#i don't KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!
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transgenderism dilemma
in the vein of that last post, i'm not sure what to do about my straight cis friends who keep referring to me as she. they are very supportive and they try their best to understand and i appreciate them so so much!!! but when i have other friends (some also trans and some cis but queer) who do make the effort to call me he or they (which i retired a while ago lowkey) , it's just kind of glaring when some of my friends still call me "she."
i know i told them any pronouns are fine and it doesn't bother me, but it kind of does. i don't want to go by "he" full-time, mostly because i'm more than a little nervous of being accidentally outed to people i'm not ready to be out to (my parents or some of my professors). but they're my friends. but i also know that if i tell these friends to call me "he" or even "they" (which still annoys me but at least gets them to acknowledge i am trans), i run a serious risk of them Not Understanding in front of someone i don't wanna be out to.
should i be this worried? should i have to go back and forth mentally about whether it's worth it to get gendered correctly by certain people when i know those people might potentially and completely accidentally out me?
i don't know. is it worth it? is it? to be gendered correctly or not to be. to be content with "they (sometimes) got the spirit." hm.
what do i DO??? do i even do anything?? AUGHHH!!!
#also still kinda annoyed with the fact that it feels like sometimes those friends don't see me like an adult if that makes sense#i think that's a me problem though#maybe i just need to be more clear when i'm making gay jokes and when i'm being serious#yesterday friends were talking about sex and i showed up and they were like we'll talk later and i was like oh what were you taking about#and they were like oh you'd think it's gross don't worry and i said oh you're talking about sex aren't you. i don't think sex is gross you#can go on!#like sure come on guys /i/ am iffy about sex when it comes to myself but on the whole it's just a topic#it exists#it's fascinating in a social science way! let me at least listen to your convo for science purposes lol#and then they kept talking and it literally wasn't even that bad#idk sometimes they just make me feel like The Gay Friend instead of. their friend who is also gay.#is that my fault? is that my failing? is that how i behave? should i change my behavior?#is this how i act around straight people friends? i don't know. i really don't.#in the meantime i guess it'll just grate on me and i'll be grateful for my friends who do refer to me how i want#sadly maybe these friends just aren't the closest to me and maybe it's okay if i let them keep thinking of me like this. like. incorrectly#i don't KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!
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ocd is wild like why am I forcing myself to form an opinion over a certain discourse and get so stressed over the fact that I genuinely don't know what I should think LIKE. MY PRIVATE OPINION LITERALLY WOULD HAVE NO EFFECT ON THE REAL WORLD AND IM HERE GOING INSANE
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I don't know I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww god it's a good thing I have therapy tomorrow
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god I just remembered I haven't even played Morrowind either. I could get both I guess
or I could save that money to have more for Armored Core soon
or I could just get neither and just wait for Fate/Samurai
ahhhh
I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww video games are too much
should I buy and play Skyrim for the first time. is that a thing you want to hear from me.
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Which female anon would you take on a date?
Ahh,,, again with the dating thing,,
#i don't... knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww....#dating is a weird topic ahaha...#maybe confetti... just because she's done so much for me#though i'm sure my family would again want me to go for luck... just because of her quirk.. ahh..#weird topic weird topic ahahaha...#Anonymous#ask tag
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I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww
I faintly remember last night but it was warm and comfy.... I really liked it.
But uh.
Why do I want more though? :<
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I DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
the blue man with the pawprint vest can be grilled very easily - his form is fleshy and beefy allowing easy consumption
his brother, on the other hand, is more lean. not as much as the red-haired one, but still lean
the girls have an equal amount of tenderness, however with the ponytailed girl she needs to have a cajun rub. the afro-haired one should suffice with a buffalo sauce
and, of course, nobody likes a grilled turtle...
THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN EASY FOR CONSUMPTION?????
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