#i like that he doesn't gaf abt how his kills look to people. like blood fountain for you lol

[bumpscosity]

finally watched nightmare on elm street i didn't know freddy was a child predator i thought he just killed people

[lavellane]

spare some facts about cillian? 👐 i think "retconning" ocs and making new ones is such a fascinating process

oh anon im so sorry i didnt see this wth !!! thank u so much for asking abt my mans ive been so excited to introduce him and talk abt him over the last couple days !

like i said before cillian is heavily inspired by my last hawke, emeraude, mainly in that they're both half elven. cillian is technically bethany & carver's half brother, and not related to leandra by blood. he was malcolm's first child with an antivan elf who ran away to ferelden (disclaimer i havent played mota and im a lil rusty on the lore so this could still be up for changing lol). she died when cillian was about 2, so he doesn't remember her much and as far as he's concerned leandra is his real mother

all he has of his mother is an old green onyx pendant of hers which he wears under his clothes. he doesn't like letting people seeing it including his fam bc he doesn't want them to think they aren't "enough" for him if that makes sense

he's a rogue! tossing up between shadow & assassin but def another dual wielder like elspeth.

he's a very talented painter as well! though he doesn't do it a lot because after his father's death he became the main breadwinner and he felt obligated to put his energy into more practical stuff. so when he was doing crimes he mainly worked whatever capentry jobs he could find. after act 1 when he comes into the amell wealth he begins painting again.

he and carver both fought at ostagar, and cillian nearly died. the iconic red slash hawke usually has is, in cillian's case, a keloid scar from a darkspawn blade that nearly took his damn nose off :/ that, plus carver's death, plus just the horror of the blight itself and losing his home, TRULY traumatized tf out of him and when he does begin painting again, the blight is a strong inspiration for him. he finds a new appreciate for nature, flowers and plantlife, untainted by the blight. he also misses the forests of ferelden and it takes him a while to get acquainted with city life.

he's always had the lifelong nickname ciller like. like killer lol. it started innocently enough but when he got into his shadier line of work it really stuck. ironically varric is the ONLY person (with anders later) who doesn't use that name, because he notices straight away how uncomfortable and unhappy it makes him. varric just calls him hawke :)

he's very self conscious of his elven heritage. for most of his life he hides the tips of his ears under his hair, until about act 3 when he's accumulated enough power and cynicism confidence to not really gaf anymore.

he's primarily a blue!hawke, although it's a bit murky especially as he becomes more of a mythical figure to kirkwall and less of a person. he's also very reserved and likes hiding vulnerability behind humor. so with a few exceptions most of his friends think of him as a purple hawke, whereas the city sees him as red. at his core though, he's very gentle, thoughtful and selfless to a fault. he can be a complete pushover and really doesn't know how to say no to people, because he's so desperate for love and approval and acceptance. being a half-brother and also being half elven has always made him feel a bit like an outsider everywhere he went, and he compensates by doing the MOST for people who arguably dont deserve it.

speaking of that, cillian is an anders-mancer like i said the other day. after the chantry mess cillian is so broken up over it, but he forgives anders anyway and continues to protect him. he does that by lying and telling everybody that he killed anders so that nobody will look for him. varric and isabela are the only two who know the truth, and subsequently the name "ciller" inevitably sticks even though its. literally not true :(

sorry this was so lengthy but i have so much to say abt him and im thankful that you asked! i havent played da2 in years and this is actually gonna be my first full replay, so if there are any lore issues i'll get around to adjusting them eventually