#i don't really have many pals who are into the series atm so i'm just yodeling into a void by myself tbh
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empoleon · 2 years ago
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stranger things have happened
• rated m, one shot, 3088 words
• also available to read here
Wolfwood is humming something against the fabric of Vash’s shirt—his shirt, because Vash has taken to wearing his articles of clothing as of late—when Vash speaks up.
“They like that,” he says softly, tilting his head back with a smile.
Wolfwood pauses, lips ghosting a kiss near the spot where he was singing. “’S just something I heard a long time ago.”
From the orphanage, but it goes unspoken. Vash is fairly certain it’s in Wolfwood’s mother tongue as well, but he doesn’t comment on it—bringing that up now would probably embarrass him enough to stop and Vash certainly doesn’t want that.
They're in bed together at some rundown inn—traveling too much with Vash in his current state puts a bit of a strain on both of them, so it’s easier if they make frequent stops. They just need to be careful. They have to be careful.
Wolfwood would never forgive himself if something happened to—
It’s almost unnerving to feel the faintest movement touch the skin of his cheek, stopping his train of thought immediately. It’s such a brief feeling and he almost questions if it actually happened, but Vash beats him to it.
“Nick, did you—?”
“Yeah,” Wolfwood glances up at him, unable to hide the awe in his voice. “He moved.”
 .
 150 years. A century and a half, and Vash did not know about this. 
To be fair, there is a lot about himself that he isn’t aware of, either purposely brushing it off as a one-off occurrence or simply refusing to acknowledge it. 
Plant anatomy wasn’t something he was keen to learn about. He understood his basic, primal needs and that was that. 
Humans, on the other hand…
Cross-species breeding simply never came to mind. And even if it did, Vash was far too busy enjoying the feeling of Wolfwood on top of him, holding him close, whispering things he longed to hear—knowing that each spoken word was true—he loves you, all of you, every single piece of your being, every scar and blemish branded from God himself.
(He loves you.)
 .
 “Oi, blondie—you want to tell me why you dragged me out here again?”
The dim lighting in the old saloon feels suitable at this moment, one of the lights flickering idly. It’s noisy, overcrowded and Vash almost reconsiders his priorities. 
“How ’bout a drink first?”
It’s not something Wolfwood refuses, but he eyes the glass of water that is placed on their shared table. It’s murky in color, with a few specks of dirt swirling around, but it’s better than what they have seen in the previous towns. 
Wolfwood grabs his own glass, filled with a smooth amber tinge. “So,” he takes a swig and licks his lips. “What’s wrong?”
Vash wants to laugh. Leave it to Wolfwood to get straight to the point. 
“Nothing! Well, mostly nothing,“ Vash gives him a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “You know how it is.”
Except Wolfwood doesn’t know, with the way Vash keeps skirting around the topic at hand. 
The alcohol in his system is beginning to warm him up, and if he didn’t know any better, he’d think Vash is about to say something unimaginable. It worries him.
There’s a ruckus outside the saloon that quickly enters through the double swing doors, men shouting unintelligible things—words like ‘bounty’ and ‘where is he?’ are all that Wolfwood needs to hear before he downs the rest of his drink and roughly grabs Vash by the arm. 
“Hey, wait—I didn’t get to finish my drink!” Vash whines dramatically as he stumbles to his feet. One of the men arguing with another patron glances over towards them and Wolfwood curses.
“Damn it! Will you shut it?” He swivels around and pulls Vash into a corner of the saloon, trying to obscure the view of the humanoid typhoon from any onlookers. Miraculously, it works.
The commotion dies down after the barkeep threatens to drain the tap and close up for the evening. Those who initially caused the uproar either slip back out into the night or decide it’s time for a drink.
Vash really wishes he could have one right now, too. The water on the table may not taste great, but his throat has never felt so dry.
His arms find their way around Wolfwood’s waist, and he holds him there for a moment, in the corner of that saloon. The lights flicker again.
“I need to talk to you.”
 .
 “Guess he likes my voice,” Wolfwood smooths a hand against the swell of Vash’s belly. 
“He?” Vash can’t hide the curiosity in his voice at the word, raising an eyebrow. “What makes you so sure?” 
“Spikey, there is absolutely no way in hell you’re giving me a daughter,” Wolfwood states it so seriously that Vash starts to laugh. “I mean it. My heart won’t be able to take it.” 
 .
 When he finally manages to tell Wolfwood what has been ailing him, he isn’t entirely sure what to expect, reaction wise.
Yelling or swearing? An average response, perhaps the best possible outcome, especially when it comes to the man Vash has known for so many years now. Calling him names falls under this category as well.
What he didn’t expect was the silence, or Wolfwood’s cigarette falling out of his mouth a second later. 
“You’re—”
Vash nods, unable to say anything else. It’s hard to meet those dark eyes that are glued to his body.
“And it’s…” Wolfwood trails off, motioning to himself.
Another nod. 
There’s a long pause before everything goes back to normal—whatever that actually is, Vash isn’t certain, but it feels like he can breathe again once Wolfwood regains his senses and finally says more than a few words.
“I thought you said we didn’t need to use condoms!” Wolfwood exclaims. “I asked you three times!”
Three separate times, in fact. Vash groans and runs a hand through his hair. “I mean, we don’t need to—we’ve never had—I didn’t think this was possible,” he settles on saying, because it’s true. 
This was purely impossible, and yet somehow, after 150 years, his body finally decided it was time. 
“With how often we fuck, I’m surprised this didn’t happen sooner,” Wolfwood mutters. 
He’s not wrong, as embarrassing as it is to think about it.
“So…” Vash wrings his hands together, eyes flickering between Wolfwood and the cigarette that has long since been forgotten on the ground. He moves his boot to step on it, putting it out. 
“So,” Wolfwood parrots, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “Are you okay? With all of this, I mean.”
“Me?” Vash blinks, confused. “I guess so, I was mostly worried about—”
He doesn’t get to finish his sentence before Wolfwood reaches over and pulls Vash into an embrace.
“Save it, blondie,” he says quietly. “You and I both know I’m fine with kids.” Wolfwood is also not wrong about that. 
“That’s not what I asked you.”
Are you okay with this? Is this what you want?
“I—yeah,” Vash lets out a shaky breath. “I really am.” He wraps his arms around Wolfwood’s neck and buries his face into his shoulder. “Thank you, Nick.”
For everything.
 .
 A daughter… she would look just like you, Nick, Vash thinks to himself while Wolfwood continues to argue with him—with their child. And she would act like you, too.
“I don’t need two needle-noggins in my life,” he says sternly, but there’s a hint of amusement in his voice. “So please inherit some damn common sense—”
“I have plenty of common sense,” Vash interrupts him. “For example—”
Wolfwood scoots his hand up underneath Vash’s t-shirt and squeezes the warm skin of Vash’s hip with a rough hand, eliciting a yelp out of him.
“Don’t say another word,” he grumbles, “unless you want me to knock more of that so-called sense into you.”
Vash’s smile is everything devious in nature. “I would love to see you try.”
 .
 The first time Wolfwood sees just how different Vash is as far as humans go, he’s equal parts aroused and surprised.
“You really weren’t kidding,” he says while trailing a finger across the inner part of Vash’s upper thigh, tracing a scar that mars the skin there. It stops just short of what he could only describe as thin, petal-like folds, tightly wound and—quivering? “This is pretty freaky, spikey.”
“Don’t tease me,” Vash all but huffs as his body is out on display for him. One too many drinks later and they find themselves in yet another unfamiliar, yet all too recognizable inn bedroom. 
It was easy for both of them to make it to this point—they always, always do, but this time it is different. It’s edging closer to something that neither one of them can turn away from.
Wolfwood grins at him. “Oh, I’m just getting started.”
 “Can you—y-yes, right there,” Vash’s calves tighten around Wolfwood’s shoulders instinctively, hands gripping the bed sheets beneath him. 
“Easy, Vash,” Wolfwood is a little breathless when he pulls back, a hand trailing along the metal of his prosthetic. “Digging into my neck a bit there.”
Vash almost immediately tries to sit up, looking extremely concerned. “Shit, I’m so sorry—”
Wolfwood carefully presses a hand to Vash’s lower abdomen, stopping him. “It’s fine, sweetheart,” he licks his lips. “Lie back down.”
His legs loosen a bit, this time more mindful of Wolfwood’s fleshy shoulders. Vash had insisted on leaving his prosthetics on, enjoying being able to anchor himself against his lover. 
Wolfwood continues where he left off, nose brushing the inner, wetter petals that are waiting for him, taking in Vash’s scent with a soft inhale. 
He flicks his tongue across them, watching as they unfurl and invite him into something far greater. 
���Nick—” Vash arches his back with a groan. “More, I—”
“More what?” Wolfwood murmurs it against the opening of his slit, lips finding their way around the swell of a small bud that is nestled between it. “Full sentences.”
“More, please,” Vash’s voice trembles, “Don’t fucking stop.”
“Language, sweetheart,” Wolfwood presses a kiss to the bud, nips at it gently with his teeth and proceeds to curl his tongue around it. 
He sucks long and slow, far too slow for Vash’s liking, evident in the way he hears another groan come from him. 
Vash’s hand reaches for Wolfwood’s hair, tugging as he rocks his hips closer.
“Oh, Nick,” he gasps this time and Wolfwood is certain that he’s close, noticing how the room begins to glow a touch brighter. 
Seeing those intricate patterns spark to life across various parts of Vash’s body ignites something truly deep within Wolfwood, far deeper than any spoken word of some higher being he could imagine.
They dance across scarred legs, skipping over pieces of well worn beryl-infused metal, trailing up Vash’s torso, his neck—
Vash shudders when he comes, fingers flexing into Wolfwood’s hair, purposefully forcing the man to stay put between his legs.
Not that Wolfwood would have ever minded.
He laps up everything that Vash gives to him and tries to coax out even more with his mouth, relishing the sweet taste that hits his tongue. 
“Still with me, darlin’?” Wolfwood breaks away from him with a quiet gasp. He brings a hand up to his lips and wipes at it, grinning. 
“Uh-huh,” is the only coherent response he gets, Vash’s body going limp with bliss. “’S good, Nick, you’re so good.”
“Preaching to the choir, I see,” Wolfwood runs a hand up Vash’s thigh, tracing along the intricate plant markings and noting how they shimmer brighter with each touch. “Let’s see what else that pretty mouth of yours can do.”
 .
 “How did the appointment go?” Wolfwood eventually asks, moving up to settle beside Vash. “Did Brad ask about—”
“The feathers,” Vash nods and sighs quite dramatically. “It was going so well, too, but then I sneezed and everything just,” he lifted up both his hands and spread his fingers, metal and flesh flexing wide, “Exploded?”
“Exploded?” Wolfwood can’t help but laugh. “Our child is already a menace, I can't believe it.”
One morning Vash had awoken to small, downy feathers attempting to sprout from his shoulders and forearm—the last time that happened, any time that happened, actually, was when they—
Well. Vash definitely didn’t relay that information to Brad, but he didn’t try to hide any of his bodily changes when he went for his most recent checkup. 
Luida suspected it had something to do with the pregnancy—that energy, a life, now being constantly generated from within him. He was bound to have some… interesting side effects.
“I couldn’t believe it,” Vash says after a moment. “You should’ve seen the look on Brad's face when it happened though, or the room,” he pauses and glances at Wolfwood with a smile. “Completely covered in feathers.”
Wolfwood snakes an arm across Vash’s chest, moving to rest his head on his shoulder. “Bet he loved that,” he closes his eyes. “Glad everything went smoothly, blondie. I should be able to come next time.”
Vash turns his head and presses a kiss to Wolfwood’s hair. “Luida would like that. She’s been dying to see you again, you know.”
“More like dying to have someone help out around the ship,” Wolfwood sighs, but there’s no malice in his tone. “Say, next time we visit…” he lowers his hand down Vash’s chest, stopping pointedly at his stomach. “They’ll be able to tell us what the little sprout is, yeah?”
Vash’s small intake of breath doesn’t go by unnoticed and it causes Wolfwood to sit up, getting a better look at him. “What’s wrong?”
“Well—” Vash starts to say, but closes his mouth promptly. 
“Wait,” Wolfwood reaches over to the side of the bed and suddenly the room is illuminated by the warm glow from the lamp. “Vash, don’t tell me you—” he glances back over at him and studies his face for a moment in silence. Vash desperately wishes Wolfwood wasn’t so damn good at reading him for once. 
“You already know, don’t you?” 
Vash groans and brings a hand up to his face. “It was an accident, Luida brought it up before I could stop her. I’m so sorry, Nick.” 
Wolfwood exhales and slumps back against the pillows. “Unbelievable.”
Vash attempts to roll over to face him, being on his back for so long starting to become a bit uncomfortable. “Nick?”
Silence. 
“Nicholas,” Vash pouts—he definitely has no right to do so, but he can’t help it. “I can just tell you, would that make it better?”
“No,” Wolfwood sighs. “I still want it to be a surprise.”
“I can act surprised when she tells us!” Vash says with enthusiasm. Wolfwood gives him a withering look. “No? Okay, okay,” he frowns, “it was worth a shot, though.”
“You are a complete needle-noggin idiot, you know that?” Wolfwood reaches over to flick Vash’s head. “And… it’s all right, don’t worry about it.”
“Are you sure?” 
“Yes,” Wolfwood stresses the fact with a poke to Vash’s cheek. “I can wait a few more weeks. You better not bring it up on accident, though, or else—”
“I won’t! I promise, scout’s honor!”
 .
 Wolfwood is a lazy kisser—Vash used to tease him for it, but it wasn’t as though he was much better—or had any practice.
And they really did have the time now for these sorts of things.
He sighs as Wolfwood peppers a trail of kisses up his chest, taking his time with each scar and meld of flesh and metal his lips come past. 
“Nicholas,” Vash’s voice is light, full of warmth. “I thought you said— oh!”
Wolfwood captured his mouth with ease, stopping whatever teasing comment that was about to be said. 
His lips are chapped, but still somehow soft, warm—Vash has half a mind to point that out, but Wolfwood won’t allow it with the way his mouth is working. 
Vash gives in and sighs into the kiss, tugs him closer, prosthetic fingers raking through Wolfwood’s hair. It’s enough of an incentive to keep going, by any means. 
Even if there is shouting outside the inn bedroom’s window, or the ringing of a few gunshots sounding off in the lingering desert air. 
Vash breaks the kiss to turn his head, ignoring how Wolfwood sets his aim for his throat.
“Should we go—mmh,” Vash tries to suppress a moan, unsuccessfully, “check that out?” 
Wolfwood pauses, lips lingering near Vash’s collarbone. “During the middle of this?” 
He has a point. 
And to further express said point, Wolfwood slowly rocks his hips along Vash’s thighs.
“You’re right,” and Vash can’t believe he’s saying it with a smile on his face, one that Wolfwood can’t see from this angle, but knows that the man can feel. 
The whole room is lighting up, after all.
“It can wait,” Vash decides, and Wolfwood takes him.
 .
 One minute of silence passes between them, and then two. 
“Okay, I can’t do this,” Wolfwood rolls over to face Vash. “’M not going to be able to sleep unless I know.”
Vash is unable to restrain himself from laughing. “Really? Surely there’s something in your good book about rewarding patience.”
“Always be humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love,” Wolfwood recalls the passage in a low voice. “I think I’ve been pretty gentle lately, all things considered.”
“Oh, absolutely,” Vash agrees, amused. “Not so humble, though. Might need some brushing up on that.”
Wolfwood slides a bit closer to Vash. “Good thing we’ll have some down time for the next couple of months then—I could use some practice.”
“I happen to know an excellent teacher,” Vash says. He feels Wolfwood snake an arm across underneath the blankets, reaching for his shoulder to pull Vash in an embrace. 
“If you say Brad, I swear to fucking God—”
Vash’s huff of laughter is the only response Wolfwood gets before a pale hand beckons him closer. 
Even in the now-quiet of the room, Vash’s whisper to his ear is perhaps the softest thing Wolfwood has heard in a very long time. 
He can’t help his too sudden reply, his own voice on the verge of cracking. “Really?”
Vash nods. “Yes, really.”
And if Wolfwood hid his face in the crook of Vash’s neck, eyes filled with a dampness that threatened to spill over and unable to say anything else except a murmured ‘thank you’—
It was enough. 
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