#i fear I've melted into a puddle of goo

[snow-blower]

There's this lovely older fellow I work with, he's in his late 30s I think. Anyway, he always makes me a cup of tea when I'm on till or doing online orders (he makes one for everyone I think). He's really sweet and always calls me treacle.

I had no idea what it meant and just didn't question it, bcz hey! He probably ain't calling me bitch in another language, so why question it? But he called me it again today and I was curious.

[cjlouwho]

Fuck It Friday!

I was tagged by @evanbi-ckley, and I've never done one of these before, but I decided to, well, fuck it.

Here's some unnamed BuckTommy + Tommy's Dad drama

He quickly pulled away from the kiss and unwrapped himself from Tommy's touch. “We have a visitor, Tommy,” Buck said when he was met with a confused face. “You do, I mean.” “I was wondering who's car was out front,” Tommy replied. “Figured the neighbors were having another party or something.” “No, um, it's...” Buck's voice trailed off. He could tell Charles was somewhere behind him now. Could see that Tommy's eyes trailed from looking at him to looking at his father. Whatever was left of the smile on his face disappeared, his skin paling. Part of Buck wished he could disappear. Just melt into the floor and turn into a puddle of goo. The other part of him had the urge to stand between the two men forever, making sure Tommy was protected from whatever pain his father had obviously caused him. Buck had never seen the look on Tommy's face before. It looked like fear and sadness, mixed with rage. “What are you doing here?” Tommy asked as Buck stepped to the side to get out of the way. “Well, hello to you too, TJ.” TJ? That was new. “Don't call me that. What are you doing here? How'd you find my house?”

[drarrily-we-row-along]

Hi you :) I just wanted to say that I've read your post about your coming out. Unfortunately, I don't have any good advice, but I just wanted to let you know that I hear you and, oh my god, do I feel you! I haven't officially come out but I've had thoughts about being ace myself for several years and the way you describe your feelings basically represents me 100 %. I don't have someone as your best friend in my life but the life you put into words actually sounds like something I could imagine with someone else, while I basically always thought that I would just stay alone. (Which I don't even mind that much, I like having my own space.. anyway) I do have my older sister with whom I travel and actually work together and just experience life with and I wouldn't trade this for anything else.

I'm rambling, sorry. I really just wanted you to know that you reach a lot of people, even if you don't think so or know it. I love your writing, I'm pretty sure I sent you messages before and I know that I've commented on your work here and on AO3 because your writing actually means a lot to me. The way you describe love, communication, and relationships (of any kind) is just incredibly beautiful to me. I always come back to your stories and get actually excited when I see that you've posted again.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is: thank you. For your writing but also (especially) for your post about being ace, feeling different, and coming out.

I wish you all the best and all the love! :)

Mira (all the way from Germany :D)

Hello lovely! Somehow I missed this lovely response to my recent post.

Thank you so much for dropping by to share part of your own story with me. I'm so, so honored to get to hear about part of your experience. Being alone is one of my biggest fears (I'm so glad it's not one of yours! Figuring out I was ace has been really scary and felt a little like the worst thing imaginable at first) I'm so happy that you have your sister to experience life with!

I'm just melting into a puddle of goo. Thank you so much. Writing has been such a gift to me, such a joy to get to do, and it's been such a blessing to get to share it with this lovely community. It's always my hope that I can put a little more love into the world and give people a safe space to land. <3

Wishing you the very best with much love! C

[mtnkat3]

Let's see how to write this...

[Stop being distracted by bones! Drowsy. Turkey.]

9.56pm. Diary.

When I think about bridges & you ..

I think about several different types on my journey to you .

That I am standing on one end of a damaged & dangerous broken down covered bridge. The road surface is warped, bent & twisted. The nails rusty & sticking up all over the place. It's a maze.. worthy of any treasure hunt but not to a temple of doom!

You .. are both light.. & standing in the light. Like my guardian Angels ..

Awe inspiring.

My feet moving slowly but steadily towards where you are patiently waiting on me.. your souls pulling me.. like a .. stars magnetic force & a bears honey pot rolled into one..

Then there's the wide open trestle bridge.. that one that makes me so nervous because there's no safety rails & the drop.. it's as impressive as the new river gorge.. & the grandfather mountain mile high swinging bridge..

those.. I need to feel you .. surrounding me.. pressed into me.. those.. as much as am fascinated & wanna experience them.. I know I can't alone. I just.. fills my tummy with butterflies.. & not the wonderful ones that you give me.. chewing my lips.

Ok. The next kind.. the sturdy kind.

The bridges made of concrete, metals, wood. Aesthetically pleasing but also very useful. Some are over small wee lil tricklin brooks, not meant for a rushing torrent of water. Not a flood. Others .. are built .. well.. to withstand floods.. they are attached.. rooted deeply..

like a strong, sturdy redwood forest.. or a mighty oak.. undisturbed for hundreds of years. Have withstood every storm, every flood. The rings are magnificent. The breadth.. so inspiring.. it's like.. the most tactile, earthly version of looking at the stars. And being able to touch makes me gasp..

then.. I feel like .. I'm stronger.. able to walk to you .. I feel .. surrounded.. by you .. by love.. it pulses power thru my veins.. keeps me remembering why I I won't let ever let go. It's feeding my soul.. even as I feel it's on a never ending loop. So many breathtaking images going thru my soul as I think on this.

But words are struggling.. maybe because I wanna leave them private, in my diary.. but I need to talk to you .. & that right now means exposing myself. Being vulnerable. Maybe.. the fear.. its founded in rejections & the pain. Maybe.. it's that I am capable of being so with you .. but showing the world my sensitive soul.. my marshmallow heart & soul.. it fills me with trepidation. But. I do it. For you ..

I just.. words fall me when I think about you .. but I keep trying.. my soul's the part that finds the words.. I hope I've explained a wee bit of how I feel about you .. about trees.. bridges.. the stars & all the universe you show me.. when you .. guide me.. I feel love.. I feel you .. & no matter how crazy that sounds to others.. I am flying around the moon at the feel of you lovin me..

Now I'm sleepy.. I've fought off the turkey to write this to you .. but I need to go to bed.. hopefully I can be.. naughty.. oh I so wanna be.. but with you .. hhmmm... squirming sleepily..

I love you .

& miss you so.. its shredding my spine like a cat-o'-nine tails.

Pleasee... touch me.. crave the scent of me.. the way I move.. crave.. my vibe.. who I am. The woman God Created beside you .. because I always want your neck kisses.. they melt me.. into a puddle of kat goo at your feet..

Please.. let's make soul love in our dreams..

I work. I await. On my cliffside. For you .. I'll wait for eternity. Because I believe. But I think it's happening soon.. & I am oh so ever hungry... you .

~True love never dies & true love always waits.~

Your fighting sleep kat.

Your complex quirky warrior queen daughter.

~Tijgeress kat Phoenix. ✝️🌺🐾🐯

🥰😍😘😌🤓⚓🙏🙇‍♀️⛓

⌚💡⚡🌠🗝🔱⚜💝🐻🦌🧩♠️♾🎯🌎🧭🕯

Tu.11.29.2022 12.11am est.

Gifs & transfer. 12.52am.