#i kinda just gave up and now i'm just mindlessly sitting there at the appointments for only 10 minutes being being told that i can leave

[honey-skulls]

HUGE VENT

I'm sorry but i need to get this out, just please don't worry too much or take anything personally/gen

My routine these last two weeeks has been:

-Wake up at my 10 am alarm and spend the whole day in bed, mentally and physically exhausted, brain fog and no motivation for anything, only getting up to eat, having to wait for the "food time" hours to roll around that my therapist gave me because I'm not allowed to eat outside of those hours and if I'm hungry but missed the last food time then too bad, struggling to stay awake because again I'm not allowed to sleep out of the "sleep hours" she gave me and that includes naps, excitedly waiting for 21h30/22h to roll around so i can finally sleep

-Spend the evening mentally screaming in my mind because, while my body is still just as physically exhausted, my mind is suddenly sharp and full of ideas and motivation, but i'm still too tired to get up and draw

-Then spend midnight and onward rolling around in bed, hot and bored out of my mind because my physical tiredness also vanished, but i'm not allowed to get up and draw because it's "sleep hours" and i need to reschedule my body, and end up falling asleep at around 5 am

I'm totally not slowly loosing my mind 😃👍

Edit: Oh also the constant noise in my ears has gotten worse, i don't know what silence is anymore

Silence is actually worse than loud rooms

It's driving me insane

It's so loud

[pastel-c4rtmansz]

requested by: @superyokaigamer

PREMISE: YOU ARE SHELLEY'S BEST FRIEND VISITING THE FARM. SHELLEY IS AT A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT WITH SHARRON AND STAN IS OUT WITH HIS FRIENDS SO IT'S JUST YOU, RANDY, AND TOWELIE FOR A LITTLE WHILE. 

Y/N walked towards the farm house's door at a fast pace looking down at theirs and Shelley's messages. 

Y/N: when r u gonna be back at ur house? im at ur door rn lmao

Shelley: I'm sorry itll probably take about an hour im doing a physical exam you can just sit on the couch. my dad may be annoying tho lmao

Y/N: ugh okay

Y/N stepped in the house, slipping off their black shoes. They sat on the couch mindlessly scrolling through Insta when a blue towel with blood shot eyes came up to them.

"Hey wanna get high?" It asked. 

"Huh? What?" Y/N gave it a confused look.

"I'm Towelie, follow me."

"Uh okay…" Y/N reluctantly followed.

Towelie grabbed their semi sweaty hand and brought them out to the weed testing room. 

Y/N heard a voice they recognized, none other than Randy Marsh, "Did you find a new test subject already, Towelie?" He asked, his back turned to the both of them while he stayed focused on his new weed blend. "Sure did." Towelie piped up. "Perfect, I really need someone to test this new strain for me. We're not letting Stan's friend's family across the street sell more than us." Randy put the finishing touches on the strand and turned around.

Pleasantly surprised at the person Towelie brought over, Randy spoke cheerfully, "Oh! Y/N, nice to see you! I didn't know you liked to smoke. Honestly it's refreshing to see kids like you. Nowadays everyone's been using those pussy vape sticks. I'm honored to show you some true weed, Some Tegridy.." He switched to a southern accent halfway through his mini speech. 

"Hi Mr. Marsh, it's good to see you again… I didn't exactly know I'd be smoking but I'm always 100% down for getting high!" They giggled. "Well that's great! come here, I have 3 joints all rolled up for us already." 

Taking a few steps closer, Y/N slipped their phone in their pocket and took the joint Randy offered them. Of course, Towelie took one as well. 

"Alright, let's light up guys." Towelie announced.

They all took turns lighting their joints. 

Y/N took a slow and long hit. The type that you still feel in your lungs even minutes after you exhale. "Mm that's good" Y/N closed their eyes and sat down on the floor immediately feeling the effects. "You can say that again." Towelie stood next to them now at eye level.

"I don't want you sitting on the floor, you're a guest Y/N. Come on, let's go back inside and sit on the couch." Randy grabbed their limp hands helping them up. 

After being seated for around 40 minutes the three heard the door open. 

"WHAT THE FUCK DAD I HATE YOU STOP STEALING ALL OF MY FRIENDS" Shelley yelled. 

"Now Shelley I know you have a weed problem but your dear friend Y/N wanted to try some of the new strain." 

Y/N gave a thumbs up in response. 

"Whatever, c'mon Y/N, we're going to my room." Shelley pulled Y/N off the couch.

A few hours passed and Y/N was about to leave, before they could make it out of the house though Randy and Towelie stopped them. "Come over again sometime?" Towelie asked. Y/N nodded and smiled then left out the door.

(SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG AND SORRY ITS KINDA SHORT :/)