#i have no idea what this story is honestly
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whywoulditho · 19 hours ago
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I'm so happy to see the Turkish one here because it's honestly ridicilous 😭
My parents actually said the whole thing before every story when I was little, so I remember never being able to focus on the actual story because I would just sit there wondering what the fuck that intro meant. What do you mean when I rocked my baby grandmother's cradle?? The fleas were barbers??? What the hell even is a town crier??
For everyone on the notes who were confused how we remember the whole thing, the original version rhymes and has a really nice flow so it's easy to remember. But I really wanna know how they came up with this thing too. It's really old and has camels in it, so my only good guess is that it must be from the Ottoman times when our land was connected to the Arabian peninsula, because camels aren't native to Anatolia where the Turks mostly lived. But that's all, I have no idea how or where or when this thing was created.
“once upon a time” in other languages
korean: “back when tigers used to smoke” (호랑이 담배 피우던 시절에) [x]
czech: “beyond seven mountain ranges, beyond seven rivers” (za sedmero horami a sedmero řekami)
georgian: “there was, and there was not, there was…” (იყო და არა იყო რა, იყო…)
hausa: “a story, a story. let it go, let it come.” [x]
romanian: “there once was, (as never before)… because if there wasn’t, it wouldn’t have been to told” (A fost odată, ca niciodată că dacă n-ar fi fost, nu s-ar mai povesti…)
lithuanian: “beyond nine seas, beyond nine lagoons: (už devynių jūrų, už devynių marių)
catalan: “see it here that in that time in which beasts spoke and people were silent…” (vet aquí que en aquell temps que les bèsties parlaven i les persones callaven…) [x]
turkish: “Once there was, and once there wasn’t. In the long-distant days of yore, when haystacks winnowed sieves, when genies played jereed in the old bathhouse, [when] fleas were barbers, [when] camels were town criers, [and when] I softly rocked my baby grandmother to sleep in her creaking cradle, there was/lived, in an exotic land, far, far away, a/an…* (Bir varmış, bir yokmuş. Evvel zaman içinde, kalbur saman içinde, cinler cirit oynar iken eski hamam içinde, pireler berber [iken], develer tellal [iken], ben ninemin beşiğini tıngır mıngır sallar iken, uzak diyarların birinde…)
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gyeomsweetgyeom · 1 day ago
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women in male fields
fratboy!jaehyun x reader
summary: you’re fully aware you’re dating a reformed fuckboy/fratiest fratboy to exist but that doesn’t mean he can get away with acting like a douche without a taste of his own medicine… OR the 3 times sweetheart finds herself acting like a fuckboy and the 1 time Jaehyun calls her out
word count: 3.5k
warnings: swearing, fuckboy behavior, mentions of alcohol, Americanized college described (l'm American), pet names (sweetie, sweets, sweeteart, sweet girl) in order to avoid using y/n, Imk if I missed anything!
a/n: there was something completely magical in my Chili’s triple dipper because I sat down and pounded this out for 4 hours with minimal breaks! I’d had this idea for a while but figured I’d get it out before everyone forgot about the #womeninmalefields TikTok trend. Feedback is appreciated!
Timeline-wise let’s say this is about 4-6 months into Jae and Sweetheart being a couple
This story is a part of my fratboy!Jaehyun universe!
dividers from cafekitsune
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You weren’t stupid. You knew what you were getting into when you started dating Jung Jaehyun, one of the most fratboy fratboys to ever exist. You had been around for the parties, for the handful of nights where he overdid it and got sick, countless nights of standing by to watch him play beer pong, no dates on Sunday evenings because of frat meetings, and a couple philanthropic events. You were used to a lot of it by now. 
But your boyfriend had adapted himself so well to this role that you honestly kind of hated some of his behaviors. He had changed some habits, of course. He was no longer the fuckboy fratboy that slept around, no, he was committed to you and you alone. He made some effort into being romantic which took some work since his idea of romance was sending you a daily Snapchat for your streak with a red heart. Gross. Now, he got you flowers occasionally and your favorite snacks. His room used to be an absolute pigsty and now he at the very least he shoved his mess under the bed so you didn’t see.
Then there were some habits that didn’t change and you were tired of them. Beyond tired of them. You were tired of him passively listening, barely paying attention to you, being kind of an asshole, and just being a gross guy. So you decided to give him a taste of his own medicine. If he could do all these things and you could still like him, why wouldn't he still like you?
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It had started when you texted Jaehyun on a Thursday afternoon and he didn’t respond until Saturday afternoon. It had been nothing urgent, but you were still annoyed. It wasn’t the first time he’d done this. In fact, it was a horrible habit of his. He started a conversation or read a text you sent and just never responded. You knew now, based on experience and the other guys telling you, that Jaehyun sucked at texting. He would still post on Instagram or Snapchat, posting various athletes like they were his friends and promoting frat activities like normal. It was almost like he forgot that the primary function of a phone was to communicate. Good thing he was pretty!
It didn’t make it any less annoying that your boyfriend didn't care to change this habit for you though, so when he finally texted you back, you decided to give him the same treatment. Saturday came to an end and you didn’t text back. Sunday was the same and so was Monday. He texted you countless times, so many questions, random updates on his day, and asking you if you were ok or if he should send help to your dorm. So when you knocked on the door Tuesday afternoon scrolling on your phone when Jaehyun opened the door. It was pretty safe to say he was pretty confused.
“Where have you been? You didn’t answer any of my texts,” Jaehyun asked while he led the two of you upstairs.
You hummed noncommittally, your eyes not leaving the screen of your phone, “oh yeah, my phone broke. My bad.”
Jaehyun opened his mouth to argue, ready to tell you that he had seen you posting on your stories, your phone didn’t look new, and he had heard you on FaceTime with Haechan just yesterday. That you were literally scrolling through Instagram when he opened the door, but he didn’t say anything. He just pulled you into his arms, and pulled up the most recent episode of one of your shows. 
He couldn’t really complain if you were here with him now, right? You were in his bed, in his arms, laying on his chest. Everything was fine. A few days of no contact was normal and you both had a good enough relationship where it shouldn’t bother him, right? But it did…
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The next time Jaehyun pissed you off was just a week later. He had proven to be a little extra clingy after his punishment of silence and that was good enough for you. It had been enough to hold you off with some of his, less than perfect behavior, until the next time he messed up. Sure, enough it was just 7 days later when he acted stupid again. And it was time for him to learn again. Sometimes he just had to learn to not do something by doing it and learning the consequences. Like a child… or a pet.
Jaehyun had had a stressful week. You knew that, he had told you about it the last time you saw him just yesterday, so you did feel kinda bad for deciding to pull this out of your sleeve now. How was he going to learn if you never tried to fix it though?
Jaehyun was pacing around his room, running a hand down his face and staring at the email that basically told him nothing from their partner sorority. He was social chair, so he was in charge of planning mixers. That’s exactly what he was trying to do! But the Kappa social chair was either knowingly being a pain in the ass or just naturally was a pain in the ass. How was it useful for Jaehyun to know when a handful of sisters all had an astronomy class?! Why did that matter when he was asking her to choose from a handful of dates he’d already chosen?!
Not only was this sorority social chair being annoying, Taeyong had been on his ass to plan some kind of sponsored philanthropic event, but everyone Nu Chi had worked with previously was being so difficult! No one was returning a single one of his emails, he spent his afternoons on hold or making calls, and just getting in contact with new companies and vendors just took so much effort. He currently had one sponsor, which was fine, whatever. But nothing Nu Chi Theta did while Jaehyun was social chair was ever just fine. Fine was acceptable for Alpha Sig’s but not for Nu Chi’s. He would need at least two more sponsors to reach the level of finery he was used to working with.
So that’s what Jaehyun was texting you about, his fingers tapping across the small screen of his phone while he put all his ranting and raving into words and sent off the text with a sigh of relief. You would talk him down, get him through his stress, and give him some advice for his problems. Then he’d feel like a new man, ready to tackle his problems with a clear head just like you always did for him. Just the thought of your advice had him smiling down at his phone while he added ‘sorry, about that. had to vent. how was your day sweets?’ and sent it your way.
On your end, you read through the long text ready to reply and give him some advice and offer your own help, but then you remembered… You remembered how just a few days ago you were venting to him about a small argument you and Ari, your roommate, had gotten into, and he showed no signs of actually listening. You went to him for a reason! He had at least 10 roommates, he never had complaints about any of them, so it wasn’t like you were talking just to talk! You wanted your boyfriend to give you some advice like you always gave him, but all you got was a “damn... Wanna order me some wings?” You had to physically keep jaw from dropping. God, he could be such a fucking guy sometimes! It was like talking to a fucking wall! Albeit a very good looking, handsome wall, but a wall nonetheless.
It was time for him to get yet another taste of his own medicine. Instead of taking the time to offer your advice or offer your help, you smirked, staring at your screen as you typed out, ‘that sucks’. Next text, ‘My day was chill, kinda hungry … send me door dash?’
On his end, Jaehyun stared at the screen with blatant confusion, watching as the minutes ticked by while he waited for some long paragraph with solutions and encouragement to be sent his way. After five minutes nothing came. The same after 10. No change after 20 and then he sets his phone aside feeling grumpy and pissy. Why wasn’t his girlfriend helping him? Did you even read his message?
And he couldn’t exactly call you out on it because it wasn’t an issue between the both of you. They were problems he had before you guys were together sure, but he liked having you to lean on now. He sighed tiredly, resting his chin atop his folded arms with a pout while staring at his dark screen and willing you to text him back again so all his issues would be just one step closer to being fixed.
His heart skipped a beat when the screen lit up and he saw the familiar combination of emojis used for your contact. He reached for his phone eagerly, feeling his heart soar at the anticipated text where you would help him solve his issues. But his face fell into a frown and he groaned out loudly at the words on his screen: ‘is my food on its way yet?’
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The last reciprocation of his fuckboy energy was probably the worst. You honestly don’t know how you let Jaehyun get away with it practically unscathed, but karma was coming around now and she wasn’t merciful. It was your pièce de résistance, the cherry on top of your fuckboy sundae, your magnum opus, your masterpiece. 
To give Jaehyun some credit, it had been a while since he had dated a woman for a long period of time, or really, dated any woman at all. Maybe he had forgotten some very basic decorum and manners as far as ways to act and things to say or not say. Just yesterday you had been complaining about your professor being very vague in the instructions for your assignment, and even more vague when you emailed him to ask for clarity. “Like the instructions make it sound so simple, but it can’t be that simple if this project accounts for 30% of our grade! Like hello, is it hard to reply to an email with words that actually fucking mean something?” You groaned, running your fingers through your hair while you texted your project group chat what your professor had replied.
Jaehyun chuckled, running a calming hand down your back, focusing his relaxing touch on your lower back as his fingers kneaded at your muscles, “chill out sweetheart, I think you’re making this a bigger deal than it actually is.”
You sent him an unamused look from the corner of your eye, “chill out? Jae, I just said this project accounts for a third of my grade. I can’t be chill about this.”
He pressed a kiss to your cheek, then your neck, then your shoulder, “are you… you know?”
Your fingers froze over your keyboard, waiting for his next words, giving him a chance to backtrack. He stayed silent and waited patiently. You exhaled, speaking in a voice that was all too eerily calm, “Am I what, Jaehyun?”
“Are you on your period? You just seem extra worked up about something kind of pointless.” He replied casually, his fingers continuing to work at your lower back. The exact area you had once confessed hurt you so bad you could barely stand in the first couple days of your period. This- somewhat thoughtful- little shit!
You smacked his hands away while you closed your laptop and gathered your things in a hurry, mumbling, “you’re such an asshole sometimes.”
Jaehyun stared at you in shock, an asshole? He was being an asshole for caring about his girlfriend’s well-being? “Sweetheart, it’s just that you seem to be making a bigger deal out of this than it actually is,” he tried to explain.
You held a hand up, silencing him, ”every time you open your mouth, you dig yourself into a deeper hole. No, I’m not on my period. Yes, it is a big deal and yes, I’m actually leaving. Good night and goodbye.”
This very conversation had been playing on repeat in your mind while Jaehyun vented to you about Johnny being up his ass about new recruits being low as he paced around his room. “I mean, it shouldn’t be solely on my shoulders if recruits are low. There are plenty of brothers who don’t have as many responsibilities as I do. Like, I barely figured out the whole sponsored mess with Taeyong and now Johnny decided to stick his foot up my ass too. Can I get a fucking break or something?!” He ranted passionately.
You stared at him blankly from your seated position on his bed, forcing your smirk to stay hidden. “Is it… you know?” You began to ask.
“Is it stressful? Hell yeah it is, I mean shouldn't we have any and all brothers taking turns trying to recruit. I mean that’s why I take my time to throw mixers, parties, and sponsored events that kick ass so that people want to join,” Jaehyun replied with a tired sigh.
“No,” you laughed softly, “is it like your time of the month? You seem to be making a big deal out of nothing?”
When Jaehyun turned to you with his eyes wide in astonishment, he expected to see you laughing it off playfully. He expected for you to confess that you were just kidding and kiss him sweetly. But you cocked your head to the side and raised a brow as if to ask, ‘what’s the problem?’
After that, Jaehyun was quick to rise to his feet, pinning you with a heated stare. “What the hell has been up with you? You've been acting… grimy for like the last month.”
You laughed in astonishment, “I’ve been acting grimy? Huh, then imagine how I feel on a regular basis!”
“You?! Sweets, you’ve been acting like a douche! Like when you didn’t respond to me for days even though you were posting like normal and you lied about your phone being broken! Like, hello! You were on Instagram right in front of my face with the same crack on your screen since I’ve known you!”
You raised a brow, holding back an amused smirk, “that’s all? I don’t reply for a couple days and now I’m a douche? Babe, you’re being like really emotional right now, calm down.”
“And that too!” Jaehyun exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger at you, “why are you asking me if it’s my time of the month when I’m talking about something that’s bothering me? I want you to support me. You did the same thing when I texted you looking for advice when I was handling the whole mixers and sponsors thing.”
You shrugged nonchalantly, “well, I don’t know what you want me to say right now.”
Jaehyun raised his brows and shook his head as if he couldn’t believe what the hell he was hearing. Was he in some kind of alternate universe? Had aliens come down and planted worms in your brain? What happened to his sweet girlfriend?! “Well, an apology would be really nice,” he replies while cocking his head at you.
“And have you ever apologized to me for any of that same behavior?” You ask in a calm voice.
“Wha- me apologize?! This isn’t about me! It’s about you!”
“Oh, so it’s only a problem when I act like this and not you? Got it.”
“When?! When have I acted like you?” Jaehyun asks in exasperation, eyes wide with shocked confusion.
“Hmmm. Let me think!” You exclaim before dramatically placing the tip of your finger on your chin, “just like everyday we’ve been together, you dummy!”
“Give me examples. I can’t believe this.”
“Alright, how about how I’ve had to train you like some kind of pet to learn some very basic texting etiquette? I let you get away with being a shitty texter for months and the one time I do it, you go crazy. I got used to not getting a response from you after days on end and I act like you did one time and you almost call campus security to my dorm to see if I’m alive,” you state, counting out a single finger. 
With the next finger, “I come to you for advice regarding my single roommate considering you have like a hundred of them, and what do you do? You say, damn, buy me wings? Who the fuck does that?! So it didn’t feel very good when I did it to you, huh? Did you like looking for advice only to be hit with some bullshit response and then asked for food? Which I never got by the way!”
Third finger, “And just now. Oh no, did you not like being told your issue meant nothing? Awww, mmmm, are you sad?” You pull your face into a very sarcastic sad face, “now imagine how I feel when you asked me if I was on my fucking period?! Like, have you never been around someone with a vagina? Even Mark and Haechan who barely pull know better than to ask some shit like that! And these are just three of your douchebag behaviors! Shall I continue, Mr. so called I’m-perfect-and-can-never-make-mistakes-because-that-would-be-impossible!”
Jaehyun stood speechless. Was he really that bad? Well, clearly he was. He had to admit he didn’t think he was this bad. He had been really good about adapting to his new role as a boyfriend and thought everything else that came his way was just going to be easy to handle. Apparently, he hadn’t handled it all the right way.
“I didn’t realize I was this bad, I’m sorry. Wow,” Jaehyun sighed, sitting on the bed with his folded over his mouth, “sweetheart, I’m really sorry.”
But that was another way Jaehyun had adapted. He didn’t start arguments while being hard headed, he listened when the issue was serious, he accepted wrong doing, and made changes. 
You crawled across his bed, sitting beside him and laying your head on his shoulder, “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have been petty. I should have told you these things bothered me in the moment instead of using them against you… but it was kinda fun.”
Jaehyun rested his head atop yours and chuckled softly, “I think I’m really glad you’re not one of the frat guys because we’d always have girls in here yelling about you gaslighting them. How did you handle me doing this for so long?”
“It helps that you listen when it matters. You’re sweet, you can be romantic, you care about me, you make an effort for me, I can tell you’re trying to be better for me even if it doesn’t all come easily for me,” you explain in a calm voice, “and you’re hot as hell, the abs don’t stop, and you keep that body nice and tight for mama, don't you baby boy?”
Your cackle rings out across his room while he jumps away from you with flushed cheeks. “Don’t… don’t talk like that. It’s totally freaking me out!”
“Come on, babe,” you tease while deepening your voice playfully, “bring me that ass.” 
You manage to grab him while he tries, and fails, to jump away. You playfully knead his (lack of) ass while grinning up at him. You pucker your lips, to which Jaehyun playfully rolls his eyes before kissing you sweetly. “I’m so glad you’re a girl because you would be an absolute terror as a guy,” he states while shaking his head and cupping your cheeks.
“I think I should rush, baby,” you respond playfully, “you could be my big, dude! Come on, bro!”
“Enough of this!” Jaehyun jokingly hisses, “I want my sweet girl back.”
“Fine,” you drawl out with pout, “let this be your lesson though, Jae. When you go low, I can go lower. And I will go lower.”
“Trust me, I’ve learned. I’ll be better at texting, I’ll be an active listener, I’ll give you advice when you need it, and I’ll never ask you if you’re on your period again,” Jaehyun nods.
“See, you’re such a great learner. Let’s go get you a treat, baby,” you smile sweetly, pressing a kiss to his cheek before taking his hand and leading him down the stairs toward the kitchen.
“I don’t know how I feel about you talking to me like I’m a dog…”
You smile at him, “you like it.”
Jaehyun raises a brow, “do I?”
You hum, grabbing the ice cream from the freezer, “yup, you have a praise kink.”
Well, if you say so…
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absolutebl · 24 hours ago
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This Week in BL - It's Quiet but Sweet RN
Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.
I'm early I know, I have a v busy weekend.
Jan 2025 Week 2
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Ongoing Series - Thai
Your Sky (Sun iQIYI) ep 8 of 12 - So awkward and so cute! I love the sibling relationships in this show. They’re all so wonderful. 
Could we talk about Thomas in that aborted sex scene? That ultra sensual sniff test neck thing?
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He did a phenomenal job at conveying Japanese thirst with Taiwanese payback, unique IMHO for Thai BL. Kong did a pretty standard Thai style uke call and response, perhaps a bit more sexy than most. But Thomas was really spectacular. All in all, a particularly sensual make-out scene, rare in this kind of BL. I applaud the actors and director.
These two are so lovely.
OMG Lee has a phi he likes? Where did this nugget of joy come from?
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Hyung romance crumbs are a go! Just for me? How kind. Goodness Lee has got great game, watch that boy work. He certainly didn’t get it from his older brother. Also that was such a smooth approach, what a classy way to get permission to court. I don’t know why we got this inserted tiny short story, but I’m not mad about it. I hope we get more. But this is crumbs, can’t expect it. 
ThamePo (Fri YT) ep 5 of 12 - I love how Po understands Nano's feeling of heartbreak as just that, since to lose a friend (or friends) can be as painful as losing a lover. Po is such an empathic character, I love him so. 
The Heart Killers (Weds Gaga) ep 7 of 12 - I did bark with laughter at Style’s dad interrupting them. Also I enjoy the tension of knowing that there is doom in coming. It’s fun to watch these actors really stretch themselves to portray loving boyfriends with secrets. Bison looks like a determined little feral thing, Fadel just looks tired poor baby. 
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Caged Again (Fri Gaga) ep 10 end - Pet fish baby + cat = snack…… EPIC. Also giving a cat a career as a stuntman is genius. 
Final Thoughts
A sweet and innocent show with an absurd premise = sunshine penguin + grumpy panther become human boys and fall in love. With great leads and sides, a solid (if campy) support cast, and sweetly queer backbone, this still never entirely resonated with me because it was just a little too slow. Still I can totally understand why others loved it so much. 8/10 
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Fourever You (Thurs YT) ep 15 of 16 - I love that North has no artifice whatsoever. But frankly I’m really more interested in the 2 pairings still to come. If we are lucky. Arthit “getting bitten by piranhas” thing was hilarious. 
Sangmin Dinneaw (Sun iQIYI) ep 2 of 10 - Of course I love the argument over linguistics, this time honorifics. So good. But the rest of this ep was pretty slow. 
Perfect 10 Liners (Sun YT) ep 11 of 24 - Gun is a little dim, poor thing, but I do kinda adore him. Yotha is a bit of a melodramatic queen though I love how he deadpan responds to teasing and always acts exactly like a boyfriend. And I see GMMTV’s patented “single brain cell club” is back. 
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The Boy Next World (Sun IQIYI) ep 1 of 10 - Well it’s certainly intriguing. And I like this pair better here than in their first series. 
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Ossan‘s Love Thailand (Mon YouTube) ep 1 of 12 - Oof. Well, it’s better than the original, but that’s not saying much (from me). It’s slightly less overacted. I still find the lead utterly unappealing and I have no idea why anyone, including the audience, is supposed to be interested in him. But if he looks like Earth maybe it makes a little bit more sense? Mix is great. Honestly? This just made me wanna rewatch Thousand Stars.  
Ongoing Series - Not Thai
See Your Love (Taiwan Weds Gaga) ep 13 end - What a darling little show. I genuinely couldn’t have enjoyed it more. About a deaf care worker and his spoiled broken little prince. Taiwanese at its softest and best. Highly recommended. 
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Our Youth AKA Miseinen: Mijukuna Oretachi wa Bukiyo ni Shinkochu (Japan Tues Gaga) ep 10 end - The feeding each other water thing when the water-bottle trope is so prevalent in JBL = just so good. 
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Summation 
Adapted from a Korean Webtoon I can see why this went to Japan, it's super harsh for KBL Essentially a story about two lonely boys from opposite sides of the track who fall madly in love in high school, despite the fact that one is  repressed and the other abused. Despite a rough premise (trigger warnings) this is an oddly lovely little show. Darker than is my personal preference but sublimely stylish, turns out sometimes that combo works for me (see The 8th Sense). The world that springs to mind is “refined.” I enjoyed the restful distancing feel of the filming style.
This is an easy 9/10 from me. 
Eternal Butler (Taiwan Fri Gaga) ep 5 of 12 - I’m sorry but if you have a sex robot, he should be self lubing. Just saying. Also…… better at parking (pun not intended). I like the sides now. I’m enjoying this more than the first installment, easer power dynamic to digest. I do kinda adore the main couple and all their kinks. 
When it Rains it Pours (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - Convoluted story about a man in a relationship who is sexually unfulfilled and his friend who is in love with him, who accidentally become secret confidants.
Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 15 of ? - no time this week, two next week.
It's airing but......
Winter Is Not The Death of Summer (Thai ???) - has been picked up to air on WeTV, or something? Criminals who meet in prison fall in love. I did find it on YouTube, initially un-subbed, then subs happened by which time I got distracted. It is very pulp but intriguing. For now it's to the wayside until someone tells me it landed safely. Occasionally Thai pulps want to be edgy and it's not a good look on them. But sometimes they do good.
In Case You Missed it
End of year wraps are here!
2024 Trend Report
MY BEST & WORST BLs of 2024
Best Kisses (and sex scenes) of 2024
BL's 2024 Quirky Awards
2024 Awards - Quick Picks
Next Week Looks Like This:
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January Drops
1/15 Impression of Youth (Taiwan Weds Viki iQIYI) 9 eps - Same team as DNA Says Love You, so I have high hopes.
2025 Line Up
BL Announced for 2025 - PART 1
BL Announced for 2025 - PART 2
20 BLs Announced for 2025 That I'm Really Excited About
GMMTV 2025 Line Up - My Totally Biased and Wildly Flawed Feels
THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS
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It me. (Fourever You)
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Gayest bridge in Thailand is back!
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Love a good lap lie.
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I NEED MOAR!!! (all Your Sky)
(last week)
The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs
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karthara · 2 days ago
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Ok, first of all, uncharitable take here. Fuck you. Don't bully queer people you think are 'weird'. Calling a group weird and obsessive and suggesting that they were once harry potter fans at some point if they are like this is mean. You are implying a threat to cut them out of the queer community by phrasing it like that. Exclusionists suck, don't be one, queer people have enough enemies. Now that I have that out of my system.
While I hate that woman as much as the next queer person, why do you have an issue with using a cultural touchstone as a way to understand the self and connect with other people? Maybe I'm getting caught up on the 'for preteens' bit here. It feels a bit too much like all the people who think you should quietly exit fandom once you hit the 20-25 age range and settle down and pop out and raise babies for the rest of your life instead of having interests and hobbies. I understand a dislike of commercial properties and not wanting to be chained to someone who can be easily swayed by profit margins, but I feel part of being in fandom spaces is delving into the stories and world building and picking up bits you love and letting ideas that may be new to you expand your understanding of the world. To me it doesn't matter if the stories in question were written a long time ago and some 'smart educated' people decided they were worthy or if it's some fan fiction someone threw up on the internet on a drunken whim. If you find a story that evokes thought and feeling, isn't that a good thing? Maybe it's my mental health issues, but I don't see any problem with clinging to something that brings you joy if you're not hurting someone else. Maybe because I was bullied a lot as a child I'm overreacting here, but just… why do you feel the need to needle people you think are being 'weird'? I know we all feel like we're safe here under our rock on the tumblrs, but it's still a public forum. The things you say do reach other people. Honestly you sound like someone who just turned 18 and is desperately trying to prove how 'adult' you are by setting aside anything fun. Why do you feel the need to try and lift yourself up by putting other people down? Because that's what you are doing here. Good for you if you're 'too grown up' to get into 'children's stories', but please don't shit on those of us who find something to enjoy. If people want to find or make a flag that is specifically for their lived experience, is that harming anyone? No. Let people have fun with things.
do you think that a certain genre of queer person is so obsessively weird about pride flag discourse becuase their flags fill the gaping hole in their personality where a hogwarts house used to be
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thewertsearch · 2 days ago
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@necrowyrm asked: happy new year!!! enjoy the last little bit of homestuck before act 6! Anonymous asked: You have NO IDEA how much I was looking forward to your reaction to this flash :D @teddy-bearer-of-bad-news asked: a very late congratulations from me for making it this far! i gotta say, saving CASCADE for new year's is probably the smartest thing i've heard all week. may your experience be nothing short of righteous, comrade Anonymous asked: Cascade … Even years latter knowing it almost by heart, every once in a while I will take a little quarter of an hour to rewatch it, Say what you want about Hussie but there is a good reason Homestuck became so iconic. @adeptarcanist asked: The leadup to Cascade was honestly my favorite sequence in Homestuck, and maybe one of my favorites in any media ever? The way the narrative splits apart into all of the different scenes swirling in towards the critical moment, both advancing main plots and finding time to spend a moment of melancholy with characters who’d been left behind (The Jaspers and Nepeta scene :( )… it’s such a strong narrative device, and the tone it generates is impeccable. @calamitascalliope asked: I literally watched the flash again, and it still gives me chills every single time. Welcome to your post-Cascade life. You won't be able to think about anything the same ever again @iris-in-the-dark-world asked: "she looks so cool… but she’s so tragic… but she looks so cool…" has become a brainworm for me. i too love the handmaid's design btw, cascade time has been i think the most anticipated non-personal event of the entire year for me. i'm so excited @publicuniversalworstie asked: I want you to know that I also opened Cascade and started watching with you right after I saw your "oh my god it has chapters" ask, and I finished just as you posted "I will never be the same" !! And I bet lots of other people did too <3 so it's like we all watched it together!!!! Happy New Year and thank you for liveblogging!!!! It's been a pleasure!(and will continue to be) @krixwell asked: I would like you to know that your "Right, we're good to go!" and "oh my god it has chapters" posts were posted right as I was outside watching midnight fireworks ring in 2025 for the Central European timezone. Happy new year! @captorations asked:
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hey remember when rose just up and fucking said that. anyway congrats on reaching cascade! it absolutely wrecked me back in the day, i think i stared at those flaming curtains for a solid ten minutes as my brain permanently reconfigured. the first few notes of the track alone still give shivers. getting your reaction to cascade was a wonderful birthday present. (speaking of getting older: aradia 🤝 dulcinea also got that "distressingly short lifespan only to die early anyway" story thread going on. the parallels are paralleling.) anyway happy new year and congrats you are… slightly less than halfway done with homestuck. have fun!
Hey, guys. Cascade was so fucking good.
Like, there's really no competition; this is the best Flash page in the comic thus far. Peak music, peak animation, and absolutely a peak narrative. It tied up mountains of plot threads, providing complete answer to questions we're been asking for literally thousands of pages. It completed over a dozen arcs, both big and small. It made me gasp three times in fourteen minutes. It let Jade become a furry.
11/10, and I'm glad people had as much fun here as I did on New Year's Eve. Happy 2025, and happy Act 6!
@morganwick asked: Sally, predicting Cascade: "I have approximate knowledge of many things." @morganwick asked: "You literally have the whole world in the palm of your hands." -Sally to Jadesprite, December 16, 2024 (You might also want to reread post/770701212350857216 in light of recent developments.)
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Hah!
I mean, based on her powerset, it made sense that Jadesprite would do something like this eventually, but it's pretty funny that she did it more or less immediately.
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And in the end, CD really was a tricky little bastard. We'll definitely need to keep a closer eye on him, next time around.
Anonymous asked: Take a moment to consider that if anyone were to use the Homestuck website as it stands now instead of the Collection program, Cascade would have been presented in the YouTube player in Standard Definition, artifacted to hell, with a clear boundary showing the dimensions of the video from the very start. Preservation is so important.
Jeez, you're not kidding. The 1080p is fine, I guess, but it certainly doesn't hit like the Flash version does, especially with its lack of moving panels.
I know something had to change when Flash kicked the bucket, but surely there was a better way to preserve the video's soul.
Anonymous asked: to give you some of an idea of what homestuck fandom looked like during this time period, im cribbing from a very popular homestuck post: “first, this upd8 was something that we had been waiting for for WEEKS. A literally unprecedented wait period at the time. We were used to suckling at the teat of daily updates, a constant stream of conversation and plot twists and buildup, and as EOA5, we were finally going to figure out what all these countdowns and plot threads and disconnected elements were building up for. And when the progress bar reached 100%, and when the page FINALLY loaded on 10/25/11, it was chaos. This was 2011, a primetime peak point and growth period of Homestuck fan density.” (…) “MSPA crashed, as it had started to during the last few big [S] updates. Hussie had already bought new servers in advance, but even when allegedly thousands of dollars were spent it couldn't handle the accidental DDOS attack of Homestuck fans. People were up all night waiting for this upd8, the curiosity was killing me. I know at some point he was receiving at least 1 million unique visitors per day to his site [correction: according to Hussie’s tumblr, upwards of 2 million during this time], and even though Hussie had foreseen such traffic and thusly hosted [S] Cascade on Newgrounds, a dedicated video streaming site, Newgrounds was similarly unprepared for the sheer amount of people frantically mashing the play and refresh buttons, and also crashed. Immediately. MSPA and Newgrounds crashed definitively for at least two nights in a row” (…) “Andrew Hussie has gone on record to say this was one of the few times he thought Homestuck wasn’t worth it, because the sheer unbelievable cost (was it $10,000?) [correction: according to Hussie’s tumblr, it looked like it was going to cost $100,000 to keep [S] Cascade up for several days] of servers and the chaos of no one able to see the upd8 and crashing nearly every site after. He was tweeting during the whole debacle, stating he was reluctant to put it up on Youtube because of all the moving elements of the flash, and style, and how youtube degraded the quality of the file size, and how he tried to scratch out buffer time and pauses by putting periods of silence between each section of the 14 minute upd8, the longest upd8 yet” “So after Newgrounds patooted, he didn’t put it on youtube and instead put up the entire flash file on Megaupload, where it could be downloaded in it’s entirety to be watched. UNFORTUNATELY, Megaupload also crashed very quickly, which Hussie felt much headache over. But before that happened I managed to get the file, since I happened to be up very early that night! Next it was on dropbox, which didn’t crash but had “link unavailable” on and off. ”Spoilers were flying everywhere, people didn’t understand everything that had happened, and by the time the timeline of events in and out of [S] Cascade was all straightened out, people became even MORE hype. Like this whole thing lasted at least four days, and on top of that, the upd8 was good. Fandom exploded.” it is impossible to quantify the experience. The fact hussie was going to have to fork over A HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS to host it is crazy. I am never going to be over it.
Cascade's complete obliteration of the Flash-hosting internet says a lot about huge Homestuck truly was - but I think an even bigger indicator of the comic's success is the fact that Hussie dropped literally thousands of dollars on server upgrades to host the thing. That's not an investment you make unless you're expecting some serious returns.
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yuikomorii · 3 days ago
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AYAYUI IDOL AU: Chapter 2
// It’s time for the second chapter! This one focuses more on the conversations with other characters than on Ayayui interactions, but I’m really curious to see if anyone can guess who the second Diaboy to meet Yui will be. 👀
This story isn’t meant to be a harem or anything like that though, but all the Diaboys will meet Yui at some point. I hope you enjoy this chapter until the next one! 💖
Chapter 1
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Place: Dorms
Ayato: Good night.
Laito: Nighty night~!
— Ayato enters his room —
Laito: ( Hmm… he seems unusually quiet. He hasn’t said a single word the entire way, which is so unlike him. )
( It’s as if something’s weighing on his mind, that he’s deliberately keeping to himself. )
( Something must have surely happened to him when he went outside, but why won’t he say anything? That’s weird… )
— stretches and yawns —
Anyway, there’s no point in overthinking it. As long as it doesn’t damage his and our reputation, it’s not worth worrying about.
Place: Ayato’s room
Ayato: ( Phew, I managed to slip into my bed without waking Shu up. )
( The last thing I needed was a lecture about sneaking off to the club as an idol and nearly getting caught. )
( Haa… what a mess. I really made a fool of myself today, didn’t I? )
( If it weren’t for that girl, I’d probably be in the hospital right now, all over the news for alcohol poisoning. )
( Man, that would’ve totally wrecked my career… )
???: Heh, where have you been?
Ayato: …!
( Was that—)
O-Oi, you’re not sleeping!?
Shu: I was until a certain someone tripped over the WI-FI cable and woke me up.
Ayato: ( Fuck! )
Shu: But whatever, I answered your question, so now it’s your turn to answer mine.
— opens one eye and looks at him —
Ayato: ( Wait… I could just make something up and play it off as the truth! )
( Heh, exactly! There’s no way he’d be able to tell it’s a lie! )
Just practicing. I want to be the best version of myself for the next concert, y’know?
Shu: Hmm… I see.
And now, what’s the real answer?
Ayato: …!?
( How did he— )
Hah? W-What do you mean? I’m telling the truth!
— Shu opens both eyes and looks at him —
Shu: You went there, didn’t you?
Ayato: …!
( This guy… he can see through me! )
How the hell did you know that I went to the night club!?
Shu: Heh~? So I was right after all. You really did go there, huh?
Ayato: ( You… You fucking tricked me! )
Look, I know I’m not the best at keeping things together, but don’t tell Reiji! I beg you!
If the leader finds out, the staff will know, and once the CEO hears, I’m done! He’ll fire me in a heartbeat, no questions asked!
Shu: You’re overreacting. No idol is gonna get fired for just going to a night club.
Ayato: Man, you just don’t get it! It’s not just about going there— it’s what went down while I was there!
Shu: Oh? Now you’ve got me curious. What exactly happened?
— starts piping —
Ayato: ( Why do I keep getting myself in this!? )
( Haa… but I guess there’s no point in running away from my issues anymore. )
Basically, I was very tired and thought of over drinking to get my mind think of something else, but the alcohol and exhaustion made a really bad combination, so my chest started aching.
I went outside to get some air, but the pain just kept getting worse until this random chick found me and gave me her water bottle.
Shu: Wait… so you got caught?
Ayato: Luckily, no! As crazy as this sounds, she didn’t recognize me.
Heck, she even asked for my name after I called her a cab! But of course, I’m not that dumb. I knew it would have been way too risky to tell her my name.
( Honestly, I don’t even know why I was so anxious about it. In the end, everything worked out just fine, and I bet that girl will forget all about it in a few hours anyway. )
Shu: Hmm… you do realize that might have merely been an act, don’t you?
Ayato: Huh? What do you mean…?
Shu: Women are sly as foxes.
They’ll play all innocent and clueless, behaving like they have no idea what’s going on, but in reality, they’re just getting exactly what they want without anyone even realizing it.
Heh, it’s almost impressive how they pull it off.
Ayato: Wait… so you mean that girl knew who I was and only pretended not to so as to stalk me? But if that’s the case, then——
Shu: Haa… no need to scream, it’s almost 3 in the morning.
I’m not saying she’s a stalker, but you should probably be more cautious.
You know how fangirls are. If they see you talking to any girl that’s not them, they’ll lose it. Better to just watch out and avoid any unnecessary trouble.
— closes eyes again —
Not just for you, but for everyone else around too.
Ayato’s monologue
Shu’s right. I need to step up my game and start taking this job more seriously.
Being an idol isn’t just a paycheck; it’s a responsibility that goes far beyond me.
Every choice I make carries weight, and not just for my future, but for the company’s and everyone I work with.
Yeah… Exactly. If I let my career fall apart, it’s not only me who’ll feel it— the whole team, every project, and all the hard work we’ve put into this place will take a hit as well.
That’s why, from now on, I’m done making stupid decisions that could mess everything up. My focus is on my idol activities and nothing else.
I should have realized from the moment I signed the contract that living like a normal teenager just isn’t part of the deal anymore.
*Timeskip*
Place: Hotel kitchen
Yui: ( Working here is surprisingly relaxing. Not only that, but the co-workers I met seem very nice too! )
( I’m really excited to put my cooking skills to good use. From what I remember, this hotel has a great reputation, therefore it’s truly amazing to learn from such experienced professionals. )
???: Noooo!!!
Yui: …!?
( It’s coming from the storeroom! )
— quickly opens it —
???: ….!
Yui: Hana-san!
I-I heard you scream, are you alright?
Hana: Wa—… Was I really that loud? This is so embarrassing… I’m so sorry!
— covers face with hands —
Yui: Ah, there’s no need to worry about that, it’s fine.
More importantly, what happened? Did something scare you?
Hana: No, I’m not scared, more like… disappointed.
In case you haven’t heard already, the SAKAMAKIS are filming a special episode for their YouTube channel at three different locations, and guess what? My two favorite members are coming to this hotel in 4 days, but the issue is... it’s happening right when I’m not on shift…!
— starts crying —
On top of that, I promised my sister I’d visit her in Fukuoka, since we'll both be off work at the same time, which means that there’s absolutely no way I can meet them now!
This is such terrible timing…!
Yui: ( SAKAMAKIS… Based on Hana-san’s intense reaction, they must be some sort of important public figures, no? )
Oww… it does sound unfortunate, but you shouldn’t give up hope completely. After all, you live in Japan, so I’m sure there’s always a chance you’ll get to meet them!
Hana: It’s not as easy as you say…
They will return to Korea soon, and who knows when they’ll promote in Japan again? This was my only opportunity to see them outside of the concerts… and I couldn’t even manage to get any decent seats there.
— pouts —
Yui: ( Wait, did she say ‘concerts’? )
Ohh, I see. So they’re idols!
Hana: Eh? You… You actually don’t know the SAKAMAKIS—!?
Yui: W-Well… I’m sorry, the name doesn't really ring a bell, and to be honest, I can’t say I’m familiar with the idol world in general.
Hana: But come on, you must have at least seen their faces before, right?
— shows her a picture of them —
Yui: ( Will she be let down again if I say ‘no’? )
( Hmm… But truth be told, these boys are undeniably good-looking, and it’s clear that they must be hardworking as well, considering how they manage to juggle such hectic schedules. )
( I can easily see why they’ve captured the hearts of such passionate fans. )
— eyes suddenly widen —
( The red-haired one——! )
— blushes —
Hana: So, who did steal Yui-san’s heart~?
Yui: Ah, n-nobody…!
— gets embarrassed —
It’s just that the boy in middle… he got an incredibly well-featured face. I don’t know how to put it into words, but he simply appears unreal.
( To think that a human could look like this… it makes me a bit envious. His eyes and face shape are especially pretty. )
— Hana starts laughing —
Yui: ( Eh? Did I say something wrong? )
Hana: Get in line, that’s Ayato-san!
Hmph… just the thought of not being able to see his tiny, perfect face up close makes my heart ache.
Yui: ( Hana-san… she really seems to love this group a lot. )
( I can't help but think that if I were in her shoes, I'd feel hurt too not being able to see someone I admire so much… )
Hey, Hana-san… I know it’s not exactly the same as having it personally from him, but if it’s possible, I’d be more than willing to ask Ayato-san for an autograph on your behalf!
Hana: Eh—? Would you really do that for me!?
Yui-san, you are the best!
— hugs her —
Yui: I-It’s nothing, really.
Hana: Wait a little—! Now that I think about it, you could also totally grab a photo with them! Isn’t that wonderful?
( I can’t believe it! This way I’ll be just one person away from Ayato-san! )
Yui: Uuh… I’m sure it’d be a nice memory to look back on, but wouldn’t it bother you if I did? After all, you’ve been their loyal fan all this time, not me.
Besides, there’s no guarantee that they would agree to take a picture with an ordinary person such as myself.
Hana: That doesn’t matter, silly! They’re super chill with their fans, and everyone says they never turn down a picture request— unless they’re busy, of course. There’s no way they’d refuse you, especially not in a setting like this.
You also mentioned being captivated by Ayato-san’s visuals, so fan or not, I think anyone would jump at the chance to take a picture with such a fine man~!
Yui’s monologue
Hana-san and I continued to talk about it for a while, and during our conversation, she suggested a few of their songs for me to listen to on my way back to the Airbnb.
At first, I wasn’t sure what to expect, but as I played each one, I was pleasantly surprised.
While I’m still not very knowledgeable about this group, the melodies, the lyrics, and even the energy in their performances were captivating in a way I hadn’t expected.
That Ayato boy… he seems like someone who was born to be on stage. Such charisma and beauty… It really makes me wonder how he acts off-cameras.
Hana-san has clearly supported the SAKAMAKIS for such a long time, and to finally get the chance to meet them, only to have it slip through her fingers, must be heartbreaking.
A part of me can’t shake the feeling of guilt, even though I know very well that it wasn’t my or anyone’s fault.
It might not be a fair comparison, I know, but it reminded me of the boy I met yesterday.
He has probably forgotten about me already, but just like Hana-san dreams of meeting her idols, I find myself wishing to meet him again.
Author’s note:
* In case you're wondering why Ayato is sharing a room with Shu and not Laito, many companies assign roommates to idols randomly. The idea is that idols are supposed to get along with everyone, so the arrangement is made to promote harmony and teamwork, regardless of personal preferences.
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the-kingshound · 2 days ago
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I loved the update just because it exists. I loved the bit with the mounts (especially Arthur's trying to ground MC) but my tiny bit of concrit is the "I know you're a mage" convo feels...shoehorned? Like we get the panic attack and Arthur just says he doesn't think the same way as Uther and it's just...It feels (imo) that the Hound once more just accepts Arthur at face value again? I loved the rewrite making the Hound more wary of Arthur, and this kinda felt like a slip? Idk it just feels like there could be...more there. Or perhaps Arthur will try to revisit the topic? Cause like idk about you but if I was just told "I don't want to do anything to you buuuuuut people in my court might," I'd feel threatened and like...I wouldn't believe a single word prior to the "my court might" part. Cause like the Hound is a political prisoner, the nobles (Our sister in law is amazing) made that clear, so it's just another chain Arthur is adding, a little "Be careful love, you don't know what SOMEONE might do if they found out you're a mage :) :)", you know?
And as someone who played as a Hound who is absolutely dreading this marriage (they literally feel like a prisoner) that whole thing kinda felt as if that wasn't an option? Like for example, the walking into the church thingy you have: I feel better, I'm not alone, and the "I am strong and proud" options, but no real option for...just numb? I personally just headcanoned the Hound was disassociated to the point they won't remember the day at all. (I kinda hope we might just get to breakdown with our brothers, or idk alone in the dark)
Also I forget, but is this a game where we have to rack up romance points to lock in? Or one we choose the route? Because I honestly didn't feel that my Hound would want to talk to anyone during what is (to them) a celebration of their collaring/house's defeat.
BUUUUT I truly do hope you take this as constructive. You won't please all of us, and you shouldn't try to. I love that you gave us even this and you are incredibly strong and lovely for pushing through everything. If I am out of line, feel free to ignore or tell me off and I'll just smash my Hound into a better mold for the story lol. After all, it is your story, tell it how you want.
I would really like to give you a long response to your very helpful feedback, but I fear I am lacking the energy to do so. I just want you to know that I hear you, and in truth you make really good points.
1) yeah I do admit I was getting close to burnout with writing in this update, and that scene in particular might have suffered for it. I'll revise it, and hopefully try to not make the interaction feel so jarring. (Note: did you try to pick the more... aggressive option? It goes in a different way, maybe it is less weird?)
2) you are totally right on the options for the marriage - especially because you can play a very numb MC. I'll either edit or add that option. Ohh and the breakdown with the siblings is peak idea. I'm writing that down.
3) as for the romance points: this game is focused strongly on MC. You can choose the pace of the relationship your Hound develops, and for romance, you need to first have some platonic points with said RO. Platonic means in this case that MC wants to spend time with them, and doesn't have to go further than what will become a lifelong friendship.
You do have to pick at least an option to have platonic points with a RO, but you won't get locked out of anything in this game. Every choice shapes your personal Hound's story, this is not a game that punishes you, or that is focused solely on romance.
Thank you for sending this in! This kind of feedback, especially if worded clearly and kindly lik you did, can be so helpful and I love getting it even if it makes me pause and rethink some things.
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hueseok · 12 hours ago
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hello, @tatzzz-25 ! i’ll be replying to your comment through this long post which will also be directed to anyone who's curious about this unfinished draft’s ending hehehe
okay so i wasn’t really planning to answer this because like i said, this draft will be forever unfinished and y’all are going to be left hanging with me (hehe) — but i actually do have an idea with how this fic is supposed to go from where i left it, it’s just that it really is over the place.
it was supposed to be something like this (i’m going to say sorry in advance if what you’re about to read is jumbled because like i said THAT IS WHY I WAS UNABLE TO FINISH THIS VERSION OF IT WAS ALWAYS YOU LMAO):
ben does come to the city where jk and oc is. he meets jk and from the get-go, it’s obvious that ben and oc are like… complete opposites. i’m not sure if i’ve mentioned it explicitly on the unfinished fic but jk and oc are both like adrenaline junkies so seeing oc with ben who is very timid and passive sets jk off because it’s like “what the hell did she see in this guy???”
anyways, jk tries to piss / annoy oc more by suggesting that they all spend quality time together as a way for him to know ben. he specifically suggests that they go to this rock climbing place nearby because oc loves rock climbing and it’s her favorite hobby. the three of them do end up going and this whole sequence is just basically jk being “we’re a better match than you and ben because we love rock climbing” or still being like “what the FUCK does she see in this guy?????” because ben is the cliché good guy who’s too nice and all that (but!! there is a moment wherein ben does show that he’s being kinda mad too at jk’s behavior bc jk really be showing how much he knows oc and it’s obvious that he still likes her)
after those two scenes… i honestly didn’t have any solid ideas anymore aside from jk eventually thinking that maybe a guy like ben is what oc needs the more he sees them together (like oc needs someone more stable or more mature etc.). this prompts him to be kinda less stubborn about the whole divorce thing yet still kinda bitter at the same time. ben, on the other hand, sees the genuine connection between jk and oc, which makes him question oc one time if she’s sure that there isn’t any left feelings for her supposed to be ex-husband but oc always denies it and blah blah blah
as we get closer to the conclusion of the story, these are the scenes that i have originally thought about:
jk tells oc that he’ll sign the divorce papers after he graduates from the fighter weapons school
oc is relieved but has mixed feelings about it
jk graduates and oc attends the after party something of the graduation with ben. there jk hands her the signed divorce papers, also telling her that he’s getting deployed tomorrow for an emergency situation so that night might be the last night they’ll see each other (this scene makes it clear that jk’s mission will be dangerous so oc will get worried)
oc and ben will return to their shared hotel room. oc will not be able to sleep because of worrying about jk and she’ll have a realization that she really can’t afford to lose him. 
she talks to ben about it who already foresaw this situation, but instead of being mad or what, he encourages her to “follow her heart”
ANYWAYS, oc goes to jk to confront him. they have a huge confrontational scene wherein they admit they still love each other—they do the deed, reconcile, and ending scene is jk tearing the divorce papers????
yup. that’s basically it AHAHAHAHAHA
also, a little bonus. i also had a draft for a “no ben version” wherein no other love interest is involved and it’s literally the same ending but supposed to have some kind of epilogue at the end but evidently, past athena no longer had the time to even finish outlining sksks:
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it was always you (from the vault)
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originally titled: take my breath away.
a.k.a. the original draft for my “it was always you” fic wherein naval aviator!jungkook is your cocky soon-to-be-ex-husband who won’t sign your divorce papers because he’s still in love with you lol.
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pairing: jungkook x reader
word count: 4.5k
content: fluff, semi-angst, exes to ??? | ft. naval aviator!jungkook + husband!jungkook
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warning: what you’re about to read (if you do choose to read this) is an unfinished work which perhaps will forever be unfinished.
the only reason i’m posting it because i feel like it’d be a waste to let it rot in my drafts considering that i really liked how it went until the moment i stopped writing hehehehe. i’ve also thought about continuing this story but since i already have an existing naval aviator!jungkook in my masterlist, i felt like it’d be redundant to post this!
anyhow, since a lot of you showed so much love to “it was always you”, i thought it’d be nice to share this 🥹
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You really hoped that flying for almost three hours and experiencing horrid turbulence during half of the trip was going to be worth it. But again, that was only the first part of the whole charade; the real challenge would begin perhaps much later, when you finally come face to face with the person that you were scheduled to meet.
As you walked inside the bar, the nerves that previously weren’t there started to crawl from your chest to your legs, making it harder to reach the counter where a vacant bar stool stood. You didn’t even know why you were suddenly nervous—although you could only guess that the sudden burst of anxiety was rooted from talking again to the most stubborn man ever to walk on earth—and you were already preparing yourself for the long conversation you were going to have with him and possibly the extended leave you’ll have to inform your boss for this trip because of his infamous stubbornness.
“____?” a familiar voice abruptly called out for you after you finished ordering a mug of beer from the barmaid, “no fucking way. It can’t be.”
You turned to your left and saw Jung Hoseok.
Spoiler: he wasn’t the person you were going to meet today, which made seeing him such a delight. You grinned immediately upon making eye contact, hopping out of your chair and exclaiming his name with the same enthusiasm he let out when he did realize it was you who he was looking at.
“Holy shit. What are you doing here?” He automatically engulfed you in a tight embrace when you initiated. You noticed that he was wearing an off duty attire, a plain black polo shirt and blue jeans, his hair kept neat and short. “Actually, scratch that—there’s only one person you should be here for.”
You bothered to smile. “Yeah. I’m guessing he didn’t tell anyone I’m visiting, huh?”
“Nope. He 100% kept it a secret because he knows that we’re going to steal you away if he spills.”
“We?” you mused. You didn’t even know that he was training with Hoseok, and now you’re discovering that Hoseok’s apparently not the only friend he has here. “How many of you that I know are training with him?”
Hoseok takes a short pause to think about it. “Hm… well, there’s me, then Yoongi and… Namjoon. That’s just about it.”
“Wow. It’s essentially the whole group again, huh?”
“Yup. I mean, we are the best of the best.” He smirked.
You playfully rolled your eyes.
“And we’ve missed you,” he added swiftly. “I’m a bit mad that your husband didn’t inform us that you’d be here—but again, I’m not surprised.”
“Sorry. I think I have myself to blame for that. I did tell him that I don’t intend to stay here for too long.”
“Why not?”
“I’m just here to make sure he signs the divorce papers.”
Hoseok nodded, thoughtful and a bit disappointed. “Is he giving you a hard time with them?”
“You can say that.” A dramatic sigh escaped you. “He insisted that if I really wanted to get his signature, I should just go here where he’s training.”
“Classic Jungkook.” He laughed, and you agreed with a snort.
He was right, this was all a Classic Jungkook move. 
Sometimes, you didn’t understand why you agreed to marry Jungkook so urgently when he asked for your hand, even after knowing that he did everything he could to ensure that he got what he wanted in the end.
Though that was just that thing, wasn’t it? He knew exactly what to do in order to get what he wanted—and at that time of his proposal, you knew it was you that he sought for.
Despite the fact that Jungkook had only been seeing you for less than a year, he was convinced that you were the love of his life. It was the reason why when he needed to be deployed for a mission, it seemed proposing was the most natural thing to do, going on about how he wanted to be reassured that when he came back for you, you were going to be there waiting for him, not only as a girlfriend, but as his wife.
And you said yes, without missing a beat, because you genuinely loved Jungkook and for you, the both of you were a match made in heaven.
By the two year mark of being a wedded couple though, just being in love with each other wasn’t enough. There were a lot of arguments, irreconcilable differences, a lot of moments wherein you wanted to abandon everything and just disappear—until you finally declared that enough was enough and you were going to file for divorce.
Of course, Jungkook didn’t want to sign them, but he did grant you a little bit of your freedom back. He did so by leaving your shared apartment on a random Thursday, only sending a text that said he was being called by the Navy for a mission he couldn’t disclose per usual, and that if you really wanted to divorce him, you’d just have to wait for him to go back.
He never returned though. Because after that mission, came a next one, and another one, until you heard that he was invited to a naval fighter weapons school in the northern part of the country, close to the seas and where he’ll be training for a few weeks among the best naval aviators in the nation. 
That’s when he decided to invite you over and say that if you wanted his signature, you’d have to be the one who’ll go to him. You initially contemplated for a long time before just going forth with his ridiculous demand. Nonetheless, you figured you were once again left with no choice because here you were now, doing exactly what he wanted to get what you exactly wanted as well.
God, who knew that contrary to how easy it was to enter this marriage, it was an absolute pain to get out of it?
“Do you know where he might be?” you asked Hoseok while taking a sip of your beer. “Or if he’s going here at least?”
“I have no clue,” Hoseok said. “Though I do know that he should have free time. We don’t have training for the rest of the day.”
“I’ll be seriously pissed if he stands me up.”
“He won’t.”
“It’s Jungkook.”
“Yeah, but you’re ____,” he said it like it was reason enough, “and Jungkook can’t resist seeing you. Especially if it’s been what? How many months have passed since you two saw each other?”
You held up six fingers, continuing to gulp down your drink in frustration. “Still, he loves to annoy the shit out of me.”
“It’s his love language.”
“Oh, I’ve been made very aware.”
Hoseok barked out a laugh. He was a huge fan of your dynamic with Jungkook; he was practically there throughout the whole journey of your relationship. As Jungkook’s weapon systems officer, the both of them were thick as thieves, which also made him the best man of the wedding—so deep inside, he wanted to believe that whatever it was that you and Jungkook were dealing with, it would be resolved soon enough.
“Well, it looks like you don’t have to wait for too long.” Hoseok toasted his glass to the direction of the entrance where the Jeon Jungkook entered, removing his aviator sunglasses and hooking it on the collar of his white shirt, worn inside a dark blue long-sleeved polo he was sporting as well.
You followed his line of vision and scowled at the sight of Jungkook. Not because you hated your husband, but because even when in the middle of finalizing a divorce, you couldn’t deny that he was too handsome for his own good.
“I think this is my cue to leave,” Hoseok added, getting off his seat. “It was nice seeing you again, ___. Let’s catch up later, yeah? I’ll conspire with Joon and Yoongi to steal you away.” He smiled mischievously and gave you a sweet chaste kiss on the cheek before walking over to Jungkook, greeting him, pointing to where you were, and then walking to another table where you guessed a bunch of other naval aviators were hanging out.
A sigh escaped you, just in time when Jungkook met your gaze.
He grinned—actually grinned—and you had to prevent your eyes from twitching to not look like some crazy person who didn’t have any self-control. So, instead of plastering the same scowl a few seconds ago for him to see, you flashed a sarcastic smile, waving your hand.
“There’s my beautiful wife,” Jungkook claimed when he was close enough, marching towards you, appearing like he was going to go for a kiss but before he could, you outstretched an arm and stopped him by literally wrapping your fingers around his neck as if you were planning to choke him to death with the gesture (which you were tempted to do).
He rolled his eyes, holding your wrist and bringing it down.
“Can’t I give you a kiss?” he retorted.
“No.”
“And Hoseok can?”
“Hoseok’s my friend.”
“I’m your husband.”
“Ex-husband.”
“Wrong. I haven’t signed any divorce papers, honey, so in the eyes of the law, I’m still very much your husband.” He quickly stole a kiss on the corner of your mouth and you allowed yourself to grimace in annoyance, glaring at him as he took Hoseok’s previous seat.
You watched him order a drink for himself and nachos for sharing. You didn’t say anything while he did all that; you just stared at him, analyzing him, trying to decipher what was going on in that head of his. You honestly had no clue what his thought process was in depriving you of the signature you wanted and then randomly agreeing to meet you again, accompanied with the condition that you’re the one who has to go to him and not the other way around.
As he reasoned, he was still in the middle of training, and he couldn’t just leave even if he wanted to and that’s why you had to make the effort to make this work (he made it clear that he didn’t want to make the effort anyway if it meant it could lead to his and yours divorce).
“How are you?” he asked once he was done ordering and you scoffed.
“Let’s not do that, Jungkook.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Don’t tell me that I’m not allowed to know how you’re doing too.”
“I meant the small talk. Let’s just cut to the chase.”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
“Jungkook.”
“Alright.” He placed an arm against the counter, spinning his stool to face you. “You already know where I stand, though. I still haven’t changed my mind in wanting to work it out first.”
“What? But you told me that if I went here—”
“I would talk to you, not sign the papers,” he finished. “You didn’t really think I’d sign them just like that, right?”
Your stomach dropped.
There goes assuming that the three-hour flight to go here would be worth it.
“I did, actually.” You grumbled. “When are you giving this a rest?”
He seemed annoyed by the rhetoric question. “When are you going to stop thinking that divorce is the answer to our problem?”
“We already did couple’s therapy and that proved to be a waste of time.”
“That’s because you were stubborn and wouldn’t cooperate.”
“Oh, I’m the one who’s stubborn between the both of us? I’m the one who wouldn’t cooperate?”
“Yes.”
“No, I’m not!” You raised your hands up. “You were the one who always said some lame excuse to not attend it with me.”
“Babe, how many times do I have to tell you, my schedule isn’t—”
“Yeah, whatever.” You didn’t let him finish, knowing that he was going to say something about how being in the Navy didn’t grant him the free time you were expecting him to have.
“I’m just saying… you can’t keep on doing this, you know?” you said.
“Can’t keep doing what?”
“Prolonging this. We already broke up, Jungkook. There’s not point in staying married.”
“That’s the thing, though.” He smirked. “I can keep prolonging it.”
Your nostrils flared. “Why?”
“Because I can.”
You think flashes of red were beginning to blur your vision.
Jungkook noticed the rage building up, yet he didn’t back down. “Why are you even so eager to legally separate? Do you plan on getting married again soon?” he asked.
It was supposed to be a joke, because Jungkook didn’t actually think you were seeing anyone at the moment—but at the mention of it, he saw the manner in which your expression slightly shifted, and he narrowed his eyes at you, understanding. “Don’t bullshit me. You aren’t seeing anyone, right?”
You blinked, acting all innocent. “It’s none of your business.”
“It is. You’re still married to me.”
“We’ve broken up for almost a year now, Jungkook.” You groaned, remaining him once again. “If you just signed the goddamn papers, all of this would be out of your hands.”
He scoffed. “You are seeing someone?”
“That is not the point of our conversation.”
“Well, it’s a significant aspect of it.”
“Fine.” You huffed. “I am seeing someone. Happy?”
Jungkook was in fact not happy. He was angry, but then he thought of how he shouldn’t be, because you and him have broken up for almost a year now like you said. Even though he wasn’t in support of that notion, he remembered at least granting you enough freedom to feel like you could date around without thinking about how you were technically cheating on him if ever you did. 
However, he didn’t really think you would find someone. Sure, you were beautiful, you had an amazing personality, there was no question when it came to you attracting men, yet you could be picky most of the time. It was even a miracle how he managed to bag you; though he guessed that he didn’t really have to try that hard in the first place before because the two of you just had so much in common for you to ignore.
“What’s his name?” he asked after a long silence.
You crossed your arms. “Do you have to know?”
“Yes.”
“Fine.” You adjusted yourself in your seat. “It’s Ben.”
Jungkook thought the name sounded stupid. “How long have you been dating him?”
You hesitated, already predicting how he was going to react that you almost exaggerated the answer, but decided against it last minute. “Five weeks.”
He suddenly burst out laughing, the sound echoing inside the bar; it was the exact type of response you were positive he was going to do, proof that you knew him too well and that you shouldn’t have changed your pretense in the first place.
“It’s not funny,” you hissed, noticing that a lot of people were glancing at where you were both situated. “What the hell is funny about what I said?”
“You want to divorce me for a guy you’ve been dating for five weeks?” He carried on snickering; he barely got the whole sentence out because he was too busy catching his breath.
“Of course not! I would just prefer it if I don’t have any baggage left before attempting to commit to another relationship.”
The barmaid came back with Jungkook’s beer and nachos. He thanked her and slid the basket of cheesy nachos to your direction, an offer that you could get a piece if you wanted. However you were neither hungry nor interested in getting anything from him that would elicit a thank you from you, too prideful at this point due to how annoying he was being.
“What does he do for a living?” he asked next.
“I’m not telling you.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re going to make fun of it.”
“Is it worth making fun of?”
“No.”
“Then just tell me.” He threw a chip inside his mouth. 
You pressed your lips together. “He’s a bank clerk.”
Jungkook didn’t laugh this time, but the corners of his mouth were twitching as he grinned, and you found yourself refraining from wanting to strangle him again, questioning why you thought it was a good idea to come here since it was obvious that talking to him properly was an impossible task.
“You’re dating a bank clerk?” he posed the question like it was the most preposterous thing he had heard from you today. “What the hell do the both of you have in common?”
“It doesn’t matter. I’ll have you know that Ben is a very nice guy.”
“That’s what ladies say when a man is horrible in bed.”
“That’s not true.”
“Is he good then?”
“That’s none of your business, Jungkook,” you uttered once more, teeth gritting. “Besides, it’s only been five weeks.”
He smirked. “That’s a no then. It seems that you haven’t slept with him,” he said. “Makes sense. I mean, if you have already slept with another guy, you might be already begging me to get back together. Given that I’m the best sex you’ve ever had.”
You stared at him in disbelief. “How the fuck are you always so arrogant?”
“It comes with the praise I usually get during my escapades, babe.” Jungkook winked at you, hand reaching out for another nacho.
“Oh, so I’m assuming you do have sex with other people now. You know, if you’ve just divorced me, you can go live your happy single life again to go to that without any worries.”
“I don’t sleep with other people—”
“But you just said—”
“I meant before I met you.” He pointed out, giving you a look. “Why are you even thinking about that? Are you jealous?”
“God, you’re fucking impossible.” You practically growled. 
He flashed you another smirk, amused.
“Anyhow,” you began, bringing out the divorce papers from your bag that you should have given him the second you saw him, but as what you think was part of his plan, he did manage to stall you in doing so, “here’s the papers.” You shoved it to his chest, rendering Jungkook no choice but to grab it.
He glanced down at them. “You’re never going to stop until I sign these, huh?”
You nodded. “Never.”
“Fine.” Jungkook flickered his gaze on you. “I’ll sign them.”
You glared at him. “Be serious.”
“I am serious.”
“Are you?”
You were still suspicious, but at the same time, you had high hopes.
“Yes. But I need to meet Ben the bank clerk first.”
Your spirits dropped. “Oh, no, no, no,” you made a huge cross sign with your arms, “you are not giving me another condition just to go against your word in the end.”
“I won’t this time.”
“Yeah, right.” You scoffed loudly.
It was his turn to narrow his eyes at you. “I’m serious. You want my signature or not?”
You bit the insides of your cheeks, gazing at him.
You were no fool, you knew why he wanted to meet him; you knew that it was because he wanted to see it for himself if the guy you replaced him for was actually more good looking than him or at least appeared as if he could survive a fistfight if Jungkook prompted to start one. It was all testosterone and ego, and you contemplated cutting his balls just to get this over with once and for all.
Surely, by then, he would be more agreeable.
“Fine,” you told him. “If you meet him, you’ll sign the papers? Promise?”
He took a sip of his beer, shrugging. “Sure.”
***
Jungkook watched the scene unfold in front of him with an amused expression.
Although he did admit it once that he did get a bit jealous whenever you gave the other guys more attention than him, he loved his best pals too much to care.
It was why he allowed instances like this to happen wherein you made it apparent that you valued their company much more than you did Jungkook. It was evident in the manner in which you laughed loudly as Hoseok, Yoongi, and Namjoon hugged you, each one of them taking turns in lifting your body off the ground a few seconds in glee.
You were seen as a beloved sister to them as they saw Jungkook as a cherished brother in the Navy.
“Alright, that’s enough,” Jungkook reckoned after five seconds.
Namjoon glanced at him, the last one to embrace you. “Jealous?” he teased, reading his mind.
“I am, actually.” Jungkook affirmed. “You three got a better greeting than I did.”
You rolled your eyes at the pettiness of his comment. “That’s because there’s nothing good about seeing you again, Jungkook.”
Jungkook glanced at you. “You wound me, babe.” He placed a dramatic hand on his chest. “Truly, you do.”
The guys stifled a laugh.
Today’s agenda was supposed to be a catch up session with the three guys. News spread quickly yesterday that you were in town thanks to Hoseok, and given that the three of them were good friends of yours, you didn’t decline the offer when Jungkook informed you that they wanted to meet you while you were here.
So, as the next day came in and the evening rolled, they met up with you at the same resto-bar Hoseok found you in. It did seem like the only venue that was both near enough from the academy and the hotel you were staying at that offered adequate food. You observed that the occupants of the place were composed primarily of people wearing naval aviator uniforms or motorcyclists stopping by before going forth with their ride.
“So,” Yoongi began just as Jungkook headed to the counter, volunteering to relay all of your orders to the barmaid, “we heard from a little birdie that you’re seeing someone else.”
You gave him a look. “Still a big gossip, I see.”
“Oh, it’s not counted as gossip if it’s what Jungkook’s been complaining about the whole time at the showers,” Namjoon humored.
Hoseok agreed with a nod. “It’s what he’s been nonstop yapping about earlier when we were flying,” he said. “Seriously, ____. Release the boy from misery and just get back together.”
They watched you grimace. “You all know my relationship with Jungkook has been long complicated for it to be as easy as that.”
“Did he cheat on you?” Namjoon asked.
“No, of course not.” You scoffed. “He’s an annoying shit for the most part but he’s not a cheater.”
He physically relaxed at the confirmation. “Good, because I don’t think I can beat him in a fistfight.”
Yoongi chuckled. “What’s the matter then? You still haven’t spared us any details on why you’re so keen to divorce him.”
“There’s no particular reason,” you sighed with a throw of your hand. “It’s just a compilation of the small things. He’s away most of the time, I’m away most of the time when he’s available—we fight a lot, argue a lot, it just doesn’t seem to be worth fighting for anymore.”
“So, you don’t love him anymore?”
“I…” you trailed, abruptly feeling like you were being interrogated, “I mean, love doesn’t go away easily. And it hasn’t been that long since we called it quits.”
The three men shared a look among themselves.
You straighten your posture. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“What does?” Hoseok queried.
“That look you guys just gave each other. I don’t like it.”
“That’s just their faces, babe,” Jungkook reappeared, taking the liberty to take the seat on your right. “What are you fellas talking about?” he asked his buddies.
They didn’t dare utter a word. You were under the impression that they had an understanding between them that talking about your relationship right in Jungkook’s face was something one should not ought to do.
You, on the other hand, took it as your cue to speak, starting another topic to hopefully erase the previous one. “Ben said he can come. He’s boarding tonight,” you told Jungkook as he’s sipping from his glass of service water.
“That’s good.” He didn’t look as interested as he was yesterday.
“Who’s Ben?” It was Hoseok again.
“The bank clerk,” Jungkook answered.
“The new guy you’re seeing?” Yoongi asked you.
“Yep,” you said before turning to Jungkook. “And can you please refer to him by his name? He’s not just a bank clerk.”
“Is he a boring bank clerk?” Jungkook asked, that teasing smirk flashing on his mouth.
“Will he be here tomorrow?” Namjoon chimed in.
You nodded. “Hopefully.”
“Great,” Jungkook placed his glass down on the table. “It’ll be enough time to get to know him.”
He said ‘enough time’ like his time was limited because it really was. He informed you before you parted ways yesterday that he was graduating from the academy this Friday, and that after that, he was almost 100% sure he was going to be deployed again with some of his classmates for a mission that you wouldn’t be allowed to know the details of. 
Your stomach somersaulted when he told you that.
Somehow, despite convincing yourself that you no longer cared for Jungkook, the thought of his life being put at risk again once he was back on the field made you want to vomit in anxiety. It reminded you that his very dangerous occupation was one of the root causes of your separation, for there were months wherein you couldn’t take the fear of waiting in uncertainty on whether he was going to come home to you or not, regardless of how he promised he would every single time.
It was funny, you thought. One of your similarities with your husband was that the both of you were adrenaline junkies. You and him bonded over extreme rides in amusement parks, activities that got your heart pumping and gave you the sensation of being on top of the world—and yet it was the reason why you didn’t want to be with him anymore as well, too scared to continue loving him if he always sought for adventure and danger through being a naval aviator.
“You knew what you were signing up for, ____,” he told you during one of your many arguments. “You entered this relationship knowing the nature of my job. You can’t expect to adjust for you when it comes to—”
“I’m not expecting you to adjust for me, Kook,” you replied in exasperation, practically begging him to listen to you with an open mind at that point. “God, I just want you to consider me. I just want to feel that for once, you actually remember that someone’s always waiting for you to come home.”
Whenever conversations like that popped back inside your memory, you forced yourself to push it away. It wasn’t an experience you wanted to relive. You’ve spent far too many nights just crying because of how it felt like to be in a constant state of worry for the person you found yourself loving the most.
“We can all meet him, right?” asked Hoseok, looking at the other guys for back up. 
You surveyed them, raising your eyebrows before saying your answer.
“Like the hell you would.”
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pyramid-of-starrs · 2 days ago
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Saturn pt 1
“Life’s better on Saturn, got to break this pattern” -SZA
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Pairing: Ex Situationship San x Black reader (reader has locs as well :3)x Maddox
Submission from: @reosbabygurl
Summary: You and San were in a long term situationship that ultimately led nowhere. Time goes by and you're in a new relationship, but how will San take that?
Word Count: 4.2Kish?
Warning: Cheating, toxic behavior, manipulation, gas lighting, rude/mean behavior, clingy, possessive, cursing, arguing, bad relationship, pregnancy mentioned
Smut warning: This chapter  there will be a small smut scene with Maddox, kissing, boob play Eventual - Breeding, kissing, pussy drunk, body worship, needy boy San, Dom San, a bit subby San, dry humping, some anal (Just fingers), phone sex, masturbation,
A/N: I had to tweak it a bit and I don't mention the reader being black with locs until a bit deeper into the story. This story has such a good plot and dialog imo so please give me lots of feedback.
Also, this is not at ALL what I think Maddox acts like T-T, I actually love and adore that man so much but wanted to switch it up with who I added into the story. This is not a representation of how anyone acts, just fun :3
Minors dni
All you ever craved was love, you just wanted to be loved properly, thoroughly, genuinely. Nothing more, nothing less. You spent a good chunk of your 20s in a situationship that ultimately led nowhere. You and San were a perfect example of “right person, wrong time”. You both wanted more from the relationship but in the end you both could never find the right time to commit. It started with you wanting to date him first but he “wanted to get to know each other more” then when he was ready you needed to focus on school. There were times when you both were ready, you both wanted to ask, but the fear of rejection held heavy on both your hearts so ultimately you both decided to fuck your feelings away. Spending endless time with each other, going on dates, kissing, hugging, having sex like any couple would. Just no real title.
But now, you were 24, he was 25 and you wanted more. You wanted to openly and happily be someone’s girlfriend. San had just started his small business, a local toy shop, something you found adorable and admirable. He had finally turned his hobby of collecting plushies and other trinkets into a business, you were proud, but still hurt when he told you he didn’t have time for a relationship at that point. You tried to understand, you wanted to convince yourself that you could wait but realistically, you couldn’t.
His friends threw him a celebratory party, that’s where you met his friend's friend, Maddox. A sweet long haired man, he was 2 years older than San and honestly didn’t even know him. He only came because his friends wanted him out of the house. You spent hours of the party just talking, you could admit, finding a replacement at your situationships probably wasn’t the best idea, but it’s not like you were doing it on purpose. San noticed, how couldn’t he. Even with the many other people begging for his attention, his eyes were fixated on you and the man that got your attention. He had enough of watching and waiting for you to be done and stormed over to you and asked for you to speak to him privately.
You argued. You argued loud enough for the party to start to hear. At that point Wooyoung thought it would be best to end it on Sans behalf. After some hours you broke things off with San, screaming that you never wanted to see him again and that you were done. And you were, you were fed up.
It took time to get over San, it was hard but Maddox really made it better. So now here you are, 2 years later, and you got what you wanted. You got someone who would be serious about you. Maddox was so serious about you that after the first year he proposed. You were not only someone’s girlfriend but now someone’s fiancé.
You stood over the stove in your shared apartment, you were cooking dinner for you and your fiancé. A firm ringed hand snaked its way around your waist.
“Mmm, it smells so good baby.” Maddox said as he planted a kiss on your cheek, his curly bang pieces tickling your face as you giggled.
“You’re actually home, I had to go all out for dinner!” You said with a big smile on your face. Maddox spent a large portion of his time working, he was a producer at an up and coming music company. You loved his passion but hated that that meant less time together, but you stayed understanding.
Maddox nervously released your waist, a weak smile painted on his face. You looked out of the corner of your eye and noticed his strange expression.
“What is it?”
“Well… about that…”
Your expression of comforted happiness immediately changes to disappointment.
“Maddox… you’re kidding right?” You had really hoped he would say he was just messing with you.
“Baby I’m sorry. I swear it’s not on purpose, I promise.”
You fully turned to face him.
“But I was really hoping to spend some time with you, we have so much planning to do, we have so much that needs to be picked out-“
“I know Y/N, I know. I just have to finish this project and I promise my attention will be all yours.” He grabbed you by your shoulders and gave you a reassuring smile. “I promise.”
“I keep hearing promises and not seeing action behind it, Maddox. You promised with your last project that you would help me plan. Our wedding is at the end of the year and it’s already March.”
“Y/N I know when our wedding is.”
“Then act like it.” you shot back.
“If you would just let me focus on getting things done then I could do that, I have to work Y/N, I have things I want to do with my life. You knew what this was when we started dating.” He released you, the tension started to build in the room.
“Whatever, hopefully marrying me is one of the things you want to do in your life eventually.” You turned away from him, returning your attention back to cooking.
“Don’t do that Y/N, don’t act like you’re not my priority. I’m not San-“ Maddox stopped in his tracks. Yes, you told Maddox all about you and San, he wondered why your were at his party that day, so you told him. He knew how much San had hurt you, he knew the situation was hard to move on from, yet every argument San was being mentioned.
“Wait, I’m sorry Y/N.”
“Just go do your project Maddox.”
“Whatever.” He scoffed. Maddox said no more, he left. No fight back, no continued apology. He packed a bag quietly. “I’m going to stay at Eden’s, call me when you’re over it.”
You hated that this wasn’t the first time this had happened. Maddox had a tendency of being hurtful but you were understanding. You knew he was just under a lot of pressure and stress with work. He put up with a lot of your baggage and you wanted to do the same for him, so you did.
The next morning you sent him a text apologizing and asking him to come home, to which you got no reply. You sighed and looked at your laptop to continue your wedding planning. You checked your emails and at least got some good news. You and Maddox had custom ordered small bears with your last name on their bows as wedding favors for your guest and they were done. You were even lucky enough to find a local toy store that sold them. “Mountain of Plush.” They were ready for pick up as soon as 12pm. Since you worked from home that day you figured you mightiest we’ll make the trip. It wasn’t a far drive, only 15 minutes, it would take your mind off things.
You got in your car and headed over, on the way you tried to call Maddox and your call was sent to voicemail on the 3rd ring.
“Give me space Y/N.” Was all Maddox texted you. You sighed. You wanted so badly to be upset but you knew what you signed up for.
You arrived at the store and parked. You walked up to the entrance and looked over the store name again. “Why does this name sound so familiar?” You said to yourself. You ignored it and walked in anyways. You looked around, the store was adorable, various toys and plushies decorated the walls and shelves. There were even some anime and cartoon figures. Just as you were looking around, a voice could be heard.
“Can I help you?” That voice. That voice made your heart stop, it made your palms sweat, it made time move in slow motion. Your eyes followed the voice and there he was.
Choi San.
You both locked into place for a moment, feeling like you saw a ghost. You hadn’t seen San since a month after you broke things off with him. He would invite you over to try to fix things, you would talk, then yell, then have sex, then leave before he woke up. One night when he tried to contact you he found himself blocked on everything.
“I-, Y/N? What- What are you doing here?” He asked.
“Uh. I’m picking up an order I placed. San, is this your shop?”
“Yeah, you don’t remember the name I picked?”
“Well yeah I remember talking about it but I was hoping you would pick something else.”
That’s when the tension was cut with San laughing, you couldn’t help but laugh with him.
“Well everyone loves my name thank you very much.”
“Yeah, sure.” You playfully rolled your eyes. You both smiled at each other, you felt warm. Even with the colder spring air outside, you felt warm at this moment. “So, how have you been San ? I see your business well.”
He returned your smile. “Yeah, I’m really lucky, business is good and this place keeps me kinda happy.”
You wanted to question the kinda part but you felt like it wasn’t your place anymore.
“Here, follow me, I’ll take you to the counter to pick up your order.” You followed him to the front of the store. He got behind the counter and looked through the orders on an iPad. “It’s funny I didn’t even see an order under your last name at all.”
That’s when you remembered why you were there. “Right… it’s actually under Moon.” You said softly.
“Moon?” San chuckled while scrolling through order names. “That’s funny, what is that a fake name you use no-“
Before he could finish that’s when he saw the reason line, he gulped, his breathing picking up.
“It’s… it’s my fiancés name… I’m getting married.” You said, chewing on your lip and keeping your eyes on the ground. Why did you feel so nervous telling him that? Why was this awkward?
“I see…” he licked his lips. “Couldn’t go to any other toy shop huh? Had to rub it in?” He nervously chuckled.
“N-no! I swear I wasn’t trying to be like that! I genuinely forgot-“ you nervously tried to respond.
“Y/n, relax it’s a joke.” He smiled, he found your reaction cute. “Hey they don’t call it “the one that got away” for nothing amiright?”
“San… I… I don’t know what to say.” You felt bad for some reason. Why did this make you feel so terrible? You broke things off with San, why did you feel like you were hurting him? It had been 2 years.
“It’s okay Y/N, I’m happy for you. I swear, I’m glad you finally found the person who could do what I couldn’t.” San was genuinely happy that someone was making you happy. Even after being blocked, being angry, being heartbroken that he lost his chance with you. All he ever wanted was for you to be happy. He was hurt that he couldn’t be the one to do it but was happy it was getting done.
You smiled. “Thank you Sannie.”
“Anyways, this order is heavy, where is the lucky so and so? You’re definitely gonna need help carrying this out.” He said tapping away on the screen then walking to the back room.
“Oh, he’s working right now. I’m sure I can handle it.” You said as he placed 2 large boxes on the counter.
“He’s making you do this by yourself? You always told me if I didn’t help with wedding stuff you would push me into the ocean.” San said with a questioning look.
“Haha, what can I say, things change.” You smiled. You were lying. Of course Maddox should be here but you were currently getting the silent treatment so there wasn’t much you could do. “Like I said I’m sure I’ll manage.”
You attempted to pick the rectangular boxes up and San lightly smacked your hands away.
“No way, here I’ll carry it for you.” San stacked the boxes and picked them up with ease.
“No, I can't ask you to do that!”
“You didn’t ask, I offered. Come on, show me to your car.”
You wanted to stop him but you knew San, he has always been chivalrous and nothing was going to stop him at that moment.
You showed him to your car and popped your trunk, he placed the boxes in.
“Ooh, fancy car. Still doing math professionally?”
You laughed.
“Yes, San, I’m still an accountant.”
“You’re better than me, I could never willingly do math.”
“You run a business San.”
“Yeah but I just assume everything’s okay, I pay rent and all that on time and can afford stock.”
“San! That’s irresponsible!”
“I’m kidding, I have a math guy too. But if you ever want a new customer let me know.” He winked. “I’ll leave him with no remorse.”
Something about that dimpled smile and wink made your heart drop a bit.
“Well, thank you for helping me San.”
He shut your trunk. “The pleasure is all mine Y/N.”
“And thank you for the bears, I saw the progress pictures and they are beautiful. The Moon symbol for free was so sweet.”
“Yeah well you know me, I’m a sweet guy.” He smiled as he shrugged.
“Well sweet guy as a thank you, how about you come to my engagement party Seonghwa is FINALLY throwing for me.”
“Oh god, he’s that mean gay guy that hates me.”
“He only hates you because he knew how much I wanted to be with you and that we never dated.”
“Yeah, guess I really blew that.” There was a brief awkward silence.
“I’m sure you two are fine now though, right? Since he’s dating your friend Hongjoongs friend Christian?”
“Oh… well. I kinda don’t talk to Hongjoong anymore.” He awkwardly scratched his head.
“Woah, what? You and Wooyoung and Hongjoong were inseparable in College. What happened?”
“Well, it’s kinda embarrassing.” He avoided your gaze.
“Try me.”
“I kinda… blamed him for introducing you to Maddox that night…”
Silence. Again.
“Oh…”
“But it’s fine I swear.”
“Well now I feel like shit.”
“Y/n don’t! It’s pretty sure you were bound to dump me anyways.” San tried consoling you.
“Um… well if you want to come I can text you the address.” You quickly changed the subject.
“Yeah, sure.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket and as you watched him that’s when you noticed his body. He had on a pair of jeans and a grey fuzzy sweater with a purple apron that had his business name across it. He was much larger now, the sweater looks comically huge and cute on him.
“Actually I have the same number.” He said.
“Oh okay, I’ll text it now then.” You smiled and pulled out your phone. You texted him over the invite. His name read. “Do not text”. “Did you get it?”
“Um… you still have me blocked y/n.” He said awkwardly.
“Oh my god! I’m sorry.” You unblocked him and resent it.
“Got it.”
“Well that’s about enough awkwardness I can handle so I’ll see you there. It’s this Saturday!” You awkwardly smiled then raised your eyebrows.
San chuckled again. “Guess you’re right. I’ll see you Saturday if I’m free.”
You and San waved each other goodbye and you hated the butterflies that filled your stomach. You dropped your head on your steering wheel with your hands gripping.
“Why, why, WHY DOES HE LOOK SO DAMN GOOD?” You shouted to yourself as you lightly banged your head on the wheel. You connected your phone to your car then began to drive. “What the hell happened to karma, why did the break up make him so hot? I jus-“ Just when you were about to continue to curse the world your phone rang. Your face lit up hoping it was Maddox but instead Seonghwa’s name was plastered across your radio screen, you tapped to pick up the call.
“Hey Hwa what’s up?”
“Don’t what’s up me y/n, why did I just get an rsvp by the name “S. Choi”, this better not be who I think it is.”
You made a face, you knew he would kill you but you just wanted to be nice, you didn’t think San would actually come.
“Yeah, so remember the teddy bear thing? Turns out they came from Sans Shop.” You sighed.
“Ian… Ian…CHRISTIAN!” You could hear Seonghwa yelling for Christian to get his attention as if you weren’t on the phone anymore.
“Yes my love?” You could hear Christian reply vaguely.
“Remind me to fucking kill Hongjoong with my bare hands.” Seonghwa said.
“Of course my love.”
“Wait, why are you killing Hongjoong?” You asked, confused about what this meant.
“Hongjoong is the one that told me to tell you about that shop, I’ll never trust that sneaky bastard again.” You could hear the irritation in his voice.
“Oh calm down Hwa, it’s one night with him.”
“And I’m expected to believe he’s going to behave?”
“He’s changed Seonghwa, I talked to him for a while, he’s mature and sweet and… and-“
“And fine as hell and buff.” Seonghwa said, finishing your sentence.
“Th-that’s not what I was going to say!” You started to feel hot.
“Mhm, yeah, well I follow the son of a bitch on Instagram and I’ve seen him. He’s a sculpted, tan beauty.”
“Just gonna say that in front of Ian huh?”
“Oh I agree.” Ian said faintly.
“And Christian knows I would never leave him for that ass. Anyways, I don’t need that Greek god coming around and breaking up the engagement I worked- I mean you and Maddox worked so hard for.” He softened his voice towards the end.
“I’m not going to leave Doxxie for San, Jesus have some faith! San will come, see how happy and in love I am and then admit defeat for himself and go about his day.”
A deep and soulful sigh left Seonghwa. “Listen, if you want to trust that weasel that’s on you and your simple brain.”
“Hey!”
“But stop candy coating the past and trying to always find the good. You and San never technically dated and yet he broke your heart so bad. Not to mention the possessive nature he had. Me and you could barely talk without him wanting you home. The guy isn’t great!”
Right… you tried to ignore those things about San. Like Seonghwa said you two never dated but towards the end of your situationship San could feel you becoming more and more dissatisfied. The resolution to that in his mind? Love bombing. He would buy you random gifts, take you out more, go the whole 9 yards. But over time, it developed into something else. You would tell people you were single, because that was the truth right? But San would hold your hand and kiss you in public or at parties just to… assert dominance? He would get mad at you talking to other men, he would cling to you everywhere you went. It became suffocating after so long.
“I know Seonghwa…” you sounded like a child being scolded.
“…he can come. Just please don’t do anything irrational. I know you’re weak for him.”
When you finally arrived at your apartment, you saw Maddox’s car in its designated space.
“Ah! Sorry Hwa I gotta go, love you bye!”
You could hear Seonghwa try to tell to hold on but you hung up. You didn’t bother trying to get the box from the car and immediately rushed into the house. Upon opening the door you saw a large bouquet of flowers on the kitchen island.
“Hello beautiful.” Maddox said as he appeared from the bedroom.
“Oh Doxxie, thank you.” You met him half way and welcomed him into a big hug.
“Anything for you my love." He pecked your lips. "Are you excited for Sunday?"
You raised your eyebrow in confusion. "You mean Saturday?"
"Oh fuck, right Saturday!" He finally released you. "I have a little work to do then I'll head home and meet you there when I'm dressed."
You folded your arms. "Maddox... we were supposed to be riding together..."
"Oh shit, sorry, yeah we'll ride together, sure."
"...are you sure?"
"Yes, Of course baby." He gave you another kiss to get your mind off things, this one lingered. He held your waist as the kiss got deeper.
"Mmm, Doxxie, hah, wait." You said as his kisses traveled down your neck.
"Why? We have to make up, don't we?" He said as he sucked your brown skin on your neck, his hands were already moving your locs to the side so he could have more access.
You giggle and take his hands off your neck to hold one and lead him to the bedroom. "Come on, let's go to our room."
He laid you down softly, the soft blanket against your skin. He crawled on top of you and before chasing you down he looked over you.
"My beautiful girlfriend."
Girlfriend? Your arms reached up to wrap around his neck. "You mean fiancé and soon to be wife."
"Oh I know, just wanted to hear you say it." He smiled before finally kissing your lips again.
Your lips both passionately danced on each other, you could feel Maddox's hand coast the side of your torso until he found the end of your shirt then slid it inside. The feeling of lace met his fingertips as he cupped one of your boobs. He began to massage the pillow like mound of fat while his lips made their way down your neck. In a swift movement he released your chest to remove your shirt and helped take off your bra as well. He gave one of your nipples a few kisses before he latched on to it with his mouth, his other hand gripping the other. Soft moans continued to escape your lips while your hips mindlessly moved, wanting more.
His hand made its way into your leggings to begin to rub your clothed heat, wetness already building up.
"Already ready for me baby?"
"Always."
You two exchange the few words then lock lips again. You both rushed to remove the remainder of your clothes. You laid on your back, bare, in front of a naked Maddox while he lined himself up with your entrance. Just as he was about to begin pushing inside of you his phone began to ring. The loud default ringer going off on the bed while it shook due to the vibrations, his eyes darted to it.
"oh fuck." He whispered to him.
"Doxxie..."
Maddox looked between you and his phone.
"Could you just give me one-"
"Maddox!" You shouted as he winced while grabbing the phone.
"I swear I'll just be a second!"
He saw the look in your eyes, the look of sadness and disappointment, all you wanted was a moment with him. You just wanted to feel prioritized.
He swiped the bar to answer the call while mouthing an apology.
"Hello?" He said while taking his stance, you swiftly grabbed his arm.
"At least stay with me."
"Y/n, let go." He whispered away from the phone.
You deeply sighed and let him walk away, like a kid throwing a temper tantrum you decided to pull the covers over your head and pout.
After about 30 minutes he finally came back looking satisfied.
"Alright sorry about that-"
He found you still balled up under the covers.
"Just go Maddox..." Your voice filled with sadness as you knew what was next.
"I haven't even said anything."
"What are you going to say then?" You continued to keep your head under the cover.
"...I have about 15 minutes, do you maybe wanna-"
"It's fine Doxxie, just go to work." You kept telling yourself that you knew what this was, you knew what Maddox's job was. But how much more could you really take?
"...fine." He began to gather the rest of his clothes, you were going to just let him go but you would be doing yourself a disservice if you didn't speak up.
"When are we going to have time for us Maddox?" your voice is weak and unstable.
Silence, he opted to not respond and left.
Part 2 is coming very soon...
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arceoptryx · 1 day ago
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I’ve seen a lot of stuff abt dismp but I honestly have no clue what it is and don’t know if I want to open up a whole new rabbit hole. Could you help give me a framing for what it’s about and stuff?
Hi hi :3 thanks for asking Dismp (Divorcesteal) is a server made up of a lot of artists / writers / etc who were in the lifesteal community (a lot of us were also stream mods). While it uses a lifesteal plugin, a lot of the server is more interpersonal conflicts in relation to violent acts and the conflict between those who embrace the plugin and act more violent and instigate and those who reject the idea. As a player, its very fun to navigate this kinda of competitive server with a very low skill ceiling, as you'll have players build and fire arrow canons then drop their swords constantly when getting into fights. I'd say the current "lore" per say is about helplessness in the face of power, consequences for actions, insecurity and accepting love, and the conflict of differing playstyles on a "competitive" server. and gay marriage and divorce as you would expect by the title. everyone leans into storytelling, but not everyone is explicitly intentionally roleplaying a seperate character, most people act like more dramatized versions of themselves. There aren't any videos made on the server yet, but people do stream! Most would be happy to explain whats going on to twitch chatters if asked. Link to the vod archive that has a link to everyone who streams, we're trying to be better about filling it out but theres so much footage
My personal favorite moment of the server so far is The Eternal Winter, a vod where I have to survive hours in the tundra with my then serverlong enemy on stone tools and leather armor. and you can learn more about my team's huge plan in the vod "The 100 Million Block Problem" (other server members you CANNOT watch this vod" Some members who stream often are: Arceoptryx (me) Bettyisbaffled Chipseclipse QueenofAces Jay marshmarrows Many of us who don't stream, make art, write stories, webweaves, etc based on the server which you can find through the #divorcesteal tag :3 also a collection of screenshots, we have some really cool builds on the server. and also lava casts and horrible monstrosities.
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elgara-vallas-dalen · 22 hours ago
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I love this point, so to add to this: I'm not American, so the U.S. election didn't hit me like it did for many Americans and I didn't care about the timing of Veilguard's release in that regard, but I think the general point here is still true. Ultimately, Veilguard is a game about hope and a game that very strongly rejects cynicism in the face of tyranny and people abusing the endless power given to them. And it doesn't do that by bathing in grittiness and then having the Good Guys win, but it does it from its very beginning on. Varric proclaiming that he wants to talk to Solas, who is presented as a villain, because they used to be friends a decade ago, is exactly that and Veilguard is heavily rejecting a lot of conventions of many comparable games with stuff like that. And oh, fucking boy, I absolutely adore it for that. That's like a breath of fresh air in this media landscape that mistakes cynicism for maturity and hope for escapism. That's honestly what makes Veilguard special to me and more meaningful in its themes than most games released over the past few years, but it also explains very well why there are so different reactions to it. The way it's told is obviously conscious, and it's not just about queerness (although that is an important and beautiful part) but about how our current landscape of mainstream games has little idea how to tell stories of hope and kindness (especially in the face of a world that makes both hard) without treating both as completely unrealistic escapism or having some cynic side commentary. I get why that cynicism is so prevalent because it's also a big social coping mechanism, but I just loved how Veilguard questioned that. (Even more than Inquisition which, to me, makes the narrative of the series even better because I love how Inquisition and Veilguard are connected but tell very different types of narratives in different styles, no matter the similar setup.)
And this is not meant as an attack against people not enjoying Veilguard but rather to underscore the point that Veilguard does some things very consciously that appear to be divisive exactly because they are done consciously and because the point the game makes there doesn't work for everyone, especially on a emotional level. That's fine and even good and I'd wish more people would realize that instead of claiming Veilguard is "bad" or whatever.
Okay. I think I've twigged to a reason why this game is so polarizing for the fandom. Please, allow me to ramble about this theory in these dawn-light hours, pre-coffee.
You see, Veilguard is a fantasy. I don't mean its genre is fantasy, we know that. I mean that, for the first time, the story Veilguard tells is itself a fantasy. And a pretty explicitly queer one.
(vague and mild spoilers for Veilguard below)
A world where strict, seemingly narrow-minded mothers can accept and use their child's correct pronouns and be proud of them. And where entire organizations rally around said child to affirm them.
A world where a queer organization stands up to all flavors of tyranny, and while it may suffer great losses, is victorious in the end. Its future is one of supreme hope for lasting change because one of their founding members becomes the ruler of their nation.
A world where a common enemy ACTUALLY unites everyone to fight back and those efforts are welcomed, even from those whose ethics are questionable. Because now really ISN'T the time for in-fighting. There will be time to discuss your morally dubious recruiting methods AFTER the world-ending calamity has been vanquished.
A world where the return of a tyrant is stopped, because the people joined hands with friends, neighbors, and loved ones and refused to let go.
And then they WON.
(depending on your choices, in the end love LITERALLY wins (the love was there and it mattered after all).)
To me, Veilguard is clearly a response to its development cycle. It hit its stride during the height of the pandemic, when people were sick and dying en masse, and most people felt more isolated and helpless than they had in generations. Facism was (is) on the rise across the world. And a very queer and neurodivergent development team looked at the world they lived in, then at the one they'd created, and made some choices about the story they would tell.
And then it released mere days before the US election. I finished playing it on election night (or rather the wee hours of the next morning). And can I tell you? This queer, neurodivergent, nonbinary person NEEDED this story. This exact story.
But, maybe not everyone needed it. To my reckoning, it's the first DA game to take such a firmly hopeful and positive approach to its storytelling, and that's bound to be divisive in a fandom as... Opinionated as ours (affectionate, mostly 😂 ).
Genuinely, I am sorry if it wasn't what you wanted or expected. I'm sorry if you felt let down by your favorite franchise. That fucking SUCKS.
But know that, for some of us, it was a lifeline in a very dark and tragic week, and I suspect it will remain so in the months and years to come. I hope that, if you ever need a dose of pure hope, you might give Veilguard another try.
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thewritetofreespeech · 2 days ago
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Can I request NSFW headcanons for Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Halsin, Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor being spanked by his female s/o after she received his consent please?
Astarion
Astarion was originally joking at first. ‘Oh yes. Spank me. I’ve been a bad boy.’ kind of thing. He never thought she would actually go for it or be open to doing it.
He feels a little obligated to do it after that. Astarion doesn’t want to back down, but there has been a lot of beatings in his past for the sexual gratification of others. He’s never liked it though.
With her, it’s different. It’s only a few taps but it feels completely changed. As if he knows it will stop if he wants. That the sting is not just hurting just to hurt. That he can trust them.
He doesn’t hate it nearly as much as he thought but doesn’t think he will ask for it again.
Gale
Gale likes to push the limits, and feels all manner of sexual exploration should be, well, explored. As long as it’s just the two of them.
He has read, of course, of people who like to be spanked or hit during sex. Gale is fairly certain he would not like to be hit, but the spanking does excite him. He has as dominating woman kink a mile long after all.
Furthermore, having his sex life be totally incorporeal for so long, Gale is aroused at all ideas of corporeal play.
He likes it a lot more than he expected and is a little embarrassed. He isn’t sure if she could tell or not how much he enjoyed it, but is a little too embarrassed to ask again and hopes his clever girl figures it out.
Wyll
Wyll isn’t too sure how the topic came up for him to get spanked, but he’s willing to try anything once.
Maybe it’s his own curiosity has gotten the better of him again but he’s interested in what it feels like.
Terrible at the set up for it. Like ‘should I just drop my pants and….’. No art to the build up for such a moment. The first spank sends a spark through him. One that gives him a jolt. The ones after aren’t nearly as enjoyable.
Wyll is glad that they tried it but doesn’t think it’s for him. So they will just catalog that as lesson learned.
Halsin
Being open to all experiences, Halsin has been spanked before. He really had no opinion on the experience but is open to trying it again.
Given how big he is, he does enjoy being the submissive one from time to time. The spanking lets him relax this way. Hand over control to his partner for a while.
Also the pain is exciting. He only enjoys it if it’s his partner’s hand, however. Halsin doesn’t like to be hit with things. Although….maybe some rope vines. The feel of her hand caressing the redden flesh of his ass. Feeling it tingle and pucker at her touch excites him.
Halsin won’t ask for this treatment on his own, but is always open to it when she wants to initiate it during sex. He’s honestly more embarrassed when she smacks his butt in passing when they are out over when she spanks him in bed.
Dammon
Dammon is a little shy about the request, and it takes him a little while to work up the nerve to ask his partner if they will do it for him.
He’s not sure why he decided to ask. Being around men and soldierly types most of his life, Dammon had overheard the stories they shared while waiting for their gear. The one about being spanked always stuck with him.
He blushes about as red as Rolan when told to get on all fours on the bed. Arms shaking like he’s swung his hammer for days. When the first strike happens, Dammon decides that he doesn’t like it.
It’s not the pain, he can handle that, but he’s decided that he doesn’t like people behind him when he’s naked and he can’t see her face while they are doing this. He apologizes for not being able to follow through, even though this was his idea, and offers to have sex the usual way.
Rolan
For Rolan you would have to trick him into it a little. His pride would not allow him to kneel or bend to anyone (not again).  
He would need to be convinced that he would look so sexy bent over, with a mix of ‘well, if you don’t think you’re strong or secure enough’ for him to do it.
Of course, he takes the bait like the typical brat that he is. And like a typical brat he really enjoys it. Rolan knows that he is difficult, stubborn, and downright pigheaded some days. He knows someone should put him in his place but he’s too scared to give up control to anyone. Until she came along and turned his world upside-down. Took the weight off him a little. Put him in his place for good.
He makes no comment on whether he enjoyed it or not. Too embarrassed about his own pleasure. But, he is noticeably more calm. Until he isn’t and starts acting bratty again; which means he wants another spanking from s/o.
Zevlor
Zev is a little insulted by the request. He’s fine with experimenting, but spanking? Given his advanced age it seems a little out of place. Like he’s a child or something.
Of course, he’s willing to try it. The position is the worst part of him. Being…exposed and vulnerable like this is not a natural state for him as a warrior. However, he tries to remain calm.
When it starts, however, Zevlor actually enjoys it. The numbing pain, the position, the sub verse scolding manner of spanking. After everything that happened he felt like he should be punished, but nothing seemed to satisfy. This seems to satisfy both.
In his darker moments moving forward, Zevlor will ask for this. To submit, not think, and be punish for his failings. To be comforted after his equally important to him and he doesn’t want to stop.
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pipperoo · 2 days ago
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finally finished fantasy high junior year and of course my brain had to, against my will, start making an au for the npmd guys. it's so bad that i literally had to doodle some of them
this au is still very much in its infancy and might probably stay there, but i had some ideas for these guys. richie is also included in this au, i'm still working out the kinks for his design
but essentially it would start with the six main characters starting their freshman year at some adventuring academy and after some event, are forced to be in a party together for the rest of the year. they all really don't like each other at the beginning, but eventually grow closer as they uncover the evils that have taken root in hatchetfield (this is just the vague synopsis)
steph is a high elf sorcerer, grace is an aasimar cleric, ruth is a half orc bard, pete is a firbolg wizard, max is a tiefling barbarian, and, honestly, still kinda struggling with what richie would be, for now, he's an air genasi rogue (very much could change) [below are their basic designs, which turned out not too bad]
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i'll put more of my idea below the cut, but this au may not be really fleshed out completely anytime soon, gotta a lot of wips with little time on my hands. but check it out if you're interested (and, this is probably a long shot, but if you have ideas for richie, i would love them!! please)
Just to be very clear, this is a DND au, specifically an au of Fantasy High which is a Dimension 20 show that I love very dearly. A lot of the worldbuilding would be heavily based on that world (so I use some terms that are from fantasy high throughout this, but I think it's still very understandable if you haven't watched any of it. But if you don't know a lot about DND, this may not make the most sense) But, I still have Hatchetfield twists and this is mainly my own story I'm coming up with, there's inspirations, but still mostly my own.
I'm, first of all, imagining that Hatchetfield is much like Elmville and exists in Spyre as some modern town. So all kinds of species and magic exist in this world. Most of the people are raised up as adventurers like any DND world.
So, basicially the big bad would be the lords in black. They would operate as gods that are in the same pantheon and pretty much share power with each other. Wiggly would operate as the leader, but they are equal in regards to strength. The one being keeping them in check and preventing them from taking over the world is Webby. They once existed in the same pantheon before Webby left. She and her few remaining followers aim to counter their ploys.
The Lords would give anything to eliminate Webby, but as long as she has followers that remember her name and believe in her, she remains a God. They are constantly trying to hunt down followers of Webby, but they are far too elusive.
But, there still remains a chance for the Lords to stop Webby once and for all and purge the world of her followers. There is a prophecy. (I don't have the exact wording yet) Essentially it claims that one of the Lords' devotees will have a child that is imbued with Webby's powers at birth. On the first blood moon after their fifteenth birthday, the child has the choice to devote themselves to the Lords or be sacrificed in the Lords' names. Either way, the Lords will finally be given the power to strike down Webby for good. With the child, they'll have an edge over Webby that they can capitalize on. The child devoting themselves would be making a warlock pact and sacrificing is sacrificing. Until this child is born, the Lords wait.
The devotees are, of course, the Church of the Starry Children. They are devoted to the entire pantheon. I'm still debating the exact people involved, but the Youngs, the Monroes, and Solomon Lauter are for sure there. They operate in secrecy, also waiting for this child to be born. In the meantime they try to gain higher up positions within the town so they can aid in the taking over the world when it occurs. Solomon is the mayor.
As another avenue for the Lords to gain more power, they gain individual followings. They do this by tricking their followings into believing they are some different god. The heads of these individual churches know who the real god is, but no one else. The corruption runs deep in Hatchetfield.
One of the centerpieces of Hatchetfield is the adventuring academy (place holder name is Blim's Battling Academy) ((Jeff Blim would be the principal)). This is a place that acts as the highschool where young adventurers learn how to succeed in their chosen class.
The character at the heart of the story, that's at the center of it all, is Stephanie Lauter. She is a High Elf, like her father, and she was born as a Divine Soul (chaos affinity) Sorcerer (as the nepo baby she is). She is the child from the prophecy, but does not know about it and doesn't know what her father really does. She's had that white streak in her hair since birth. She is not thrilled to be going to school and being forced to join a party. She has that same rebellious spark from the musical and hates authority just as much. She has some grasp on her abilities, but knows very little of why she was given these powers and from who. Though she won't admit it, she wants more of an understanding and she doesn't often feel worthy of these powers because she did nothing to earn them. She's disliked her father ever since her mother vanished without a trace one day and he refused to tell her what happened. (That was due to some Nibbly stuff)
The next important character is Grace Chasity. She was born as an aasimar to human parents. She was seen as a blessing to them. Her celestial heritage shows through her white hair and white freckles. She was raised in Blinky's pretend church (I still need a name for what Grace believes it to be.) She is a Domain of Order Cleric. She believes that following her deity is the best way to go and has some superiority complex because of it. She does have one secret though, that her parents have always urged her to keep hidden. She is a fallen aasimar which means that her divine energy manifests as a necrotic shroud and through skeletal, flightless wings that appear on her back. (This occurs when they were touched by dark powers in their youth which was Blinky in her case, but Modify Memory was used on her, so she doesn't remember it) She fully believes this darkness is who she is and will do anything to cover that up.
Another character that is pretty fleshed out is Max Jägerman. He is a red tiefling that was born to his human father and tiefling mother. Max also lost his mother to something when he was younger. He is a Path of the Zealot Barbarian. After Max's mom vanished, his father turned mean and distant. The only path to gain his attention was through worshipping his deity (Wiggly). Max himself doesn't have as much understanding or faith in this God, kept in the dark a lot. He only does it to appease his father and that is so strong he gets the same effects as if he was worshipping the deity directly. When he rages he gets a little radiant damage bonus to his attacks. He is still the same asshole from the musical, like he seriously sucks and is a massive bully (honestly, kinda like Ragh before his redemption arc), but he didn't go to middle school with any of the characters. (The plot hinges on the fact that none of them really know each other.) He is, of course, a major player on the blood rush team (this world's version of football)
For the nerdy trio I have less fleshed out ideas, I also want them to have a tie to the cult, but I still need more time to think on it.
Ruth is a Half Orc, born to half orcs (her tusks are kinda supposed to like the head gear she wore, though I might still give her head gear). She's never felt compelled to use her natural given strength and instead finds that her passion points more to theater and learning to be a bard. She still is very anxious, so her Charisma is not the best and therefore she's not a very good bard yet. She is a College of Spirits Bard. She's not the best with persuading others and her connection to spirits further ostracizes her. She doesn't have the best control over the spirits she conjures. Her arc would be about gaining the confidence to be a true bard and to step into her potential. There could be a possible Pokey connection too.
Pete is a firbolg, like the rest of his family. He is a a Chronurgy (time manipulation magic) Wizard (this is from the Explorer's Guide to Wildmount, so Critical Role, but I think I'm still going to go with it because it fits him too well). He has no idea where these time manipulation powers have come from, they're sometimes out of his control. He likes to keep his head down in his studies, to be invisible. He is still reeling from the disappearance of his brother, who vanished without a trace, he also had shown some Chronurgy abilities before he was gone. He sometimes pokes around and look for answers, but nothing has come up yet. He doesn't have a good feeling about it. (Tinky would be Pete's connection).
And for Richie, I still need to think of his basic arc, I really don't know yet. For now, he's an Air Genasi and a Scout Rogue, but that is not set in stone. I think he would definitely be a rogue, but he could be a phantom rogue and have that connection to Ruth with the spirit stuff. Again, would love other opinions!
So, basically the main plot is them having a Bad Kids situation where they all get detention or miss out on choosing a party and they're all forced to be in a party together. There are a lot of contentions in the beginning, but they begin to unfold the mystery of the church of the starry children and the prophecy Steph's in. They get closer as they share their insecurities and help each other grow from them. The ending would be them facing down the cult and stop Steph from playing her role in the prophecy. (The loophole is that Steph has the choice, she's not forced to make a choice. She still has the option to opt out and stop them from gaining her power.) I also have Grace discovering the origins of her religion and choosing to change deities. Right now, she changes domains to the Tempest Domain (basically going from order to the natural chaos of storms because Grace is more unhinged than not and she should be free to have that chaos) Pete finds out where Ted went, Tinky got him, and where his abilities stem from (i think he would eventually switch classes to multiclass artificer, but that would probably happen sometime later). Max faces off with his dad and learns the truth about his deity. Ultimately will stand against him and start the process of finding another source for his rage (most likely Path of the Totem Warrior and choosing the wolf as his totem spirit)
The only ship I currently have is Steph/Grace, from what I set up, it's kinda the obvious choice. They have contentions because Grace is struggling with being a fallen aasimar and Steph, who did nothing for her powers, automatically having this divine energy. Something that was not given to Grace regarding her heritage when all she does is maintain faith. And that hits a sore spot for Steph because she deep down doesn't believe she deserves it either, but has it regardless. She wishes she had the choice for her class, that she wasn't stuck, and hates that Grace had the option and chose that. That's what I have so far (Grace also has those contentions with Max because of his faith and how, despite the fact he's a tielfing and asshole, he's still gifted something radiant, but these two will just be friends) More ships may be added, but who knows
This is what I have so far, I may continue with this and may even write it one day, but not in the near future at all. I want to make each of the storylines more equal, it seems like I have a lot of focus on some but that's only because those ideas came pretty easily first. Steph is the heart, but I want more balance and more plot given to the nerdy trio. Again, if you have an idea for Richie (Please) or any other ideas for this, I'd love to hear it!!! And, thank you for reading it to this point, I ended up having a lot more than I thought!!
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thefirstknife · 3 days ago
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I wasn't aware of the discussions around Eramis being that rancid, personally (although I tend not to look at online discussion around media in general, thanks to how skin-deep at best much of it tends to be).
But the way you've talked about it makes me wonder how much of the people complaining about Eramis's character development are coming at it from a dislike of the idea of that redemption being a thing at all- the perspective that Doing Bad Things makes someone A Bad Person who can no longer be A Good Person, essentially. Seems like that mentality has grown... if not more common, at least louder, over time.
(Although your comment about not seeing why they'd 'pull a shocking twist for the sake of pulling a shocking twist to spite the audience' is a little funny in a sad way, considering how many people seem to think "outwit the audience and surprise them" is more important than "tell a coherent story as well as possible", even changing things if a twist is leaked, even if whatever they change it to makes no damn sense.)
It's really bad out there and it's strange for the exact reason you listed, because the same communities have previously entertained redemption ideas about characters like Calus and even Clovis; characters who have never expressed any wish to change or any beliefs that they may be in the wrong, no regrets and no remorse for what they've done.
So I can't even figure out if this with Eramis is about not wanting redemption stories. I think it's more about Eramis herself; not only is she a female character, but she's very largely and easily misunderstood. A lot of people's interaction with Beyond Light was... not entirely invested (a lot of the community was at the time mad about vaulting and hated everything new on principle), and her other storylines are in seasonal content that's gone now and that was almost universally hated; she was brought back in Plunder and then reappeared briefly in Defiance. A lot of people approached her from the get-go as "just some villain we will kill in the campaign" and then that didn't happen and these people were confused because they never paid any attention to her story. And then by the end of it, it just kinda slipped them by.
I don't know honestly. I may be overthinking it, but I definitely think that a lack of understanding of her story plays a huge role. Whether that's because they missed her story or just didn't pay attention to it or just had no interest in it - and nobody online they interact with offered any insight into her character (lore youtube) - they just don't get what's the fuss and they don't care about her. Some might say this is because the game didn't make people want to care, but I simply disagree. While I enjoy Eliksni stories, they're by far not at the top of my list of favourite things in Destiny so I don't have any special attachment to Eliksni characters, I didn't know Eramis before BL and I was never a diehard fan of her, but I understood her story and what they wanted to do with her for the past 4 years.
And I was happy that she got her character arc completed as was intended. I saw where it was going and this solution is the only one that made sense to me. So I don't think the whole "the game didn't make me care enough because it was badly set up" really holds water. The game can't put thoughts into your brain, sometimes you have to actually think about characters for yourself. Like, we shouldn't have to be spoon-fed that hard. Her arc and the setup was clear and it was written into the game's story, a lot of it even outside of lore books ("It was just in the lore books!" is a major complaint a lot of the time, and one I personally find baffling. You're in the Lore Books The Game. If you don't like lore being in lore books, you're in the wrong place).
We could honestly discuss this to no end, and everyone who dislikes Eramis or the conclusion to her story would probably have a different reason for it, or there would at least be a couple of them, not wanting redemption included. Could also be a combination - not understanding her story will lead a lot of people to think that her being redeemed makes no sense and that it wasn't supposed to happen.
I think it's also a case of people having a really hard time understanding that a character can be our ally while still hating our guts. I've seen plenty of comments from people saying they're annoyed about Eramis constantly being antagonistic towards us. This is baffling to me, because again, it makes sense that she doesn't like us. And it would be bizarre if all Eliksni were now suddenly fans of humanity like a hivemind. Some will never like us. This is good. They will still help us because there's bigger fish to fry, but they don't have to like us.
Eramis was a delight this episode to me and she was a really interesting character. She wasn't a huge deal overall and some of her story was fairly on the sidelines, but she was a very unique "villain" and antagonist to us since she was introduced and I think that her character arc was very well done all things considered. This amount of resistance and dislike for her from the wider community is something I simply can't see as anything other than a lack of understanding of the story (personal reasons and stuff like "I get it, I just don't really care that much" not included).
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yiangchen · 2 days ago
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as much as i love bellarke, i think a kiss (on the lips) would have been too much in the s2 finale. clarke had already been forced to mercy kill finn and lexa had just betrayed her. and then bellarke committed genocide. all in the same season. girl was going THROUGH it. i also think the cheek kiss is fitting. and that much more heartbreaking somehow. it’s like. i am too broken to offer anything to you. all i can offer is this short-lived moment of intimacy, and then i have to go. you deserve so much more than me. you know that’s what she was thinking despite his pleas for her to stay.
now, i could see an au where he convinces her to stay, but only if they don’t stay in arkadia but go somewhere new. there are so many post s2 au fics where t100 and bellarke settle by the sea and i absolutely ADORE that concept. in a world where they were going to be cancelled after two seasons and knew about it, i could see this happening and there’s a montage implying everyone lives happily ever after and bellarke gets together eventually.
season 3 is a tricky one. because that season is A Lot…as we all know lmao. they were definitely being set up in the first few episodes. however, gina’s and lexa’s deaths very quickly make things kinda complicated. i love the idea of bellarke happening during hakeldama (all of the emotions were coming out and that kneeled down hand hold was insanely romantic), but only in a universe where bellamy and gina either weren’t together or she didn’t die. i honestly think gina wasn’t going to exist originally and that s2 set up bellarke to happen in s3, but then lexa’s popularity caught the writers off guard, and they decided to go the c/lexa route briefly. so then gina was added in. and things very quickly became a kind of love square (bellamy’s jealousy/hurt over clarke working with lexa and raven telling bellamy “too bad you were never that devoted to gina”). it’s honestly wild looking back at how blatant that was. before the bellamy, clarke and echo triangle, there was the bellamy, clarke, lexa and gina square (and before that there was the bellamy, clarke, finn and raven square…but that’s a discussion for another day!)
anyway, moving on to s4. i do agree that they probably considered clarke making it to space or bellamy staying on earth, but only in a universe where they were going to be cancelled. bellarke never spent a significant time in the same place off screen. i think that was intentional. we were never meant to miss any of bellarke’s story. and if they had gotten together over a time jump, we would have missed so much. i do think it works in the case of a cancellation though. i can see it so clearly. when clarke comes back and sees that he didn’t leave, she’s furious, asking him why, and he’d probably say something sappy yet sarcastic about how it’s kinda hard to listen to his head when his heart is telling him he’s in love with the girl he’s supposed to leave behind. idk who kisses who, but let me tell you, this would have been the KISS we had been waiting for. and then! cue montage of bellamy and clarke surviving together and meeting madi and becoming a family and then five years later reuniting with everyone in space and in the bunker.
on a side note, it absolutely kills me that we will never know what bellamy was going to say in 4x06. you are so right though. the writers know and they never went anywhere with that. just like the radio calls. absolutely tragic…
speaking of the radio calls, i would just love to know what was running through their brains with that one. oh to have been in the writers room during that discussion…
it's still so fascinating to me that bellarke was supposed to happen in 6x10/6x11, bob was informed of this, but then he received the script and it didn't happen. that's just so sketch. truly what was going on behind the scenes. it's just so WEIRD the more you think about it. also makes me wonder if that was the first time that had happened. i mean, we already know that there were changes to the 1x08 script to get rid of the line where bellamy asks clarke to run away with him, so i don't think it's that far outside the realm of possibility to think that there were other romantic lines/scenes that were cut throughout the series. i honestly think every season they probably toyed with the idea of them happening, wrote a first kiss or a confession or maybe an almost kiss, decided against it and thought hey actually let's push this to next season, drag it out a little longer.
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mt-oe · 9 hours ago
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Hey dears!
Thank you so much for understanding ;; I was honestly very scared because it felt like I was making excuses. Don't worry. I'm getting professional help currently and I'm trying my best. People like you deserve the best in life.
On another note, I love this idea so much ❤ I've always wanted to write something like this but often forget to or life just gets in the way. In a way, this kind of helped me push towards that agenda.
Hope you enjoy! Mwa mwa :*
note/s: not proofread, implied afab reader, she/her for mizu, fluff, menstruation
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"Just a little bit more."
...you told yourself for the nth time this afternoon. What could have been a productive afternoon which could have been filled with adventures in the local markets ended up with you staying indoors while your wife looked for whatever she could buy with the little money you had.
It wasn't like you wanted to stay inside. You wanted to help her. You really do. However, the past few days, your back had been acting up badly. At first it started with a dull pain, a slight throbbing pain on your lower spine whenever you walked or stood up for too long. Then, the pain started turning into a constant ache. A type of pain that felt like your spine was creaking and was about to snap at any moment until you couldn't take it anymore.
Mizu never really understood your pain. Both of you had extremely irregular cycles, her's probably worse, but her goddamn pain tolerance was something to be envious of. And whenever her periods did hurt, she was never one to dwell on the pain. This woman was immovable.
You, however, were a different story.
Sometimes you'd lay on a bed of leaves, looking at the stars with your eyebrows knitted together, teeth gritted, and a fist punching your lower stomach lightly in a steady rhythm, wondering if you were some kind of disaster in your past life to deserve this pain.
Thankfully, your wife never really judged you for that.
At first, she was insistent that you kept pushing on your travel, that it was just a little bleeding. However, no matter how cold her exterior was, her heart couldn't take the sight of your pale lips and the sound of your stuttered labored breathing. It didn't take long for her to crumble and for you to burst into tears in her arms.
After some time, both of you sort of eased into it.
Well...mostly her.
Periods never really became easy for you.
This led you to your current situation now.
The two of you had just settled in a small, fancier inn last night. Usually, the two of you would find a cheaper place to save money, but the growing exhaustion on your face and the sluggishness of your movement began to concern Mizu; thus, both of you settled on the first inn you saw.
It was slightly more pricey than the ones you usually settled in, and that made you feel a bit guilty. Despite her insistence that it was okay, you promised you'd make it up to her by helping her look for cheaper food options in the market. However, this morning, you surprisingly woke up feeling like hell. Your nose slightly congested for some reason, your skin feeling a bit more sensitive, and worst of all, your back sending waves of pain with each movement. You didn't know what was going on. You were pretty sure you were doing a good job at keeping yourself healthy despite the conditions the two of you were in.
Each gust of wind against your skin felt like a dull blade attempting to run across the smooth expanse. The congestion of your nose was making the simple task of boiling water a chore. You couldn't go out like this and both of you knew it. Even if you did try to help, you'd end up risking getting sick anyway.
After several attempts on trying to convince your wife that you were okay, that you could go with her, she finally shut you down. Her tall figure towering over you for a moment before a soft audible exhale passed through her nose. Warmth covered your being as she slowly yet tenderly wrapped her arms around you, kissing the top of your head, leaving you with no words and the silent reassurance that it was fine.
A little while later, you soon grew bored of tidying up and undoing and redoing your hair, and decided you were going to wait for her to come back. With your hand alternating between massaging and lightly pounding your back, you got up and made your way past the silent hallway, footsteps echoing, and sat down on the genkan.
It was...an odd place to stay, yes, but it was better than the lonely confines of your room.
Sighing softly, you rested your head against the cypress beam, eyes staring at the door with a sense of unexplainable exhaustion. A slight churning sensation twisted in your gut as the minutes turned an hour, and the hour turned into hours.
You knew Mizu was strong, but what was taking her this long? Yeah sure, Mihonoseki wasn't exactly known for vegetables, but buying some shouldn't take you hours.
Was she okay? Did she run into trouble? She had always been a magnet for trouble. Did she get scammed? Did she run into some prettier woman who she wanted to wife up more than you? Nononono—
'Okay, let's stop overthinking,' you thought to yourself, taking a deep breath in. Besides, your back was an even bigger problem right now.
Straightening yourself up, you slowly exhaled, closing your eyes as you took another deep breath in an attempt to ease your ache. The pain wasn't actually dissipating, but you liked to think it did.
As the cycle of you taking a deep breath in and exhaling slowly continued, your body slowly started relaxing despite the miserable ache your spine was feeling. Taking another deep breath, your hand stopped massaging your back and fell on to the smooth varnished wood beneath you. The sound of the busy street or the footsteps of the guests in the inn seemed to fade in the background, your eyelids relaxing. Before you could even process it, sleep enveloped you like a blanket of comfort.
Some time after, the door slid open quietly, allowing the breeze to enter the warm constraints of the establishment. Mizu's figure entered before pausing at the sight of you curled up near the entryway. Her cold eyes softened, feet automatically carrying her towards her love with soundless steps.
A soft exhale passed her nose as she crouched down, setting the produce and herbs she had just bought down. Gently, her fingers made their way to your cheeks, caressing them as if you were made of porcelain. Her thumbs made their way to your eyelids, feeling the warmth under them. Then, your brows, gently gliding over them and making their way to your temples which she gave a soft press. A small, almost undetectable smile tugging at the corners of her lips.
Mizu continued to admire your features a bit longer before deciding to stop. Taking a quick look around, she placed her purchases on your lap, moving your arms to hold them loosely, and hooked her arms under your knees and around your shoulders. She tightened her arms around you as she stood up, carrying you bridal style, adjusting to make sure you and the things she bought were secure as she brought you back into your room.
The soft plush of the futon greeted your skin as she set you down to do her own chores quietly. It was a comfortable silence. The type that she was only able to feel around you.
Soon, the sun had set but you were still deep asleep. It was starting to concern her, but you weren't showing any sign of a fever. Unable to think of a reason for your body's distress, she did the best course of action she could think of which was to rest.
A little while later, a soft groan rang through the air as you woke up. It was dark and you could barely see anything. However, one thing was apparent to you. You were no longer sitting on the genkan and the sun was no longer up. Blinking, you tried to make things out through the darkness and recognized your wife's figure.
Your eyes widened a fraction before softening. With a soft touch, your fingers combed through her hair in a steady pace. Usually, the feeling of her strands across the pads of your fingers would comfort you. However, this time, you couldn't explain it but it made you feel...guilty.
Has she been waiting for you all this time? Oh gosh, she probably carried you all the way here. "Love..." you whispered breathily before sighing. It was a small thing but a lump in your throat was forming. You felt so grateful and yet so guilty. So touched yet you wanted to sob just from imagining her carrying you.
However, the emotional rollercoaster you were in was abruptly cut off. Maybe the tea you had this afternoon was starting to terrorize you because goddamn you needed to go relieve yourself. 'Great fucking timing,' you huffed to yourself mentally. Shifting a bit, your face soured even further.
Why the fuck did your clothes feel sticky? Greaaaat. Now you were just plain annoyed.
Ignoring the ache in your back, you pushed the covers off and got up, making your way towards the outhouse. With each step, the more your discomfort grew. You couldn't really see it through the darkness but you could feel a patch of wetness on your behind and it was NOT helping your mood at all.
Leaves crunching reverberated through the air as you approached the outhouse, glaring at the squat toilet. The stench was catalyzing the growing disgust boiling in your system. At this point, all you wanted to do was piss and go back and crawl into Mizu's arms.
However, the moment you lowered yourself, an odd feeling of something jelly-like leaving you alarmed you. Your eyes widened as you froze and slowly looked down.
A clot.
Immediately, your eyebrows furrowed, panic starting to set in you. Grabbing the back of your kimono, half a gasp and half a groan disgustedly escaped you upon seeing the red taint your digits.
This seriously couldn't be happening right now.
You already felt so guilty, making your wife spend so much money on an inn and making her go out alone. Now, you had to be an even bigger burden.
Your breathing grew shakier with each breath. The guilt was starting to weigh down on you. Poor Mizu. Always having to deal with you. How could do this to her? Thoughts continued to flood your mind as tears started to line your eyes. You were feeling so many shitty things right now and you felt so fucking bad. Shit. The futon was probably stained too. You didn't even bring a cloth with you right now. Your clothes would be so fucking stained and smell so fucking bad and—
Fuck. You can't take this anymore.
Sobs softly left your lips as you stood up and glared at the ground. You couldn't even bring yourself to go back. Everything hurts. Your tummy, your back, and not to mention how sticky the drying blood was. You also felt so bad and so ashamed for making Mizu deal with your errands the whole day. Soft trembles racked your shoulders as the tears continued to drip down from your eyes.
Suddenly, you saw a pair of feet stop just in front of the wooden enclosure of the outhouse, prompting you to stop. You couldn't see the person's face and who knows what they intend to do. "It's occupied," you muttered, sniffling softly.
"I know," the sound of your wife's gruff voice could be heard. Her feet turned towards the entrance, about to walk towards it before she stopped, deciding against it. "Are you alright?"
"No," you immediately shot back, regretting it immediately. Your guilt dug deeper at how harsh you sounded but...you can't help it. You felt so damn frustrated.
A squeak reverberated through the air as Mizu leaned her weight against the wooden panel, a silent sign that she was waiting and listening. Your eyebrows furrowed while you looked at her feet, wondering how could she be so patient with you. Taking a deep breath, you opened your mouth to speak, "I'm...bleeding."
She didn't reply immediately, her eyes flickering between her two feet as she thought of how to respond. After a moment of silence, she finally replied, "I know. I saw it on the sheets."
"But that's not what I'm asking," she continued, pushing herself straight. "I'm asking if you're alright." Her tone was firm but soft. You could tell that she wasn't mad. It wasn't like a 'no' you barked out sufficed. You weren't okay, and she knew that, but she wanted to know how she could help.
The question that left her lips, the softness, everything invoked another sob from you, unable to handle how loving she was. "No," you repeated, voice quivering. "I don't know what to do. I bled onto my clothes and the futon too," you started to spill.
"As if that wasn't bad enough, I didn't bring a cloth and it stinks here and I feel so guilty for leaving you to look for supplies and...and now I'm being so unreasonably emotional," you began ranting.
Mizu's eyebrows furrowed at your sentiments. She remained silent once again before she audibly exhaled. "May I come in," she asked.
You nodded even when you knew she couldn't see you before sniffling out a small 'yes'. Grass crunched underneath her feet as she walked in. In her hands was a cloth. "What's that for?" you asked.
"Lift your kimono up. I'll help you," she said, already approaching you. Your sobs reduced into soft sniffling as you lifted your kimono up obediently. Immediately, she began tying a fundoshi on you, making sure it covered what was needed before she took off her coat and wrapped it around you, hiding the blood on your clothes. Each movement, each touch firm yet soft at the same time.
"Let's go inside," she breathed against your ear, hands on your shoulders and gently guiding you inside.
As soon as the two of you were back in the comfort of your room, she immediately helped you change into more comfortable clothing, tossing the bloodied ones in a pile along with the futon covers.
Now both of you sat on her futon, a hot cup of tea in your hands while you spilled your feelings out to her. Turns out the reason why Mizu took hours in the market was because she had already suspected your period before you even realized it and had decided to buy some medicinal herbs to ease your pain. Learning this, you began to wrack up in sobs again, making her eyebrows knit together ever so slightly.
Her rough, calloused hands swiped against your cheeks, feeling the heat radiating from them, wiping your tears off. Your eyes look up at her, head resting against her shoulder. "I'm sorry," you sniffled quietly. "I don't know why I'm feeling this much. I swear I'm not trying to—"
Suddenly, the feeling of her pulling you closer cut you off. Your body froze for a moment and slowly, you wrapped your arms around her. You could hear her soft, slow breathing against your ear, the rhythm calming your tears down slightly.
She continued to hold you close tenderly as the time passed by, nothing but comfortable silence between you. With a soft, content-sounding sigh, she pulled away, eyebrows relaxing at the sight of you looking at her with those glossy doe eyes before she pulled you in again. Despite not knowing what to say or what to do to comfort you, she still wanted you to feel reassured that she wasn't mad nor did she feel burdened.
The comfort of her being around yours helped ease the storm of emotions boiling in your heart. As you calmed down, you felt her strength push you down carefully, laying you down to rest and joining you. With the love she enveloped you in, your eyes started growing heavy until you finally fell asleep.
It didn't matter how bothersome your period was. Mizu was always glad to be with during this time. The same way you always are when she needed you, she'll be there with you when you need her. Always loving.
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