#i did it my brother's way which is the poor man's guac

[july-19th-club]

avocado is crazy no matter how much of it you eat you are never full just from avocado . those green little greasy guys are like if a vegetable was made of air

[wetrumpfeed]

Afternoon MAGAthread: YOUR WEEKLY PRESIDENTIAL RECAP!

HAPPY SATURDAY DEPLORABLES!

This is u/ivaginaryfriend here and I'm back with all things dank & spicy from the past week! For those that missed any past recaps you can check those out here!

Sunday, March 31st:

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

“Outrageous, it’s the Adam Schiff problem. People abusing the access to classified data to then go out in public and make allegations that didn’t prove to be true. You look at a decision to essentially investigate a political rival. Who made it?” James Freeman, @WSJ

The Democrats are allowing a ridiculous asylum system and major loopholes to remain as a mainstay of our immigration system. Mexico is likewise doing NOTHING, a very bad combination for our Country. Homeland Security is being sooo very nice, but not for long!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Virtue signalling only goes so far

Creepers Veepers

🤣🤣🤣

Sen. Rand Paul offered an amendment, which, if approved, would reveal what role former President Barack Obama played in the investigation of the Trump campaign

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

When Guns Are Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Have Guns

Clearing up the misunderstanding.

Posted in UK airport bathroom. If only Islam allowed women to read

12-year promise

Monday, April 1st:

TODAY'S ACTION:

One Nomination Sent to the Senate

Proclamation on World Autism Awareness Day, 2019

Ivanka Trump Visits Toyota Plant in Kentucky

President Trump Participates in the 2019 Prison Reform Summit and First Step Act Celebration

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

Now that the long awaited Mueller Report conclusions have been released, most Democrats and others have gone back to the pre-Witch Hunt phase of their lives before Collusion Delusion took over. Others are pretending that their former hero, Bob Mueller, no longer exists!

Democrats, working with Republicans in Congress, can fix the Asylum and other loopholes quickly. We have a major National Emergency at our Border. GET IT DONE NOW!

Can you believe that the Radical Left Democrats want to do our new and very important Census Report without the all important Citizenship Question. Report would be meaningless and a waste of the $Billions (ridiculous) that it costs to put together!

The cost of ObamaCare is far too high for our great citizens. The deductibles, in many cases way over $7000, make it almost worthless or unusable. Good things are going to happen! @SenRickScott @senatemajldr @SenJohnBarrasso @SenBillCassidy

No matter what information is given to the crazed Democrats from the No Collusion Mueller Report, it will never be good enough. Behind closed doors the Dems are laughing!

Democrats should stop fighting Sen. David Perdue’s disaster relief bill. They are blocking funding and relief for our great farmers and rural America!

Everybody agrees that ObamaCare doesn’t work. Premiums & deductibles are far too high - Really bad HealthCare! Even the Dems want to replace it, but with Medicare for all, which would cause 180 million Americans to lose their beloved private health insurance. The Republicans..... ... ....are developing a really great HealthCare Plan with far lower premiums (cost) & deductibles than ObamaCare. In other words it will be far less expensive & much more usable than ObamaCare. Vote will be taken right after the Election when Republicans hold the Senate & win...... ... ....back the House. It will be truly great HealthCare that will work for America. Also, Republicans will always support Pre-Existing Conditions. The Republican Party will be known as the Party of Great HealtCare. Meantime, the USA is doing better than ever & is respected again!

The Democrats today killed a Bill that would have provided great relief to Farmers and yet more money to Puerto Rico despite the fact that Puerto Rico has already been scheduled to receive more hurricane relief funding than any “place” in history. The people of Puerto Rico..... ... ....are GREAT, but the politicians are incompetent or corrupt. Puerto Rico got far more money than Texas & Florida combined, yet their government can’t do anything right, the place is a mess - nothing works. FEMA & the Military worked emergency miracles, but politicians like..... ... ....the crazed and incompetent Mayor of San Juan have done such a poor job of bringing the Island back to health. 91 Billion Dollars to Puerto Rico, and now the Dems want to give them more, taking dollars away from our Farmers and so many others. Disgraceful!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Remember, we here at CNN always give you the REAL NEWS! Only the stories that matter. #FactsFirst #OrangeManBad

Does anyone have any info on who made this GIF we at CNN would like to uhhh give him an award!

BIDEN 2020!!!

A 13 year old can get an abortion without her parents knowing but she can't go see a movie about abortion without a parent accompanying her

AP reports Beto gives speech in Spanish...his native language. Ted Cruz sets them on fire.

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

We’re coming to assimilate, obey the laws of the US and vote Republican!

I love CNN! They are the most trusted name in news... and I especially love that manly guy Brian Stelter! And he’s just so cute too. He reminds me of Winnie the Pooh! He’s like a cuddly little Teddy Bear that I can trust to tell me that Orange man is indeed, bad. Happy 1st of April everyone!

Congratulations CNN!

We here at CNN want to pay our respects to our fearless commentator Ana Navarro. She never lets the thought of Americans murdered by illegals keep her from doing her nails. Keep slaying Queen!

Tuesday, April 2nd:

TODAY'S ACTION:

President Donald J. Trump Announces Intent to Nominate and Appoint Individuals to Key Administration Posts

President Donald J. Trump Announces Judicial Nominees and United States Marshal Nominee

First Lady Melania Trump Visits with Students in Florida

President Trump Welcomes the 2018 Stanley Cup Champions to the White House

President Trump Meets with the Secretary General of the North Atlantic Treaty Organization

Vice President Pence Meets with Family Members of Executives Detained by Maduro

President Trump Participates in an Expanded Bilateral Meeting with the Secretary General of NATO

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

Puerto Rico got 91 Billion Dollars for the hurricane, more money than has ever been gotten for a hurricane before, & all their local politicians do is complain & ask for more money. The pols are grossly incompetent, spend the money foolishly or corruptly, & only take from USA.... ... ....The best thing that ever happened to Puerto Rico is President Donald J. Trump. So many wonderful people, but with such bad Island leadership and with so much money wasted. Cannot continue to hurt our Farmers and States with these massive payments, and so little appreciation!

In 1998, Rep.Jerry Nadler strongly opposed the release of the Starr Report on Bill Clinton. No information whatsoever would or could be legally released. But with the NO COLLUSION Mueller Report, which the Dems hate, he wants it all. NOTHING WILL EVER SATISFY THEM! @foxandfriends

World Autism Awareness Day 2019: Significance, history and theme via @htTweets

Robert Mueller was a God-like figure to the Democrats, until he ruled No Collusion in the long awaited $30,000,000 Mueller Report. Now the Dems don’t even acknowledge his name, have become totally unhinged, and would like to go through the whole process again. It won’t happen!

There is no amount of testimony or document production that can satisfy Jerry Nadler or Shifty Adam Schiff. It is now time to focus exclusively on properly running our great Country!

After many years (decades), Mexico is apprehending large numbers of people at their Southern Border, mostly from Guatemala, Honduras and El Salvador. They have ALL been taking U.S. money for years, and doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for us, just like the Democrats in Congress!

Video

“I haven’t seen any Democrats down here at the Border working with us or asking to speak to any of us. They have an open invitation. We are getting overrun, our facilities are overcapacity. We are at an emergency crisis.” Art Del Cueto, National Border Patrol Council.

Today, we celebrate the tremendous accomplishments of Americans with ASD and reaffirm our commitment to work together to ensure that every member of our society is afforded equal opportunities to reach their full potential. #WorldAutismAwarenessDay

Today, it was my great honor to welcome @NATO Secretary General @JensStoltenberg to the @WhiteHouse!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

I can't believe how much lies exist about this subreddit

Worst Racist Ever

82.5% of /r/Socialism users are Middle School to College aged. 61% live with their parents. No wonder Reddit loves Socialism, they've never had to work for anything in their life.

Powerful moment from President Trump’s Prison Reform Summit. Gregory Allen, one the people who have benefited from the First Step Act explained, "Two months ago, I was in a prison cell and now I'm in the White House. Let’s continue to make America great again!"

YES OR NO: Did she marry her own brother? SNOPES: Well, "like many other people" - she can't answer if she married her own brother because it's "complicated" - NO IT F'ING ISN'T SNOPES!

Many of CNN's national security analysts have undisclosed ties to oppressive Qatari regime - Conservative Review

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

Right!!!

we lost the guac

Democrat Priorities

Well.... IT'S TRUE AF

Wednesday, April 3rd:

TODAY'S ACTION:

Memorandum on Combating Trafficking in Counterfeit and Pirated Goods

President Trump is Briefed by Senior Military Leaders

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

I was never planning a vote prior to the 2020 Election on the wonderful HealthCare package that some very talented people are now developing for me & the Republican Party. It will be on full display during the Election as a much better & less expensive alternative to ObamaCare... ... ...This will be a great campaign issue. I never asked Mitch McConnell for a vote before the Election as has been incorrectly reported (as usual) in the @nytimes, but only after the Election when we take back the House etc. Republicans will always support pre-existing conditions!

Congress must get together and immediately eliminate the loopholes at the Border! If no action, Border, or large sections of Border, will close. This is a National Emergency!

The First Step Act proves that our Country can achieve amazing breakthroughs when we put politics aside, and put the interests of ALL Americans FIRST. http://45.wh.gov/gF3mc7

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

President Trump is hilarious and savage! LMAO "I Went To Kiss The General And I Felt Like Joe Biden"

Two more women accuse Biden of inappropriate touching

"Contractually all I have to do is not fake a hate crime." Tracey Morgan trashes Jussie Smollett while discussing his new role on Empire. 😂😂

Ratings for CNN and MSNBC continuing to crash, as viewers migrate to Fox News prime time. Karma comes calling, as Tucker Carlson alone draws a million more viewers than CNN's entire prime-time lineup.

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

Nooooooo Joe, NOT DURING THE APOLOGY!

GAME OVER AMERICA, GAME OVER

Biden 2020

Just imagine

r/The_Donald actually has 6 million subscribers and is 3rd most active community on Reddit.

The Expert | 2054

Thursday, April 4th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

Nine Nominations Sent to the Senate

President Trump Participates in the White House Opportunity and Revitalization Council Meeting

President Trump Meets with the Vice Premier of the People's Republic of China

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

THE REPUBLICAN PARTY IS THE PARTY OF THE AMERICAN DREAM!

Despite the unnecessary and destructive actions taken by the Fed, the Economy is looking very strong, the China and USMCA deals are moving along nicely, there is little or no Inflation, and USA optimism is very high!

According to polling, few people seem to care about the Russian Collusion Hoax, but some Democrats are fighting hard to keep the Witch Hunt alive. They should focus on legislation or, even better, an investigation of how the ridiculous Collusion Delusion got started - so illegal!

There is nothing we can ever give to the Democrats that will make them happy. This is the highest level of Presidential Harassment in the history of our Country!

The New York Times had no legitimate sources, which would be totally illegal, concerning the Mueller Report. In fact, they probably had no sources at all! They are a Fake News paper who have already been forced to apologize for their incorrect and very bad reporting on me!

WELCOME BACK JOE!

Thank you @Trish_Regan!

“Democrats need to help fix the border crisis or get out of Trump’s way”

“Conservative support for Trump wall soars to 99 percent”

.@ByronYork: “How bad does border have to be for Democrats to admit it's an emergency?”

I am pleased to announce that Jovita Carranza will be nominated as the new @SBAgov Administrator. She will be replacing Linda McMahon, who has done an outstanding job. Jovita was a great Treasurer of the United States – and I look forward to her joining my Cabinet!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Just heard MSNBC pays Rachel Maddow $7 mil a year. The average salary for a garbage truck driver is $40,000. Why is delivering garbage worth 175 times more than hauling it away?

The tables have turned! A new poll shows that 47% of Americans now suspect that Hillary Clinton was the one who might have colluded with foreign operatives.

DESPITE BEING 13%...

WikiLeaks: Assange will be expelled from Ecuadorian Embassy within 'hours to days' - would be removed and subject to arrest by British authorities.

Islamists Arrested After Plotting to Massacre Kindergarten Children

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

🐄 Milking A Dead Cow 🐄

2020s memes are going to be fantastic.

That face you make...

The Left Today

The Logic of the Left

Friday, April 5th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

President Donald J. Trump Announces Intent to Nominate Individual to a Key Administration Post

President Trump Delivers a Statement Upon Departure

Proclamation on National Volunteer Week, 2019

President Trump Participates in a Roundtable on Immigration and Border Security

President Trump Visits the Border Wall in Calexico, California

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

“Trolling the Mueller Report. Democrats Lost On Collusion. Now They’re Inventing A Coverup.” @WSJopinion James Freeman @LouDobbs

The Crazed and Dishonest Washington Post again purposely got it wrong. Mexico, for the first time in decades, is meaningfully apprehending illegals at THEIR Southern Border, before the long march up to the U.S. This is great and the way it should be. The big flow will stop....... ... ....However, if for any reason Mexico stops apprehending and bringing the illegals back to where they came from, the U.S. will be forced to Tariff at 25% all cars made in Mexico and shipped over the Border to us. If that doesn’t work, which it will, I will close the Border....... ... ....This will supersede USMCA. Likewise I am looking at an economic penalty for the 500 Billion Dollars in illegal DRUGS that are shipped and smuggled through Mexico and across our Southern Border. Over 100,00 Americans die each year, sooo many families destroyed!

Heading to the Southern Border to show a section of the new Wall being built! Leaving now!

JOBS! JOBS! JOBS!

Congratulations to Brian Hagedorn on his big surprise win over a well funded Liberal Democrat in the Great State of Wisconsin for a very important Supreme Court seat. Republicans are producing big for Wisconsin!

I’ve employed thousands of Electrical Workers. They will be voting for me!

“America Created 196,000 Jobs in March, Beating Expectations for 170,000”

The press is doing everything within their power to fight the magnificence of the phrase, MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! They can’t stand the fact that this Administration has done more than virtually any other Administration in its first 2yrs. They are truly the ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE!

Will soon be landing in Calexico, California to look at a portion of the new WALL being built on our Southern Border. Within two years we will have close to 400 miles built or under construction & keeping our Country SAFE – not easy when the Dems are always fighting to stop you!

Just arrived in Calexico, California!

Join me in California for a Roundtable on Immigration and Border Security!

Just checked out the new Wall on the Border - GREAT! Leaving now for L.A.

(Retweeting The White House) Americans will write our own economic destiny. Never believe the pessimists: Pro-growth, pro-worker policies work. America is OPEN for business!

Congratulations David, a very big deal!

(Retweeting The VP)The struggle in Venezuela is between dictatorship and democracy, and freedom has the momentum. Nicolas Maduro is a dictator with no legitimate claim to power, and Nicolas Maduro must go!

THANK YOU @DHSgov, @CBP, and @ICEgov!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

President Trump's message to illegal aliens: The country is full, turn around

President Trump skips 'boring, negative' Correspondents dinner. Will be having a MAGA rally instead

YUGE! Plaque marking Trump's first Border Wall section awaits his visit to Calexico today.......We have the best commemorative plaques, don't we folks???

JUSSIE SMOLLETT OWES CHICAGO $130,000 AND MISSED YESTERDAY'S DEADLINE TO PAY IT

Mueller Report: Court Rules Attorney General Must Redact Grand-Jury Info. Democrats will complain, but the attorney general can’t be faulted for following the law.

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

👶 Pint-Sized Passport 👶

Soy overdose

Islam hates chess

The_Donald is so good, even the former VP retweets our shitposts

The DNC every time one of their candidates gets knocked out by r/The_Donald

Saturday, April 6th:

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

“The lowest average jobs number for any President since 1951, 4.1%. Economy doing great. If the Democrats win, it is all over.” @Varneyco @foxandfriends I agree!

“Collusion was a Hoax from day one.” @dbongino @foxandfriends

(Retweeting Jesse Waters) TOMORROW: It’s a star-studded FOX episode of @WattersWorld with @seanhannity , @LouDobbs , and @marklevinshow ! What will they have to say in my world? Tune in at 8PM ET to find out. #WattersWorld #FoxNews

(Retweeting The White House) "There is indeed an emergency on our southern border. It's been loud and clear."

Thank you to two great people!

I have not read the Mueller Report yet, even though I have every right to do so. Only know the conclusions, and on the big one, No Collusion. Likewise, recommendations made to our great A.G. who found No Obstruction. 13 Angry Trump hating Dems (later brought to 18) given two..... ... .....years and $30 million, and they found No Collusion, No Obstruction. But the Democrats, no matter what we give them, will NEVER be satisfied. A total waste of time. As @FrankLuntz has just stated, “Enough, America has had enough. What have you accomplished. Public is fed up.”

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Good Morning! This is your information for election this week

Obams in private meeting in Germany with Merkel violates 18 U.S. Code § 953. Private correspondence with foreign governments, and can be subject to 3 years in prison. Lock. Him. Up.

Maher defends Biden, says women should call out misconduct 'in the moment' rather than 'five years later'

"President Donald Trump’s approval rating has reached its highest point in the last 23 months, according to daily tracking poll surveyed by Rasmussen Reports."

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

BuT DoLaN’s TaX rEtUrNs!

You already know.

Joe on Joe. Now that some funny shit people.

🤡 There Are So Many DEMOCRAT 2020 Candidates, They Need A Second Car! 🤡

WEEEEW LAD!

Of course, no recap is complete without some tunes to get you jamming through all this WINNING

Sunflower

Wait A Minute!

Aftermath

Fuck Love

Tadow

MAGA ON PATRIOTS!

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