#i know what 'my immortal' is despite being a literal baby when it was published

[archibald-de-la-pluiepluie]

Internet history is really fascinating to me, because on the one hand people are going around solving old mysteries by digging up forums and seeking winesses and explaining where wierd old internet traditions come from, and it feels like archeology in the sense that it uncovers the early days of a whole new era (if you can say there is an era of the internet), with most of it happening before i could even understand that i do actually have hands, and that objects do not cease to exist because they left my field of vision, but on the other hand most of the people i am around can just remember it happening. Like i barely remember when youtube didn't have ads and every video was ridden with little colourful notes, and my mom just remembers. Playing pong. And getting acces to the internet. This shit is just wild to me

[kinkymagnus]

thoughts on alec? since this is mainly a magnus blog i guess i'm curious.

kfjlkfgjd thanks for resending sorry tumblr’s a bitch ily

eh i feel like generally i talk mostly about magnus bc Every Other Blog (not literally obviously but like, in general) talks about Only Alec just like…..24/7

so while i like him fine, he’s like, mostly Magnus’s Love Interest on my blog lghjflgkhjfgh but honestly just generally while i do like him i honestly don’t find him that….interesting, individually, i guess? i mean he’s not quite boring, but he’s not a character i really relate to

so the reason i don’t really write alec-centric stuff is like. 1. i just don’t find him as interesting (although i’ve had a few ideas, they’ll likely never be published thanks to…) 2. Spite

aka the alec stans suck. the Alec Stans™ to be clear, the ones who suck, not everyone who likes alec. but like, yeah

anyway let’s not just talk salt and me being petty, despite alec being not my fave i can afford to answer one (1) ask without my entire blog crumbling down and revealing i’ve been an alec stan this whole time without me even knowing it

ok so alec headcanons i guess

1. alec was a chatty kid. not what you’d think, right? but then like, he was taking care of izzy, bc she’s his baby sister and Protective, and jace wasn’t really the type to listen to him. like, ever. alec would suddenly realize jace hadn’t been listening the whole time pretty much every time he tried to have a conversation with him or talk about things he was interested in, even when he listened when jace talked about his latest crush or whatever he was interested in. alec started abruptly going quiet before his sentence was finished, and jace didn’t seem to notice or was just like oh good you’re finally done talking, here’s what i was gonna say. eventually alec gives up. he still talks to izzy but she’s so little it’s a lot slower paced and he usually pays more attention to her than what he wants to say bc Baby Sister. by the time izzy’s old enough to like, properly, hold a conversation (she is also pretty chatty) alec’s already gone a lot quieter. by the time we see him, he basically doesn’t initiate conversation on things he’s interested in that aren’t work-related. he does still sometimes talk to izzy, but it’s hard to get the words out and get everything sounding right, so he gets annoyed with himself. it doesn’t come as easy anymore.

and not to show my magnus stan roots but magnus is kind of similar, albeit way less clear cut, he tends to ramble and talk a lot about his special interests only to shut himself up when he realizes he’s definitely boring whoever he’s talking to (he isn’t, necessarily, but after enough times being told to shut up when you get excited you believe everyone wants you to shut up.) and then he was trying to keep up the whole classy unaffected stylish “def not an adorkable disaster bi nerd, i am dangerous deadly unaffected lothario man who has never even heard of star trek or whatever” facade, and rambling about whatever interested him didn’t really fit that. so he retreated more into himself, too. he did have his friends to talk to, but catarina is so busy and he doesn’t want to bother her and raphael doesn’t want to hear his foolish old dad ramble on, does he, and ragnor–he’d always put up with magnus’s babble, and listened, but magnus felt like he was boring him and then ragnor was–well.

anyway so to united these, then, they met each other. and it takes a while, but they get comfortable with each other. magnus goes on a long ramble about a potion he’s been trying to get just right and then cuts himself off, embarrassed, and apologizes for probably boring alec, and alec’s like what? no, that was really interesting, i was listening, can you explain the thing with the mandrake root? and magnus is like…oh.. (also side note: magnus is incredibly cute when rambling about things he’s interested in, he waves his hands a lot and his eyes are all excited and warm and he’s so lively, and clearly passionate, that it’s engaging and pulls you in. like a really good professor. and sometimes he starts talking about something way above most people’s heads without realizing how Smart he is, but if you ask him to clarify he’s like, totally non-condescending and explains it in creative and understandable way????? sorry im in love with adhd magnus thanks to someone anyway)

and then vice versa, alec slowly feels more comfortable talking about things that interest him, like a book he’s been reading and how it’s so fucking stupid the heroine went for the “blonde bad boy” when he’s such a dick to her, or whatever, like it starts as an angry rant about something but before he can cut himself off he realizes magnus is listening. like, actually listening. and like, if it’s appropriate, magnus will ask questions, engage in what alec’s talking about, and alec finds himself getting better at putting to words what he means and magnus is never mean about it, always patient and understanding

2. as a kid alec read romance novels. cheesy shitty fun romance novels. especially the ones that are like, written by women (or better, queer people, but that’s later) and aren’t weird? you know what i mean? and he loved them. romance was something young alec dreamed of a lot, even if he tried to ignore how he preferred tall, dark, and handsome to the main character, or the kind man the heroine fell in love with to the heroine herself. he hid trashy romance novels like most teen boys his age (including jace) hid porn magazines or whatever. he eventually maybe found some queer lit, but he didn’t dare to bring those back to the institute, instead choosing to go to the library the few times he had free time to sneak out (aka when he wasn’t working, sleeping, training, or watching izzy and jaces’ backs when they snuck out to clubs and shit.

also: 3. also i stand by the fact that alec wasn’t in denial about being gay. he wasn’t repressed, he knew exactly what he wanted and who he was, he just didn’t think it was possible for him to be with a man and be happy. 

4. alec isn’t a sweet innocent baby boy!!!! he’s seen porn, he knows how sex works, he’s masturbated, and honestly i know the show said otherwise but i find it hard to believe he never once fooled around even a little bit. just a little bit. no actual dating? not hard to believe at all. even being a “virgin” despite how outdated and terrible the concept is, not unbelievable. plenty of “normal” people reach college-age without ever having had sex, let alone shadowhunters raised to be demon-fighting soldiers. but like. look. he has the Energy. alec….Alec Fucks. also just something about the whole like, his siblings are always sneaking off to clubs and he follows them to watch their backs (is this canon or just common fanon? i honestly don’t remember) just screams to me hey, he may or may not have made out with an adventurous seelie or a mundane with eyes. or maybe a blowjob or a handjob, who knows. i’m JUST SAYING. i know this isn’t canon but i don’t care. alec lightwood has seen a dick

5. alec is ridiculously protective of people he loves. especially family (both in the sense of literal family like izzy, and family in the sense of “making your own family” like magnus) like he’d kill for them, he’d die for them, he’d live forever for them,

6. alec can and will become immortal for magnus. and not just literally only for magnus, for himself as well–like he doesn’t have to spend the rest of his life being a tool for the clave, he can work for better relations between downworlders and shadowhunters, and like accords that aren’t shitty, and he can be more than just another soldier or even head of the institute, he can be more and have time to actually spend time on himself, like it doesn’t have to be training-work-protect his siblings-sleep-training, and then one day he gets married and has kids and dies. he can actually experience the world, do things he enjoys, spend time with his husband, and most of all, he can spend the rest of his life with magnus bane, the love of his life, his husband, someone he loves so much. he can make sure magnus’s heart doesn’t get broken again by falling in love only to lose him. they get their happy ending, you know???? we stan

7. alec would be a great dad i dont know what to tell you he just would be 

8. one of the first kinks alec realized he really had like. with magnus. was office sex. yes im a slut what about it

this is bc he was minding his own business, doing paperwork at his desk, and magnus maybe sent a flirty text and alec was like mm i want to fuck him right now. and then he was staring at his desk thinking mm i want to bend him over this desk, sweep all this paper off the desk and rip off his clothes, take off his panties last and then lick his pussy until he’s begging for me to fuck him then press his chest down against the desk and fuck him until he screams. maybe i could tie his wrists behind his back with a tie. like i’m his boss? oh my god magnus in a secretary outfit. shit. he gets no work done that day. it’s just a rabbit hole of one thought to another until he’s like. sitting there hard and unable to focus on his work bc the mental image of magnus bent over in a skirt over his desk keeps playing his mind and he doesn’t want to do this paperwork he’d much rather be doing his husband.

9. alec loves making out with magnus on the couch like they’re just chilling and watching a movie and cuddling and alec loves to pull magnus into his arms and just make out. like literally not even “this ends in sex and gets hot and heavy” literally just magnus in his arms. and they kiss a lot. it’s soft and warm and relaxing tbh

10. magnus!!! and alec!!! cuddling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they both love it!!!!!! they’re both lowkey touch-starved!!!!!!

11. alec’s a dom top and that’s that my dudes

[durenjtmusings]

12.10 Fan Appreciation post

Annnd here I am again, providing a recap of @elizabethrobertajones  wonderful

12x10 watching notes

While last time it was because her notes just tickled the life out of me, this time it is because I read her meta AFTER so may others - and I think she managed to capture almost all of the things so many of us are saying about this last episode. So this time it isn’t so much all the “funny bits”  - although those are in there too - but because reading through her highlights nicely aggregates what I’m seeing as almost everyone’s responses to the show. THIS time, I’m using her play by play to add all MY meta about watching, and appreciating, the fandom...appreciating this episode.

Read on for my play by play fandom meta of @elizabethrobertajones play by play of SPN 12.10 (warning metric 1/4 ton of spoilers).

{Again, my comments are bracketed in and in italics}

Weirdly specific but excellent trope: immortal black ladies who have terrible impulse control around arcades. I’m going to be so sad when Lily kills her. {STOP WRITING COOL, POWERFUL WOC AND THEN KILLING THEM OFF}

[kind of sad we already know she’s called Lily because even though Lily Sunder is an incredible name, I wanted to call her Eyepatch Lady and I don’t have to] {We all really liked Lily and the eyepatch was doing it for us and CHARLIE IN THE VIDEO GAME OMG the parallels}

I don’t like this new trend of Sam and Dean actually communicating and talking about their shit. This is awful. Can we go back to them not talking about anything? {SPN fandom culture shock - actual normal/healthy communication. We struggle to cope, but are LOVING the struggle.}

Dean is going to CRASH THE CAR. Sam’s breaking point is Dean literally rotating 180 degrees in his seat to talk back at Cas. :P {OMG this moment had us ALL arm flailing - CAS sass made Dean forget Baby! Cas is more important to Dean than BABY! *panic*}

Aaand the info about Benjamin and his vessel has officially murdered me, especially as he’s already dead. :< Angel/human friendships! *flails emotionally* *flops over and slowly slides off my chair* *resumes watching from the floor because of Cas staring at Benjamin’s wings* {”Friends” - OMG the Destiel meta exploded...more arm flailing}

“If I plan to do anything else stupid, I’ll let you know” - I honestly did not think it was possible to love Cas more than I already did but he keeps on proving me wrong. {Cas sass. At. Dean. It was a thing this episode. A thing of beauty.}

Cas is catching up on what feels like a 3 year backlog of angry squinting {LOLOLOLOL - I didn’t realize this until she pointed it out. But oh yeah, squinting sass.}

Ahahaha Sam no. (Please keep Sam-ing like this. You are the Sam I love so very much :P) {So done Sam was so done repeatedly in this episode. LOTS of Sam as 3rd wheel/peacemaker commentary from all of us.}

“My friends who don’t listen very well” *Dean smirks at Cas* Okay, but I’m taking a screencap of that to use as like, a phone background or something. {OMG that smirk, and the three-men-on-a-bench scene overall...collective sigh and massive giffing.}

Well, home will still be very snarky and passive aggressive when he lives there but at least it will feel like HIS snarky passive-aggressive hunter-filled home. {I LOVE this description of the bunker. And we all cheered Cas clearly sticking around in the bunker - despite the PA fighting with Dean.}

Not surprisingly, Ishim then gets attacked and lightly stabbed. (that was a pun. Because angels bleed light - I’ll show myself out) {no, no, I LIKE puns...don’t stop}

idk how the casting went for this but it was probably “can you do Cas’s Eyebrow” {LOLOL  Lots of love for this actress and the wardrobe dept.’s decisions.}

Ishim just confirmed all the spec that this is a human marrying an angel and I’m contemplating going out to stand in the rain and shriek into the sky {snip}. Rain is great, when you need to shriek :P {Yeah, LOTS of happy meta/speculation over angel marriage in this episode.}

It’s times like this I remember the translation to the angel tablet is just sitting in the bunker in a language Cas can read and I need to go shriek in the rain some more {I KNOW right? I mean who says that nephilim are inherently BAD? Is it even ON the tablet? Or was it just some Admin angel’s stupid human-hating rules?}

I think it’s stopped raining so if I need to shriek I don’t know where to go {pat, pat.}

Sam you fucking third wheel master level dork. He’s been mediating so many fights that even when he’s in the middle of one as a participant he takes on this role :P {This has been a favorite gifset  -  I’ve seen it, and enjoyed it, repeatedly. Oh, and I’m going to use “master-level dork” in conversation as soon as possible.}

*looks around for something to scream into* *picks Mittens’s chat bubble since the sky is not in the right setting* {Poor Mittens - but don’t worry, she can take it; she is a scary fierce Nazghul looking entity (wearing favored hand coverings)}

angel love triangle drama is so tense. {how does that sentence even happen much less make sense - ah, the wonders of the SPN Universe}

Heh, Sam’s being left with Lily and Dean goes to check on Cas. What a wild surprise. {djtmusings fanfic/meta prompt - If SAM had gone to Cas instead, would Isham have threatened to cut HIM out? And would Sam have used the angel sigil? Discuss.}

I did the “AAH OTP INTERACTING” fist pump when Dean rushed over to Cas all urgent and worried, and now Dean’s just… like. Holding Cas. Help. I think I dislocated a finger making frantic handwaving :P - My arm legit really hurts. {Yeah, that was something of a medical epidemic in fandom...}

HOLY CRAP then Dean picks CAS over banishing Ishim when he shows Cas is Dean’s weakness too i ...am probably burning my dinner in the oven {Ditto fandom - although the meal varied around the globe}

LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL BLOODSTAINED SON {Yes. Let’s.}

“I’m not mad I’m worried” Oh man all this stuff in the main text sucks because I deduced this back at the start through clever analysis of their dialogue and now what I can tell from this line is that… Dean is worried about Cas. {Ha, ha, joke’s on you, the writers chose NOT to be subtextual - more OMG actual communicating and we all slid out of our chairs into puddles.}

Can’t believe Dean and Cas are married. {Said every. fan. on. my. dash.}

Bonus - Steve Yocky love  from the fandom: @elizabethrobertajones:  “ tl;dr Yockey owes me dinner “ @grey2510: Kudos to Steve Yockey. Well done, sir. @randomdestielfangirl: And before we proceed, Steve Yockey… Marry me @mittensmorgul: *posts an ask with “ Steve yockey's  writing healed me “ and a Julie Andrews dancing the hills are alive gif with # steve Yockey appreciation blog* @thevioletcaptain: “...it’s clear that character is definitely Yockey’s thing." @dorkilysoulless: I think we can trust Yockey with canon, guys.   @procasdeanating: Thank you, Mr. Yockey, for using that very specific term {Friends} again. @formidablepassion: My dudes, I think…I think Steve Yockey might be a Wincestiel shipper. [With 3 men and bench scene gif] @waywardpsych-o: Petition for Steve Yockey to write every episode of Supernatural from now on until forever. @bbycas: But actually did someone screw up and publish Steve Yockey’s secret fan-fiction as the episode script by accident or @theslaughteredpanda: Can someone find me Steve Yockey, I wanna give him a giantass hug and millions of kisses Thank you, Sir. Thank you …so many. @the-faerie-circle: CAN WE KEEP STEVE YOCKEY FOREVER AND EVER PLEASE AND THANK YOU {and someone said something like “and can someone please tell me who’s been slipping Steve Yockey 20′s because I want in on that action” but I can’t find it now.}