#i am amazed i didn't get an ulcer living with them. they yell and cry and stomp and throw their things around and slam doors
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wanting to be upset at someone but also rationalizing all of their actions because they have a huge smattering of trauma, emotional processing problems, adhd, and severe anxiety... sucks ass.
#i want to be upset because they are staying at my apartment#and they have gotten so frustrated about things both days they have gotten into hours long fights both days#and i am viscerally uncomfortable and feel like i'm in the way no matter where i am#but it's my house!!!#but i also feel shitty for being upset because i know that everything i listed makes it hard for them to control this sort of stuff#but i didn't fall asleep until like 2 am last night and today almost as soon as i got home from work it started again#and they are stressing me out so bad#and it is very very much feeling like when i lived with them in college and that was one of the worst years of my life#i am amazed i didn't get an ulcer living with them. they yell and cry and stomp and throw their things around and slam doors#and i just. hate it.#and i know i am probably making excuses for them with everything i said but i also feel bad for feeling this way#but i have so many friends who deal with the exact same things and i never ever feel like this with them#and it makes me not want to be their friend anymore#but i know it would WRECK them if i did because i've seen them lose friends they were close to before#and i don't want to do that to them again#and they aren't like this all the time. but it happens often enough that i get preemptive anxiety about seeing them half the time#but they haven't done it recently and i just.#i was trying to do activities in my bedroom when they were in the living room#and then in the kitchen when they were in my bedroom#but i ran out of things to do so now i'm just sitting as still as possible and making no noise on the farthest corner of my couch#and i just want them to go
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