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gachagon · 10 months ago

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This is big spoilers for the commercials in the Awayfrompryingeyes website on the Welcome Home site.

I've been saying since DAY 1 that Eddie Dear was going to be one of the most important Neighbors to pay attention too, aside from Julie, Frank, and Sally. And this update just practically confirmed it, I had this long running suspicion about Eddie Dear, and it's that I think he was one of the first besides Wally to gain sentience in a way.

I know most people believe Wally was the one who "woke" up first essentially and was able to see the reality of what they were actually living in, but I think Eddie Dear was the first of Wally's friends to actually wake up. My reasoning for this is that Eddie's "backstory" on the neighborhood page is so vague and strange compared to the other neighbors. He's the ONLY one who doesn't remember where he came from, and we see routinely throughout these updates that he's kind of the odd man out a lot of the times.

And that's not totally unusual for a kids show, but there's something about Eddie that just points to him being a lot different from the other puppets. Like that he's also the only one who's able to actually tell what time it is, as he's the only neighbor with a real watch.

And he really REALLY wants to fit so badly into the world of Welcome Home that he sticks to his job as a mailman as much as he can. But even looking at his interactions with the others, you can tell he's not quite playing the role he's been set as perfectly.

I don't think Home (the house) had anything to do with Eddie waking up, I actually think it was a combination of Eddie just not being able to mesh well with the part he has to play and the other characters breaking his routine without asking him. The moment that really shakes him is when he can hear the Narrator say "And Eddie Dear was happy." and i think that's because he really doesn't know if he is happy or not. Home is still strange because its obviously the one thing that Eddie fixates on when he first gains sentience, but I don't think its what shook him out of just being a puppet only.

Eddie is also so obviously playing along with the idea of Homewarming and doesn't actually know much about it. But he's not letting the others know this, as when he's alone is when he tells himself to just "focus on the festivities" instead of the other confusing parts of Homewarming. When he's with Poppy decorating the tree (with turkey...? and gravy...?) He just makes it seem like what they're doing is a no brainer, and something everyone does during the holidays.

But when he starts spiraling at the party, all of the things he helped decorate look strange and confusing to him. He can't focus on anything, staring into the wallpaper makes it seem worse, and the fabric of his own reality is literally being ripped at the seams (there's just an excessive amount of video tearing which I equate to Eddie's sense of sanity at the moment and just how present he really is)

It's here that Eddie finally realizes just what they're doing, and what everything really truly looks like. Eddie even tries to focus solely on Frank's face to sort of ground him, but the goddamned credits for the episode itself is playing over Frank's face and obscuring his vision. The scene itself wants to move on but Eddie is still able to see what the audience normally wouldn't be able too, and that split from his reality to ours is what makes him freak out in the end.

#welcome home update #welcome home #happy homewarming #welcome home theory #eddie dear #welcome home spoilers

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tothosewholisten · 7 months ago

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Forever Healed | TUA insert

Chapter: 00

next chapter>>

Masterlist

…

On the 12th hour of the first day of October 1989. 43 women around the world gave birth. This was unusual in the fact that none of these women had been pregnant when the day first began.

Sir Reginald Hargeeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.

He got seven of them, yes seven.

MARCH 21, 2019

I have to be at least somewhat proud of myself for lasting this long. I thought as I sat on the bus, not everyday you are born with magical powers and are destined to save the world from evil. Yes, hearing myself think that sounds crazy. But that's normal in my life.

I had reached my stop after a half an hour of sitting with my earbuds in, listening to nothing at all. I just wanted to seem unapproachable on the sketchy city bus.

My destination was a terribly designed office building, the space was so crammed and ugly it made me want to turn right back around and get on that bus again. But I didn't because I was trying to convince myself that this would be good for me, but I didn't believe my words.

I was about to have a therapy session with some middle-aged white lady who has glasses and tell her all of my life issues, starting every week at 5pm..

It's not like I had anything else going on, I haven't had work for days now. So I thought I'd give it a shot.

The waiting process made me anxious as hell, I finally got the courage to walk up to the front desk and gave the man who sat there my name. And now I have to wait for this lady to get done with some other patient.

I sat on a chair and frowned, like she is really going to be focused on "my" problems and not the 30 other people she sees today.

I swear it was only a second into me zoning out when I heard my name yelled. "Y/n L/n? It's so nice to meet you!" A woman said, when i looked up at her i saw the exact lady i was describing earlier to the closest details.

I let her lead me to a smaller room that looked way better than the lobby. It had two chairs, a water machine, some fidget items and a large window view of the city. Gloria, I learn to be the name of my therapist, asks me to sit with her.

She clears her throat, "I know this is our first session so you may not be the most comfortable sharing details. But I'd like to know a little bit about you if you're okay sharing."

“Well, I’m 29 years old and a home care nurse.” I say slowly. Hearing the words leave my mouth I knew I haven’t amounted to a lot in my years.

"Oh wow, 29? I would've never guessed that Y/n, you don't look a day over 21" Gloria complimented me i give her a tiny smile in return.

I'm not sure why that is, I get that a lot in my working field. Older women saying that they wished they looked as young as me.

"That's a great start for today's session." She smiles, "A little bit me is, you know my name already but I'm 56 years old since Monday. I have 3 children and a cat named Mr. Furball."

I regret what i said earlier because I think I already like Gloria and not just because of Mr. Furball. But the fact that she has a calming sense about her. I find myself listening to what she's saying, and I rarely do that with people nowadays.

"But I would like to hear more about your upbringing, how’d you become the fine young lady you are today?" She says.

Oh, she wants to hear about my childhood. I mean I knew she would ask but so soon, I'm worried about saying anything. So I told her that.

"I'm worried about opening up to someone about my past cause well I've never done it before." I said.

She hands me a cup of water. "That's okay Y/n, we can take it at your pace."

“I grew up in a small house with my mom and dad until I was twelve. When I was scouted by Reginald Hargreeves because of my unique abilities. And I've been there ever since I was 18 when I moved out to live on my own.” I waited for the burst of confusion I was about to get from Gloria. Not everyday one of the Umbrella Academy walks into your office.

“Oh wow��” she says, eyes wide. “You're one of those superheroes? That’s amazing wow.” She nervously chuckles “I’m sorry I’m normally not this shocked about things, and I hear a lot on the daily.”

“It’s okay” I say, staring at my hands.

She clears her throat. “I'm sure being apart of the Umbrella Academy was big but could you tell me about your life before that?”

I closed my eyes for a couple of seconds, pictured my childhood in my brain and opened my mouth.

"Well, I'm sure to this day my father still thinks that my mother cheated on him, due to his "daughter's" virgin Mary-like creation since they were just newlyweds. He held it against my mother all of her life." I took a sip of water and continued.

"I'm not sure why he turned to alcohol. But that turned out as you could expect. He turned on everyone around him and acted like a beast. He regularly attacked my mom for anything she did wrong. But what made him more angry was that his freak of a daughter could heal her mother, after every beating."

"My mom told me before I left I had made her so much happier and in her words. She didn't even question these strange occurrences; she knew her baby was special." I smiled a bit.

I could tell that Gloria was painting a picture in her head of what I was describing too.

"And by the age of 8, I was standing up to my father, even if it didn't end so well. I'd get the beating instead but by the next day, my bloody body would be as good as new. On the surface at least, I had lots of internal issues from that time. But none of that stopped my father from trying to get equal with me.." I stopped talking after that.

My eyes could only focus on my right hand as it was picking at my left hand's skin. It was a habit I picked up as soon as I started to use my powers because I knew my skin would be right back to normal in the next few minutes.

"That's awful y/n I'm so sorry." She frowned. "Would you be okay with continuing?"

I blink up at her. “Yes, that would be okay,” I said. “Then there was this one day..”

17 YEARS AGO

“In five, four, three, two. This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for channel 2 News outside of the Capital West Bank at Main and Sixth. A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago and took an unknown number of hostages.”

That was the big news update of September 2002, I remember. Well I don’t really have to think about it much because I was there with my mom at the bank. She planned on making some deposit when we were screamed at, not to leave by a man who had his gun pointed at us along with so many other civilians. He taped us up and told us to stand in a corner.

That was the first and only time I feared for my life. Police didn’t want them to start shooting, so they didn’t come into the building. Meaning that we were on our own and could die at anytime

One of the armed men walks into the scene unfolding. Sirens blaring, people getting shoved around and threats being made to the innocent.

“Now you’ve put me in a position where I gotta do something I don't want to do. Hmm?” He said talking to another person on his walkie talkie.

My mom brought me closer to her trying to use her body as a shield if things went south. And to us we thought they were about to be.

But strangely, a girl walked up to the man. She’d looked to be around my age in a school uniform and cartoon mask. Her loose curls bounced in the wind as she skipped up to him.

“Shit!” He screams putting his device down. Not noticing the girl until a few seconds after his outburst. “Hey, get back with the others.” He told her, trying to sound intimidating but she didn’t seem to fear him at all.

“I heard a rumor.” She spoke out.

He bent a little to reach her height and get in her face. “What? What did you say?”

She leaned in and cupped her hand to mimic whispering in his ear but loud enough for all of us to hear. “I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot.”

Without any hesitation he did what she commanded and shot the nearest armed man who happened to be trying to rough up my mom. We screamed as he kept shooting.

“We just heard shots from inside the bank. It’s uncertain if any hostages have been harmed in that.”

“There’s some movement on the roof. Possibly law enforcement.”

A loud crash and a boy landed down from the roof. It was crazy he wasn’t harmed at all from that high distance. He was also wearing the same mask and uniform as the girl but he had blond hair. From where he landed he jumped on one of the robbers and started beating him to a pulp, and then throwing him out a glass window.

“Looks like one of the armed robbers had been thrown from the bank.”

Another boy with brown hair runs in from the opposite doors as the girl and yells. “Guns are for sissies. Real men throw knives.” He then threw one of his knives and it curved in the air hitting a robber no where close to where the knife had originally been heading. It was incredible.

“I've been in many hostage situations like this, and it can escalate very quickly.”

The original man hops on a table pointing his gun out at the two of the before seen children plus another one. “Get back you freaks” he says walking back and forth in fear.

“Hey, be careful up there, buddy.” The knife boy calls out.

“Get back now!” The man screams.

“Yeah, I wouldn't want you to get hurt.” The girls mocking voice says.

Right before my eyes another boy teleports behind the man, sitting criss-cross on the table. “Or what?” He said calmly.

The man turns around and shoots at him but before the bullets could hit he teleports again. This time standing up with his arms crossed, clearly not impressed. But the man tries to shoot again.

“Ooh! That’s one badass stapler!” The boy laughs. The man no longer had a gun anymore but a stapler placed in his hand by the kid instead. The boy shoves the stapler into his face and the big man falls back, head hitting the floor before his body does.

“Although there’s been no activity for a few minutes, we’re gonna stay live on location to make sure we don’t miss a thing. In this hostage situation at the Capital West bank.”

The five already counted for children make way for the last and shortest one to make his move. “Do we really need to do this?” He talks quietly.

The blonde one replies to him. “Come on, Ben. There’s more guys in the vault.” So his name was Ben huh?

Ben sighs, “I didn't sign up for this.” Before walking into the room with more people. Large black tendrils illuminated the room as men screaming could be heard behind the door. And a beast roars but then the sound stops and Ben walks out again, this time covered in blood and guts.

He breathes heavily. “Can we go home now?” I felt bad for him.

The kids untied our hands and told us to run. And once it was clear to go my mom started to run out of the doors thinking I was right behind her.

“Now we see the hostages. They— They’re free. They’re scared clearly but they do seem to be unharmed.”

But I was behind her trying to help this older woman who’d slipped on the floor. As I was helping her, the kids walked out too.

“People are coming out now. It’s not the armed robbers. These are schoolchildren in uniforms with masks on. Jim Hellerman, Channel 2 News.”

But there was one not accounted for robber, the one from earlier who had been shot in the foot. I started to run out and call out to my mom who was outside. When the man got up from the floor, cocked his gun and shot at the kids.

Fortunately, he missed them but the bullet hit me.

Questions being asked to the children stopped when they saw my body flail onto the floor outside of the bank doors. I was shot right in the chest. There was blood everywhere and it started to leak over to where the kids were standing. They turned around to see where it was coming from..

Everyone looked horrified and there was a bunch of screaming. Mainly from my mother who was wailing as she ran over to hold me to her chest screaming for me to wake up. And that will be engraved in my memory forever after this day, I never wanted to hear her like this ever again.

Police started to rush over but in a matter of minutes, a miracle seemed to happen. At least to the city that is. There was a yellowish glow around my chest and the blood seemed to have reversed back into my body. Even the stains on my blue dress were gone. The bullet even spit out of my chest; it was truly witchcraft.

My eyes then shot open as I started to breathe in and out.

I don't exactly remember what I felt during those moments but I'm sure I left those people around me stunned. After all this was their first look at powers.

I couldn't care what the paramedics were talking about above my body. I was focused on the 6 children looking at me bewildered as well as the old-looking man with them and whatever my mom was saying at the time.

I was put on a stretcher and rushed to a hospital for evaluations after the pandemics came but they never found anything. It was like everything was perfectly reattached.

But as I was leaving I could see the news reporters zeroing in on the kids trying to get the details on how these children saved the bank from thievery.

“Our world is changing.” The man spoke to the crowd. “Has changed. There are some among us gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary.” He said looking back at the children. But they weren’t paying attention, some were staring at my ambulance and some eyes were on the ground.

“I have adopted seven such children. I give you the inaugural class of the Umbrella Academy.”

I now realize thinking back, the seventh person he was talking about was me..

PRESENT DAY

My mouth felt like it was moving faster than my brain so I took a pause and chugged the rest of my water cup.

Once again Glorias eyes were wide open. As she took some notes down in a notebook I never noticed beyond this point.

"Uh once I got home I remember the house phone noise filled my house with its nonstop ring, the other person on the phone would change my life forever when he came in.”

“And who was that person?" Gloria asked.

"Reginald Hargeeves, eccentric billionaire and caring father from what the public knew.." I rolled my eyes.

"So I'm guessing it wasn't really like that" she asked carefully.

"He was never a father really, more like a hard state-national basketball coach." She wrote that down.

"I guess it was a hard decision for my parents to make well, my mother. My father was ready to give me up as soon as Reginald stepped foot in my small house."

"And I'm sure they thought there was nothing bad about the offer they were given, he promised I'd be raised in a steady environment with the best schooling and my powers would be used for the greater good. And in exchange, my parents would get a large sum of money for my absence."

"What were you doing during this?" Gloria worried.

"I think I was just sitting right there next to my mom actually. I definitely didn't understand at that point what was happening to me. Still thinking about the events of that day.”

"And then I was being taken out of my only home in the blink of an eye. I resisted the people taking me, starting with screaming and then kicking and then running. Back to my mom's arms, Reginald himself had to pull me away from her. The deal had already been struck and there was no taking me back."

Now looking back at my hands I could only see small teardrops on my palms. Gloria reached for a tissue from the other side of the room. "Thank you," I said as I wiped my eyes.

"I like to think that my mom was upset that day but the memory has already started to fade as I reached adulthood.

You know after that day I was no longer 'Y/n L/n' no, I was known by my new name.. Zero Hargeeves."

I decided that was the end of my story, at least for now because I couldn't place the pieces together anymore. I was full-on sobbing at that point.

Gloria decided to bring up something more light to talk about next but I don't remember what it was because I'd zoned out and thought about the cat she'd told me about earlier.

The two hours seemed to fly by because the last thing I heard her say was if I didn't have anything else to talk about then that would be the end of the session. My legs seemed to move on their own as I walked out of that building. I would come back at the same time next week and honestly, I think therapy was for the best. I forgot about how I felt about all these things for the longest time.

I started the journey back to the bus stop, stopping to look in the windows of shops.

Shops like bakeries and bookstores and other things like that. Until I came to a stop in front of a store with a TV sticking out in the window.

My eyes scanned the screen and they went wide. The lady on the news had a somber expression as someone died. I was feeling sad for the person's family, but then I read the red-blaring headline.

The person who died was Reginald Hargeeves...

...

Aug 14 update:

If you'd like to be added to the tag list for rest of the series (starts at chapter 10) say taglist in the comments!

#ben hargreeves x reader #the umbrella academy x reader #tua x reader #klaus hargreeves x reader #klaus hargreeves #viktor hargreeves x reader #five hargreeves x reader #diego hargreeves x reader #five hargreeves #vanya hargreeves x reader #vanya hargreeves #viktor hargreeves #ben hargreeves #x reader #allison hargreeves x reader #allison hargreeves

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laroserie · 11 months ago

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— characters : Alastor, + the hotels residents (vague mention - expect for Charlie)

— content : x gender neutral reader - reader is a baker, reader is naive (for a sinner), Alastor manipulate reader into coming to the hotel, Alastor is Alastor but he's also OOC (kinda but uh who write canon Alastor anyways)

— author note : this is the second part of an (potentially yandere!) alastor x baker reader - the first part is here (also the words count is : 1.7k ) (saying that because i outdid myself lol) (also yes i know Alastor canonically do not like tea idc this mf is gonna drink tea) ++ honestly considering doing a third part because I have so much more to say and write about this

After Alastor came back from his seven years hiatus and he came for at your bakery again, he could come so often, like once every two days.

But it could take him a while to make a 'move', try to get closer to you or talk to you about the hotel but one day, he comes to your bakery and asks for an unusual amount of pastries. You don't comment on it as it's not your place - you are just a simple baker ! But you can't help but raise an eyebrow.

Alastor meant to talk to you about the hotel, not because he wanted you to reedem yourself or because he wanted to do it for Charlie - well maybe a little but he won't admit it - but more or less to keep an eye on you. By then, he isn't sure as to why he wants to keep an eye on you - his assumption is that he feels the same way toward you as he does toward Rosie. He sees you as a friend but not quite - you are the sweet baker who makes quite good pastries and you are by far one of the less annoying sinners he ever spoke to. But he feels some kind of protectiveness over you - probably because he sees you as quite meek and weak.

So obvious what could be better than inviting you to stay at the hotel ? A place where he can both protect and keep on eye on you at -nearly- all time.

Alastor took this opportunity, 'These aren't all for me, dear. They are for ... my friends ?' he started while you were wrapping up what he purchased, 'You see ... Have you heard of the Hazbin Hotel ?' he asks.

'Uhm ... The hotel run by the princess ? Yeah I've seen a bit of talk about it, why ?'

'Well ! I am the facility manager of that, hotel ! And the ... pastries are for my fellows workers and residents.' He stopped for a second to gauge your reaction to that information - which was a simple nod and a 'ohh' - he continued. 'Hm, the goal of the hotel is to help sinners redeem themselves ... could you be by chance interested ?'

This question probably takes you by surprise. By then you already finished packing Alastor order - you push it toward him on the counter. You respond hesitantly 'Ha, well ... Is it possible ? To even redeem yourself ... ?' Your smile falter a bit and you look in the void for a bit. 'I don't think redemption is for me ... If I'm here it mean I deserve it and that it's already too late ...' Alastor didn't fully expect you to react like this - he did expect that you could say 'no' at first but not that.

'But ! Anyways, there is your order, enjoy !' You said trying to end the conversation there. But alas Alastor was not the type to give up so easily.

He took his order but continued on, 'If you couldn't mind dear, please just come and visit once, to be truthful, we haven't had a whole lot of sinners coming, you just simply visiting could be wonderful, and you could help bring Charlie mood up, oh and you both could get along so well !' As he finished his sentence he turned and walked toward the door and threw you a 'Goodbye!'.

Alastor knew you enough to know that he could pull at your heart strings to get what he wanted - you were always the sensitive type, the type to care even about strangers. He was sure that he could see you 'visit' in the near future.

And well he was right ! A mere three days after you found yourself at the doorstep of the hotel. You had been waiting for a few minutes already - you were still debating on entering or just turning on your hells and going back home.

But before you could do anything the hotel door in front of you opened in a big 'slam'. And once again before you could do anything, you were dragged into the hotel in a very enthusiastic manner.

'Hello !! Are you interested in the hotel ?' A cheerful voice asked you, as she dragged you into the hall, you recognised quite easily who is was - the owner of the hotel - Charlie Morningstar. It wasn't your first time seeing her, but it was your first time seeing her up close. You had to restrain a laugh at her over-enthusiasm, you didn't want be irrespectful toward the princess of hell.

'Good morning, I am simply visiting as it was recommended by ... a friend of mine.' You saw her be a bit disappointed hearing that. 'Oh. Is there anyways you could I don't know change your mind ? Maaaaybe ?' She asked.

You a small smile appeared on your face 'Maybe. If your convincing is good enough.'

Charlie took it as a challenge, she started by showing you around the hotel, and then made you meet the residents - you spoke a bit with everyone - at the exception of Alastor how was visiting his friend in Cannibal Town. To say you were surprised knowing that the two sole residents of the hotel were one of the biggest pornstar of hell and somekind of mad inventor could be an understatement. The staff of the hotel was also something - you knew already Niffty and Husk having heard about them from Alastor and you saw and spoke with Husk a few times when he picked up orders at your bakery for Alastor. And then there was Vaggie, she seemed to be quite suspicious of you and it feel like she could gut you out as soon as you do something wrong.

By the end of the day, Charlie asked you once again if you wanted to join the hotel - you struggled to answer her - a part of you seriously started to consider joining the hotel and trying to get redeem but the other one was still wary of the idea.

But you asked her if you could come every once in a while to visit and she was overjoyed by it - you didn't join the hotel but it was still an advances to have someone visit the hotel.

You did end up visiting the hotel a lot - at some point you could come once a week - you ended up befriending most people from the hotel.

One of those day, most of the hotel residents were out - only Alastor and Niffty were at the hotel. Niffty was running around chasing cockroachs - you were having tea with Alastor.

Alastor had finally decided to move to the next steps of his plan - to have you under his grip. He started by asking you a few questions about how you felt about the hotel.

'I told you, you could get along with Charlie !' You nodded as you sipped on a cup of tea. 'Are you thinking of joining the hotel officially ?' You sighed and shake your head, 'Alastor, you already know my answer ...'

'Are you sure dear ? I truly think it could be beneficial for you to join.' He persisted. 'But, I have a bakery to run, I, I have responsibility.'

'You can continue to run your bakery while being a resident here darling ! Honestly, why don't you want to ? Please don't tell me you seriously believe you cannot be redeem, we all know that it's not true. You by far one of the most ... redeemable sinner there is' Alastor tone of voice was serious - the atmosphere shifted and suddenly the way you were sitting became uncomfortable. 'Alastor please ... Don't.' You managed to utter, your looked down at the cup between your hands.

'What, I am simply saying the truth. I am just asking you to enlighten me as to why you don't think you should at least try to redeem yourself and join heaven.' You looked up to see Alastor with his usual smile plastered on his face - it felt wrong, you felt yourself crack. 'There is no real reasons to be frank, I just know that it's not possible, that it's not right ...'

Alastor shacks his head, 'If you don't do it for yourself please do it for Charlie, you both are dear friends now right ? Couldn't you like to make her happy by becoming a resident and attempting to cleanse yourself of your sins ? Ah, it could even make me happy ...' He pulled out the last card in his deck - once again he knew that playing with your feelings could be the easiest way to get you to stay - and so he did.

He could see you hesitate a bit, 'Are you sure ...? What if she learn that I don't believe in it truly ? I do not wish to be hypocritical ... isn't that a sin itself ?' Alastor laughed a little hearing you, 'You shouldn't worry about that darling. The important thing is the end result - not how you got it. Who cares if you aren't honest ? And if it's stay between the two of us, Charlie will never know.' You took a few minutes to think - weighting the pros and cons.

You sighed and nodded your head, 'Sure, I mean what could go wrong ... ha.'. Alastor smiles 'Exactly dear !', he took a sip of tea, 'Now, shall we do the paperwork now ?', he didn't wait for an answer and just pulled out a stack of papers and a pen out of Satan know here and slided them toward you.

You didn't brother to question him and just took the pen in hand, 'Do I really need to read all of that ?' you said pointing to the small toward of papers in front of you, 'Oh of course no, it's just good 'ol paperwork, you don't need to read anything ! Just sign the bottom of each pages and ... we should be good.' you probably didn't notice the way his smiles twisted as he uttered those words or if you did you just preferred to not question it.

Looking back you probably should have - it could have saved you from the collar and leash attached to your neck and the overall pain that was having your soul being owned by Alastor - with the added layer of being a full time resident of the hotel.

#a magic piece ?#hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel imagine #alastor imagine #hazbin imagine #hazbin hotel headcanon #alastor headcanons #hazbin headcanons #hazbin hotel x you #alastor x you #hazbin x you #alastor smut #hazbin x reader #hazbin hotel #alastor

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half-oz-eddie · 1 year ago

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After moving out of Neil's, Billy is unsettled by the peace and quiet in Steve's house. He stares at the door, waiting for it to swing open, expecting to be screamed at over everything.

He's constantly on edge and critical of himself from the day he moved in.

When Steve comes home from work, he asks Billy if he did the dishes, to which Billy replies about how he'd forgotten, explaining how tired he'd been feeling.

"It's no big deal, babe. We'll do them together later?" And then Steve orders them some takeout.

Billy's still waiting for the consequences of his shortcoming for the entire night, like a calm before the storm, but Steve never brings it up again. They do the dishes together, they cuddle, Steve whispers in his hair how much he loves him and missed him all day.

A week later, Billy forgets to finish an Amazon order for Steve. The lack of sleep and unusual amounts of stress have him jittery and forgetful. He remembers the moment Steve walks through the door.

Steve walks in to greet him, noticing how the color is flushed from Billy's face and his eyes are sunken.

"Hey, you okay?"

"I uh...I forgot to finish the Amazon order."

"Oh, shit, I kinda forgot about that too. No problem, we'll finish the order later. I think we need something else too." And Steve walks off. "I'm in the mood for some chicken wings, what about you?" He changes the subject.

Billy just doesn't understand what's happening.

A few more days pass, and Billy is unable to sleep. Steve can feel him tossing and turning and pulls Billy into his arms.

"Having trouble sleeping?"

"Yeah." Billy mumbled. "I've...been fucking up a lot, right?"

"Fucking up what? Did you do something wrong?"

"Yeah. I forgot the dishes, and the Amazon order..."

"Those aren't fuck-ups, baby. Just little accidents. You're working, I'm working...things happen."

"But why aren't you angry at me?"

"Because that doesn't make me angry. You barely make me mad anymore. We haven't fought in months."

"Because I'm scared to lose you."

Steve sighed. "You don't have to walk on eggshells with me, Billy. I'm not a monster. I'm not gonna walk away over some bowls or a shopping cart, okay? Trust me a little more."

"I trust you, it's just...I'm always doing something wrong."

"You make me happy. You do plenty right in my eyes."

"Maybe you have your eyes closed most of the time."

Steve laughed, nudging Billy. "Shut up. Be a little nicer to yourself, yeah? You're the love of my life. I don't think you're a fuck-up at all."

For the first time in weeks, Billy was able to relax and eventually get a good night's rest.

He was slowly learning to be kinder to himself.

#ivy.doc #caliscoops.doc

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penny-anna · 1 year ago

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i bought a flat this week.

was off work sick last thursday/friday with what turned out to be the beginnings of a bad cold but at the time i was just like 'oh no why am i so tired is this the return of the Mystery Fatigue'

let's backtrack for a second!! back when i had the offer accepted on my flat my solicitor suggested october 6th as a move in date and i was like sure that works (this was around the beginning of september). then i didn't hear anything from them for many days and then i started getting major dry eye problems that became all consuming so i didn't get around to chasing them.

anyway!! tuesday last week i get an email from my solicitor like 'hi are you still able to complete friday' and i did not have the headspace to deal with it so i didn't reply

Wednesday my solicitor calls like 'hi. we need to know if you want to complete friday'. i'm like 'actually i'm really not feeling well this week, could we postpone'. she calls back a few minutes later like 'they cannot postone'. at this point i'm still thinking that if i get a decent night's sleep i'll feel better so i tell her i'll deal with it in the morning.

Thursday i feel spectacularly worse. have to get up to go to an appointment with my optometrist. almost start crying in their office bcos i'm just so exhausted. (he seemed weirdly unfazed by this?? looking back i wonder if he thought my eyes were hurting or something and didn't realise that i was holding back tears gfhglj) call out sick from work.

plan is to take a nap and then look at the documents my solicitor sent over but she calls me again like 'hi. sorry to bother you i know you're sick but can we complete today' so i'm like ah shit ig we're doing this now. please walk me through exactly what you need me to do here. 'we just need you to send us the money'. yeah i can do that. i've never made a payment this big before tho.

(i'm buying w money inherited from my mother so even for a flat purchase it's an unusually large amount of money)

'oh yeah you won't be able to that online. *pause* are you well enough to go to the bank?' i am tired enough that going to the bank will suck but not so sick i cannot go to the bank.

i had gone fully back to bed. spurred on by sudden wave of adrenaline, get out of bed and dressed and get the bus into town to the bank.

my bank closes at 3pm weekdays and by the time i get that it's about 1:45. explain the situation. turns out that to make a payment this big you need a sit-down meeting with a member of staff and they are booked solid till 3. 'can you come back tomorrow at 9:30 when we open' *dying inside* yes. i can come back tomorrow at 9:30.

go home. remember that i'd told my manager that i'd call her at 9 to let her know if i'm going to be working (i will defo not be working & she knows this) which will be tricky if i have to leave at 9 to go to the bank. have a pretty interminable IM conversation via microsoft teams about this wherein i suggest i message her first thing and call a bit later and she isn't going for it. eventually agree to call at 9 just so i can end the conversation and go to sleep.

Friday morning end up calling my manager from the bus. get to bank. whole thing takes a full 30 minutes so yeah i can see why they couldn't fit me in thursday afternoon ghfdljkfhdj. i'm so so tired. they have to go over a whole fraud prevention statement with you. 'you should be aware that scammers can pretend to be your solicitor'. me, exhausted: okay what if just this one time. a scammer is pretending to be my solicitor.

make the payment. go home to sleep finally.

later in the afternoon get another call from the solicitor. 'hi we have the keys you can come get them whenever'. oh yeah i'd been so caught up in trying to get them the money i'd kinda forgotten about. actually getting the flat.

(side note at no point was i planning to move in on 'moving day', an advantage of being a first time buyer is that i don't have to & i want to redecorate the place which is easier while it's empty)

initially say i'll come in next week but then realise that ideally next week i'll be back at work (i am not but anyway) so i might as well go now. it's pushing 4pm so will need to head out ASAP.

eyes are very dry and itchy from sleeping all day but fortunately i just (on a recommendation from my optometrist) bought a thing called a facial sauna which is a very weird contraption but does work extremely quickly.

pack my eye drops and also a peanut butter sandwich to eat in my new flat (why not) and go get the keys.

arrive at the flat. on inspection realise that the envelope i've been given seems to contain the most random assortment of loose keys. eventually identify an actual set of keys.

put my key in the lock of the flat door. abruptly hear a cat meowing, somewhere very close by.

previous owner had cats (plural) (i know this bcos i saw them when i was viewing the place). have a sudden moment of panic that i've somehow wildly misunderstood the whole situation and that she and her cats are still in residence.

look down. there is a very large, very fluffy white cat standing next to me, looking up at me as if expecting to be let in.

'you can't come in. this is my house.'

make my first mistake: think that if i open the door i will be able to prevent the cat from entering.

cat goes straight on into my flat.

i'm now pursuing the cat from room to room saying 'hey! hey you can't be in here! this is my house!'. the cat doesn't give a shit for obvious reasons (it is a cat)

i might have considered just shooing the cat outside and shutting the door but have arrived at an IMO not unreasonable concern. cat seemed very determined to enter this flat in particular and is now roaming around as if looking for something. previous owner had multiple cats and moved out AFAIK today. i have heard stories about people accidentally leaving cats behind when they move.

at this point it's 4:55 on a Friday. call my solicitor and explain the situation. ask if she could pass on a message to the seller's solicitor. unfortunately they have already closed for the week so it will have to wait till Monday but she will do her best.

decide the next course of action is to see if the cat has any ID. the cat is wearing a harness & collar so might have a tag with an address. make my second mistake: pick the cat up.

the cat does not have any ID on the harness. the cat does NOT like being picked up. cat gets very squirmy and then begins scratching me. cat manages to break my skin through a hoodie.

i put the cat down. the cat hisses at me. this is very rude considering that it is in my house.

head across the landing to see if the people opposite are missing a cat or, failing that, know their neighbours well enough to recognise the cat. there's no answer.

however!! i hear a voice down in the stairwell that sounds like it could be someone calling out a cat's name. 'hi!! is someone down there looking for a cat?' no answer.

look down the stairwell. on the ground floor there is a very large fluffy brown cat wearing a harness. !!!!! that is my cat's friend!

retrieve the cat from my flat (fortunately it just follows me out) and head downstairs. am met partway up by the cat's owner.

'oh thank god is this your cat'. it is her cat. apparently she had opened her front door to let them out into the garden and it had wandered off. 'i just moved in today it came into my flat'.

she is very apologetic. cat is unrepetent.

go back inside. call my solicitor's office. 'hi was it you i spoke to just now about the cat' (I told 2 people about the cat) 'no i just answered the phone because it was ringing. what cat.' 'can you tell *solicitor's name* that i have found the cat's owner. she will know what you mean'.

problem solved!! time to eat my peanut butter sandwich. :)

#long post

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princesssarisa · 10 months ago

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I'm now reading Heidi Anne Heiner's book Cinderella Tales From Around the World. Hopefully it will make me as knowledgable about those stories as that inescapable old post of mine has probably made people think I am.

The different Cinderella stories are arranged in geographical order. So far I've read all the variants from Egypt, Greece, and Italy, and I'm about to start reading the German versions.

For now, I'll share the most interesting points from the versions I've read so far:

*Not all versions of the tale feature a stepmother and stepsisters. The Egyptian variants don't have any parents in them at all. In the proto-Cinderella story of Rhodopis, the title character is just a Greek slave-turned-courtesan with no family, while the other Egyptian tale, The Magic Jar, just has three sisters living together. Meanwhile, the Greek versions usually give the heroine a loving mother and two cruel biological sisters, with no father. In the Italian versions, there's almost always a father, but it varies whether the wicked women are the heroine's stepmother and stepsisters, or her own mother and sisters, or just two sisters with no mother.

*Greek versions typically have the heroine living with her mother and two older sisters. The sisters murder their mother, then cook and eat her flesh, but the grieving heroine lays her mother's bones to rest in a place of honor. Forty days later, the bones turn into three beautiful dresses and other finery and riches for her.

*Italian versions tend to come in two variants.

***One variant uses the archetypal "heroine's father goes on a journey" scenario, much like the Grimms' Aschenputtel or Beauty and the Beast. When he asks his daughters/stepdaughters for gift requests, the sisters want clothes, but the heroine asks for something unusual (e.g. a bird or a tree sapling), or else she asks him just to greet someone for her (e.g. a fairy, or a far-away relative), and when he does, that person gives him a tiny gift for her. Either way, the gift he brings back is what produces her finery.

***In the other variant, the heroine's stepmother or mother sends her out every day to pasture an animal (a cow, a sheep, or a goat), along with an impossible amount of spinning, weaving, or sewing to do. The animal tells the girl to place her work on its horns, and when she does so, it's magically done. Eventually, the (step)mother finds out and has the animal killed, but the heroine saves either the animal's bones or a golden ball she finds inside its body, and from there she gets her finery.

***That said, a few Italian versions include a fairy godmother-like figure: a kind old woman or a fairy who meets the heroine when she's out in the pasture and gives her a magic wand.

*In Italian versions with a stepmother as the villain, she typically starts out as the heroine's teacher or governess. She treats her kindly then, and urges the girl to convince her father to marry her, which she does. But after the marriage she turns cruel. (Some Italian versions of Snow White also begin this way.)

*Another detail from the Italian versions: in the "father goes on a journey" variants, the heroine warns her father that if he forgets her request, then his ship or his horse won't be able to move either forward or backward. He forgets, and sure enough, his ship or his horse freezes in place until he remembers.

*In the Greek versions, the special event the heroine attends in her magic finery is typically a Sunday church service. Some Italian versions have her go to church too, while others have a royal ball or festival, as does Egypt's The Magic Jar.

*In The Magic Jar, the heroine loses a bracelet instead of a shoe. I wonder if Gioachino Rossini and Jacopo Feretti knew about that version when they replaced the slipper with a bracelet for the sake of "propriety" in the opera La Cenerentola?

*In nearly all these versions, the heroine already has her magic source of finery and knows what it can do before the ball/church. So at no point does she beg to go, or cry because she thinks she can't go. She just lets her (step)family leave, then magically dresses herself.

*In both Greek and Italian versions, there are typically three balls or church services. Each time the heroine leaves, the prince has his servants chase after her. But the cunning heroine throws gold coins or jewels behind her, and the servants scramble to pick them up, letting her escape. Sometimes instead, or when she runs out of riches, she throws sand in their eyes to blind them. In a few versions, she doesn't lose her shoe by accident, but throws it to distract the servants because she has nothing else left to throw.

*Very rarely in any of these versions do the heroine and her prince actively "fall in love." They're not described as dancing together the way they do in the familiar Perrault and Grimm versions. The prince just sees her and falls in love with her beauty, with no mention of whether she ever speaks to him or not.

*In all three of these cultures, some versions continue after the heroine's marriage in the vein of the Grimms' Brother and Sister. The (step)mother and (step)sisters turn the newlywed heroine into a bird, or throw her into a river when she's weak from childbirth, or find some other way to get rid of her. But somehow or other she comes back to her husband in the end.

*The fate of the (step)mother and (step)sisters varies. In some versions, namely the ones where they try to get rid of the heroine after her wedding, they're executed. In some Italian versions that have just one stepsister, the stepmother puts the heroine in a pot or a barrel and plans to fill it with boiling water to kill her, but somehow or other she escapes and the stepsister takes her place, so the stepmother accidentally boils her own daughter to death. But in others, they're just left with their envy, and in still others, the heroine forgives them and shares her wealth with them.

I'll share more about different countries' variants as I read them!

@adarkrainbow, @ariel-seagull-wings, @themousefromfantasyland

#cinderella #fairy tale #variations #egypt #greece #italy #cinderella tales from around the world #heidi anne heiner #tw: murder #tw: cannibalism #tw: violence

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he-goes-down · 1 year ago

Text

There Was A Time:

previous chapters/warnings

6. You Ain’t The First

Second person POV:

That Friday the band had a gig. You did the usual; help the boys tease their hair, this was the only time you could be near Izzy or touch him, you helped Slash with his eyeliner and Axl's eyeshadow. They went on stage you watched them from a secret balcony opposite the stage, where all the lights and other technical controls were. You watched Steven's hair bounce as he played the drums, and it was even more hypnotising with his teased hair. You watched him for the beginning of the gig, it soon trailed over to Axl. You knew it was bad that you had feelings for him, even worse that you kissed him. You're his manager, you couldn't be with him, just like nothing could happen between you and Duff. But my god he is so addictive to look at. His teased hair made him look like a lion, and the way he moved his hips when he sang made all the girls, the boys and yourself go absolutely wild. You did however look away from him when it was Slash's solo. Duff and Izzy were looking at you while he shredded, you didn't notice of course as you were in awe at his talent and his man boobs. Duff was jealous, but he wasn't hateful, he knew Slash was amazing at going nuts on the guitar, he stared too sometimes. Izzy however, no one knew what he was thinking. Murder? Maybe. Toe hair? I don't know. Unicorns shitting glitter? Sure! He was so hard to read, he was a complete mystery.

The rest of the show went well. Axl didn't jump on anyone or even shout at them. When they ended you waited for them in the changing room. All the guys were first in, but Axl was slightly delayed, but soon he stepped over the dressing rooms threshold. "Guys, I have someone that I want you to meet." Axl said with a smile. It was quite unusual to see him this chirpy after a show, he would normally be ranting with the small nit-picky stuff of the not-so-good quality equipment. A stunning girl with long curly hair and the most beautiful blue eyes walked in behind him and then stood next to him. "This is Erin." He spoke. "My girlfriend". Those words hit you like a freight train, your ears started ringing. You felt so betrayed. You felt your heart break under the sheer amount of pain it just felt in that moment. You hated them. No not her. Him. Axl Rose. He played with your heart just like that. Did he think of you like you were some groupie? He couldn't have, your kiss and everything but lust behind it. You had to put. Brave face on to not like you wanted to kill yourself in that moment because, they rest of the band were introducing themselves and you were up next after Izzy. "This is our manager." Axl said as he motioned to you. "Ah! Oh my god you're so pretty! I've heard so much about you!" She said. 'Oh thank god she's a girls girl' You thought in relief.

You guys sat at the booth like normal, this time with Steven and Erin on your sides instead of Axl. Erin was absolutely lovely, you contemplated taking her for yourself and getting back at Axl. Or just taking her for yourself. You we're still heart sore and annoyed at Axl, with every word he spoke your malicious thoughts of getting back at him got worse and worse. Would he even care? He better. "If you weren't in the music business, what would you do?" Erin asked. You were about to speak but Axl spoke over you. "Some Rocket Science things. That's why we call her our Rocket Queen." He spoke. You coughed a little nearly choking as you remembered one of the stories behind the song Rocket Queen that they haven't even made yet. "That's so cool!" She responded. You smiled at her. "I can speak for myself Axl." You said with malice. "Geez, what's got you so riled up?" he asked as he laughed. You didn't know if he knew what he was doing was getting on your nerves, but he loved doing it. You rolled your eyes. "Stop listening in to our convos babe." She said as she playfully hit him. The pet name hurt you even more, but at least he was getting smacked. "Steven can you sit next to Axl so he can't eavesdrop?" You asked Steven, and he agreed and moved to the other side. You and Erin chatted more, as the guys were talking in their own world, it felt good to have another girl to talk to, you realised just how much more immature boys were. "So... Which one is your favourite?" She asked as she nudged you. "Oh, no no I can't choose," You giggled "Steven definitely. Oh, and maybe Duff as second" You whispered to her. "And the others?" She giggled "Izzy hates me for I don't know what reason. Slash doesn't warn anyone when he's bringing someone over, so I always get to hear the noises he makes." You giggled as you rolled your eyes. "And Axl just getting on my nerves sometimes." You added. "I don't know, I think Izzy has thing for you." She spoke. You stared at her with wide eyes and a 'what the fuck' expression on your face. You nearly burst out laughing. "Seriously! Look, every time he takes a sip of his drink, he looks at you." She whispered. You scoffed lightly at her in disbelief. "Look!" She whisper shouted. Both of you looked at Izzy who sat at the other side of the table. He took his glass, lifted it to his mouth and took a sip, his eyes then glanced to your end of the table. He saw the two of you looking back at him, and he quickly glanced back at the other guys while coughing slightly as he nearly choked on his drink. Your mouth was slightly a gape as you looked back at Erin, and she had the most shit eating grin ever and was about to giggle her ass off just like you were. She snorted then you did, it didn't take long till the two of you were laughing uncontrollably, not being able to breathe soon after. Izzy quickly made his way out of the booth seeing this scene unravel and he went to the bathroom. The rest of the band were looking at you two going mental.

You soon calmed down, but you didn't explain to the rest what happened. Axl looked a little irritated, but you didn't notice as you were having too much fun with Erin. Izzy soon came back also looking irritated but much more than Axl. You two didn't giggle more at him just encase he might go off on you. "But who do you like?" She asked. "Didn't you already ask me this?" You raised an eyebrow. "I mean like. Like, like you know?" She explained. Shit. You couldn't say it. "I can't date any of them. I'm their manager." You told her. "Yeah, but you can still like one of them. It's not illegal." She responded. "Nah, I couldn't." you said. 'Wise words, should have listened to them sooner.' You thought. "Come on! What about the tall one? He's been taking peeks at you too." She said. You blushed a bit, you had an initial crush on him, but you still couldn't pursue it. You looked at Duff who was talking amongst the group, then glanced at Axl who sat next to him. If Axl didn't care about you, then he wouldn't mind you getting closer with Duff. Right?

You all drank some more and talked some more. Izzy starred daggers at you the whole time. You didn't realise as you were talking to Erin and Duff over the table. It was soon time to leave, and you were innocently flirting with Duff as you were walking to the exit. Axl noticed and his intoxicated rage filled eyes glared at the sight of you two, and his anger burned brighter as Duff laid his hand on your shoulder as he sweet talked you and you giggled in response. Erin left to her own apartment as you were halfway home, Axl didn't even seem to acknowledge that. Or even get the slightest bit of excitement when offered going to her place to do some unspeakable business. He just grunted a 'bye' and continued to hang his head with distain as he continued walking. He gets like this when he's off his head drunk, but not when naked women are involved. You got home and everyone went to their respective rooms. You took Duffs hand and leaded him to your shared room, you were drunk and wanted to have fun, and especially get on Axl's nerves. Duff was more than happy to endorse what you were about to do. "Wait. I need to talk to you." Axl said. You rolled your eyes and sighed. You nudged your head at Duff to go to the room. You rested your back on the nearest wall and crossed your arms, as you gave a tired look at Axl. "Mhm?" You started. "What do you think you're getting at?" He accused. "I don't understand." You responded in a sarcastic annoyed tone back at him. "Why are you so angry? You have a girlfriend now. You should be ecstatic!" You waved your hand as you spoke. He huffed slightly, being at a loss for words. "Go on...?" You urged. Nothing. You got up off the wall about to walk to the room. "Just, don't hurt her." You said to him in a lighter serious tone. "Don't go kissing her and then leaving her for another girl the next week." You said as began walking. He did not like that. He started to speak up. "You ain't the fucking first. Just remember that." He shouted down at you. You knew you weren't, but you really wanted to be.

You did get back to the room, tired from the mental drainage that's been this night. Duff was half-way undressed but he was passed out hard on the bed. You sighed in relief as you put the covers over him and tucked yourself into bed next to his.

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gorbalsvampire · 4 months ago

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Gehenna War

It's pretty neat, yo.

Like Blood-Stained Love, it transforms the core "personal and political" horror of Vampire into another subgenre. Unlike Blood-Stained Love, it has a lot of concrete advice for Storytellers on structuring scenes, assembling pools, building characters to interact with, and making that subgenre work at the table.

An effort has been made, here. There's a little chart in the introduction claiming that Chapters 2 and 3, and the Appendices, will be of use to any action chronicle, be it more high concept or street level, and having read the durn things I think that claim's borne out. I'm gonna talk about those sections first, and later loop back around to the specifically Gehenna War stuff.

Chapter 2 has neat archetypes for characters in various armed conflict roles - generals, spies, intelligencers, recruits, veterans - with recommendations for priority stats rather than statblocks, so these can be flipped for player or Storyteller use. Suggestions for bonus XP amounts if you want more powerful starting characters, and focused specialisations that advise you to focus particular areas of your character sheet - almost like soft classes, or playbooks. A handful of new Merits and Flaws (one of which is getting slammed onto Penny), and a mixed bag of Discipline powers. Bloodform is back? Woo! There are "reroll Rouse checks for raising this one Attribute or using this one Discipline" openers for the Physical Disciplines? Swing and a miss, more filler. There's two incredible new high-end Blood Sorcery rituals (I shall be using both of them very soon), and some funky Thin-Blood Alchemy if you want your Duskborn to join a Methuselah cult.

Then: advice on running Basic Combat, and explicit guidance on the modularity of the Advanced Combat rules, and a few new ones. This is brilliant stuff for new Storytellers, reflective of the demand for the Combat Primer, and it's given me some ideas I didn't have before, and ALSO. VINDICATION. OBSERVE.

One of the things that waters down play over time is if the characters need to build the same dice pool every time for the same task. To avoid this, Storytellers should vary the traits involved according to the situation, to keep things interesting and to curb players trying to optimize their pools.

Leaving aside that awful syntax at the start - "Play becomes predictable if the characters need to build the same dice pool every time they attempt a task" - activate your voice, and dismiss "is" clauses, you cowards! - anyway, leaving that aside, this is how I've been doing things all along and I love that a book explicitly says "do it and don't get hung up on the exact RAW every time."

Car chase mechanics, cute new gear (I like the Scourge Blades, nasty-ass duelling swords that delay vampiric healing). Then it's on to story advice!

Chapter Three does something I wish Blood-Stained Love had done for romance: getting into the structure of action stories, how action interacts with other genre qualifiers (crime, horror, survival, thriller etc.), the escalating role of villains - like, actual formalist thinking about how stories work. We then get some mechanical advice on how to shift the mode of play, how to approach things like Hunger and Frenzy to make them more or less of a factor. It's short, but it's fuckin' GOOD.

Appendix I is all about dice. When you should and shouldn't roll, as opposed to taking half. Grouping those moments into broad types by what they do to the emergent story. How to add variation with tracker rolls or unusual dice pools. How to manage failures on tests and what to offer players to keep the story moving. And, most important of all, how to deal with the Beast, going through each Skill and showing how the Beast impacts a Messy Critical (still a success, remember!) or a Bestial Failure.

You need this Appendix. The corebook needed this appendix. Maybe it took six years of best practice and sharing ideas to get these ideas fully understood. Maybe if there'd been one dev team since the start we might have had this sooner. At least we have it now.

I'll talk about the Gehenna War itself in a follow-up post. That's Chapters One, Four, Five and Six, and Appendix II.

#vtm #vampire the masquerade #v5 #gehenna war #sourcebook #review #st advice #gm advice

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sserajeans · 1 year ago

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you are in love | 47. coffee at midnight (written)

unfortunately for both y/n and hanni, the coffee machine and the soft serve machine were right beside each other.

talk about a coincidence, huh?

hanni slowly took her steps hoping y/n would think she was someone else, after all there were maybe 3 other people browsing in the store. faces of a few neighbors they were familiar with.

but timing was always on their side, it seems.

hanni was a couple steps away when y/n turned around, her desired cup of decaf in hand.

panic visibly ran through the two's faces as their eyes met, almost like they both knew they were the last person the other needed to see that night.

but they don't know what the other knows, so the childhood best friends began putting up horrible acts of "everything's fine."

hanni gave y/n a tight lipped smile as a greeting, y/n returning with a nod before stepping aside to let her friend use the machine. hanni forgot about the soft serve she initially wanted.

as y/n stepped aside, her eyes wandered, finally landing on the jellies across the coffee machine, and suddenly the bags of swedish fish were the most interesting things in the world. they reminded her of leehan.

she could've just easily walked away, leave the store, and avoid hanni pham for another day. but something inside her told her to stay. whether it was the heavy clouds (even at night) that made it look like it was going to rain, or if it was the underlying need to see her again (something she'd never admit to, not right now at least), she stayed.

"so... what're you doing here? at 12?" what would've been the most comforting and relieving voice to hear on a normal day, became the reason why y/n slightly flinched as she was browsing through the different haribo gummies both she and hanni knew she didn't like.

"ah... just needed a coffee." y/n sighed, taking another sip before thinking about leaving the haribo gummies alone. "you?"

"was just hoping to get some fresh air and passed by here for a drink." hanni's eyes traveled around every corner of the room, anywhere to avoid y/n's. "i've just been... thinking about things, you know me."

"yeah." y/n didn't buy the half-lie.

the two stood there, eyes still fixed on the haribo gummies and swedish fish. the employee of the store was probably concerned by now.

"listen... can we talk?"

y/n's eyes widened hearing hanni's words, but she was quick to retain her previous expression.

she nodded and motioned her head towards the door of the convenience store, and the two walked outside. they sat beside each other, albeit awkwardly, on a park bench with an unusual amount of space between them.

"so... what's been on your mind?"

hanni looked up at y/n, eyes shifting from her coffee cup, startled from the sudden question breaking the silent air.

"i.. uh..."

should she say it? is she sure?

"do you like danielle now?"

she wasn’t.

y/n scoffed. a sudden warmth built itself inside her, but it wasn't from the comfort she was used to feeling around hanni pham. she was pissed. finally thinking her best friend could give her some kind of answer, she didn't.

"is that what you wanted to ask?"

but it was different for hanni. it wasn't like she wanted to reel y/n back in and prevent her from moving on. or well, maybe it was, but it definitely wasn’t that entirely. but just how and why would she finally open up about everything to y/n if it didn't matter anymore?

"yeah." hanni admitted, well it wasn't the whole truth, as a matter of fact it was just the tip of the iceberg. on why her mind was awake this late, why she called minji at night to talk, why she needed air to clear her thoughts.

there was a shift in the mood. a clear discomfort ran over y/n's face, and she moved to sit up straight.

"i don't know, pham. but i like that she's clear with her intentions for me. she doesn't just say things are complicated." her tone laced with something hanni couldn't identify. she's never talked like this to her before.

"y/n... it's a lot harder than that." hanni wasn't going to cry tonight, but after minji's talk, her voice was tired, and it was clear she was worn down.

"is it? i also like that she doesn't give me mixed signs. she doesn't tell me she doesn't like me that way but acts like she does and makes everyone think that way because of it. i think you'd know."

hanni felt something damp hit her hands, a drop. a water drop. but y/n's voice was solid, it wasn't cracking or shaking like it usually did when she cried. hanni knew that for sure. and she wasn’t crying either.

ah. it was going to rain.

"y/n, you know i never said i didn't lik-" hanni tried to reason out, but y/n was only proving why avoiding her for a while was the right decision.

"but you never said you did either. and what was i supposed to do then?"

"y/n."

"this is so unfair for me, hanni."

"i know, and i'm sorry. just pleas-"

"were my feelings then so easily… disposable for you? because it really seemed like they were. 'oh it's complicated y/n' and then we went back to how things were. and you know what? i was actually fine with it. but when i start moving on with a girl who’d actually care for me, suddenly you get to act like it's not okay."

hanni closed her eyes, sighing. the more y/n spoke, somehow the harder the rain fell.

"so what is it, pham?"

for the first time that night, y/n's eyes were fixed on hanni's. hanni hesitantly opened hers and for a while they sat there, silently staring while the rain poured and mercilessly drenched both of them.

"just give me time please y/n... i'm almost there."

"you had 5 years."

"i know. and i'm sorry for just shrugging it off, those 5 years, okay? i wish the answer would come to me sooner too."

"really, pham." y/n's voice was cold, and it stung. there was no other word to describe it. lack of warmth, emotion, everything it'd usually have when she was with hanni. her eyes shifted back to the ground.

"it's not easy for me either, y/n."

silence. no sound. nothing other than the rainfall that was finally beginning to slow down.

"i admit i didn't think about how you would've felt when i chose to do the things i did, but you don't know what it's like in my shoes either.”

y/n heard hanni stand up from the bench, but it tired her too much, emotionally and physically, to look up. her eyes remained glued to the floor, and based off the position of hanni’s feet, the shorter was definitely facing her slouched figure.

“and don’t you dare act like i’ve never cared for you, lee y/n. you hate it when i do and call me out if i don’t. which is it, really?”

and the two left it at that. awkwardly walking back home in the same direction. though y/n insisted on walking a couple meters behind to keep her distance, anyone who knew the pair would know it was some sort of protective habit she had.

then came the main intersection that separated the roads each of them lived in, and for a while hanni didn't move, standing on the sidewalk of her street. the rain had gone away by now.

she turned back, slowly, waiting to make sure y/n was at the right road. it was the least she could do to make sure she went home safe.

after a few minutes walking on the damp sidewalk, y/n squeezed out excess water, whether it was from her hair or her clothes, then rang the doorbell of her front door.

it took a while, maybe 2 minutes, for hyein to remember her sister wasn't home to get the door, but y/n didn't mind. she knew her sister well enough.

"unnie?..." hyein was shocked but slowly guided the drenched y/n inside the house, making sure to leave her shoes outside. y/n told her she was heading out, but that was over an hour ago, and she was hoping her sister would’ve at least brought a jacket.

hyein took after y/n in the way she ran up and down the stairs with towels and dry clothes. she then prepared tea while her sister was in the bathroom.

"so... is it something you wanna talk about?" hyein finally asked as y/n left the toilet. she took the mug of tea and sat down on the couch. it wasn’t an everyday norm for lee y/n to walk out at midnight and come back drenched in rain water. it wasn’t an everyday norm for anyone.

the older thought about it, then deciding to shake her head in response as a 'no' before drinking. hanni was hyein's favorite. no one really says it out loud, but there was a reason 7-year old hyein wanted the two to be, in her words, her secondary parents.

so y/n chose not to speak of the argument she had. what happened was between her and hanni, and no one else.

after making sure her sister wasn't going to catch a cold (giving her a silent hug while she was at it), hyein went upstairs to go back to bed, leaving y/n in the living room as per her request.

by the time y/n had finished her cup of tea, her mind was occupied with only two thoughts.

'i have to text minji right now.'

and

‘did hanni have someone to take care of her when she got home?’

masterlist. next.

taglist: @yyeonmis @lostamoeba @jisooftme @yoontoonwhs @awkwardtoafault @lcv3lies @limbforalimb @kaypanaq @manooffline @kimsgayness @justme-idle @mightymyo @sewiouslyz @txtbrainrot @li0ilthecxnt @captivq @paranoxic @sofakingwoso @pandafuriosa60 @haerinkisser @lesleepyyy @haechansbbg @rosiehrs @jiwoneiric @blue4hour @bzeus28

#newjeans x reader #newjeans imagines #newjeans smau #newjeans fanfic #hanni x reader #hanni pham x reader #hanni imagines #hanni smau #kim minji #danielle marsh #mo jihye #kang haerin #lee hyein

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itsgrimeytime · 1 year ago

Text

Magnolia in May (Part Eighteen) || Rick Grimes (TWD) x Greene!f!reader Regency AU

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17...

Taglist: @loliakeoghan23 @belaballs @curlycarley @queenie32 @mgparker

rick grimes taglist: @golden-hoax

AVAILABLE ON AO3

Inspiration (in honor of Speak Now Taylor's Version): Enchanted by Taylor Swift.

Summary: Your town was small, not the smallest you knew, but anyone of high fortune was the gossip of the week. Predictably, Richard Grimes was a thing of whispers -rumors of a search for marriage among the grassy hills. You weren't one to buy into town gossip, but something about him... just seemed a little too intriguing.

TWS: duelling mention, gun mention.

[[A/N: Thanks for reading!!! ]]

There was another knock on the door -a lingering sort of knock as knuckles dragged along the wood. Not a knock you knew.

You knew your family's knock, except the Headmistress who often just barged in, and you were gathering to understand Mr. Dixon and Mr. Grimes' knocks just by their visit amount. But it was an unusual sort of thing, not proper, and not quick.

Something in you wished to return to your room, you did not listen.

You swung the door open a peek, foot propped against the door to keep it from moving. You readied your best scream and glanced out the sliver.

A tall man, not as tall as Mr. Grimes but certainly close, black curly hair and warm brown eyes -his hair, atop his head was indented. As if he'd been bandaged-

You knew this man, didn't you? He just felt so...

And then he looked at you, the creep of a smile on his lips and a toothy sort of grin. You knew that grin, you knew that-

You swung the door shut.

"Mr. Walsh," you spoke through the door, "-I'm going to request you leave the premises. Perhaps head back to the clinic? To be treated?"

There was silence on the other end for a moment, and you were half worried he'd collapsed on your doorstep until he spoke up.

"I just wish to talk to Rick's lady," he spoke -rather loopy, big airy breaths and you had the unusual feeling that he was perhaps drugged (not fully maybe the after-effects of some medicine), "-I hear she lives here."

"I'm afraid you're incorrect, Mr. Walsh," you answered -strictly.

"It's you," he remarked, intelligently, "-ain't it? You know my name, why would you know my name if you weren't the famous Ms. Greene."

You remained silent, unsure of what to say. You were in a situation beyond understanding, and were afraid -you didn't know his capabilities.

"I just..." he echoed, rather vulnerably, "-I want'cha to know it wasn't just because she was Rick's wife. That wasn't-"

"Mr. Walsh," you urged him to quieten, "-my father is bound to attend to such matters soon, I don't believe you should be here when he does."

"I love Lori," he echoed, lost and far away, "-I love Lori and when she left I didn't know what to do. And then I find out she's with Rick, and then I just- I couldn't think-"

"Mr. Walsh-"

"I was afraid and angry and I pressed 'im, 'til he said yes. And then the man wouldn't even use the gun-"

"Mr. Walsh, please!" you escalated, before settling back down, softer and quieter, "-I don't believe you should confess to illegal things so loud."

"Smart," he let out a gruff chuckle, before sinking to the ground -the scrape of the wood as he leaned upon it scaring you slightly, "-now I know why Rick chose ya."

On instinct, your mouth flew open, "He didn't choose me. We weren't just objects to pick, you know."

"Fair 'nough," he remarked, much lower now and you could hear the scrape of his shoes on the gravel as he fell silent.

The ominous sort of silence that made you wish to say something small just to clear the air. But you weren't sure what you should've said, or what you could've rather-

"Did ya see 'er?"

You didn't have to ask who, the whisper -vulnerable and open- was quite enough, "Yes, I've met her upon Mr. Grimes's estate."

"No, not-" he echoed, "-not Lori."

Judith, you realized quietly. You hadn't thought about the other half, the man who lost his only child because of stature, of societal standards. You had no children but to imagine such pain... You truly couldn't.

"She's who I met first," you responded, slow and quiet, "-wanted a berry at the shops."

"She must be so grown now," he echoed -lost and far away again.

"Mr. Walsh," you responded, a whisper really -saying everything and nothing at all, "-she's very happy where she is."

"I don't deserve such a family," he answered both your implication and your statement, "-it's only proof I dueled the man that is housing her out of only gratitude."

You thought for a moment, just a spare moment.

"Would you like me to describe her?"

"Yes," he answered, more humane -more vulnerable, "-I very much would."

"Well..."

You talked for a few minutes, slow and careful and laughing when it felt necessary -describing her ask for your berry rather directly. Headstrong, you had decided. You spoke until you heard him rise to his feet -the smallest whisper of a thank you drifting into your ear.

And it wasn't until a moment after that a frantic knock came, rushed and urgent as if begging for you to open. Worry.

You merely reacted as you did, a sort of heaviness weighing onto your shoulders -something you hadn't imagined upon first meeting Mr. Walsh. And still, you know he betrayed Mr. Grimes's trust, yet he was still a human, he had nuance. Once again you found yourself assuming when you shouldn't have, and it framed you differently now.

You opened the door.

"Oh, thank goodness," erupted your father standing there with a creased forehead and rushing forward -hands brushing over your arms and enveloping you into a hug, "-you're alright."

"I'm fine, Father, truly," you laughed.

Mr. Grimes followed him in, he looked rather charming today but perhaps that was the concern for you shining bright in his eyes that made you biased. His suit was a deep sort of blue now, wonderous, and fit him perfectly -you wished you'd seen him in better circumstances.

"Did he come?" He asked, eyes dragging along your frame like he could find any evidence of him there if he had hurt you.

"Yes, he did but-" you started, "-he stayed on the outside of the door. We merely spoke."

"You would tell me if otherwise, yes?" your Father spoke, pulling back from the hug with a raised brow.

"Of course," you exclaimed, such as such a thought was obvious, "-I was getting ready for an outing with Mr. Grimes, you think I'd let such a man cloud my judgment?"

Mr. Grimes laughed, and you merely gleamed brighter from such a noise.

"Well, don't let me keep you," Father hummed, letting you go -hesitantly, "-Mr. Grimes?"

"I will be by her side every moment, sir," he responded, humming, "-if not me, my courier."

"Good," your Father seemed to relax slightly, "-now off you go, enjoy the sun while it's still high. And don't forget the milk, darlin'."

"Yes, I know, Father," you responded, digging into your purse for a piece of paper quickly written at the moment, "-I've written a list."

And then you were off, initially towards the direction of the shops, but suddenly, he pulled you to the side. Mr. Grimes gently guided you to a carriage, embellished the same as the one he sent, but a touch different -his personal carriage.

"Drive us around the block, will you?" he spoke, casually, before extending a hand to help you into the carriage -gentlemanly.

Your face bloomed a crimson as he joined you in the area -the space was much closer than you'd ever quite imagined with him. It was usually ballrooms and offices, this was rather private.

"I hope you don't mind my detour," Mr. Grimes spoke, low, "-I must speak to you about Mr. Walsh's visit."

"You wish to know what happened?" you responded in kind, matching his eyes -something in there was off, "-You must know I would never do anything against you."

"I do," he turned fully toward you, and you could feel his breaths on your face. You turned further crimson, "-but I want to be sure what he's spoken of is not deceitful."

"I don't believe it was," you spoke, turning your head because it was rather close, "-it was rather vulnerable, I don't believe men usually lie when they're vulnerable."

Mr. Grimes tilted his head slightly, "Was he in despair?"

"A bit," you responded, unsure, "-I believe medicine may have weakened his sense. He was improper but honest, I do believe. And he spoke only of Lori and Judith."

"I believe such a conversation was disheartening?"

"It was," you answered, rather dramatically, "-I find I never thought of his perspective."

"A fate I'd never wish on anyone," he remarked, quietly.

Something in him was sad, you could see it in his slouched shoulders, the pout of his lip, and the dimness of his eyes. You merely moved your hand to hold his for a moment, interlocking fingers between the space on the seat.

"It's for the best," you spoke, a bit distantly but all for him to hear, "-you are doing what is right."

"I know," he echoed, tightening the grip and bringing the united hands to his lips -kissing the back of yours (lips brushing along your skin), "-I know."

#rick grimes #its griming time #stuff n' thangs #rick grimes x reader #rick grimes x y/n #rick grimes x you #rick grimes x y/n fanfiction #twd #twd rick #rick grimes fanfiction #rick grimes oneshot #magnolia in may

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lukecvntstellan · 8 months ago

Note

do you reckon u could do a leo x reader fluff plsss 🙏

a/n: this is the first time i've written anything ____ x reader in a LOOONNNGGGGG time... forgive me if i'm rusty. don't be tooo mean i'll probably sob idk

improper grammar probably (not proofread) and written in all lowercase because i dont feel like capitalizing

---

hurt/comfort with leo valdez x reader i guesssss

---

leo had been down on himself recently. him and his significant other had been together almost a year now. as of late he had been locking himself in bunker nine, away from his friends and s/o.

leo had been drowning himself in work, alone in bunker 9, as an excuse for his loneliness. over his music he hears the door swing open, he looks up expecting to see his s/o, but is instead greeted by one of his best friends, piper mclean.

"hey, leo. we noticed you've been spending a lot of time in here... is everything okay?"

the question he knew was coming, but had been dreading.

leo unplugged his radio before saying, "yeah, piper, i've been great. just working on a big project!" trying to feign excitement over his project, which in reality was a pile of scrap metal on his desk that he wasn't quite sure what to do with.

"i'm sorry, but you're the most social out of our friend group? locking yourself in here for days is unusual. y/n has been worried about you. you haven't even spoken to them?"

"okay piper. i'm sorry. okay? i just don't know what to say. you're the only person i've opened up to before. i'm scared y/n would leave me if they knew what was happening. i can't tell them. being with me is already hard enough, i don't need to add on additional burden with the nightmares i've been having..."

despite being "closer" with jason, leo had only ever talked about his feelings with piper before. jason already had enough of his own problems, and never really noticed when leo was going through something.

ever since leo was claimed by his father he had been told by multiple people that he was fated to always be the outsider, never have a place, always the seventh wheel. those words echo through his mind constantly, never ending. because of this, having an s/o was hard. thoughts of "do i deserve this?" "are they going to leave me?" and "am i good enough for them?" were always cycling through his mind.

piper's voice cut through leo's thoughts, "i'm not the one you should be apologizing to. i think you need to talk to them. they're worried about you. do you want to tell me what's been happening first though?"

"do you remember a few months ago i told you about the dreams i had, with hera in them?"

"oh gods.. they're back?"

"yeah... i haven't been sleeping to avoid them. but now i'm so tired and i want to sleep. but i'm scared."

piper moved to give leo a quick hug. "i'm sorry that the dreams are back. i'm gonna get y/n to come talk to you. okay?"

"thanks beauty queen." (**LEOS NORMAL NICKNAME FOR HER IN THE BOOKS**)

as piper was leaving leo walked over to the bed he had made for his late nights in bunker nine, preparing for a conversation he did not want to have.

emotions weren't leo's strong suit. he always tried to be funny and cool to distract from any emotional issues that were happening. no amount of jokes could hide the dark circles under his eyes and his unbrushed hair. he looked rough.

the door opened, and y/n walked in and sat down next to leo. running their hand through his unkempt curls they asked, "are you okay, what's going on? i'm worried about you."

leo laid down, his head in y/n's lap, and their hands gently playing with his hair.

"my dreams have been really bad recently. i haven't been sleeping to avoid them. i'm so tired. i haven't been able to finish any project i've started. i can't do anything right-" leo pointed to the haphazard pile of junk on his desk.

tears started to form, leo tried to blink them away, to no success.

"i guess i've always been insecure? i've been told by hera and nemesis that i'm meant to be this outsider with no role and will always be alone and now i just feel like i don't deserve you. and all my dreams lately have just been those same words on repeat. hera standing there telling me that i'm always going to be the seventh wheel. i'm never going to find my place. i can't take it anymore."

y/n pressed a light kiss to his forehead while contemplating their words.

"leo. you realize that isn't true, right? you DO deserve me. you're not an outsider either, you have a place in our friend group. everyone there loves you. and I love you-"

"love me? you haven't said that before"

"i've been thinking it for a while"

leo couldn't hide the smile that was taking over his face. "really? i love you too, actually, i love you more." he sat up and tackled y/n down on the bed in a hug. "you can't ever leave me now, you're trapped here!" leo said through a laugh.

"you know, i wouldn't dream of it."

"i mean, you probably will. the demigod dreams go kinda crazy."

"you know what i meant, stupid."

"WHAT! you think i'm stupid?" leo protested.

"no. i didn't mean it like that and you know it."

leo shut up after that. being in the arms of his partner after not sleeping for days was making the sleepiness overwhelming. y/n noticed leo drifting off, running their hands through his hair and whispering soft "i love you's" and other sweet nothings.

this was the first night of no nightmares in a week for him :)

---

this is ASSS bc i wrote it at mostly 4am and i dont proofread. the concept is there, the execution isn't.

i love leo i think he deserves some comfort in his life PLEASE

#percy jackson #heroes of olympus #leo valdez #riordanverse #hoo #leo pjo #percy jackon and the olympians #leo hoo

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punsmaster69 · 11 months ago

Text

14/JAN/20XX

"MK, dude. You're gonna kill him."

frisk picked up their kickball that's narrowly missed me enough times to make me reconsider my seating.

"Sorry, Sans."

"Should we move this somewhere else?"

"Your back yard has more space, right?"

"Yeah. Race you there!"

"On the count of three."

"You can count!"

frisk inhaled...

"Okaythreetwoonego-"

darting instantly around the back of the house.

"Wai- Frisk, that's not fair!!"

clearly caught of guard, monster kid gave chase.

"......."

"You're just gonna watch them leave?"

"i'll get up in a sec."

"Gee, some kind of babysitter you are."

"like i said, i'll get up in a sec."

"besides, this isn't technically babysitting."

"How is it not?"

"not my job."

"Didn't Toriel put you up to this or something?"

"nope."

"Why are you even here?!"

"bored."

"Don't you have anyone else to bug?"

"nope."

"Papyrus?"

"working with asgore. doin' ambassador stuff."

"Alphys?"

"on a date with undyne."

"Grillby?"

"bothered him enough yesterday."

"You could go work for once. Pay him back."

an unusual amount of exhaustion slows my every movement today. not the lazy slow i've typically got; slow like sludge.

i blame it on the dog that wouldn't stop rifling through everything in my room. normally i'd kick it out, but then it'd go bug papyrus. knowing ahead of time he'd be busy today, i'd let it annoy me for the night.

"i'm bored, but i'm not 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 bored."

"Lazy ass."

"the rest of me's lazy too, y'know."

grabbed his pot and carried it with me to the back porch with me. i was met with a frankly surprising lack of complaints, his scowl being the extent of it.

he ignored my reply.

"Fine. Not Grillby, not Papyrus, not Alphys..."

"Don't you hang out with Napstablook sometimes?"

"yeah."

"Why not them?"

"they're with mtt. calling mew, i think."

"...How's she doing?"

"𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 wondering how someone's doing?"

"feelin' alright, bud?"

"Shut up. I'm only asking because she's tolerable compared to a lot of you."

"I relate to her constant rage, on some level."

"last i heard, the idol stuff was going well."

"Getting paid to do nothing but look good..."

"I'd say it sounds like easy cash, but I know 𝘆𝗼𝘂 couldn't do it."

"i do plenty of nothing."

"The looking good part."

"you'd be surprised at how low standards are these days."

"Yours specifically?"

"That's no shock. Your jacket's got a stain on it RIGHT there."

"eh."

"When's the last time you washed that thing?"

"at least sometime last month."

"Eugh!"

"I'm surprised you don't smell like anything worse than ketchup."

"my lack of body with which to produce odor contributes to that."

"......."

"you totally stink though."

"I don't have a body either, idiot!"

"got the odor though."

"I don't sm- HEY!!!"

the kickball slammed against the railing flowey was on, giving him a good shake.

"WATCH IT!"

"Frisk, dude. You're gonna kill him."

mocking tonality, soon broken with giggling.

frisk punched them in the shoulder before running back in the yard to receive the kick from monster kid.

"Both of them need to get better."

"at playing?"

"Whatever game that is."

"why don't you go play with 'em?"

the incredulous look he gave me was expected.

"Because I don't have limbs??"

"so you'd play if you could."

"No! It looks boring."

"yet you watch them play."

"Watching is different!"

"watching is looks."

"and you said it looks boring."

"Shut it, herd."

"nope."

knowing full well that i was letting myself be lulled by the sun and gentle breeze into a nap, right there in tori's porch chair.

#undertale #journal #sans #frisk #monster kid #flowey

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lucapizzelles · 8 months ago

Text

Hello I've decided I want to make a longform post about sea monster gills okay 321 go

Under the cut because there's a near embarrassing amount of yapping

To begin, I promise these next two paragraphs are relevant:

Amphibians are known for having both lungs and gills (with a small caveat). However, most (not all! will come back to this in a second) amphibians actually lose their gills in their transition to adulthood (there’s the caveat). Many amphibians instead ‘breathe’ through their skin, cutaneous respiration, by diffusing oxygen in the water into their blood cells. Sick af. Unfortunately, this does not (usually) mean they can live all of their life underwater. A main issue faced by many amphibians is that the water is not saturated with nearly enough oxygen, meaning they need to surface sometimes to take air (far more oxygen dense) in through their lungs. Though they can’t stay there forever, this does mean that they can stay underwater for prolonged periods of time, both by having an insane ability to hold their breath and by using their skin to 'breathe.'

So, the thing with most amphibians lose their gills: Axolotls, for example, are actually what's known as a paedomorphic animal (humans are somewhat paedomorphic as well, fun fact), meaning that their features (or some of them) don't change during their transition from adolescence to adulthood. This is unusual, because most amphibians undergo a metamorphosis in which they lose their gills when they move on from the larval stage. Axolotls, though, do not have a larval stage AND keep their gills.

So, in the movie, Luca has never been to the surface, he hasn’t even been above the surface level of the water (more on this in a second). Amphibians that undergo a metamorphosis and lose their gills almost always come up for air at some point, as, like mentioned before, the "breathing through their skin" method is just not sustainable. So, if not all sea monsters, Luca, at least, must have gills. You can argue that Luca has not yet undergone a metamorphosis, thus meaning his parents might not have gills while he does, but that’s implying he is in the larval stage right now. Due to how similar he looks to his parents and other adults (and, though I’m hesitant to use concept art, how similar he looked as an even younger child), I’m going to say that sea monsters are very much so paedomorphic and don't have any larval stage.

(Evidence 0, technically: I also will argue that, given how much Daniela is against even going towards the surface, if she (and other adults) had to breach the water level to breathe in air, then this concept wouldn't be so taboo to Luca. Daniela likely would've told him that he will eventually develop lungs and he will need to breathe air, especially as he's, like, 12, and, assuming that sea monster puberty is around the same time as human, he is soon going to undergo that metamorphosis. OR, Luca would've at least seen his parents, his grandma, any other villager, going towards the surface to breathe. Regardless, I'm not subscribing to the theory that they lose their gills, anyway.)

Side note: this also leans them, taxonomically, towards being amphibians and not reptiles

(side note about the side note: this also unfortunately means they probably don’t have claws. I do my best to bend the rules of nature accordingly to fit what their actual anatomy in the film is instead of saying “they don’t have x thing” that they clearly DO have, but, in the film they don’t actually have visible claws (their sea monster fingers are pointy at the ends, but I think that's just how they grow, look at salamander paws). This is incredibly unfortunate, because I really like the idea of them having claws. What is incredibly not unfortunate is that the world is made of pudding and if I want them to have claws then they can and I will reshape taxonomy as we know it to make that happen. And you can too! (Also I’m giggling. Even in the most stereotypically threatening scenario that we see sea monsters, when Alberto reveals himself, the fingertips are still distinctly round. Human nails can do more damage. Lmfao. Little baby.))

This next section is a lot of silly analysis simply for fun because I was on the debate team and everything needs evidence:

Evidence 1 timestamp 5:55- 6:20

The scene where Luca sees a boat and then imagines himself floating up to the surface of the water, where he's about to breach it and see the human- but his own imagination stops him. The water forms an impenetrable barrier around him and he can’t push his way out of it. This is both for the audience to see how Luca feels trapped under the water and also demonstrate that he’s very interested in the surface, despite his “good-kid” nature. Ignoring the character development, I’m going to use this scene to say that he absolutely has gills. If he had no gills, then going above water level wouldn’t be so forbidden. Of course, like whales, dolphins, and other marine mammals, you can absolutely have animals that live entirely underwater and simply hold their breath for a really, really long time before breaching for air, but this isn’t the case. To breathe in the air, he’d need to breach the surface of the water, and if this was a consistent thing in his life so as to, say, not die, then it wouldn’t be an issue for him to imagine it. Thus, he was likely born underwater and also born with gills.

Evidence 2 timestamp 0:00-0:15

Pretty much exactly what I said before but no longer daydreaming and it just further enforces what I said. If he had simply breached the surface of the water at some point in the past, let alone go onto the surface itself, then he wouldn’t struggle so much. One could argue he’s nervous to go above the water level because he knows the next step is to go onto the surface, and to that I say: yeah you’re probably right. Consider though: the daydream sequence. Also I would throw the slippery slope logical fallacy at your face, but Luca himself was probably slippery slope-ing in that argument, so I am keeping my mouth shut.

Evidence 3 timestamp 4:00

This is actually a bit niche (and a stretch, but everything in this post is a stretch), but if you watch the “Deleted Scenes” Bonus Feature for Luca (2021), specifically “Starfish Hunting (timestamp 1:25),” you get more insight as to why this scene is important. Just to overview it: Enrico Casarosa clarifies that this alternative introduction scene to the film specifically highlights the quiet moments during Luca (2021): “[...] There was a tone in [this scene] that was important to the movie, and it really inspired many other moments. I find it’s one of those sequences that we always kept talking about that we gotta make sure we carve time for the slower, quiet, little reveries to nature” (Casarosa). The scene that played in the background as he said that quote was the scene I just linked you too for the third evidence. I bring up this whole other thing to prove that every little thing in this scene was thought about, especially (drumroll) the feeling of the air on Luca. In this scene, you soooo clearly see how Luca’s hair shifts as the wind sweeps through it, which they wouldn’t add in that animation detail* and make it so front and center of the scene if it wasn’t important. As it is for the audience, it’s also Luca’s first time feeling the sensation of air like that on his skin.

*huge note: you can clearly see the wind brushing through Luca’s (and others’) hair a lot throughout the film, an example off the top of my head is the nighttime scene on the lighthouse when Luca asked what the stars were. Worth mentioning. Do with that what you will.

So, they likely have gills. Now what? Well, originally I thought that there’s really only one place for their gills to be: within their pharynx. Like fish, the sea monster would breathe in through their mouth (or nostrils and they make use of a secondary palette), and the water passes over their gills in the pharynx and out through the sides of their necks, covered by an operculum. This felt shaky, honestly, as the main issue is the operculum not being present in their models for the movie. However, pharynx-located gills was all that I knew of internal gills to be, until:

Signal2Noise’s sick ass bichambered lung theory (idek how they thought of this but it’s actually so awesome and is my personal hc now and I want to share it)

So, to finish off, I wanna talk about this fic briefly. (Observations of the Sea Monster, by Signal2Noise on ao3) (if the link doesn’t work)

It’s not really a fic, it's (in their own words) a “mock-scientific paper written in 1999.”I just wanna talk about their respiration section (and I'm going to try and translate much of it into more layman’s terms), but I highly encourage you to read the full thing, especially if you’re interested in their biology and such, because it’s INCREDIBLY interesting. The amount of work clearly put into it is amazing. I’ve already gassed it up on this site before.

I don’t want to repost any of their work here, so (and I believe it’s no longer marked as only members can view it) go to chapter 7 to specifically see their bichambered lung theory. It does have a lot of science-y jargon, but it’s very much worth it.

Essentially, two lung chambers (one major, one minor). Sea monster breathes in water, oxygenated water goes into the major chamber, over/through the gills, and the now deoxygenated water drains into the minor chamber. The minor chamber opens up into the trachea through a dorsal facing bronchiole to allow the water to be exhaled out. In the same way that the epiglottis prevents food from going in our windpipe when swallowing, a similar structure prevents the water from flowing back into the major chamber during exhalation.

Very cool!

I don’t have much else to say. I just wanted to ramble about this and actually I had most of this sitting in a google document for a long time. I figured that I really enjoy when people ramble about Luca regardless of what it’s about so maybe someone else shares a similar mindset. Also, I don’t see people talking about their biology in this way very often. I also don’t think the gills thing was heavily disputed in the fandom? Like, I think most of us agree that they breathe underwater somehow, but this was still fun to put together. Also, just to add on to why cutaneous respiration isn't likely for them (not that they can’t do it at all but): too much of their body is covered in scales for it to be efficient in any way. Only being able to breathe using the skin on your chest, belly, and face would kill you, probably.

Hope you enjoyed the random analysis and all-over-the-place rambles and the mini zoology lesson :]

#luca 2021 #pixar luca #luca pixar #sea monster biology #this was very fun to write and i had most of it just sitting around for a while

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