#i do not mean like liking a popular thing or being statistically common ofc. i mean unique kind of empty.

[psychelis-new]

sometimes i dont know how we are expected to enjoy something in this economy or in modern society where people seem to only really care if its about a rich person or someone whos popular or pretty and attractive. for instance if celeb passes away its such a huge deal but if its one of us it doesnt matter so much cause we dont matter or only a few handful of people would miss us compared to a celeb. or that society is so much about what someone does and how much they make from it that i feel soulless like theres so many folk who say do something bc it make u money not bc it make u happy.

im really conflicted nowadays and i dont like the state my country is in, it doesnt care about it citizens but it care more about the royals than anyone else every tome w royal member breaths they get free press but any time someome normal does something it never gets the same reception. as i said i dont think it matters anymore who does or doesnt live a long life bc it only matters what they did as a person or how society is constantly about having a following or likes comments and subscribes or is it the fact that screens are being used everywhere?

honestly i think this is the worst version of society. i dont want to have to chase people only for them to barely give effort in return but thats what i feel like i have to do bc society has its cliques online and offline. i hope this rant makes some sense and thank you v much for letting me rant!

Hello dear :) Well, there's a lot here...

Despite I understand what you mean, it's also about statistics: famous people are known by far more people than "common" (let me use this adjective, even if it's not right) people, so it's obviously natural that more people can be aware of their existence and cry over one of them passing away compared to one person known only by 20-30 people or less: famous people have the chance to "keep in touch" with/be seen by many people at the same time through what they do, cause all they do has a resonance caused by the ability they have to move markets and create capitals as well (mostly because of "common" people being so invested in them, js). For this reasons their lives are under the lenses of the world: not that good in the end, as their privacy is basically non-existant; they're supposed to share everything about them, cause people wants to know everything about them and compare their lives to the ones of those famous people: if they go through lows, "common" people may feel better about themselves, or see famous as more "normal"; in the best case we just can get inspired by famous people (maybe they made a dream come true and so we hope to be able to do the same somehow). It's very tough cause it's not just about love, but they get also hated and envied far more easily and by far more people than "common" people: again it's about statistics.

The thing to keep in mind here imo is: it's not about quantity, but quality. One can be loved by the whole world but it doesn't mean everyone will remember them forever (and also, it depends on how and why they will: it's not always for something positive or good). Focus on you and your own personal relationships, on making them good enough so that even if just one person will care about and remember you, it will be more than enough cause it will be for the right reason. And that's what matters in the end (imo, ofc).

Life these days is easily influenced by fake lives we see online through social medias: all is buildt up so that it can look amazing (think photographs and AI as well). Many people (not just influencers) try to avoid sharing the "bad" part but only focus on the good and so the idea that everything must be perfect to be good and there's no way one can go through lows in life is something that is playing with the mind of many, making them think their lives are just terrible because they cannot make it good or make enough money (what is enough even? Everything costs more and more, so the fear of running out of money may make people fear living in poverty and need to make more money: no matter if they aren't happy as long as they're safe -it's about the root chakra yk-. For example esp. in the Southern area of my country, not having a secure job is unsafe for many elders, they may push their children to work in State's offices even if they don't want to, so that they will be sure they'll get paid all the months). All this is just adding a stress that is totally unnecessary: as you're noticing, not feeling supported in our choices by those in an "authority spot" (be it family or state letting us down more or less figuratively) is not going to help us find happiness or even wealth (what one can consider it made of). And seeing other making it (famous people for instance), may make us envious of them. Resentful even.

I don't think there's someone living the perfect life, we all go through bad stuff, it's just a matter of how we decide to deal with it and how much we share. Many pretend it's not real and try to forget about it by focusing on whatever else, and even on other people (=famous people) but it doesn't work in the end: fake positivity or avoiding negativity never solved any problem. But this is where famous people come in: seeing good/positive posts and being pushed to believe that something good can be (as it will), or even just being comforted by someone we admire can be of help for those going through a bad moment. On the other side, by showing the best side of stuff, some influencers (eg.) may try to convince us to interact with them also to know more about them or to see if their life are really better and how we can be like them... but they mostly do that to gain something. We're still talking about a job (social media in particular, but remember every famous person also generally gains from their appearances and image): followers and interactions of any type with an account, help them reach certain numbers in the algorythm of that specific social media, get viral or become famous/known enough so that they can start collaborations and gain more. And live (they try to make money as well as anyone else: ofc it depends what idea we have of how they make money and how much we know of it). This too has lows ofc, as everything, but we may not always know about them unless the person wants to share about it.

What I mean is: yes society has f-up rules and ideas, it's pretty much corrupted, but it's not famous people the real problem imo. Maybe "common" people just find in them a way to escape their reality (be it for the best or the worst, to send love or hate; maybe they just project, find comfort, avoidance... whatever other need they have unmet), as I was saying. Maybe they just find online (reels/tiktok in particular, fast and entertaining stuff for a life that goes fast and people's decreasing attention span caused by generally feeling low and not being able to keep up with that pace and ending up alone/left out ig) the entertainment they need to unwind and that they cannot find in their lives: they need to look outside, to not think about themselves. I think that until we look at what goes on outside instead of inside (whether it's to find validation or support or whatever else we need and were never given), there's not much that we can change in our lives. I am not demonzing famous people by any means (nor juding "common" people's behaviours): it's part of their job to be there and act as a trigger (at times) for others, but that's not always a pleasant job in the end: what I mean is, maybe we don't have to blame them for what is going on as their lives have pros but also many many cons we need to consider, understand and respect. In their place many people may not be able to deal with the stress and all and give up easily (don't wanna talk about the many famous people giving in to various addictions because of this).

But if you feel like because of society you need to act in a certain way to be accepted and you need to accept crumbs in your relationships, then that's wrong imo. You are free, don't let society cage you into unreasonable rules. You can make your own rules: you may feel alone at first, but you're not going to be forever. There are other people like you. You deserve much more than crumbs and you deserve to at least try to live the life you dream of living. Try to stop for a moment and realize what is this confusion you're experiencing really about. What do you see in the way famous people are treated and what you make it mean of you in comparison (despite I generally don't suggest to compare with others for this but ...yeah)? Do you feel not enough? Do you feel rejected? Underappreciated? Not seen? Idk... Do you really know what you want for yourself and how to get it? If not, start from the basic, see what you really want and need, and work to obtain it. Whatever goes on around you.

Not sure if I said all I wanted to say but I guess I touched the main points at least... Take care<3

[trashangel-dee]

This is probably gonna be a little messy, but I just have to get it out. This hasn’t been proofed, so sorry for mistakes

It’s mostly going to be the Charlie/Dee thing, but it will tie in to the majority of the episode. 

I’m not justifying or excusing anything. 

Most followers and mutuals know I’m big on this “ship”. It hurt at first. And I still feel really gross about it. Looking now, it doesn’t really change how I see them. ofc, I do some, but not significantly. As much fun as it is to speculate and write/ read fic, I dont expect or want an official relationship with pet names and hand holding.It is fun to imagine these terrible dumb-dumbs try to navigate something healthy and normal. I’ve been drawn to this pairing from early on. Their friendship hasn’t really changed. Charlie hasn’t acted uncomfortable around Dee, and is still okay with close proximity and casual touching. Not to compare/bring him up, but look at his interactions with uncle jack. Even the “me too” coincidence/ ‘joke’ at the end, Charlie was the first to laugh and look impressed at her. They have their smoke breaks. Charlie moved to sit next to her in HoHC.

While I think that going from a very sweet moment to that is very important to bring to people’s attention, I think it still would be easier to handle if it had been a second time deal. We’ve had 3 years to think about how Glenn and Rob were planning a very long, consensual, intimate scene that this now is very jarring and hard to accept. It was supposed to be awkward and funny to watch, but even the latest reveal is going to the opposite of a comedy scene. While I appreciate them hitting on ‘consent can end at any time. and that just because someone initiated something, doesn’t mean they have to finish it’, I think making it into a ‘tried a second time but Charlie backed out this time’ would’ve been less shocking since we don’t have as much context and investment in it. It would hit on ‘just because it happened once doesn’t mean it’s an okay for every other time.’

What really bothers me is how they bonded in the diner and for music and def poetry and that sort of comfort and trust was broken. Also in an interview years ago, Rob said “these characters are sad, pathetic and in pain” and I get they are some of the worst people on the planet, it’s hard to see them hurt more.

What I find interesting is how Charlie brings it up as an excuse for his behavior with the waitress, that being molested/ sexually assaulted makes it okay because he’s been a victim, too. Saying how he “get(s) a free pass”. Even though he’s been doing all that creepy and inappropriate stuff well before Misses the Boat aired. I’m not justifying this, merely pointing out that it was another good point to hit on.

The gang’s reaction was interesting to me- Mac and Dennis only seem to care that they had sex and barely have a reaction to whether or not it was consensual.Maybe it’s because they know of her past with men, or because they have trouble seeing outside their tight knit little group and the delicate balance they try to keep. They don’t insult Dee (such as call her desperate or a whore) or over react with concern for Charlie having been with a bird or someone so gross.

I’m not excusing or victim blaming or anything, but  Dee seems surprised by the revelation, almost like she had forgot that they had been together or that that type of stuff is normal for her. Dee being more of the ‘leader’ and sort of fierce with men is a popular hc, and while it’s not as empowering in this situation, I think it’s more of to be expected from her. Charlie seems surprised as well- the lady says that “women can sexually harass and even rape a guy. is that what happened here?” and his reaction is sort of ‘oh wow. i guess’, which almost parallels the Mac/Dee interaction in the role-play, when the man tells them that lifting her like that is sexual assault. Though she’s faking for the attention/authority, she says “now that I got a little distance from the event...” Though they’re different situations, both seemed to have needed it brought to their attention. 

Something I noticed is how Dee essentially says “I,a woman, can’t assault you, a man.” However in “Dee Made a Smut Film” she tells Dennis that he was in fact raped in hs, and when he says a women can’t do that to a man, she corrects “an older woman can rape a younger man.” Dee knows it can happen, but seems to think age has some affect on it. I know it’s with a minor/ s1, but Dee isn’t okay with sleeping with the hs kid. 

Dee’s behavior at the seminar is great. She starts out excited for the seminar, seeming to expect to watch the guys be roasted while she’s in the clear even though she’s completely aware of “the insinuation”. She then moves into wrongly using the ‘power’ she has, which some men have commented on being afraid of. It then ends with Dee realizing that she’s no better than anyone and is part of the problem, too.

Things get more random here/ stuff I noticed but don’t know how to articulate:

When Dennis tells Mac to stop touching and kissing him because he’s uncomfortable with it, he adds “it’s never gonna happen”. Dennis absolutely knows that Mac wants more. That It took it from sort of puppy love to seemingly breaking him down.

Charlie also mentions that he was intimidated by her large frame, which seems unusual for him. It’s also a common insult and a throwback to Mac and Dee earlier. While I get this is a different context for their behavior, it’s rare to see Charlie intimidated by Dee. Even in “Dee Gives Birth” he comments that Ben needs to stand up for himself. While I believe Charlie did try some, and I’m not blaming him again, but it shows that saying and doing are different things and one needs to be put in that situation.

Dee does what challengers call a grey area- what she thinks is a compliment and helpful, rubbing the woman’s shoulders and complimenting her breasts, is considered sexual harassment.

Dee flirting with Cricket 11-12 years ago is what got him in this looks situation now. 

I think revealing her habits happened to Charlie hurts and feels like it went over the line some. Showing pictures and names of her victims would have been a different type of effective in the presentation. 

What really stings is that type of stuff happening to Charlie twice. By two people who he’s close to. Which is common statistics, but it still crushes me.

Everyone already said and knows this, but the gang never learns or changes. They just need ways to keep it more secret.