#i didnt know how to end this post sorry
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m4ndysk4nkovich · 1 year ago
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lip and ian / frank and monica
i have so many feelings about them- specifically in 7x08. that episode was very ian and lip, and i think the best part of that episode was this still of ian’s face after lip grabs him and screams at him
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his face here is barely visible but it’s so telling. he’s breathing heavily and in shock and overall just seems almost scared. and like, i get it, i would react the same way because who wouldn’t, but something about the way he looks at lip reminds me of this
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and i just know that he saw a little bit of frank in lip when he did that. maybe he thought of the story lip told about frank being sober when they were 9 & 10 and then going back to being a drunk, maybe for a second he just associated that with lip.
and not like this was purposeful (or was it?) but ian’s literally wearing the same shirt just in a different color.
lip isn’t frank, just like how ian isn’t monica. they both know this, but still the way they look at their parents vs at each other is similar.
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(lip looking at monica when she was manic)
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(lip looking at ian when he was manic)
or take lip’s monologue about ian from season six for example,
“you know, he thinks
 being bipolar means he’s doomed to be a piece of shit like our mother. maybe it’s true.” “maybe it’s not.”
and just the whole dummy & alcoholic gene thing from season 1 made it so clear that something would happen to both of them.
and the fact that ian is always told he looks like monica and lip is always told he looks like frank, it’s just soul crushing.
and they both date people like their parents. ian dates older guys to fill the void frank created. lip dates unstable (usually blonde) women to fill the void monica created.
in ways, they are like their parents.
both frank and lip were academically smart, both of them were poor but had promising futures, and both of them are attracted to craziness/crazy women. (plus they’re alcoholics).
both monica and ian are caring people. they both have been used by people, specifically used in a sexual way. they’re both queer. (and they’re both mentally ill).
but the similarity between the two brothers is that they want recovery. they don’t want to be like their parents. ian wants his stability back. lip wants his sobriety back. monica was unmedicated, frank was beyond repair, but lip and ian wanted to change and they didn’t want the lives that frank and monica lived.
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ew-selfish-art · 1 year ago
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Dpx Dc AU: Ectoplasm is required for Ghosts to be visible to the human eye- And Danny creates his own ectoplasm.
Danny is visiting Jazz in Gotham and its weird how friendly everyone is. Like, the city gets a really bad rapport, everywhere he goes there is someone trying to strike up a conversation or answer his questions about getting around to the tourist spots. A few people even pointed out restaurants and ways to find off the beaten path gems! Jazz seems to role her eyes at him, but when he brings up her 'roommate' being kind of cute she flat out laughs.
Danny then comes to understand the Jazz doesn't have a roommate and that Ghosts in Gotham don't move far from their haunts- He's just been inadvertently turning these undead folks visible by accident of generating abnormal amounts of ectoplasm.
Which, is comforting in a way, he's never walking this dangerous city alone and really, most of the ghosts have been really friendly! They disappear once he's a few blocks away from them anyway.
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Tim Drake is having a horrible day.
He'd been given intel that one of Black Mask's guys was going to snitch but that he'd died before given the opportunity to reach out to the GCPD. He tracks down the guy's last know whereabouts and yikes. Its next to the Theater. Tim was often grateful for his childhood obsessions, this time it backfired.
Tim and Bruce get into an argument about trust and respect and, worst of all, mental health. And even though Tim was vehemently against Batman accompanying Red Robin to the alleyway - that's exactly what happens.
They arrive and Bruce is closing up faster than a clam in the contaminated Gotham Bay- Clearly being in the Alley bothers him. No fucking shit. RR gets started on collecting evidence, there are a few extra blood splatters and a single left shoe... When a kid walks into the Alley.
"Uh, sorry to intrude-" The kid looks scared shitless, and runs away. And then, all of a sudden, Batman and Robin aren't alone in the Alley.
Tim can hardly believe his eyes as the dead man appears and quickly blabs Black Mask's bank passwords and what the plan had been- and While he's over joyed to have that closure, he turns around to Batman weeping in the arms of his parents.
The ghosts fade, and the emotions are certainly charged as this was never something Bruce or Tim would have ever dreamed of happening. Ghosts in Gotham. Talking, floating, granting closure.
"RR, Bats, come in." Oracle calls into their ears.
"Reporting in, but, uh, we need a minute."
"A minute? We have a case on 4th and-"
"O, we just saw the ghosts of the Waynes. It's going to be a minute."
"...Lots of Ghost reports lately then. Any chance you saw a kid looking like he could be adopted?"
"Yeah, actually, black hair and blue eyes. He was super polite before he ran away."
"We have work to do. Oracle, lets prioritize finding our person of interest and divert Nightwing and Robin to the case on 4th." Batman cut between them on the comms and he sounded... calmer than either of them anticipated.
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Jazz is no longer laughing when Batman appears at her door explaining that he's looking for Danny (Who already flew away from town to get a good night's sleep before class on Monday). Turns out Danny reunited the man with his dead parents just briefly- and then the second guy appears and mentions how Danny had also given a guy who'd been murdered by a Mob enough time to explain the ongoing threats the city faced.
Jazz just rolls her eyes and says that it's not like the ghosts are going anywhere anytime soon and Danny will visit in another month. When pressed, she just explains that her brother is a weirdo. No of course he doesn't have powers. Gaslight and Girlbosses her way out.
And Jazz thinks that the game is up for at least another month, obviously when Danny visits more shit will stir up, but then this new guy appears.
Unlike the other Bats who are keen on watching her from a distance, the Red Hood knocks on her door. Are her eyebrows all the way into her hairline when Red Hood asks her to send his thanks along to Danny because somehow this whole situation led to his Dad expressing remorse for his actions and apologizing? Yes, yes they are.
But Jazz can smell Dissertation Data off of these vigilantes- Who is she to send them away? Jazz welcomes Red Hood into her place for a cup of tea and a small chat.
The story then devolves into Jazz getting shit done, Danny being cute by proximity and also bringing ghosts to the party, and the Bats having trauma resolve between them.
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firestorm09890 · 1 month ago
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Y'ALL. Y'ALL so for a long time I've believed that "the sun" in Meursault's story is Carmen, and I went to check Hell's Chicken's dialogue to see exactly how he said that he'd dealt with distortions before, and... you know what else he said?
To my knowledge, it is a phenomenon where an individual morphs into a form often unfit to be considered “human”. It has no known causes, and the appearances were all different.
Unfit to be considered human.
Meursault, who, in his book, was judged by the court to be soulless.
Meursault, who has EGO for Cyborgs who have been so mutilated they barely act like people anymore; a murderer who was experimented on until ceasing to be human; a sheep named after Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, a novel about the humanity of androids and the inhumanity of humans; and now a rose that can't help its bloodsucking nature, based on Carmilla, a vampire whose story emphasized the duality between her vampiric traits and her human ones.
Meursault, who answered Heathcliff's ironic question of if he had metal for brains like this:
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I'm placing my bets now, that line from Hell's Chicken is foreshadowing for Meursault's canto even more than "I have witnessed a number of [distortion] cases in the past" was
#limbus company#project moon#meursault#sorry of my info on carmilla is off i still havent read the book#me post#CLARIFYING IN THE TAGS: MEURSAULT IS HUMAN#it would be a disservice to his character and honestly pretty gross if he ended up not being human#the entire point is that he IS human and that other people perceive him as otherwise because of how he behaves#so I guess theoretically if he did distort it would exacerbate the issue?#extremely speculative but there are distortions who can behave pretty normally while distorted#like the marksman of the mist (and also some of the reverb ensemble but those people are all full of issues WAYYY bigger than marksman was)#if meursault was one of those...#someone calling him unfit to be human. it's fine it definitely won't leave a scar on his psyche#i think in his canto there might end up being something about how even though people don't see distortions as humans#distorting is a very human thing to do#anyway i think overall there's juxtaposition with him and don quixote#don isnt human and wishes she could be#meursault is human but people don't think he is#yknow despite my theories it would probably be more poignant if he DIDNT distort#them looking at him and assuming he only couldve done something like that if he distorted but he didnt#oh wait but the timeline... they probably wouldn't have known about how distorting works yet#nevermind back to the first idea#they ask why. he talks about a beautiful voice. no one knows about this yet and they all think there's something deeply wrong with him#'a beautiful voice convinced me' holds up in court about as well as 'the sun was too bright'
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ganondoodle · 2 months ago
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i keep writing those big text posts either complaining or trying to explain my own behavoir- but really what im trying to say is
"sorry i am so quickly irritated and too depressed to draw, theres many stressful things happening IRL and my only escape from it via my hyperfixation has also become stressful bc of things being done with it that i dont like and never expected, thus having a hard time dealing with anything"
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gingerjolover · 1 year ago
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Julien with the prompt "I can't risk losing you again." <3
hi baby! i combined this with 2 other #30 w julien asks as well as two asks that requested a haunted house mini fic (i hope that's ok mwah)
wc: somewhere around 775 (short king!)
julien baker x fem!reader - #30 "I can't risk losing you again."
The orange and green strobe lights do nothing to help pave your way through the dark hallway, the panic rising in your chest as actors in horrifying makeup jump out, just barely grazing your shoulders and hips. This was not how the night was supposed to go.
5 minutes ago, Julien's hands were on your hips, your fingers interlocked with Phoebe's as she walked in front of you; Lucy in front of Phoebe, Billie behind Julien, your other friends scattered sporadically, effectively sandwiching you between them as you walked through the haunted house.
Signing a release was the first sign that this was not a good idea.
The second was the orange wristband Julien insisted you ask for as a precaution. “Do not separate," stamped on the outside.
Yet here you were, like a mouse in a maze, trying to maneuver through the twisting hallways, the exit nowhere in sight.
You swear you can hear Lucy's scream, but she doesn't sound near or far. The best thing you can do is hide in the corner, recalling the moment an actor with "melting skin" popped up out of the floor, your entire group scattering in different directions; you felt Phoebe's hand slip from yours, Julien getting pushed into a different direction behind you.
It feels like there's no way out; your breathing gets heavier, and the corner comforts you with promises that nothing can come up behind you. Your back slides down the wall, eyes squeezing shut, hands to your ears to drown out the screams and cackling.
You don't know how long you sit there before two cold hands grab your body, one on your ankle and the other near your cheek. You're instantly screaming, kicking, and pushing the hands away.
"Baby... hey, hey! Babe! Hey! It's me, It's Jule...ow don't kick me," Julien says loudly, grabbing your wrists. Your eyes try to focus on her face, the strobe lights behind her washing her out. You instantly wrap your arms around her shoulders, small sobs leaking out of your eyes, her hands moving to support your lower back. "Shh, sweet girl, I know, I'm sorry...I'm so sorry baby..." your tears soaking into her flannel jacket. She pushes you away softly so she can see your face, wiping your eyes as she presses apologetic kisses to your cheeks.
"You left me," you say softly, voice thick with emotion. Julien's heart cracks; your wobbly tone and slight rasp fill her with guilt, even if it was an accident. "I would never leave you on purpose, princess. I got shoved to the left, and when I turned around, you were gone..." Julien says sympathetically, the music getting louder, groups of screaming teens and young adults passing you where you're both hidden in the corner of a long hallway.
"C'mon, let's get out of here," Julien says, cradling your arms and helping lift you up. Julien aggressively grabs your belt loops, tugging you to her front, your back hitting her chest harshly, "Ow, don't be so rough," you grumble, already feeling anxious.
"I can't risk losing you again," Julien says, leaning close to your ear. She places a few kisses on your hair before you start to walk through. You've walked for a few minutes when Julien pushes herself in front of you, choosing to lead you, facing whatever is ahead of you first. She has you grab her belt as an anchor, walking quickly, telling you to keep your head down. It was like Julien had gotten familiar with the layout while you were separated, reaching the exit easily and with only 12 panicked screams from you.
As soon as you get out, Julien's face goes from determined to pissed, her eyebrows furrowing as she steps away and puts her hands on her face. "You have a fucking wristband, how did none of the actors attempt to-"
"Julien, please just... can you just hold me for a sec?" you ask, slightly panting, the adrenaline coursing through your body quickly.
Julien's eyes soften instantly, moving back towards you, "Yeah pretty girl, I- I'm sorry," before wrapping you up in a hug.
Phoebe comes rushing out, face flushed and eyes wide, a small smile lifting on her face in relief when she’s the two of you.
"Thank fuck, there you are," Phoebe says, moving to you quickly. Julien steps back and allows Phoebe to pull you into a bone-crushing hug. "I went back in because when we all got separated, I couldn't find you or Julien. Billie and Lucy got out but went over to ask the worker to find you because of the wristband and-"
"Pheebs I'm fine," you breathe out, a little overwhelmed at Phoebe's out-of-character quick and panicked speech. "Julien found me," you say softly.
"She kicked me," Julien says deadpan.
"Why did you kick her?"
"Phoebe, I couldn't fuckin see anything!”
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mintypsii · 6 months ago
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sanuso runaway AU - where Usopp leaves syrup village after his mom dies to look for his dad and ends up at the germa kingdom, growing up with Sanji as the doctor's lab assistant
That's basically the gist of it, there's a LOTT more but I just wanted to share some of the art I made for it (came up with it with a friend of mine)
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In short -> sogeking is usopp's clone (the kids aren't aware of this) and was created to help germafied sanji on missions (sanji's scores began to improve after he met usopp so judge decided to keep him for more infiltration or espionage based tasks, hence "stealth black" since he's considered weaker than his siblings)
reiju's here too :) she and sanji have a bit of a rocky relationship (it gets better!!) but she's besties with usopp and hangs out with him at the lab to make ,, various concoctions
I'll make another post with more art and info later (I HAVE A LOTTT) so i'll tag em with (#op runaway au) hehe ,, feel free to send asks about it too!!
EDIT: HE FINALLY GOT A TUMBLR @arttlars !!!!!!! blame him for all of this
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mizzical · 3 months ago
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F it, im compiling all my dra sketches below because i kind of miss drawing dra stuff
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wildstar25 · 8 months ago
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MiqoMarch Day 23 - Midnight
With their intended voyage into the void only a few days out, Arsay thought it the upmost importance that she steal her partner away to Kugane, that they might share one more fond memory together should things not turn out the way they plan in the thirteenth. It was as they crossed the very same bridge the miqo'te had once sat on together two years prior when Arsay gifted Y'shtola with a bracelet matching that of her own. A token of endearment which, Arsay confessed, she would have given to her fellow scion back then, had nerves not gotten the best of her. While their relationship has undoubtedly changed since the initial purchase of the jewellery, the sentiment remained the same. Y'shtola was someone who Arsay loved dearly and she will forever be grateful to have the seeker's life intertwined with her own. No matter where their free spirits took them, they would always hold each other in their hearts. A promise Y'shtola was more than willing to keep. She slipped the the string of beads around her wrist without a second thought. They were never to come off, not even when the two decided to delay their return to Radz-at-Han in favour of a private bath at the dead of night.
#miqomarch#miqomarch 2024#ffxiv#y'shtola rhul#y'shtola x wol#wolshtola#arsay nun lore#arshtola#thanks to nhaneh for the body mod#i had to do some insane fov to get the moon and them in the same shot so sorry for the distortion#forcing arshtola lore into this prompt since idk when Ill ever get around to gposing the actual scene#this is between 6.1 and 6.2!#endwalker patch spoilers#i had the idea that arsay bought the Dai-ryumyaku bracelets from a vendor between 4.3 n 4.4 when shtola is off to the doman enclave#and arsay is like hey wait you should let me show you around kugane on the way over!#a fun friend date that ends with shtola finally accepting she has a crush on arsay and its terminal#and arsay having a single moment where she starts reflecting on feelings & thinks maybe she missed hanging out w/shtola more than she shoul#only to quickly butt that idea out of her head and continue being super normal#arsay notices these matching bracelets with red and purple string and shes like oh they are so cute and they look like#they belong in a pair it would be so sad if they were ever split up unexpectedly#i know ill buy them and give one to shtola wouldnt that be fun!#so she does that and then cant bring herself to give yshtola the damn thing because she starts second guessing herself#so arsay stashes the bracelets away and she started wearing hers later under her glove#fast forward to two years later and arsay finds the other one in one of her bags#and now shes dating yshtola and they are about to go somewhere super dangerous#what better time to tell your gf how much they have always meant to you#and what better way to do it than with a gift and some words spoken from the heart?#it was a little unconventional since arsay didnt really have marriage on the mind but it was a proposal in a sense#WOL posting#Arsay Nun
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mochiiniko · 11 months ago
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skitskatdacat63 · 1 year ago
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Hey do you remember all those videos of Fernando smelling flowers? Haha yeah....
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#posting this both while im asleep and after whatever bee event ends up happening#so who knows what will happen! will we get nothing? will we get eye contact? will we possibly get an interaction? its a surprise!!#anyways this is basically me hearing about seb's bee event and he said the drivers will be there#me deep in my vettonso brainrot: OH MY GOD THEY'RE GONNA BE IN THE SAME VICINITY#will be so funny for me if when i wake up i find out fernando didnt even go 😭#but we remain hopeful 🙏#also this is just very funny to me bcs like both seb and fernando have very specifc quirks#and what are two of their specific quirks? seb and his bee thing. fernando and his flower thing from this season#so this fanart is perfect y'know đŸ„°đŸ„°đŸ„°#also screeching over how this is the first canon au drawing ive ever drawn. ive literally never drawn non-au until now 💀💀💀#okay and now some horrible jokes thay happened during the process of this:#thesis of this drawing: whats Fernando gonna do? Pollinate him? 😏#C. why did you have to make me think of bees that produce sex pollen 😭😭 this is gonna haunt me forever. but also vettonso post-japan fic-#and then also the barry benson thing. im like what do humanized bees look like and then realized 'oh no....oh no.'#fernando to seb at the bee event: 'ya like samurais...?' SORRY 😭#also having to pick the colors from one of my historical au drawings was haunting. just the sheer difference btwn them yknow......#anyways please take my old men yaoi. took a break from historical yaoi to draw this 😭😭😭😭#this is my peak vettonso fanart cannot improve from here. also a fever dream#vettonso#f1#formula 1#sebastian vettel#fernando alonso#catie.art.#*not gonna edit the tags bcs i like the time capsule of it all but like. yeah. we were fed.#*catie from 2 hours prior(atm its 3 am) would be so pleased right now i think
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hauntingblue · 7 months ago
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making a collection
making another collection with a threatening aura
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#davy back fightbpart 3 letsgo#HOW do the three big guns get wasted on the eating contest... horrible plan.... luffy is fine bc well... but not sanji and zoro like damn.#luffy DOESNT WANNA EAT??? CALL THE NAVY!!!!#what was i saying.... bad idea putting the three beasts there#FRANKY FRANKY FRANKY!!!! they captured the two princesses :(#one sided beef squashed between luffy and foxy. friendship ended with random ex marine guy. now luffy is my best friend#usopp and franky bonding time hell yeah. throw usopp by the head once more pelase#nami with zoros swords just like holding them looks so cool like she should get a few swords too... nami three sword style oda drawing pls#i think this man underestimates nami and luffys power together he doesnt know about shiki#luffy saying he knows its a trap and sorry for being late.... lets go on an adventure all nine of us.... usopp yes anding his lie..... omg#cant believe nami isnt there yet. she could take this guy. oh there she is!!!!! she does look cool with the swords and jumping to get luffy#zoro screaming in agony from luffy getting shot omg THIS FUCKING GUY OF COURSE!!! this looks like its so over#zoro and sanji must feel so useless rn. they didnt even get the chance to fight like damn#komei-kakka??? more like come caca. boom#luffy face down dead on the floor akdjkaa chopper have you tried looking at the wound to see if it harmed him idk#it hit the face akdjskn usopp that was coom also#was robin flirting with the other guy and zoro caught her and she told hum to shut up???#'your friends got the best of me but you are still in my arms an-' 'HEAT EGG!! ALSO YOU'RE ON FIRE!'#flare maneauver that was so slay also luffy and nami in the same frame so twins of them. my children. birthed them one right after the othe#zoro and sanji fighting back to back. back to back to back to you i dont wanna fall right back to us maybe you should run right back to her#that is such a bop song. also post wano zosan. and post wci. see the recurrent theme#fighting in water.... being on top of the sword that was a slay... red hawk ace i will never forget you it seems#foxy liking his jolly roger omg nami fooled him ahdhsjs i think they should have pirate game event every year they yearn for contests#now since this experience foxy should make monthly multitudinary pirate games olympics hoping the strawhats join them a la gatsby#the faces at the mushroom akdhaksjs#talking tag#watching one piece#watching one piece movies#kinda loved how robin betted on franky against usopp.... i will take the crumbs
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liquidstar · 8 months ago
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a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
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camzverse · 4 months ago
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apologizing in advance for the person i will become when the next pjo show season comes out
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oceanwithouthermoon · 10 months ago
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"toxic yaoi" this, "healthy yaoi" that, WHAT ABOUT JUST PLAIN MESSY YAOI.
boy A, boy B, and boy C are all mutually in love but A has decided to only pursue B because he thinks being in love with TWO people is weird and he knows C is very closed off, but B is the one with the heaviest internalized homophobia so its really difficult.. C sees A courting B and is like "guess im fucked, no chance with either of em" and avoids the other two like the plague, but B is also trying really hard to avoid A when he realizes whats going on because hes scared of getting in a relationship with him and thinks that if/when hes forced to directly reject him then he'll lose him even just as a friend, so hes trying to seek out C as much as possible so that he'll have at least one of his loves when he loses the other.. A realizes B is avoiding him, and now hes ALSO seeking out C, not to pursue him but for comfort and because he thinks hes lost B.
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ambalambs · 6 months ago
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End of Endwalker pics u3u/ @shu-shus
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good-beanswrites · 8 months ago
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Just wanted to plant an idea if you wanted a bit of fuel: Mahiru asking Yuno to come to her cell before everything goes down.
Edit: I forgot the ask didn't say it but this is part of Kyanako's incredible Order Of Attack AU!
Didn't mean for this to become a mini Mappi study but here we are ✹ Thank you for the request! I fully intended to write them hanging out, but it's more right before they hang out lol. Went a bit on-the-nose with foreshadowing, but isn't that the fun part? It has become Emotional Over Mahiru Hour...
I kept things vague, but TW for mentioning her boyfriend's state of potential self-harm
Mahiru tried not to act superstitious, she really did. As much as she loved the idea of little luck charms, or avoided easy signs of misfortune, it was easier to keep quiet about such ridiculous things.
Maybe catching a bride’s bouquet meant no guarantees; maybe there was no real harm in stepping underneath ladders, maybe a coin tossed into a fountain had no real magic to its wish. However, the one thing she knew for sure held power was a lucky presence. Being in the right place at the right time could alter everything. And today was the right time for something. There was this waiting in the air. The prison had been holding its breath. Mahiru knew it was time to release it all.
“You must be so lonely, why don’t you let big sis Mahiru keep you company?” She beamed at Amane.
She often recalled the good fortune that she and a certain young man had crossed paths on the university terrace. She used to laugh with him about the wonderful coincidence of bumping into each other outside of the bakery, then the convenience store. 
Though she’d never spoken about it to him, she was also grateful for many occasions where she walked in on him at the precise moment to talk him out of something reckless. She always told him that they’d do everything together. He didn’t need to be alone anymore. 
“I wish to be alone. I need peace of mind to think.” Amane turned away from the cell door.
It was a good thing, too. Mahiru’s smile wasn’t as convincing as she said, “o-oh. Of course.”
She made her way around the panopticon, hearing Fuuta pace his cell in anticipation. He must have felt it too, this holding of breath. 
Or perhaps not. He turned down her offer for a bit of company, including a few more colorful words than Amane had. Mahiru just apologized for bothering him and headed back to her cell. She wasn’t sure where Mikoto was at this hour, but she didn’t feel like smiling through a third rejection.
She shook her head back and forth. She wished the motion could rattle the voices inside, she wished she could shake them all away. With her arms secured in place she could no longer cover her ears. She used to hum to keep them at bay, but lately they’d been too loud to stifle. They just kept on talking.
Their words told her the two were right. Nobody needed her company. No – nobody wanted it. Being together hadn’t helped her boyfriend. In fact, being together had been the very thing that got him killed. No wonder Amane and Fuuta wanted to avoid her. 
So then, this was for the best. She would rather deal with the brief sting of refusal than stumble in one day to find them hurt
 or worse. As much as she tried to avoid the superstition of it all, the voices reminded her that her very presence could mean life or death. 
“Mappi, are you alright?” Mahiru hadn’t realized a tear had slipped down her cheek until she hurried to swipe it away in front of Yuno. 
“Hah, I’m fine! Just fine.” It was impossible to fool her, Mahiru had learned, but that never stopped her from trying. 
At least she always spoke tactfully. “Rough morning?”
Mahiru shifted her arms in her uniform, making a small sound of agreement.
“Can I do anything to help? What if I stay with you for a bit? I can do your hair, and
”
The voices were right. Amane and Fuuta knew it, too. Presences did hold power, and Mahiru’s was cursed.
But she would sound foolish admitting such a fear to Yuno. She'd heard plenty from the voices about how stupid and airheaded she was, there was no use in getting the same lecture from someone as grounded as her.
Mahiru managed a weak protest, unable to explain her real reasoning. Yuno was insistent. She didn’t give much of a choice. Could she feel the strangeness of the prison, as well? 
At last, Mahiru allowed her shoulders to sag. Yuno was lucky. And kind. Having her nearby would do her good. Amane and Fuuta would be alright. Mahiru had tried spending more time with them after verdicts were announced. Now, she made a mental note to pull back. If her love couldn’t save anyone, at least she could spare them from her curse. They would be safe. 
“Yes. Please stay. The truth is... I don't want to be alone.”
#milgram#mahiru shiina#yuno kashiki#amane and fuuta mentioned#i dont know how well this all fits in with your vision of the au but i had a ton of fun with this lmao sorry 😂#oh hey if anyone knows any japanese superstitions like those in the beginning lmk#i was trying to research them but i kept getting lucky symbols/words - not necessarily actions like that#anyway thank you so much for this!! it was a really interesting moment to capture >:0#drabbles that take me way too long to combine my three brain cells but im really pleased with the end result#i had a lot of Mahiru Thoughts but it took a bit of fiddling to make them fit together#the superstitiousness - the focus on one's presence - the parallels with his bf - what she's dealing with from the voices#im glad it came together semi-smoothly in the end asdfsd#i didnt mean for mahiru t break the fourth wall or anything --#i always saw her as a master at picking up on social changes/cues so she can tell when things are most tense/kotoko is fully prepared#but she doesnt consciously know it -- she just knows that things feel Off#not only do the attacks confirm mahirus fear that shes cursed - but yunos involvement confirms her belief that shes extra lucky#i wonder if shed still end up spending all her time with yuno now that she thought she was such a protective person...#i couldnt articulate it right since the end was wrapping up so nicely - but mahiru starts to wonder if most people are fine being left alon#and *shes* the odd one out for craving company#then she feels isolated because by getting what she wants shes dooming someone else#i mean... if everyone you try to get close to starts getting hurt... wouldnt you worry about the same...?#AHAHAHAHA hope you enjoyed 🙃#*posts this then retreats back into the void for a bit*#drabbles
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