#i just don't personally want to handle linux tech support for weird ancient legal tech)

[snarp]

I wrote this "How To Pick Out A Cheap Laptop In Early 2023" tutorial for my parents' law office; there's some task-specific stuff in there, but it may be useful for other people.

DON'T SPEND MORE THAN $500 - You can generally meet all of the guidelines below for under $400.

YOU NEED WINDOWS 10, NOT WINDOWS 11 - Avoid buying Windows 11 PCs or upgrading existing PCs to Windows 11. If a PC uses Windows 11, turn it off whenever it is not in use. As of right now (early 2023), Windows 11 is still only really intended for use in places with 100%-consistent high-speed internet access. The office's internet connection (like most places in Appalachia) can't handle this, so Windows 11 computers are likely to slow the whole network to a crawl. (There are a few things you can do to make this less of a problem, but they're not practical for the office (time-consuming, have to be re-done regularly, will stress everyone out).)

YOU NEED AN ETHERNET PORT - Since spotty wifi is a problem in a lot of places, buying a laptop with no ethernet port is a bad idea. (Also, laptops WITHOUT ethernet adapters aren't generally designed for heavy daily use - they can break easily.)

YOU NEED BOTH AN HDMI PORT AND AN SVGA PORT - The vast majority of TVs/projectors use either HDMI or SVGA ports; some recent laptops are missing one or both. This makes it very hard to, for example, give PowerPoint presentations in old courthouses.

YOU NEED A (SMALL) SSD DRIVE - Computers with SSDs (solid-state drives) can turn on and open files MUCH faster than those with HDDs (hard disc drives). SSDs have less storage space than HDDs, but that doesn't matter for the office's purposes - 256 GB is more than enough.

YOU NEED AT LEAST 8GB OF RAM - Preferably 16GB.

YOU DON'T WANT A "BUILT-IN BATTERY" - This just means "battery that can't be replaced." Laptops like this are designed to be disposable, so they always have a lot of other problems.

YOU NEED AT LEAST TWO USB-3 PORTS - Some recent laptops only have USB-C ports (the tiny ones), not the normal, rectangular ones (USB-3 and -2). USB-C-only laptops are intended as fashion accessories - they're not meant to be used for daily work, and (as above) always have a lot of other problems.

YOU WANT AN INTEL CORE i5-EQUIVALENT-OR-BETTER PROCESSOR - This isn't as big a deal as the RAM or SSD, but i3 processors slow down a lot of stuff.

YOU PROBABLY NEED A CD DRIVE - Many recent laptops don't have CD drives, but there are going to be times when you need them. (If necessary, you can buy a USB CD drive.)

BLUETOOTH ISN'T ACTUALLY VERY IMPORTANT - You can get a USB plugin if you need it, but you probably won't.

YOU DO NOT WANT A MACBOOK OR ANY OTHER APPLE PRODUCT - For too many reasons to list.

YOU DO NOT WANT A CHROMEBOOK - Even worse than MacBooks.

LINUX LAPTOPS ARE USUALLY FINE BUT YOU DON'T KNOW HOW TO USE THEM - You'll end up needing to install Windows 10.