#i don't say “sorry” about my interests lightly! i draw parasitic alien snail things and i happily force my classmates to critique them!

[bobcat-pie]

OK so I was reading up on cloning in Star Wars and found out that:

the idea of "Palpatine's clone-based gambit for immortality" has been around LOOONG before the shit writing of the new trilogy, it's just that it was in the noncanon Legends continuity.

his clone vessels suck shit and age super fast and he can't make them stop aging super fast. This is because cloning "breaks the natural chain of life" or some shit, so his vessels have zero defense against the ravages of the dark side.

But like, what is the functional difference between birth from an artificial womb and birth from an organic one?

Well. The microbiome doesn't get established quick enough.

It's possible that the millions of living microscopic organs in everyone's bodies may play some part in shielding the body from the adverse health effects of the dark side. This is a shield that newborn clones would lack, since they couldn't inherit the microbiome their parent passed down to them.

But noooo, ol' Palpatine just HAS to throw force lightning around or psychically manipulate his underlings or something 0.1 seconds after he's decanted, thereby busting his telomeres clean off his chromosomes! Noooo, he CAN'T cannonball into a vat of probiotic yogurt first!