because thinking his best friend abbandoned him, was just too painful. He does this again when Cas pushed him inside the gate and he stays in Purgatory. Dean just rewrote in his mind the whole sequence. Imagining that Cas was defeated. But the reality was, Castiel wanted to stay. And when Cas reveals this truth to the hunter, Dean's face is a mix of deep sadness and deception. He felt really rejected by his friend. He felt his unrequited romantic love for him. But he will feel it more stronger in the crypt scene, with the brainwashing and how Castiel's love for Dean broke th connection. But he left. That was a real rejection the hunter barely could handled.

Season 9: Pinning!Castiel and Human!Cas

When Cas became Human, he has to face all the intensity of human's feelings. In this season, is time for our angel to realize his romantic love for the hunter.

Castiel will mirroring Dean's pining in season 8, and he will also feel rejected by him.

Just like Dean in season 8, Castiel will feel his romantic love is unrequited, after Dean kicked him out from the bunker, being this the parallel to the crypt scene.

But then Cain's mark comes, and everything gets worst.

Season 10: Castiel is Dean's Colette

The whole Cain's mark was the visual sign of the Destiel handprint (profound bond) attempt of break.

With Cain and Dean going through a perfect parallelism in which Crowley was placed in the friend's spot, Sam in the brother's spot and Castiel in Colette's spot. Blatant and canon exposure of what Cas means for Dean.

But now, is time for Dean, after came back for being a demon, to feel unrequited again. And this is a detail that could be not seen, but it caught my attention.

CASTIEL: At least temporarily. It’s a long story. Crowley, stolen grace. There’s a female outside in the car.

This is what Castiel says when he goes into Dean's room and after Dean praises him...

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

Dean had been with Crowley when he was a demon this whole time, so Cas was heartbroken. Even this season opens with a very depressed Castiel in the bed just let himself die because Dean was gone. So, that's why Cas says this.

So you went with Crowley, i have a female in my car. See? I don't need you.

He was Jealous, and now Dean gets Jealous, but he also gets the sensation again of his love for Castiel is unrequited.

The episode that followed this one, Dean goes into a blind date with random chick he took from a date app (very ooc, but he did it because he had his heart broken and because he thought CAS had cheated on him while he was gone as a demon.)

Season 11: Dean resist a forced bond with Amara because he's bonded with Castiel

Season 11 is a blatant exposure of Dean's feelings for Castiel. There a lot of hints throughout the season telling us Dean is in love, just like in season 9 there was hints of this with Castiel. (Again, mirroring each other).

Dean resisted Amara because of his love for Castiel. But Cas is oblivious about this.

When Castiel is possesed by Lucifer, Dean switch's into desperate mode. If he was worried about his attraction for Amara, now the only thing he cares was Castiel, exposing again WHO DEAN IS IN LOVE WITH.

But when Dean wanted to rescue Castiel, and Cas didn't want to come back to him, it hurt him worst. Again, just like in season 8, Dean can't handle Cas doesn't want to come back with him (first from Purgatory and now from being possesed). Again Dean feels rejected and unrequited. That's why when Cas is back and the end of the world is close... Dean says these words...

"You're our brother, Cas. I want you to know that."

And Cas' face...

Gif credit @mad-as-a-box-of-frogs

That's a man with the heart broken, mostly because we know now he was in love with Dean CANON FACT! (sobbing louder).

Season 12 and the confusing I LOVE YOU

This season was full of married couple situations, but mostly, we had Castiel's I Love You in the barn, before "dying".

At first Dean thinks the angel was saying this as goodbye, expressing into words his feelings for the Winchesters. Because as and angel, maybe Cas was feeling he has to protect them all. But then he says this singular I Love You to Dean, and the guy doesn't know how to take it. It was a platonic ILY? A non platonic ILY? Does angels feel the same like us? Does he sees me as a brother? Dean was truly a mess, so he decides to respond to that with a Mixtape.

But, when Castiel disappears for days, he sinks again into that sensation of unrequited romantic love.

Then Cas comes back, and then he goes away again, and then he dies.

Season 13: The reunion and the meaning of Castiel coming back

Dean's mourning for Cas can't be interpreted otherwise than LOSING THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE.

And the longing for his angel plus some Nougat powers, brought him back.

The thing is, Dean didn't expr as his feeling for Castiel and when the angel asked him that he needed to believed that he came back for a reason, Dean goes...

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

This sound like if he was recruiting Cas for war. And Cas' took it as that. So he came back to soldier angel mode. Because, okay, if Dean and Sam needed him to fight, he will fight.

Unrequited Love again.

Season 14 Healing Dean and the prelude of the break up

Post-possesed Dean is a follow up of self knowledge and self growing. He was healing the whole season.

But in episode 14x04 we heard Dean being Jealous or hurt because Castiel didn't go to rescue him and then because he goes into hunts with Jack. Unrequited love again.

Did Cas miss me as I missed him?

Is the first time Dean will actually name the word LOVE talking with the kid.

And then Mary dies and everything is a mess.

Dean yells YOU ARE DEAD TO ME, and how sad that sounds now that the angel had died again. Saving his life.

Dark clouda over our ship...

Season 15: And Maybe is not too late...

In season 15 we lived the angst of the Destiel break up, but then their reunion in Purgatory was beautiful.

Again, facing the fact that he could lost Cas one more time, Dean went down on his knees and prayed to him, and because he was in Purgatory, his heart and mind were released from any distraction, and he was plenty focused in the love he feels for his angel.

He cried, and begged for him to come back.

And he found him, following his heart, the profound bond he has with Castiel.

But, when he was about to say something that he hadn't said in the prayer, Castiel cut him off. So... Again the hunter had to swallow his words and the unrequited love punch him again.

Then... Castiel's romantic love confession took Dean by surprise, because, now that you read all the clues i gave you and i convinced you that Dean and Cas thought their love were unrequited, you will understand Dean's reaction.

Gif credit @spnsmile

Dean didn't can't believe Cas had loved him the way he does this whole time and now, he will lose him again. Is too much pain he can't handle.

For a lot of reasons we had analyzed so many times (Dean's arc has to have a closure expressing his ILY to the angel, the Empty plot is not ended, Etc) Is logical to think Cas will come back in the last episode, and this slow burn story will end with them being together, finally.

To Conclude:

The legend of the Sun and the Moon talks about two lovers that can't be reunited but they love each other deeply.

Is accurate with Destiel, because these two men had always being pining for each other but never be able to be together as they wish.

Castiel always thinking Dean doesn't reciprocate his romantic feeling for him and Dean thinking because Cas is an angel, he doesn't love him back romantically.

The Sacred Oath always playing in Castiel's POV as an impediment too and Dean's love clocked in shame too.

The deal with the Empty had been settled as we suspected in season 14, as a romantic plot. So, it has to have a closure.

These thoughts are based on the volumes from my assay "The Destiel Chronicles", currently in it's 87th volume.

See you soon! Have faith!

Destiel Is Forever!

Tagging @gneisscastiel @emblue-sparks @magnificent-winged-beast @weird-dorky-little-d @michyribeiro @maleansu @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @mybonsai1976 @anarchiana @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @feathered-cas @bre95611 @zoerayne2426 @justmeand-myinsight @that-one-fandom-chick @proccastinate @studio-hatter @pepevons @poorreputation @mrsaquaman187 @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @dwstiel @ladygon @shippsblog @la-random-fangirl @lets-try-this-again-please @mychemicalobsession514 @destiel-shipper-11

@asphodelesauvage @2musiclover2

Buenos Aires November 17th 2020 8:33 PM

[caranfindel]

Recap/review 15.18: “Despair”

THEN: The key to Billie's library. Billie wants to become God. Cas made a deal with The Empty. Chuck absorbed Amara. Jack absorbed Adam's rib. Dean pointed a gun at Sam (DEAN POINTED A GUN AT SAM.) Chuck is pissed. Jack is going to explode.

NOW: We begin right where we left off last week, with Jack about to explode with God-killing power. Sam half-carries him into the map table room, Cas tells him to take deep breaths and focus, and Dean gets all panicky and is no help at all. Jack wants the guys to just leave him outside in order to minimize the damage when he goes kaboom. {Sidebar... how far away would he have to be, considering that his explosive power could kill God? Discuss.} Dean yells at Sam to find one of Rowena's spells (and oh, Sam as Rowena's apprentice; there's a plot that was sadly wasted, wasn't it?) but he's interrupted by Billie and her scythe, which she's carrying in a very obvious way. She's furious, and tells them the plan to destroy Chuck was doomed "because of you." Billie can't stop Jack's earth-shattering kaboom, "but there is something I can do." She sends him to the Empty. Empty!Meg cheerfully points out that he doesn't look so hot, but then he looks explosively hot. Ah, there's our earth-shattering kaboom!

Bunker. Billie explains that The Empty was the only option to absorb the impact of Jack the Bomb. And that he's not necessarily dead, because taking out Chuck and Amara was the part that was fatal, not actually being the bomb. Hmm. So Jack's point of no return wasn't actually a point of no return after all. It's kinda retconny, but not really? I've decided it's logical and I approve.

However, if the Empty survives, "it's gonna be pissed." Particularly at Billie. And it's very strong. Billie and Sam remind us that the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned. They do not get into the details of what constitutes a summoning, but I'm sure that isn't important. And Billie might be willing to bring Jack back, assuming he survived, but not until Sam returns what he took from her. Chuck's death book.

Sam immediately goes on the attack. He points out that she was planning to betray them from the start, leading to the deaths of all the AU refugees and everyone who was brought back from death, including him and Dean. "Even if I give you the book," he says, "what's to stop you from stabbing us in the back? Killing us all?"

"Nothing," Billie says. She gets up in Sam's face and tells him Jack won't last long. Either give her the book now, or lose him forever. (Can I just point out that Sam is still a little bloody from Dean punching him in the face? After he pointed a gun at him?)

Meanwhile, in the Empty, we discover that Jack is still alive (yay) and that this episode was directed by Richard Speight (yay). He is surrounded by particles that gradually form back into Empty!Meg. And, as predicted, she's pissed.

In the bunker, Sam brings the book to Billie, but ignores her outstretched hand and slams it onto the table instead. It's a pointless little burst of defiance and I love it.

Billie flips to the end to read the new ending of God's book, "since you ruined the last one." She seems to like what she reads. Sam says "Wait, the ends of your books change? So me killing Rowena was presented as unavoidable fate but it really wasn't necessary at all?" No, he actually doesn't. But I do, on his behalf. It's a pointless little burst of defiance. Over in the Empty, Empty!Meg grabs Jack's head and says "you made it loud!" and this is a conversation I've had with my dogs in the wee dark hours of the morning more times than I can count because we just want to SLEEP, GUYS but before she can actually crush his head, Billie zaps him back to the bunker.

Billie tells the guys that Jack is hers because he's still useful. Dean responds by grabbing her scythe and swinging at her. She flings him away, but she's wounded and bleeding light. Oh, and she dropped the book. Sam and Cas ignore Dean crumpled over against the wall - Cas runs to comfort Jack, and Sam runs to pick up the book. Unfortunately, he can't open it. Dean says "hey, thanks for not helping me, guys" and Sam says "oh, I'm sorry, I guess I'm still a little rattled from you punching me in the face after you pointed a gun at me." No, he doesn't. But I do, on his behalf.

Several people have pointed out how skinny Jared looks in these last few episodes, but this is the first time I've noticed it. It will be interesting to see how he looks in the two that were filmed after their Covid shutdown.

Time jump. Dean is sitting in the library, drinking whiskey. And I've said it a million times but I'll say it again - I could watch an entire episode that was just Dean drinking. And then it gets even better when Sam walks in wearing only a v-neck t-shirt. Single layer Sam alert, guys! How long has it been? Dean slides the bottle over to him and we get a little bonus hand porn and then this happens:

Sam, I'm sorry about... everything.

Dean, you don't have to -

I pulled a gun on you. It's like I just couldn't stop. You know, we were so close to beating him. Like, I could smell Chuck's blood in the water, and I - nothing else mattered. It was everything. And I just couldn't snap out of it.

Well, you did. You've snapped me out of worse.

Hmmm. Am I missing a time when Dean snapped Sam out of something? I mean, I know in Stull, Sam was able to overcome Lucifer because of Dean. But that was Sam snapping himself out of it. And Dean convinced Sam to give up the trials, but that wasn't Sam under anything that he needed to be "snapped out of." I think if you're going to give Dean credit for snapping himself out of it when confronted by his teary eyed, bloodied little brother, you have to give Sam credit for snapping himself out of his own situations.

It doesn't matter. All that matters is these two sitting quietly in the dark, drinking whiskey together.

Dean's feeling some despair (nice) because Billie wants them dead, Jack is powerless (oh, wait, when did that happen?), and Michael isn't answering his prayers. No one is on their side. "Well, we regroup, somehow," says Sam. They drink a sad little toast to "somehow," and I die a thousand deaths.

Billie's library. Billie stalks angrily through the stacks. A reaper informs her he put up warding to keep the Empty out, and asks if the plan has changed. Yes, it has.

Elsewhere, a woman we don't know is cooking some seriously dry scrambled eggs. She thinks she knows what she's doing, because she's explaining to someone else in the room how to cook eggs so they're "not too runny, not too dry" but seriously. Gordon Ramsay would be appalled. {Sidebar: Gordon's eggs actually look a bit too runny for my taste, and my family would refuse to eat them, but this lady's dry crumbly eggs are still an abomination.} She turns around and we see AU Charlie sitting at the kitchen table. Oh, Charlie has a girlfriend! Sweet. And she must be in love, because she tells this girlfriend that they're the best eggs she's ever had. And also, she's still hunting. Guess she didn't retire to a mountaintop after all. Probably because she couldn't get wifi. Anyway. Her girlfriend's plate crashes to the floor because her girlfriend abruptly disappeared. (Aw, her name was Stevie. Stevie and Charlie. How cute is that?)

Time jump. Charlie's apartment building is called Kim Manor. Nice.

As Sam runs the EMF meter (and there's a nice wordless conversation where Sam lets Dean know he didn't find anything), Charlie talks about how they met (thanks to AU Bobby) and how she experienced nothing when Stevie disappeared. No sulphur smell, no cold, nothing. Dean and Sam have another wordless conversation about what they think happened.

Dean and Sam explain that Billie wants to send all the AU people back to their now non-existent worlds. So Stevie was from AU World too? I guess that explains how AU Bobby knew her. Coincidentally, Sam's phone rings, and it's AU Bobby. They have an extremely short conversation in which Sam learns that another AU hunter simply vanished. And there's no explanation on Sam's end, just "yeah, I understand." So have they already talked to AU Bobby about the Billie situation? Or was Sam and Bobby's conversation literally "hey, a hunter vanished into thin air, how weird is that" and "yeah, I understand" with no further discussion? Anyway. Dean says it's open season on anyone from another world (aw, sorry, Winchesters in Brazil), anyone who came back from the dead, and Sam gets a horrified look on his face and says "Eileen." Oh shit!

Meanwhile, out by the Impala, in broad daylight, Jack tells Cas that he feels strange because the plan failed and his destiny was averted. "I was ready to die, and I wanted to - for Sam, for Dean, for the world - I wanted to make things right. And now I don't know why I'm even here." OF COURSE HE LISTED SAM FIRST. Cas tells him he didn't need absolution from anyone, and that they care about him not because of his usefulness, but just because he's him. Somewhere Dean says "um, wait." Jack is scared because he's powerless and can't protect anyone. Cas is too. So, did Jack lose his powers after the earth shattering kaboom? Or earlier, and I just wasn't paying attention?

Nighttime. Dean speeds down the road as Sam texts Eileen. I don't know where Eileen is, but she must be pretty far away from Kim Manor. Sam told her to get out of her house, go somewhere public, and wait by her car. Now, I cover the guest star credits, so I don't know if Shoshanna is in this episode. But even unspoiled, I'm pretty sure she's not going to be there when they arrive. She starts to type a response, as evidenced by the bubbles, but then stops responding. Yep, just as I thought, no one is standing by her car. Sam finds her phone on the ground, cracked as if it were dropped (like, say, by someone who disappeared while holding it) and LOOK AT HER LOCKSCREEN. LOOK AT IT.

Some will say this is just the photo that pops up when Sam texts her but they are WRONG. This is her FREAKING LOCK SCREEN, PEOPLE.

Anyway. He sees the unfinished message she was writing, which says she's by her car. Aw, Sam. Dean tries to talk to him and he says "I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now."

Aw, SAM!

Sam compartmentalizes his grief and jumps into take-care-of-everyone mode. He says they need to gather everyone together, and they need to find a location central to everyone. Well, I mean, there is one place I know of that is literally the central most point in the United States, maybe you could go there? It's supposed to be secure from all things supernatural, too. Dean says that while Sam is going that, he is going to go end what he started. OH, GOOD. I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD SPLIT UP. "We couldn't make Chuck pay, but Billie? She left her blade. Her I can kill." Hey, wouldn't be the first time. Sam agrees, Cas says he'll go with Dean, and we get a brother hug. Once again, Dean does the two things I love when he hugs Sam: 1. he puts his arms on top, as if he were still the taller brother, and b. he looks away and packs up his emotions before he lets Sam see his face after the hug. "Let's go, Cas," he says. "Let's go reap a reaper." Cas turns and follows without saying anything at all to Sam or Jack, but I'm sure that won't be an issue.

Time jump - it's daytime. Sam's on the phone with Donna, who is standing outside her truck (but didn't she used to have a big black SUV?) at that bridge we've seen so many times. She's sending him to "the old Harmon property," which should be just what he's looking for because it has an abandoned silo. I mean, I wouldn't jump immediately to abandoned silo, but maybe there weren't any abandoned warehouses around. She says it's in Hastings, just south of her, and if you think I didn't confirm that the town of Hastings is in fact about 30 minutes south of Stillwater, Minnesota then you just don't know me at all.

Sam is at a gas station and oh, he's driving Eileen's car! That's not heartbreaking at all. I guess she didn't have her keys in her pocket when she disappeared. (Hah, like Sam Winchester needs keys.) Donna and AU Bobby are rounding up everyone they can think of. She asks what the plan is, and Sam bends down creepily to look at Jack in the passenger seat and says "I'm still working on that." I mean, I know they keep telling us Jack lost his powers, but the way Sam looks at him right here certainly suggests Jack is part of the plan, and maybe not in a good way. (Spoiler alert: seriously, why do I even bother.)

Sam comes around to Jack's window and tells him he needs him to drive, because Sam needs to work on archives and spells and stuff. And is that true, or is this just "I don't expect you to live through this part so I want to let you have some time behind the wheel of Eileen's 1970 Plymouth Valiant?" (At least that's what The Husband thinks it is.)

Bunker. Enter Dean and Cas. Dean declares that if Billie isn't in her library, they'll just trash the place to "smoke her out." It's an interesting choice of words.

Foreshadowing Dean as the new Death? (Remember, I'm completely unspoiled. I know nothing.)

Silo. Let's stick to this location for now. Sam and Jack pull up and are greeted by Donna. Jack goes inside to set up the warding, and Donna gives Sam a nice hug.

I want to be there.

She tells him she's sorry about Eileen and gets one of his sad little nods that I love so much. Bobby is already here, and she name-drops Garth and Jody and the girls, saying they're on "high alert." Sam tells her they're not on Billie's list, so they should be safe. And so should Donna. Well, that's good to know. Sam's surprised to see Charlie pull up. She tells him "I just don't want this to happen to anyone else." I don't know what you think you're going to be able to do, Charlie, but okay.

Turns out the silo is actually a Tardis, so I guess maybe it was a good choice. It's huge on the inside, and is also more finished than any silo I've ever been in (which is, okay, one silo, but still.) The interior is already heavily warded. Several people are milling about. {Sidebar: How many hunters were away from the bunker when Michael attacked, and why have none of them returned?} Bobby tells Sam that as soon as the hunters heard he wanted them there, they came running. "Whether you like it or not, you're the big man here." Hey, I wonder if the guy who called him Chief is here. Bobby, being a man after my own heart, is mostly concerned about the bathroom situation. Sam hopes they won't be there long enough for it to be an issue. He has a spell from Rowena (!) that should boost the strength of the wards, but that's all he has. Bobby doesn't look very reassured, and glances in a foreshadowy way at a family with kids. Sam looks around at all of these people he feels responsible for and takes a deep breath and oh, my heart.

Donna and Jack are painting more wards. Jack bends down to look at a plant, and Donna comes up to him and says "I'm no expert on this hoodoo stuff, but best we patch that up, yeah?" and I don't know what the hell she's talking about. What is this plant disturbing? Jack reaches out to touch the plant and it withers away as his hand gets close. Friends, I'm pretty sure this is a bad sign. Jack is too. He stares at his hand, and if he'd been watching a few seasons ago, he would have noticed that plants did the same thing when Amara touched them. Coincidence???

Later we see everyone watch as Sam recites the spell. (Yes, it's hot. Do you even have to ask?) The sigils glow red briefly and then fade, and the music turns ominous and I think this means his boost failed. But I guess not, because Sam says now they wait. But they don't have to wait long, because suddenly one of the children dissolves into smoke. One by one, all of the AU people dissolve like they've been snapped by Thanos. Charlie runs up to Sam and says "Sam, what do we do" just like Maggie did, and just like Maggie she's taken out immediately. Sam watches in horror as AU Bobby smokes out. He turns to Donna, who says "Mr. Stark, I don't feel so good," and then Donna is gone! Crap! Jack and Sam are left staring at the empty-except-for-them silo.

One more serving of despair, coming right up.

On to the other side.

Dean enters Billie's library, brandishing the scythe. Cas follows, bearing only a hangdog expression. Dean motions for him to go one direction and Dean goes the other, soon finding Billie. He thinks he's sneaking up behind her, but she says "So, I guess this is the part where I say hello boys. Hello, boys." Oh, I was wrong; Cas has his angel blade. Billie snarks about Dean's bad aim, and he says he wasn't trying to kill her then (which seems like a lie), but he is now, because of what she's doing to his people. Billie slams him against the wall again. She chokes Cas Darth Vader-style from a distance, and then the old fashioned way. "Remember when you stabbed me in the back?" she says. "Because I do." Oh, that's funny, because earlier Sam said she was going to stab them in the back. She should have said "like you stabbed me?"

Dean comes to the rescue by poking her with the blunt end of the scythe rather than the pointy end, so maybe she was right about his bad aim. Then he gets the blade against her throat (but still not the sharp end, just the back) and demands that she stop killing his friends. She says she didn't - it was Chuck. And Dean's wasting time.

I'm considering it time well spent, because it looks so nice.

Billie tells Dean the injury he gave her earlier is something she can't recover from - she's going to die. She pulls away her coat to show him a nasty festering wound, and I wonder why something so physical would kill her, but. Eh. She tells him she doesn't care about his friends or family. "But seeing you here has reminded me of something. There is one thing I'd like. One wish before I go. I'd like to see you dead." She grabs her scythe back, flings the boys around, and slowly stalks toward them. Dean and Cas rush through the door back into the bunker.

Dean is panicky again, trying to figure out what to do next. He's suddenly struck down by chest pain, and I expect to see someone sticking a knife (or a scythe) in his back, but it's actually Billie doing it Darth Vader-style again. Cas drags him away as Billie monologues. "It's you, Dean; it's always been you. Death-defying. Rule-breaking. You are everything I lived to set right. To put down. To tame. You are human disorder incarnate." Yeah, we know, Dean's awesome. We get this speech every season.

Cas and Dean end up in the dungeon storeroom. Cas gets Dean's knife out of his pocket and cuts his own hand to paint a sigil on the door. It looks like an angel banishing sigil, but apparently it block's Billie's power. Not permanently, though, because it fades as she pounds on the door. Cas says that since the wound is killing her, they just have to wait her out.

Yeah, and if we can't?

Then we fight.

We'll lose. I just led us into another trap. All because I couldn't hurt Chuck. Because I was angry, and because I just needed something to kill, and because that's all I know how to do.

Dean.

It was Chuck all along. We never should have left Sam and Jack. We should be there with them now.

Yes you should, Dean, you really really should. Dean is practically drowning in despair, which, you know. Is a good thing. 10/10 would recommend. "She's gonna get through that door," he tells Cas. "And she's gonna kill you, and then she's gonna kill me. I'm sorry."

"Wait, there is one thing she's afraid of," Cas says. "There's one thing strong enough to stop her." He tells Dean about the deal he made to save Jack in the Empty.

Friends, I'm going to do you a favor. If you haven't seen the episode, and aren't planning to watch the episode, I want you to read this paragraph and then skip down until you see the pretty picture of Dean. And start reading after that picture. Trust me. So, Cas summons the Empty just as Billie breaks down the door. The Empty kills Billie, but she also takes Cas. Dean is saved but Cas is gone.

{Sigh. Can I skip this part? No, I owe it to you.}

Cas explains that the Empty was going to come snatch him away as soon as he experienced a moment of true happiness. But happiness isn't having, happiness is knowing. And Dean is wonderful and "Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love." You just threatened to shoot your little brother for love, for example. Cas is teary eyed and Dean looks confused as hell and I pause the TV and turn to The Husband and we have this conversation:

I don't think I can watch this.

Why, because it's so sappy?

No, because I think they're going to kiss.

What? Why would they kiss? Is there something I'm missing?

Because part of the fandom WANTS them to kiss, and there's this group of fans that are super obnoxious about it, and they harass the actors and the writers and I think now the show thinks EVERYBODY wants them to kiss. Even though the guy who plays Dean* says it would never happen. Because I know he wasn't happy about the way the show ended, and I'm afraid this is why he wasn't happy.

...

I don't think they're gonna kiss.

If they do, I'm done.

*The Husband is not on a first name basis with Jensen.

So, let me point out that The Husband, who watches this show the way a normal human being watches a show (i.e., doesn't interact with the fandom at all), had absolutely NO expectation that they would kiss. Anyway, with some trepidation, I push play again. And Cas is still going. Dean is the most caring, selfless, loving human being on earth (OH GOD MAKE IT STOP) and knowing him has changed Cas.

Why does this sound like a goodbye?

Because it is. I love you.

Don't do this, Cas.

We see a black blob materialize behind Dean, because even though the Empty can only come to Earth if it's summoned, there it is. And I could argue about whether Cas being happy actually summoned the damn thing but I've already lost the will to live, so instead I'm going to describe to you how I watched in horror, with my finger hovering over the pause button, as Cas reached out to Dean and put his hand on his shoulder. But he just pushed him out of the way. Thank you baby Jesus. Billie breaks the door down as the Empty slurps into the dungeon. It surrounds Cas and Billie and sucks them into its depths. Dean is left alone. Oh, and he has a bloody palm print on his jacket from Cas grabbing his shoulder. I guess someone did watch a little bit of older seasons after all. Hard to tell sometimes.

I mean, at least he looked good, right?

Back at the silo. I've decided it must be mostly underground and isn't a grain silo like I thought. So what kind of silo do Yankees have that's mostly underground? Anyway. Jack and Sam emerge, having failed catastrophically at their mission. Sam is trying to call Dean, who isn't answering. He looks mildly panicky. "Sam?" Jack says, a little shaky. "Was it just them?"

OH CRAP. I didn't even think of that possibility.

"I don't know," Sam says, also shaky. And as we see an empty gas station and playground, it really looks like it wasn't just them at all. Sam and Jack look at each other, alone and terrified. And back in the bunker's dungeon, Dean's phone rings. It's Sam. He doesn't answer.

Despair!

So. You know how sometimes something really good will happen in an episode? And I'll say, no matter how bad this episode is, this 90 seconds makes it worth it? Well, sometimes the opposite happens. Sometimes you get a two or three minute scene - a horribly written, badly acted scene - and it's so awful that it ruins an episode. A season. A show. I'm angry that the showrunners pandered to a small, noisy minority of fans to throw something into the show that most fans didn't want and didn't help the story at all. I'm annoyed that, once again, Dean is put up on an embarrassingly overwrought pedestal. I'm kind of amused that they did this in the worst way possible. Cas's love was unrequited (unless they screw that up in the next episode), Misha's acting caused so much secondhand embarrassment that I had a hard time watching again, and from what I see on Tumblr, half of the Destihellers are furious because "Dean is a homophobe." Which is bullshit. Not returning someone's romantic affection isn't homophobia. It's consent. (I know... on this show? Ha ha.)

{Sidebar: If "Destiel" means the characters have mutual feelings for each other, doesn't this mean Destiel is not, in fact, canon? I mean, it was already so badly written that one could argue Cas wasn't proclaiming romantic love, but just a life-changing experience thanks to one human. Discuss.}

But I need to stop thinking about it. I can't - if I let myself go there, I'll lose my mind, I can't right now.

And this wasn't even the Buckleming episode, friends. There is probably a Buckleming episode left.

I got so distracted by this nonsense that I almost forgot to talk about the Jack situation. So here's how I feel about that. I love Jack as a character. I love him as someone the Winchesters could lose (Basically, someone to stuff in the fridge? Why not.) But I don't want him to be one of them. I don't want Jack's story to be treated as if it were as important as the Winchester's story. Just like I didn't want Cas to have his own plots. I want it always, always to come down to Sam and Dean.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll have more to say. But for right now, all I'm saying is this: I pledge to stick with this show, to stick with fanworks, no matter how badly they fuck up the landing. But guys, you don't have to try so hard to fuck it up.

Two to go. As always, help me stay unspoiled, including casting info and episode titles.

[deliontower]

His everything

Title: his everything  ( a little bit of magic   part 2)    Summary: Cas and reader enjoy their new relationship in secret until it isn't anymore Pairing: Cas x Reader Word count: 2k   Square filled: for @spnquotebingo :  “I envy the love you have.” Warnings: fluff, per smut (not much) and more fluff A/N: i really love the first part of this and wanted to write more, i just love how i used the readers powers and kind of want to write more with this setting. As always did a read through but might of missed a few mistakes (Its 4 am rn and i need sleep) but here it is. let me know what you think.

MAIN MASTERLIST | REQUEST OPEN 

(just pretend its the reader and not Meg) 

You had always loved watching the stars, they were one of the things that never changed through the years. Tonight in particular was clear summer night.

What made it better was the fact you had an angel with you, Castiel. After you dragged yourself away after kissing him, you kept in contact. The bond between the both of you was new, you had obviously both lived long lives but different ones.

"There're so beautiful, after all this time they stay the same" You keep your eyes on the sky.

"I remember when I first saw them but I never understood their beauty until now" He wasn’t watching the sky but watching you, staring into the night.

You smile, turning your graze to him, he looked even more beautiful in the light of the moon, his blue aura blended in with the sky, a mix of dark blue and black.  

"It's important to enjoy the small things" you reach across and hold his hand. "What else would we have if we didn't?"

He hooked his figures around yours, he was smiling too.  "well I have my family"

You laughed sweetly, "You're right you do but some of yours aren't so lucky". He held your hand tighter. "“I envy the love you have.”

"you have me now" his smile was intoxicating, everything about him was. "and when Dean and Sam find out about us, you'll stay with us"

"I hope you're right" You lay your head against his shoulder.  You were both to nerves  tell the brothers about your relationship, it was so new that you wanted to enjoy it before everyone knew. Before anyone could say anything to break it.

"They already like you" Cas said trying to reassure you.

"But they love you, I don't want them to think I'm using you or something" you frowned your brows and sighed pressing yourself closer to him.

He wrapped an arm around you waist, your t-shirt rose up and his fingers graced over the skin. His touch was another intoxicating thing about him. You couldn't get your first kiss with him out of your mind. "They won't"  

"I missed this" you closed your eyes and breathed in your surrounding, the quite night seeming even more quite when you were in his arms.

He answered by putting his fingers under your chin and lifted your face to his. And he kissed you, he was always awkward and almost standoffish with most things but god did he know how to take control.

He sucked on your lower lip seeking entrance, you opened your mouth with a smile. His moved you from next to him to his lap. You gripped onto the back of his trench coat. He slipped his hands down your back until they came to your hips.

You hummed against his lips as he pushed up your t-shirt to explore your back. His hands were the only warmth against the night air.

Just when things were heating up, Cas' phone rang. You swore as you pulled away from him. You moved back to his side when he pulled his phone from his coat pocket. You watched pouting as he spoke, the call was a sign your date was over.

"Okay, goodbye" He nodded putting his phone back. He looked over to you with a sad smile, "that was Dean, they need me for a case".

Still  pouting you fix his coat, "I thought so". You hold his cheek and smiled biting your lip. "maybe we should tell them, then I might get more time with you".

He laughed and looked down. "I like that idea". He took your hand from his cheek and kissed it.

You blushed straight away, the jester reminded you of a time long ago. When kissing someone's hand was one  the most interment thing you could done with someone.

"if you need a witch"

"I'll call you" the stood up and held his hand out for you. He walked you to your car that was parked a few feet away from his.

You were against the drivers side, just before he walked away you pulled him to you by his tie. You were both   desperately trying to make the moment slow down, it was getting harder and harder to leave every time you saw him.

He was ruffed and wide eyed when he pulled away, You were breathless and dizzy. "Don’t go to long without calling me"

"I wouldn't dream of it"

He walked away, keeping his eyes on you the whole time. You both wait for the other one to get in their car, in the end you got in first, driving away was another hard thing. From your wing mirror you could see him watching.

-x-

Smiling widely you opened the bunker door, standing by the war table was Cas looking up at you with his own wide smile. All you wanted was to throw yourself in to his arms to feel his lips against yours.  

Taking the steps two at a time you quickly looked around to see if Sam or Dean were near by, before throwing yourself at Cas. He caught you straight away, letting out a chuckle against your neck.

When you heard footsteps you withdrew yourself from his arms with a deep ache. You were sure your face matched his look for longing.

"So what do you guys need this time?" you called out, Dean came in to the room slowly followed by Sam.

You greeted both of them with a quick hug. From the side of your vision you could see how tense he looked, jealously was one thing you didn't think you'd get from Cas.    

You stood by Cas, skin screaming out to touch his hand while they explained what kind of spell they think they needed and what your opinion was. You nodded along, cutting in now and then to ask questions to get to the right answer.

"one point to the Winchester" you grin lining back against the table. "it's a basic spell really, apart from one thing". Everyone waited to hear the rest but you were enjoying having them hang on to your every word. "bone of a disgrace nun, pretty grim but it brings the whole thing together"

Sam breathed in, "We definitely won't have that lying around".

"you and Dean could pop out" you suggested.

"We would have to find where on is buried first" Dean sighed, rubbing his face. "I thought this was a simple spell."

"The spell is simple, the things you need aren't" you shrugged. "who said being a witch was easy".

"I'll get on it" Sam muttered walking away to his laptop.

You hung backs as everyone pulled out books and web pages hunting for the right person. Now an then you would met Cas eyes, it was getting harder and harder to be this close to him and not act on it. It didn't take long to find what we were looking for.

"Well you guys better get going" you sang from where you sat.    

"lets get going then" Dean rubbed his face standing up.

"Cas and I, I'll get anything ready here" you smiled, kicking yourself from the wall. Cas eyes flashes towards you when you spoke his name. Just saying his name was amazing, it tasted like honey.

Neither brother picked up on the energy flowing around the bunker or the way you and Cas were staring at each other, which was a great thing as they left with no other questions. Leaving you alone with Cas. Just want you wanted from the moment you saw him.

You giggle as he held out his arms, you felt like you were flying as you walked in to them. He smelt like he always did, like the night air no doubt from your countless night together.

His hand brushed through your H/C hair, you moved your face so you could look in to his blue eyes. His eyes dilated when they met yours.   "I've missed you" you sighed letting your head fall against his chest.

"I missed you too" you could hear the smile on his face, against his chest you could hear his heart beating away. His aura was shimmering in the light. Lifting your head up only a bit,  so you could kiss him.

He responded straight away, pulling you closer by the back of your neck. With one quick movement you jumped him and wrapped you legs around middle, with your arms around his neck. His body reacted by  gripping you tight on your waist. As you kissed he walked to the table, where he pushed you against.

The wood was hard and cool on your back. Throwing your head back, exposing your neck  to his lip. Letting him take compete control you lay back. His started to kiss your neck, moving down to your collar, then to the top of your breast that were peaking out from your t-shirt. He pulled you up suddenly attacking your lips again. You could feel how hungry he was, the air felt heavy with it. Your breath was heavy too. All you wanted was him, his soft touch, his hard but gently lips, you wanted him to take over everything. You would gladly let him.

You hands felt numb as you  unbuttoned his shirt.  You were inches away from his skin when he stopped you. You drew away to look that him. He didn't say anything, he didn't need too. He pulled at the bottom of your T-shirt. You didn't wait another second before pulling it over your head. Your skin didn’t have time to felt the cold because Cas wrapped around you. His lips went back to yours, one hand rubbed your cheek while the other worked this way under the cup of your bra.

A soft moan left your lips, taking your arms from him you unhooked the front of your bra. He pulled you flush against him, his soft shirt rubbed against your bear breast. Throwing your head back again, you left your bare chest free for his touch. He kissed his way down your chest, along the way he left small bites. Your chest was moving faster the closer he got. Your lips were parted, small puffs of air left them.

When he finally reached your nipple, he hung back. His hot breath was mocking you, he was so close but he wouldn't act. When he finally touched you again with his lips you could feel the smirk. Your heart fluttered, it would flutter when he was sweet and when he took control. When he withdrew from you, he let his tongue  be the last thing to leave you.

He lifted you up again so you could see his face. He was staring so intently you couldn't believe he was looking at you. No one had ever looked at you like that, maybe no one would again. And  truly you didn't want anyone but Cas to look at you like this, like the whole world was in his arms.

"they'll be back soon" he was breathless, shirt still half open.

You let one last puff of air leave your lips, before nodding. "I hate  doing this in secret" you sigh redoing the hook to your bra. "I just want to kiss you and not have to look who’s around".

He brushed some hair from your face, "we'll tell him soon. I promise.". Grinning wide you pull him close again.

"what the hell?!"

You pull away from him, both confused on who had just spoken. You look and see Sam and Dean staring wide eyed at you and Cas, still intertwined. your t-shirt still half way across the room and Cas’ shirt half done up.  

"hmmmm, surprise?" you sang, hoping for the best. After all this is what you wanted.      

-x-

Once again let me know what you thought

Request are open

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

(Vol. XXVIII)

It was a love story from the very beginning.

Remember me

(7x17)

Hello my dears!! Well... Welcome to this volume and I'm so happy because CAS IS BACK! 👏👏

And the most beautiful of all is ... Sera ... She had to write it. She had to write Castiel coming back and not just that, she being a Bro-only Stan, had to make it VERY VERY DESTIEL. And she made a great job. Thank you Serita.

Okay! I want to say thanks to my friend @agusvedder she made the gifs for this meta and discussed the scenes with me.

Well, what are we waiting for? Let's talk about Destiel.

Cas! You're back! But wait.. who's she?

We are going to talk just about episode 7x17 The Born Again Identity... Because it has a lot of Destiel on it, and we need an entire meta for that.

Remember my last chronicle, Dean was in bad shape, depressed and suicidal because Castiel was gone? Okay... Keep that in mind, and watch this reaction when Dean finds Castiel...

He was mourning Cas, and Bobby, and his brother was about to die too, and suddenly, he found his faith back, his best friend, that person who changed his entire existence, was alive. In front of his eyes. So yeah, in Dean's face we can see the shock.

But then, the happiness to find his friend vanished, because Castiel doesn't remember him, and worst. He's married!

The whole scene in Daphne's place is very heartbreaking for Dean.

Do we need to repeat the similitude between Dean and Daphne, the similarities in their names and the green eyes and light brown hair? Because that something very known in the fandom, so yes.

Now... This will be a travel through Dean sad facial expressions... First of all, when Emmanuel presents Daphne as his wife... Dean's face is like...

"Your wife, right."

Dean is shocked, and sad, and confused. Cas has a wife? My Cas? When this happened? And he can't remember me?

And then, the hand shake as if they were strangers, another daga in Dean's heart...

He's trying to swallow Cas doesn't remember, he's like disoriented, and even so, Cas is watching him with his typical questioning eyes. Is Cas feeling he knows this man from somewhere? Or is just curious about Dean's awkward reaction.

And I can't stop noticing the tremble in Dean's lips before articulate any word on these two gifs... Jensen played it deliciously. The nervousness, the pain and the confusion in his eyes, the brokenheart.

The name Emmanuel means the God's sent one. Cas was sent to save Sam this time?

But... The thing is... Dean is still in shock, and when he had to make some conversation in the car with Emmanuel he just threw the matter that got him in awe (and nervous, and mad, and heartbroken... Remember Jeffrey in episode 15 when the demon came back... But possesed another man? Well this is the parallel I told you... Who's she, Cas?)

DEAN: So, Daphne – is that, uh, your wife?

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: She found me and cared for me.

DEAN: Meaning?

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: Oh, it's a...strange story. You may not like it.

DEAN: Believe me, I will.

So yes, Dean is intrigued... But hurted too, there's a pause between naming Dahpne and your wife, and is the first thing he wants to speak about with CAS. Is something that's bothering him. And also he wants to know how is that Cas is alive. (I just wanted to point here... When they're in the car talking, outside the windows, there's green and blue lights passing by only... Destiel coded color... Sigh...)

When Emmanuel said it's a strange story, and maybe Dean wouldn't like it, Dean is very sure he needs to know badly what happened to his Cas that ended like this...

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: A few months ago, she was hiking by the river, and I wandered into her path, drenched and confused, and... unclothed. I had no memory. She said... God wanted her to find me.

DEAN: So who named you Emmanuel?

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: Bouncybabynames.com.

DEAN: Well, it's working for you. Must be weird not knowing who you are.

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: Well, it's my life. And it's a good life.

So maybe knowing Emmanuel name meaning, Dean said it works for you. Because Castiel is an angel. But... Keeping the "identity" topic, Dean had his issues still with Cas, his grudges... and he can't talk about it with him, because Castiel doesn't remember what he did. So yes, Dean needs to say something about those grudges he has with Cas, so he said this...

What if you were... A bad guy?

Why is Dean asking this? Because he needs to get something in return. You were bad with us, Cas.

Even if Cas tried to apologize before he died, Dean couldn't heal that wound. Because it was Cas.

And Emmanuel answer is similar to what Cas thought was doing right... I feel I'm a good person. Of course he is. He did everything thinking he was doing right. Till everything went wrong.

Dean can't forget what Cas did to him

We're in one very angsty point here. This chat in the car, is Dean trying so hard to not explode with these so many months of suffering and ruminating his best friend (and something else) betrayal. And his lost. And now he's there, with him. But he can't discuss, or talk, or threw at him his anger, because he doesn't remember.

So... The conversation gets weird...

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: So, your brother...

DEAN: Sam.

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: Sam. What's his diagnosis?

DEAN: Well, it's not exactly medical.

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: That should be fine. I can cure illness of a spiritual origin.

DEAN: Spiritual? Okay. Someone did this to him.

Okay, Emmanuel talked first about spiritual origin, so Dean should feel worst there... Yeah, spiritual is something Cas did with Sam. The anger again. The remembrance...

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: You're angry.

DEAN: Well, yeah. Dude broke my brother's head.

Emmanuel saw through those words, the tone in Dean's voice and his face. He saw Dean was angry. So Dean couldn't say these words directly to CAS, so he will say it to Emmanuel anyway, he needed to say, to vomit everything there...

And he's not just angry because of what Cas did to Sam, but ... Everything behind that action. The betrayal... His death... The talk to solve things between them that never happened...

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: He betrayed you, this dude. He was your friend?

DEAN: Yeah, well, he's gone.

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: Did you kill him? I sense that you kill a lot of people.

Two things in Emmanuel observation: he named betrayal and friend and that's the wound that didn't heal in Dean.

The hunter said HE'S GONE. Because that Cas isn't there. That's Emmanuel. So, his Cas, is gone. And that's heartbreaking too.

And Emmanuel doing his "reading minds" stuff... By the end... Dean had to vomit again more things...

Pay attention to Dean's words and the way he talks... He doesn't name "things that may hurt him" that people does... Like lying, or die. Betrayal. He didn't name it. He just says wherever it was, In one way he's avoiding those words... is hard for him to talk about this, after being depressed because of that. He confesses he always could endure those things then he repeats I always could with sorrow, because that was before Cas. Cas would be always different to him, in every aspect.

When he says... What Cas did he makes a pause... And his face is showing the pain, because what Cas did, that... He couldn't endure it. And here my friends, we have the confirmation, from Dean's mouth itself, he was in bad shape, depressed, suicidal, because of Castiel.

And he finished with a I don't know why, but we do, because we learned Cas is more than family. He's in love with Castel. And he'll discover this in season 8.

Remember Me

When Meg appears, Dean is worried she can tell the truth about Emmanuel's true identity, but it isn't just that... He really gets jealous...

This scene is a classic but check out Dean's facial expression, he IS jealous. He remembers Castiel kissed her. And he remembers she was flirting with him, just like now. This confirm that if he was jealous of Meg, who get a hot kiss from CAS, how jealous he had felt for Daphne? Who actually was Emmanuel/Castiel's wife? Is just logic, my friends. Beacuse being a wife gets more benefits that just a kiss... Well we don't actually know if Emmanuel and her... You know what I mean, but Dean can imagine that they were a real couple... Ergo, yes. Dean was jealous of Daphne too.

Now... Let's talk about that scene that always makes me sigh... Damn...

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: This silence is very uncomfortable. Is there something I should know?

MEG: I don't know. Dean?

DEAN: No. Meg has that effect. Awkward. You know?

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: That must be difficult for you.

MEG: Dean's making a joke, Emmanuel.

I wanted to put the previous dialogue to give context... I think this is one of my fav angsty Destiel looks watching when he's not watching.

Each time I see it, my heart beats fast. Beacuse... This is Emmanuel, right? But Emmanuel is behaving like old Cas, not understanding the joke. Being literal and all of that. And he even chuckled a little when Meg explained to him it was a joke... So... Look at Dean... He's side eyeing him... Because that's his Cas, the clueless, and cute Cas. And I'm certainly sure this is one of the things he missed of him. The clueless and cute angel. I'm sure is one of the most beautiful and innocent characteristics of CAS that enchanted Dean. So... He watched him, secretly, in silence, Cas is there... But he doesn't remember. He doesn't remember him. He missed him, besides the pain of his betrayal, and the rage that doesn't let him forgive him easily... Besides of that... He missed him. His Cas. That's the look, a sad, longing, and melancholic look in Dean's face.

Then... It was time for Revelations...

EMMANUEL/CASTIEL: Why wouldn't you tell me? Being an angel – it sounds pleasant.

DEAN: It's not, trust me. It's bloody, it's corrupt. It's not pleasant.

Dean was protecting him? Trying not to loose Cas by telling him the truth? He needed him to heal his brother, so... It could be. But it was also true that... Knowing what he had done... Will be devastating for the angel. Dean knew it. Maybe he was trying to protect him.

MEG: He would know. You used to fight together. 

Meg said it, they were bestest friends, Emmanuel is in awe, and immediately he asks Am I Cas? And ashamed because he can't remember Dean, he averted his eyes to the ground. But those words are like dagas in Dean's heart. He doesn't remember him.

I understand why you did what you did

When Cas went to smite those demons, he began to recover his memories, and most of them were of Dean. When he comes back, he's puzzled, because he doesn't know why is he alive and the whole Godstiel mess kicked him hard, and most of all... Because he knew Dean's words in the car, full of anger and resentment, and pain were for him. He knows Dean can't forgive him. That's the worst for him.

So he tries to run away...

CASTIEL: What I did. What I became. Why didn't you tell me?

DEAN: Because Sam is dying in there.

CASTIEL: Because of me. Everything. All these people. I shouldn't be here.

The guilt in Case is huge, and Dean's words are knives for his heart.

DEAN: If you remember, then you know you did the best you could at the time.

This could be desperation because the only hope to save his brother was running away, but it also is because Dean didn't want to lose Castiel again. So, he threw this desperate quote, is kind of what his brain maybe was telling him the whole time to help him forgive Cas.

CASTIEL: Don't defend me. Do you have any idea the death toll in Heaven? On Earth?

Castiel's regrets and guilt again.

CASTIEL: We didn't part friends, Dean.

DEAN: So what?

Castiel recalls, he tried to fix things, but he couldn't, he couldn't apologize or even make Dean to forgive him. He remembers the break up of their friendship.

But Dean is willing to forget all of that, he needs him now, and he doesn't want to lose him. Is like what Cas did, it doesn't matter anymore, because... He doesn't want Cas to go away from him again.

CASTIEL: I deserved to die. Now, I can't possibly fix it... So why did I even walk out of that river?

That's the idea will remain in Castiel's mind for a long time from now. He thinks he deserves the biggest of the punishment. Death. For what he did. He killed angels, innocent people, he broke Sam's mind wall and he betrayed Dean.

DEAN: Maybe to fix it. Wait.

Dean wants him to know this could be a second chance for them.

And then...

Dean kept Castiel's trenchcoat with him, he even moved from car to car. Why? Because he couldn't forget him. Because he needed to remember h. Because he was CAS, more than just family to him, and because (from the deleted dialogue) he felt inside he'll be back... Inside of his heart... Because he couldn't believe that was the end for them, their special friendship or wherever that was. It couldn't end like that.

And Cas is amazed, look at his face. He can't believe Dean kept that for him. And he can't say no to him. As always. His human weakness.

To Conclude:

This episode is huge in Destiel content. Each dialogue and facia expression in Case and Dean talks about the pain and angst, recalling their break up, and trying to fix something, little by little.

Dean was heartbroken, because he did find Cas, but he couldn't talk with him because he didn't remember him.

Dean missed Cas badly, and when he saw the angel was about to leave, he tried to convince not to go away again from him.

When Dean gave him back his trenchcoat, Cas couldn't say no. And we couldn't believe the hunter had kept the trenchcoat all this time! 😱

I hope you like this chronicle, it was very large!

See you in the next one!

Tagging @metafest @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname

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If you want to read the previous metas from season 7, here are the links... Vol. XXV, XXVI y XXVII

Buenos Aires September 12nd 2019 1:46 AM