#i dont wanna hear 'you shouldn't have taken it so literally' I WAS A CHILD. AN ADULT I AND THE COMMUNITY TRUSTED WAS TELLING ME HOW TO LIVE
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No hate like christian love is right.
One of the most upsetting sermons I've ever been to was when I was around 10 or 12. We had a guest pastor and he was preaching about love, and how much we should love god. In fact, we should love sky daddy so much, that we should literally HATE our family/friends/loved ones in comparison.
I can't even really tell you why it was so upsetting to me. Most people I tell don't think it's that serious and I just end up looking stupid for being upset. I don't think they realize how serious that guy was. But I was a child thinking about having to hate my family, my friends, the people I cared about in order to be a good xtian... and I knew I couldn't do it.
I think it was supposed to be framed as "we xtians have such a higher capacity for love than the evil heathens which means that we can love our neighbors more than them AND love god so much that it seems like we hate them in comparison but we actually don't, because our capacity for love is so much greater because of Jesus" and I was too young to "pick up on that nuance" or something.
But my capacity for love only got stronger when I left.
#i dont wanna hear 'you shouldn't have taken it so literally' I WAS A CHILD. AN ADULT I AND THE COMMUNITY TRUSTED WAS TELLING ME HOW TO LIVE#I'm so fucking sick of being directly and indirectly blamed for things ADULTS TOLD ME#i don't understand how it's my fault for trusting the adults i was told i could and needed to trust. like give me a break#sorry i interpreted things literally and was brainwashed as a child#I'm so irritated that people don't understand. and that my childhood self gets blamed every fucking time#personal
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