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[cryptidofthekeys]

Introducing... Buddy Baffle!

TRIGGER WARNINGS: ‘’Cannibalism’’ (i mean is it REALLY tho?), Death, Murder, Blood and Gore, and Taxidermied Humans are mentioned

Also unfortunately I hid stuff in the google doc but I can’t do that shit here on tumblr so it’ll be strikethrough here (ugh I wish I could hide the text so much but it’s important to be included so oh well)

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| Name: Buddy Baffle

| Nicknames: Was often referenced as BB the most, also went by Bud, Budz, and Baff

| Pronouns/Sexuality: He/They/It and Buddy is Pansexual

| Best Friend: ? ? ?

| Height: 6’8”

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| Status: Not too much is actually known about Buddy Baffle, as they were scrapped fairly quickly, this is assumed to be because of some potential budget cuts and also the kids didn’t seem to care about them as much.

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The Whereabouts of Buddy Baffle are currently unknown and he has pretty much disappeared into obscurity, unless you were a HARDCORE fan of the show when it was around you probably wouldn’t know who this is.

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| Species/Race: Puppet (Buddy, much like the others is pretty much a sentient puppet, needed no one to control/work him)

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| Occupation: “It was fine at first… And then… It would sometimes… O-Oh my f*cking god… I-It fucking ate them sometimes… Other times, he’d f*cking TAXIDERMY them! …I-I need to… I gotta get out of here- f * c "k”

. . .

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It was said Buddy Baffle owned and managed a local diner ‘Buddy’s Baffling Diner’ but there are no signs nor remnants of the diner left

“…That anyone knows of”

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| Hair Color: Buddy’s hair was made from yarn and it was Black (they’re hairstyle is a Mullet by the way)

| Eye Color: It’s eyes are Blue

| Skin Color/Body Type: BB’s skin was shown to be a gray sort of color and it was portrayed as a big puppet (aka BB is essentially fat)

. . .

“This thing always gave me the creeps, it’s smile… They’re eyes… Just… EVERYTHING about him! I’m glad this thing was scrapp- …W-Wait… What the h*ll was that noise?”

. . .

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| Appearance: Buddy Baffle was depicted to have a very large smile plastered on it’s face at all times, despite they’re colors not being the brightest (the only bright colors on it were the blue eyes and the outfit he wore) it always had a smile on its face.

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BB’s attire seemed to be a light pastel pink polo shirt with a light pastel blue apron over it, the apron said the name of Buddy’s diner on it (in fancy cursive letters) and they also wore a little work hat (kinda like a square looking cap, I have a ref image if anyone needs more info) (btw Buddy’s nose is p much the uh rectangle shape)

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(themed with the colors of they’re outfit, both the pink n blue I mean- the hat was the blue color and the words which also said the name of Buddy’s diner were the pink)

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It wore pants (also the same colors, both pink and blue, two colored pants essentially) and finally he wore a pair of sneakers also themed with the colors of his outfit.

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BB wore only a golden wristwatch, no other forms of jewelry, it had no scars (they are a puppet, no need for those) he had some thick eyebrows which could be a bit of a key indicator for its actual emotions due to the permanent grin on its face.

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“Had to smile, had to smile all the time, even when . . . nothin’ else, nothin’ else, nothin’ else… So now, it's their turn… t h e y  a l w a y s s m i l e”

. . .

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T, visibly shaken: “I w-went backstage one night, to check and make sure nobody was messing around with the puppets or anything… A-And dude… I-I f*cking saw him…”

J: “Saw who?”

T: “B-Buddy…! I-It had BLOOD, man! BLOOD ALL OVER HIM!”

J: “Oh [[REDACTED]] quit foolin’ around! Yer just seein’ things or tryna freak me out”

T: “No man! I’m f*cking serious! It had blood on its apron! C-Come see!”

J, exasperated: “...Fine… If this is a joke though, I’m reporting you to [[REDACTED]]”

“...He won’t ever believe ya, [[REDACTED]]... Best stay outta mah business…”

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| Personality: BB always had a cheery disposition, it was said to be very friendly, outgoing, a true extrovert, and got along with anyone and everyone! Sweet, kind, caring, a heart of gold! Would help anyone in need and always eager to feed someone who might be hungry.

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It was believed in Buddy’s segments it would have taught the kids about food related things and the importance of food (EX: A healthy breakfast, how food is fuel that the body needs, etc) often the other puppets would come in, sit down, have some breakfast or lunch, although it’s unknown who Buddy’s best friend was.

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BB was rarely ever seen out of they’re diner which made things easier for the crew considering how big it was. (There were said to be one or two episodes where it moved)

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"Th' others don't seem to remember me... But I remember t h e m..."

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BB had a special item written on his menu titled ‘Buddy Baffle’s Special’ it was vague and never specified what it meant although it was requested by a lot of the other puppets quite a lot.

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(there was a rumor that there was going to be an episode titled ‘What’s So Special About Buddy Baffle’s Special?’ in which BB would reveal what the special written on its menu actually was but unfortunately, Buddy got scrapped before it could air)

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T: “...I-I know what was in that special… I-I saw it… I seen wh-what he did… Nobody will believe me… I’ve TRIED to tell them…! Buddy just… Stares and grins at me, I know he’s always grinning but… Something’s different about it when he looks at me…”

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BB also had a bit in which he’d play a guessing game with the audience, it would give hints to certain food related items and one of the viewers (kids) and other puppets would have to guess what food Buddy was thinking of.

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Buddy’s closing segment was usually after that bit and BB always ended with reminding kids (the viewers) and other puppets to eat good and healthy foods, that food was fuel for the body, etc and of course he ended with waving to the camera “Y’all take care now, ya hear?”

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| Side Facts: BB was depicted with a southern accent, specifically a Texan sounding accent, his tone was originally going to be deep and gravelly but due to that potentially scaring the kids, they changed  the voice to make it sound a bit more soft spoken and gentle.

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Considering the perma-grin on his face, it’s unknown how he actually seemed to eat but they were definitely able to. (Buddy would sometimes also give food themed nicknames to the one or ones he seemed particularly close with)

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In Buddy’s Baffling Diner, there would always be some instrumental country/bluegrass sounding music playing in the background somewhere (BB enjoyed that sorta music a lot, in fact, even though they didn’t get a chance to use it)

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BB is often depicted with heavy sounding footsteps (it is a big lad after all)

…so you’ll know if he’s coming :-)

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There is some concept art that showed Buddy to be sitting on a hillside, playing his banjo under the moon.

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There isn’t TOO many pieces of art involving BB however because as I said previously, they were scrapped fairly quickly, but some of the pieces aside from him playing the banjo include the following:

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1: Concept Art of BB’s overall and general design

2: Buddy in its diner, whistling while flipping a burger patty with its spatula as some of the other puppets walk in and wave at him from the kitchen.

3: A design of where BB actually lived, the original drawing was damaged and desecrated but…

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The artists managed to scrounge up a bit of an idea of what it looked like, BB seemed to live in the woods, in a small wooden cabin with a rocking chair out on the front porch

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WARNING!! LICENSED FOR PRIVATE EMPLOYEE/STAFF VIEWING ONLY. ANY PUBLIC PERFORMANCE, COPYING, SELLING, VIEWING, OR OTHER USE OF THESE DOCUMENTS AND TAPES IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED.

. . . . . . .

T: “...Do you think Buddy’s gonna be mad when we tell him about this?”

J, sighing: “Doubtful but even if he is, h*ll, I’d be mad if someone told me they were gonna do that to me, scrapping for puppets is basically d e a t h the equivalent of getting laid off”

T, now worried: “...I dunno, should we EVEN tell him?”

J, rolling his eyes: “Oh relax, Buddy is understanding, I’ve NEVER seen them get angry before in my life, I don’t even think it CAN get angry, now let’s go, I wanna get this over with and get home”

. . .

“...[[REDACTED]] told me they were gonna scrap me, I didn’t like that… Not one bit…”

J, after telling Buddy the bad news, now walking to the entrance of the place: “See [[REDACTED]]? That went well! Just like I said it would!”

T, still seemingly worried: “...I dunno, something about him seemed… Off… …I hope it’ll be okay”

J, now annoyed: “Oh for f*cks sake, they’ll be FINE… He’s probably just processing the news in his own little way, now, I’m going home, I’ve had a long day and I want to get off my feet”

T, about to say something but refrains: “...Okay…”

. . .

“Scrap ME? SCRAP M E?!? So they just wanna throw me away like trash?! Wanna get rid of me?! And for what?!? Cuz I ain’t makin’ them no D A M N money?! Cuz those stupid… B R A T S don’t like me well enough?!? Well… I’ll show them! I’ll show them ALL! Ain’t NOBODY scrappin’ Buddle Baffle…”

“...Not if… …If I… . . .  S c r a p  t h e m  f i r s t. . .”

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“[[REDACTED]] saw me ‘’scrapping’’ someone… …Nobody believes him :-) I scare him …I’ve never scared anyone before …It’s… N e w… A change …I like it”

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J, beginning to walk home, about to get into his car before he runs into something ..Someone.. In front of him: “...What the… What are you doing here, Bu-” J is suddenly cut off as he falls to the ground, unconscious.

. . .

T, staring off into the woods before looking at his camera: “...I… I saw it… I saw Buddy going back to his cabin, but he was dragging something behind him… It looked like… Like… A… . . . A Bodybag…

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When I got closer after they had gone inside… I saw it… It was a fucking trail of blood, I… The others won’t EVER believe me unless I do this, this is the ONLY way… I… I gotta get evidence…”

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T can be seen, slowly approaching Buddy Baffle’s Cabin in the distance, the camera cuts to when T is standing on the front porch, peering in through the window: “...D*mmit… I can’t see sh*t… I… I need a closer look”

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The camera cuts again, only to reveal T now inside the house and staring at a door, he proceeds to open the door and it's revealed to be a staircase leading down into a basement, there’s a light, it’s dimly lit but he can see enough to get down.

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The camera cuts once more and now T is now peering out from a corner, standing directly in front is Buddy Baffle itself, but something is… Wrong… BB’s breathing is more heavy, it sounds… Excited? T zooms with the camera to get a better look.

. . .

BB moves away from what appears to be a stainless steel table, T has to stop himself from gasping in horror at what he’s seeing through the camera lens, there, on the table, lay a body, whoever it is, is dead… T cannot see who it is from this angle so he risks moving to another area to try getting a better look.

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T pauses when he hears BB grunt, it sounded a bit… Frustrated, upon peering out, it seemed the other was having trouble finding the right tool so T kept moving, after a few moments more… T finally saw who was on the table…

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…It was… J… Buddy had killed J, and it took T every fiber of his being not to vomit right then and there. He watched in pure horror as Buddy began walking over, heavy footsteps booming against the concrete, a large cleaver in hand.

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The camera shows Buddy beginning to chop up the dead body on the table, cutting off J’s head, arms, and legs, more blood dripping and beginning to stain the floor along with Buddy’s apron, after finishing dismembering the body, a chuckle from Buddy is heard on camera before he starts picking up the body parts one by one and dropping them off over in a freezer.

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The camera then makes a sound, a loud sound that echoed throughout the basement, indicating a low battery which caused T to panic, especially when he heard Buddy’s voice holler out “HEY! WHO’S DOWN HERE?!?”

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The camera begins to shake and jostle, and T is breathing heavily, crying even, this seems to indicate T is now running, running for his l i f e as an angered Buddy bellows out in the background, loud booming footsteps now running as T tries to scramble up the stairs.

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Suddenly, T screamed, and then the camera was shown to go flying, it eventually landed on the ground, the screen cracking somewhat but the camera was still functional and rolling, it was pointed to a wall, the only thing visible were Buddy’s shadow along with T who can be heard crying and begging for his life.

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Buddy is then heard chuckling, but clearly in an angry tone “Y’ALL THINK Y’ALL CAN SCRAP ME?!? WELL… I’LL SHOW YA! I’LL SCRAP ALL OF Y’ALL FIRST!” And then, some rather grotesque sounds of stabbing and slicing can be heard, some blood spraying on the wall and onto the camera… T screaming out in agony before suddenly going silent.

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…The final thing the camera captures after the stabbing and slashing sounds stop, is the sounds of Buddy’s footsteps growing closer and closer, eventually, the camera catches Buddy himself, but only a little bit of their legs and shoes before immediately cutting to static.