#i get a vibe that she's almost indifferent from time to time but is mistaken as being demure and it takes time to understand her feelings

[paragonrobits]

idea for a joke about Falin masking in an opposite way from Laios (Who really doesn't mask at all, from what I've seen) because her default expression is eyes closed and faint smile and people make incorrect assumptions about that and don't realize she isn't necessarily communicating anything in particular because they don't get how she's actually expressing herself so Marcille assumes she is communicating approval and/or affection for her until Laios informs her that Falin always smiling around her doesn't necessarily MEAN Falin is smiling at her specifically, that's just how she looks normally

(he does indicate that Falin DOES like her, but she's not expressing it in a way Marcille has learned to notice yet)

but i honestly don't know enough about how Falin emotes in canon to be sure if this is a canon compliant joke or not

[mentalpolaroids]

hey if you’re still doing requests for blurbs can you do one for john b with 10 and 13. where he shotguns a beer to empress the reader and jj had shaken the beer before he gave it to john be just to mess with him and the reader won’t let go and makes fun of him. it’s just playful and sweet

The Party Trick

[gif creds @maddiecline]

Blurb request | 10. You just prepare yourself, baby + 13. I think it’s funny to see you all red and embarrassed

John B x female!Reader

Warnings: swearing, underage drinking

Thank you lovely for sending in the request, I had a lot of fun writing this one! Hope you like it 🥰

It was her birthday, and for the first time in many years of celebrating her birthday with the absence of her parents, she didn’t feel sad or abandoned. Her parents spent more time on planes and private jets than at home, with her, and her birthdays weren’t an exception, something the girl had grown used to by then, the disappointment in her heart being gradually replaced with indifference. This year, for the first time ever, she was actually excited for the special day after deciding to take advantage of having the house to herself and throw her own birthday party and celebrate with her closest friends. Or only friends really. Being a Kook didn’t give you many options on what to do with that status: you either preached it and fit in, or you hated it and despised the stuck up mentally and the pointlessly expensive lifestyle. So, seeing that her closest and only friends were four always-in-trouble teenagers from the Cut, guess which one she chose.

Spending almost an hour in the basement digging through old decorations to try and give a nicer vibe to her backyard, she finally finished hanging some fairy lights over the trees by the pool. The soft music playing from the speaker and the nicely put table full of snacks and drinks made her smile in excitement for finally getting a chance of having a decent birthday, not the pity parties from previous years.

The doorbell ringing made her heart skip in excitement, which only increased when she opened the door and was greeted by four pairs of arms engulfing her in a heartwarming hug.

“Happy birthday you tiny bug!” John B said, being the last one to let go of the group hug.

“Thank you you annoying seagull!”

“Why a seagull?” he asked, chuckling.

“I don’t know, it was the first thing that came to mind.” she laughed along with the freckled Pogue.

She led her friends to the backyard, telling them to get comfortable on the reclining chairs by the pool as she handed each one a cocktail she had made earlier.

"Ooh, fancy." Pope commented, examining the colors and the decoration on the glass.

"It was my first time attempting to make these, hopefully it tastes as good as it looks." The girl replied, sitting on the chair next to John B's.

"Not bad," JJ said, after taking a sip of the drink, "but no offense, I think I'll stick to beer. This shit is way to Kook-y for my ego."

Kiara rolled her eyes at the blonde's words.

"It's really good (Y/N), you nailed it."

"I second that." John B added, winking at the girl beside him, who winked back and clicked her glass with his.

"Why thank you my dear friends."

After a few drinks, more specifically beer, the music was turned up and Kiara pulled the birthday girl to join in on her dancing, leaving the three boys to not so discreetly enjoy the show. Pope's eyes could be mistaken for heart shapes as he admired Kie move around with ease, elegance and a free spirit. John B didn't look much different, except his eyes couldn't leave (Y/N)'s figure swaying to the music while wearing a genuine smile that mirrored his own. That left JJ, who was hushly making fun of his friends for being so whipped but at the same time so stupid for not making a move on the girls.

"You two look really stupid right now, I hope you know that."

"Jealous you don't have anyone to look at, JJ?" John B asked, his eyes still on (Y/N).

"Nope. Got this lady right here." he answered, holding up his beer can, "You know what you two should do?"

"Not sure if I wanna know." Pope interrupted.

"You guys need to make a move, alright? How much longer do you plan on walking around with that embarrassing grin on your face every time you see them?" he pointed to the girls.

“I’m good, thanks.” John B replied.

“The fuck you are.” JJ grabbed another beer can, “Let’s start small, ok?”

“What does that even mean?” Pope asked, still reluctant about wanting to know what JJ's plan was.

“You gotta impress the lady, alright? Your ugly face won’t cut it.”

John B rolled his eyes at the insult but, as usual, didn’t pay much attention to his rambling.

“What do you want us to do, exactly?” Pope asked with uncertainty.

“Just go call them over here and then play along, ok?”

“This is gonna be stupid, I just know it.”

“A little faith, John B, alright?”

“No can do, buddy.” he answered as he got up to, for some reason, do as JJ said.

“You ladies up for another drink?”

“Sure!”

“Always!” Kiara and (Y/N) answered at the same time, following John B back to where JJ now stood on his feet with the beer can extended for John B to grab it. He raised his eyebrows questioningly at the blonde boy, not sure what to expect from him.

“My boy John here,” JJ rested his arm on John B’s shoulder and handed him the beer, “is gonna show us his party trick.”

“I am?”

“Yeah, you are. (Y/N), you should keep an eye on this one, alright?”

“Oh-kay.” she answered apprehensively, curious as to what was about to happen.

“You know what you have to do, man.” the blonde winked and took a few steps back.

John B knew what party trick his friend was referring to, he just didn’t expect for it to work on the “impress the lady” plan. He was sure (Y/N) had seen people down a beer in under 8 seconds, but decided to shrug it off, have fun and just go with it.

“So what is this famous party trick?” (Y/N) asked, eyes on John B.

“You just prepare yourself, baby.” he winked playfully, making her giggle.

His confidence soon vanished when he opened the can and the liquid inside flew straight to his face with no warning. He could feel drops of beer on his eyelashes making him almost scared of opening his eyes.

“Oh shit!” he heard (Y/N)’s voice, with a tone both shocked and concerned.

JJ’s laugh was almost as loud as the music still playing in the background, Kiara and Pope telling him to shut up but they couldn’t help but laugh too.

“JJ, if I were you, I would start running.” John B said after a while, his fingers rubbing his eyes so he could open them.

“Dude, your face!” the boy could barely talk from laughing so much.

“Yeah, your face, are you ok?” (Y/N) asked, stepping closer to John B, “I swear I saw that beer go straight up your nose?”

“Yeah, I kinda feel it.”

“Come on, “ she grabbed his hand, “let’s get you cleaned up.”

She led him to the kitchen and let him wash his face in the sink as she grabbed some paper towels for him to dry his face.

“That was quite a trick I must say.” she teased, seeing him close his eyes in embarrassment.

“That was the confirmation I needed to never, ever listen to JJ again.”

“What did he suggest this time for you to end up getting a shower of beer?” (Y/N) handed him the paper towels after he finished washing his face.

“It was stupid and it doesn’t matter.”

“I think it does.” she smirked.

“Are you having fun with this?” John B pretended to be annoyed but he was actually enjoying the playful conversation, and enjoying even more the fact that they were standing a lot closer to each other now.

“Yeah, I think it’s funny to see you all red and embarrassed.” the girl reached her hand up to move a piece of his hair sticking to his forehead.

“Is it now?”

“Yeah.” they both pretty much whispered their words, they were close enough to hear each other's heartbeat at that point. With another playful smile, (Y/N) moved her hand to his jaw, a pointer very lightly caressing his bottom lip, “I think you still have a drop of beer right here.” she knew it was a lame thing to say, but it was fun being this flirty with John B. And even more when it was reciprocated.

“Really?” he asked, his voice still hushed, and she nodded, her eyes never leaving his, “Then you should do something about it.”

Not wasting anymore time, she leaned forward and finally sealed their lips together. The kiss was short, almost just a peck, seeing as she wasn’t done teasing. John B raised an eyebrow and nodded slightly, as if accepting the challenge.

“Uh oh,” he circled her waist with his arms and brought her even closer to his body, “I think I got beer on you. I should clean it, you know?”

She giggled, her arms wrapping around his neck.

“I think you should too.”

And with that, they kissed again, this time more passionately, silly grins still attempting to break their lips apart.

His hands couldn’t stay put in one place of her body, her curves making him lose himself in her and her fingers ran through his hair. She could feel some wet strands from the sticky drink but she didn’t care, too emerged in the adventurous but exciting boatride that was kissing John B Routledge.

“Ah, I knew it!” JJ’s voice echoed in the kitchen but it wasn’t enough to break the couple apart, “Yo, Pope, it worked, it’s your turn buddy!” he yelled, going back outside.

“Never gonna happen!” Pope fought back.

They finally broke apart a few inches, foreheads touching, eyes still closed and the greatest feeling in their veins by standing in each other’s embrace.

Guess John B could impress the lady after all.

[veryfashionabledesigns]

Analyzing the Snicket Aesthetic, Part 1/5: Time Period, Technology, and Medicine

.-There are quite a few fan theories placing the main events of ASOUE in the 80’s or 90’s, which is plausible, if not quite probable, in terms of the technology present in the series and the timing of the real-life publication of the books. On the other hand, I’m a shameless hipster and I live for that retro aesthetic, so I like the ambiguity.

-The post-post-apocalyptic theory is a fun one, but it can be a little limiting—not to mention difficult—to apply too many practical implications to this universe. Realism is all well and good, but it can easily be discarded for the sake of a good yarn or a pointed bit of commentary.  

Figure 1: The Illustrations of ASOUE are mostly influenced by the woodblock prints that frequently appeared in Victorian fiction--black and white, hatched shading, realistic perspective—while those of ATWQ vaguely resemble Modernist and/or Cubist art—subtle color, solid shadows, and slightly warped perspective.

(Continued under the cut)

        -Anachronisms everywhere, of course.  One of the books mentions a blacksmith and a computer repair shop in the same sentence. Events and media from before, during, or (infrequently) after the date range are regularly referenced.

        -Personally, I mix and match from a date range of about 1890-1980, for reasons we’ll get into over the course of this analysis, although this is really quite a large range, and even then it’s rather approximate, and can change depending on which version of the story one is referencing, and even from book to book or character to character.

-Time does not pass normally like in the real world. The atmosphere of ASOUE feels a bit older (gothic, vaguely turn of the century) than that of ATWQ (noir, 1930’s-40’s), but the latter is set before the former (see fig. 1). History has been run through a blender set to puree.

TECHNOLOGY

        -It’s sort of lowkey steampunk/dieselpunk. Relatively little sci fi tech is floating loose in the world, but given the materials and time, Violet would almost certainly come up with some fun retro-futuristic inventions.

        -Violet’s inventions involve mechanical and electrical technology, but seemingly nothing digital. She’s largely indifferent (and in the books, possibly even disdainful) in response to the “advanced computer” at Prufrock Prep, which always struck me as a bit odd. Maybe she distrusts Nero’s vague assertions that it will deter Count Olaf, maybe she prefers a more hands-on approach to inventing, or maybe she has the soul of cranky old lady.

Figure 2: Prufrock’s advanced computer in the Netflix series features cameras, a CRT monitor, and something resembling an oscilloscope.

        -Computers exist in this universe, but they don’t seem to do much, and there aren’t very many of them. Smart phones, laptops, and similar devices of the 21st century are almost certainly not around.

-In the books, Prufrock’s computer can display a recognizable image of Count Olaf and is compared to a toad in appearance, meaning it was likely modeled after PCs from the 80s and 90s.

-In the series, it’s even more anachronistic. The monitor looks more or less like what was described in the books, but it also comes fitted with a built in camera, much like a modern webcam, and can recognize faces about as well as most characters (although this really isn’t saying much), implying some kind of primitive deep learning capacity.  

Figure 3: A few computers that could fit in the Snicketverse. (The Apple 1, hilariously, is the real thing.)

-If the internet exists, it’s pretty useless. The first season of the Netflix series has a few references to the internet, none of which are relevant to the plot. The internet makes everything easier, and the Snicketverse is all about inconvenience and suffering.  

-Photographs appear in both black and white and color, although the color is quite grainy. The shift to color photography occurred gradually throughout the 20th century.

-Hector’s self-sustaining hot air mobile home is really quite impractical, if not impossible. A proper hot air balloon would require quite a bit of fuel to keep the air inside the balloons sufficiently hot. Historically, airships of comparative size would have filled their balloons with hydrogen and/or helium, which, barring leakage or other damage, could actually remain buoyant more or less indefinitely. Hydrogen, by the way, is very flammable.

-The submarines in The Grim Grotto are steampunk as heck—that is, realistically impractical but really friggin’ cool—likely inspired by early science fiction such as Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. In real life, submarines rarely have portholes; in warfare or high water pressure, they could potentially be a weak point, and they’re fairly pricy for something that isn’t strictly necessary. There are a few exceptions, though, such as in subs designed for tourism or marine biology.

Figure 4: The Quequeg has a number of features solely for the comfort of its crew, such as this lovely library with paintings and antique-looking lamps. The use of brass and copper tones, as well as the warm lighting reminiscent of gas, oil, or early incandescent lights, also add to the steampunk vibes.

-Mobile phones do not appear in the books. As with the internet, they’re just too convenient. Should they be necessary to your story, however, there are a few ways to work them in. The movie featured telephones built into cars, which is actually pretty cool. In real life, portable phones have existed since at least the 1960s, although they were too large and expensive to be popular with the public until recently.

Figure 5: The Radio Common Carrier, a sort of mobile phone introduced in the 1960s.

MEDICINE

        -If Heimlich Hospital is typical of the Snicketverse, then the medical technology of the time is… not good.

        -For all the bureaucracy and paperwork depicted, there seems to be very little control over what sorts of operations are actually performed. Count Olaf can waltz in and say he needs the operating theater for a “cranioectomy,” and nobody seems to question it. It’s entirely possible that the amount of paperwork required is so massive that nobody can really keep track of it all.

        -Patients at Heimlich Hospital often ask volunteers for simple things like a glass of water—implying that the hospital is severely understaffed.

        -It is unknown what happens if a Volunteer is seriously injured in the line of duty. V.F.D. may have its own medics/infirmaries. Alternately, they may try to recruit medical professionals who will treat patients without revealing any secrets. It is also possible that volunteers are expected to lie to their doctors, or that the healthcare system is such a mess that nobody really asks questions when someone turns up with a suspicious injury.

        -There is some good news: near the beginning of The Hostile Hospital, Klaus mentions antibiotics and shots (likely referring to vaccines). From this we can assume that many of history’s nastiest plagues (i.e. tuberculosis, cholera, scarlet fever, etc.) are more or less under control. (Although I personally headcannon that Mr. Poe’s cough is an early symptom of tuberculosis, as this would be a fun little shout-out to Edgar Allen Poe.)

        -The rusty knives used in Violet’s “surgery” imply that doctors could get away with some pretty lousy sanitation. In the Netflix series, the entire hospital is filthy.           

Figure 6: The operating theater in The Hostile Hospital is similar in structure, if not style, to the one at the Old Operating Theatre museum, built c.1822.

-Public operating theaters like the one seen in the Hostile Hospital were gradually replaced by sterile operating rooms as doctors developed proper understanding of germ theory between c. 1860-1900. (See fig. 6). Notably, the set design for the operating theater in the series uses a 19th century layout with mid-20th century materials and lighting.

        -Treatment for mental health conditions is given little attention, which is troubling; sooner or later those poor kids are going to need some therapy. If memory serves, one of the patients at Heimlich is described as looking sad but otherwise healthy, suggesting depression.

        -Given how dystopian the Snicketverse is, PTSD and anxiety are probably quite common—especially among V.F.D. members, who often wind up in very dangerous situations at very early ages. In fact, one could make a solid argument that childhood trauma might be behind the neuroses of characters such as Aunt Joesephine or Hector—both of whom, despite having severely debilitating anxiety disorders, never seem to receive any treatment.

FANTASY ELEMENTS

         -There are very few of these, but it’s far from realism. Some rough rules of thumb would be to avoid things typically considered supernatural (i.e. dragons, ghosts, vampires), but things that are not quite possible (i.e. babies can bite through concrete, reptiles can be trained to imitate human speech on command), or possible but very improbable (i.e. a harmless snake being officially named “the Incredibly Deadly Viper” solely for pranking purposes, a phony surgeon convincing a crowd that decapitation is a risky but necessary medical procedure) are all well and good.

         -It should be noted, however, that at least a few characters in-universe believe in the supernatural. In the Ersatz Elevator, the Baudelaires are briefly mistaken for ghosts, and in The End, Ishmael claims to predict the weather using magic.

[oneslyfuhsaz]

elounor does have chemistry, if not there wouldn’t be any elounor shippers. Couples aren’t all over each other all the time, you have to realize that. They just like to keep it private, I can’t see how Larries dont see how they love each other?

Hey Anon, thanks for the ask!

I don’t think chemistry between Eleanor and Louis is the reason for Elounor shippers.  I think it is the idea of them together that they love, and they are not necessarily able to decipher the good from the bad.  They are blinded by the idea of their relationship, and will ignore signs of anything that is counter intuitive to their ideal world.  I am going to guess, Elounor shippers are fans of both Louis and Eleanor, thus for them the perfect world would be if they were together in a loving relationship.I mean they both are beautiful and some believe they look good together (I am not one of those people, as I feel they look miserable with one another).  They will not see how their relationship would look to others, just what they believe is an ideal situation.  Now, if there was actual visual proof of longing looks, gentle touches, and passionate kisses, then I would say Elounors have some ground to stand on, but I haven’t seen anything of the sorts (maybe you can send me some). 

Furthermore,  you can love someone but not be in love with them, and that is the vibe I get from Louis and Eleanor.  Even the small glimpses we do get, I find them very cold and indifferent with one another. 

Here are four opportunities wasted by El and Louis in the last three months which could’ve driven home how serious their relationship is:

Ski Trip:  The fans get one picture from their trip.  Now mind you it was a cute selfie, but we get no smiles, no real expression; they almost seem put out by the fact they have to take one.  

X-Factor:  an ideal situation for Eleanor to show her support for Louis, and when we got pics or videos of her, she looked bored, uninterested, on her phone, and lacked emotion. We saw her a couple times at the house, but she decided to hate on the people who were watching the live feed instead of being social.  Eleanor was never with him when he left the building after the shows (at least wasn’t photographed), or shown coming into the building with him.  She was rumored to have left early on most occasions during the auditions.  

His birthday:   Epic fail.  They take no public pictures together, they sit across from each other in the vehicle (maybe) on their way, dances with her friends and is no where near Louis in the videos, and walked in front of him while his sister walked beside him.  I don’t care if there were photographers or that he was wasted, you walk with your boyfriend and help him if he needs it…No love shown by her.  

Christmas and New Years Eve , no picture of them together or even next to each other.  You could argue Christmas as a private moment if they spent it together, but there were pictures of Louis and Eleanor on New Years and they were not looking much like a couple in love.

Maybe they are super romantic in private, but I think it would be okay to share a little of it with the fans.  A soft touch, a longing glance, a smile, or even a non friendly looking hug would suffice, but we get nothing.

Although we don’t agree on the level of chemistry between Louis and Eleanor, we do agree on one thing...some couples do not always show PDA.  I can see your point about keeping their relationship private, especially due to the LAX incident where she was attacked by some crazy b*tches, and the hate she gets but doesn’t deserve from fans.  With that said, if I am not mistaken, Louis was in favor of PDA, but he could have changed his mind over time.