#i don't know what clicked in my brain but now everytime i see the doc i just think “DOC!!!!!!!!!!” and get the urge to tackle hug him :D

[articskele]

IF I HAD A NICKEL EVERYTIME I WANTED TO BE FRIENDS WITH A DUO OF CHARACTERS FROM A HORROR GAME, ONE BEING HUMANOID AND THE OTHER BEING A MONSTER WITH SHARP TEETH-

[tyunslove]

— a single pringle (proudly)

CHARACTERS . . . ryujin, mentioned yeji and lia

WARNINGS . . . suggestive themes (hs teenagers) , mentions of sex , being insecure and swearing

WORD COUNT . . . 0.6k (unedited)

GENRES/TROPES . . . aroace!ryujin , vent (??) fic , introspection , high-school memories , angst (??)

ryujin goes on a morning walk and introspects on romance.

the sun is shining high and bright. the tree branches sway gently along with the summer breeze, allowing leaves to travel with it. the sky is coloured a baby blue and clear of clouds. these things come together to paint the surroundings of ryujin's walk on a tuesday morning.

her black hair dances lightly in the wind, her black doc martens clicking and clacking— she grows addicted used to the sound, click, clack, click, clack— against the concrete sidewalk beside a local park.

her dark chocolate-coloured eyes wander in that direction to see an old man and woman sitting on a bench, holding hands as they feed birds with bits of bread.

she feels the wind of another duo pass by her, clearly trapped in their own world (if their laughing is a hint of anything).

on the other side of the road bustled with vehicles are a pair of pedestrians linked by the arm.

all of these people could've been couples, dating or engaged or married. she wouldn't know. she never had a romantic or sexual partner.

she wouldn't know.

she remembers high-school, with smelly and sweaty teenagers talking about crushes, love, sex (oh god the sex) and whatnot as if it was their life source. everytime a new couple got together, rumours spread like wildfire. suddenly everyone in school knew. suddenly everyone was telling them to use protection. suddenly everyone was asking each other how long they thought the couple would last.

the whole concept of dating and high-school sweethearts was something she never understood. her brain perceived it as something only existing in cheesy rom-com 2000s media.

she recalls her friends bugging her to get a boyfriend— 'ew no, why would i date anyone in this school?' she would think— and setting her up on blind dates with random guys from school. she would say 'not interested' and they would all be so disappointed ('it's not my fault i don't prioritise love at all so why are they looking at me like that?' she would wonder with insecurity).

everyone was in a relationship by the time she dropped out of high-school, training to become a idol. she felt less tense in a practice room instead of being with people eating each other's faces out. it became too much for her on some days.

but love was, and still is, everywhere. in her face. all the time. she HATES it. why in the ever-loving fuck would someone think it was a good a idea to have sex scenes in movies, zoom in on the kissing and have actors go through all that torture then walk out of the set in one piece?

at one point, it became too much so she vented to lia about it.

"have you heard of the word 'aroace' before?" was her response. she recalls herself and lia searching what it meant on the internet together. it was something along the lines of, 'being aroace means having little to no romantic and sexual attraction to anybody. it means not knowing how having a crush feels like, or how wanting to have sex feels like'.

she remembers thinking, 'THAT'S ME!!' she remembers feeling like her questions were answered. she remembers feeling euphoric.

now, she is content with her identity. she still loves people, but in a more familial and platonic sense. she may never understand romance and sex, but she is fine with never knowing.

she walks back to the dorms, keys jingling in her hand to unlock the door open. "i'm home!!" she shouts. yeji shouts back, "you missed breakfast!!" she always misses breakfast recently, she realises.

"sorry," she chuckles awkwardly. "it's fine, at least it's a free day." yeji replies, placing a sandwich on a plate before sliding it across the table to her. "thanks."

a sandwich is always good after introspecting, especially about romance.

this work belongs to © tyunslove. please do not translate or copy to another site. thank you.