#i just wanted to insert that part in BC i feel like he'd be genuinely curious about whether him responding to it differently was something-

[mad-hunts]

“How many shots would it take for you to sleep with Eliza?"

whenever he was asked this question once more, barton looked up from the paperwork he was sorting through and rose an eyebrow at the forthrightness of it. but seemingly not in a bad way — as a playful smile spread across his lips soon after, a pale hand releasing its grip upon one of the papers underneath him. barton then crossed one leg over the other and rested his hands in his lap, which made him look a little bit like this:

❝ hmm... how many shots would it take for me to sleep with eliza? well, that's an easy question, with an even easier answer. i'd do it completely sober because i know her — and she's the nicest, as well as most beautiful woman i know. ❞ barton put extra emphasis on the compliments he paid to eliza as he nodded to further insist that this was the case. the doctor then hummed underneath his breath, before deciding to draw something on his phone. holding it up once he was finished then revealed that barton drew the two of them with their hearts (metaphorically) connected like this:

❝ plus, we're like this, you know? i feel like she understands me. i mean, really understands me, and i really understand her... so why wouldn't i be willing to sleep with her when the act itself makes two people more close than ever? ❞ barton gestured at the drawing before placing it down and a glint of curiosity formed in his eyes before he tilted his head. the doctor clasped his hands together in front of himself, before saying, ❝ eliza's also my girlfriend so i don't think it'd be a very good sign if i said it'd take me any shots to be intimate with her. but i'm curious, now: did you expect me to approach this differently? ❞

[callmehere-iwillappear]

rec list (last updated: 10/22/23)

aka 'if you liked [cmh] you might also like [insert other really good fic here]' bc there are So Many amazing fics out there good lird

few things. first off if you see a disaster twins bias no you don't. second i tried to find all the authors' tumblrs but there were some i couldn't - if you know any of the ones i missed let me know!

aaand third, there are just. SO many good fics i ended up splitting things up. this is the rec post for multi chapter fics, here's the one shot rec post

Multichapter Fics

Complete

A Twin Thing (@minumi-chan)

Four times Donatello rejects Leo's notion of them being twins, and the once (and future) time he embraces it.

GOD THE TWINS EVER.... funny in parts but also hurts in the best possible way and thankfully has a happy ending to soothe the pain. i literally love them so much

Because We Could Not Stop For Death (@turtleinsoup)

After Leo dies, Donnie builds an android of his twin. After Leo dies, he comes back. He does. And Donnie will not ever let him go again.

very very very very VERY heavy please mind the warnings but god. god. another take on the 'leo dies in the prison dimension' concept that btw WILL make you cry. like a lot. absolutely incredible study of grief. i am never going to be the same person after reading this

coming right on back for you (@taizi)

Rise!Mikey’s portal in the prison dimension takes Leo a little bit farther than he meant for it to. 12!Mikey finds a familiar-looking stranger.

soooo full disclosure i haven't actually watched 2012 tmnt. that said even without that, this fic rules. incredibly soft and heartwarming. i love them

Corrupted Upgrade (@dandylovesturtles)

His brothers think they don't need him anymore? Well, fine. He doesn't need them either. The old Donatello is gone. He'll build a new one. One that will make them regret they ever threw him aside. Building things is what he's good at, after all.

i can't say too much without spoiling the twist, but oh MAN guys it's real good. come get your donnie hurt/comfort juice rn. also for a hurt/comfort fic it has NO RIGHT being so funny so often

Dimensions Apart & Home Again

"Who said I'm hiding?" Leo scoffs. Normally he wouldn't take such a sharp tone, but he's tired and not in the mood for what he feels to be an interrogation in his own bedroom. "You all know where I am. I live here, remember?" “Yeah, very funny. And you know where we live. But nobody's seen you for two weeks.”

ooohhh post movie hurt/comfort my beloved... leo is isolating and donnie kicks his ass. metaphorically. mostly. meanwhile raph and mikey are also having a certified Bad Time but it's okay they all get comfort by the end

Havoc, Thy Name is Donnie

Donnie accidentally turns himself into a child while experimenting with mystic power. It's cute until Donnie gets his hands on his older self's tech and then it's really uncute and Leo and S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. are having a heart attack.

child donnie is an absolute MENACE and it's INCREDIBLE. terrorizes leo. terrorizes shelldon. terrorizes some random criminals. terrorizes april. terrorizes draxum. all in the course of a single day. 12/10

how to get very good at juggling (@radishhqueen)

The Krang invasion put a couple of things in perspective for April. One of them was how much she wanted her parents to meet the Hamatos. The only difficult part is…getting her parents to meet the Hamatos.

the turtles meet april's parents! it goes... about as well as can be expected. REALLY good april centric post movie fic

little kid with a big death wish (@remedyturtles)

Leo's mind rebelled against the sensation. The heaviness burst into awareness, body, limbs, lungs, blinking. The middle distance he'd apparently been staring in focused. Leo was awake. Leo was aware. Leo was alive. Being alive wasn't something he thought he'd be.

genuinely don't think i could ever recommend this fic enough. mind the warnings as it does get very heavy but. god. idk how to express how much this fic means to me in just a few sentences but like. you'll understand if you read it (also for. an actual summary: post movie recovery fic with a side of extra leo)

Nothing Haunts Us (like the things we don't say)

The boys learn the hard way that truths can hurt. Well, some of them.

truth spellllll you love to see it! lotta post movie angst + some good comfort at the end + bonus the boys actually being emotionally vulnerable and talking about their issues (even if it's not 100% by choice)

Trial and Error (@apatheticrobots)

Leo ends up in the past. This changes some things.

YES the healing (well. eventually).... big fan of the leos' dynamic in this one. also that One Scene (the one with the animatic. if you know you know) gives me goosebumps EVERY time good god

Unfinished business

When one dies leaving something undone, there's a belief, that they do not go gentle into that good night. They linger on until they've finished what they couldn't while alive. And for four turtles, that business is using the Poltergeist movie as inspiration.

bad future ending but make it HILARIOUS. tldr the future turtles haunt the SHIT out of the krang. that's all i'm giving you because that's all you should need. they fucking rick roll them. please

Use Only For Intended Purpose (me!)

That's probably not how mind melds are supposed to work.

sorry for reccing my own fic do you still love me /j BUT FR if you like post movie disaster twins hurt/comfort with a side of dream sharing. i got u

Where in the World is Neon Leon?

Leo practices portalling on his own. This is not a good idea for many, many reasons.

set over the course of the show + the movie! aka leo trying so so hard to be seen as reliable and getting incredibly fucked up over it. also making new friends

write this down on my headstone (it wasn't what i hoped for) (@bottledovercast)

it’s as he drifts listlessly through the cold-as-shit hellscape that leo’s willing to admit, maybe this wasn’t what raph meant. aka: i do not believe for one second that there were No Problems in between getting leo out of the prison dimension and the final scene of the movie.

i genuinely do not know how to do this one justice with words. it's written impeccably and the hurt/comfort is just. chefs kiss. please read it (+ has a sequel now that's also absolutely incredible!)

In progress

At My Worst (@teainthesnow)

Future Leo ends up back in time, stuck in the body of his younger self, who is still conscious but trapped within his mind.

genuinely LOVE this concept like there's a lot of (really good) future leo goes back in time fics but i'm pretty sure this is the only one i've read with them sharing a body? god the dynamic is. SO good. one of my fave future leo + present leo dynamics ever tbh. just. chefs kiss

I May Be Invisible, But I Still Look Good (@dandylovesturtles)

Leo is cursed by a mystic whatever thingy. But don't worry guys, he's totally got this! Getting back into his body? Easy peasy. (He hopes it will be easy peasy.)

will smith poses fellow ghost(ish) leo fic my beloved! ngl this one kinda has a special place in my heart so i May be biased BUT even aside from that it's just. so good. the premise is so interesting and it's written super well and in character and also i would like to give leo a hug PLEASE GOOD GOD

I'm Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now? (@tangledinink)

When Hamato Yoshi is presented with the chance to return to the surface with his sons and give them a 'normal' life as humans, he takes it. He didn't think that they would forget about that whole turtle thing. But it seems kind of too late to tell them now. Surely they won't find out any other way, right?

human au! ... kind of. actually brooches au but they THINK they're human which is fine until, y'know, it's not. currently in the 'not' part of the fic and it's just going really great for everyone! you love to see it

In Which Donnie and Leo Make Themselves Everyone Else's Problem in an NYC That Isn't Even Their Own

It was a huge mistake on the Kraang's part to kidnap the wrong half of the wrong set of brothers and leave behind two very worried twins. And not just any twins. The disaster twins.

another crossover with 12tmnt which. again i have not seen, but like. this fic is just. REALLY good. it's set pre movie so there's not that trauma, it's literally just the twins fucking the 12 kraang up and living up to their nickname while the 12 turtles (and rise mikey and raph) look on in horror

i think i would prefer the prison dimension (@purplecatghostposts)

Leo gets sent to the Kraang Apocalypse Future that he really didn’t want to think about. Future Leo, Mikey, and Donnie are absolutely baffled by him. Nobody is happy.

you've heard of future leo in the present, now get ready for: present leo in the future! he gets dragged into the apocalypse instead of getting pulled out of the prison dimension back to his brothers and boy he is, understandably, Not Thrilled!

Last Grain of Sand in the Hourglass (@last-hourglass)

The one where the Hamato family is freaking the fuck out, Leo is lost in the Prison Dimension, and a very-time-displaced Leonardo refuses to leave his younger self behind. (Oh, and there may be some mystic hauntings afoot. You know, the usual result of messing with the space-time continuum.)

future leo gets saved while present leo stays in the prison dimension! there's A Lot going on in this one and half of it is BIG spoilers but just. oh my god. this shit is SO well written i am eating it

Mikey's Jam-Packed, Guaranteed to Get Donnie's Memory Back, Friendship Tour!

Donnie wakes up without his memory one day and everyone panics. They're just going to have to jog his memory the old-fashioned way! Through the power of friendship! [And a small (I was wrong. A very large) degree of violence and shenanigans]

donnie gets amnesia and SO SO MANY shenanigans ensue. also a tiny bit of angst but it's fine

Minor Interference (@bambiraptorx)

The turtles accept Draxum's offer to train them. Little does he know that they're only going to use it mess with him.

haha draxum accidental dad moments... well okay not entirely just yet but he's getting there! the turtles are PEAK teenager literally just causing problems on purpose and it's incredible

Mutant Ninja Midlife Crisis (@mutantninjamidlifecrisis)

In the midst of attempting to make peace with his death at the hands of the Krang, Master Leonardo is suddenly yeeted over two decades into the past, courtesy of his little brother.

YEAAHHH another future leo fic! mans gets dropped into the past and IMMEDIATELY kidnapped and brainwashed so things are going great (it's fine he gets better. you know how it is)

odd man out (@threestripeslider)

The one where Future!Leo somehow managed to luck out on a one in a million mere millisecond chance of a freak glitch in the space-time continuum that sends him back into the present, where the Invasion has been successfully driven back. And it looks like it was a one-way ticket travel.

DAD FUTURE LEO MY BELOVED.... he really took one look at these kids and said is anyone else gonna give them a third (3) dad and did not wait for an answer. also big fan of casey's high school adventures LMAO

Power Up

Leo also gets healing hands like his 2k12 counterpart. Sadly, they end up backfiring on him. Who needs to know though?

leo taking 'it's not about me' to the extreme. good god please get this kid some therapy and self worth. the AGONIES

The Lemonade Leak (@turtleinsoup)

The one in which Leo can’t sleep without his swords, because there is a monster in his room, pretending to be Donnie.

oh man. oh MAN. legit one of my fave fics out there. i'm not usually a big thriller person but this one GETS ME + the way the author writes the different perspectives is just. chefs kiss. genuinely has me on the edge of my seat every single update

The Neon Void

Five years. It's been five years. Hamato Leonardo was back. But he was no longer who he once was.

krangified leo! ... sort of. absolutely delicious angst and also i want to rattle leo's brothers. TALK TO EACH OTHER

Three-Sided Coin (@leglessstreetlights)

Highly self-indulgent fic where I put Leo, Future!Leo, and TurtleTot!Leo in the same room until they hug

what the description says! room is a bit of a stretch and present leo is fresh out of the prison dimension So There's That. some really sweet moments in this one though. tiny leo my beloved

this year we lost our dear brother leonardo

The aftermath of the Krang, and of pulling Leo out of the portal. 90% comfort and silly banter.

this is a series not a single wip but i'm saying it counts because i love it a lot. hope this helps <3 yeah what it says on the tin. immediately post movie family hours you love to see it

Times Five

Leo gets struck by a mystic beam that splits him into five parts of himself; literally.

god the TWIST. still losing my mind over it. the whole thing honestly. lotta dealing with leo's complicated emotions about the invasion and himself, really really good tbh

Write Me Well, My Love, Write Me Weird

When stories start popping up on various media outlets of the Turtleman, New York Cities own personal cryptid, most of the world shrugged. To the citizens of New York? fear, excitement, adoration for this odd and lovable creature. Everyone is quick to share stories and memories of their encounters, much to lament of Turtleman's older brother.

leo and donnie get spotted by humans (more than once) and said humans post about it on social media, as humans tend to do. raph is Not Thrilled. angst (and eventual comfort) ensues

[creepling]

NSFW ALPHABET - THE RIDDLER/EDWARD NASHTON

a/n ! decided to try this myself,,, don't kill me bc i think my headcanons are gonna be different.

cw ! switch!ed/riddler, gn!reader-insert, NSFW - MINORS DNI !!

i definitely agree that he's a cuddler, he'd be so exhausted and need all the love he could get. but then his compulsions kick in and he'll feel icky from sweating and want a shower or relax in a bath. 9/10 you join him and he'll hug into you, so needy. his fave aftercare is when you wash his hair, loves the feeling of your fingers running through his hair.

B -  Body Part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

B -  Body Part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

i don't think ed likes anything about himself, especially when he is single. he's completely blackpilled and convinced himself no one loves him because (he thinks) he's ugly. but when he met you he had a little more confidence. whatever compliments you gave him he ran with it and decided that was his best features.

as for his partner, he's totally a titties man. and i mean that in a gender neutral way. this mf loves sucking nipples and rubbing anything that is squishy; whether that be boobs or pecks. he doesn't care about size, he just likes the touch and being coddled under them. can see him liking thighs too, gripping onto them while he gives you head.

C -  Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

i don't think he has a breeding kink per say, but he definitely hates it when cum gets messy. he likes to keep it contained, neat, yknow? whether that be cumming inside you or in your mouth, or in the dips of your stomach. he's so ashamed of it, but i can see him also liking the taste of his own cum. it turns him on sm when he finishes off in your mouth and you pull him into a kiss, gliding your cum-covered tongue over his.

D - Dirty Secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

this man is fucking nuts. in his own sexual realm he is one kinky motherfucker. he has probabally wanked off to every kink/fetish video you can think of, even if he's not into it. i can see him being the type of guy to masturbate just because he's bored (when he's single).

but the most explanatory secret he has is that everytime he succeeds in doing a riddler task, ed goes home and blows the biggest load ever. he thrives off his own success. the rush of pride he gets from being the riddler turns him on and makes him feel less shitty about himself. so, in a way, his dirty secret is he'll jerk himself off everytime he succeeds at something. and if he has a partner, this bleeds into a praise kink. this man just wants to be a genius at everything, he needs to be praised 24/7 bc of his crippling fear of failure.

E - Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

you gotta laugh. i genuinely do see him as a virgin, or at least a half-virgin. he's either never had sex and is completely touched starved or someone gave him a pity-blowjob in college and he's been chasing that high ever since. he has no idea what he's doing when he has proper sex for the first time. he gets so pent up and has all this energy but his execution is god-awful. on the other hand, he's a quick learner ;^)

you'll say stuff like "is that all you got? you're so fucking pathetic" and he gets so fucking hard when you insult him and he's so ashamed of it. he'll whine like a little bitch when you degrade him because all he wants is your approval. he's definitely a sub that strives to be a dom, i think after he loses his virginity and gives into his sub status he'll want to experiment more and try out dominance (especially as the riddler, but i'll get into that soon)

F - Favorite Position (this goes without saying)

as edward nashton, this man loves cowgirl. watching your body parts bounce as you ride him into oblivion. drives him absolutely nuts. you'll pin his thighs down to stop him from rutting and it makes him beg and whimper. overall though this man is an oral man, he gets so hard when you face-fuck him. pinned against a wall and let you use his mouth to please you. he just wants to make you feel good; gets so proud of himself when he makes you cum.

as the riddler however, doggy all the way. all that pent up energy he has he can take it out when he's on top. he'll prompt one leg up and have his boot right in front of your face as he drills into you. his thrusts are a little sloppy because even though he's being dom, he's still so needy and desperate and just wants to please you. he especially loves doggy when he lifts your face up to his and he breaths down your neck and whispers dirty shit into your ear.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

if you count riddles as humorous, then yes. you both love to tease each other with riddles; if you get the answer right, they'll continue to please you, etc. overall i think the riddler/edward is on the serious side, because they'll just bask in your body and be absolutely infatuated by it that no jokes come to mind; their mind is just full of smut.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

carpet matches the drapes i assume. i think if edward is single he'll not really bother with shaving, maybe take a pair of craft scissors to trim it down if it gets too wild. in a relationship though, he'll be all prim and proper. he's the type of guy to get a nice haircut before a date. even though his apartment is an absolute mess, i think ed is pretty intricate with his personal hygiene, since he grew up in an orphanage without much hot water and time to bathe so he doesn't take it for granted.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

the sexual aspect takes a little getting use to. i bet he googles things like "how to be good at sex" or tries to imitate porn. when he discovers none of that works, he either goes with what he's into or what you're into. commication is a big thing for him, since he has an obsession with knowing the truth. so if you like a certain fetish/kink and you're too embarrassed to tell him, he wants to know.

when in a relationship he has that mentality of "how am i with this person? i don't deserve them" so when he has the privilege of being able to rail you (or get railed) everynight, he definitely does not take it for granted.

the romantic aspect; borderlines on crazy (i mean, what did u expect?). like what he did for batman, he'll leave you valentine-like love cards with riddles and puns. just leaves you notes constantly. also his compliments and endearments are... a little different. he'll say things like "i can't stop staring at you" / "you're so gorgeous i'm gonna kms!!!!" he is completely infatuated with you. can also see him being the type to say "if i was a gremlin with no limbs and only spoke in latin would u still love me?" and if you said no he'd literally cry.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

impulsive wanker alert! yeah ed's got a lot of tension to release. although i think he'd also let himself pent up throughout the day so his release is more satisfy. DEFINITELY asks for permission to cum if he's in a relationship. would give you free reign to give him a handjob instead of masturbating, he'd feel like he was cheating on you if he touched himself sorta thing. and when you're not in the mood or you want to tease him he just endures it bc that little perv loves how worked up he gets.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

MASK KINK (x1000). this insecure little pumpkin pie loves fucking you in his riddler get-up. especially when he wants to be dominant. going full roleplay, when he's riddler, watching you be absolutely mesmerised in his change in confidence. he probs borderlines into breathplay too since that boi be PANTING when he has that mask on. loves it when you're being bratty and snarky, giving him excuses to grab your face, fuck you harder, say how naughty you are. "why can't you be good for me, huh? be good a slut for me."

without the riddler get up tho, he's just the complete opposite. so submissive, wanting to be praised and coddled by you. if you call him a 'good boy' he just melts. and he LOVES being overstimulated, his squirms and whines embarrass him but the complete euthoria he feels cancels it out.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

likes to be contained inside, not much of an outdoor person (bc he's such a hermit lol). when he's being dommed he likes to be comfortable, being surrounded in pillows and blankets on the bed or on the couch. if he's in the mood for roughness he loves being pinned against the wall, slamming his head back and scratching into the wallpaper when you give him a mind-blowing blowjob. or have his knees completely bruised from the hardwood floor when he's knelt down and obediant for you.

also likes to be indoors when a dom too. he'll give you the same treatment as he likes when he's subbing. he'd have the strength to lift you and fuck you against the wall.

if he was to ever do it anywhere other than his apartment/hotel room, he definitely has fantasies of railing you and eating you out in his accountant office. muffling your moans, or muffling his moans. but since he has to be lowkey in work, he'd never have the confidence to actually do that.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

honestly? anything. you could laugh and the tone of your laugh could give him a boner. overall i think your voice/lips can turn him on. he likes to admire your lips when you're talking, fully desperate for you to kiss him and throve your tongue down his throat. he'll just get a random hard on and you'll notice and say "you need help with that?" and he's all "yesyesyes, please, thankyou, ily." and that's him ready.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

y'all are gonna hate me for this, and i hate myself for it too, but i just don't think this man likes to be pegged. if he wants dicked down then sure he'll take the real thing. i just think his submissiveness is centered around worshipping your body. he wants you to have all the pleasure, not him. he justs wants his body to be used as a human flesh toy and that's enough to get him off. maybe if you ask him nicely . . .

when in the riddler costume (dom) he's not into daddy shit. he'd be like "why you calling me daddy? i'm the fucking riddler bitch." so yeah if you were to give him any dom pet name, he'd want you to call him the riddler. none of that beta shit, he'd say.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

if you were to ask this man where the clit, g-spot, etc was before losing his virginity, he'd have no idea. but like i said, he's a quick learner. finding your weak spot is the most satisfying riddle he's ever solved, hands down. prefers giving you head, but as the riddler he's parcial to face-fucking you now and then.

he'd absolute ravish you when giving head, having a mental note of your preferences and weak spots. he'll do the thing where he moans into you, the waves of his sounds mimicing a vibrator. and it'd drive you crazy. he'd do it subconsciously at first, because he can't hold in his moans, but once he picks up how much it sends you over the edge; he'd use it against you til the test of time.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

ed is needy and sloppy, his thrusts are rutty; short but quick. he loves his cock being deep into you as humanly possible, feeling every inch of you.

riddler is still sloppy, but more rough. again, loves being deep inside you, taking pauses inbetween to completely bury himself into you. when he's slow, his thrusts are still hard. when he goes fast, the bed is rattling.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he doesn't like to do them often, since he savours every sexual moment with you. but y'know, he's got a busy life, working a 9-5 and being the riddler and all. if he knows his neediness will get in the way of his work, he'll be agreeable to a quick release. "please, just 5 minutes, i need you so much. i promise i'll be quick"

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

i think he will be pretty set in his ways. would only try something out if he witnesses a technique that blows his mind. overall he'll just be "we do what i'm into, we do what you're into. that's enough"

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he may look weak, but this man has some stamina!! prefers to pent himself up rather than cum multiple times, just so the orgasm is better. but, if he ends up passing a few rounds, i think he'd last around 3 before passing out from exhaustion with a grin on his face.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

i think ed/riddler is more of a sexual attire/costume guy than a toy owner. likes his partner to wear cute/sexy clothes; definitely a sucker for thigh highs. toys though . . . idk. i think his pride would get in the way. he wants to make you cum, not some electric thing plugged into the wall. this mf would fr get jealous of an inanimate object.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

as a sub he is way too obedient to tease, if he ever did by accident he will apologise repeatedly and hate himself for it (but gladly let you punish him).

he gets more turned on when you tease him. both ed/riddler would love you riling him up by wearing skimpy clothes around the house, deliberately dropping something so you can pick it up and show your ass. leaning over him so your bare leg grazes over his crotch. would drive him absolutely insane.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he is so loud. as the riddler he at least has the advantage of the mask muffling his grunts, he'll groan in your ear so it doesn't echo throughout the room and bounce off the walls.

ed is hand clamped around his mouth, screaming type of loud. especially when you're edging him or if he's pented himself throughout the day, or for more than a day. his moans turning into manic giggles when the pleasure consumes him.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

two words. duct tape. i'll leave it to the imagination ;^)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

DAD BOD EDWARD. DAD BOD EDWARD. I'M ADVOCATING FOR IT AND YOU CANNOT STOP ME!! (it's basically canon anyways so) definitely had some meat on him pre-riddler. but then when he realised he's gotta be semi-strong if he wants to murder people, he starts working out a little. after some push-ups and cargo, his arms developed a little muscle, his shoulders got broader, but everything else looked the same physically.

not the hairiest guy, his body hair is blond. was never successful when it came to growing a beard, probs had a phase were he was insecure about that bc his 'baby-face' makes him less of a chad.

for the downstairs area however . . . i'm in the general smutty opinion that i think he's average size but got hella girth. again, he was really insecure about his size since he compared himself to corn, but when he seen how much he pleased you; it fuelled his ego to 100. you say stuff like "god you're stretching me out so much, eddie" it sends him to cloud nine.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

gonna be blunt here, but he is a needie slut. seems to constantly be aroused by you it's concerning.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

to around it all up, like i said in aftercare, i think ed favours aftercare and likes to have it in the shower. after the shower tho, he is so passing out on the bed, his arms wrapped around you.

[bbq-hawks-wings]

Hiya so idk if you still like doing these but I wanted to ask your opinion on how you think hawks would handle a true heart to heart conversation (just a true 1 on 1 with the real him) with a bestfriend/significant other just telling him how much they care for him and appreciate not just hawks but Keigo bc of how much he does for them. Do you think he'd get emotional? Embarrassed? Ridiculously happy? I think you understand his character quite well

This is more of a theoretical/characterization question than a self-insert fic request so I don't mind taking a swing at it. Still, I'll focus on the other person as a significant other because it's easier for my brain to wrap around - though an adequately close and trusted friend would likely get the same reaction. (Platonic soul mates definitely exist, IMHO.)

The first big question is how much does this person know about him? From what we know about him canonically it doesn't look like he really has any true friends or extended family to speak of, and he'd likely be hesitant and not truly ready for a romantic or otherwise truly personal relationship to begin with as far as canon goes. But, just to assume he does, how much do they know him and know about him?

If they don't know much, for example just kind of the level he lets Tokoyami and Endeavor see, I think he would receive that declaration of love well, fondly even; but it probably doesn't quite penetrate those deeper layers - makes him feel truly seen and accepted for who he really is. In his mind he's be more likely to file it away as "S/O thinks well of me, I can trust them" in a similar way he seems to log all his relationships. It's not that he doesn't recognize it as genuine or doesn't value it, just that he's got a face for them as much as he does everyone else even if he truly does love them for who they are (which I think would have to be the case in that kind of relationship - I genuinely don't see Player/Cavalier-Hawks as canon whatsoever).

If they knew everything, though - and I do mean everything? They know about his upbringing, the sense of duty attached to his identity, the fact that he likely doesn't make a distinction between Hawks and Keigo in his mind (maybe even that he more identifies as Hawks), the fear, the guilt, the feeling of helplessness, the ugly everything that he hides from even himself. If they bring that up - put it in clear words they don't just love him despite all of that, but that they love him with all of the baggage and damage because it's part of what made him into the person they love and that they want to stay with him as he grows and changes whatever that may be? That cuts deep. While situational context matters (when, how, and in what environment is this happening?) in as far as his outward reaction, I don't think it has a bearing on how much that would actually mean to him.

And speaking of situational context, let's say S/O stops everything to have this talk. The world doesn't exist outside of them in the moment. If he accepts that person as a safe space to let down his walls, I could see him crying. It could be this is the talk that makes that safe space click for the first time in his head. It depends on where he is emotionally because as emotional of a person as he is, he still feels the need to put on a brave face. Crying in front of someone - anyone, really - might actually be one of the scariest things he can think to do. Embarrassment and happiness are likely to be more natural knee-jerk reactions with him, but again it always comes down the context and depth of the relationship he has with that individual.

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This is that kind of hypothetical that really needs a fleshed-out second character and a personal history between them thoroughly set to really explore well. It doesn't happen all at once - certainly not with Hawks - and getting to those squishy, uncomfortable bits organically will take time and could even be a painful process. It also really depends on the particular dynamic the two of them have, in my opinion - sort of the way both or either of them process emotion and vocalizing what/how they feel. This kind of moment is more like the emotional climax that establishes the nature of their relationship moving forward from what has been building; and that build up can't be neglected, imo.

The Sword of Damocles is Swinging is a fic by @prince-liest that's on my to-read list as I've seen jt regarded as one of the best Hawks' character studies in fandom at the moment by trusted sources (and from what I've read/discussed of their opinions/observations of Hawks, I don't doubt it). Though I can't give it a "personal" recommendation on account of the whole "haven't actually read it myself" bit, I would say it doesn't hurt to check it out as well as dig into his character for yourself. Even my little halo of vocal mutuals don't always 100% agree on everything regarding Hawks, so by no means take any one person's opinion as gospel (besides maybe Horikoshi because, you know, theoretically he knows that character better than anyone).