#i haven't listened to it in probably a few months and it just knocked me off my feet

[ibrokeeverything]

Completely unoriginal take, but the moulin rouge soundtrack goes SO HARD

[s1m0nth3swag]

Francis Mosses x GN!Reader

AUTHORS NOTE; Haven't written in a while, but thanks to Arlo, a friend (Hi Arlo, I know you're reading this), Inspiration about Francis Mosses struck (he bought me That's not my neighbor and then continued to freak out about Francis with me) so I wrote this. I have so many thoughts about Francis, so... tell me if you want more because i will deliver ngl. Enjoy (or don't, I don't dictate your feelings)

WARNINGS/ CONTENT INFO; Porn with little to no plot, Submissive Francis, a little non-consensual at the start (but not in a super weird way, imo?), Gender neutral reader (no pronouns used, tried to write as GN as possible with the compliments and thoughts about Readers appearance), not proofread nor have I thought about this much, more a drabble than an actual thoughtful story (not apologising because I had such a long break from writing anything and obviously it's gonna suck a little when I come back)

NSFW UNDER THE CUT!

The first time Francis had realised that he hadn't gotten any touch from another human being was when someone brushed up against him on his way home from work. He had felt like a creep afterwards because he hadn't stopped thinking about what could've happened if the person hadn't moved away and had just stayed pressed against him. That was a week before you started your job as a doorman.

The second time Francis had noticed was when a friend of his had spoken to him on the phone, talking about his new girlfriend. Said friend gave too much intel on their sex life. Francis had wondered if he could have someone the way his friend explained - he quickly brushed the thought off. That was two days before you started working as a doorman.

The third time, he noticed when you had smiled at him. It was your first day, and he was tired from work. You had repeated his name after reading it off of his ID, and he had looked at you for the first time since his eyes kept falling closed, and you smiled so brightly. You had told him his name was nice, and you said it again. Francis swore that the way his name rolled off your tongue was the most beautiful thing he's ever heard. Not even an angel could sound more wonderful. Suddenly, he was a lot more energised. Totally not thanks to the fact that he had immediately grown hard the second he had seen your smile. He had gone to his apartment that night and had jerked off for the first time in probably months. He had always been too tired to previously, but now he couldn't stop thinking about how you'd sound moaning his name. Maybe you were more of a groaner, or you'd whimper and whine. He came as he imagined how you'd look sucking his dick.

Since then, Francis has always looked forward to entry checks. What had normally kept him away from his bed and a good night's sleep was now the best experience of his day. He loved the way you spoke to him even though he was too nervous to respond. Sometimes, he deliberately didn't show his ID at first, just so you'd ask about it, and he could listen to you talk a little more. He felt guilty about it. He knew you had never agreed to feed into this weird little obsession of his. It was awful of him to do this - have you talk to him enough to give him more scenarios to think about that night.

A few weeks after all this had started, Francis had built up the courage to finally ask you out. Just something simple, dinner at his place. He had to cook for himself all the time. Cooking for you as well wouldn't be too different, right?

Francis was wrong. He was anxious that the food wouldn't taste good and kept tasting it just so he could make sure it hadn't mysteriously switched tastes in the last 20 seconds. When you knocked on his door, he took a minute to make sure he didn't look like a mess - though you wouldn't mind either way since he always looked like a mess when he came through during your shifts.

You looked so good when he opened the door. Your hair fell perfectly, your lips looked a little too kissable, and Francis had to stop his train of thought just so he wouldn't embarrass himself by having yet another boner caused by just the way you looked. You were a little shorter than him, smiling up as he let you inside.

"You look good." He mumbled, his cheeks flushing. He seriously had to lay off thinking like a high-schooler. His nervousness and awkwardness were getting really annoying - to him, at least. You grinned, chuckling softly as you took off your shoes. "Thank you. You do as well." His heart for sure burst at that - he knew something else would burst as well if he didn't stop thinking right this second.

Throughout the evening, ignoring his thoughts came easier and easier. The two of you had eaten, you had told him he was a good cook, he had almost excused himself to the bathroom because of it. Now you were sitting on the couch, drinking wine and talking casually.

"You know, when you first walked through, I swore I would die." You giggled, looking at him with a mischievous look. Francis was confused by that statement. "How come?" He asked, tilting his head at you in question. "I was sure you were a doppelganger. You looked too handsome to be real." You cheekily answered, cheeks slightly flushed as you downed your wine. Francis blushed heavily, looked away from you, and thought about your words for a moment. The silence was loud as he wondered what to answer. "..you think I'm handsome?" He questioned while looking at the floor. If he had looked at you, he'd have seen the way you stared at him, your own cheeks coloured a deep red. "Extremely." You muttered. It took him a minute before he could look at you, but when he did, his lips pressed against yours in a desperate kiss.

When you reciprocated, Francis groaned and pulled you closer until you sat on his lap. He was just a tiny bit embarrassed when you gasped and felt his dick press against you. In all honesty, he had held back the entire night, and he was allowed a little selfishness. "Sorry. Can't help it." He muttered between kisses. You just grinned against his lips before grinding against him. A whimper fell from his lips - that was the moment he was actually embarrassed. "That's cute.." You had mumbled, a cheeky grin on your face as you started placing kisses against his jaw and neck. One of your hands trailed down his body to rest right over his crotch, Francis unconsciously bucked his hips up against your hand, whining. He didn't notice anything else as you caught the skin of his neck with your teeth carefully, leaving the softest bite mark on him. He shuddered at the feeling and gasped before realising that you had meanwhile unzipped his pants. A groan slipped from his lips as you ran a finger over his dick, still hidden from sight by his boxers, but god knows he would cum the second you'd touch it without. "Is this okay?" You asked him, and he nodded faster than he even knew he could. "Yes. God, yes. Please, please continue.." he muttered, his breathing heavy as he watched you slide off his lap, settling in front of him and between his legs. His dick twitched at the sight, and he let out a heavy sigh. Minutes later, his pants and boxers were discarded, and the way you looked up at him, his dick so close to your face, made Francis feel the way his orgasm was approaching way too quick. The second you wrapped your hand around him he whined pathetically, bucked up into your hand and knew that he'd definitely cum too soon. Your hand was so soft, cool against his hot flesh, and you worked his dick so good he almost thought you were a professional. He looked down at you through lidded eyes, watched the way you bit your lip, and grinned knowingly. "Such a pretty boy, huh?" You chuckled, and that definitely sealed the deal for Francis. He came, probably ruining his shirt as he dirtied both it and your hand. His heart stopped for a second when you licked your hand while looking up at him. "You didn't give me enough time to taste you properly. Don't look at me like that." You huffed, rolling your eyes at him. "You should probably take off your shirt so you can clean it later." You then winked. He swiftly shed the piece of clothing, entranced by your voice and the way you looked. "Sorry, didn't mean to cum that fast.." he mutters, his voice out of breath. "Jus'.. unused to... this.." he added, clearing his throat awkwardly. You laughed and shook your head. "Don't worry about it. We have all the time in the world to make you last longer. I'm gonna give you a real reason to be tired tomorrow." You winked.

Francis didn't even mind that he was in for a long night.

Your honour I am gnawing at the bars of my enclosure.

[daceydeath]

I Want to Watch

Pairing: Wooyoung x Reader x San Word Count: 2.5K Genre: Pure Smut 🔞 Warnings: 18+, MDNI, Explicit Activities

AN: This idea came from writing a short one shot called 4:15 pm so it mentions the events of that but is not strictly related.

Wooyoung has had a brilliant idea but he is yet to actually mention it to anyone other than San.

 Wooyoung had teased you relentlessly about it for almost three weeks before you had lost your cool and snapped at him that he should just ask San to join you then if it was that important to him to watch his best friend fuck you. Funnily enough that seemed to work and he dropped the subject all together for another full month until he began to invite you round for dates when the others were home or when they were likely to be coming home. Teasing you about how he could just leave the door unlocked and call Hongjoong in to let him watch or that he bet you would look so hot with Jongho's cock in your mouth while he fucked you, each time getting you more receptive to his idea of his friends watching you, it started to actually turn you on. He knew you had a tiny bit of an exhibition kink, you never minded if they overheard you, but he never actually let the members see you or even hear you before the time San had discovered you and you had responded to him purposely toying with San more than he had anticipated.

"Woo what movie did you want to watch?" you called from the couch flipping through the streaming service to find something neither of you had watched. You could hear him muttering from the kitchen but you couldn't make out anything he said.

"Woo? Are you even listening to me?" You raised your eyebrows at him and watched him pace another length of the kitchen, phone in his hand "What's wrong?". He stopped to look at you, opening and closing his mouth a few times before huffing and walking over to sit beside you and pull you closer to him, his lips on your temple kissing you lightly.

"I may have done something that you may get mad about but I'm not sure yet, but in my defense it is a brilliant thing" he admitted letting you see how nervous he actually was.

"What have you done?" you asked, dryly knowing it could be anything from buying you a stupidly oversized plushie, a designer bag or ordering pizza. His ability to answer was cut off by a knock on the apartment door making you quickly assume it was probably closer to take out than anything more incorrigible. He let go of you to go answer and came back with a slightly flushed looking San which just confused you.

"Hey Sannie" you smiled furrowing your eyebrows "How are you?"

"I'm good" San nodded looking between you and Wooyoung "Am I early? You said come by at 9 Woo".

"So the thing is..." Wooyoung started his cheeks turning dark pink as he struggled to get the words out making you even more confused "You remember how you.... No um. Give me a second" he turned back to San pushing him into the entrance alcove and out of your line of sight. Although you could hear hushed but slightly frantic whispered bickering between the two of them.

"Man if you haven't asked her we can just make it another time, I'm not going to make her feel like she's being pushed" San muttered sounding worried.

"She will hear you moron" Wooyoung hissed "Also if you're here or not I'm not forcing her you dickhead".

"I didn't say you were I just don't want her feeling pressured that would be shitty" San sighed annoyed.

"Or you could both just talk like normal people since I can hear you both and am so confused right now" You interrupted loudly making them both sheepishly peer around to corner to look at you. "What is going on? Is this some kind of intervention that you two are trying to pull?".

"No, absolutely not" San shook his head innocently even though you were pretty sure he was far from innocent in this whole debacle.

"Then what is going on you're really starting to piss me off" you frowned looking between them and wondering when someone would explain the cryptic shit they were bickering about.

"Shit, baby it's nothing bad I promise" Wooyoung panicked coming back over to the couch with San hot on his heels "You remember when we were at that video shoot and you and I snuck off and..."

"and everyone was looking for you while you were too horny to keep your hands off me and just had to fuck me in an empty office? Yeah I remember I was there" you smirked watching both of their ears turn red and San look up at the ceiling to avoid your gaze.

"Yeah, do you remember that San found us and what I said?" he continued looking a little braver as you pieced together what he was saying.

"You want to have a threesome" you guessed, stopping him from dragging it out further, a wave of heat rushing straight to your core.

"Well I actually wanted to start off with him but eventually invite the others in too" he smirked watching your eyes widen "not all at once though".

"You want me to have sex with all of your members? all 7 of them?" you swallowed hard your embarrassment now showing as you felt your own cheeks burning at the reaction you were having to the idea of it.

"Yeah maybe? I wanted them to watch me fuck you then I wanted to watch them fuck you" he continued getting bolder with each word his grin getting larger as he saw how well you were responding to the idea.

"So you want to watch me with San?" you repeated, pressing your thighs together slightly to relieve the throb that was beginning to spread from your core. Biting your lip you tore your eyes from your boyfriends to look as his best friend who was trying to remain looking as neutral as possible. "Is that what you want, San?".

"Absolutely" San uttered without thinking, only to slap his hand over his mouth cutely after realizing what he had done, making you smile shyly at him.

"You going to keep being shy or are you going to kiss her?" Wooyoung teased his friend, his eyes already turning darker as he looked at  you as if you were a meal and he was starving to death.

"She hasn't agreed yet, Woo calm down" San smacked him on the shoulder before moving to sit beside you on the couch "Is this what you want princess?" he asked huskily, his voice getting so much lower than you had ever heard it, it was making your brain short circuit. You licked your lips looking at him for a moment trying to clear the fog that was already in your brain before nodding.

"I need words princess" he smirked, lifting your chin to stare into your eyes looking at you as intensely as Wooyoung had been making you feel a little shy at how wet he was making you without him even touching you.

"Please Sannie" you whispered breathily before San crashed his lips into yours. Kissing San was completely different to kissing Woo. You were so used to Wooyoung's deep, messy and needy kisses that San's sensual lingering ones made you gasp his plush lips were gentle against yours almost tentative as he let you initiate any increase in intensity only taking back control when you let a quiet moan pass into his mouth driving him to pull you into his lap to straddle his hard thighs.

"Didn't expect you to be so desperate to fuck San baby" Woo rasped his voice tight as he watched to make out with his best friend. You whined pressing yourself against the bulge that was growing in San's sweatpants enjoying the pressure against your pussy. “Look how needy you are, like I never take care of you huh?”.

San let his hands map your curves, eventually coming to rest on your arse squeezing it firmly as he encouraged you to grind on him a little bit. You were already feeling more aroused than you had any right to be, making out with your boyfriend's best friend should not get you as impossibly wet as you were but you couldn’t stop the needy gasps and moans leaving your mouth. San planted his feet harder against the floor gripping you tighter as he lifted you, walking you to Wooyoung’s bedroom where he carefully placed you on the bed on your back pressing soft kisses to your jaw and neck before peeling down your sweats to get better access to you.

“Shit” San groaned, his eyes locked on the wetness that had seeped into your underwear staining the white lace and making it virtually see through. Not being able to help yourself you felt yourself preen under the intensity of his stare biting your lip to get him to move back to you. His large hands ghosted up the skin of your thighs passing your hips and continuing up your sides so he could help you out of your shirt before connecting his lips back to yours

“Fuck baby” Woo groaned, smirking at the scene from the door “a few kisses and you turn into a complete whore”.

You opened your mouth to say something but your retort died in your throat and was replaced by a moan and San locked his lips around one of your nippled scraping the lace against your sensitive bud with his teeth, one of your hands flying out to steady yourself and the other grabbing hold of his hair.

“Sannie” you gasped feeling him smile against your breast, he continued covering your body with lingering kisses working his way down to your core, making you sigh and groan while he explored. “Shit Sannie”.

Stopping his mapping of your body he stood to quickly strip himself of his clothes leaving him in boxers that left little to the imagination, his thick cock straining against the fabric making your mouth water.

“Don’t torture the poor slut man” Woo ordered his voice thick with arousal as he sat at the bottom of the bed his eyes locked on you.

“Yes Sir” San grinned, pulling off his boxers and manhandling you back into his lap, tearing the lace that was left covering you from your hips with one harsh tug.

“Fuck off San I liked that set” Woo grumbled halfheartedly while San stoked his fingers between your folds making you mewl and arch into him searching for more, you couldn’t see your boyfriends face but from the mischievous grin that crossed San’s face and the sound of annoyance that left Wooyoung’s lips San was not meant to be toying with you this much. Sliding two fingers inside you making you whine, San couldn’t help the moan that rumbled through his chest into yours, his finger sliding in so easily that you should have been embarrassed.

“Such a wet little pussy” he whispered kissing your lips again while you fucked yourself on his fingers with an air of desperation, his low chuckled making you want more as he pulled his fingers back out of you with and obscene squelch before shoving them in his mouth.

“Hey!” Woo protested but you couldn’t concentrate on his words you just needed something, anything “We talk about this”

“Sannie, please, need your cock” you murmured weakly, your body burning for him in a way you had never felt.

“Course princess” he smirked, grabbing his length to line himself up with your entrance before letting you sink down on him.

“Such a desperate little whore begging for another man’s cock, you need that much cock that just mine isn’t enough?” Wooyoung grunted making you whimper as you felt your walls stretching around San’s dick until your hips met his. Rolling your hips experimentally you felt like you were being split in half by how much thicker he was than what you were used to, your head fell forward against his shoulder as you let yourself adjust.

“Give the pathetic slut what she wants, San” Woo continued, his voice more strained the longer he watched. Resting his hands on your hips almost gently San helped you begin to grind against him his breathing getting heavier as your confidence grew until you began bouncing on him your tits brushing against his chest with each movement.

“Fuck don’t want to be rough with you” San choked out as he tried to not snap his hips up to meet your pace.

“Please Sannie, I need it, please fuck me, please” you begged your eyes glassy as you met his eyes.

“Begging like a needy whore huh? Is San’s cock that good?” Wooyoung mocked harshly.

“I got you princess” San muttered gently before grabbing your hips bruisingly and snapping his hips up into you sharply making you cry out your head falling back and your mouth open letting him use you like you needed so intensely. San’s lips moved you your neck kissing and nibbling your sensitive skin as he pounded you into a pleasurable oblivion

“Aww is my little baby drunk on cock?” Wooyoung asked sweetly moving to claim your lips after not touching you for so long, lolling your head to the side you could see he hadn’t been able to control himself his cock out of his pants as his tugged at it in time with San’s thrusts and he fucked you. “Let him fuck you full yeah baby? You gonna let another man fill you with his cum? Let him breed you in front of me?”. The moan that fell from your lips was pornographic as another wave of arousal began soaking San’s length and practically dripping onto his balls.

“Fuck Woo she loved that” San grunted feeling your walls begin to flutter around him as your orgasm drew nearer.

“You going to let San claim you baby? Gonna let him knock you up like a little needy whore” Wooyoung knew you were close from the little gasps that you let out between your moans, each one getting shorter until you would explode.

“Ah…ngh…Sannie” you cried as you came so hard you could barely keep yourself upright, San moving one hand to hold you against him as he continued to fuck you through your orgasim and into the start of your next one.

“Fuck princess” he grunted roughly his cock stiffening inside you before painting your walls with thick ropes of his seed. His hips slowed until you were both still you resting against his bare chest both panting for air.

That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen” Wooyoung swallowed hard while San moved you so you could at least see your boyfriend who had managed to finish all on his own “Never cum untouched before”. You could feel San breathlessly chuckle as you realized that you were still connected, his dick softening inside your walls.

“That was....fuck” San mumbled, still not attempting to move you off of him.

“We are doing this again” Woo grinned, moving so he could watch San’s seed drip from your stretched entrance before eventually helping to move you onto the bed so they could clean you up.

AN: Thank you for reading my lovelies. I adore you so much and your likes, reblogs and comments warm my half dead little heart xx

Taglist (open): @christopher-bangnaldoskzz @armystay89 @damnyouficc @roamingpolar @tara-skyhold @bakedlilgoonie , @krishastumblernow , @mrsseals16 , @fawnpeaks @leeknowinggg @uno7 @tanzen-ist-gold

[scoobyrooster1]

She's Mine [Intro]

Qimir x (she/her)!reader

Summary: Events take place after episode 8 of the acolyte. You are Qimirs new acolyte after agreeing to train under him. But, first you both must escape to the outer rim and outrun the Jedi who now hunts you. A precarious situation arises when you suddenly owe a debt to the local gunrunner... but it could be just the opportunity you've been hoping for. Warnings: None so far Notes: I plan for this to be a slow burn story between you and Qimir. Future heist plot on canto bight. Haven't officially decided on a permanent title yet. Probably needs more edits lol.

^ Nice ambience for the intro

Master List

She's Mine [Intro]  She's Mine [Part 1] She's Mine [Part 2]

______________________________________________________________

You and Qimir had been on the road for months now. Vernestra couldn’t put out an official warrant on you both—not without raising questions she didn’t want to answer. Instead, she relied on something more insidious: whispers, rumors, just enough to keep you glancing over your shoulder but never enough to reveal her true intentions.

So now you found yourself sitting in a mossy dive bar waiting on a pilot that could be your last chance to escape republic space. He was 20 minutes late and it had been one hell of a day. Your patience was wearing thin.

You felt someone sit down at the stool next to you. Not giving them any notice ----until they spoke.

"Oi. Ale for me and whatever the lady wants."

You stifled a grunt, eyes remaining fixed on your drink.

"Not interested."

The bartender, unfazed, slid a glass down the bar landing directly into the strangers hand with ease. He took a full three chugs before wiping his chin with the back of his hand.

Exhaling he exclaimed. "Not interested?... Handsome fella like me? Sure you are."

"Its been a rough day." You grimaced, still not sparing him a glance.

"Well its about to get a little more difficult."

You could feel him shift beside you. Instinctively, you unholstered your blaster and aimed it directly at his crotch. You were now face to face with Ian Skynyr. Notorious playboy and smuggler.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." You whispered.

He only froze, eyes widening on where your blaster now rested. His shoulders slightly relaxed almost as impressed as he was shocked.

"Easy"

"Like I said its been a long day and I'm not especially forgiving on those. So get lost."

"One of my men is in a bacta tank thanks to you."

You recalled what had transpired a mere few hours ago.

Some thug saw you walking through the bazar. Cloaked, your figure appeared small and unthreatening. He assumed you'd be an easy target. He assumed wrong.

Qimir had found you standing over the aqualish male, his breathing labored, knocked unconscious with far more hidden injuries.

All Qimir had said to you was, lets go. No emotion shown on his striking face.

"If he wanted an easy pocket to pick he shouldn't have cornered me."

"Listen sunshine, you put me in a bit of a bind here."

"Not my problem. I know your line of work and I'm not looking for that kind of heat."

Neither you or Qimir could take that right now.

The stranger didn’t back off. He leaned in, just enough for you to catch the scent of engine grease and blaster residue.

"Oh I think it is, don't think I don't know exactly why you're sitting here."

You suppressed a laugh. Of course.

"So I can assume you intercepted my pilot."

"Theres now a debt to pay. Im here to collect."

"I wouldn't bet on it."

"Right... Only a certain type of woman wears with an LL-30 blaster pistol strapped to her thigh."

"And it only takes a special kind of idiot to steal from her." You retracted the gun back to under your cloak.

He cracked a smile.

"The job I have lined up that you so gracefully mucked might actually be of some interest to you."

"I highly doubt that."

"You and your friend need to get to the outer rim no? Something about avoiding the order? I can provide that for you both so long as you pay whats now owed."

You couldn’t hide the shock on your face.

So the pilot had a loose mouth. But you knew Qimir would later curse you for your own.

"I don't owe you anything."

"Deny that little fact all you want. What you can't deny is that the republic has been slowly tightening its grip on hyperspace routes. Good luck finding another freighter that can slip past their patrols unnoticed."

You frowned.

He wasn’t wrong. Vernestra wouldn't risk the upper hand she now had on the two of you. It was easy enough to establish stricter checkpoints in the name of peace and safety. Finding another ship capable of making it past their checkpoints undetected and unquestioned would be next to impossible.

You sat there. Silent. Weighing the options in front of you. Even though you had your finger on the trigger and every reason to pull it, you squirmed underneath the predicament he now faced you with.

He watched the gears turning behind your eyes, carefully calculating your next move.

"Well." he sighed "If you're that confident, I guess its easy enough for me to find another replacement."

He slowly stood, nudging the now empty glass towards the edge of the bar.

"Good luck out running the damned Jedi."

What were your chances of another opportunity like this? As damned as the circumstances were.

Before he could step out of the cantina you turned.

"Wait."

Ian inclined his head to you, smile spreading across his stupid face.

Qimir was going to kill you.

_____________________________________________________________

[darkbluekies]

Do we actually know what happens in the basement? Or did I miss it somewhere?It sounds terrfying but I can’t seem to find or remeber what happens in it

I haven't exactly written what goes on in the basement, but from a few oneshots etc, you can piece together that there are probably a lot of isolation, starvation, mental manipulation and physical things. I want/plan to make a one-shot where yn is in the basement after doing something they shouldn't:)

Examples/times the basement is mentioned to get a better understanding of just how bad it can be (with links in case you want to read the stories<3):

Best for you:

You messed up badly. You should not have tried to escape. Look where you ended up — in the darkest corner of his basement with your ankles chained to the stone floor. Reduced to nothing more than a dog.

You're not sure how long you've been down here, but you've been given the opportunity to use the degrading potty four times by now by rough, evil men. Or was it more?

You press yourself closer to the wall, wishing nothing else than to melt into it and disappear. 

"No, no, no, shh, it's okay", he says quickly. "I'm not going to hurt you anymore. Everything is over. I'm here to help."

You doubt that.

His hand comes up to massage your roots. All of these actions are so soft and after being chained up in this cold, hard and unforgiving basement, you can't do anything else but slowly relax.

The witty and uncanny part 1

Resting now might be crucial in case Silas decides to find you again. Otherwise you might be too vulnerable for Silas's harsh manipulation. You won’t survive the basement if you’re not rested up.

Intruder part 2

The chains around your wrists, ankles and throat kep you in place. Like a filthy dog. You start to feel less and less human and more like an animal for every day that passes by. You remind yourself of your name, your background and your family to avoid going insane. But maybe that's what he wants? He wants you dumb and dusted for him so you won't try to escape. Maybe he wants you to be a blank canvas that only he can paint in whatever color and shapes he wants. Maybe he wants to mold your brain into his perfect servant. Someone that does everything he wants at the blink of an eye.

Can't hide from me

Every motion is quiet and terrified. You’re horrified you’ll turn around and see him stand right behind you with his death glare, ready to throw you back into the basement. You’d rather die than end up there again. You don’t think you can take another day, week or month in the basement. To be fair, you never know how long you’re down there. One time you entered when the snow was falling outside and came out when the first flowers bloomed.

“Listen, baby, you have two choices. Either, you come with me like a good little pet and don’t cause trouble. That way, your punishment will be much lighter. Or, you can continue to act like a brat and I’ll knock you unconscious and throw you into the basement until you grow mold. What do you say? Are you going to behave?”

[agaypanic]

The Boyfriend Next Door (Francis Wilkerson X Neighbor!Reader)

Masterlist

Request Something!

Summary: A few months after meeting Francis, he’s finally coming back home for spring. He calls you before boarding his plane, and Francis leaves you anxious and excited when he says he has a question to ask when he gets home.

A/N: last francis fic!!! this is part 2 to the boy next door’s brother, so read that first if you haven't yet. I know the first part is written in third person but im writing this in second, idc. Added the SASU thing just for conversational stuff, im not having this fic be in a specific point in the actual series, although in my head it does take place in season 1

***

Francis had made good use of the phone number you had written on his arm the night you met. After landing in Alabama, he called you for a quick chat while he waited for a cab. Then Francis called you at the academy after putting his things in his dorm, telling you the number for the academy phone in case you ever wanted to call him. 

Eventually, he was calling you so much that he had your number memorized before the end of the week.

Francis loved talking to you. And he was right; he liked hearing about your day a lot more from you than from Malcolm. You could talk his ear off, then the other, and he still wouldn’t mind. If anything, the only people who seemed to mind were his fellow cadets waiting for a chance to use the phone.

“Enough about me,” Francis said, wrapping up a story about one of his latest antics involving the Southern Alabama State University’s pool. “What’ve you been up to?”

“Definitely not property damage.” He heard you laugh through the phone, and his pulse quickened a bit. “Nothing but homework, at least that’s what it feels like. Thank God for spring break, otherwise my brain might break.”

“Speaking of spring break…” Francis trailed off, picking at some peeling paint on the pillar the phone was mounted on. “Got any plans?”

You smiled at his tone, like he had a big secret. “Not that I know of. Why?”

He shrugged. “No reason. Just thought I’d ask.”

“Are you staying in Alabama for break?” You tried to keep the disappointment out of your voice. You hadn’t seen Francis since the day you met, which was almost three months ago. It’s not that you absolutely needed to see him. But multiple calls a week, where conversations ranged from your day-to-day to little secrets no one else knew about you, made you want to see him face to face. 

Francis made a non-commital noise, shrugging even though you couldn’t see it. “Depends on if my mom ever finds out about the pool.”

***

Francis was lying, of course. He didn’t want to lie to you, even though there was no ill intention behind it, but he wanted to surprise you. 

But while waiting for his flight to board, he got impatient.

“Y/n?” Francis asked after hearing the phone get picked up.

“Hey, Francis.” You greeted, and he heard some rustling, which was probably you leaving the room to get some privacy. “What’s up?”

“Not much.” He answered, jumping a little when he heard his flight being called.

“Where are you right now?”

“Uhh, doesn’t matter. Listen, I have a question I wanna ask you, Y/n.” While speaking, Francis looked at his ticket and realized he had to get in line for boarding. 

“Okay…” You let out a little chuckle, wondering why he was sounding so frantic. “Go ahead.”

“I’ll have to ask you later, I gotta go. But I’ll, um, I’ll see you in a couple hours.”

“Wait, what-”

“Bye!”

***

You were on edge for the next few hours. You tried calling the academy for Francis, but another cadet picked up, saying he was flying home today. Hearing that made you anxious, in a good and bad way. You were finally seeing Francis after months of only phone calls, but you had no time to prepare for his arrival. His saying he had a question for you right before hanging up didn’t help. 

When there was a frantic knock on the front door, you all but flew out of your seat on the couch, yelling to your parents that you would answer. They just laughed at your excitement before returning to the TV.

Reaching the entryway, you flung the door open, relieved that the person on the other side was who you were hoping for. “Francis!” 

The boy before you dropped his suitcase to catch you as you launched yourself into his arms. “Surprise.” He laughed, caught off guard by the affection. But it was definitely not unwelcome. 

“What are you doing here?” You asked, pulling back to look at him. But before he could answer, you waved your hand, a more important question popping into your mind. “Wait! No, no, no, what was your question?”

“My question?” Francis tried to act dumb, but it was a futile attempt, considering you had been thinking about your previous conversation since it happened.

“You said you had a question to ask me, and then you hung up. What’s the question?”

Francis laughed again, but this time more nervously. He had spent the whole flight panicking over what he wanted to ask you and then spent the whole car ride hyping himself up to actually ask it. And now, here he was. “Oh, right…” Francis’ fingers locked together, keeping you in his hold, which you didn’t mind at all. His thumbs drummed against your back, building up the anticipation.

“Francis-”

“Do you wanna go out?” He blurted, and you blinked in surprise. “On a date. With me.”

“Like… now?” You were trying to keep your cool, but you couldn’t stop the giant grin from taking over your face.

Francis took this as a good sign. “We could go now, if you want. Or, or later in the week, maybe. And then, you know, maybe if it goes well, we could go on another date and maybe…”

“Start dating?” You finished, hoping that’s where he was going. “Like, officially?”

He nodded furiously, glad that you were getting the idea that he was trying to get across. “Yeah. I mean, if you want to, obviously. We could take it slow or-” 

You cut off what was about to be a nervous ramble by pressing your lips to Francis’. You were just so caught up in your excitement, you couldn’t help but kiss him. Francis pulled you closer, if that was even possible, deepening the kiss, and you hoped that your parents wouldn’t come to check on the two of you.

The both of you were out of breath when you broke apart, resting your foreheads against each other. After the months of build-up, you didn’t want to take it slow. And judging by the kiss you shared, Francis felt the same way.

“Malcolm’s gonna be so pissed,” Francis murmured, and you felt a ghost of a smile against your lips as he kissed you again.

***

Malcolm in the Middle Taglist: @rattilol

Francis Wilkerson Taglist: @tweedledipshit

[stormberry-12]

Heyy,I love your writing! May I request a JJ fic inspired by the ‘Work Song’ by Hozier?

time comes around ~ jj maybank x reader

pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader (jj pov)

warnings: making out, jj's dad being a dick, mentions of jj's good ol' gun, language. (not very well edited)

notes: thank you so much for the request and I'm so sorry it took soooo long. it gave me so much to work with and it ended up being super long lol, i hope it turned out okay I kinda just went with what the lyrics reminded me of.

you also don't really have to read all of them if you don't want, they're all just blurbs off JJ and Y/n's life together. ❤

(i recommend listening while you read>>>>)

Boys workin' on empty Is that the kinda way to face the burning heat? I just think about my baby I'm so full of love I could barely eat

"Jayj!" she giggled, dropping her fork on the table and staring at me.

"What?!?" I laughed in mock offense, crossing my arms and leaning back in my chair.

"You haven't even touched your food," y/n complained, her pretty eyes squinting at me in confusion.

"I-"

"You love food." she interrupted me, a smile playing on her lips, "Probably more than you love anything else in the world, now eat!"

"Not as much as I love you," I whisper, she looks down at her plate with a smile and a blush. "I don't want to eat... I just want to watch you,"

"That sounds creepy when you say it like that, stop!" she choked on her food and I fell into a fit of laughter that squeezed my lungs, making it hard to breathe. She made it hard to breathe.

There's nothing sweeter than my baby I'd never want once from the cherry tree 'Cause my baby's sweet as can be She give me toothaches just from kissin' me

I hummed into her lips, they were sweet, soft, and warm. I tapped her thighs signaling for her to jump up, she wrapped her legs around my waist, hands in my hair.

Her back hit the wall and I slid my hands up her waist. She hummed into my mouth and we broke away panting.

"Missed you too-"

"Shut up." she said and I laughed, leaning my forehead against hers. I was so glad it was finally summer, her family would stay at their beach house for the next few months and we would spend every day together. Love only growing.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

Boys, when my baby found me I was three days on a drunken sin I woke with her walls around me Nothin' in her room but an empty crib

I woke up with the sun shining through the curtain, y/n was laying on top of me, her arms and body heavy like they were sheltering me from a storm. In this case, the storm was my dad.

She shifted on top of me, rubbing her eyes from sleep.

"Morning," she whispered.

"Mornin'," I said back, shifting our position and sitting up, pulling her into my lap.

"I'm so sorry," she rubbed patterns into my bicep, "I had no idea... do- do you want to talk about it?"

I looked down at her beautiful face and shrugged my shoulders. She looked up at me and I wrapped my arms around her tighter.

"He has no right to do that-" her fingertips ghosted over the scar on my cheek that she had patched up the night before. After I had come knocking away on her window way past midnight.

I felt a pain in my chest, "I'm sorry I bothered you with this, I'm so sorry-" I buried my face in her neck so she wouldn't see me cry.

"Oh Jayj..."

A sob broke my lips and my shoulders shook, god I was being such a baby.

She turned to face me, still sitting in my lap, holding the sides of my face with her hands. Her eyes were watering as she kissed each tear that fell from my face before wiping it away.

"You could never bother me," she said, voice more stern. I silently thanked her.

God, how did I get so lucky.

And I was burnin' up a fever I didn't care much how long I lived But I swear I thought I dreamed her She never asked me once about the wrong I did

"Y/n-" I said sitting on the couch, running a hand through my hair, "I can't believe I did that, I'm so sorry-"

She just watched me from the other side of the chateau, leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed over her chest. Her expression was unreadable, eyes stone cold.

I had just pulled a gun out at the kegger, I was so stupid.

And not only did I put it up against Topper's head at some point but I fired it into the air. I let my anger get the best of me, it could cost me my freedom, my friends, or even y/n.

I hoped she wouldn't- oh god.

"Please don't dump me!" I squeaked out.

"Dump you?" she laughed shaking her head.

"I'm being serious, why are you laughing?!?!" I panicked standing up and bringing my hands to my head.

"Cuz your funny," she walked towards the back door and left the chateau. I followed her out back, she was walking to where the rest of the pogues were eating around a fire.

I sat down beside her and grabbed a hot dog and a roasting stick.

"So, we all sorted out?" Pope asked, raising his eyebrows at our sudden appearance.

"Did she give you shit?"

John B chuckled and I flipped him off, "No, actually..."

"Damn!" Kie said. "Your lucky JJ, not many people can put up with your shenanigans-"

The conversation shifted to something royal merchant related, I ate my hot dog and snuck glances at y/n. She was wiping sticky marshmallows off her finger, but it just kept spreading all over her clothes. I looked down and my plate and smiled.

Kie was right, y/n was the only one that could deal with me. But I was also the only one that could deal with her.

We couldn't live without each other.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

My baby never fret none About what my hands and my body done If the Lord don't forgive me I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me

"Hey, y/n!" Rafe called from across the boneyard, "Your not still seeing that dirty pogue are you?"

"I'm sorry?" she said taking a sip of her beer.

Ward Cameron's evil spawn got closer and eyed me up and down, "Honestly, I can't believe you guys are still hanging on, normally JJ would have moved on to a new bitch by now-"

"Ohhhh shittttt," Kelce and Topper called from behind him.

I stood up lighting fast but y/n grabbed my arm to stop me, "How dare you!" she shamed him.

y/n knew I had a past on the island, I had slept around with a lot of girls. I made a promise to her and myself that I was done with that shit, and it was working out for the best.

y/n tossed the rest of her beer on the back of Rafe's shirt as he walked away, he whirled around fuming.

"Try us, I dare you," John B said, he and Pope were now beside me, and Rafe backed off.

Y/n was still holding my hand, rubbing her thumb over my palm.

Yeah, Rafe, try us, I dare you.

When I was kissing on my baby And she put her love down soft and sweet In the low lamp light I was free Heaven and hell were words to me

The sun from the hot day was setting behind the sky and the soft glow of the street lights began to shine. The breeze was warm and the ocean was crisp.

I dusted the sand off my board, "One more go before dark?" I asked her.

She nodded slowly, pulling her hair up into a ponytail and following me toward the water. "I'm still not so good at this Jayj," she said fidgeting with her fingers.

"No, you're doing great!" I encouraged, pushing the board into her hands, "Go on, I'm right behind you."

We joined the rest of the pogues in the water, I watched as y/n got up on her board and rode a wave all the way down. Pride rushed through me as the pogues broke out in cheers.

"LET'S GO BABY!!"

She laughed and sat down on my board paddling over to me, "I'm so fucking proud of you right now!" I said pulling her off the board and into my arms. She giggled and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Nice one squirt!" John B ruffled her hair and Kie said something about celebratory french fries on her.

I kissed her sweetly and looked into her eyes, "Your fearless, you know that?"

She just grinned at me, but I only spoke the truth, she was.

Love felt so wonderful.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you y/n," I slurred drunkenly, but it was most definitely true. Drunk words, sobber thoughts.

She giggled and buried her face in my neck.

"I'm serious!" I complained.

"Same." Y/n said, sounding just as deadly serious as I was. We locked eye contact, her gaze reaching mine.

"What if you die before y/n? Like when you're a Grandpa and all your smoking comes to bite you in the ass?" John B countered jokingly.

"Well you know, like when I die, I'll probably get buried and shit-" I felt myself start to ramble, "but then Imma be all badass, and dig my way out!"

"What the fuck?" Y/n cackled, tears brimming her eyes from laughing so hard. Kie choked on her beer and Pope gave her a few good hard slaps on the back.

"Yeah, and then I'll come to find you," I said confidently. "NO GRAVE CAN HOLD ME DOWN!!!"

The pogues broke into laughter and I held Y/n's body tighter, I would never let her go. After all we had been through together, the ups and the downs, I knew at that moment it would always be her.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

[aureliaporter]

not so secret secret identity

summary: your best friend needs to tell you something. too bad you're oblivious.

a/n: literally me bc i never watch any news or anything. also first time doing x reader!! lmk if there's anything y'all wanna see, and i'll do my best :)

cw: fluff, gn!reader, slightly oblivious!reader, exasperated peter parker (mcu!!), intended lowercase!

PETER HAD SOMETHING to tell you, based off of his texts. or rather, something he wasn't telling you that you were very intent on figuring out.

you knocked the door to his apartment, an old tune from elementary school band that you somehow still remembered to this day. after a few beats, aunt may opened the door, offering a small smile and nodding down the hall.

"he's in his room."

you nodded, slightly embarrassed that your intentions were so clear on your face, and slipped past her - making sure to leave your shoes by the door.

you leaned against peter's doorframe, watching his hunched-over form with an amused smile. he was probably tinkering with something again, or trying to figure out his english homework. you pushed off the doorframe, wrapping your arms around him from behind. "miss me?"

after a rather undignified shriek and a few exchanged words, peter was sitting on the edge of his bed as you laid down, legs propped up. you both waited for each other to speak

"so-"

"i was-"

the two of you stared at each other before looking away, slightly embarrassed. "can i..?" peter asked, glancing at you. you nodded, stretching your arms as you waited for him to speak.

"so, you're- you're probably here cause i quit everything, right?" he asked, fiddling with his fingers. you hummed, bobbing your head side to side.

"maybe."

he looked up at you, confused. "maybe? then- why're you here-?"

"it's kind of obvious you're going through a thing," you said, cutting him off. "aunt may says it's puberty, but either way i'm sure you'd prefer to be around someone instead of by yourself. kind of what support groups are for," you added, referring to the name of their group chat with mj and ned.

he let out an odd noise, a sort of exasperated chuckle. "it's not puberty."

"didn't say it was."

"you just did."

"no, i said aunt may said it was puberty. learn to listen, young padawan," you said, flicking his forehead.

"that's not even-! you can't use star wars quotes if you haven't watched the movies."

"i can, and it's called the first amendment."

"so if i misquote that weird crow kid from your book series?"

"hey," you said, sitting up and poking his chest. "nobody disgraces kaz brekker like that. the bastard of the barrel deserves better."

the two of you stared at each other before breaking into laughter, soft giggles and muffled snorts. as you laid back on the bed, feeling a bit lighter than before, you noticed a flash of red and blue from peter's closet.

"yo, pete?" you asked, nodding to the suit. "isn't halloween not for another few months? what's with the outfit?"

you watched as peter's face morphed through three different emotions within the span of a few seconds. he paled, lunging for the suit and kicking it back into his closet, then slamming the door. he turned back around, offering a sheepish smile. "uh.. costume party?"

you raised an eyebrow, an amused huff escaping you. "want to try again?"

he stared at you for a second before slumping, a depressed look on his face. he tossed himself onto the bed beside you, nearly hitting you in the face. you didn't say anything, though, giving him a minute to get his thoughts together.

after a few minutes, you heard his voice again. "promise me you won't tell anyone."

you blinked, cocking your head at him curiously. he wasn't looking at you, face still planted in his sheets. biting back a smart remark, you nodded. "i promise."

you heard a sigh escape him, and then he was sitting up, staring at you hard. and then,

"i'm spiderman."

silence blanketed the pair of you for a few seconds, soon turning into a minute. you merely blinked, confused. "who?"

he seemed confused, too. "what do you mean, who? spiderman! you know, the- the dude in red and blue? with a mask? who protects the city?"

you looked sheepish, lips moving soundlessly as you tried to think of a way to respond. "pete, i- we both know i like, never leave my house," you said. "i-i didn't even know this guy existed."

peter stared blankly at you, his confused expression slowly turning to disbelief as a laugh escaped him, then another, and then he was laughing completely, small tears escaping him.

"y-you! i was- i was so scared of telling you! and you- you don't even know who he is!" he laughed, trying to muffle himself and ultimately failing.

after a moment or two, you started to laugh as well, the pair of you chortling at your own oblivion. aunt may smiled to herself in the other room, glad that, even as he was going through puberty not, he still had friends like you to help him through it.

and yes, peter eventually did explain spiderman to you in detail - a powerpoint presentation, complete with ironman memes and snacks - and yes, you did end up whacking him with a pillow when you learned of all the times he nearly died, but peter didn't mind at all.

he didn't mind because the feeling that echoed in him as he tucked you into his bed, exhausted from a pillow fight and an overdose of sour gummies, was warm and fuzzy and precious and made him smile a little too wide for his liking.

and, he thought to himself as he looked up at you from his makeshift bed on the floor, if you could handle this confession so well, then you should be able to handle another.

here with another one! i think i'm liking the casual romance thing, it's so nice to experiment with :3 i've always loved this spiderman trope too lmao, it's so cute and such a mood. anyway, happy days to you all <3

[jenniquinn]

Joseph Quinn X Reader

Joe was away filming and your heart aches missing him. He would send you messages telling you he missed you and how much he loved you. It had already been a month since you've seen your boyfriend so you decided since you were off this week from work you'd fly to where he was filming.

You pack your bag then make sure you've gotten everything before locking the door and getting in your Uber. He tried calling you even FaceTime but you told him you were shutting your phone off. He was worried because you only did that when you were upset.

You make it to la where he's at and take another Uber to the hotel. You knew his room number from when you had to call the room one time. You knock on the door and he opens it, peaking out. Once he notices you he flings himself to you.

You embrace as he kisses all over your face. Giggling he looks at you "I missed you and I couldn't wait another month to see you" you tell him smiling. "Fuck sweets you don't know how crazy I've been going without you".

You start crying and he grabs your face while wiping your tears. "Oh baby please don't cry" he pulls you into the room and grabs your bag. You sit on his bed "I'm sorry" you start and wipe your nose. "I just missed your kiss so much it hurts". He tsks and sits next to you pulling you close.

"I'm here now" you lean your head listening to his heartbeat something that calmed you. He lifts your head "there's my pretty girl" he leans down and kisses you. "So how long are you here until" he asks and you look at him. "A week" he nods. "So tomorrow I'm calling in sick. There is no way we are leaving this room" he grins pulling into a deep kiss before laying you down.

He moans as your hands grab his hair. "Can't believe I haven't touched you in a month" he mumbles. You lean up to his ear " then touch me" he nods. He removes your jacket then reaches for your shirt while you kick off your shoes.

His hand roams your stomach before his lips touch your lips, his fingers lightly rub your nipples. You moan, his hand moves lower. His hand moves under your shorts and he gives a light rub while you lift your hips taking them off.

His hand finds your clit as his mouth is leaving kisses on your neck. A finger slides inside you and you moan. Then another is added and you are all but lifting off the bed. His thumb finds your clit. Your head falls back, eyes rolling at the pleasure. He moves lower before licking your clit. "Fuck Joe I missed you" you say and he moves still eating you out.

Once your legs begin to shake he pulls his mouth away and you whine. He stands and undresses. You stand pushing him on the bed. You fall to your knees and come face to face with his cock you missed so much. You grab it and give it a few tucks before slipping him in your mouth.

You moan as his hands push your head down. You gag as drool falls from the side of your mouth. Your makeup was already before but now you feel the tears hit, loving the moment. You feel him twitch before he pulls out.

He stands and moves you back to the bed. He lifts your legs, one on each shoulder as he enters you. Fuck you missed how he fills you up. He waits for you to adjust since it's been awhile then he begins fucking you. You let out a scream as your legs begin to shake again. "Fuck I've missed your dick" you yell and he moans. "Fuck I've missed this" he pants. "Fuck I'm so close" you scream. "The cum with me baby" he tells you and you both do.

Once your orgasm fades he pulls out of you and lays next to you. "I do not know how I'm ever gonna let you leave me" he says and your head hits his chest. "I don't know either" you look up at him. He kisses you. You deepen the kiss before straddling him. "Round two already" he asks smiling as you nod. You grab his dick and move it so he can enter you once again.

A week goes by and it's probably the hardest thing he had to do, watch you walk away. It nearly broke him. But he knew he would see you in a few weeks. But that didn't hurt any less.

[tlbodine]

Overthinking Goosebumps

It's been a long, ugly year for me. So I suppose it shouldn't be a surprise that I've be craving some intense comfort and nostalgia this fall. Which is, I think, why I found myself gripped by a sudden and intense desire to re-read the the Goosebumps books.

Like every horror-loving Millennial, I cut my teeth on R.L. Stine books. The Haunted Mask was the first chapter book I remember reading, checking it out from the library on a whim. I was 7 years old and completely enthralled.

I spent my weekly $5 allowance on Goosebumps as often as I could and read them from libraries all over the country as we traveled. I didn't have a complete set -- my interest waned by the end of the run, as I'd shifted over to Animorphs -- but I did have a couple dozen of them that I foolishly donated. I haven't touched one of these books in 20 years.

So when the craving hit, replacing my copies felt expensive and daunting. They're collector's items that are worth more than the $3.99 I paid for them in the first place. So I tried to quell my craving by watching videos of people who had done a "read every Goosebumps book challenge," except that just made me want to read them more.

Then I found a bunch of them in audio. They just so happen to be the perfect length to knock out in a day or two of commuting - 2-3 hours per book. A perfect indulgence. I started listening and discovered that not only was I enjoying myself, but that I even had some big thoughts! So, hell, why not blog it?

No promises that I'll blog about every one that I read, and no telling how far I'll make it into the series before my enthusiasm wears off, but for now...I'm overthinking Goosebumps.

So follow along at the "#overthinking goosebumps" tag and come tell me about YOUR experience with these books!

Some General Notes

There are a few things that are kind of a given for every Goosebumps book, which I'll acknowledge here so I don't have to re-tread the same ground over and over in future reviews:

Every chapter ends on a cliffhanger. A lot of those cliffhangers are fake "gotchas" and a lot of the stories rely heavily on practical joker characters in order to add some conflict. Sometimes this is more annoying than others, but I can't really fault Stine for doing it. These were pulpy books for young reluctant readers. When you're 7 years old, this kind of stuff keeps you engaged.

Every book has a twist. At least, most of them do. Some of these twists are better than others. I'll probably talk about a lot of them, but just...you have to go into this anticipating that a lot of these books are shaggy dog stories.

Adults are useless. That's just middle-grade fiction for you. Kids don't want to read about parents solving problems. They want to read about kids having cool adventures.

Oh yeah - I also may mention the TV show from time to time, but I was not much of a fan of the show. I know a lot of other people are nostalgic about it, but I didn't like it as a kid and it certainly hasn't aged well. The effects look cheap, the acting is uniformly terrible, and the episodes generally aren't well-adapted from the books. So sorry if I piss on your parade when I bring up episodes in relation to the books. The theme song is a banger though.

The average Goosebumps book is around 20-25k in length. Stine released a new one every month for the entirety of its 62-book run. He was writing these in a couple weeks. EDIT: Apparently he did employ some ghostwriters, which is news to me and makes me sad, but I still respect him anyway. His background in magazine and TV writing really shows through with these, both in terms of speed, process, and humor.

(I admire the hell out of R.L. Stine. I got to very briefly meet him at NYCC and thank him for his influence. It was great.)

Ok. Fangirl flexing over.

Looking forward to re-visiting these books and giving some of the ol' classic T.L. Bodine deep-dive treatment to them ;)

[megamindsecretlair]

20 Questions for Writers

Thank you for the tag @nerdieforpedro this was just the kick in the pants I needed to get more organized. LOL

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I started on Tumblr and I'm new to AO3 and have been too lazy to copy and paste all that LOL. I have 6 fics on AO3 and 65 on Tumblr, not counting individual series.

2. What is your total AO3 word count?

I'm........a little embarrassed to say lol. But it is 500,516. Oh chilleee, why though lmfaooooo. Listen, something unlocked in me with these fics and all these wonderful responses to my writing, okay?! I missed my teenage angsty fanfic years and I'm speedrunning through it for now okay?! Okay, I'll go hide now.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I started with Marvel but I've somehow morphed into a blog for gorgeous, gorgeous Black men who don't get nearly enough love. A sprinkling of white men. And a dash of Pedro and hopefully, Oscar because Moon Knight is my whole heart and I need him biblically.

4. Top Five fics by kudos:

WHEW. Going through Tumblr for this was ROUGH. Ya'll lucky my brain had time today.

You Understand Me Now : This had the highest notes of all my fics. And I keep getting asks to do more similar to this. But what ya'll looking for in this one?????

Sprung : I am surprised!! Out of all my Tyrone fics, I did not expect this to be so high. It was my first request and my first shy girl fic. Special place in my heart frfr.

Mr. Black, Part 1 : Nothing is more fun than watching the notes trickle down the further along in the series it is lol. Further proof that I write these for ME. But anywhooooo, I think this collectively unlocked something in all of us lol.

What's Your Favorite Scary Movie? : Lissen, it was spooky month, it was a full moon, I was FERAL for Ghostfast smut okay??!! I am actually surprised this is so high up and it's not more Tyrone on this list LOL

Runaway Lover, Part 1 : I did not expect to turn this into a mini-series, but here we are LOL. I can't deny ya'll nothing! This definitely stretched some muscles for me and I enjoyed challenging myself. Probably one of the few fics I just let flow and stopped berating myself for how long it was.

5. Do you respond to comments?

Absolutely! I love engaging with people and every single comment fills me with so much joy. I make every effort to respond to comments!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

OOF, the most??? Probably.....Through the Fire with Franklin Saint. That one still hurts ME to this day LOL.

Through the Fire

7. What is the fic you wrote that has the happiest ending?

Jeez, all my endings are pretty happy?? I can't really single any one out for being the most happy. I like happy couples round here.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope (and I knocked on wood). Thankfully everyone has been really kind and sweet about my work. It overwhelms me every single time.

9. Do you write smut?

All day, every day. I am a whore disguised as a barely functioning member of society LOL. I am a whore trapped in a slut wrapped up in a floosy. I am the slutty version of a Matryoshka, or Russian nesting dolls lmfaoooo.

10. Craziest Crossover?

Hmmmm, I haven't done any crazy crossovers yet. I should remedy that. That sounds like hella fun.

11. Have you ever have a fic stolen?

Nope, thank the LORDT. (I knocked on wood) Not that I've seen and no one has told me that it's been stolen. I take comfort in knowing that I am but a tiny island in the sea that is Tumblr and ain't nobody trynna steal my silly little stories. This is not an invitation, don't be an ass and steal. I will give you advice, I will teach you to write, I will read over your writing, whatever. Stealing is some basic bitch shit.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, not that I know of. It'd be interesting to see someone try to translate nigga or half the shit I say LOL.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

I have not but that sounds interesting! I have a teensy *coughalotlikealotalot* control issue, so it'd be interesting to see if my writing style meshes well with someone else.

14. All time favorite ship?

OOOOOF, this is hard. I just don't vibe with a lot of ships. Because these writers always break them up anyway. I like SydCarmy and Kanthony at the moment.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I pretty much finish (shut up lol) all my fics. There's a lot that I want to write but nerves or time does not permit. I'd die to write some Frank Castle, Dean Winchester, Matthew Lillard, Benedict Bridgerton....basically the folks on my white men roster. But they get enough attention.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Strengths?????! You want me to praise myself?? Nerdie, how could you LOL. But ummm......I think I do well with dialogue and chemistry. I feel like each reader is uniquely situated for each fic. I can write a lot, like too much at times.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I SUCK at descriptions. Lordt, that's my weakest point. Always has been lol. I be like sheeit, idk, they in a room getting busy, what more do you want from me??? LOL

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I like it and I respect it from other writers. Lends an extra layer of authenticity. But I do personally dislike when the translations are at the bottom of the fic. I'm not scrolling back and forth and by the time I get to the end, I done forgot what the hell it was supposed to be lol.

19. First Fandom you wrote in?

Marvel. Started with Loki. My love, my precious love. He started it all for me.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

No, I shan't shut up about Once Upon a December LOL. It's my favorite dammit. It's a sweet, gothic, romance from Prince Bucky. Like he can be my prince any fuckin' day.

This was fun and definitely learned some things about myself lol.

No pressure tags: @umber-cinders @harmshake @multiversefanfics @just4shyt3z @j0kers-light @slippinninque

[bunchashapes]

any music recs?

i could have made this very short or entirely too long. i opted for the latter:

HAVE YOU LOOKED FOR SOME NEW MUSIC TO LISTEN TO? LOOK NO FURTHER, FOR HERE IS

I know. There's a lot of music out there. Well have no fear, because I've selected, organized AND categorized a fine number of music selections, just for you! I tried to keep it to just stuff you probably haven't heard of before, but I make no promises. Hopefully you'll find at least one new thing you can take with you into 2023.

MAKE YOUR SELECTION:

1 - MIKE, I'M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO GROOVE TO. SOMETHING I CAN GET DOWN AND VIBE WITH OR PERHAPS LISTEN TO WHILE I WORK:

Sounds good! Let's start with a few of those:

Vulfpeck - Okay you may already know about Vulfpeck. Sorry. If you HAVEN'T, they're a wonderful group of dudes from Michigan that are all insanely talented. They have a wide-range of styles they cover and pretty much every member has gone on to do other solo stuff, which may also suit your interests. They also have a spin-off band called The Fearless Flyers that I'll cover a little further down.

Jacob Mann (As well as his Big Band) - Jacob's solo stuff has a nice laid-back feel to it, while his big band stuff is slightly more bombastic, but all of it is fun and groovy. Great example of a musician effectively switching between different toolsets, whether its a whole group of talented musicians at his disposal or just a bunch of nice Roland presets.

EMEFE - They haven't been very active lately but EMEFE is an incredible ensemble with plenty of amazing music for you to listen to. Their live album from 2017 makes me wish i could go back in time and watch it live.

Louis Cole - Louis Cole's also pretty popular, but maybe you haven't heard of him! Originally hailing from Knower, he's collaborated with a ton of musicians (including Vulfpeck AND Jacob Mann Big Band, mentioned above) as well as produced an impressive array of solo music. I can't understate how much I love this guy.

Thundercat - Know who else he's collaborated with? Thundercat. Have you listened to Thundercat? You should really do yourself a favor and listen to Thundercat.

Sammy Rae and The Friends - Only learned about Sammy Rae very recently but The Feeling (linked) was an earworm that lodged itself in my brain for months. Infectiously positive vibes, a great ensemble and really brilliant singing.

Silk Sonic - Okay they played at the Grammys so it definitely doesn't count as a deep cut but listen to Silk Sonic anyway okay? Okay.

2- MIKE I NEED SOMETHING THAT WHIPS ASS. SOMETHING TO COMPLETELY KNOCK MY SOCKS OFF.

Can do. Your metric of kickass may vary but at least one of these should work for you:

King Gizzard and The Wizard Lizard - King Gizz has put out such an unbelievable volume of music that it's hard to just recommend ONE thing from them. I've linked Nonagon Infinity, a great little album with the fun gimmick of seamlessly looping front to back. They really haven't put out a single bad album, so just go wild.

Royal Blood - Royal blood's bassist plays through an octave pedal, giving their stuff this fuckin' beefy sound that's well-rounded enough you'd never guess the band is just a bassist and a dummer. Their style has gotten poppier lately but it's still all worth listening to.

Tricot - Tricot's been around for around 10 years now and their stuff has only gotten better over time. I feel like Math Rock is kind of an obtuse genre for most people but their recent stuff is absolutely worth checking out even if that's not your usual sort of thing. Makkuro (真っ黒) is my favorite album of theirs by far.

Thank You Scientist - Stranger Heads Prevail is probably one of my favorite prog albums ever and you'll probably like it too. Insanely good ensemble (the amazing triple threat of sax/trumpet/violin is such an integral part of their sound) and really fun vocals.

Nova Collective - Another incredible prog group. As far as I know they've only put out one album but it whips ass.

Ask My Bull - These guys popped out of the woodwork a few years ago and I've been obsessed with them ever since, I can't wait to see what they do next. If you're a horn-loving freak like me you absolutely need to listen to them.

Fearless Flyers - The previously aforementioned Vulfpeck spin-off band, guest starring Mark Lettieri of Snarky Puppy and the incredible Nate Smith on drums. Their album Tailwinds is easily one of my favorite albums ever, the addition of a sax trio takes their stuff from incredible to legendary.

Daikaiju - Kaiju-themed surf rock. That's really all that needs saying.

3 - MIKE I NEED SOMETHING THAT'LL MAKE ME SAY "DAMN THAT'S COOL"

Well you're in luck! A wide range of things fit the bill:

Snarky Puppy - A powerhouse jazz/funk/rock ensemble full of insanely talented musicians. Just give this song a listen, you won't regret it.

The Dear Hunter - Dear Hunter (not Deerhunter. Different band) has remained my favorite band since high school. The band has a number of different projects, A collection of EPs for each color of the rainbow, a 5-part rock opera/narrative concept album (with a 6th part that may be a movie??) and other more straightforward albums that still cover a broad range of genres and styles. I think they're great and hopefully you will too.

Hiromi Uehara - Hiromi's probably my favorite pianist ever. Just watch that video. She's ridiculous. She also plays in an incredible trio and guest stars on my favorite Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra song! Preposterously talented and insanely fun to watch. I love her.

The Bad Plus - Speaking of great trios, you can't go wrong with The Bad Plus! Really vibrant arrangements and generally incredible musicianship throughout their work.

Esperanza Spalding - Obscenely talented bassist AND singer AND songwriter. As someone who sings and plays bass (not at the same time, of course) watching her do effortlessly do both at the same time is mesmerizing. I love her.

Chon - Chon's also pretty big now but I want you to imagine you're me at a Dear Hunter (see above) concert back in 2015 and one of the opening bands walks onstage and you're like "well okay what's these guys' deal" and then they start playing these fucking insane picking solos in perfect unison. I literally couldn't believe what I was seeing. I wish everyone could experience Chon through those eyes.

4 - MIKE THOSE ARE COOL AND ALL BUT WHAT I'M REALLY LOOKING FOR IS SOME MUSIC TO GET BUNDLED UP AND GO TO SLEEP TO

You need ambient? I got your ambient right here.

Hiroshi Yoshimura - I was first exposed to the wide, wide world of Japanese ambient music back in college and in all my years since then, few things have been able to beat Yoshimura's atmospheric soundscapes. If you need music to shut your brain off (and who doesn't, from time to time), look no further.

Chihei Hatakeyama - Another Japanese ambient powerhouse, Hatakeyama's got a huge discography of music and all of it will knock your lights out (very pleasantly).

Green-House - Very much inspired by Japanese ambient, Green-house is described as "music for plants". I only wish there was more of it.

Joep Beving - Not exactly an ambient artist but a masterful practitioner of minimal, atmospheric piano. His style is understated but filled with emotion, a great mix of more classical elements with a modern cinematic flair. Great to work to!

5- MIKE EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT JAPANESE CITY POP, JAZZ FUSION AND EARLY ELECTRONIC MUSIC BUT I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. GET ME ON THE GROUND FLOOR HERE

You got it boss:

Yellow Magic Orchestra - You've probably heard of these guys by now. I've only known about them for 6-ish years after they had a moderate burst of fame here but I think it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say these guys were one of the principle pieces of genetic memory that coalesced into the DNA of modern electronic music. All three of the principle members, Ryuichi Sakamoto, Haruomi Hosono and Yukihiro Takahashi (rest in peace) have all had really prolific solo careers in a ton of styles of music that are all worth your time.

T Square - An absolute titan of Japanese jazz fusion, their album Adventures is a veritable Rosetta Stone of video game music, directly inspiring a good number of video game songs including the dang mario brothers theme! Their stuff is an absolute joy to listen to.

Tatsuro Yamashita - Yamashita is often called the king of city pop and is (according to wikipedia) credited for pioneering Japanese "soft rock". Having grown up on the pacific coast, there's some ineffable truth in his schmaltzy surf music that touches me deep in my soul. You may not have the same experiences as I do, but I hope listening to him will allow you to tap into that divine spark and enjoy it for yourself.

Masayoshi Takanaka - Perhaps not quite as famous as Yamashita, Takanaka is a brilliant guitarist and musician known for that same schmaltzy pacific rock (just look at that damn guitar. I love him) as well as a number of other styles of rock and jazz fusion. He's got a huge discography and it's all incredible.

Casiopea - I would be remiss if I didn't mention Casiopea. I'm not an expert in Japanese music obviously, but I think it'd be fair to say they and T-Square are the two titans holding the glory of late 70's-early 80's jazz fusion like Atlas shouldering the world. Do yourself a favor and listen to Mint Jams.

Himiko Kikuchi - Truthfully I don't know much of Kikuchi's discography other than Flying Beagle (linked) but she absolutely killed it. Do yourself a favor and listen to that too.

6 - WELL MIKE THAT'S ALL WELL AND GOOD BUT WHAT IF I WANT SOMETHING WEIRD THAT DOESN'T FIT IN ANY OF THOSE CATEGORIES

I'm always happy to recommend unconventional stuff. Here's a few albums that I love to close us out:

Tom Waits - Alice - First of all, you should listen to Tom Waits. I know you know him as the Funny Voice Guy but he's had such an incredible musical career that starts great and only gets more and more amazing over time. Anyway, in the 90's, Tom and his wife (and writing partner since the 80's) Kathleen Brennan were scoring weird experimental musicals in Germany, namely The Black Rider (also worth listening to) and Alice. The musical is a strange extrapolation of Alice in Wonderland, namely inspired by Charles Dodgson's (Lewis Carroll) relationship with Alice Liddell, generally accepted as the real-life inspiration for Alice. Though the actual specifics of their relationship are uncertain, the age discrepancy and Charles' general fixation with Alice leads many to assume....the worst about their relationship, an interpretation the musical runs with. The actual musical is hard to find evidence of (there's some documentary footage from the 90's and I've found the script) but Tom rearranged his music for the show and released it in 2002, which in my eyes is the definitive version of the music. The album is unbelievably melancholic, heart-wrenching, at times deeply uncomfortable, and absolutely filled with beauty. Lost in the Harbor is maybe one of my favorite songs of all time. If ANY of this sounds even slightly interesting to you, I implore you to check it out. It also has Colin Stetson on saxophone and clarinet, which segues quite nicely to the next album.....

Colin Stetson - New History Warfare Vol. 2 - You may have actually heard Colin's music before, he's scored films like Hereditary, Color Out Of Space and the newest Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie. New History Warfare is one of his experimental solo projects, most characterized by Stetson recording basically everything in a huge room filled with microphones, creating this incredible impression of scale. It's filled with some of the craziest shit I've ever heard someone do on a saxophone; long, galloping phrases with no pauses for air thanks to circular breathing, mixing in the sound of the valves opening and closing, and an incredible unnatural-sounding delay all achieved with live recording. The Righteous Wrath of An Honorable Man is one of the coolest things I've ever heard in my life (you've probably already heard it before) but the whole album is absolutely captivating.

Caroline Shaw - Partita for 8 Voices - Caroline Shaw is an amazing musician, singer and composer. All of her stuff is really beautiful and worth listening to, but few things stand out as much as this composition, written for and performed by a cappella group Roomful of Teeth (which is probably the sickest possible name for a choral group). I feel like a cappella music has a woefully bland perception among most people (thanks in no small part to Pitch Perfect); all lavish arrangements of pop music with absolutely no soul. If this is what you think all a cappella music is, I urge you to listen to this album. It's a masterful blend of speech, song and energy, filled with a vibrancy and passion I have a difficult time putting into words. You really just have to listen to it.

[betweenthings2]

gatty “we are so lucky to have you” would be so perfect

Thank you for the ask!! The prompt list is here if anyone else would like to see it =) I know my promised one month turn around on prompts has truly fallen apart, but I do love them and I have so much fun writing them and I very much appreciate you guys sending them to me.

Words of affirmation- "We are so lucky to have you."

The sound of the clock is the only thing George can focus on. It's too loud, too much, especially in the small, quiet room. His desk is under a big window that overlooks their back yard and he can see Matty, smiling and playing fetch with Mayhem, pausing periodically to scratch the dog behind his ears and push curls out of his own face. George wishes he were down there, too, but he'd agreed with Matty on an ambitious timeline and now nothing is going like he wants it. Things had been better earlier in the day, when Matty was here, too, sitting on the floor with a guitar and listening, but he, and Mayhem, got restless and George sent them both outside.

He regrets that now and the clock is still too fucking loud. George is half tempted to take it down and just throw it at the wall, anything to get it to shut up, but he doesn't. Instead, he gets it down and takes the batteries out, leaving everything sitting on the edge of the desk. The ticking sound seems to echo for a few moments, then it's blissfully quiet. Still when he sits back down to keep working, nothing really works right and his gaze keeps wandering out the window to Matty and Mayhem. They look happy.

Despite knowing Matty had promised to come back when he'd left, George can't help but jump slightly when Matty knocks on the doorframe to announce his return. He stays there until George pauses what he's working on and turns to  invite him in. Matty's been making an effort about respecting George's space when he's working. George has mixed feelings about that--on one hand it's nice to have the space and time to focus, but on the other, he likes having Matty around, even if he is quick to get bored or restless.

"What'd the clock ever do to you?" Matty asks, crossing the room.

George shrugs. "Saw you guys outside," he offers.

Matty smiles. "Was probably for the best that you got tired of us."

"I didn't get tired of you," George protests. "You got bored and Mayhem wanted to go out."

"Whatever you say," Matty agrees. "I thought about making dinner, but then I remembered the last time I tried to cook, so I've brought tea," he raises the mug slightly, "and I've ordered takeaway from that Indian place. Mayhem and I are gonna walk down as get it. How's it goin'?"

"I'm just making it worse at this point," George mutters, glancing at his laptop then back to Matty.

Matty frowns sets the mug he's carrying on the desk and reaches out to cradle Georges jaw, thumb brushing over his cheekbone. "That's not true, love. I'm pretty sure you'd have to work to make something worse," he says. "Lemme hear?"

"Yeah, ok," George agrees. He pulls up the track that he'd been working on and plays in from the beginning, studying Matty for any kind of reaction while he listens. When it's over he says, "Dunno what's wrong with it, 's just not doing what it's supposed to."

Matty nods. "You haven't made it worse," is what he starts with, "but I see what you mean. Let me think on it?"

"Think on it all you want, but it's all like that." George sighs. "We should have someone else do this. I don't know why we thought I was the person to do this."

"First of all," Matty starts, "we are so lucky to have you. So, so lucky. Second of all, I'm absolutely certain that you are the best person to do this. You wanna come pick up the takeaway with us?"

George shakes his head. "We're on a deadline."

"The deadline is bullshit. I came up with the deadline and every time I come up with a deadline we end up pushing it back, and there's no point in you sitting here and making yourself miserable. Come for a walk. You'll feel better. You can go back to being miserable after if you want."

"Do you think that maybe that's why we end up pushing things back?" George asks. "Because you don't take your own deadlines seriously?"

Matty shrugs, but he says, "That sounds like something my therapist would say which is a little bit weird for me, so no more saying wise things, just get up and come with me."

"Alright," George agrees, letting Matty urge him to his feet and lead him out of the room and downstairs. Much to his chagrin, he feels better just getting up and moving a little bit, and he says, "Are you gonna be insufferable if I say you were right?"

"Insufferable, probably not," Matty answers. "A little obnoxious, probably."

George can't help but laugh and he pauses before pulling his shoes on to pull Matty close and say, "Thank you."

Matty tugs him down for a kiss then says, "Always."

[foster-the-world]

Why do I get my hopes up

Remember how I thought they found a special ed provider? Well I was wrong. I signed the authorization form but now there is no start date. Lots of emails, phone calls, no response except "I emailed and haven't heard from them."

Now I have to do the due process hearing tomorrow. I'm glad I had the foresight not to cancel. But I would have prepared a great deal more. Dreading every second of it. Taking unpaid leave off work since I haven't earned leave, yet. Which adds insult to injury.

Also, baby boy had a big outburst yesterday. Knocking over chairs, not listening, etc. He's high energy but this is not normal. He's been doing well in school. Had his parent teacher conference last week- nothing like that mentioned at all. All good reports on his benchmarks - letters, etc. Teacher said "she loved him." A week back she told my husband intelligence wise he's "#1 in the class." Probably not appropriate to say but not bad to hear. Last night we made a big deal out of his bad behavior. Not much we can do but talk to him but we talked a lot. Today we got our first call home about the same bad behavior. He was climbing on the book shelf, running out of the class, threw a milk bottle down. He hasn't done this all year. Nothing at all has changed at home. It's daylight savings time but he still got his normal 12 hours of sleep last night. At a loss for what to do. I told the teacher I could come get him but I'm afraid it would make him do it again. He likes school but his preference is always to be with me. She said they didn't want that. Tonight we tried not mentioning the bad behavior at all. We are wondering if making a big deal out of it somehow perversely makes him do it again. Talking about it certainly didn't help. Not saying its a good idea we just don't know what else to do. He was an angel at home and the playground. Sharing his toys, making new friends, etc, etc.

Emailed the school assistant principal, counselor, teacher, etc. Said we would love to work together to come up with a solution. Cc'd the special ed lady who is supposed to find him providers. Explained in the email they haven't found him providers and hoped that she would provide insight. No response so far. Blah.

If he keeps acting like that at school we will have to pull him out. Its a public school so they can't kick him out (or at least not easily) but we aren't going to let him make his teachers/classmates miserable. They deserve a safe, calm classroom. I guess we would try to find a daytime sitter. We have a few options.

Before that we are thinking we will pay the crazy, insane amount of money for a special ed provider out of pocket if the hearing does not go our way tomorrow. Ten hours per week will cost roughly the same as my take home pay as a full-time nurse. We had talked about paying for four hours - which was more manageable in our budget. But with this kind of behavior that won't be enough. In theory, it will only be for three months.

If I had a really stressful job I would be considering giving it up, if this behavior continues. It seems like a full time job trying to get these services and he could stay home with me until we figure it out. Financially, we could afford for me to stay home another yearish based off the money we made selling our home. However, this job will eventually be a really good job as a parent. There will always be time for me to do some family logistic stuff during the day. At some point I can work from home two days a week. Once sick leave/PTO kicks in I'll have a lot. FMLA benefits are generous. I have a union. In the long run I'm sure I could negotiate time off to figure out his needs if it so requires. Its just a shitty time for all of this to be going down because I only started six weeks ago. Not to mention I want to work. I went to nursing school for a reason. So far, I really like the work. I started trying to get him services last May. How in the world does he still only have a half hour out of the 13 hours he is assigned? Its all so depressing.

[val-writesstuff]

Dear Diary

Prologue

Summary: Your brother and his best friend that you're secretly in love with, go missing. Peggy thinks somehow you’ll be able to find them. Will you find them, or will you lose yourself in the process?

wc:1.1k

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

a/n: Am I starting a new series to procrastinate from my other one? Maybe. My brain doesn't listen when I tell it to focus on one thing, so here ya go.

Italics are writing

Main Masterlist | Series Masterlist | Taglist form

Dear Diary

It's been a month since Steve disappeared. With him gone, nothing feels real. It feels like I'm drifting through life. I haven't felt like this since our mom died, Steve and Bucky were the only ones who could bring me back and now they're both gone.

Gone, not dead. Neither of my boys came home, neither had bodies. I think that might be worse, the not knowing. They could be stranded somewhere, freezing, and injured. I wish I could help them, wherever they are.

It’s weird being in this house alone. I don't go out anymore. I spend most of my days wrapped in my bed. I’ve been too scared to enter his room or move his stuff, what if he comes home and everything he knew is gone?

Peggy keeps coming by the house. She brings groceries, she cooks for me. Sometimes we sit and have tea together. She used to try to make small talk, but the past few days she just looked nervous around me. I know she feels bad about what happened but I can't help but blame her a little.

Our lives used to be relatively normal. Then Steve somehow gets into the army which, I know was his dream but it was crazy. I hoped they’d give him something easier like being a medic or something but he sends me a letter saying he's going to be experimented on. I didn't hear from him for a long time after that. Then ‘Captain America’ starts going around doing shows. I guess he was busy entertaining the masses. The next letter i got, he said something had happened to bucky and he was going to rescue him.

Then I got a knock on the door. Peggy herself was standing on my doorstep. I had never met her before but from the look on her face, I knew something had happened. Diary, I’m not proud of what happened next. There was a lot of screaming and crying, mostly from me. I know you'll say it's not very ladylike, but when have I cared about that before?

I still hate her a little, even if she's not the reason he joined. She got him involved in the stuff that got him killed. Got bucky killed too. I don't know if I’ll ever forgive her.

When I hear the knocking on the door I know it's her. I close up my diary and shove it back on the shelf before I open the door. Her smile wavers a little and I take a step back to let her in the apartment. I close the door behind her and busy myself with making tea so I don’t have to look at her.

I hear her sit at the table and take a deep breath before she finally says something. “Listen, I know I keep showing up and I'm probably the last person you want to see right now-” I scoff as I set the tea on the table and sit across from her. “But this time I'm here to suggest something and it's going to sound a little crazy, so please don't kick me out yet.”

From what I knew of her, Peggy’s version of crazy could be ‘come out and have a drink with me and some of the guys your brother knew’ or ‘Come get injected with an untested serum so you can fight bad guys.” Neither option sounds great right about now. 

“Your brother told me about you. He told me about the things you can do, and how you're special in ways others aren't.” 

“I don't know what he said but you have to believe me when I say it's not true.” I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. “Stevie has always had a very active imagination.” I tried to muster up a chuckle as I rambled about my brother. “It's probably from all his time locked inside. You know he used to get sick easily? So, mom, wouldn't let him go play with the other kids. He’d spend all his time reading fairytales or drawing them and-”

She leaned in close and whispered as if somebody might overhear her. “He told me because he thought you could help us. He knew if anybody could get you in, it’d be me. He told me how you always used to take care of him, he wanted to take care of you.” 

I cross my arms and glare at her. “He had no right to tell you that. You shouldn't know about that.”

“You might be right, but I'm glad he told me. I want you to do a job for me. My little team wants to search for them, Barnes and Steve. I convinced them you're the right person for the job.” Now I knew why she had looked so nervous recently, she was offering me a small ray of hope in the darkness.

“That sounds great and all but I don't have any experience with this kind of thing. My abilities wouldn't be of any help to you.” I didn't like the idea of anybody knowing what I could do, but if it helped find Bucky or Steve I’d do whatever I could.

“Dear diary…” I mutter as I pull my coat tighter around me as the wind blows snow in my face. “Today I get to explore the middle of nowhere because my stupid brother's insane girlfriend thought it would be wise to send me out here after a month of training. Truly a match made in heaven, those two.”

“I know it seems impossible but you're their only hope.” Peggy's voice crackled out of the portable radio I was clutching in my hand. “Howard's equipment picked up activity out there and we have high hopes it's him.” 

“Peggy I admire your optimism, I do.” I sighed as I paused and looked around. All I could see was whirling snow and rocky cliffs. “But it's been months… He fell off a train for god's sake. On the off chance he is alive, he would've had to survive with probably very serious injuries and no rations. If he found a way to do that…I don't think he’d still be himself.”

“Please, you have to find him.” I could hear her voice crack even through the static of the radio. I knew she wanted me to do this so she’d have a justifiable reason to send me after Steve, that's what she wanted. 

In the distance, I saw something silver glint in the sun and I took off running toward it. I fell to my knees as I pulled a pair of dog tags on a chain out of the snow. “Peggy I found-” my body couldn't decide if I wanted to sob or laugh. He was somewhere out here and he had survived the fall.

I was so distracted by what I found I never noticed the man creeping up behind me. Didn't realize I wasn’t alone until I felt the sharp pain of a needle in my neck.

Remember, likes are nice but reblogs/feedback are golden!

Tagging people i think might be interested (unless you ask/fill the taglist form, i will not tag you in future posts): @wakandabiitch2 @james-bucky-barnes-bitch @piperstofu101 @holyhumorliteraturelight @moonlissworld @matchat3a @vicmc624 @hw-shorty @juliapowers @jobean12-blog @jamesbuchananbarnesslut @buckyownsmylife @cjand10

[ace930615]

IMPORTANT PLEASE READDDD

Hey guys, unfortunately I'm going to have to take a hiatus for awhile :-( a lot is going on in my personal life with school and work, and as of recently a few weeks back around Christmas my grandmother caught covid and it really knocked her down and made her extremely weak. She can't really walk anymore, needs oxygen, has bowel incontinence, and dementia. She was in the hospital until about a week ago and was going to be living with my family for the time being until we figured out exactly what my nana needs. I honestly dont know why they discharged her because ... man she was still really bad and they knew that she wouldn't have a nurse to come to our house yet! She was residing in my sisters room while my sister moved into our father's office. My sister and i were taking care of her full time for a week, which was extremely stressful. My sister and i had to make sure she was eating/drinking, cleaning up after her (changing her diaper) constantly changing her sheets and making sure she wasn't taking her catheter or diaper off because she kept doing it lmfao. My sister and i told our dad she absolutely needs more assistance than what my sister and i were providing her, we couldn't even get her properly clean like in the bath since she still had a catheter and could barely move we would have to wipe her down! She started to get sick again and we brought her back to the hospital (which she ended up falling and hitting her head). They tried to discharge her back to our house again but eventually my dad got them to discharge her to a nursing home. She's about an hour away, and might need to go to more of a facility/rehab rather than an elderly home because of how sick she is. It's not something we can exactly afford, its going to take whatever little money she gets by the government (since shes not working obviously) and whatever medical/insurance can cover. There really isnt any other choice, we dont have anyone in the family who can dedicated 100% of their time taking care of her (which would have probably been my mom but shes dead), even then my nana would probably still need a nurse constantly if she were to live at our house. My dad and i have been dealing with her insurance since some of it is in my name, and we found out she stopped paying her bills months ago. This isnt surprising considering how downhill she has gone, even before she was sick but my dad wouldnt listen to my sister and i who were still taking care of her weekly because she just got so weak while she still lived in her apartment (due to old age and a number of medical issues). My nana is also incredibly stubborn and did not want to move out of her apartment for as long as she could. She still thinks she can go back but obviously not. So its been really messy! Really messy and stressful and sad LOL. On top I am also having computer issues which is preventing me from saving any art I draw, which honestly im probably just going to have to get a new computer at this point. If you have commissioned me please reach out, I will also be sending messages when i can to my commissioners and we can further discuss it. I am open to refunds at this time! Unless you are willing to wait until i come back, which could be a few months. I absolutely cannot focus on art professionally right now due to these circumstances. I haven't felt this since my mom got sick and passed away in 2016 so it's really... taking a toll on me and my family. Im sorry if this post is a mess there is so much more to this situation and its so complicated i tried to just go over the most important stuff. Thank you guys again. I will be back soon!