#i generally trust y'all here but don't make me turn off reblogs.

[dirtyoldmanhole]

i'm going to be musing about one of gunter's most controversial lines here just because i've been idly thinking about it while drawing.

heads up for dead dove shit.

context: the JP version of Fates:Conquest had a region-locked minigame ("skinship" where you basically pet the character with your stylus lol) where you the player could interact more with a married gunter if you went that route - it also had several JP-only lines which you can read here.

generally they aren't that much different in tone than the EN ones though fun to read (especially since the minigame is lowkey sexual in nature; all the cast's lines were more strongly sexual not just his), but there was one line that uh. raised some eyebrows in the EN fandom when the fan-translators found it, shall we say.

in bold; (i've added some of the others for helpful context; i don't believe all of them are said one after the other, as it's whenever you choose to enter the minigame one is said).

By no means did I think these feelings would develop… Close your eyes for a moment. I apologize… I thought just touching you would be fine… When you touch me like that… Don’t tease me too much… or even someone like me won’t be able to endure it. (TL: He uses the verb “tawamureru” which means to play, joke, or flirt but I decided to liberally change it to tease) You’ve returned. We mustn’t… Oh no… I thought of you as a child but… I love you. Haha… is something the matter? Is it fine for me to touch you too? This side of you… don’t show it to anyone else. My wife… does cute things… I love you. I might have regarded you with special feelings ever since you were young. (A RANK:) Thank you very much for being kind to me to this extent. For as long as you wish it… I promise never to leave your side. (S RANK:) I thought I would always live alone. But you… lit a flame once more in my heart which I had locked away. This time I won’t let you go. I love you more than anyone else.

(... once again touched at how surprisingly romantic he can be)

anyway! oh yes, That Line.

tsk tsk.

given his position of power with essentially raising corrin, you can imagine how some people who already disliked the ship tended to leap on that line as "proof" of him sexually abusing corrin as a child to put it bluntly.

thoughts are still rotating, but roughly in order of:

instinctively (and the most boring position just to get it out of the way) on the first level i don't like how often this line is immediately whipped out to dissuade gunter/corrin shippers specifically but also shippers in general from engaging with taboo sexual concepts. especially when it's just as boringly... crudely blunt as "pedo". (slightly adjacent to gunter fans in general since there's sometimes an uneasy feeling that as long as you don't ship him that way with a 40-year age gap/parental figure/etc there's an exception carved out as "one of the good shippers" as long as you ship him with less of a power differential (eg gunter/shura. note i dig that ship, this is just an example.); though i think this sentiment has thankfully died down as of late versus the early years of fates fandom.)

god that is such a fustratingly common and boring way to engage with media. moving on.

on the second level down, i also instinctively dislike the feeling that it's whipped out to flatten the potential of gunter being romantically/sexually written as either binary concepts of "good" and "bad-touch", with the latter being often pointed out with an accusatory finger. personally i like reading bad-touch gunter for the lulz sometimes. also for the nuance given how sadly complex child abuse/grooming/pedophilia is in real life, and how it impacts the victim in so many ways beyond the obvious. and shocker - i like reading predatory-gunter sometimes even for cranking-the-hog-material! (predatory-gunter is kinda hot, man.) sometimes all of the above at the same time. i think all of these readings is just as applicable and interesting and needful as redemptive-gunter stories. (it's a very similar reason to why i fucking love possessed!gunter noncon what-if setups.)

and the above point doesn't even go into the nuance of can-you-even-have-redemption with the above if you want it. how would that work. how would that work in rev-verse vs conquest (different flavors of anankos possession going on in both. it's so much more complex than your usual grooming story if you frame it that way because his own agency is literally a question mark the entire time, which is endlessly fascinating to me with the horror potential as being a double victim in some ways. is this actually anankos' influence more than anything? how would everyone feel about that? especially anankos being corrin's bio-dad?)

going back to the quote itself there's even several other ways to interpret it that's not a crude (and imo annoying) distraction of moralizing.

like i always found it interesting that for a guy who deliberately self-censors 95% of the time, that he kinda blurts that out in a weak moment (which is already one interpretation, that it's semi accidental). why would he say that to corrin?

seriously, why would he?

i don't think he's trying to scare her off (like he does with some lines when he's a little insecure about his age).

what if he's genuinely fond of and loves corrin with a nuanced blend of fatherly love at the begining but yeah it did turn sexual towards the end (plus fatherly love) and either he doesn't want to exactly interrogate himself when that changed (because i personally think he holds a lot of understandable guilt over these feelings in general), or he isn't thinking about that at the moment and like. how the hell do you relay something like that without caveat-ing yourself to hell.

i think it's one of the few times here he's actually trying to be emotionally honest and vulnerable about how shits' complicated to him too. (and keep in mind he is not in general..... as emotionally aware as the tumblr crowd lol. he's an old man.)

there's a funny line in my head right now of "schrodinger's daddy dom" where society right now is a-okay with a daddy kink from the little's side but metatextually we've created a situation where it's impossible to create a three-dimensional daddy dom that is somehow free of sin and yet has honest to god sexual desires of his own especially in a messy situation like this.

especially in an evolving situation like this when it was very clear by the S-support he wasn't ever anticipating corrin to reciprocate his feelings, and he was dealing with his budding feelings by essentially just keeping it to himself. (canonically, he wanted to do the least-messy thing by not involving himself with corrin. it's only if corrin/you pursue him that he even gets this far.)

the extra funny thing:

all of this is dependent on the translation. culturally, through this whole game of telephone, the line itself may have some other JP specific connotations that we aren't aware of. christ what i wouldn't give to pay a fluent JP translator who didn't mind engaging with dead dove concepts to go through his support chain + these lines and give notes there.

....

and that's probably not even all of my thoughts but it's an essay as-is. :P

[ashtonisvibing]

Normalcy AU - Papa, I can't sleep...

Fandom: Jacksepticeye Egos

Alternate Universe?: Normalcy AU

Ship(s): None

Character(s): Henrik von Schneeplestein, Robbie the zombie

Warning(s): None

Author's Notes:

y'all ready for some cute father/child fluff? :}

another entry in the normalcy au, this one featuring henrik and robbie! in the au robbie is henrik's bio child (because dad henrik my beloved), so here's a lil blurb of henrik helping kiddo robbie fall back asleep.

also, if anyone who speaks german reads this, i apologize for any inaccuracies with the words used. the most i can do is google "german word/term for [x]" (i don't trust google translate) and hope the info i'm given is accurate as i don't know a beat of german (besides ja and leibling, and i don't even know if i spelled the latter right). there's barely any german used but if anything is incorrect or if there's a word/term that would work much better than what i've used, please let me know!

i also won't be trying to type henrik's accent like i've seen a lot of other people do, but he's still got it lol

pronouns check:

henrik - he/him

robbie - he/him

if you liked what you read, consider giving this a reblog, please! it'll let more people see my work!

[plain text: if you liked what you read, consider giving this a reblog, please! it'll let more people see my work!]

Full Story:

A cool spring breeze caused the curtains in Henrik's bedroom to flutter slightly while he laid in bed and read. The only light in the room came from the moon shining through the window and the bedside lamp. For once he didn't have to deal with a night shift at the hospital, and considering his son was sleeping, he was taking in the moment of calm to hopefully finish the book he had started a few days ago. The record player on the shelf across from him played one of his soft jazz records and filled the room with its enticing music, making the room the perfect reading environment. He missed having relaxing nights like this. It just barely made him regret becoming a doctor.

He had just gotten halfway through his book when suddenly there was soft knocking at his door, accompanied by sniffling. There was only one person that could be knocking on his door in general, let alone so late at night. He stuck his makeshift paper bookmark between the pages and got up to open the door. Sure enough his son, Robbie, was standing behind it, tears running down his cheeks and his purple bear stuffie held tightly in his arms. A gift from his oma when she learned how much he loved bears. Henrik was immediately filled with worry at the sight. He picked the child up gently and held him to himself as close as he could.

"Bärchen, what happened...?" The doctor spoke softly as he tried to wipe Robbie's tears away. The child responded with a soft, scared noise as he hid his face in his papa's shoulder. Seems he wouldn't be speaking until he calmed down. Henrik simply carried his son to the bed and gently laid him down on his chest once they were settled, wrapping the blanket around both of them. Despite the music still playing from the record player the doctor still started to sing. A soft lullaby his mama would sing when he was a child and couldn't sleep. His hand ran gentle circles into Robbie's back while he sniffled and occasionally let out soft hiccups.

But thankfully, by the time the doctor finished his lullaby the child had calmed down, now curled up in his papa's arms. Henrik didn't try to ask again about what had happened to not risk upsetting his son further. If Robbie wanted to say something he could. And if he didn't, then whatever happened would remain a mystery. Henrik already assumed it was simply just a nightmare of some sort, or maybe the child heard a noise that scared him. Any number of possibilities as to why a five year old would have gone to their parent for comfort.

"My nightlight turned off..." Robbie spoke quietly after a while. The doctor didn't say anything to let his son speak, simply just running his hand through the other's messy hair. Robbie was never the best at keeping his hair neat. "And all the scary monsters came out... They were gonna eat me..." The child nearly started crying again when Henrik held his son closer and left a kiss on his forehead, in an attempt to keep him calm and comforted.

"It's okay now, bärchen... I'll make sure that the monsters don't come and get you... And tomorrow I'll make sure to replace the light bulb in your nightlight so it works again, ja...? I'm sure the light bulb just ran out of juice..."

Robbie gave a little nod in response, snuggling more underneath the blanket. "Are you gonna pick me up from school tomorrow..?"

Henrik shook his head. "Nein, I have to work tomorrow.. But I can call Onkel Chase and Tante Stacy and see if they can pick you up.. You can stay with them for the night." It was very often for Robbie to go to his friends Chase and Stacy while he was at the hospital. It had basically become a second home for the child. Although as much as he liked seeing his onkel and tante, it was lonely not seeing his papa all of the time. But he'd never say anything. He knew it wasn't his papa's choice to be away so much, he had a lot of people to help. Like a superhero from the cartoons he watched.

Robbie gave another nod and rubbed his eye as he let out a big yawn, and Henrik couldn't help but chuckle over it. It was adorable how wide his son would yawn despite his small head. The doctor left another kiss on his son's head as he held Robbie closer.

"Now, you need to go back to sleep, bärchen.. I'm sure you don't want to be sleepy while you're in school.." He chuckled again as he got himself into a more comfortable position for both himself and Robbie, taking his glasses off to set them on the bedside table. He needed sleep as well. And with one final tiny nod Robbie soon drifted off to sleep, his bear stuffie held tight in his arms while snuggled close to his papa. Despite knowing he needed sleep Henrik continued to stay awake, if only to drag this moment out for as long as he could. A precious moment of getting to hold his son in his arms while the little child slept. If he could, the doctor would shape time around just being with his son. He hated the inconsistent working hours he had, never knowing whether he'd be working late into the night or early into the morning. It was moments like this that he wished he hadn't lost his wife when Robbie had been born. At the very least then he'd have one parent always with him.

But there was nothing to do now besides just being there for his son as much as he could with his limited free time. And hopefully one day that free time would grow more and more. Until then he just stretched this moment out for as long as he could, until sleep caught up to him what felt like far too quickly, and he joined his son in a quiet slumber. The record player's music still playing through the nightly air.

[wild-winder]

》Rules《

Hello.

I go by feral. they/them or she/her.

You might have heard of me. Or maybe not. Ive been around one side of this rpc or another for somewhere around 10 years.

I will turn asks and anons on and off again depending on my safety. if I forget to turn that back on before an ask meme let me know lmao

if you can make it through these rules without being scared off. maybe I will give you a chance. yes they are extremely long. consider it a filter. if you can't handle that. get out. you're already not worth me giving a chance.

I'm well fucking over 18. I am over 30 years old. Get off my lawn. Kids don't belong on Tumblr let alone anywhere near this RP blog. this is 18+ and you need to get the fuck out of here.

I will do icons or iconless threads. I primarily do ic-blogging but I will also do para. I don't always have the energy for threads but I'm willing to adapt.

I am nowhere near as acerbic as these rules make me sound. all of this is essentially fear-biting. but this community leaves me no fucking recourse other than to come in guns drawn. I will keep myself safe. unless you are already friends with me? I do not give a fuck about you. I am here for my safety. this community is too toxic to my well being for me to be anything else.

this blog will be NSFW. all of my blogs will be. though I plan to keep most overt erotic posting to side blogs there will be lurid stuff here and I likely will do sexual sunday stuff here. Get lost if you can't handle it. I'll try to tag such things #nsfw //

in general my tags are in the "#blank //" format but if you have a specific tag you use let me know!

this blog will also feature usage of weed and psychedelics, but no hard drugs.

I have extremely complex and very very harshly enforced rules. I have a lot of needs as a mun. I am not going to apologize for them, because this community at large makes zero effort to make any form of safe space for me to exist in. So instead I will make it myself. If you do not follow these rules you will be blocked for my own safety.

If you find yourself randomly blocked by me and you dont know me, you probably post some triggering shit the algorithm keeps shoving onto my dash so i had to block you to get rid of it. nothing against you. this site just sucks.

I am extremely selective. meaning im very choosy about who I interact with. who i follow. and who follows me. don't take it personal. i have extremely complex triggers that make Tumblr a wildly unsafe environment for me. I can only exist here with extremely harshly enforced boundaries and even then I see shit on here that triggers my intrusive thoughts every single fucking day.

I will only RP with mutuals. I will only RP with non mutuals on very select occasions. often I don't even look at my dash because I don't trust y'all to actually respect my needs and not start reblogging triggering shit because you "forgot." I am so incredibly used to having multiple days of violently intrusive thoughts because some friends "forgot."

and I am so incredibly tired.

I am fat and do have trauma around being fat how I depict big bodies with sexual overtones comes from a place of self acceptance and I will absolutely drag your ass through the dirt if you try and come for me with that. your experience with fatphobia is not mine. I will reclaim my own damn body how I fucking want to and I do not care about your opinion. My body positivity my rules.

I am aggressive and will bite as a mun, I’ve gotten too much bullshit to do otherwise. I have 6 years of experience moderating hyper leftist communities with over 10,000 members. I have heard every brain dead idpol argument in existence. If you try and go to war with me you won't win. Multiple individuals on this platform have tried. None have succeeded. Don't fucking bother. I will beat you.

there are people in this community I do not want to ever see again. if I see you interacting with them I will not start drama. I will not spread rumors. I will just unfollow or block you. that is all.

I do not respect anti vs proship rhetoric and i will not acknowledge or care about it. it's fucking stupid ass teenager culture war nonsense based on radfem terf beliefs worming their way into queer spaces. Get your own disgust-based reflexive politics out of my life because your bullshit is what empowered the current anti-trans wave that's destroying lives. get your worthless ramshackle house in order. you aren't virtue signalling by including it in your rules you're just an idiot.

freaks are absolutely welcome here. freaks and weirdos with every kind of depraved fucked up or silly cartoon deviantart kink imaginable. there might be some things I don't want to see but I will not judge you. yes even for that. yes even for that. I am an ex-furry. There are no kinks that will make me judge you. as long as it is between consenting adults then I don't care.

Please don't stalk my DMs, I am very selective socializing that much especially with people I don't know, its exhausting and puts me on the spot, besides, trying to get me to interact with you that way is a fast way to get me to not do that. Do not see me posting as a right to pester me via dm or on discord. That shit makes me so uncomfortable. I will bite.

this blog is multiverse & multiship. canon is extremely fluid and will change or be rewritten or retconned at any time.

I don’t do actual sex rp with anyone but close friends. do not try. I will block you and retcon any history you have with my characters as blog canon is arbitrary and fluid.

tag shit #feral don't look or #feral dont look

use this tag so I don't have to mind your 4000000 different personalized tagging systems. my safety is about me. not your blog aesthetics.

if you are making it through this. Good for you. I do not require you to automatically send a rules password. I know that can make people anxious. But. If you plan on trying to interact with me, then I need you to include the password "paws up" somewhere. that way I will know you have acknowledged these rules and will abide by them. otherwise I won't interact with you.

dont talk to me about religion and spirituality. yes yours too, even yours. deeply traumatized exvangelical. what beliefs i have are my own and im not interested in yours. that means any mention of demons or angels even in character form. that also counts for witchcraft and such that closely mimics irl spiritual practices. Stuff that's obviously fairy tale fantasy stuff doesn't count. Yes there is a difference between folktales and irl spiritual beliefs. Use your brain. if it's commonly accepted mythological fantasy fun material it's fine. if it is buried in the trappings of modern real world spiritual practices it is not fine.

a dnd wizard is gamey fun fantasy, your irl new age spiritualism is not the same thing. they are not interchangeable. one is made up nonsense for fun and games and the other is a real held real world belief. The latter I do not want to see. and if any game or media specifically draws from those real held real world beliefs. It is off limits for me. and if I see it I will block you.

This means I don't want to see hazbin hotel, this means I don't want to see helluva boss, this means I don't want to see dungeon meshi, this means I don't want to see your edgy demon oc blog. This means I don't want to see your castiel blog. If you get anywhere near me with any of it or reblog or post any of it untagged you will almost certainly be automatically blocked. unless I know you personally and can talk to you about it I am going to just cut you loose without a second thought.

I do not give a fuck about your stupid ass fandom wars over these properties. I need them off my dash because they're triggering. That is the only reason I care. If it involves demons or devils succubi or incubi or deadly sins or hell or angels or heaven or even a stupid pitchfork and demon horns halloween costume any of that horseshit get it the fuck away from me or I will start attacking. I will not be nice to you.

the actual trappings of church or priests or temples are not nearly as triggering as the more metaphysical aspects of religion.

I will not engage with any aspect of settings surrounding that kind of religiousity even in settings my characters are ostensibly in. consider those elements to be retconned even from canon settings I roleplay in. I do not care. No I don't care if yours don't "have a religious theme." if it's got western religious trappings I won't touch it and I will block you.

Japanese yokai don't count. we just call those demons because translators are stupid.

I have other triggers, but people are so incapable of following even this one that I almost don't feel like bothering to bring it up. I don't do alcohol or alcoholism. I don't really like slugs and snails. but they all pale in comparison to how difficult it is to exist in this community with the previously outlined restrictions.

if you made it all the way to the end. good for you. maybe I'll give you a chance. but don't take it personal if I'm not up for it. either way? I greatly appreciate you taking the time to read and understand this.