#i don't KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!

[loverboybrightsideghost]

transgenderism dilemma

in the vein of that last post, i'm not sure what to do about my straight cis friends who keep referring to me as she. they are very supportive and they try their best to understand and i appreciate them so so much!!! but when i have other friends (some also trans and some cis but queer) who do make the effort to call me he or they (which i retired a while ago lowkey) , it's just kind of glaring when some of my friends still call me "she."

i know i told them any pronouns are fine and it doesn't bother me, but it kind of does. i don't want to go by "he" full-time, mostly because i'm more than a little nervous of being accidentally outed to people i'm not ready to be out to (my parents or some of my professors). but they're my friends. but i also know that if i tell these friends to call me "he" or even "they" (which still annoys me but at least gets them to acknowledge i am trans), i run a serious risk of them Not Understanding in front of someone i don't wanna be out to.

should i be this worried? should i have to go back and forth mentally about whether it's worth it to get gendered correctly by certain people when i know those people might potentially and completely accidentally out me?

i don't know. is it worth it? is it? to be gendered correctly or not to be. to be content with "they (sometimes) got the spirit." hm.

what do i DO??? do i even do anything?? AUGHHH!!!

[ineffag-swag]

ocd is wild like why am I forcing myself to form an opinion over a certain discourse and get so stressed over the fact that I genuinely don't know what I should think LIKE. MY PRIVATE OPINION LITERALLY WOULD HAVE NO EFFECT ON THE REAL WORLD AND IM HERE GOING INSANE

[berruornis]

I don't know I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww god it's a good thing I have therapy tomorrow

[toyota-supra]

god I just remembered I haven't even played Morrowind either. I could get both I guess

or I could save that money to have more for Armored Core soon

or I could just get neither and just wait for Fate/Samurai

ahhhh

I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww video games are too much

should I buy and play Skyrim for the first time. is that a thing you want to hear from me.

[titoist]

i think you are more fluent in english than i am, and its all i can speak!

thank you. imagine me, coyly blushing. i think i've reached a point where i really tend to not think much of my (purported*) proficiency in english, though it really was a cornerstone of my self-perception for awhile, in a really hubristic way - which i regret, looking back on, but find to have been sort of inevitable, keeping the C-C-C-Circumstances in mind. it's just something that sort of happened, autodidactically, & then kept happening as i fashioned english into my de-facto primary language starting from the age of 6. not that i don't think i should feel good about my knowledge of english.. it's just that i didn't really do much at all. like someone attempting to walk over an exposed manhole at the serendipitously exact time that a big grate is inadvertently hoisted up & transports them conveniently across it, & getting praised for masterfully dodging the manhole. aaahhhhh, i don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!! complicated complicated complicated. i do feel a little bit of latent (maybe a little cynical...) resentment towards all the native english speakers who don't even have to worry about ever knowing another language, though.

[ua-monoma]

Which female anon would you take on a date?

Ahh,,, again with the dating thing,,

[tenma-tsukasa-official]

I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I faintly remember last night but it was warm and comfy.... I really liked it.

But uh.

Why do I want more though? :<

[mochirizu]

I DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

the blue man with the pawprint vest can be grilled very easily - his form is fleshy and beefy allowing easy consumption

his brother, on the other hand, is more lean. not as much as the red-haired one, but still lean

the girls have an equal amount of tenderness, however with the ponytailed girl she needs to have a cajun rub. the afro-haired one should suffice with a buffalo sauce

and, of course, nobody likes a grilled turtle...

THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN EASY FOR CONSUMPTION?????