#i don't want to grow up and get married and have a kid
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Hell Hath No Fury
(sequel to this ask.)
18+ f!reader. on the run Winter Soldier!Bucky. Dark Bucky. Angst. Violence. Hydra. Kidnapping. Threats of sexual violence. (No actual noncon) Rumlow (he's his own warning.) happy ending.
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~
The Asset was going to be punished. Maybe not right away, and never in a way he could anticipate, but he would be punished. The truth of it rattled in his bones.
He'd had pleasure, warmth, connection. All things that were forbidden to him.
So he'd ran.
But no matter how well he hid himself, the memory of you haunted him. Your conversations, the way your pussy felt on his cock when he split you open, the way you'd bitten his neck like he was yours.
He'd spent months simply observing you before you'd started teasing him. You were quick witted, a bit of a brat, more than a bit spoiled, but never cruel. You touched him without fear and only looked at his arm with curiosity.
You'd started confessing things to him when you realized he really wouldn't speak unless he had orders to. You told him you missed your mother who'd died as a child in an 'accident' you were sure was actually an assassination to get to your father. You told him you wanted a regular life with kids and maybe a cat. You even told him you hated being your father's daughter, the weight of expectation to be perfect and a pawn for him to marry off to whoever would get him the most power.
All the while the Asset had listened, tucking away the information deep into his heart because for some reason he knew it was important. He carried you home after parties left your feet too tired to walk another step in your heels and felt his heart flip in his chest when you nuzzled into him.
Then you'd started testing his patience, showing off your curves without remorse or shame. Tempting him with the softness of your breasts, the chub of your stomach and thighs, the wet heat between your legs.
When he'd finally snapped you'd taken him balls deep without hesitation. And it made him so angry (you'd let that pathetic dildo inside you? maybe you'd fucked other men before he'd been assigned to you. he hated the thought of anyone or anything but him fucking you) he'd used you like a whore, fucking you hard and deep without much thought of your pleasure. But to his surprise the harder he'd taken you the more you responded, clinging to him and begging for more.
Your pussy was sucking him in, milking his cock for his cum while you moaned and drove him crazy with your whines. "Do it, cum in me, get me pregnant I don't care--"
He'd had to cover your mouth, your words worming their way into his brain until all he could think about was seeing you grow round with his child.
The Asset knew he didn't deserve this pleasure but your pussy wouldn't stop fluttering around him, and the second he played with your clit you started fucking squirting on his cock.
How was he not supposed to cream you after that?
Maybe leaving the pillow under your hips was over kill, but some primal part of his brain wanted his seed to take. So he stuffed his fingers into your pussy to push his cum back inside you when it leaked out. You moaned in your sleep but didn't stir.
He licked his fingers before sneaking out the window- but not before he planted his own bugs in the room.
~
"Where did he go?" Listening to your father rage at you was killing him. Bucky- his name, lost for so long but knocked loose by the shock of being with you- knew you had every reason to turn him in. But for some reason, you weren't saying anything.
"I don't know dad. I had a one night stand and he was gone when I woke up." You muttered quietly, and Bucky wished he'd had camera's installed. He needed to see you. Make sure you were alright.
"You're lying to me! These people, darling, they don't like losing an Asset like that. If you don't tell me where he went we'll all have to face the consequences." Your father's voice was tight, anger and fear wrapped together in his tone.
"I already told you I don't know!" You yelled, and Bucky felt a fierce pride in his heart. The longer he was on his own, the more emotions he was able to feel. It had been months since his last wipe and his serum enhanced body seemed to be healing at an astonishing rate. So he was able to admit, he was proud of the woman his whole being had decided was his.
"Then we'll just have to hope they show us mercy."
~
Bucky now knew what his punishment was. You.
When he'd heard the chatter on HYDRA wavelengths discussing a possible reproduction of the serum, his heart was instantly in a vice grip. Of course they'd find out, and any child of his might be enhanced. How stupid could he have been?
By the time he made it to the hotel you were gone, your father dead from a bullet between his eyebrows. HYDRA worked quickly and quietly and Bucky was forced to reckon with his choice to leave you behind.
He had to do something, and fast. The thought of you in the clutches of HYDRA did something horrible to his breathing.
So for the first time since he remembered his name, he went to the only person he could for help.
~
Stevie was still an idiot. And though Stark's son was smart, HYDRA had been stealing his tech for years and Bucky was familiar with them.
He slipped into Steve's apartment without a sound and found the captain sleeping soundly. When Bucky allowed his presence to be felt Steve was up and searching for his shield in an instant. I still got it punk.
"I need your help." Bucky spoke before Steve could panic and call his teammates.
Steve paused, blinking and fully waking up as he took the assassin that was once his best friend.
"B-Buck?"
"We don't have time for this, Captain. I need your help." Bucky hissed, his own panic making itself known. That finally got Steve's attention and he nodded, his face growing serious.
"What can I do? Anything Buck." And Bucky could tell the man meant it. He still didn't trust the memories that had started to resurface, but he did trust the man in front of him for some reason.
"There's a woman. Might be carrying an enhanced child. HYDRA has her and we have to get her out." Bucky was tired, this was the most he'd spoken in years. But Steve was smart, listened to everything Bucky didn't say. She's mine. Can't let them have her.
"I'll tell the team-"
"NO!" Bucky's voice rattled the windows as he felt ice grow in his veins. If HYDRA saw the entire Avengers coming to their base? You'd be killed in an instant. "J-just, just us. Or else they'll terminate."
"Okay Buck, okay." Steve held up his hands gently in surrender, and took a deep breath before squaring his shoulders. "Then lets get to work."
~
It had been a month since the Asset disappeared when it happened. You woke up in a sterile white room with a throbbing headache and in a paper hospital gown. Your skin crawled at the thought of someone touching your naked body when you were unconcious.
"Hello? What kind of B list movie bullshit is this?" You called, trying to cover the fear that was taking over your body with bravado.
"I can see why he likes you." Came the reply when a man opened the door, his scarred face and leering eyes making you push back into the wall to try to get farther away from him. "But too bad. He's no where to be found. Ghost man you know?"
The man seemed to be enjoying himself until a second man popped his head in, an equally ugly look in his eyes as he looked over you. "Says there's still been no alarms tripped, Rumlow. He hasn't made a move."
"Thanks Walker, good job." When it was just the two of you again, Rumlow came over to crouch in front of you. He took a lock of your hair and rubbed it between your fingers. You wanted to throw up.
"You're pretty enough I guess. But honestly I'd just fuck you to make your precious little soldier boy pissed. He's the one who did this to my beautiful mug." He grinned as you cringed away, seeming to enjoy your revulsion.
"Don't worry, as soon as you pop out his brat I'll put another one in you." The threat made your stomach twist, but thankfully that was all he seemed to want to say. He stood and turned to leave, only pausing to smile at you once more- as if he knew that's what made you the most uncomfortable, seeing his scars pulled tight over his teeth.
When he left you curled around yourself, and the life inside you that you hadn't even known about until now.
We're gonna be okay. Your daddy is gonna come get us. I know it.
~
In the end it took four weeks. Four weeks to find information on where you were being held, plan out points of entry and exit, as well as transportation.
Bucky thought he knew pain, thought he knew everything there was to know about ways to torture a human being. But hearing chatter from some asshole about how he couldn't wait to force himself on you as soon as the baby was born was a new form of hell. That asshole, Rumlow Bucky found out, seemed to be the only real leak about you.
Everyone else barely mentioned you, trying to keep their new treasure to themselves. But Rumlow couldn't help himself. His putrid personality on full display as he talked about 'some girl' that Bucky knew in his bones was you.
It was the only connection Bucky had to you, listening to Rumlow go on about how fiesty you were and how he wanted to break you. It made Bucky decide Rumlow would be the last one to die. So Bucky could let you watch if you wanted.
By the time Bucky and Steve were heading out, Bucky couldn't even sit still. He paced the outdated quinjet Steve had stolen like a feral animal on a dangerously thin leash.
"We'll get her back Buck. We would've heard if something had happened." Steve had been a good partner in this, Bucky knew. He had done his best to reassure Bucky everytime he felt like tearing his hair out. (Could only admit to himself that Steve matched up with his memories almost eerily well, kind funny and protective of those he cared about.)
"Rumlow's been quiet. What if-" Bucky couldn't finish the thought. You were his. If Rumlow had touched you in any way, Bucky would have to start by breaking his fingers one at a time.
"He would've been bragging by now." Steve muttered as he flew the quinjet to the HYDRA base, one of their smaller facilities to distract anyone searching for you.
"Fly faster."
~
Something was different today. Instead of Rumlow coming in to taunt you, you'd been left alone. Every time your door opened for them to bring you a meal you heard lots of footsteps rushing around.
"What's going on?" You asked the tech assigned to feed you, not surprised when all you got was a look.
"Just tell me some gossip dude, I've been stuck in here for weeks." You tried to hide your desperation behind a charming smile, and it almost might have worked if Rumlow hadn't chosen that moment to stroll in.
"Get away from the subject." He growled and the tech snapped their mouth shut before scurrying out.
"Looks like its your lucky day princess. You're gonna get to see your boy toy get killed." You didn't rise to the bait even as your heart leapt in your chest, narrowing your eyes at the waste of space as he started pacing. You didn't want to give him the satisfaction of a reaction.
You noticed three things right away. One was the massive gun strapped to him, one that looked more like alien tech than anything else. Second was the fact that he was blocking the door. Third, was that the son of bitch looked a little nervous, his mouth pressed into a flat line instead of his usual sneer.
"This? Oh I'm glad you asked," Rumlow held up the gun and pressed a button. The machine hummed to life and started glowing an odd shade of blue. "This is the newest HYDRA enhanced SHIELD knock off. Should even be able to destroy vibranium. Can't wait to test it out."
You heard a blaring alarm through the door, and for the first time in weeks it was your turn to smile.
"That gun you got?" You stood up, hand instinctively going to your belly as you taunted the man. "Isn't gonna be good enough. Cause he's coming for both of us and nothing will stop him. That's why you're afraid."
The slap surprised you, in your entire stay in this hell hole he’d never hit you. You cradled your cheek and glared at him with all the hate you had in your heart. You knew it would bruise, knew the throbbing pain wouldn’t go away for hours.
“Shut up! Just shut up! I’ll kill him, then I’ll kill you. But not before I get what I want.” He took another step towards you and you scrambled away, something clicking in your brain. You would have to survive—even if he touched you. For your baby if nothing else.
“I’m not going to die here.” You weren’t sure who you were trying to convince more, but the door opened again and Walker barked at Rumlow,
“He’s here. We need all hands.”
“In a minute!” Rumlow growled, but Walker shook his head.
“Directors orders.” Walker spoke firmly, and Rumlow cursed as he looked at you with something unhinged in his eyes, his grip on the gun tightening like he wanted to use it on you.
“We’ll continue this later, princess.”
You waited till he’d left before allowing yourself to sink to the floor, gasping for air as the reality of what was going on hit you. If your Soldat didn’t come for you, if he died (and fuck you didn’t even know the name of your child’s father) you’d be at the mercy of Rumlow and Walker with no way out.
You wouldn’t let that happen.
~
Bucky didn’t hesitate to slit the throat of any HYDRA agent coming his way, while Steve merely incapacitated them.
“Really Bucky?” Steve groaned as the pile of bodies grew. He had some misunderstanding that the lower ranked agents were somehow less guilty. But no, Bucky knew better. Ever single one of them would sell innocent lives for a chance for more power.
Bucky didn’t bother to respond.
12.
He moved with deadly grace, his knives slicing through the air before landing in the bodies of his enemies with frightening accuracy. He’d been armed to the teeth and hadn’t even touched a gun yet. That would’ve been too merciful.
15.
He kept a running tally of his kills as he was taught, his entire body searching for signs of you and Rumlow. Somehow he knew you wouldn’t be far apart. So as he worked his way deeper into the base and found two men, one with a scarred face that was vaguely familiar and a blonde who looked like a cheap knock off of Steve in front of a door with a heavy lock, he knew he’d found you.
“Look what the cat dragged in.” Bucky would know that voice anywhere, and he merely stared at Rumlow. He knew his icy flat stare was unsettling and used it to his advantage. But despite the fear Bucky could smell off of Rumlow as Steve finally made it to Bucky’s side, he continued to talk shit.
“Too bad you’re too late. Your girl’s cunt is good stuff. I see why you’d kill for—” The knife lodged itself in Rumlows shoulder with a sickening thud and the man cried out in pain. And then Walker tried to back away, looking for ways to escape.
“Son, just don’t.” Steve warned before the coward ran, making Steve curse before going after him.
“Open the door.” Bucky’s voice was monotone, another knife appearing in his hand before it was thrown into Rumlows thigh.
“Over my dead body.” Rumlow tried to aim his gun at Bucky, but it was quick work to break his hand and toss the gun away. Bucky grabbed Rumlow by the throat in his metal hand and began to squeeze.
“Open. The. Door.” Bucky murmured lowly, watching with satisfaction as Rumlow slowly turned purple from the lack of oxygen. Just before he would’ve snapped Rumlows throat the man gasped out,
“Open, code R-two-D-seven-alpha-eight-six.” His voice was barely audible but the technology beeped anyway, the lock turning green. Bucky loosened his grip on Rumlow but didn’t release him.
Dragged him behind as he walked to the door, hesitating for the first time since this all started. Would you even want to see him?
When he stepped inside he was ready to grovel, apologize in every language he knew.
What he wasn’t prepared for was you launching yourself at him blindly, kicking and biting and screaming,
“You’re not gonna fucking touch me!” Rumlow got dropped like a sack of bricks, gasping for air and choking on it as Bucky grabbed your hands gently, speaking as softly (he didn’t even know he could do that.)
“Это я. Я не позволю им прикоснуться к тебе.” It’s me. I won’t let them touch you. Bucky watched as you slowly stopped trying to attack him, looking at him for the first time.
“Y-you’re really here?” You couldn’t stop the way your voice trembled, your eyes darting over him as if you couldn’t really believe it.
“Da.” He nodded before looking over his shoulder at Rumlow on the ground, trying to force his body to move despite his injuries.
“You want me to kill this guy for you?” Bucky asked in English this time, making you blink in surprise.
“You can speak English? You can speak?” You blurted out in your typical sassy way, making Bucky smile for the first time in months.
“Focus, do you want me to kill him? Because I will.” He was completely serious and he watched you truly consider it for a while, before shaking your head.
“You can put a knife in his dick though.” You were completely serious and Rumlow tried to crawl away, but Bucky moved faster easily.
“Тебе не следовало брать ее.” You shouldn’t have taken her. You watched with bitter satisfaction as Bucky kicked Rumlow onto his back and threw his final knife into the bastards crotch. Watching him howl in pain made you smile, and you went to your Soldat’s side grabbing onto his metal arm.
You looked down at Rumlow and grinned. “Told you, asshole.”
Then some other guy, Captain fucking America you realized with a start poked his head in the door and glared at your Soldat.
“Bucky we need to go. Reunion can happen later. They’re going to destroy the base.” The blond spoke swiftly and your Soldat, Bucky?, nodded.
“Let’s go.”
“You’re name is Bucky—?” You tried to ask before you were swept into Bucky’s arms, his grip on you secure as he started running behind Steve.
“My name is James, but apparently my friends called me Bucky.” He explained quietly, not even the slightest bit out of breath as they ran until they found a car. Bucky set you inside like you were made of glass before coming to sit beside you and slamming the door shut. Steve took to the drivers seat with a roll of his eyes. Tires screeched as you all drove away, and for the first time since you’d been taken your body allowed itself to break down.
You breathing started to grow fast, too fast, as you hyperventilated and started to shake. Tears fell down your cheeks as you hugged yourself. Bucky reached for you and you flinched without thinking.
“It’s over. I swear I will never leave your side again. You… or the baby.” He spoke with such conviction, fierce protectiveness in his gaze when you finally did look at him.
“You knew about..?” You asked as you tried to keep your sobs in, feeling like you were going crazy with the different emotions raging through you. Fear, relief, hope, it was too much to process at once.
“I’ve been trying to get you back since the day they took you.” He admitted quietly, holding his hand out slower this time, palm up in supplication. “I’m so, so sorry I left you. I didn’t know what else to do.”
“They hurt you too. That’s why you worked for them.” It wasn’t a question, you’d seen the way his ‘handlers’ had treated him when you first met him. They spoke to him like a dog.
“I didn’t have a choice. You were what loosened their grip on me.” You took his hand, even though your fingers were trembling, and he brought your knuckles to his lips. “You saved me.”
“Then I guess we’re even.” You smiled a bit sadly, knowing it would be a long road to deal with everything that happened. But you were safe. And so was your baby. Even Bucky was back with you.
“10 minutes out to the quinjet.” Steve spoke quietly, and you startled. You honestly forgot he was there.
“Thanks Stevie.” (You noticed the way Steve’s eyes went wide, grew misty as he drove, and you wondered why that was.) Bucky carefully pulled you closer so he could wrap his arms around you, so his bones could know that you were safe.
“Where are we going?” You asked, looking up at him worriedly. “What about the baby? They wanted the baby, won’t they come for me again?”
“Let them fucking try.” Bucky growled, his arms tightening around you. “I’ll figure something out. But for now, just rest. I’ll keep watch.”
Now that he mentioned it, you were exhausted. And you trusted him. He’d come for you, just like you knew he would. And no matter what happened in the future, you knew he’d always come for you.
So you nodded, cuddled closer into his chest and promptly fell asleep.
~
Bucky carried your sleeping form into the plane, and Steve was amazed by how gentle his friend was with you. Bucky wouldn’t let you out of his arms let alone his sight.
Steve still couldn’t believe it. Bucky, who he’d thought was dead, was alive and somehow freed from HYDRA’s control. Bucky, who he’d thought was so broken by HYDRA that he barely remembered Steve, had called him Stevie like they were kids again.
And Steve knew it was because of you.
He was glad he’d put some other plans into motion while they’d been preparing to come get you. Plans that included Pepper creating a legal case in Bucky’s defense and sending Natasha to uncover HYDRA’s secrets to expose them.
It wouldn’t be easy, and there would always be people looking to get their hands on your possibly enhanced baby. But with the way Bucky was curled around you like a dragon with his treasure—Steve wasn’t worried. Anyone who tried to come for you again would have to deal with a wrath the likes of which no one had ever lived to tell.
Hell hath no fury like Bucky when it came to you.
#bucky ☆#bucky x reader#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky x you#bucky barnes x reader#f!reader#mina writes ☆#dark ☆#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes smut#bucky smut#tw dark content
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Hi there! I just read through a few of your long form posts -- the one about the boss and the glue traps and the lizards, the one about the friend and the radishes and the cop, and the one about the breakup and the car and the neighbor's car and your dad -- and I'm just really blown away by your writing. And I'm just curious, are they actual experiences or are they fiction? They read like actual experiences, and the writing is so naturalistic and...idk, low key sweet, stream of consciousness without the major sidetracking that often happens in stream of consciousness writing and also more...more poetical in a way, I guess. I don't know. Are you published or wanting to? I mean I couldn't help with that or anything but if you've got a book out I'd love to read it.
Patrick McManus was kind of THE legendary writer to my family. When my dad was a kid, he'd sit on the porch the door that the monthly copy of Outdoor Life was going to arrive, and as soon as he got it, he'd run in with it and take it to his dad, who would gather all his kids around and read the stories out loud.
My dad loved it because his dad would make a whole performance out of the readings: He'd do voices, pantomimes, dramatic sound effects, the works. The stories are amazing, but the out-of-character behavior from his dad was half the selling point. Grandpa Hank was, to his core, a good man. But he was gruff, and socially, pretty stiff, and he didn't often show emotion. I think my dad said he saw him tear up one time growing up, and it was when he got dropped off at the MTC. My mom was married to my dad for three years before Grandpa Hank was comfortable enough to sit down in their house, and he liked her. That's just how he was.
(You just praised me for not getting sidetracked, but I'm letting myself wander down those memories a bit. He died last year. I miss him terribly.)
Anyway: Those stories were how I first started learning how to spin a yarn. I got older and I got more influence than just cowboys and Westerns, but the soul of my style is still just The American Tall Tale.
Which is to say that they're not outright fabrications. When I say that I cut all the worms up in my backyard and had a panic attack and hid in a tree until my mom got me, that happened. But I only remember the vaguest outlines of the words that were said. When there's a line in that story about my mom telling me that she's sure the worms will forgive me because they got six hearts to love and no bones to pick, that's not how she talks. That's how I talk.
Other stories, they're far less fuzzy than that, but I can still point out things I don't know. Wrestling story was from middle school, and a lot of those "crisp details" are just me painting by vibe. I've had some people that did wrestling through highschool point out things like refs not actually counting to three, or how double-legs are not actually super effective for tall wrestlers. I don't actually know how much the woman I wrestled weighed, nor do I remember how much I weighed, except that I was more than two weight classes smaller than her. Car incident, I got broke up with, went to her parents door, waited on the lawn, and was given some olives to go with a wireless phone. But exact wording of a lot of the people involved fails me. As a rule, the weirder an event is, the more likely I am to be distinctly remembering it and not just filling in the background. Except for dialogue, which often turns out weird because when I have to make up things for other characters to say, it carries too much of my own speaking style in it, and that's always been weird.
There are even points where things do come right off the rails. In the stories about J post, J himself became a sort of mythic figure after he moved, and lot of the stories about him, I don't even know I'm remembering them first hand or second hand from a story someone else shared with me.
I know it would be easier to just go, yeah, they're true, or no, they're not, but I did a weird thing and mixed them up and now even I'm a little confused.
Regarding publishing: I'm not published, and the thought of trying to get published scares the shit out of me. I
I don't know. If anyone has advice, I'd be interested.
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You know I don't think Timmy actually ended up sharing Wanda and Cosmo for all that long with Chloe in the grand scheme of things.
I mean there's various points in the show that seem to imply that having Fairy GodParents is a temporary thing. Like extremely temporary for most kids.
As in even being 10, and having gotten Cosmo and Wanda at age 8, Timmy's considered as having been a GodChild for a long time. Even if that's only a couple years.
Like there's a reason why there's multiple episodes about all of Fairy World being interested in whatever Timmy's up to.
Timmy's an outlier case.
He's going to end up aging out of the system (bar any breaking of any major rule that the fairies can't find a way to forgive) and everyone knows it.
They made a whole live action trilogy of bending the rules just for him where he gets to keep his fairies as an adult, and then turns into a fairy at the end of that trilogy.
He's a, probably wouldn't have made it to adulthood without fairies, kind of a case.
That's not the case for most kids who get fairies, or at least it's heavily implied that's not the case for most kids who get fairies.
Take Cosmo and Wanda being Crocker's fairies in 1972, and having already been his fairies for about 2 years by that point, but having had been Billy Gate's fairies in 1970.
We're never even given a hint that Billy lost his fairies traumatically, because he grew up to invent the internet just fine, and we never hear about him beyond that. And it seems like if a kid traumatically loses their fairies before their ready, it ends with them being a screwed up adult.
Which tells me that whatever situation Billy was in to need fairies resolved itself shortly after the time travel thing.
Heck even then, it was heavily implied that Crocker's life, even qualifying for fairies, was better than Timmy's was. Considering the only things mentioned is that he's got a single mom that works multiple jobs, and when she doesn't she tends to focus on her hobbies, and an evil babysitter to deal with.
He's not bullied at that point, he's not struggling academically, the only things wrong with his life (before getting over dosed on magic mindwipe and being disfigured and losing his mind as a result, which turned him into a social outcast) is that he's got a single mom who works a lot and leaves him with a mean babysitter so she can have me time.
That's it, that's what makes him qualify.
And he would have aged out of at least one of those problems before turning 18. He would have been 14 when he would have naturally outgrown needing to have a babysitter (as that's how old Vicky starts babysitting Timmy).
Then by that point he would have also been old enough to get a part time job of his own. Lightening the financial lode on his mother, and possibly freeing up some of her working time to actually spend with her.
Meaning it's possible that both of his fairy qualifying problems would have resolved themselves by age 14 or 15.
But also the kind of miserable it takes to get godparents (at least when that baseline is first established) is temporary for most kids.
I wouldn't be surprised if the typical Fairy GodParent & GodChild relationship typically only lasted like a year or two for most kids.
[And it seems like the majority of kids we meet who have GodParents, get them at age 10.
I'm pretty sure Timmy being 8 and getting his Fairies, is the youngest kid we ever see having Fairies.
Other than de-aged Vicky that one episode, but because it happened in the constraints of one of Timmy's wishes, I'm not going to count it. Especially because when Cosmo and Wanda are reassigned to Vicky, no one comes to erase Timmy's memory of having fairies, so she doesn't have to worry at all about hiding them which all other godkids do.
Also Vicky is just given Cosmo and Wanda and not her own fairy, which I feel heavily implies that all of this is falling under wish logic, and not normal logic.
Crocker is the second youngest, because he had Cosmo and Wanda at 9.]
Especially in cases where the root of the kid's misery is something they have the power to personally confront and change.
Like if a kid gets a fairy because they're being bulled at school to the point it's ruining everything else in their life. [Bully is making it to where they can't complete school or home work, causing grades to drop, meaning no extracurricular stuff, and getting in trouble with parents.]
But that kid manages to reveal what's happening, and gets things to change, and their life goes back to how it was before. Then that kid obviously doesn't need a GodParent anymore to make up for their miserable life.
I could easily see plenty of situations where a kid might only have a GodParent for less than a year.
Like Hazel's situation from A New Wish weirds me out, because all her problems are super temporary problems that resolve in like a few months to a year for most kids who have those problems.
It's missing her older brother who left for collage. Which most kids eventually get over after just getting used to them no longer living in the same house as them.
When the younger sibling gets used to the older siblings absence, a pretty good chunk of them revel in the bizarre experience of being either the new oldest, or an only child for the rest of their own childhood.
It's moving to a new city and having to make all new friends. Which Hazel does over the course of season 1. She's got 3 friends if Dev counts.
Everything causing her to need fairies is all extremely temporary. Which is a large part of the reason why I don't think she'll be one of the kids to age out of the system the way Timmy was.
She's got parents who love her, she's not struggling at school, she doesn't have an abusive babysitter, she's already started making friends at her new school, her brother came home from collage, but even then that's something she'd just grow out of eventually.
So I feel like unless something in her life changes for the worst, she's going to only have Cosmo and Wanda for a few years at most. And lose them around age 14-15.
Sure her problems are a lot more relatable than Timmy's ever were.
Which is understandable considering Timmy was a kid who had literally everything going wrong in his life, except he wasn't living in poverty.
From neglectful parents, being bullied as school, an abusive babysitter, being specifically targeted by a teacher for harassment, being the target of a girl's stalker crush on him, being canonically considered an idiot even without Crocker targeting him (even though I'm pretty sure he just has ADHD). And that's just the major stuff he starts off with.
That's not even getting into like the magical enemies he makes over the course of the show. Who are out to get him from then on.
And the fact that his parents weren't actively malicious towards him, just forgetful and oblivious.
But Hazel's problems are also all a lot more temporary than Timmy's ever were.
And that's like, the big thing that makes them different and give me the feeling that, while Timmy definitely aged out and had fairies until the last possible moment, kids like Chloe and Hazel probably only had fairies for a few years at most.
That's most likely why Wanda and Cosmo still refer to Timmy as their last godchild before retiring. Even though they were assigned Chloe years after they were assigned to Timmy.
Chloe's issues probably resolved at some point and Timmy returned to being a singular GodChild from that point on.
[I'm guessing she grew a backbone at some point, lets her parents know all the pressure they put on her was making her miserable, and stopped being a complete doormat for literally everyone. Because those were her big problems that caused her to qualify for Fairies.]
Which was probably extremely awkward for Timmy in the aftermath of Chloe having her memories purged of fairies, considering they only spent time together because they were made to share fairies.
Sure Timmy had seen kids lose their fairies before, like with Remy, but he'd never cared then because he hardly spent any time with Remy, and no one would call him and Remy friends.
But it had to be weird when it inevitably happened with Chloe, because by the end there, she basically lived in the Turner house.
Heck of the two kids who get fairies in A New Wish, I'd say that Dev is the kid more likely to be an age out case than Hazel. If he ever regains godparents.
Considering having a single parent, who literally loves business and money more than he'll ever love his own kid, is a bit more of a permanent misery than "I moved to a new town and have no friends, and my brother went off to collage" is.
Just to be honest.
Like maybe it's different rules because Hazel is a post-retirement passion project for Cosmo and Wanda, and they can stay with her until she'd age out because they're not on official rotation or whatever.
But no one will be able to convince me that she'd actually need fairies the entire rest of her childhood unless something horrible happens to her in season 2.
Like baby girl those are some temporary issues that tend to resolve themselves within a year, how are you going to keep qualifying for fairy godparentship the rest of this series?
#fairly oddparents#fop#fairly odd parents a new wish#I don't think I've seen anyone talk about how Timmy and Hazel's cases are wildly different#in that Hazel has mostly temporary issues that could all be resolved in like a year#while Timmy's issues tended to be stuff that he'd be stuck with for at least a few years but possibly just until adulthood or maybe forever#like his parents oblivious neglect of him is something that he's just going to be stuck with the rest of his life#he can out grow needing a baby sitter and having Crocker for a teacher he could study to improve his grades#he's implied to eventually ended up married to Tootie in the Channel Chasers timeline#so my guess the stalker gets what she wants in that timeline#and god imagine having Vicky as an in-law. I pray everyday Vicky's family cut her off once she turned 18#I hope that's why she's still stuck doing kids entertainment stuff as like a 36 year old who hates children and isn't married
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Bout to muse about something that is part headcanon part canon events
ㅤ
Tails is finally saved from his bullies by the (currently) small time hero he admires
Tails stalks follows his hero, uses his mechanical knowledge to improve Sonic's plane
While Tails follows Sonic around, even on dangerous journeys, the hedgehog keeps an eye out for the younger fox behind him, keeping him from being in too much danger
Sonic leads by example, demonstrating to Tails how to fight, and Tails runs maintenance on Sonic's plane and teaches him how to read
Soon enough, they become softly inseparable. Even if they can't adventure side by side (although they do more often than not), Sonic keeps contact with Tails whenever he can.
They strengthen each other's weak points. Where Tails lacks in raw strength, Sonic makes up for it with experience and speed. Where Sonic lacks in firepower, Tails has a machine, a gadget, or the technical know-how to take one. Sonic often rushes into danger, fighting without thinking too hard, but Tails' specialty is strategizing or making plans, and he's one of the few who can slow Sonic down enough to make sure he's prepared. And where Sonic supports Tails by being a force of nature, someone who can roll with the punches and execute one of Tails' plans with complete trust or faith, Tails also supports Sonic by understanding what he cannot, by crafting plans when Sonic is at a loss for how to proceed. They have such unwavering faith and trust in each other's abilities now.
Where Sonic is a hero, Tails is his own kind of hero, saving the people only he can save, helping in the ways only he can help. They support each other. They look out for each other. Even if Sonic is a force on his own, or Tails can go on solo adventures, they're more effective when they're together.
And no matter how things change as they grow, the people who come and go, the two of them are a constant. Sonic and Tails, ever at each other's sides.
#sonic the hedgehog#sontails#unbreakable bond#miles tails prower#tails the fox#i just be ramblin#Sorry they just make me emotional and insane#Although really the only thing that's solidly a headcanon and not either canon or my reading of them is that Tails teaches Sonic how to read#Despite them being 'hero and sidekick' I always like to think that as they grew (both up and closer to each other) and as time passed#they maintained this push and pull. They slotted into place as partners that support each other and help where the other falters#And really no matter what happens relationship wise or life wise with the two of them‚ I can only imagine that they still live and fight#together#Tails could get married and Sonic would still crash at his place and Tails would still keep food for him#Sonic could get married and/or have a kid with someone and Tails would move right in with them (if they don't just straight up stay with#Tails)#No matter what happens I can never see them not at each other's sides#And of course I like the idea of Tails starting out a bit more codependent but ultimately someone who works to support Sonic so he can#continue to be needed/wanted and be at his side‚ while Sonic‚ who initially believes that he let Tails into his life and is protecting him‚#grows more secretly codependent. I think Tails is aware of how important Sonic is in his life (even if Tails has interests and wants and#whatnot outside of him)#while Sonic is...the kind of guy who believes that he chooses to keep Tails by his side‚ but whose world would also begin to crumble if#Tails disappeared (and I think Sonic Prime gives me pretty good ammo with that)#Gaaaaaah they just fascinate me. they fascinate me🥺😭💖
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venting something fierce
#chiot talking shit#part of me genuinely wants to leave my law degree unfinished and turn away from any job in my field because whats the point#when my family wont be here to see it all happen#and part of me feels like all this growing up is turning into moving on and i don't want to do that#i'm starting to see these big important life moments like graduating and getting married and having kids as me just leaving them behind#its definitely just all the death and shit getting to me and i definitely just need to get back in therapy and grow tf up#but also like what do you mean i cant just decide to be 11 again playing video games with my dad and my brother and everyone was healthy#and everyone was still here
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anyways i know this is a stranger things blog and maybe i've said this before but i'm not watching season 5 regardless lol
#stranger things#like frankly that's netflix's fault#i have no interest in a show that clearly does nawt know what it wants narratively#also like i already know that there is no possible conclusion to this series that i would like#already the bts is kind of putting me off#like respect respect to the cast and crew and writers and editors#but also i already wrote the end to this universe in my head i don't need it to get messed up in my head#which like it's probably gonna affect how i read fic and content in the future post s5#but i literally spent YEARS on and off reading teen wolf fanfic having only watched two episodes so#which a little soapbox in the tags but it is honestly soooo annoying that we as a society have moved from annual seasons to waiting years#bc ok it's been months for the characters but YEARS for fans#and considering a lot of the cast started as kids like. they grow up FAST#they are supposed to be like 14. and they are OVER TWENTY AND GETTING MARRIED#and having the comparison of them being much closer to their projected ages in s1 .... like come on now
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Every single time I defend someone shitty who has done nothing but be a cunt to me because they did 1 (ONE ) decent thing THEY ALWAYS TURN AROUND AND DO SOMETHING SO MUCH WORSE TO ME
#every single time i praise aomeone for turning a new leaf they fuck me over#my life is continuing getting worse and worse and worse and worse and i really don't know how much longer i want to deal with this shit#if things do not change soon I'm quitting I'll run away and i will never come back#i praise y sister for growing up she steals and then lies about it and i print with out a shadow of a doubt she did it wont admit it#coworker who bums job off onto me dose. one piece of work then fucked off and dowe nothing else all day then spreads rumors i lied about my#moms cancer#like i can pull up her obituary bitch#dad dose 1 nice thing then like let's me go to bed instead of doing all the dishes that accumulate while i was at work#then need day turns me back into a slave#is goin to marry his yandere bitch gf my mother has not been dead a year yet good for him#I'm done#i hate being alive i can't daydream about anything anymore except death#i used to be able to daydream ocs n stories that stopped years ago then it was day dreaming about a better life with my wife#that's hard to believe it'll ever happen in just trapped and my dad constantly discourages me getting independent or doin anything for mysel#no don't get a full time job don't move out you cam never do it no don't try to learn sewing again doing try dnd again doing make new friend#don't do anything to make like nice#I'm allowed Wednesday nights after the kids go to church and that's it and if it clashes with family aucks to be me#and i don't get to make. it up the next day like dad#i cant stand my life i hate it so much#i hate my family minus my four youngest siblings#i hate my job i hate waking up i hate feeling exhausted all the time#being alive is disappointment and work I'm tired of it#I'm tired#i dont want to do this anymore#i need something to change but I'm trapped nothing will change unless i do it#and i hate that I'll probably have to leave ao much behind
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god the duality between 'I don't want someone in my house' and 'yeah I'd like my own kids and no way I'm doing that alone'
#like ppl who don't want kids should be free to live their lives without ppl being like 'watch out! your biological clock is ticking!'#that's bullshit ppl shouldn't say that. but also. i would like kids and#after so many years trying not to get pregnant and that seeming like a worst case scenario. so desperately wanting to not become my parents#now i am an age where I'd happily have a kid if i were in the right life situation & i don't feel I've got all the time in the world anymore#lol like. the space in between 'too young to have a baby' and 'old enough that i risk more health issues/ will be an older parent'#feels way way narrower than i ever would have assumed lol. esp. because all the parents in my family are so young. the idea of being an#older parent is so strange to me. I'm so aware of the things you can't do when you're older and how it's harder work to run after them#and like my body is already wearing out way faster than anyone elses. my health's only gonna get worse so.#being an older parent just doesn't seem an option. not to mention like. the older i am the less generations I'll get to see.#i want to be a great grandmother damnit. lol.#like I'm on a clock. to get over my commitment issues or it legit won't happen. but yeah. can't think of anything worse than having#to have someone in my house. if i was rich enough to have lots of space that's one thing but. I'm not lol.#and rich ppl rub me up the wrong way whenever they try and chat me up so doubt I'm gonna marry in to money looool#like i have come to terms with the fact that. if it doesn't happen it doesn't happen. id rather not get to be a mother than to settle#like that whole 'looking for a partner' dating life is not for me i can't think of anything worse. if it happens it happens#I'll either meet the right person who im willing to give up an empty house for or i won't looool#and it's not like im giving up the whole raising kids thing completely.#like I've got to play a significant hand in raising my siblings even if i didn't ask for that. I've got to see them grow and#help them reach those milestones. and whatever the circumstances I'm blessed to have had them in my life#even if i don't have my own kids I'm always gonna have kids in my life even if I'm an aunt rather than grandmother you know#I'm lucky to be in a family where raising kids is a communal thing. but yeah id love to have my own kids & have someone that looks like me#but I'm not willing to bring someone in to the world in non opportune circumstances deliberately.#like if it's up to me i want them to have 2 parents to look out for them and 2 parents that at least stand a chance of liking each other lol
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the older I get, the more the technological changes I've lived through as a millennial feel bizarre to me. we had computers in my primary school classroom; I first learned to type on a typewriter. I had a cellphone as a teenager, but still needed a physical train timetable. my parents listened to LP records when I was growing up; meanwhile, my childhood cassette tape collection became a CD collection, until I started downloading mp3s on kazaa over our 56k modem internet connection to play in winamp on my desktop computer, and now my laptop doesn't even have a disc tray. I used to save my word documents on floppy discs. I grew up using the rotary phone at my grandparents' house and our wall-connected landline; my mother's first cellphone was so big, we called it The Brick. I once took my desktop computer - monitor, tower and all - on the train to attend a LAN party at a friend's house where we had to connect to the internet with physical cables to play together, and where one friend's massive CRT monitor wouldn't fit on any available table. as kids, we used to make concertina caterpillars in class with the punctured and perforated paper strips that were left over whenever anything was printed on the room's dot matrix printer, which was outdated by the time I was in high school. VHS tapes became DVDs, and you could still rent both at the local video store when I was first married, but those shops all died out within the next six years. my facebook account predates the iphone camera - I used to carry around a separate digital camera and manually upload photos to the computer in order to post them; there are rolls of undeveloped film from my childhood still in envelopes from the chemist's in my childhood photo albums. I have a photo album from my wedding, but no physical albums of my child; by then, we were all posting online, and now that's a decade's worth of pictures I'd have to sort through manually in order to create one. there are video games I tell my son about but can't ever show him because the consoles they used to run on are all obsolete and the games were never remastered for the new ones that don't have the requisite backwards compatibility. I used to have a walkman for car trips as a kid; then I had a discman and a plastic hardshell case of CDs to carry around as a teenager; later, a friend gave my husband and I engraved matching ipods as a wedding present, and we used them both until they stopped working; now they're obsolete. today I texted my mother, who was born in 1950, a tiktok upload of an instructional video for girls from 1956 on how to look after their hair and nails and fold their clothes. my father was born four years after the invention of colour televison; he worked in radio and print journalism, and in the years before his health declined, even though he logically understood that newspapers existed online, he would clip out articles from the physical paper, put them in an envelope and mail them to me overseas if he wanted me to read them. and now I hold the world in a glass-faced rectangle, and I have access to everything and ownership of nothing, and everything I write online can potentially be wiped out at the drop of a hat by the ego of an idiot manchild billionaire. as a child, I wore a watch, but like most of my generation, I stopped when cellphones started telling us the time and they became redundant. now, my son wears a smartwatch so we can call him home from playing in the neighbourhood park, and there's a tanline on his wrist ike the one I haven't had since the age of fifteen. and I wonder: what will 2030 look like?
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current struggle in putting together my ideas for this portrayal is being unable to decide just how chaotically divergent i wanna get
#i could entirely scrap her being amy and rory's kid#but tbh it wasn't a terrible twist#but it was still weird ish#don't love doc marrying his besties child even if he didn't watch her grow up idk it's wEIRD#but it could be so hard to just scrap that entire thing esp if i wanna interact w ponds#my biggest thing is just not being here for how much moffat made her obsessed w him and have her entire life revolve around him#and making the entire 'love story' feel infantilized and overly produced and contrived bc he couldn't value simplicity and humanity#he couldn't just let the doctor be human enough to fall in love w a woman who was his intellectual equal#a woman who couldn't just keep up w him but challenged him#she had to be a magical tardis baby who was raised to kill him and threw a tantrum to get him to marry her#like i just#it felt so disappointing compared to the woman we first meet in her introduction#i want her to be her own person with her own beautiful story who happens to be tragically in love w a time lord
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The older I get, the more I just realize that I am my mom
#miranda talking shit#No I'm not she's amazing and badass I could never but....#Her in my caring ways. I just act more and more like a mom as I grow#Like her... I see a wounded. Lonely and sad person/creature and I am already trying to adopt it#It's a bit of a problem when I consider how I work... Romantically. If I compare her and dad's relationship... Ummm#I always say I don't want to end up in that kinda relationship but then I'm also on the sideline falling for everyone with some kind of#Problems ™. Last crush? Mommy issues deep ones among other things.#The one before that? Deppressed weed addict. The one before that? Um....#Well we were teens so shan't say but definitely big... Troubles in family#I guess the wounded seek the wounded and whatever but like... Yeah#At one hand it's scary bc my mom just married the man with generational daddy issues#But also I struggle to se myself ever like someone who don't have some sort of... Either trauma or mental problems.#Bc I... Know people without it struggle so hard to understand and I need to be understood#I at least never think I can “fix” those people. It's never been about that for me... More like... Ah you can understand me in this pain?#But I am definitely dangerous for people who look for motherly care bc I'm literally just...#Ok im holding u.... Only thing saving me is that my energy meter is too low to ever mommy someone with practical things#I'll get you a glas of water and tie your shoes occasionally but bitch I ain't cleaning your messes#I barely clean my own...#At one hand i hate being this way bc... I don't have kids like why would I need to nurture. But then someone compares me to an mother and#I'm crying. To me being compared to an mom is like them saying they know I love them unconditionally. They are saying they see I care#I know it's meant as an joke or half insult but each time I'm like (: yeah... Good that my love is reaching you
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mini vent so I can sleep
#idk why i deleted my vent blog i need to make a new one#vent kinda thing#peppa talks#my mum's side of the family were all really close and i pretty much grew up with my cousins and we'd see each other all the time#big events like Christmas we'd all be together#but then also random things through the year like meals and parties and holidays we'd do together#but now that we're all grown up they don't really come to any family events anymore#they've all got partners and some are getting married and having kids and even the ones my age are in committed relationships#where they'll go to their partner's family events#and just feeling the family grow apart when i know I'll never have that?#I don't want a partner and I'm happy with that fact. but seeing everyone else drift away just hurts sometimes#like. what happens to me when they're all gone? it already happened last year when they all went to new years with their partners#and i was left alone with my parents aunts and uncles all telling me i should be off having fun like the others are doing#but I miss how it used to be and the fun i used to have with the family. and i just don't know what's going to happen when i never date#and I'm too cautious to ever insert myself into my friends' lives. especially when they have a partner#because i always put myself as their last priority and nobody has ever contested my placement#i know it's my fault and I'm self sabotaging but i give my all to all my friends and even when I'm putting all the work into the friendship#they'll still let me drift away and stay as the lowest priority#so when I'm older who am i going to have? I've never been close enough to my friends for them to take me in#my family will have their own families#and I'll just be. there#I'll always continue to believe in people and hope they think to take me on. or even that my family gets closer again one day.#but so far the hope has gone unproven#this got into a much longer vent than i thought#i know it's just 1am thoughts and I'll be better in the morning but it's been lingering with me for a few days now so i needed to get it out
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“Daddy’s Home”
Telling the LADS Men you're pregnant. The setting? Happily Married and both parties want kids. Nothing but fluff here (All these men are substantially financially stable and I love that for us)
Zayne
MC: Zayne I have something important to tell you
Zayne: I'm listening
MC: Im pregnant
Zayne: ....
MC: Baby?
Zayne: Im going to be a father?
MC: Yes we're having a baby
Zayne: I need to childproof the house. I'll need to work more hours.
MC: You already work inhuman hours
Zayne: We need a bigger house. Should I build it? I should build it. Why are you standing? You shouldn't be on your feet
MC: Sir I am 2 minutes pregnant we have time to prepare for this bundle of joy
Zayne: They'll need a college fund, driving lessons, a tutor...
Zayne continues mumbling and mulling over every single detail to himself
MC: I guess I'll relax enough for the both of us
Rafayel
MC: Raf sit down I need to tell you something
Rafayel: Why do I need to sit down?
MC: Its safer
Rafayel: My Lemurian senses are tingling but I'll trust you
MC: Okay breath in
Rafayel: *breathes in*
MC: now breath out
Rafayel: *breathes out*
MC: I'm pregnant
Rafayel: *Chokes on his spit* WHAT!
MC: Im 2 months pregnant
Rafayel: I'm gonna be a mother????
MC: No you're gonna be a father
Rafayel: Can I handle this? Can I still eat seafood? Am I allowed to swim in the ocean?
MC: Why are you acting like you're the one carrying twins?
Rafayel: TWINS?! I GET A TWO FOR ONE DEAL?!
MC: What am I? A yard sale?? Don't say it like that
Rafayel: You’re really pregnant?
Rafayel grabs your hands and holds them to his chest where you can feel his heart racing
MC: Yes we’re going to be parents
Rafayel: you....and i....preg-.... twi-
MC: don't pass out please don't pass out right now
Rafayel: *Passes out anyway*
Xavier
MC: Xavier?
Xavier who was currently laying with his head buried in your lap with his arms wrapped around your waist.
Xavier: Hmm?
MC: Do you want a baby? With me?
Xavier rubbing small circles on your lower back with his thumb as he stirred in his sleepy state
Xavier: I want everything with you
MC: Good
Xavier: *Dozing off*
MC: Because I’m pregnant
Xavier: That’s great
MC: …
Xavier: …
MC: and 3….2……..1
Xavier: Wait what ???
MC: You heard me
Xavier: So I’m a dad?
MC: Father to be
Xavier: We have to start their swordsmanship training right away
MC: How about we take it slow like letting them grow in my stomach first?
Xavier: Oh I guess you’re probably right
MC: yea now lay back down
Xavier snuggles right back into your lap placing soft kisses on your stomach that isn’t even showing yet
Xavier: My little angel
Sylus
MC: I need your help how would you tell someone they're a father?
Luke: Im a father?!
MC: Luke shut up
Kieran: *Shoves Luke*
Luke: Sorry
MC: I just don't know how to tell Sylus
Sylus: Tell me what?
Kieran: Me and Luke are uncles now!
MC: Kieran!
Sylus: You’re pregnant?
MC: *Shows the pregnancy test* We’re having a baby
Sylus: Looks as though my efforts weren’t in vain
MC: You were trying to get me pregnant?
Sylus: Why do you think I constantly had you in a mating press?
MC: Sylus! Don’t talk like that in front of the twins
Sylus: *chuckles* I can’t wait to see you plump and glowing with our child princess
Later….
Kieran: I can’t wait to teach them sarcasm
Luke: I’m definitely doing everything their strict parents tell them not to do
Sylus: You two. Sidebar. In my office. Now.
MC, In the background: ooouu you guys are in trouble … bad uncles and the baby isn’t even here yet
#love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#lnds sylus#sylus#love and deepspace sylus#lads#lads rafayel#lads zayne#lads xavier#zayne love and deepspace#rafayel love and deepspace#xavier love and deepspace#nikaaaaimagine
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Not your wife
Synopsis: The walls of the Gojo estate were big as always. The atmosphere cold like before, more than ever since the sudden end of Gojo Satoru's and your honeymoon. And the meeting with the higher-ups was coming near...
Or: Satoru Gojo doesn't even know how attached he will grow to his wife yet.
Pairing: Gojo x reader, 6200 words Masterlist
Contains: arranged marriage, generational trauma, jujutsu clans and higher ups, much Angst (I'm saying, MUCH angst!) Angst to comfort at the end, after this part will come more, but this will be the end of their introduction to each other
A/n: Alright it took awhile, but I still hope you will like it and it will be worth the wait for you! Like always I'm happy about any comments, they make seriously my day <3
Gojo Satoru was always the strongest and most powerful man in jujutsu society, you knew that.
You heard stories when you were a kid. Your father remembering the meetings with the Gojo Clan more than your birthday. And he was always fascinated by this boy with these absurdly godlike talent.
And then there was his daughter. You didn't have any talent. No, you didn't have the power to make any adult cower before you.
And you were a girl.
It was only natural your father forgot you or at least tried to. Then how could he look at his child and see that he was not the one his Clan prioritized, because he didn't have a worthy heir.
You were an only child, much to your parents dismay. Your father was… Well he couldn't have more kids. You could still see the doctors, and the screams of your father. The crying of your mother. You were six, when you realized you were doomed.
Doomed as the girl who ruined her father's life and name.
It could have been worse. Your parents didn't treat you too bad. They mostly left you in the hands of the maids and Servants. You ate alone since your eighth birthday. Your father couldn't stand eating and looking at you and your mother didn't want to be alone with you.
But it wasn't the worst. They didn't hit you or anything like that. They were frustrated, of course and they still are, but they knew you could still be useful to the Clan. And you knew that one day you would have to marry some man, hopefully a clan leader, to make up for the fact you weren't a boy.
Your mother did teach you personally. And even if she just did so you could get a husband, it still showed she cared.
You didn't live like the golden boy Gojo Satoru.
No, you knew he was special since your father told your mother and you that 'this one boy could be the rising of the jujutsu society to a new level!'.
Your Status was so different from his, you could laugh.
There was one time you saw him, before you two married. And of course that wasn't in the arrangement time, he didn't show up to meet you personally, but it was at a Clan meeting a couple of years ago.
How old were you? Fourteen? Maybe even fifteen. And your parents were arguing about if you should even come with. Your father was livid. 'How could I show myself, when she is there to remind everyone?' he yelled.
But your mother insisted that you should show yourself to start leaving an impression. 'She has to find a husband.' your mother was ice cold. 'And she has to start young. Don't you want a connection to the Gojo Clan?'
'As if Gojo.' He looked at you and that was the first time you had heard him laugh. 'As if she and Gojo…'
The difference between you and Gojo was always clear to you. And you knew that everyone else knew too. But your mother pushed through and took you with her. The ride was silent and you could stil see the empty eyes of your father.
His ego was so easily bruised.
As you made your way into the big estate of the Clan, you could feel the stares of the maides and the servants. Even they knew what you were. Who you were. And why your parents scowled as they came with you.
'So lovely to meet you.' Mrs. Gojo had that same smile you would see on her years later. And when you thought about it, she and your mother had tension between them even back then.
'And who is that beautiful lady?' she smiled at you, her hair was perfect, her dress made perfectly for her. She was a lady in power. But everything was only held together by the pretty golden ring on her ringfinger. Pretty but heavy, you knew that even back then.
'Our oldest daughter.' you father held up this nothing saying face but you could see his frustration.
'And your only one.' Mr. Gojo spoke up behind his wife and had the same but more smugly smile as he looked at your father. And you didn't miss the clenching of your father's teeth.
'Where is the young Gojo boy?' of course even back then your mother searched the control in the situation. And she always did a good job in directing the tension into a different direction.
'Oh, he is out playing.' Mrs. Gojo waved her hand. 'Some of his friends came by.'
He was out playing. His friends visited.
That was the moment you first really realized just how much different you lived. You had to beg to go outside, to attend meetings. He could just leave when his friends asked for him. Hell, he was allowed to play with friends! It was almost surreal how such an important figure had such a normal relaxing life.
'You can join them of course?' Mrs. Gojo smiled at you. Not much later you were send outside into the little yard of the estate.
Gojo laughed with some kids. They were running around, made dumb jokes you didn't understand and furthermore didn't talk to you. You were the weird stuck up girl to these boys and boys shouldn't talk to girls. That was stuck in their dumb teenage brains.
But in Gojo's eyes was something that ticked you off. This look of knowing. Maybe it was your paranoia but even back then you were sure of it, that he understood your different status and what it meant.
So you couldn't say you were that surprised.
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
"How was your Honeymoon, my Lady?"
You tried to smile as you looked at Hina. She was smiling softly and only now you realized just how much you missed her. The cold walls of the big house were not missed.
"Lovely." you held your things close to yourself, most of your baggage already brought into your room. The uber behind you drove away, now that you were back home. If you could really call it that.
"You look exhausted?" she didn't miss the eye bags under your eyes. But they weren't hard to miss, after all every night was a fight.
"Just missed my own bed." you moved, Hina taking some things from you. Your steps steady, determined.
"Is that why you came back so abruptly?"
You couldn't help but stop in your tracks. And you wished that was the reason. But it wasn't. It was also not the reason your husband wasn't in the uber with you. It wasn't the reason why you longed for your own room.
"Yeah. Just was a bit exhausted." you smiled at the lovely girl in front of you. "Will you excuse me?"
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
"My lady?" Hina's voice was soft, like it was scared to speak to loudly. "Dinner is ready and Mr. Gojo is waiting for you."
Your room was dark, the curtains closed and your back to the door. Since hours you were laying in your bed trying to sleep, to relax like those nights when you slept well. But it didn't work, nothing worked.
"I will be there in a minute."
You heard her steps distancing from your room. And with a heavy feeling you stood up. Your gaze dropping to your night table. The hairpin of your mother laying there, neatly. So put together.
Next to it the letter of the higher-ups. It reminded you of the following Friday. The meeting that was waiting for you.
And the husband that was waiting for your presence.
It wasn't easy to get up, to take all these steps towards the room with the person you really didn't want to see. In fact you didn't want to see anyone.
The table was big as always, filled with food you knew wouldn't all be eaten. Your seat open and waiting for you. And across from it, he sat. Satoru.
His head was down, cutting his meat as he chewed. He didn't look up as you sat down, no he gripped his fork harder as he ate. The nerve of him.
"Did you get home safely?"
"Yeah, I did." you took a bit of the food around you, even though you were nowhere hungry. "I wouldn't be here if not, would I?"
He stopped chewing for a second, his eyes almost going up. But he didn't and swallowed. "I guess."
The silence that flooded the room was filled with tension you felt familiar with. It was like when you were eight again, the dinners after it was revealed you would be the only child of your parents.
He was mad.
He cut his food like he hated it. And his blue eyes were like storms, fighting and brewing. In the end you still didn't know this man.
"Will you go to meet them?"
He had no right to look at you like that. No right, to make you feel guilty, to make you feel like the villain here.
"Will you disappear for a mission again?"
He was silent. And he should be. It was humiliating, how he left you to ride alone home again. Just mumbling of having to work instead of talking to you.
The sound of chewing and eating was the only thing that filled the room and it wasn't too long until you were finished. He stared at you, watching your doing. Now you couldn't bear yourself to look at him.
"You could have come to me. You could just tal-"
"I want to eat alone from now on again." you cut him off. You didn't want to hear his oh so great ideas, as if he knew your position.
He was quiet again. You took that as a sign to continue. "And I want to promote Hina, if that's okay. I still need a personal maid, to help me prepare for our later Clan events."
You stood up, the conversation was finished for you. You couldn't bear to hear his accusations, feel his piercing eyes on you and endure this tension in the room.
You hurried to take the steps to your room, Gojo not speaking up again.
Maybe you were overreacting. But if you felt the way you felt, why try to act not like it? He said he wanted to see your real emotions, he could feel it.
After yesterday you wouldn't need to be told twice to give him the cold shoulder.
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺ Yesterday
"What is this?" he held the cursed piece of paper up, the one you didn't know about. The one he just stole from you.
"A letter for me."
You looked into his eyes, your face was scowling now. He didn't have the right to just take your things, sneak around in your business and then act like you did something wrong.
"From the higher-ups." he let out a low joyless laugh. "You talk to them regular?"
He was intimidating. His body seemed so much bigger suddenly, his eyes like blades and he towered above you.
"Talk about me with them?"
"Stop." you narrowed your eyes as he let out another of these scary chuckles.
"Do you tell them all the things I do?" he shook his head and a scary smile mirrored his laugh. "Tell them everything about our marriage?"
"I said, Stop." you snatched the letter from him, finally having it secured.
"Is it true you meet up with them regular?" he didn't smile anymore. Didn't laugh. There was only this vulnerability and you did feel bad. But in this moment all of it clashed down on you, your exhaustion and everything on top made you overwhelmed like no time before.
"Why do you care?" you turned around trying to hide the tears that were clouding your eyes. Suppressing the heavy breathing and the hiccups. The shaking. Everything was becoming so loud, so alive.
"I care!" he became louder. "If my wife is talking to old hags more than to me! I care when she meets up with the people who controlled my whole life, and discusses me with them!"
Now it was your turn to laugh. "You want to talk about control?" you shook your head. "Gojo, you had freedom! My whole life was built up to marry you, that is my whole purpose. You had control, you had the freedom to have a childhood! It is my duty to meet up with them, I have no other choice!"
Now you could feel his infinity. It felt unstable, uncomfortable, just awful in your back. "But you do." his voice was eerily calm. "You could have talked to me. You could have come to me, instead of working with them!"
"Oh please, do you hear yourself? Working with them, what do you think they talk with me about?" you turned around to look at him and the sight shocked you. He looked like a whole different person. What a smile does to a lerson right? And how the disappearance of one changes one.
"Well it's worse enough that you feel the need to keep it from me."
"What do you expect from me?!" you screamed now, the exhaustion now making your head dizzy. Or was it really just the exhaustion?
"Do you expect me to tell you everything? To immediately trust you? I don't know you, Gojo!"
He flinched at that, the anger in him was rising. "At least I try to get to know you! You just run away from me and don't even consider us working together! How should I know you, if you don't open up?!"
"How do you expect me to just open up?" you hiccuped, the tears now falling, the paper in your hands getting wet. "Since the beginning of the discussion of this marriage you rejected my existence. You made me deal with our Clan relationships alone since our wedding day, how do you expect me to just share all of it now with you?"
Your breathing was uneven, the tears blocking your lungs, making it oh so hard to breathe.
"But I am trying right now-"
"I know, okay?" your voice began to fall apart, becoming more hoarse. "I know you try, but a couple of conversations don't fix everything! I don't expect you to fix everything right now, but you have to forgive me if I can't switch up after a couple of days. This isn't your issue, it's mine."
His body was shaking a bit. He was still so tall, you couldn't look at his face, it seemed impossible. "I think our marriage shouldn't be discussed with these old hags. That isn't just your issue, it's mine too."
"It's not about how our marriage is going." speaking was hurting a bit, and the words were heavy on your lips. It felt so unfair. "It's about what… I should do. How my Clan relies on me in this. How I have to steady their relationship with the Gojo Clan." Through a heir.
"And how can I trust you on that?" his eyes seemed so coldly empty, it was almost scary. A person can be so different. His words stung and at the same time almost made you laugh.
"You talk a lot about me needing to open up and trust you, but at the same time you sneak into my letters and my business." You stood up.
"I think that says more about you than me."
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
After that evening Gojo said he had to go on a 'mission' and that the Honeymoon would be fine to be cut short. He left the same morning. There was already an uber for you ready, the little hotelroom for yourself and his things long gone.
You really shouldn't surprised and you hated yourself for crying that morning after he left. But it still hurt. How he could always just leave. You felt so alone.
And now you were 'home'.
You couldn't stand looking at him for too long that was clear from the dinner yesterday. You couldn't stand his anger.
You just wanted to curl yourself in a ball and sleep forever. But even the sleep was a chore, the nightmares still not leaving. The only good time was with the young Hina, who made you go outside and for the first time you explored the big mansion you were living in.
And even though it was tiring, you were happy she made you go through the big halls. It gave you a task, a new adventure, something else than the next meeting with them to focus on.
The garden was beautiful. All the flowers, some you have never seen or heard from before, blooming in these varieties of vibrant colors. The big trees giving a safe place from the sun and a small lake, which you could sit next to.
"Do you feel better, My lady?" Hina was desperately trying to make you feel better, she was really a sweet girl.
"Yeah, it's calming here." the breeze which made your hair float a bit was refreshing.
"I'm glad." she smiled, "I was a bit worried after you ate without my lord this morning.
The cold that came over you made you shiver. What should you tell her? What would she think of the truth? How would she react? You'd better not tell her, hina had other problems. Hina shouldn't find out what you're going through and even if she did, would she tell Gojo? Would she tell him what your mother said to you? No, you couldn't risk that, it just wasn't reasonable.
She was such a nice girl.
So caring. So open minded. How were you so lucky? To have a face around you that's not stoic? You couldn't be more thankful.
"Oh, We just agreed to eat separately because of our different bed and his work time. And he has to eat early, that's why."
She locked a bit perplexed. And the little frown on her face told you that she didn't really believe you. But she didn't press anymore, just explained the flowers to you.
"Should we go to the library next?"
"That sounds lovely."
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺ Satoru never felt so bad. Yeah, he felt guilty a couple of times but never like this. But at the same time he was hurt. It felt like something was pressed down in his stomach and pushed around, when he just thought of these old bastards working with you.
He felt terrible. How was he supposed to act now? he wanted to go talk to you, but at the same time he felt like that would only make things worse. You worked with these people, you tolerated their ways. These people who were the root of the problem of this doomed society.
Maybe you did it all for your clan, but shouldn't your marriage with him be your priority now? Maybe he was being a selfish asshole, but it just hurt so damn much.
And then there was the letter. He still had the second letter, the one from your mother that you had left on your bedside table.
And he just didn't know whether he should open it or not. Actually he wanted to, actually he had to, because he wanted to know what was really written in there, but…
There was also the hurt look on your face when he had opened the other one. Every time he closed his eyes he saw this vulnerable expression on your face.
Would you even be able to forgive him then?
At the same time, you had lied to him and he just didn't know what to believe anymore. What should he do?
The paper in his hands was heavy, hard and incredibly uncomfortable in his hand, it was as if it was cursed.
He still knew the letter from the higher-ups by heart.
Dear Mrs. Gojo,
We are pleased to inform you that your little misstep is being forgiven. We hope you have a good honeymoon. Despite everything, we are still very unhappy with the incident and hope that you have learned from it to let us know before you act. But we are glad that you have taken the matter into your own hands and wish you happy days in which you hopefully get your husband under control.
See you at the next meeting.
The paper rustled in his hand and although his heart was beating incredibly fast, almost like to stop him, he opened the paper with his shaking fingers.
He was in the jujutsu academy near his old classroom. His mission was long finished. Earlier this day he wanted to talk to Geto about everything that has happened but his friend had accepted a mission that would probably take a while.
And now Satoru was alone to make probably a bad decision.
On the letter were numbers, no rather a date not so far away, which made him shiver.
Something was odd with the way the letter was written, the writing of your mother felt eerily. And he felt cursed energy. No, there had to be something wrong with your mother.
Should he really read it? Was it really his business what your mother was writing you?
The last week he got to see and hear you cry every night. Whispering your mother's name in fear. Maybe you did because you missed her. But something about this woman ticked something in him off.
He didn't want to sneak around behind your back.
But it began to be his business, the moment he started to care about his darling wife.
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
The Friday knocked on the door of your mind every minute of every day. And even though you didn't want to open the door for it, it did come around.
And you knew as you woke up that it would be torture.
You were tired. It was surreal how you could even stand up. How were you supposed to attend a meeting like that?
With a heavy heart you got ready and your eyes fell on the old hairpin your mother had given you - she really was everywhere.
This morning hina hadn't come by your room at all to tell you that gojo was eating breakfast.
Was it really still that early? No, it was almost noon. Oh God, noon! You had to get ready, you should be there soon!
Once again, they had scheduled so much time that you felt horrible. Would you have to listen to them babble on for hours again, the nasty words about your clan and how you would defile it?
"Hina?," you picked up your things and got ready. "I have to go now, would you please let the cook know that I'm not eating here today?"
There was no answer for a long time but eventually the girl came in with wide eyes.
"What do you mean, you are going?" she asked.
"Of course, Ihave to go to the meeting, didn't I tell you? Ihave an appointment." you took your hairpin and this time you even got ready with it.
"But why today?"
"I told you I have to go today. It's Friday, isn't it?"
Hina seemed different, somehow more tense than usual and it didn't make you feel good.
"If you say so." she said and picked up a few things that were dirty. "But please come back on time, not as late as last time, my lady."
A chuckle escaped you, as you saw her worried look. Why was she so tense about this?
"Don't worry, I won't die."
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
"Did you make any progress?"
You wanted to eat your words. Since you came into the building you once called home you felt like a corpse. Your mother wasn't here, the maids telling you she got sick this morning.
You thought it wouldn't be that bad without her but you were mistaken. Normally she would sit beside you on the other side of the table, but now you sat there alone, like you were fighting against them on your own. Like no one here was on your side.
"My Honeymoon was lovely, thank you." you didn't know how the sentence slipped past your lips, but your exhaustion made your tongue slippery and your attitude bigger.
"Be careful young lady, you can be very thankful you are even still his wife! After your little misstep you can be very grateful for our forgiveness." an elderly woman spoke.
Every meeting she picked at you and took you apart. She always seemed so mad at you.
"I am." you lowered your head, hitting yourself for your carelessness.
"So there is a baby on the way?"
The leader of them, an old man with a long beard was looking at you with a neutral look. You could never read him.
The question scared you since you left for your honeymoon. This pressure on top of you was making you sick. The weight of it making you dizzy. What were you supposed to do? If you told them no, you could easily be banished back to your own Clan, and lose all of respect your mother had left for you.
If you told them yes, then you had to…
No, no, no, no, why? Why did you have to be a puppet for them? Why couldn't you just live? Why did you have to push all your emotions aside and drown them?
You were so scared of the night. So scared of the act you should have already done.
"It isn't, isn't it?" the elderly woman laughed as you gripped your stomach.
And even though it was empty, you felt like throwing up.
"I told you!" the woman stood up. "This girl shouldn't have been chosen for this! We need a woman who knows what is at stake here, not a filthy selfish little girl, who cries at the pressure!"
Every word pierced you, and you hated that tears formed themselves.
"Someone like your granddaughter?" The 'leader' of them raised an eyebrow. "Please, Kamo, that's ridiculous. And not in our control. Mrs. Gojo wanted to meet every girl and judge them personally. And be in control of the relations with other Clans."
His look at you was just as poisonous, regardless of his previous words.
"We have to work with this. Until we have found an alternative."
An alternative.
You were screwed. They had already a search going for a replacement. Were already ready to drop you and break the news to your Clan.
"I think she is misunderstanding something." A man, who was a bit younger than the rest, smiled smugly at you. "This whole thing isn't about love or wanting to do things. It's about what you have to do."
"So just get it over with and spare yourself the trouble?"
Your body felt so heavy, everything tense, fighting the urge to run away, to throw up and hide all at once.
Suddenly the door swung open and one of the guards came in completely out of breath and visibly agitated.
"I really tried, but I just couldn't stop him! That's just not in my power." he was out of breath.
"What are you talking about?" the old 'leader' stood up and suddenly looked so small. His eyes were big, something like fear was there.
"Well.." the guard looked uncomfortable.
And then you heard it. At first you thought it was one of them but then you realized.
"What do you think you are doing, talking to my wife like that?"
No, that couldn't be. How? How was he here? Why? What did you give away? No, this had to be one of your dumb dreams. Because it just couldn't be that Satoru Gojo just came through that door-
Oh.
Satoru had clothes on you had never seen on him before. It was an kimono, the usual for Clan leaders. His face was concentrated, didn't show any weakness in front of this important people. Instead it was almost belittling how he looked at them.
"There you are sweetheart!" his face lit up, as he spotted you, there was no sign of your fight and his anger. There was just Satoru.
He walked over to you, all these oh so mighty people clearing the way for him. He didn't even bat an eye at them. Without any hesitation he sat down next to you.
"Now, it really wasn't polite to not inform me of this meeting." he looked at them, with one of his challenging smiles. "But I will forgive it this one time. Now, what did you want to discuss with the Gojo leaders?"
You could see the shock in their faces. The elderly that screamed earlier, now glaring at you. Her gaze was almost cutting you, it was that sharp. And the old leader hesitated before sitting down.
"What are you doing here?" you whispered into his ear, careful to be silent enough that they wouldn't hear you.
"We will talk later." he grabbed your hand and squeezed it gently.
"This wasn't really a meeting with the Gojo leaders." the slightly younger man spoke up, breaking the silence from the mighty higher-ups.
"Oh, but I don't understand." Gojo tilted his head. "If it wasn't then why did you speak to my wife?"
A shiver went down your back as you saw into their faces. They didn't say anything. Suddenly the position of power was shifted and they were careful to say something.
"It was about her duties for her Clan." the elderly woman shook her head. "And she was specifically asked to be her alone."
"I wonded," His grip on your hand tightened. "What of these duties are so important, you can't discuss with me too? Because last time I checked, my wife's Clan was the Gojo Clan now. So what responsibility does she hold that I don't?"
Your hands began to sweat. All of these people were shooting daggers at you and you felt like you would be murdered if Satoru left the room.
"She still has to make the relation of the Gojo Clan with her old one better-"
"And why can't I be there too?" Satoru started to laugh. "That's the thing you don't really have a reason other than to play my wife against me. Don't you?"
You couldn't help but lower your head. The tears now pushing your head down.
"Well, she wanted to come alone with her mother!" the woman who seemed to be called Kamo spoke loudly. Now you could feel all of their gazes. "Didn't you, Mrs. Gojo?"
Your body began to heat up, fire embracing you, swallowing you whole. It was itching. Decisions, decisions, decisions, why were you not doing anything, why couldn't you move? Your own body felt like a prison.
"You dumb girl, say something!" you heard her scream again. "If you don't then-"
Suddenly her voice died down. You could feel the shift and pressure was falling off of you onto the ground. And as you slowly rose your head you saw the woman pressed onto the wall, the others all in a fighting pose.
"Be careful what you are saying." Satoru's voice was icy. His eyes were like a warning and he didn't even move to activate his cursed technique. Was that the great Gojo your father was so fond about?
"Anyone talking ill about ot to my wife makes themself the Gojo Clan as enemy. And you know what I'm capable of."
The woman dropped to the ground.
"I think we can move the meeting to another day, can't we?"
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
"Why were you there today?"
Satoru sat on the opposite side of the dining table, the car ride home with him long behind you two. You waited till home to talk to him, the courage finally growing.
He stopped eating and looked up at you. He still had these clothes on, the ones that mirrored his real position.
He shifted in his seat, his eyes avoiding yours.
Then he sighed and dropped his cutlery. "I didn't want you to be alone with them."
You shook your head. "Why? I told you, it's just about-
"Stop it." he raised a hand. "Please let me talk."
You kept quiet after that. Now it was your turn to look down.
"I've been so angry the last few days. You accused me of not knowing you, but at the same time you pretended to know what my childhood was like. How could you have known that? I've known these people since i was little, i know about their games, their desire for control and especially their obsession with strength."
His voice was slightly shaking. "I'm not denying that I had some freedom, but I want you to know that a big cage is still holding someone down. And these people have always controlled my cage."
You wanted to say something, but every sentence that your head crafted was forgotten in the next second.
"But," he began, his voice now a little firmer. "It still didn't give me the right to be like this to you. Mainly I want to apologize to you and that I came to the meeting today was not because I didn't trust you but because I couldn't stand the thought of them torturing you."
"I'm sorry for invading your privacy. I know it wasn't right and I'm sorry that I only realized it after I read the letter from your mother."
You pushed the chair back so violently, it fell over. "You did, WHAT?"
Satoru looked down, shameful.
"That's why you knew where and when we would meet up?" you couldn't contain the hurt in your voice, but for the first time you didn't care.
He nodded.
"Do you really think I'm acting against you, or-"
"No!" Now it was his turn to stand up. And in only a matter of seconds he stood right before you. "It's not because I think badly of you!"
His hands were going through his hair, making it much messier than usual. You saw how he bit his lip, and it felt surreal to see Gojo Satoru so vulnerable.
"I- All of this was just driving me crazy!" he sighed frustrated. "Knowing you meet up with these people and didn't even want me to know about it. Knowing these people were talking and seeing you more than I was."
Your mind went blank as you looked at his eyes. Were they always this sad?
"When you said you wanted to have a Honeymoon to get to know me, I felt so happy, so relieved!" he turned around and paced around the rooom.
"Do you know how you look at me?" his voice was shaking. "Scared. You look at me like you are scared of me. Like I will do you wrong. Like it's me that's pressuring you."
He stopped in his tracks and let out a shaky laugh. "And then I thought that I was maybe imagining that and you weren't scared of me."
He shook his head. "And then I saw the letter. I didn't read it right away, but when I asked you some things, you lied to me and had that scared look again. And… I don't know, it was so crushing to know you never wanted to go with me on our honeymoon!"
His voice broke down a bit at the end.
And as you stood there, you felt yourself becoming shaky too. You didn't want him to think that. You were mad at him, you were still hurt, obviously, but…
You didn't want him to be hurt too.
"Satoru…" you began, but he raised another hand to stop you.
"That still doesn't excuse what I did. I don't want you to pity me into forgiveness."
You shook your head. "I am at fault too." One step towards him. "I just have my problems to trust you right away. But you were right."
You smiled as you looked down. "I do accuse you of not knowing me, but then run away from you trying. That's unfair."
As you looked up, he was already looking at him. And you could see a slight redness in his oh so blue eyes.
"I will try to open up more."
He gulped as stared at you. "I will be patient. And- I will make it up to you, till you forgive me! Really, I will never invade your-"
You chuckled a bit, some of the forming tears in your eyes escaping. "It's alright Satoru. You don't have to promise the world right now."
"Let's take it slow. That's a start."
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺ It was late at night. You were sitting on the couch in Satoru's big living room. You were watching a movie, he was begging to show you.
And for the first time since that night you were relaxed and all the exhaustion fell from you. Your head fell onto his shoulder, any feel of shame was long gone from being so tired.
He didn't move as you were drifting into your long awaited sleep.
"Hey, can you hear me?" he was whispering as you hummed.
"I still want to apologize. For not appearing to any arrangement meetings. I never did that."
His shoulder was really soft and you felt so heavy.
"I hope you sleep well, sweetheart. You deserve it more than anyone."
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
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#jjk x reader#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojou satoru x reader#jjk#jjk satoru#gojo angst#jjk gojo#arranged marriage#gojo fluff#satoru gojo#jujustu kaisen#satoru#gojo x you
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Breeding – Gyomei X Fem Reader.
Will slowly be releasing my Kinktober fics hehe. Of course, if you don't want to wait and would like to read all of them, check out my Patreon! (link in bio) they are very good and very very spicy <3
Summary : You and Gyomei try for a baby. That's it. That's the fic.
You gulped as you tried to not let your nerves effect you but failing as you jittered on your bed. Every single noise that came from within your house made you jump before you realised it was nothing, and definitely not the person you were waiting for.
You knew it was only a matter of time before your husband showed up, the man always punctual and never negotiating coming home to his wife. It was a bit odd, of course, having to wait for your husband to come home when the sun rose, but you had quickly gotten used to waking up early. Afterall, how could you sleep when your lover was out there, fighting for his life everyday to slaughter man-eating demons?
Your routine with the man was simple. He’d go out at night to do his duty and come back when the sun rose, tired but proud of a successful day of slaying demons. And you couldn’t be prouder to be called his wife. The first thing you’d both do when he arrives home is fill his belly with some nice, warm and comforting food before he took you in his arms and slept, recovering from the exhaustion of a long night. And of course, if you’re feeling particularly needy, he’d make love to you before getting some shut eye, your husband often just as desperate for you as you are for him.
But tonight was different.
Tonight, you were not waiting for him with warm food and the promise of good sleep.
Not yet anyway.
You jumped as you heard the telltale sound of your door unlocking just as the sun started to rise.
Never a minute late.
Familiar footsteps padded through the house, each stomp making your body grow hotter. You heard him call out for you; the man clearly confused as to why you didn’t greet him as you usually did. You responded back to him by letting him know you were in the bedroom. As his footsteps got closer, your body grew hotter and hotter and you couldn’t help but jump as the door to the room opened.
Your husband walked in, tall and handsome and oh so muscular, looking adorable with the slight confused expression on his face. “Darling?” he called out.
“H-How was work today?” you asked, wanting to make sure he was alright first.
“It was fine.” Gyomei said, “Nothing I couldn’t handle.”
“Are you hurt?”
“Not even a scratch.”
You let out a sigh of relief. You knew Gyomei was an incredibly strong man but even he wasn’t immune to injury or even death.
“What’s going on, my love?”
“Well, um…” you said, feeling incredibly shy once more as the attention was brought back onto you, “I…wanted to talk to you about something…”
“Yes?” Gyomei asked, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him.
“It’s about…what you said yesterday…”
Gyomei was about to fall asleep, his face resting on your chest as you spoke to him, your voice often comforting him and lulling him into slumber. You were telling him random stories about what you did during the day, talking about a particular story where you were playing with the neighbourhood kids. Right before he was about to fall asleep, arms wrapped tightly around you, you heard Gyomei whisper something:
“I want…a baby…”
“You…You said you wanted a baby.” You reminded, feeling your ears turn red, “and- well- I’d like one too.”
“Oh.” Gyomei said, his hesitation making your blood run cold. Did you misunderstand? Or maybe he thought about it and decided he actually didn’t want kids. Or-
The man brought a hand upto his face and you felt your anxiety melt away as he tried to hide his blushing face but failing to cover up his red ears.
“You didn’t say anything so I thought that you didn’t want to talk about it…” he confessed, “But you’re right. I want to have kids with you.”
You gulped, blushing like a virgin. This was ridiculous! You were married to this man for so long and yet, he still makes you feel like a teenager whose crush smiled in her direction.
“Is that why you were waiting for me here?” Gyomei asked, a hint of a smile on his face, “You want us to get started right away?”
“Well- that’s- um-“ you sputtered, fanning your blushing face, “If you’re not too tired- oh!”
You gasped as Gyomei suddenly grabbed you by the shoulders and pushed, making you fall back onto the mattress. You squealed as your husband crawled onto the bed as well, his tall, hulking figure towering over you. He had already taken off his haori and was just in his uniform which he knew you found attractive on him.
“I can go on for hours more, my love.” He said, a hand coming up to thumb at your lips, “question is, can you?”
~~~~~
“Mmph- ah- fuck- ah!”
Gyomei growled as he lifted his head from where he was buried between your legs, his lips wet from your juices. “Don’t muffle your moans.” He ordered.
“B-But I’m so loud-“ you whined, pushing your hand away from your mouth.
“I know. Be loud for me.”
With that, he lowered his head again, making your squeal as his hot tongue made contact with your pussy once more. Two fingers stuffed inside your dripping hole, he gently fingered you open, preparing you to take his cock. Even after all these years, Gyomei refused to fuck you unless he gave you can orgasm beforehand and making sure your body could take his girth with the least amount of pain. Despite you telling him that you had gotten used to his size, he refused to change the routine and hey, why would you ever complain about that?
He moaned as he drank you up, your taste like a drug to him. Not having the gift of sight enhanced Gyomei’s other senses which meant your taste, your scent, your moans and the feeling of your hot cunt against his mouth were all the more addicting. Shaking his head from side to side, his ran his tongue all over your pussy before settling on your clit.
“Ah! Honey- oh!” you moaned out loud, a hand coming down to grab his hair. You shivered as you felt him growl against you, his lips sealing around your clit before giving it a harsh suck. “Oh fuck- ah- gonna- gonna cum!” you announced, voice high pitched and whiney as he ate you out like you were a delicious meal, his fingers curling just right and teasing your g-spot.
“Cum for me, my love.” Gyomei said, tongue flicking rapidly over your clit, “Cum in my mouth~”
“Ah- yes- yes- oh- cumming!”
With a shout, you climaxed, back arching and toes curling as your orgasm washed over you. Your thighs clamped around Gyomei’s head which the man loved, still eating you out as you rode your orgasm on his fingers and tongue. The room was filled with moans and the sound of slobbering, his cock dripping in his pants as he heart your sweet cries of ‘yes’ and ‘more-‘. Your orgasm tasted like nectar and the sharp pain of you pulling at his hair was addicting. Gyomei truly loved eating you out and he’d do it for hours if you’d let him.
Eventually, you came down from your high, your back colliding with the mattress once more and your legs relaxing. You pushed at Gyomei’s head, a silent plea for him to stop mouthing at your pussy, the man still licking up your juices and thrusting his fingers. With another kiss to your clit, he slowly pulled himself away from your cunt, sitting on his knees and his fingers slowly pulled out of you. You blushed heavily at the squelching sound, your cunt so unbelievably wet that you knew you were staining the sheets.
But your pussy somehow grew wetter when you saw your husbands bulge throb against his pants. Gyomei had already taken his shirt off beforehand, right after he had stripped you naked, and was only clad in his baggy pants that didn’t do nearly enough to hide his erection. You gulped down your drool as you stared, your pussy throbbing for him and your womb aching for his seed.
Gyomei didn’t need his sight to know that you were staring, the man smiling as his hands found their way to his belt. “Are you ready, my love?” he asked as he started to undo the material, groaning as he grew more excited, “Ready for me to put a baby in you?”
“Yes-“ you said with no hesitation, “I’m ready- I need you-“
“And you’ll have me.” Gyomei said, ripping his belt off and tossing it aside before he started to unbutton his pants, “You’ll have all of me.”
You couldn’t help but slide a hand down your body to lightly pat at your pussy, watching as Gyomei stripped completely. He slid his pants and underwear down together and you started to drool as his dick popped out. A long and girthy cock with delicious veins that you loved to trace with your tongue and a pair of heavy, full balls that you always wanted to be drained inside you.
Once he was completely naked, he grabbed you by the back of your thighs and pushed up, pressing your legs against your chest and folding you to his desire. You squeaked at the embarrassing position; your puffy cunt even more exposed that before as he caught you in a mating press.
“Ready?” Gyomei asked, bringing one hand to the base of his cock to slap his dick against your cunt, making the both of you moan from the contact. He started to rub his cock up and down your slit, gliding it between your pussy folds with no resistance, his member getting coated in your juices.
“I’m ready. I’m so ready.” You said, not even caring about how desperate you sounded, “Fuck me- breed me, my Darling.”
Gyomei smiled before he pressed the head of his member against your hole, teasing it a bit before he slowly started pushing in. You whined, tossing your head back against the pillow as you felt the familiar burn of Gyomei stretching your pussy, bullying his way inside you. Your wetness helped as his cockhead popped inside you, already taking your breath away.
Gyomei groaned as he felt your cunt squeeze him, the man never getting tired of this feeling as he continued to push and push and push, burying inch after inch into your sweet pussy. His hand left his dick to once again, press your leg against your chest, keeping you nice and folded for his cock to reach as deep inside you as it could.
Both of you moaned as he finally bottomed out, the man so long and fat that you felt like you couldn’t breathe. His cock always took your breath away- always rendered you speechless. Gyomei was in no better position, your pussy squeezing his dick like a vice and no doubt, he’d have to fight against your hot, velvety walls if he wanted to fuck you silly.
And he was going to fuck you silly.
Making sure you were ready, he used his hold on your legs and leverage as he slowly pulled out before slamming back in, making you scream. The man was immediately kissing your cervix, his cock so, so deep inside you it made your head spin. Again and again and again- Gyomei pulled out and thrust back in, each time getting smoother as your bodies got used to each other.
“Fuck- fuck- yes!” you moaned, eyes rolling to the back of your head at the sensation of your husband fucking you open on his fat cock, “So good- faster darling-“
“As you wish, my love.” Gyomei said, obeying you as he picked up the pace. He grit his teeth as he set a fast rhythm, fucking his cock deep inside you, your wet pussy feeling heavenly against him. He always wanted to have children with you but never found the appropriate time to bring it up. With his past as someone who looked after kids, he still had the desire for a big, happy family. If you were willing, he was ready to breed you over and over and over again, ready and eager to have multiple children with you.
His balls clapped against your pussy, the impact making you tighten around him. Your moans were music to his ears, your fingers digging into the skin on his forearms barely noticeable in comparison to the feeling of your cunt. You babbled out sweet nothings, cries and pleas for more along with words of love for your husband and Gyomei wondered how he got so lucky.
“Oh yes- so big- Darling- so good!” you squealed, toes curling as his cock fucked you mercilessly, the lewd sound of skin slapping against skin filling the air and making you dizzy. The intimacy and love you felt from Gyomei whenever you made love or even fucked like animals made your heart swell. Seeing him above you, sweat marring his handsome face and his sculpted, strong body holding you down as he fucked you- his abs contracting each time he thrust inside you- his strong thighs flexing as he pounded your pussy- the veins on his arms as he pressed your legs down- everything about Gyomei was a work of art and you’d never understand how you got so lucky to be his.
Neither of you paid attention to the time as you continued to fuck with one intention only. Maybe it was half an hour maybe it was two hours- but the both of you reached the edge simultaneously.
“D-Darling-“ you moaned out, voice horse from all the screaming and moaning, “I-I’m close-“
“Me too, my love.” Gyomei groaned out, a deep moan leaving his lips which made your pussy gush, “Fuck-“
Ah, you loved it when you got Gyomei to curse.
“Together-“ you begged, eyebrows furrowed as you watched his cock continue to slam into you, “Let’s cum together!”
Gyomei nodded, putting more force behind his thrusting as he reached as deep as he could go, the familiar knot on his abdomen threatening to break. “Be a good wife and get pregnant for me, ok?”
“Mmhmm!” you hummed, nodding enthusiastically as he picked up the pace, going even faster than before, “P-Put a baby in me, Gyomei! K-knock me up!”
“Anything for you.”
The room was filled with the filthy noise of the two of you desperately fucking, getting each other to reach their climax. His balls slapped against you, his sweat mixing with your own, your bodies craving for release. And finally, finally- you got it.
The two of you moaned as you both climaxed together, the sensation heavenly. You gasped and whined and mewled as your cunt gushed, cumming all around Gyomei’s cock. Your pleasure was fueled by the sensation of your husband unloading inside you, his balls clenching as he pumped rope after rope of his seed deep inside you, flooding your womb with his cum. He held you down, keeping you in place as he milked himself of every drop. He was getting you pregnant, that’s for sure.
Gyomei tossed his head back as he pushed his hips flush against yours, growls of pleasure leaving his lips and pleasure overtook him. His body shivered and his muscles tensed, moaning as your pussy throbbed around him, squeezing him dry which he was more than happy to oblige with. “That’s it- oh yeah- take my cum~” he panted out as he slowly rolled his hips, making sure to get his sperm deep inside you, not taking any chances.
Eventually, when both of you were done cumming and were brought back down to reality, Gyomei leaned down, cock still inside you and kissed you. You moaned and wrapped your arms around him, groaning against his lips as he gently let go of your legs, allowing you to stretch your muscles. But you simply wrapped your legs around his waist, making sure to keep him inside you as your lips danced against his.
“I love you.” He whispered against you as he broke away from you for a second before he kissed you again, tongue massaging your own. You kissed him back just as passionately, conveying your love for him with action rather than words, especially since Gyomei didn’t seem interested in pausing your makeout session even if it was to hear you say you love him.
But you did love him. So very much.
And you figured you could enjoy this moment as the second he allows you to breathe, you’re going to ask him for another round and another load of cum.
#subby writes#kimetsu no yaiba smut#demon slayer smut#kinktober#gyomei smut#himejima gyomei smut#himejima gyomei#kny gyomei#gyomei x reader#gyomei himejima#demon slayer gyomei
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It's been forever since I've posted I'm so sorry I have no reason as to why I just haven't felt like it🧍♂️ anyways I've been obsessed with teacher/student relationships even tho I'm a minor and it's generally wrong...before yall get on my ass I don't encourage this irl and the only reason I rlly like the idea is cuz I was groomed multiple times in the past😭
Teacher x fem student reader
Warnings: teacher student relationship, readers age not specified, cockwarming, cheating, p in v sex, self indulgent, implied manipulation and grooming
M!Teacher who notices your grade slipping so he asks you to meet with him after school so he can help
M!Teacher who's eyes linger on you longer than the rest of his students
M!Teacher who's constantly leaving little touches
M!Teacher who runs his finger through your hair while you confide in him
M!Teacher who calls you the most perfect and beautiful girl when you act insecure
F!Reader who begins to grow attached to her teacher and does everything possible to have his validation
M!Teacher who uses this to his advantage and begins to spend more and more time with you
F!Reader who wears short skirts and low cut blouses just to have her teacher look at her longer
M!Teacher who invites you to his house to help you with school but ends up with his tongue down your throat
F!Reader who's never been loved or touched by man so she spends every moment with him begging for his affection
M!Teacher who switches your class so his free period is right after your class ends
M!Teacher who then keeps you after class during his free period bent over his desk with his cock deep inside your tight walls
M!Teacher who sends you to your next class late with his cum dripping out of you and a note excusing you for being late because he was "helping" you
M!Teacher who keeps you after school so you can cockworm him while talking about your day and interest
M!Teacher who is happily married with kids so you're his "dirty little secret"
F!Reader who felt bad but he reassured her she meant the world to him and the only reason he didn't leave his wife for you was for your safety
M!Teacher who convinces you that know one will ever love you like he does
Ughhh I need this so bad uhmm let me know if you liked this or want me to turn this into an actual story:33
#teacher crush#tc community#teacher x student#student reader#teacher attachment#teacher x reader#teacher love#fem reader#teacher x student reader#i need a teacher to love me#dont actually date your teacher pls#teacher crush community#male teacher x female student#male teacher crush
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