#i dunno how to word this well because if i see one more post thats like

[basilpaste]

ive been trying very hard to formulate a way to say this that doesnt make me sound like an asshole but honestly ive like. given up.

youre gonna drive yourselves fucking nuts with all the doom posting. and all the "its gonna be okay, you have to live" posting isnt any less doom posting. its all the same song to a different tune.

its shitty and terrible and youre allowed to feel shitty and terrible. but its not like. gonna change because you feel shitty about it. and constantly thinking about how shitty you feel about it is just gonna make you feel worse.

go like. eat a snack or something. play a game you like. i dunno. its shitty! but dont spend your time catastrophizing. drink some fuckin water or whatever other cheesy bullshit keeps you occupied while you process.

[moonshynecybin]

do you have any motogp fic recs?

yeah sure man. im gonna keep it simple (ao3 only) because i am a capricious bookmarker and refuse to wade through the weeds of tumblr fic as im not a natural tagger. no order just vibes. all of these i love and reread !

cant change that, cant change you by kingsquarding

Marc at the ranch for the (second) first time.

this fic is the platonic ideal of marc and vale post reconciliation being TOGETHER and at the RANCH and trying to make it WORK but they are also. still being a little messed up. themes include: guilt. injury. marc trying to get vale to stop treating him like glass and FUCK HIM already because he doesnt want to admit that their relationship/his body has changed since he was twenty. delicious.

Che Spettacolo! by serve_cunt

“What do you think,” Vale says, and leans against the doorframe. “Will he come?” Uccio stays silent. Of course he will come, he wants to say. In what world does he stay away? In what world can he resist?

sending uccio to the cuck chair. outside POV rosquez always hits for me becuase they match each other's freak in so many ways its fun to see what antics they engage in as obsevered by someone more normal. in this case. uccio. also helps get around vale's shit ass communication because its him through the eyes of someone who KNOWS that vale is being WEIRD. even if marc doesnt. fun and SEXY. academic au by the same author ALSO slays

of crashing and burning (and falling for you) by Anonymous

It has always been Marc and Valentino, Valentino and Marc. Two rivals inseparable on- and off-track throughout their careers, their story so closely intertwined they might as well have been the same person, dominating their beloved sport between the two of them. Then Marc breaks his arm, Vale loses their championship, and they are left trying to pick up the pieces. AKA a rosquez same age AU.

someone wrote out. elle and i's same age au. and it was so perfect i legit struggle to answer asks about this au now because im just like. its in the AU !!! its all here !!! really nails vale in this specific scenario imo... all the love and resentment and self-imposed walls and. my favorite of all. the exact way these guys talk in press conferences. like their exact diction. hits the spot beautifulperfect

arms out like an angel by yekoc

“Does Marc still work here?” he asks. He can’t think of the word for performing. “I dunno, man,” the guy says. “Sorry, I’m new.” Vale blinks at him. “Find out,” he says, and then, annoyed at himself for the impatience, “if you can. I came a long way.”

the efficiency of word choice in terms of characterization in this one really moves me... every line has implications !!! sexy ones even !!! and theres so much baseline CHEMISTRY and inability to really STAY AWAY from each other but also. a tense little undercurrent of slight misunderstanding and hurt that makes it stand out... i also just love fics where marc pushes back just a lil and vale has to like. figure out what to do with that. in a horny way. yekoc's bezzcele also goes crazy if you wanna think about nipple piercings as much as i do

All I Wanted by agnst-crrnt

The first time it happens is just after Marc’s 10th birthday. He’s about to complain to his parents about how Álex always finishes the milk and then puts it back into the fridge, when the faces of his parents’ blur in front of him. Marc closes his eyes, trying to make it better and grabs onto the edge of the table. He can hear his mama ask him if he’s okay, before everything stops. or Rosquez Time Travel Au, where Marc randomly gets teleported through time, always ending up somewhere around Vale

hey thats my friend. rosquez time travel au as ive said my favorite thing to think about maybe EVER !!! really love the strict marc POV on this one and how you REALLY see the. youre in love so you go. and his just. his ceaseless romanticism and optimism wrt to vale and their relationship that fits this fic concept SO well. guest appearances from pedrenzo as well yayyyyy

i give into the fall series by lestelledreams

Her and Pol were good; they did win a gold at Junior Worlds after all, and that’s not something anyone can just go out there and do. But her and Valentino – they could become great. Mar’s never been more sure of anything in her life. or, The first year of Mar's and Vale's partnership.

genderbend figure skating au where marc gets to have all his weird injury complexes explored AND it gets slutty AND we get to see his freak ass ambition. imagine if motogp was a pairs sport (like actually not just in a fake way) and marc had the option of pairing up with vale. imagine how crazy he would go trying to make that happen adfhdflk

a hundred ninety-nine degrees by hardlythewiser (sequinedfairy)

“You should fuck me again,” Bez says. It trips out, all his defenses worn down by the long, annoying day of meetings, by the feeling of Cele above him, pressing him down into the couch, by Cele’s bright clear gaze. Above him, Cele doesn’t smile with his whole face, scrunching up his eyes, like he did the first time Bez asked. He doesn’t smile at all, just keeps looking at Bez. “Really?” he asks. “I didn’t know – did you like it, last time?”

cele tops lets GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. some fics just. have an ability to pierce directly towards what actually and precisely makes a pairing or a situation or a dynamic SEXY, while also revealing a new facet of said dynamic that i've never thought about in depth before. this is one of those. fuck him!!! make him cry !!!! perfect !!!

i was having a sweet fix of a daydream of a boy (whose reality i knew was hopeless to be had) by babynflames

In Motegi 2005, Hiroshi Aoyama wins his first race during his home GP, Dani Pedrosa gets second while hiding a fractured humerus and Jorge Lorenzo is handed a one race ban for riding in a irresponsible manner after nearly colliding with Dani and causing de Angelis to abandon the race, leaving the third position to Casey Stoner. The haircutting is incidental.

dyke PEDRENZO. fic that is fun and funny and filled to the BRIM with the kind of homoerotic tension you can only have between two teenage dykes in direct competition who dont even know theyre horny about each other except they REALLY kind of do. also. the best sports rpf to me always engages with a sport on a sociological level... also just love the writing style on this. direct and avoidant at the same time. very dani in sexuality crisis to me aljfdhl

[daisuke-therealest]

opinion of your crew mates?

ooc: (oc accounts will be under cut)

Good question!! Super long post btw-

curly: he's the best!! well, not the best in general but the best captain (i assume at least)!!! He's always super like, motivational and kind to us all and its honestly really helpful when you're having a bad day!! And I like his accent, no idea where its from, somewhere British but dunno which- Oh and I like teaching him the "gen z lingo" even if he doesn't really get it, like that time if he asked me if anya thinks I'm sigma- (mod: true story)

swansea: okay so, swansea is super strict and stuff but, dude, he's like the BEST teacher ever!! i feel like I've learnt more from him then i have in any random tutor session, even if i still mess up a lot.. Sometimes it's a little awkward, if he's angry at me or whatever but he never lets me actually stay upset over anything!! he secretly cares a lot, i know it!

anya: ANYA!!!! she's like, my bestest friend, im not even talking just on the tulpar, like out of all the people I've known ever she's the one i feel the most, uh, normal with? like myself? eh, dunno how to word it but she's so awesome!!! she still tells me off when i do something stupid and get myself hurt, but it usually ends in us joking and laughing together :D And she loves seeing my drawings!! You know, she actually has a few of them put up in the medical room!!! (�� ⁠/⁠^⁠ω⁠^⁠)⁠/⁠♪⁠♪

jimmy: Jimmy's kindaaaa confusing? he's quite quiet, and I know cap gets along with him quite well but he doesn't really talk a lot to anyone besides him.. I don't think he's that bad tho! I mean, if he talked more and we got along then im sure I'd be able to be his friend!! Some people are just a little shy!!

Oc accounts:

bailey @baileythebean : BAILEY!!!! He's so so so so so amazingggg and awesome (⁠ʃ⁠ƪ⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠）He's my boyfriend!!! Though im not quite sure we should let cap find out.. im pretty sure thats like, against policy- eh it'll be fine!!! He's so amazing, and sweet too!! i love his shark plushy, razor, and he's like SO adorable and every time I see him its like, okay might get a little sappy, but its like i fall in love all over again ⁄⁠(⁠⁄⁠ ⁠⁄⁠•⁠⁄⁠-⁠⁄⁠•⁠⁄⁠ ⁠⁄⁠)⁠⁄!!!! Definitely my favourite crew member hehe!!

mac @tulparsbotanist : Cap's kid!!! They're so fun, and I love the memes they send me! They're another one of the people im closest to up here, and im glad!!! I love hanging out in the greenhouse with them, all the plants are so fun to look at, I tried to grow a daisy for them but turns out im not the best at picking out seeds because, dude, I don't think I grew a daisy...... (mod: i have a plant at my mum's house to act this out later and I can't wait)

peyton @the-starry-peyton : She's quite quiet, but in a less ominous way than Jimmy, I know she LOVES like, astrology is it? stars and shit? which makes sense seeing as her job is to literally collect information and study the stars and planets we pass- I know shes close with Lottie (mod: next one) our janitor, who's even quieter- hey there are a lot of quiet people on this ship, or am I just too loud?-

lottie @miss-ainsworth-speaking : our janitor!!!! she's super duper quiet, i dunno much about her, but I know she's been working here for like 2 years? she doesn't say much, but i always see her whispering with Peyton in the halls, or occasionally talking with anya, so I think they're a little close too!!! she reminds me of anya actually, well before i got to know her, they're both a little secretive and quiet..

RADIO!! 📻: sorry I've not actually tagged them, they're an anon but like, they're on the ship! they just stay in their office thingy all the time, we talk over the speakers on the wall!!! i aaaaaaallways say this, but they make me think of Radio from Radio Silence, which is SUPER COOL!!! and i love talking over the speakers, it makes me think of those spy movies where they gotta be all secretive and stuff-

donella : I CAN'T REMEMBER HER TAG D: but anyways- donella!!! they're so cool, and super good at drawing! theres this little clown drawing she did that's SUPER CUTE and this girl from an anime, precure something, i dunno but it was so cool!! and they're so nice, the stuff they say honestly makes my day sometimes and I don't think they even know it!!

Ooc: please lmk if I've missed anyone who's supposed to be like, in this universe, I know there's at least one person but i genuinely cannot remember.. i know they're Bailey's friend and that's about it :<

[cconfusedkat]

(shaking hands, functioning on three iced coffees, not beta read we just die) (LIL BRO TREATING THIS LIKE AO3Anyways yeah i did not read anything i typed here a second time so my wording might Suck Major Kuss)

Hey chat! sorry my holiday depression unfortunately kicked in, i had a ,, relatively decent Eid (cuz i dont celebrate christmas) ...? so i hope everyone had a relatively better holiday than i did… 💦

My friends often tell me i look like my art and i kinda see it. Hooray! Meeting the artist! Except i took matters into my own hands of making my own collage because I Do Not Have Enough Storage Space For Any Other Editing App

Additional shitpost ❤️ the art I've been most proud of are not actually in here, really! I'm mainly proud of the fanart i made for the few smiling critters AU's aaaall the way back feb-march but. I guess the stuff i liked the most i did this year was probably for the one who wilts? Im trying to think of stuff earlier than that. I noticed i definitely had an improvement in art, and i learned i do have a preference of drawing certain ways now too lmao- the fun of art! I hope to improve more in 2025 :-)

Herm,, all jokes aside, im glad people like my art...?? I am not a very Secure artist myself (already taking me five minutes to type that out and consider myself as an artist) so im SHOCKED when people Actually like my things. My doodles. The sometimes rare occasion of real art i put out there. Like! Wow! Thats crazy

Id have to say the same for youtube- im currently at 456 subscribers 🥺❤️ that is huge to me,, i wouldnt have expected me posting for the first time in years on youtube would result to me getting this many subscribers? ? .???

Im very, VERY thankful for the people ive met this year through fandom and generally. Unfortunately—for the past few months—Ive hit a really low stump in my mental health that limits me from talking to people without getting super drained, even on social media i kinda struggle with being active again. I am thankful for the people that continue to stick around and know im the way that i am,, one day ill be mentally stronger and everyone is gonna see my growth as soon as i can ,, Actually leave my own home and hopefully start a new. I didnt really consider that until one of my friends shared its experiences with me and i GENUINELY realized i can run away and get better one day,, there is a light at the end of the tunnel,, there IS,, but not now. Not today. Not in a few months. Itll take me years to heal but 2025 and ongoing years as i get more freedom to do so,,

UHHHH UHHH. ASIDE FROM CHEESY RANTING OF HAVING HOPES FOR THE FUTURE, YAPYAPYAP- i got a drawing tablet (again another thing my friend inspired me for- technically two major things in a row it inspired me for- hope in the future and drawing BWAHAHA-) and uhhh. HmMMOOHHH YEAH I REUNITED MY MEOWMEOWS! HOORA🎊🎊🎊🎊

my 2025 goals are not just improvement in art,, but in hopes of getting a full time job (since my last full time UMM. did NOT work out well! How am i gonna learn to pay my taxes on my own dawg,) and trying to get a place of my own since i missed out on that two years ago (or one? One year ago? I DUNNO..!!!!) , therapy and trying to heal better compared to my terrible stumps of 2022-2024,, i dunno what else but. Maybe working on my social skills at some point 🗿🗿 a far fetched goal is moving out of state completely and also going on testosterone but that is farrrr from now </33

Thank you lot for following and keeping up with my goofiness i gen did not think an animanga nerd with a passion of indie and mascot horror games could reach 510 followers within one year HELPPP thats crazy

On less serious goals though i hope on watching more animes than reading manga in 2025 BWAHAHAGAHSAJD i read manga more and anime is Extremely Rare for me to watch but both jjk and Beastars have all ive been watching as of recent lol- trust i will be such a geek (girl Please that is NAWT something to look forward to) (YES IT IS. HAVE YOU NO WHIMSY?)

[karolldr1]

u draw them a lot and seem to have many thoughts on them and i would like to hear them- what is marx and marx soul's relationship to eachother? is marx soul himself from an alternate universe? a ghost? past memory?

thank u for your time. also your color choices are so pretty, do you have any tips on how you choose them. like is it a specific layer setting or just instinctive

Oh, now this post is LONG, i will add the "read more" if you wanna read abt my Marx Soul interp. and the way i manipulate colors, read down below

[Interpretation might change over time]

Oh so this is quite the golden question, and im very happy to answer this one

Marx Soul is an anomaly, more specifically, a timeline anomaly, he was SUPPOSED to die, but he kiiind of ended up creating another timeline that wasnt supposed to exist by merely the fact that he barely survived, which made the timeline by itself an anomaly in which he managed to escape (i will try to create a 'how' later, i didnt think about that ^^")

But of course, his plans still dont go like he wants so, and ends up in the timeline we know, not exactly without a physical body, more like in the verge of nonexistence, similar to a ghost except that if he doesnt find someone to possess he literally just disappears and never comes back, he needs to BELONG to the main timeline to continue his existence, due to him being from a timeline that was supposed to dissappear

Thats when he finds Marx (well, more like his silhouette, Marx Soul's biggest inconvenience is him being kinda blind, he sees nothing except the silhouette of people [This is because of the explosion, being VERY bright, and Nova, which makes him see the silhouettes])

Oh, at first, after "possesing" Marx, he wanted to TORMENT him, due to the envy of Marx's timeline going better than his, because being mad at himself for failing the plan of getting his wish AND because, since Marx Soul DESPISES Kirby, he can't get how Marx can stand him and be FRIENDS with him, this timeline is just too alien for Marx Soul

Initially Marx didnt like Marx Soul either, he didnt understand what is he nor how is he with him tormenting him every second, he literally would want to remove him and throw him out the window! but he cant because Marx Soul starts off as someone intangible!

Eventually they do get close to eachother due to the fact that they have no choice, Marx Soul tends to be a bit more childish but WAY more aggressive than Marx, he also gives Marx influence for "" prankless harms""" (in other words, getting others hurt for the sake of mischief), Marx doesnt really ignore him, but modifies the pranks so they dont harm THAT much

So yea, thats basically it ^^"

About the colors...

When it comes to choosing colors, its mostly about playing with the color wheel, remember those images that say many color combinations with the color wheel?

Yea, i do use them, more specifically, Analogous for shading and Complementary or Triadic for highlights (but sometimes analogous too)

When it comes to manipulating shading, i barely desaturate colors (aka doing this)

The only times where i use it, its in the transition between red and pink, due to the shading not being dark enough

Also, to make the shading more smooth, i add some transition, i dunno how to explain it correctly, but you can see it in this drawing, especially in the eyes

And overall, have fun messing with the colors, thats the most important part ^^

[future-boi]

Get To Know Me Tag Game!

Thanks to @mythical-bookworm and @alex-a-fans for tagging me.

tbh this is just a song rec list LMAO [easier to open in a browser fyi]

1) Spell your name in songs

Y'all get two for the price of one cuz I couldn't decide if I wanted to go with all non-English songs or not.

The non-English songs are labeled with 🧋 in case you wanna avoid 🤪

Warning: Most of the songs in english have swear words so... just in case u got kids or ur strict parents around LMAO.

⚡️ F: Fighter Not a Lover

aro/ace people gonna love that shit ^ + no swear words

alt: fml u fucked me up

⚡️ U: URARA🧋

It translates to 'Oo-la-la', which I now realize is the magazine Biff was carrying around in the second movie... this was unintentional and the meaning of the song is very wholesome, trust me

alt: Upside Down

⚡️ T: this was a demo for this one song...

That one's like 50% f-bombs ^ i love it

alt: Toxic but its NOT Brittany, B*tch 💅

The most aggressive entry on this list

⚡️ U: Up Up and Away

The only f-bomb is in the second verse

alt: Unmei no Roulette Mawashite 🧋

'unmei' means 'destiny' so you know I had to include it

⚡️ R: Raining in Manila (half 🧋)

Couple of dudes just vibin' out in the studio, what's not to love?

alt: RAHHHH

^im convinced this is what suburbanites see in their nightmares

⚡️ E: Electricity (half 🧋)

alt: Extensyon

Both make up the most WHOLESOME entry in this

⚡️ -(hyphen): Hatid Sundo 🧋

Baby. Baby boi. Baby. vibes ^

alt: Hell to Sell

EVIL. vibes ^

🚫🧢 I have a problem with tonal whiplash. Did I cheat and use the hyphen to include the most wholesome and cute song right before pulling out the lowkey most scandalous song in the list? YES.

Just realized it doesn't work as well if you can't understand it, but trust me. I mean just listening to its vibes is enough 😩

⚡️ B: Balik Sa Umpisa 🧋

Any song that samples/remixes 'Stand By Me' is a W in my book.

alt: Bodybag

I'm just self-reporting at this point.

Ok the rest are very wholesome songs I swear

⚡️ O: Oretachi Rookies 🧋

alt: Oh, Imagine That

ok this one's tied for most wholesome in the list

⚡️ I: I/Me/Myself

gnc/nb people gonna love this shit ^

alt: I Really Like You

that was a struggle, R is the top pick to check out imo. E, O and I are the wholesome ones with no swear words if u care.

2) Why did you choose your URL?

Its based. ..off the song in the musical. I got back into the fandom because of the musical so I owe it that much. 'boi' sounds more gender-neutral than 'boy'

3) What is your middle name?

That's a secret!

4) If you could be any mythical creature, what would you be?

Shapeshifter.

5) Favorite color?

Purple. Lavender/Periwinkle specifically.

6) Song you love right now?

What? 🧋 The amount of crackhead energy, but genuine emotion... AND AESTHETIC. it was literally made for me LMAO Ken is so aggro but hes singing about not littering. like why is he so intimidating-- but i support the eco-friendly king. but fr the song is about waving ur flag with pride??? PRIDE???? and they look androgynous asf??? whats not to love

7) Top four fandoms? (Current Fandoms?)

Back to the Future

That's it

jk uhhh, Invincible

Thats it, dont wanna get into past fandoms rn

8) Tag nine people

mf u think i know 9 people??

im playin, lemme tag some cool people... not that u have to do this, i just wanted to bother u 🤪 but feel free to do it, i wanna hear other music 🥺🥺🥺

⚡️ @maxintime LOVE UR ART STYLE. BEEN TOO SHY TO BOTHER U THO 😭

⚡️ @jowritesfanfiction my inspo, my density, ILY. Im never shy bout bothering u in my posts HAVE U GOTTEN THE RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST ME YET 🤪🤪😭😭😭 ive tagged this mf in every other post istg

⚡️ @moth-makay ur great frfr 😭😭 all the hugs. r u gonna post more art??? cuz u shouuuld 🥺

⚡️ @bttf-dork ur name and pfp give comfy vibes??? its very endearing. dunno how to describe it, but i like seeing u in my notifs 🥰 bUT UR ART DOHHH. immaculate. underrated.

⚡️ @pepsifox88 i hope u continue to cook ✨ everyone go and GIVE THEM SUPPORT, I AM NO LONGER ASKING

and to the rest of u, thank u for liking a bunch of my work, whenever i see long lists of likes like that, or if i see ur name often 'nuff, i always notice 😇, i never know how to say thank you!!

@leftoverspagehhti

@karorurodriguez

@epikprinc

@mapleflavedpepperoni

@xmaster3000

@jayisnotdrawing

@jackofthecards

@ectojester

@cat0marble

Didn't include everyone, but just know that i noticed you!!! 💝

watch me get reported for harassment by all these people 😂

[the-whispers-of-death]

"reader doesn't follow boxer!stone into the locker rooms afterwards" my heart... ive just woken up and see that how dare you hurt me at 6am in my own home

so so so giddy over all of that tho and it raises a TON of questions as well. like, for example, would they have even been friends before that? or are they just workplace crushes?? i very clearly see reader now just avoiding any public appearances for a WHILE. bro probably cant open social media w/o being blasted w posts about it. maybe hes rejecting press interviews, guest appearances on shows, all that, because all they'd probably talk about is a) the kiss b) his sexuality, which i would presume was proooobably a well kept secret until that moment. hm.

but what does stone do. like. how does one react to that sort of impulsive decision. i doubt either of them *regret* it, but maybe can agree there was a better time and place for all of that

oh god imagine the talk between them both that goes down after this. HORRID. its a very very delicate thing to handle and they both know it

or maybe utterly worst case scenario, reader quits working with him. too much public attention over such a minor thing. sure the job probably pays well but is it realky worth the 'scandal' that the public makes it out to be? i know i would definetly become a damn hermit if this happened.

or maybe he enjoys and revels in the attention. "yeah *i* got to kiss him in front of all of you. thats *my* man, hell yeah !!!!! maybe he uses this sudden exposure to his advantage. i mean, its like a sales strat they *could* experiment with. or not. i dunno

~ love, a very much so half-awake rusty

CW: Angst

"Are you finally done ignoring me?" Stone asked, appearing beside you before you could scurry away from him like you've been doing for the past few days. He crossed his burly arms against his chest. "We need to talk."

You swallowed down the lump in your throat, nodding. "We do need to talk, about the kiss," you replied, sounding nervous. You weren't a nervous guy, usually, but you also weren't the type of man to kiss his best boxer. "Look, the kiss was because of the adrenaline, it meant nothing."

Stone held back his frown, feeling the hurt settle into his chest at the way you so easily dismissed the kiss he had initiated. "What?" He couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"It was nothing, Stone," you insisted. It had to be nothing, he was your best boxer. You couldn't date him and risk losing your best boxer in case the relationship failed. "The kiss was due to the high of the moment. It's not going to change anything."

"I like you," Stone blurted out, his voice softer than usual. He stepped closer, towering over you like always. He looked so hopeful that you felt the same way. "I can't sleep without imagining you beside me, I ache for you. It was not nothing to me. I meant all of the emotions I poured into that kiss. You can't say you don't feel the same way too."

You did feel the same way too, you did. But the professional in you, the one who loved having a star boxer, pushed down your feelings. You couldn't let this get out of control like it had that fated night.

He'd get over it, you thought to yourself, even if this was going to hurt him.

Your eyes narrowed. "No, Stone. I don't feel the same." The lie felt bitter on your tongue, but you pushed through the discomfort. "You're nothing more than my prized boxer to me. You always will be. You're just a boxer."

Stone took a step back from you, physically recoiling from the wave of hurt that hit him like a ton of bricks. His brown eyes kept searching your face for a hint of you lying, but you had schooled your expression too well.

He couldn't tell you were lying. And that fact made his expression shut down, turning cold and stoic like always.

"Of course," he murmured, his voice so cold like always. "I'm going to go wash up."

With those words, he turned on his heel and walked to the locker room. He ensured no one else was in the locker room before he let a sob tear from his throat, pressing his back against the wall and sliding down to crumple onto the ground.

Stupid, he told himself, I was stupid for thinking anyone would love me.

Reblogs are welcomed & appreciated! Asks are open, feel free to pop in and talk or request something! (SFW requests only, please and thank you)

[nothingtoseeherethankyou]

Updated Intro

Now that im sober and not focused on holding anything, lets take this from the top! hi, you can just call me D. this is my Kink blog. I made it to follow some Omo artists from ao3, but this blog is gonna be alot more then just that. This blog was made to help me accept some parts of myself ive kept hidden for the majority of my teen/adult life. Im 20yo, about to be 21 in 2025.

Minors get the fuck off my page. you know yall aint suposed to be here. now scram before i get the broom. anyone who dosnt have an age in their boi or has a minor age will be blocked. end of story.

Some things about me: Im new to this side of me and this side of tumblr, so i know fuck all about terminology. My pronouns are They/he/it, im trans FTM, NB Masc presenting, im demisexual, the chances of me wanting to do sex stuff off the bat is very very low unless its in a ROLEPLAY SETTING with CHARACTERS, who ARNT ME or YOU. I have more of an intrest of being controlled then doing the controlling. being teased about things is fine, especialy if you describe something youd think my FC would do, PLEASE do that- being teased and lightly humiliated is fun. Im still exploring stuff so if i find something thats a hard NO i will say so and you best respect it. i am not afraide to block someone. I am an artist! i like to draw stuff but likely wont post alot because i have a recognizable style and i dont want this to be connected back to my main blog. My safe word is Pineapple if that matters. I am a masochist as far as im awhere, again im exploring here. My list of known kinks: Dom/Sub dynamics Light BDSM (being handcuffed to a head board is all ive had experiance with but being tied up sounds fun too) Choaking is a YES Leash and collars/petpl4y Omo Heat (not, the whole of A/B/O just the heat part :p) Teasing/Orgasm delay/denial Being called a good girl (that one is a very rare instance tho) Pet names are always good (pup, puppy, kitten, sweetheart, doll) Biting is yes (vampires make me FERAL) I dunno how many of these fall under others but might as well be as crystal fucking clear as i can. List of Kinks im willing to explore: Knife play Flame play Wax play This one is pretty recent, like as of the day im posting this but, intoxication? letting someone intoxicate me and slowly turn me on sounds, fucking exquisite. Maaaaaybe consensual non-con but, not in a r4py way. Stuff you will never see on my blog for as long as im running it: Scat, Incest, pedophilia, anything to do with sexualized Age play, bestiality, torture, hard gore, necrophilia, non con, (consentual noncon is a hard maybe), rape, race play. will add more to this if it comes up. Some more casual stuff about me: I have a dog i love plushies i can and do love being soft and cuddly im not alwase just a kinky slut. if we get really close i can link you to my main blog where you can see that side of me more clearly :D

[intertexts]

HELLOOOO I COME BEARING GIFTS

EPISODE 11 TRIVIA:

- ashe being there surprised dakota so much it broke him somewhat out of his bad mood! in grizzlys words "if he wouldnt have met ashe right then, dakota would have been so much more angry and miserable at the beginning of this episode. he mightve just straight up left. got up and walked away."

- he didnt want to talk to william or vyncent at all, so ashe being there (however unwillingly) as a third party made things easier and almost softened the blow of vyncent yelling at him in the moment

- "why did i dream about william and vyncent being villains in the beginnign and killing summer" ".... i dunno" *cue entire party suspicious WHAT DOES THAT MEAN*

- "i dont trust your characters now" "you have ONE bad dream and our campaign turns into a game of among us"

- william: "hey ashe do you want to run away and write poetry with me?" emo/goth kid solidarity

- this is yakko's (ashes player) first time ever playing a ttrpg !!! fucking wild!! he feels like he needs more practice describing things

- FUN CHARACTER FACTS. I LOVE THESE MORE THAN ANYTHING. BIZLY ASKED EACH OF THEM WHAT KINDS OF MUSIC THEIR CHARACTERS WOULD LISTEN TO.

dakota: breakbeat, old school rap, 90s punk rock. also for shows he would watch it was "cartoons like atla, tmnt and codename kids next door"

william: "indie rock. and on a bad day, evanescence" (god hes just like me fr)

vyncent: "my character doesnt know what music is"

ashe: MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE . also apparently yakko made an ashe winters playlist on spotify and thats actually what they were playing in the episode. i have not found this yet and i desperately want to

- for the spirit world, bizly asked charlie to find him just random pieces of music that he could envision places for and thats how they came up with carnival of souls! there are a handful more places like that that youll see eventually :]

- yakko: "im glad i was able to bring wavelengths threat level down an entire tier just by calling him mark"

- charlie wants william and ashe to hang out in character more because theyre so similar and he thinks they would have a lot to bond over! i love this

- theyre all really excited that they get to go to the spirit world together and it wasnt just an excuse to split the party because they dont want to do that :] (<< i just rlly like this energy)

- grizzly is specifically playing dakota as "not being able to process emotions very well"

ALSO!!!!!!! i dojt know what site or whatever youre using to watch/listen so im hoping they have this on there BUT. the tide backstory oneshot was posted between episodes 12 and 13 so if u wanted to listen to that one now would be a good time !!! its called The Elementals :]

HIII YAYAYAYAYYY!!!! ohh fuck yes a little bowl of seeds for me :333

the dakota & ashe stuff is so goodddd u can rlly tell. it's like yeah you cant be mad and miserable and sulky in front of someone u don't know!! & ashe is just.... so unbothered... i loaf him... he truly did bring the threat level down so fast. went from terrifying supervillain in charge of the Evil Facility to an exhausted pissed off single dad in 1 minute.

+ALL THE MUSIC STUFF IS SO GOOD..... ITS SO GOOD. yelling. vyncent is going 2 end up having the weirdest music taste from hanging out with them. augh... awesome trivia thabk. the energy they have is so fun always....

[basofy]

ON UR LATEST POST I HATED THAT ENDING SO MUCH LOL they were both so out of character?? i do like the idea of buddy verbally breaking buzzo down but idk they did it so badly it didnt feel like the two of them at all especially him being all GRR YOU BITCH like eben if thats just the joy getting to him IDK it just. felt so :/ to me SORRY FOR THE LONG ASK

oh hi lolll dw about the ask i like getting asks(as long as i can think of a reply)

yeah much like with other stuff in the definitive i liked some of the concepts in the dialogue/ending but not the execution, as some people have already said it the stuff buddy tells buzzo feels more like the game is trying to make up for the fans's mistakes when misinterpreting lisa instead of trying to work through the mistakes it had made with the characters in the past, much like buddy's words about brad later on don't feel like it's her talking but it's instead austin talking agshgahgf i think all this happens because joyful continues failing to fully put itself on buddy's shoes so she becomes hard to write she barely even has a personality and it's sad, i did like some of the new stuff but the way it was set up and concluded is kinda goofy

i was surprised to see that the definitive edition managed to expand lisa's character nicely (save for that one implication buzzo made about hearing her voice and blah blah) but it didn't do the same for buddy as much as it tried. i think the stuff buddy says is especially weird because it all feels like conclusions we didn't see her reaching we didnt get to see the process and some of the stuff feels unfair to her as well, and making buzzo lame feels like a desperate attempt to get people to understand this guy isnt good he's just saying shit!!!! and it's funny some fans still dont get it lmao, i feel like it tried so much to make buzzo look bad and it didn't do it in the way it could've done it?? buddy could've had beef with him about how much he mistreated her, they dont even talk about the nipple thing even though it was aknowledged in the dream segment, also i would've preffered if buddy learned about lisa through buzzo instead of through weird ghost stuff but i'm wondering if she really knows at all?? i admit i cant be too mad cuz i understand that making joyful better would require rewriting soooo much stuff which was maybe not possible i dunno

i think austin understood that lisa needed more told about her as a human being rather than a haunting memory and that was rly nice to see yet it failed to understand that buddy's issues is that the story doesnt feel like it's about her that much, it tries to solve so much stuff for everyone that buddy is left with so little

[hokiis-writing-dump]

Genshin Team Sleeping Trend, but I write about it instead.

So I’m back from a long time of no writing at all, and there’s no real reason for my absence besides me burning out. I stopped playing Genshin for a while and didn’t really keep in touch with any content for it either. Don’t expect this to be really all that accurate with storyline (because I did sorta not pay too much attention during Sumeru’s story, I got tired of how long it was) but it’s taking place after the most recent lantern rite. I can’t guarantee I’ll stay consistent with a schedule, so honestly, expect more of me posting at random when I’m in the mood, lol.

Characters in my team: Aether, Kazuha, Albedo and Heizou

Content Includes: Maybe ooc characters bc I haven't written for genshin in a long time, no paimon bc idk how to write for her, Scaramouche/Wander mentioned to be in the teapot but not with the others, teapot layout is the one thats like...water and islands. forgot what its called.

Extra Headcanons:

They're kinda relevant for this, but both Traveler(Aether in this case) and Wanderer don't sleep. Wanderer because he's a puppet, Aether because...well he's not human. That's a headcanon thats lenghty, so i wont explain it here. Okay last thing, Aether doesn't speak in ig...full sentences. He skips words sometimes and breaks up the sentence. I don't think he's fluent in Teyvat's language, hence why Paimon speaks so much.

The 4 entered the SereniteaPot after a long and arduous day of commissions, quests, errands, etc. and removed most of their unnecessary accessories.

Heizou swiftly made his way over to the nearest couch and flopped down face-first, probably almost asleep already. “Im not the only one who’s completely dead after all of those cases, right?” Heizou’s muffled voice echoed from the pillows on the couch. Albedo smirked at Heizou’s display of exhaustion.

“Guess it’s time to sleep then already? We did eat while we were out, so I suppose we can go right to bed. It is late.” Kazuha turns and questions, hanging his haori(correct me pls if that’s the wrong thing) up near the door. He places his shoulder guard down on a shelf nearby as well, besides the numerous trinkets Aether has collected on his travels.

“I’m not completely drained but…I suppose we can. Aether, you’ll be resting tonight, right?” Albedo turns to Aether, who was about to walk right back out of the teapots mansion and probably train outside the whole night. Albedo shoots Aether a disappointed look, expecting him to turn back around immediately and follow them back in, but Aether continues to slowly leave the doorway.

“Aether.”

Aether gives Albedo a glance back, almost pleading to not have to ‘sleep’. Albedo knows full and well that Aether doesn’t really sleep, but has still yet to know exactly why. Either way, seeing him at least lay down for the night would be enough.

“…You know I won’t sleep. No point in laying down.” Aether tries to reason his way out of this, preferring to do something a bit more productive.

“Get back here, and come lay down. We’ll even push the couches together like have you have it set up in your room, if that makes you more comfortable.” Albedo nods towards Kazuha after this, and Kazuha goes to start moving the couch Heizou is on and another couch in the open living room.

Aether sighs, deciding not to fight this one, and comes back into the mansion. He leaves his shoes at the door where everyone else’s shoes are, and then comes to help Albedo move blankets and pillows in from Aether's room.

"Where would you even be this late in the teapot? I know you have a small forest somewhere on the islands here, but would you really just train there all night?" Albedo inquires, genuinely confused on where Aether would even go this late since the teapot matches Teyvat's time. Aether looks around, putting a few pillows under his arm and rubbing the back of his neck.

He shrugs. "Dunno...maybe find Wanderer. Train with him? Talk with him. He doesn't sleep either." Aether's taken out the braid he usually wears now, his earing, scarf and whatever else being set at the table in his room. Albedo shakes his head in sighs. Guess he has to talk to this 'Wanderer', who he has still yet to meet despite Aether mentioning him before, and get him to rest as well. They both return to the living room soon after this exchange.

Once everything is moved, the four change into clothing that’s a bit more comfortable, and slowly begin to lay down one by one. Aether grabs a few books, of course. If he’s going to lay here for hours while the others sleep, he has to be doing SOMETHING. Not lay there contemplating his existence.

There’s idle banter for a good thirty minutes or so, chatting about what they’ll do tomorrow, what they’d want for breakfast, anything really. Heizou’s the first to fall asleep, after he curls himself around Aether in an inescapable death grip to insure he won’t be able to leave in the middle of the night without waking anyone else. Kazuha falls asleep next in the middle of his speech, causing Albedo and Aether to chuckle and joke about it for a few minutes after. Albedo then falls asleep last, after wishing Aether a goodnight and almost saying ‘Sleep well’ despite knowing he won’t sleep at all.

Aether opens one of the many books he’s read before, in similar situations of the others forcing him to at least lay down with them. He won’t sleep, but it’s nice to have the comfort of people he trusts being beside him in a moment of repose such as this. They can’t hear Aether but he speaks anyways.

“Goodnight, sweet dreams.”

[theoryfan205]

Words aren't my specialty so prepare for word soup spider-sona post, you have been warned

I have no idea how to start this so let's get the basics I have down! This spider-sona is British because you know I am, sticking to what I know, and so the big city they usually protect is London, have I only been there like twice? Yes! Am I doing this anyway? Also yes! Anyway- this spiderman becomes spider man in more of a freak accident, they're visiting London for a week to check out this new science exhibit put on for a limited time only for people to showcase their research, like art fairs for science! Something like that, working on the details but they're interested and manage to get in to see all the cool things and hear how they work, one of these showcases is showcasing a new experiment on spiders... The scientist working on it plans to induce super speed into a silk web spinning spider, the plan is basically if the spider goes really fast it'll make webs really fast and thus you've got a quick supply of spider silk! You'll basically never run out!

Now they've already done it once successfully on a spider they're showcasing as well and they plan to demonstrate the process live today with another spider, as they're already convinced it'll go well with the experience of having done it successfully before, our spiderman here gets an interest in practically everything, even the spider, leaning in to look at the little fella while listening to the explanation of the experiment. When the time comes for the spider fast experiment it ends up going horribly wrong because the equipment explodes, just.. boom! People knocked everywhere and the spiders get out, our soon to be spiderman is knocked down too and while trying to escape the rubble after the explosion they come across a tiny little spider, they crouch down and look at the little fellow, recognizing it as one of the spider experiments but not remembering what one it was, as it crawls on their finger and they think out loud they get interrupted by a fast bite to their palm, slapping the spider away and accidentally killing it.

They are not going to admit they just killed the spider, and entirely decide to blame it on the explosion as they leave the scene of the spider murder and soon after get rescued, it's a whole disaster and it's quite a mess. Something something spider powers! The explosion from the tech plus the experiments made relatively harmless (uk spiders aren't quite poisonous) radioactive fast spiders, and thus after getting bit they get the usual Spidey powers, sticky hands and feet, Spidey sense, super strength and a new one thanks to the experiments specific to that spider, super speed, that's right I'm fixing the heights problem by giving them super speed! Don't need to swing really high up and risk sobbing as spiderman if you can just run real fast and use the webs to help propel yourself forward!

The inspiration for speedy spider over here is spiders that just fucking bolt when you try to kill them and I had a dream where I was spiderman in a spiderverse and my power was speed so clearly my subconscious agrees with me! For the costume it's green because that's my favorite colour, also yellow because green and yellow go great together! I got nothing else for the design just ideas on them

I don't have a name either, in costume or out of costume, there is a green spider in the UK but it's got a lame ass name I ain't using that, my only ideas are like green widow or something leaning more into the speed side like I dunno the speedy spidster? (Pronounce it like Spidey) it's a work in progress! I am working on it, but basically my spider-sona is the flash spiderman, having to run all the way to London when their vacation Is over to save the day is just a part of their job! I'd imagine something might pop up to get them in London more full time but thats the basics! Also no spoilers for anyone reading but they would so socially awkward in the spiderverse, someone says hi and they blue screen, they aren't prepared for this many spideys

[melodic-cherry]

I dunno if this has ever been asked before, but I must know:

What do you think Tina and Gerald’s relationships are to Cherry? What do they think of her? Is Tina like every fictional MIL that hates her son’s gf/wife and thinks he can do better?

Asking for research 👁️👁️

I have such a drawn out thought out response so this will be LONG like **LONG**

background: in my story that is teeth and cherry centric this is addressed sorta often? So general background on the story is that cherry is opening on the tour that the mayhem is currently going on. So that’s how that relationship begins in the first place. There’s a lot more to go with it But let’s focus solely on how she meets teeth’s parents anyway!

So, how does cherry meet Tina and Gerald anyhow?

• in the story teeths parents are going to visit him on tour from time to time. Considering that cherry is an opening act they’re going to be on the tour together the whole time. So probably wherever they’re staying together his parents would drop in and just meet her. When they first meet, I absolutely believe that Tina does not like cherry whatsoever.. not only just for the fact of her career it’s the type of person that she sort of is at first glance. I haven’t gotten around this part yet, but cherry is an avid smoker, and since his parents are dentists, I’m more than sure that this is like..a point of contention? If that’s the right word? Something close to this

*tina walking in and seeing cherry on the couch smoking inside*

And she would show her distaste thru- well see idk how to write her being passive aggressive? Because she wants to come off as polite, while also being sort of vindictive? Almost mightier than you morally slightly type vibe.

Due to the type of woman that cherry is…., I don’t think she’d really care. At-least when she first meets Tina and Gerald, her and teeth aren’t even together yet. So it’s not necessarily a huge deal the first few times but once her teeth start to develop a romantic relationship…that’s the thing. Thats tricky. But here’s my thoughts based on the story’s canon:

Teeth and cherry take a long time to get together, considering that there is very limiting circumstances. Let’s put it that way. For background in my story teeth is still with Penny and Penny and cherry have a pre-existing familial bond. ( not like actual family close to found family this is a whole diff can of worms itself ) around almost the middle of the story id I say then thats when Cherry and teeth even begin going on dates ?

But for the sake of the question when teeth and cherry get together, what they both think? Whats the relationship?

Gerald: I genuinely see Gerald, as being the lighter of these two. Like you said, in a few of your posts, he gives very malewife that just stays quiet. Another little background thing is is that cherries adoptive father was in a band that I’m going to have Gerald already slightly like in private. So I don’t feel that Gerald has any kind of bad opinions on Cherry in the first place he probably just think she has unhealthy habits and might act too old for her age ( even if she is 25 to someone his age she’s young as hell ) and his opinion probably due to the time when he was growing up. ( yk old people views ) I personally believe that Gerald and Cherry wouldn’t talk a bunch however Gerald would give teeth the advice to do what makes you happy and if she makes you happy that’s all I want at the end of the day, but also understand what you’d be risking ( more lore I haven’t made public ) 

Point: cherry and Gerald would get along just fine. There’s no issues, but I wouldn’t say they ever get close.

Tina: PHEW okay. Loaded one. I feel at first it’s not that Tina dislikes, cherry. I just don’t think she agrees with her as a person. I don’t feel hates musicians I just feel like she wanted her son to do something more productive in his life ( in her own moral code ) also just- pushing her own dreams on her son. Genuinely I feel overtime…. they would have a decent or close relationship in the fact of I can see Tina as being someone who respects people who stand their ground. She seems like a confident person and she speaks what she thinks just like teeth does. Cherry is very similar except she’s more sensitive and not as harsh as Tina but I feel cherry does feel the rejection just straight off the bat. However, throughout the story, cherry doesn’t really give Tina the rise that she’s looking for when Tina is judgmental towards her. When she finds out that her son has feelings for cherry, I can’t say that she’s thrilled. 1) she’s already met Penny and probably is going to be on Penny side just as a woman and just morally? BUT 2) she wants her son to be happy, even if she disagrees with him, and when she gets to know cherry more and hear how her son feels, she might help where she can.

Conclusion: I honestly feel that because of how my story is Cherry will already have a decent relationship with both of his parents when they get together but when they first meet her and Tina will have a very hard time getting along, but they will respect each other. ( weirdly ) Gerald’s just like “I’m here let me live I didn’t say a thing I don’t 100% condone my wife” 😭✋‼️

[eidolonightmare]

will make an acc soon when i can !!!! you use so kmany big words ur like a wizard casting spells . i like the last one the most , i dont know how to read with rhythm but it still sounds cool . i can imagine the few like music ppls i like singing it :3 very talented !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and i will most definately have you help me learn french in the future idf we are friends !!!!!! also THANBK YOU for the list i will take them thru out the night and let you know what i get :DDDDD i love quizzes tysm !!!!!!!! see for me i think i could listen to it and (maybe) read it well but NOT write and not speak ?? that goes for all languages tho

THE LAST TIME I WAS ACTIVE IN YANBLR WAS 2022 (I THINK) WHERE I HAD MY OWN ACC AND THEN SUMMER OF THIS YEAR WHEN I JUST KINDA LURKED LMAO , I WAS TOO SCARED TO MAKE POSTS BECAUSE THERE ARE A LOT OF POPULAR USERS I DONT LIKE AND I DIDNT WANT TO RUN INTO THEM OR THEIR MUTUALS , now i dont care AS MUCH but i still dont like a couple of them tbh

and i have no idea when i graduate . like none uhm .... im also homeschooled (/neg) so that will definitely contribute to if im even like able to . iiiiiiiiii have a slight feeling i might end up dropping out once i am seventeen sdjekjrfr but its okay . will live my house dog dream ^___________^

and i took computer science and i failed it ! so LMAO , U HAVE MY CONGRATS . my neocities is also bland-ish because i REFUSE to use iframes , FUCK that .

and yes i am currently replaying pkmn legends . this might sound silly but ive never finished a pkmn game . tbh story based games bore the hell out of me JDNFIJSRFIERK I CANT STAND TO PLAY THEM . THERYE FUN TO WATCH BUT BESIDES THAT BLEGH

i dooooont have much else to say tbh :P am very sleepy and tired and i doooont really like the tumblor ask system FNWEJFKWJRFK , u can msg me if you want /nf BUT THAT MIGHT BE AWKWARD ???? i dunno dude my social skills are comparable to like . i dont want to say an ant because ants have like tons of interactions but like . i dunno maybe a worm ........ do worms ,,, are worms talkative ? i mean im talkative i just dont know what the fuck im saying . also i think thats kinda funny because i am LITERALLY a dog and yet i have no idea how to interact with anyone or anything , but that is okay , im like one of those dogs who have their like "person" i guess . idk what the fuck im talking about dude .

anyway uhm YEAH feel free 2 msg me if u want but you dont have to because i ammmm not sure if it is an appropriate time to ask so . uhh u do what YOU want yes . yes . OKAY BYE BYE TAKIUNG UR QUIZZES - ALEX THE THE THE MAN BOY DOG WOLF CANINE IDFK MAN

sorry if this response is kinda dry i am Tired. but i wanted to respond.

alright awesome!! heheheh thank you i suppose. thank you! ^_^ i'm glad you liked it!!!

hehehe yippee awesome...!! great great i'm excited to see what you get. i hope you have fun taking them! yeah i get that. that happens to me, too. i think you just have to practice more when that happens honestly... and get more input so you feel more comfortable.

ahh yeah i get that lmfao. one of my friend's exes is on here and i have an ex on here so i'm trying to avoid them and their friends... lmfao. and another person i don't like. real.

oohhh yeah. i wouldn't recommend dropping out if it's possible for you to not because that's going to make things harder for you in the future but i won't judge you if you do or anything. because school is really hard T_T. dog house dream!!

fair tbh!!! some parts of that class were rly hard for me so i understand why that might happen T_T. also real. i just can't figure out how to make it look cooler; maybe i'll work on it some more.

yay awesome. also that's totally fair.

okie that's alright!! i'll message you then ^_^ hehe that's fair. i think i understand what you mean though idk how to describe it either, lmfao.

alright :D i shall message you. yippee taking my quizzes!! ^_^

[unholyxvoid]

that’s sweet of you to say! i’m just some guy at the end of the day though, i’m not going anything special. but i am glad it means something to you. <3

that’s makes sense! for us having pdid, it’s funny that we have 100+ headmates. we have some who are on the nonverbal spectrum, but none who don’t use words at all. i think it would be really frustrating for us, because i, maw, get super frustrated when i go nonverbal from overstimulation and such. i think it’s best we don’t have nonverbal headmates, but i also can’t control it if we ever do. also funny story that when i was in the questioning phase of if we had vessel or not, that i thought bite would be nonverbal? it’s really funny it turned to be the opposite lol. brain really said switcheroo.

i wish you luck with the new headmate though, it’s stressful to find out about new additions. let me know if you need help or anything. i turned on post notifications for you guys if that isn’t weird? i just thought it was better than to keep checking for answered asks, you know? so i’ll see if you post anything about me or something.

yeah, me too! would be fun and a nice bonding experience. i don’t know if i actually know anyone with pdid. i think my ex had pdid but we obviously don’t talk anymore as they are my ex, and even then i was new to discovering our system compared to now. therefore i didn’t really think too much of us possibly having the same back then.

i think the whole darkness thing makes sense for us overall as a collective. because our headspace is exactly as you’ve described yours. it’s just a black fuckin void of nothingness that is shaped but you can’t tell it’s shaped since it’s just pitch black. if this makes sense! we’ve always had a complicated way of trying to get it across. i think black hole makes sense for me though with bpd, like feeling like i’m just a thing like that. i dunno! weird stuff. it’s also funny to me for us that the further i figure out stuff about myself as the main fronter, that our system is very leaning towards aroace and nonhuman. we’ve had an influx of nonhuman headmates recently since i’ve realized i’m more nonhuman than i thought before. it’s been a weird one!

and, too, i would like to figure out more ways that i am nonhuman but i have no idea how to go about that as just a whole of itself. i can describe one way i’ve figured out something for me if that’s of any interest to you.

that’s okay! we also do that, it was just an offer that you can take at any time, and an open invitation to do so, you know? just an established thing! no worries about it at all if you never think of anything. promise.

that’s also okay!!! don’t apologize for things like that, i get it. we’ve been really dissociated for the past few days, so i understand. i hope it gets better soon.

-maw 🪽

just some guy in my asks giving me supply by sending me asks to be fair so like . keep em coming yk lmao /nf

damn post notifications on for us ? youre making me blush /hj do what you gotta man stalk me if you must , trust me i will not complain , youre feeding me well

we dont personally know anyone with pdid i think (im very sorry if we do and just forgor) but our mates have did and theyre actually the first system we ever had contact with , so a lot of what we know and stuff comes from them , but again they have did not pdid so while theyre still very helpful its not like we can really compare our experiences too much

i honestly dont know how many there are . there could be way more than im aware of but i can only really count what i know so i say theres only a few since i only know of a few . the nonverbal thing gets somewhat frustrating for me too especially since i want to talk to iv , but thats honestly less of a problem than him not being around is bc sometimes he just . is gone for a while . and im left wondering if he ever even existed :/

well if you do realize part of darkness then hello me spawn good to know youre one of mine :) and i agree its sometimes a little difficult to explain exactly how we work as well especially with the void being my core being and everything else stemming from that , weve tried making posts about it but i feel like none of them are 100% exactly what id like to convey . and id definitely like to know more about how youve figured things out

[not-souleaterpost]

Lord Dunsany and the broken telephone of "fantasy"

So for my weekly post that nobody will care for, I'll again squeeze out some shit related to a topic I researched for the iceberg, but that doesnt really have anything to do with Soul Eater:

Lord Dunsany is often quted in some "deeplore" "well akshually" stuff to be the father of "modern fantasy", but did all the people who read him miss the point?

So I'll start by saying I wasnt ever into fantasy, it allways seemed kinda corny, only stuff I cared was LoTR cause I kinda grew up and around people were obssesed with it and DQ, cause of the DBZ bleed over and because I just like the slimes lol.

That may makes me disqualified about commenting, but eh, I dunno, I think my point will still stand, cause I will bring it back to Tolkien now:

Some people say he was inspired by Dunsanys "word building" to make his own overly convoluted mythology, but here lies my objection:

The two books I read of Dunsany about "the gods of Pegana" seem not really care about the "lore"

They seem to be written in the style as if they were some holy book, yet the names seem deliberately random and often the storys are either contradictory or mix up the details to make a point and to reflect that feeling of myths that arent organized by some obsessive nerd wiki for logical consistency.

Because in the end the books arent about "fantasy" (atleast the ones I have read), but as kinda didactic laments about the authors perceived nihilism and meaninglessnes/cruelty of the world.

Ok that may be reductive, cause there are many vivid and even beautiful or fascinating things described, but in the end you feel that tone of "Oh that is like fanfiction from the Bible book about how everythings is just meaningles vapor" tone.

Like in "the gods and time" there is a great short story about a prophet who sees the "true gods" and abondons the old ones for them with his followers, only to repeatedly then see even greater gods, only to lose more and more of his acolytes with each subsequent trip and in the end arive back at the old gods he rejected at the star - basically a commentary at the foly for the strive of knowledge or about how things are more simple at the end of it all than one trys to think.

But the important thing is that the "gods" of this short story dont really matter more than for the point they make in it - I would be surprised that for example the "mocking gods" have some specific lore, events and super powers etc like shit in Tolkiens stuff has, or in modern generic fantasy, where everyone is some world or warcraft charachter shooting magical auras.

Still, maybe Im ignorant, and in all the other storys there actually is that feeling of a shared mythology and "wordbuilding" besides the tone of "life's a bitch and then you die"

Anyways, what was the point of this all? I guess to say that it is kinda sad that an innovatitive form of literature gets reduced into the current state of "top ten word building tips!" videos on youtube.

Ok maybe thats to harsh, even I know how fun it is to come up with a setting and its own intrincitys, but still, I think one shouldnt limit oneself to that - its like watching DBZ for the power levels - when the point is that they dont matter.

But in the end, maybe this post just shows my own ignorance - maybe most fantasy does that already. Yet when I allways hear everybody praise some Brandon Sanderson guy, who seems to only care about "magic systems being consistent" and literally color codes his creatures to match emotions or some shit idk😂

And also, I wonder if Tolkien had actually finished more books if he hadnt noodled around with his silly lore matching, especially when it in the end still is contradictory😂🤷‍♂️

Anyways, sorry this kinda sounds more spitful than I wanted, guess its cause I saw some video where they talked about these books as if they were all about just creating some wacky fantasy world, which seemed strange to me after having read even just a small part of his whole work.

So: Yeah...Sorry