#i don't think people will see this fic the same way after the holy moly au

[grape-jucie-dog]

Holy Moly AU: ANGSTANGSTANGST ATHENA'S GOING THROUGH IT AND EVERYONE IS WORRIED ABOUT HER AND SHE'S COMPLETELY SPIRALING

The "Athena's Trip" fic outside the AU:

(Hera almost lost her shit btw. She doesn't get paid enough to deal with High Athena)

Athena is literally so goofy 😭 I love high Athena (Outside of the Holy Moly AU at least.)

[elreyconducto]

Powers and Food Don't Mix: Part II--Video Angels Don’t Agree with Confectionary

Disclaimer: I do not own Second Son

Rating: T

Warning: language

Words: 3054

Summary:  Continuation of why using your powers on or around food is a bad idea.

Wowie, look who’s back after not writing an infamous fic in years. Hope you guys enjoy it!

(AO3 Link) || (FF.Net Link)

Powers and Food Don’t Mix) Part II: Video Angels Don’t Agree with Confectionary    

     Eugene breathed out a large sigh as he wrung his hands together, staring at the conquest in front of him.

     He could do this.

     He knew he could do this.

     He had done many things more complicated and difficult than this, including training his powers, saving Seattle, and helping Betty with the kids running around the Longhouse when there had been no one else. That had been an incredibly trying day that left him even more drained than if he’d used his powers to charge hundreds of TVs.

     No, no, he was going to have to do this, it was too important to be left alone.

     The challenge sitting in front of him on the counter was in the multiple forms of bowls, mixing spoons, a flexible spatula, a carton of eggs, a gallon of milk, a container of oil, a small container of frosting, a bowl of strawberries, and a box of cake mix. The miscellaneous ingredients loomed on the counter as if they were mocking him, waiting for him to mess something up even before beginning.

     If he could not do anything else today, the one thing that he must accomplish was making a cake for Fetch. It was her birthday, and Eugene wanted to do something special for one of the few important people in his life. Despite getting off to a rocky start when they initially met in Curdun Cay, the Neon Conduit was something that Eugene just could not live without. Thus, he wanted to make this cake very special for her to remind her just how much he cared. She had mentioned through offhand comments whenever they passed a bakery or had something sweet for dinner that she loved strawberry cake as it was not only her favorite flavor, but something she and Brent had shared a delight for as well.

     With that it mind, how could he not make it for her?

      Now, the only…minor problem in his way was that he had never actually baked a cake before. It could not be that hard seeing as how his babysitter had made plenty of treats for him when he was very young since his mother had been away on frequent business trips. The cake box had very simple, clear instructions on it, so Eugene figured he could at least manage to follow them. Even if he were to mess something up by accident, he had over two hours to fix it before his partners got home. Under Eugene’s request to get Fetch out of the apartment for a while, Delsin had taken her out to a showing of Les Misérables at their local theater (with discounted tickets). The two guys had come to realize their girlfriend held a love for plays only matched with her love for books, so the play was a no-brainer.

     Taking a fortifying breath as he rolled up his sleeves, he began to follow the instructions step by step. “First, preheat the oven to 400 degrees…”

     Time flew by, and after messing up the first bowl of batter with an egregious amount of oil, making the batter too runny and goopy, Eugene waited for the correctly mixed version to finish baking in the oven. He glanced at the clock as he was cleaning up the dishes he used. It read two o’clock, which meant that the play should be over in a half hour which in turn gave him an additional half hour until his partners got home. An hour for the cake to finish baking, cool off, and then decorate—nothing he could not handle.

     The batter catastrophe was not the worst thing that had happened, but he was trying to push away the memory of smashed shell-corpses of at least half the carton of eggs he just didn’t have the hand to crack the right way.

     The mushed remains of the few strawberries he attempted to core had also been bleeding out sticky juice on the counter. He had made sure to Google how to core them properly after the failed attempt…

     Just as he rinsed the dish and put in in the drying rack, an alarm chimed form his phone, signaling to him that the cake was done. “I don’t think I could have asked for better timing,” he grinned as he dried his hands and grab two potholders. He turned off the oven and removed the cake, sliding it onto a serving dish then doing the same to the small sample size he had baked as well. (His babysitter had always told him to make a small sample to taste just in case anything went wrong.) He gave it a look-over to make sure there wasn’t anything terrible about it. And, to be fair, he did not think he did a half-bad job!

     But…although it looked fine—minus the slight uneven tilt to one of the corners—the main thing that had to be perfect was the taste.

     It took a minute of swishing his hand over the sample size to get it to cool down, but afterwards it was safe to not burn his mouth. Holding the mini cake in his palm, he swallowed nervously before taking a bite.

     It was…great! In fact, it could have been called delicious, even!

     After finishing what was in his mouth and then the rest in his hand, he heaved the greatest sigh of relief. All the worry that had flooded his body since earlier this afternoon left him in a giant gush and he slumped against the counter. Replacing all the anxious feelings were little thrills of joy and excitement that little flurries of pixels humming around his shoulders. Holy moly, I actually made it taste good! I can’t wait for Fetch and Delsin to get here!

     In order not to mess anything up, he patiently waited for the cake to cool off while he finished cleaning what he had used.

     He would not mess up this cake.

     With about twenty minutes to go until his partners got back, the novice baker began what was widely known to be the most fun part about making desserts: decorating the cake. “Alright, alright, how should I do this?” he muttered to himself with the container of cake frosting in hand. A moment of contemplation passed before he shrugged and grabbed the flexible spatula. He began frosting the cake with the white cream cheese frosting, doing his best to cover every surface. If there had been an outside perspective, they surely would have commented on the complete concentration that was lining his face: brows pinched, eyes squinted behind glasses, tongue poking out of mouth, and shoulders tense.

     Once the cake was frosted—not the best-looking thing as he couldn’t get the surface texture all smooth and pretty like he wanted—he tried making some sort of flower shapes on the top. While he got the dollops somewhat even like he wanted, they did not look like flowers in any way, shape, or form. His stomach twisted and his hands shook a little as he thought of Fetch’s reaction to the poor looking things, Oh no, oh no, they look so baaaad. She’s probably gonna hate it! I already started though, maybe I could redeem it…

    Eugene thought back to the fancy cakes he’d seen in bakery windows and the pictures Fetch linked him on social media. With a new idea in mind, he shoved the frosting to the side and picked up the bowl of correctly cored and halved strawberries. Hearts! He had to make hearts with the fruit! He slowly placed the strawberries on the frosting dollops he had made in order to make them look like hearts. Lastly, he placed the six largest ones in the middle to make three really big heats. Three hearts for the three of them: Fetch, Delsin, and himself.

     He stepped back, taking in his creation.

     He guessed it looked fine…if he subtracted the slightly uneven height, the almost scratchy looking appearance of the icing, and the jaggedly cut strawberries. There was something missing to piece it all together, something that would make it look (mostly) perfect. A memory of the Akomish Days festival flitted in front of his eyes and—

     —Could that work? Could he do that? Delsin’s attempt at ‘helping’ the food last time had made a disaster, but surely Eugene had more finite control than Delsin did. Right?

     Putting the bowl down, he glanced at his hands.

     Then stared at the cake.

     Looked at his hands once again.

     That settle’s it then. He closed his eyes. Concentrating on the hum of his powers within him, he directed the pixels to hover just above the cake. In his mind’s eye, he saw the typical images of his angels, fully armored and intimidatingly powerful, and the pics of cute stuff Fetch liked to send. Twisting his fingers just so, he could see and feel his angels changing into something less frightening and cuter. When he figured he got it right, he opened up his eyes to see three baby versions of his angels hovering over the cake. These angels were the size of half a fist and had much less armor than his regular ones. They watched him with pupil-less blue eyes that glowed behind the helmets that were obscuring their faces.

     He blinked.

     They blinked back.

     I might cry, this is just too adorable. What have I done? It was perfect, then. Just as he was about to give them the order to stay on the cake and behave, he heard the lock turning to the front door of the apartment. “We’re home!” Fetch called out.

     An accompanying voice commented in a low voice, “I smell something sweet. Do you think he bought a new candle or something?”

     The rest of their conversation was drowned out by his panic. “Oh shit!” he hissed as he fumbled for his phone in his pocket. He knew Fetch loved cute pictures of food before it got eaten, so he was quick to snap one before he shoved his phone back into his pants and nearly flew out of the kitchen.

     The sight that he was met with—the one that stopped him right in his tracks—when he entered the living room was something he would never get tired of seeing: the rare occasion that Fetch and Delsin were dressed up, looking like something out of a magazine. The pink-haired women had her hair down and styled to the side, which showed off her glowing face. Her dangling earrings glittered, matching the bracelet that decorated the hand that was on Delsin’s shoulder to keep her balance to remove her black heels. The lavender dress that she wore was something out of season—too thin for the cold weather of February—but looked amazing on her. The shin-length fabric swished around her, giving her an even more vibrant energy.

     The only other person that could have matched her was Delsin, who looked equally stunning as well. Beanie gone for a change, his dark brown hair, that was almost as dark as ink, flowed down and brushed his shoulders. A small braid curved from his temple towards the back of his head, something that Eugene was aware that Fetch did in order to keep his hair out of his face. While he was not wearing brilliant jewelry like Fetch, Delsin’s warm brown eyes and dazzling smile were bright enough to make up for it. The black vest and grey dress shirt hugged his frame, and Eugene tried to ignore just how perfect the muscles of his arms looked as one helped Fetch balance and the other was crooked to hold their jackets. Not only that, but it was just not fair how well the light blue tie looked on him, contrasting against his dark skin and wrapping around his neck, almost as if it was wrapping him up like a present.

     Oh fuck, Eugene had it baaaad.

     “Oh my gosh,” the laughing voice of his girlfriend broke him out of his staring, “I wish you woulda been there, ‘Gene!”

     Delsin added, grinning at him, “I’m with her, but I know you’ve been doing your own thing here, right?” He emphasized his question with a quick wink.

     Lord, he almost forgot the cake with the two models standing in front of him.

     “Y-Yes! Yeah, I was!” He walked toward his partners, giving them each a kiss and Fetch a really squishy hug. “To be truthful, I had Delsin take you out because I wanted to work on my gift for you while you were gone.”

     Pulling back from the embrace, her eyes widened in surprise and then glee. “Ohhh, ‘Gene, you’re such a sweetie! Lemme see it, lemme see it!”

     He and Delsin laughed at her excitement. “Okay, but you have to close your eyes first,” he smiled. Eugene took her hand and began guiding her towards the kitchen and Delsin took that as his cue to cover her eyes. “It’s not the greatest, but—”

     “Oh shut up, Angel Boy,” Fetch interrupted. “Whatever it is, I’m gonna love it because you made it. I know you don’ like doin’ things outta your comfort zone, so I ‘ppreciate it already.”

     Delsin chimed in, “Now with a point like that, I can’t disagree with the lady?”

     With that decided, he stopped at the opening of the kitchen with his back blocking the cake. He wanted to see Fetch’s reaction first. With a nod Delsin removed his hands and Fetch blinked at the light change. Eugene pressed a kissed to her lips again. “Happy birthday,” he grinned as he stepped aside and gestured with his hand like a magician, directing her attention to what was on the kitchen table.

     The silence was not something he was expecting.

     Neither were the faces they were making.

     Now, he knew his dessert was not something that would take one’s breath away, but the almost blank staring at the cake was something that was making him anxious and uncomfortable. Oh no, it probably sucked so much. They probably thought it was horrible.

     “Uhhh, Eugene,” Fetch didn’t take her eyes off what she was staring at but used her hand to turn him. “You sure this is what you wanted to show me?”

     When he turned around, he nearly screamed. In front of him was the cake he so painstakingly spent hours making completely ruined by the mini angels he had created to complete it. One angel was using a tiny sword to cut the strawberries into even smaller pieces. The second angel was digging a hole through the middle of the cake to place itself in, and the last angel was freefalling to make cannonballs as if the cake was a pool. The whole thing that Eugene had worked on was now a pile of mushed cake, smeared frosting, and diced strawberries.

     He was so embarrassed, frustrated, and upset all at the same time. His face was on fire, but he was not sure from which emotion. He gave an angry flick of his hand, dispelling the pixelly troublemakers, before throwing up his hood and pulling the drawstrings to shut out his face. God, just smite me here. “I’m so sorry, Fetch!” he began rambling as he tugged on the drawstrings even tighter. “It was supposed to be a birthday cake for you! It was a strawberry cake since I know that’s your favorite flavor, and I wanted it to be perfect because you deserve it, and now it’s all ruined and you can’t even—”

     He was cut off when fingers gently pulled at the little hole that his hair was puffing out of. He let go of the strings as the opening of the hood came more open to reveal his flushed face. Through damp eyes he saw Fetch smiling at him, and it was then that he felt his brain stop working. “You silly thing. I didn’t lie when I said that I would love anything you made.”

     “…But it’s totally ruined,” he frowned. “It barely looks like a cake anymore.”

     “It may not have the looks, but I’m pretty sure it tastes like one.” The sound of a drawer closing pulled their attention to Delsin who had three spoons in his hand. Walking back to them, he used his arm to drape over their shoulders and guide them towards the table, pulling out the chairs for them to sit. “Now, I’m not expert at baking—that’s all Betty—but from what I have done, I know that taste is a big factor. Let’s not put all your hard work in the trash, yeah?”

     Eugene slumped over the table. “I guess so. If you guys don’t like the taste, I have a pic of what it used to look like if you want to see it.” He fished out his phone and pulled of the photo, showing it to his partners. What was the use, anyway? It didn’t look like that anymore.

 “Oh my god, Eugene! It looks so precious, I love it!”

     “Holy crap, man. You did such a great job!”

     He blinked, straightening up from his slump just a bit. “Really?”

     “Hell yeah!” She beamed as she took a scooped up a big spoonful of the cake mush. “And since the cake is for me, I’ll be the judge of whether or not it tastes good.” With baited breath, they watched as she shoved the entire spoonful into her mouth. A moment later, she gave him the biggest kiss, smearing lipstick and frosting on his cheek. “I love it so much. Thank you, Genie.” With that, she began to shovel even more cake into her mouth without so much as breathing in-between spoonfuls.

     “Hey, hey, wait a minute!” Delsin exclaimed as he lightly whapped his spoon against her bare shoulder. “Stop eating, we haven’t sung Happy Birthday to you, yet! You’re going to mess up all your birthday karma and choke too! Plus leave us some!”

     As he stared at the two of them, Fetch hoarding the cake mush and Delsin trying to get her to stop, Eugene felt a small smile bloom on his face. The cake might have been a semi-disaster, but at least he had this moment with his two favorite people in the world on Fetch’s special day.

Published: 3/6/18

A/N:  Our angel boy is just so damn in love, he has it bad. Someone give him a medal for “Great Boyfriend”